Jackie Gleason Soundboard Edit

And that's nothin' but pure and simple old fashioned communism

Bank robber bank robbin' is baby shit alongside of what this dude is doin'

Do what I tell you you pile of monkey nuts!

Don't you cuss on this here radio I apologise to all the friendly folk who are listenin'

Duck or you're gonna be talkin' outta your ass!

Get off of there you schnauzer's tit!

Hold it! don't you ever ever raise your voice to me! do you know who you're talkin' to

I have just apprehended the bandit no sir you just apprehended my captain

I saw that you sombitch! you did that on purpose! you're goin' away till you're grey!

I'll thank you not to use that kind of language in my presence

I'm gonna barbecue your ass in molasses!

Let me have a diablo sandwich a dr pepper make it fast i'm in a goddamn hurry

My hat blew off daddy I hope your goddamn head was in it

My name is sheriff buford t justice

Nice ass

Now I got that sombitch and I got him with his fly open

Oh hey for some reason or another you sounded a little taller on radio

Shut up! one shit at a time!

The goddamn germans got nothin' to do with it!

The soon I get home the first thing i'm gonna do is punch your mama in the mouth

What we're dealin' with here is a complete lack of respect for the law

You sombitches couldn't close an umbrella