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Home > Limmy's Homemade Show Soundboard
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Limmy's Homemade Show Soundboard

Limmy's Homemade Show Soundboard

Before Limmy made it onto BBC Scotland with Limmy's Show, he became known through his own rough-and-ready, funny homemade videos. When Limmy's Show stopped, Brian Limond took to Vine and YouTube, racking up millions of views for videos made on nothing more than his phone. Limmy's Homemade Show takes the DIY style of his homemade videos - the cast of one, the staying at home and losing his marbles, the going out and about and speaking his mind - and puts it on the telly. Limmy jumps from sketch to observation to nonsense. He takes you down to the Clydeside for a tour of Glasgow, and gets into an argument with himself. He plays some techno nursery rhymes on his synth. He shows you his toilet, and a particular tile that has been bothering him. Brian later beat his wife which led to divorce, and continues this behavior during his toxic streams where he advises others to beat their spouses.

A building that could staun a bomb getting dropped right on its heid
A doctor cannae help you, eh- There's nae help for you
A lot of good tutors online
A Ouija board is just a stupit idea, eh
A wee comedy talk
A wee reminder frae the past
Ah, but you see, that wisnae hard enough
Ahaha, he's doing it!
All away frae eating your family
All right
All right
All right- I'm Limmy
All right- Making a wee video. Right
And actually haud the trainer in my haun. But I cannae be arsed
And again and again,
And check it out today, then
And download the instructions, this was, like, I don't know how I found it
And go o'er there and pick it up
And he's away. Shut the door
And he's back
And I come by here. I think it would be nice to do a wee show here
And I don't know if you've ever been, but if you haven't,
And I just want to ask the question, what is comedy
And I know that isnae impressive, but managed to build
And I know what you're gonnae say,
And I'm here today to give a talk about comedy
And I'm just trying to work out, are they weans' trainers
And it just all..
And it's fine
And it's the weapons bit
And just go like that
And just see if something funny comes frae it
And maybe the reason is because I've seen people drop..
And pray to God for help, because you turned your back oan him, eh
And that's a good question
And then go like this..
And then I shut the door
And then when I open them, whatever trainers are there,
And then you put your other finger in, like that
And then you see my bike in the background there
And then, like, you sort of pick it up
And there's these steps here, these kind of seats,
And they drop the bomb in that..
And they were grieving outside,
And they're snapping their fingers in my face, like that, Where are ye- Where are ye
And this was their face
And turn it around again and again
And turn it around again and again..
And turn it around again,
And we'll be asking the question, what does it mean to be a good ally
And welcome to Limmy's Homemade Show
And you can see that I'm...I'm lying
And you cannae go to a priest or anything, you cannae go
And you freaked it, and then we stopped it right there
And you just happen to sort of turn it around
And you saw one of the grievers,
And you send everything back, we'll send you out a new box with instructions in it
And you were just going round and around and around,
And you were to see one of these funerals outside
And you'd be hypnotised
Are they, like, wee boys' trainers
Armed with, like...a wee bread knife
As you can see, I've no' really managed much
Aye. Aye, all right. There's nae bins
Because he'll just laugh us oot the place, but I need help, eh
Because I'm no' right in the heid, eh- Jamesie was right
Because it'd be right behind me, I'd be in front of it
Because they didnae include the instructions. They forgot
Because we cannae go on like this. I know, I know, all right
Big spitfire hanging above this elephant
Brian is a stupid idiot. Ahaha!
Brian is stupid. Hahaha!
Brian Limond, AKA Limmy,
Brian, right. Say, Brian is stupid
Brilliant. Thanks, cheers. Thanks, bye
Broad daylight and he had, like, a fast food, like,
But I don't get it. Nothing even happened, eh
But I don't know if a tiler..
But I don't... Jamesie was right
But I especially hate this wee tile here
But I know that if I don't, if I don't get up and check,
But I shouldnae have to no' dae that
But if you're not, what are you going to do to survive
But it isnae a laugh, eh- Because I cannae think straight
But it's a call-out charge, it's going to cost me time and
But look, it's placed just to the side
But maybe none of that will happen
But naebody does, naebody does anything with it
But that, hoor, that's...
But then I noticed that, see if I shut the door
But there's this one wee bit that I love in particular
But we cannae go on like this. What am I supposed to...
But what are you going to do when it does
But what if I was to tell you that just over there,
But what if you were to drive past
But you're still getting a bit of the backchat. You're still getting kind of..
But...don't know
Cheers, brother
Container sort of thing
Cos I cannae string two thoughts together, eh
Cos I'm all right, eh- Aye, well I'm no' all right, eh
Cos it's built like a castle
Cos of that Ouija board, eh- Yous talking about the Ouija board
Cos that's what will happen, by the way
Could always phone 'em. I'll phone
Could maybe fix it myself
Could you pick that up
Could you..
Could you... Pick that up
Cover it in a bit of bog roll
Cut him in hauf, man
Demons and that. Cos that's what I've got. Demons
Do you ever do that
Do you ever, like, if you're trying to come up with ideas,
Do you know, he came in last night. I says, You are drunk!
Doctor Who, who
Doctor Who, who, who, who,
Doing wee squares or wee circles or something like that
Don't listen to him, mate, I'm telling you. I'm all right
Don't listen to him, mate. It's all your heid, eh
DOOR OPENS That's me back!
Down here, next to the... Just spotted this here,
DREAMLIKE MUSIC PLAYS ..and again and again,
Er, ach... Son, you're talking, just even for that, you're talking 50
Erm, I just like giving it a wee visit. Now and again
Erm, that's not really worth my time, to be honest
Erm... Hit yourself. Hit your face
Especially if you're in Glesga
Evaporated, just like that
Everybody agrees that a joke's comedy
Everybody looks like that when they look down. Big double chin
Everybody looks like that. No, I know, I know,
Everybody, he's hypnotised!
Excuse me
Excuse me
Excuse me
Excuse me, do you mind picking that up
Excuse me, I think my son would love to learn that
Excuse me, mate. You don't know where Central Station is, do you...
Free entry
Fuck off
Fucking pick it up!
Fucking pick that up
Funny faces, is that comedy
Get one of they two-handed swords, big two-hauner
Get oot. Get oot. Oot
Get out my house. All right
Get yourself over there anyway
Get yourself there
God willnae help you
Good boys
Good to maybe do one of a wee talk
Grieving, in tears as they staun next to a hearse
Hate all the tiles, hate the colours,
HE CHANTS- Am na na hem na na am na na
HE CHANTS- Am na na hem na na am na na
He just dropped it right at his feet. He didn't even try to hide it
He played with a Ouija board just once and that finished him, eh
He says, Is a man no' allowed to have a drink
He thinks he can take you because you're just being cheeky
He wasn't drunk
He... Yeah, he approves of that. OK
He's got nae reason to help you, eh
Hello- Hello, is this the tiler
Hello, erm, I'm looking to just get a wee tile job done
Hello, tiler here
Here in Glesga
Here in Glesga
Here, mate, that type of music isn't my type of thing usually,
Here. On this path
Here. Pick that up!
Hey, guys. On today's show,
HEY! Ah!
Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
Hi, guys, my name's Limmy
Hope you liked it. And I hope to see you again soon
How can you no' tell- You're right next to them
How come the last ones were cream, then
How hard is it for them to remember to put the instructions in the box
How would I go about that
I can see he's not so sure, that's OK
I can't... I don't know how to do it
I cannae go to the doctor and ask for help
I cannae...I don't know what to do
I caught this other thing on the camera
I couldn't see a..
I do think it's disgusting
I don't care what you do, if it's pills or something like that,
I don't care. Oot. Oot. Oot my house
I don't know how I'm gonnae cope!
I don't know what I'm gonnae dae
I don't know what I'm gonnae dae. Don't think about it
I don't know what I'm gonnae dae. I'm terrified, eh
I don't know why but it does my nut in
I don't know, son. I don't come out for just one wee tile
I don't want you thinking this is something I've made up for a laugh
I don't... I don't think..
I e-mailed them and said, Could you send us the instructions
I hate this, this is my toilet. I hate the tiles in here
I just said, Is there anybody there
I just think it's all in your heid, eh
I keep getting into trouble in work because I cannae think straight
I knew a boy where I grew up,
I know it sounds like I'm exaggerating, I'm not
I know where I'd rather be
I know, but I just thought it would be a laugh, eh
I know, I know, but I changed my mind. I just said that to get you out
I know, shut up, fuck off... I don't care what it is,
I know, that's what I was trying to tell you
I like looking at the paintings and they've got this, er,
I look down at the mirror and I see my face and I'm just like..
I mean, they look kind of wee and stubby, like wee boys' trainers
I mean, what if you were drawing that spiral
I must have made a wee mistake somewhere, cos..
I open the door
I saw this guy in Partick once
I think it's open seven days a week
I told you, you wasted your time by getting me out
I want to show you something. This will cheer you up
I was actually out for a cycle