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Home > Andrew Dice Clay Soundboard
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Andrew Dice Clay Soundboard

Andrew Dice Clay Soundboard

Andrew Dice Clay is an American stand-up comedian and actor. He rose to prominence in the late 1980s with a brash, deliberately offensive persona known as "The Diceman" He has appeared in several films and television shows, including Woody Allen's Blue Jasmine and Bradley Cooper's directorial debut.
See also: Rick Rubin production discography, Dice Rules (film), Dice (TV series), Blue Jasmine, The Adventures of Ford Fairlane, and Dice (album).

Warning: This soundboard may contain objectionable content, and is Not Safe For Work (NSFW)
I get up 3-4 hours early to spend more time myself. You get in.
I got a mirror on my bed, so I'm the first one I see when I wake up in the morning.
I wish I had that X-ray vision. I'd be in Victoria secrets everyday just browsing.
Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. Anyone thinks they could kick. Superman's ass is full of it. Ohh.
Meet the girl of your dreams, your whiny at diny you take home. You put your hand up a skirt y'all then a tree trunk.
No, I shouldn't. They, you know, it's like the whole world is flipped upside down.
The only thing I like about cops is the mirrored glasses. This way I could comb my hair. They're right out the ticket, so it ain't that bad.
They come over with their flag. Which would you like to buy? A flower? Yeah, and I'm going to plant it in your asshole.
They should have a sign at the airport that says, look, if you don't know the language, get the fuck out of the country.
This campaign. Is disgusting.