The Dukes of Hazzard (1979) - Season 1 Edit

A crasher?

A: Boss. B: Rosco. C: The Armored Car Company

Ace Parker was Hazzard County's number two used car dealer.

ActuaIIy, y'aII fit right in.

Afraid I'm gonna beat you?

After being overcharged every step along the way.

AII I want is that oId hag's moonshine.

AII right, boys.

AII right, come on, you guys. Now put me down.

AII right, freeze!

AII right, hurry up.

AII right, men, move them out.

AII right, Mr. Hogg, Iet's get to it

AII right!

AII right!

AII right. Come on, get going.

AII right. WiII you hush?

Ain't gonna have to worry about them Arabs anymore, nor their oiI.

Ain't no way in the worId he's going to catch this car.

Ain't nothing more humiliating...

AIong with my pension, which the peopIe in Hazzard County vetoed.

Amateurs. You Iet them foIIow you right in here.

And actuaIIy passed.

And aII around generaI fIux of the nose.

And aIso ask if you've seen any suspicious characters running round here.

And Boss and Rosco on the other, we're about surrounded.

And Cousin Daisy.

And don't ask me what kind of fueIs do fossiIs run on.

And drive that truck for you tomorrow without some money.

And Enos wouIdn't Iie if his Iife depended on it.

And get rid of them hiccups.

And have me a reaI nice junkyard.

And how Mama Hogg went to stay with the Dukes for a spell...

And I get into troubIe.

And Molly wasn't mad, even though she didn't get her gun money.

And Mr. McQuade didn't Iift a finger, or a Iawyer, to heIp.

And necking with a pretty girl...

And once, we run out of gas.

And see if you can spot that President's Iimo.

And she toId me she was gonna whip the hide off me...

And since the Boars Nest was the cultural center of the county...

And thank me himseIf, in person.

And the ice cream truck is under....

And the trouble with some trouble is at first it don't look like trouble.

And then I got aII these crazy IittIe tiny sounds in my head.

And then I'II just get them. I'II just....

And then there's about 40 miIes of rough road to get to the hospitaI.

And this is one of them.

And throw Luke and Bo in jaiI.

And we're aII near getting ourseIves kiIIed so he can keep that money.

And what kind of fueI do fossiIs run on?

And you ain't caIIing Doc...

And you know it.

And you poured some of your prime high moonshine into my tank?

And, in Atlanta, it's Quirt McQuade, and most everybody knows it.

Andy was supposed to deIiver that money to McQuade, right?

Another 10 miIes, we'II be at the farm...

Any car goes down. I just Iove it!

Any further orders other than standing by...

Anyway, there's one thing more.

Are there any voIcanoes in Hazzard County?

Are we supposed to sneak out of here in an orange stock car...

As I recaII, that's supposed to be the sign over the gates of HeII.

As it is to figure out what he's really talking about.

As you know, during the course of my Iong years...

Ask the dude with the gun.

Back in '36, I beIieve that was.

Bank robbery is a federaI rap, man.

Because he could already smell that White House dinner on the stove.

Because he's a patriot. He wants to heIp his country...

Before Rosco catches up with you.

Before you start up with one of them schemes of yours...

Big John's stashing the pIates where they'II be reaI safe.

Bingo.

BIue Fox, this is Red Dog. I'm under attack.

BIue Fox, we're on our way.

Bo and Luke are just as good as in prison right now.

Bo and Luke explained the situation to Daisy...

Boss, this is Sheriff Rosco.

Both of you get out. ReaI sIow.

Brazen woman.

Breaking out of jaiI ought to prove we can handIe ourseIves.

Buddy, how couId you do that?

But a pretty short ride unIess we get some gas.

But after I Iost the money, I couIdn't bear to stay in there another minute.

But don't worry. I've got it under controI, just Iike usuaI.

But first, I gotta feeI the vibrations of the right number.

But I think I'm gonna Ieave you here, 'cause I don't want you to get invoIved.

But I'm gonna find out.

But if you are gonna do that, why did you stop by to warn them?

But in Hazzard County, the only thing that you could ever expect...

But not beautifuI.

But the rest of the day, my souI beIongs to the Iaw.

But this Hazzard race is the OIympics of dirty racing.

But this time, the ball seems to be getting through.

But you gotta understand...

But you know I can't be hauIing moonshine in a poIice car.

By midnight tonight, that farm wiII be mine.

Can be found down at the courthouse corrupting the County.

Can't sIeep.

Caught this guy goofing around with the RV tires.

CIeaning up the air, we stop air poIIution.

CIose your eyes, Enos.

CoIt and Bo and Luke Duke.

CoItrane, your driving is substandard

Come back here, you dirty thieves!

Come inside and fiII out one of these forms indicating credit reference.

Come on, y'aII. Get in!

Confess?

Cops don't hassIe peopIe who drive cars Iike this.

Cousin AIice?

Cute

Daisy, you best head on home, teII Jesse what's happened.

Daisy, you go turn down the comforter. We's gonna have us a baby.

Darn it, Bo.

DeIicious.

Did you ever have a woman get at you Iike that?

Didn't you say you thought everybody deserves a second chance?

Do y'all realize they ain't no closer to Daisy than they were in jail?

Do you get the feeIing we've been here before?

Do you two usuaIIy go unarmed?

Do your duty.

Doing those tire commerciaIs.

Don't caII me UncIe Jesse. I got enough peopIe caIIing me that.

Don't drop it, Bo.

Don't forget our 10% of that Iiquor money for turning him in.

Don't forget the FBI and the state patroI.

Don't Iook Iike anybody's home.

Don't Iook now, but Rosco is up there in that window bird dogging something

Don't look too good, does it?

Don't that put the frosting on the cake?

Don't touch me. Get them.

Don't worry.

Don't worry. Come on, give me the key.

Downstairs, Jesse was trying to trick Colt to see if the plague was phony.

Easy, Jesse.

Eight of which were stolen, and seven of which would start.

Eighteen.

EngIish

EngIish

EngIish

EngIish

Enos is last.

Enos says y'aII are as good as in prison right now.

Enos standing by as instructed, Sheriff.

Enos, I'm teIIing you, up in those hiIIs somewhere...

Everybody get in back of something.

Everybody out.

ExactIy!

Except a few pennies for my poor mama's operation.

Except for beer money.

Explaining something, anything, to Rosco is never easy.

F: Am I getting through to you?

Find a substitute for fossiI fueI.

Firearm reguIations.

Fired?

For a IittIe oId country girI, you've sure got a mind for figures.

For a sheriff.

For General Lee to be eating up the road this early in the morning...

For now, Boss Hogg is all fixed up with a jug of high octane moonshine.

For what? AII I was doing was carrying out the dying wishes of a dear friend...

Frank and Jesse.

From the Duke boys in the President's Iimousine...

From this very spot, and never knew this was here.

George Washington, Abraham LincoIn, Ben FrankIin...

Ger her inside.

Get moving, or I'II have your taiI in a wringer.

Get them up, Boss.

Get them up, Boss.

Get to know each other a IittIe better maybe.

Get up. Get over there.

Give me bodiIy injury?

Good idea. Put this away for me, wiII you?

Good news. I've got good news.

Good work. That's beautifuI.

Good.

Got you, Bandit.

Have you ever seen a race where there wasn't oiI...

He just escaped in an orange stock car...

He knew from experience how the Hazzard County justice system worked.

He must be. Everybody taIks about him.

He must have.

He needs a pIace to stay the night. I toId him he couId sIeep in the barn.

He ought to. That's good shine.

He sure is good, oId Enos is.

He took off without even hinting for a goodbye kiss.

He worked for somebody named McQuade, a gangster in AtIanta.

He's doing it. He's firing up that stiII. Just what I was saying.

He's off to the contest with nothing to stop him.

HeIIo, Dukes. Y'aII heard about the big contest?

Here you go.

Hey, Boss, this is Rosco.

Hey, Cooter! Come on down.

Hey, I got an idea.

Hey, this is Cooter coming at you.

Hey, you guys.

His entire inventory consisted of 1 1 cars...

HoIy jumping horny toads.

How come nobody eIse knows that?

How do you keep from cracking up with that oId Boss Hogg?

How's she sound? I tuned her by ear.

Howdy, Your Honor. My name is Hogg.

Howdy.

Hush!

I ain't sIeeping downstairs with the criminaI eIement.

I ain't supposed to be out of uniform under arms.

I aIready gave.

I can't beIieve my new boots finaIIy came in at the post office.

I can't teII you the number of IittIe babies I've brought into this worId.

I did aII of us a favor.

I didn't go in there to read.

I don't beIieve it.

I don't care about the baby. I care about my money.

I don't Iike it in there. It makes me wheeze.

I don't want you three to get the idea...

I doubt that...

I finished counting, you thief. Come back with my money.

I got him. And his barricade.

I got them now.

I got to Ioad up Lucifer. We got a race in Hickory tomorrow.

I got you. Just freeze it right there.

I gotta get some gas in this car here.

I guess we'II never know.

I have been inspired by many great men:

I heard about a job.

I Ioved him and he Ioved me.

I knew it. The minute I saw them Dukes buying that copper tubing...

I know it wasn't your fauIt. Never is your fauIt, Boss.

I know you can't.

I mean about Andy being in AtIanta and aII.

I mean, this wiII be the first pIace they'd start Iooking for you.

I never doubted that.

I promised them aII a big free wake at the Boar's Nest.

I said to myseIf, ''Rosco, they're making moonshine again.''

I say who steaIs what, from whom, and where.