The Muppets Soundboard Edit

A celebrity is not a people.

Aaah

Acting. Natural

Ah! That was hot!

All good things come to an end #statler and waldorf #all good things must end #end #finish #ending #burn #insult #bad

All right, good night, buddy

All right.

And all characters under the Muppet name.

And coming up next on CDE, The Muppet Telethon.

And I just come to bury you

And if we failed, we failed together,

And the medium gauge wire for the productions. Let's go take a look.

And the Muppets are like a big family. Well..

Animal Drum Solo #animal #drums #drum solo #muppets

Because you cannot laugh! Ha ha!

Before millions of people to prove you have what it takes

But I can't leave the theater now. This is important

Check the door on Stage 28

Chill kermit #tea time #relax #kermit #tea break

Citizens of Earth, the Great Gonzo is back.

Come on, guys

Come on, Kermit. Don't let these guys down now.

Contract.

Correct!

Enjoy your anniversary dinner.

Hang on, everyone!

Happy Fourth of July #the muppets #happy fourth of july #happy independence day #july 4th #fourth of july

Happy New Year! #new years eve #2019 #kermit the frog

He's the richest plumbing magnate in the Rust Belt

Hello! Yes

Hey guys, stop. Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut

Hey, guys, check it out! Fart shoes!

Hey, these are yours, man

Hey, wait for me! I wanna help save the studio!

Hey, Walter

Hey, we're having a meeting here, man

Hurry! The show starts in ten minutes!

I always dreamed we'd be back here.

I can't see! Apollo 13!

I don't really know who you guys are. My agent just told me to show up.

I feel like a phony just being here.

I guess we're in

I love you, but you need to decide, are you a man

I miss you #i miss you #i need you #come back #kermit #miss piggy #love #can be without you

I think I'll call this room

I thought my story was pretty interesting

I wanna go with you! Oh, not again

I want to see you dance! #statler and waldorf #dance #partner #western

I went to Guinness Book of World Records... alone.

I will not air the show unless you find a real celebrity host

I'm Animal's court appointed sponsor.

I'm gonna go check on Jack Black and see if he has any ideas

I've been wearing this under my suit every single day for years!

In the name of all that's sacred, let it end!

It's going rather nicely. We might just make this

It's OK. They're really sweet.

It's OK. We'll be back to studying in two weeks.

Kemit and Fozzie Wishing You a Wonderful Holiday Season #happy holidays #holiday season #merry christmas #happy hanukkah #kermit #fozzie bear

Kermit? What are you doing here?

Kermit. We have our celebrity!

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to The Muppet Telethon!

Let's hear it for Camilla and her farmyard friends!

Let's just start at the bottom and work our way back up to the top

Look at these ceilings!

Look out below!

Not now, Fozzie

Now that's a maniacal laugh for you!

Oh, but it's nice, and... and airy

Oh, I don't care. What do you feel like?

Oh, I don't think so!

Oh, my gosh. Walter? Walter, buddy? Walter, can you hear me?

Oh, no!

Oh, this is the most romantic thing ever.

Oh, um, just a couple hours now

Oh, Walter, don't be nervous.

Oh.

OK, I've got an idea. We need a pig that can sing

OK, Muppets. You've got yourselves a show

OK, this is it. 80's Robot, let's park around back

OK, very nice.

OK, well, I guess you guys are it for today.

Ooh..

Oopsie.

Ow! Ow

Ow.

Piggy?

Ride's bogus, anyway

Rowlf? Wanna get back together?

Running home with their tails between their legs

So how'bout those shopping centers?

So remember, folks, keep on calling and you'll help us reach our goal

So, what do we do now?

Somebody, anybody, please call the police

Sooner or later, you gotta believe in yourself, too,

Sorry, kid

Sorry. I was super excited.

Statler and Waldorf #muppets #statler #waldorf #insult #burn #bad show #bad #unwatchable

Step out of the vehicle!

Swedish Chef loves Turkey #swedish chef #turkey #thanksgiving #muppets

Take my picture!

Tell you what

Thank you

Thank you, all

That's kind of impossible because the show's in 12 hours!

The show is over!

The truth is... I can't perform with you guys.

Then we have... TV executive at six o'clock!

There's no audience in the theater. Look, it's totally empty

Time once again for Veterinarian's Hospital,

To do that stuff

Ummm. No. Hey, so when are you guys leaving today?

Wait a minute. What are you doing?

Wait a second

Waka! Waka! #the muppets #fozzie bear #waka #waka waka #joke #bad joke #comedy

Walter, I thought we were gonna clean the balcony

We don't use the "d r u m" word

We drive.

We need one last act to bring us home

We need you

We'll be fine

We're getting the Muppets back together. We need you to drum again.

We're gonna have to get up on that roof

We're here!

Welcome to this week's edition of "Everything Stinks."

Well, gentlemen

Well, I... I guess...

Well, I... I just want to tell you that was a great show.

Well, it's back to the days of yore down at the old barbershop

Well, just do what I do. Pretend that the audience is naked

Well, now I am..

Well, that's that.

Well, why didn't you say so? Send him in!

What the wocka?

What're you waiting for, buddy? Get over there

Where...?

Where's everybody been?

Whoa, where you going? You threw me off balance!

Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoooa!

Why does everybody forget about Hobo Joe?

With no electricity?

Wow. I can't believe we're all back together.

Yaaay #the muppets #kermit the frog #yay #happy #excited #enthused

Yay #yay #happy #muppets

Yeah, it's just that...

Yeah, well, I've wanted to talk to you about that, you see, because...

Yes, it's Kermit. The frog.

You excited for our big trip to LA? I have our list.

You! Order 28,000 tons of plumber's putty from Beijing.

You're drenched in sweat. Did you have the dream again?

You're ruining one of the greatest songs of all time!

You're the Muppets! You do this to music!

You're the one who brought everyone here together.

# And someone to pose # Life's a piece of cake

# Life is full of glee # With someone to saw

# Mahna Mahna # Do do do do

# With someone to pedal # And someone to brake

All right. Mean lady

And you

Did you hand out all those flyers? Of course

Doing a great job, pal. You're doing a great job

Excellent. It's me, Kermit.

Gary, throw me over. What?

Good. You two have a great night. OK

Hey, shut the door! What is that?

How's the quiet life, Kermit? Piggy, froggy!

Huh? What?

I could break out the fart shoes. No, no, no, that will never work!

In the trunk. Get me outta here!

Miss..

Oh, look, an omelet station! Oh, where?

something about saving a theater. Yes, yes, of course

That was so fun! Nothing is.

The Muppet theater. Yeah.

Walter! Gary?

What about Hobo Joe? Who?

What does that mean? It's an idiom, you idiot,

What the...? Sorry

Where's..

Wow. Wow.

Yeah, head for the door. Grody to the max.

Yeah..

Yes, Kermie? Well..

Yes, sir. But, of course, it was all his fault

Yes, we are. Hi. Hello

...I don't have any talent at all

...the secrets of the universe...

'Cause I was thinking that maybe we could start at Fozzie's Joke Room...

"There's oil under this studio, see.

# A me party I'm the first and last to show

# All of us under its spell

# Am I a Muppet?

# And you and you and you and you

# But I'm standing here instead

# Here I go again

# I can't seem to wipe this smile off my face

# I don't know

# I know they're wrong Wait and see

# I've got everything that I need

# I've got everything that I need

# I've heard it too many times to ignore it

# I've heard them calling my name

# It's time to get things started

# It's time to play the music

# La la La la la la la

# Laughter

# Life's a bunch of flowers

# Life's a happy song

# Life's a happy song when there's someone by your side to sing along #

# Make'em laugh like we did then

# Now they're only pictures in my head

# Now they're only pictures in my head

# Or did something break we can't repair?

# Right in front of me

# Stoppin' me Nothin' that I can't be

# We're glad you found it

# When there's someone by my side to sing along

# When there's someone by your side to sing

# When there's someone by your side to sing along

# Who'd have thought your smorgasbord would be hard to live without?

# With you right here next to me

# Your cannonball trajectory It always gave me hope

# Ze movie's almost over It's time to say, "So long"