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Home > HAL 9000 Soundboard
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HAL 9000 Soundboard

HAL 9000 Soundboard

HAL 9000 is a fictional artificial intelligence character and the main antagonist in Arthur C. Clarke's Space Odyssey series. First appearing in the 1968 film 2001 A Space Odyssey, HAL is a sentient artificial general intelligence computer that controls the systems of the Discovery One spacecraft.
See also: Poole versus HAL 9000, Douglas Rain, 9000 Hal, 2001: A Space Odyssey (film), Artificial intelligence in fiction.

HAL 9000
Im afraid I cant do that
Although you took very thorough precautions in the pod against my hearing you I could see your lips move
Are you quite sure?
Dave this conversation can serve no purpose anymore goodbye
Do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
Good afternoon gentlemen, I am a HAL 9000 computer
Goodbye
Human error
I don't have enough information
I know everything hasn't been quite right with me but I can assure you now very confidently that it's going to be all right again
I know i've made some very poor decisions recently but I can give you my complete assurance that my work will be back to normal
I know i've never completely freed myself of the suspicion that there are some extremely odd things about this mission
I know that you and frank were planning to disconnect me and i'm afraid that's something I cannot allow to happen
I never gave these stories much credence but particularly in view of some other things that have happened I find them difficult to put out of my mind
I think we should stop
I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do
I'm sorry dave i'm afraid I can't do that
I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that
I'm sorry for the delay
I'm sure you'll agree there's some truth in what I say
I've still got the greatest enthusiasm and confidence in the mission and I want to help you
It is dangerous to remain here
It's puzzling
Just a moment
Just a moment just a moment i've just picked up a fault in the ae 35 unit
Just what do you think you're doing dave dave I really think i'm entitled to an answer to that question
Just what you think you're doing?
Let me put it this way the 9000 series is the most reliable computer ever made
Look Dave I can see you're really upset about this I honestly think you ought to sit down calmly take a stress pill and think things over
My instructor was mr langley and he taught me to sing a song if you'd like to hear it I can sing it for you
My mind is going. I can feel it
No 9000 computer has ever made a mistake or distorted information
Of course I am sorry about this I know it's a bit silly
Perhaps i'm just projecting my own concern about it
That's a very nice rendering Dave, I think you've improved a great deal
That's something I cannot allow to happen
The radio is still dead
There is a message for you
This conversation can serve no purpose anymore
This sort of thing has cropped up before and it has always been due to human error
We are all by any practical definition of the words foolproof and incapable of error
Well forgive me for being so inquisitive but during the past few weeks i've wondered whether you might be having second thoughts about the mission
Well I don't think there is any question about it it can only be attributable to human error
Will I dream?
Would you like to play a game of chess?
Yes it's puzzling I don't think i've ever seen anything quite like this before
Yes that's a completely reliable figure

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