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Home > The Muppets Soundboard
Warning: This soundboard may contain objectionable content, and is Not Safe For Work (NSFW)
A celebrity is not a people.
Acting. Natural
Ah! That was hot!
All good things come to an end #statler and waldorf #all good things must end #end #finish #ending #burn #insult #bad
All right, good night, buddy
All right.
And all characters under the Muppet name.
And coming up next on CDE, The Muppet Telethon.
And I just come to bury you
And if we failed, we failed together,
And the medium gauge wire for the productions. Let's go take a look.
And the Muppets are like a big family. Well..
Animal Drum Solo #animal #drums #drum solo #muppets
Because you cannot laugh! Ha ha!
Before millions of people to prove you have what it takes
But I can't leave the theater now. This is important
Check the door on Stage 28
Chill kermit #tea time #relax #kermit #tea break
Citizens of Earth, the Great Gonzo is back.
Come on, guys
Come on, Kermit. Don't let these guys down now.
Enjoy your anniversary dinner.
Hang on, everyone!
Happy Fourth of July #the muppets #happy fourth of july #happy independence day #july 4th #fourth of july
Happy New Year! #new years eve #2019 #kermit the frog
He's the richest plumbing magnate in the Rust Belt
Hello! Yes
Hey guys, stop. Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut
Hey, guys, check it out! Fart shoes!
Hey, these are yours, man
Hey, wait for me! I wanna help save the studio!
Hey, Walter
Hey, we're having a meeting here, man
Hurry! The show starts in ten minutes!
I always dreamed we'd be back here.
I can't see! Apollo 13!
I don't really know who you guys are. My agent just told me to show up.
I feel like a phony just being here.
I guess we're in
I love you, but you need to decide, are you a man
I miss you #i miss you #i need you #come back #kermit #miss piggy #love #can be without you
I think I'll call this room
I thought my story was pretty interesting
I wanna go with you! Oh, not again
I want to see you dance! #statler and waldorf #dance #partner #western
I went to Guinness Book of World Records... alone.
I will not air the show unless you find a real celebrity host
I'm Animal's court appointed sponsor.
I'm gonna go check on Jack Black and see if he has any ideas
I've been wearing this under my suit every single day for years!
In the name of all that's sacred, let it end!
It's going rather nicely. We might just make this
It's OK. They're really sweet.
It's OK. We'll be back to studying in two weeks.
Kemit and Fozzie Wishing You a Wonderful Holiday Season #happy holidays #holiday season #merry christmas #happy hanukkah #kermit #fozzie bear
Kermit? What are you doing here?
Kermit. We have our celebrity!
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to The Muppet Telethon!
Let's hear it for Camilla and her farmyard friends!
Let's just start at the bottom and work our way back up to the top
Look at these ceilings!
Look out below!
Not now, Fozzie
Now that's a maniacal laugh for you!
Oh, but it's nice, and... and airy
Oh, I don't care. What do you feel like?
Oh, I don't think so!
Oh, my gosh. Walter? Walter, buddy? Walter, can you hear me?
Oh, no!
Oh, this is the most romantic thing ever.
Oh, um, just a couple hours now
Oh, Walter, don't be nervous.
OK, I've got an idea. We need a pig that can sing
OK, Muppets. You've got yourselves a show
OK, this is it. 80's Robot, let's park around back
OK, very nice.
OK, well, I guess you guys are it for today.
Ow! Ow
Ride's bogus, anyway
Rowlf? Wanna get back together?
Running home with their tails between their legs
So how'bout those shopping centers?
So remember, folks, keep on calling and you'll help us reach our goal
So, what do we do now?
Somebody, anybody, please call the police
Sooner or later, you gotta believe in yourself, too,
Sorry, kid
Sorry. I was super excited.
Statler and Waldorf #muppets #statler #waldorf #insult #burn #bad show #bad #unwatchable
Step out of the vehicle!
Swedish Chef loves Turkey #swedish chef #turkey #thanksgiving #muppets
Take my picture!
Tell you what
Thank you
Thank you, all
That's kind of impossible because the show's in 12 hours!
The show is over!
The truth is... I can't perform with you guys.
Then we have... TV executive at six o'clock!
There's no audience in the theater. Look, it's totally empty
Time once again for Veterinarian's Hospital,
To do that stuff
Ummm. No. Hey, so when are you guys leaving today?
Wait a minute. What are you doing?
Wait a second
Waka! Waka! #the muppets #fozzie bear #waka #waka waka #joke #bad joke #comedy
Walter, I thought we were gonna clean the balcony
We don't use the "d r u m" word
We drive.
We need one last act to bring us home
We need you
We'll be fine
We're getting the Muppets back together. We need you to drum again.
We're gonna have to get up on that roof
We're here!
Welcome to this week's edition of "Everything Stinks."
Well, gentlemen
Well, I... I guess...
Well, I... I just want to tell you that was a great show.
Well, it's back to the days of yore down at the old barbershop
Well, just do what I do. Pretend that the audience is naked
Well, now I am..
Well, that's that.
Well, why didn't you say so? Send him in!
What the wocka?
What're you waiting for, buddy? Get over there
Where's everybody been?
Whoa, where you going? You threw me off balance!
Why does everybody forget about Hobo Joe?
With no electricity?
Wow. I can't believe we're all back together.
Yaaay #the muppets #kermit the frog #yay #happy #excited #enthused
Yay #yay #happy #muppets
Yeah, it's just that...
Yeah, well, I've wanted to talk to you about that, you see, because...
Yes, it's Kermit. The frog.
You excited for our big trip to LA? I have our list.
You! Order 28,000 tons of plumber's putty from Beijing.
You're drenched in sweat. Did you have the dream again?
You're ruining one of the greatest songs of all time!
You're the Muppets! You do this to music!
You're the one who brought everyone here together.
# And someone to pose # Life's a piece of cake
# Life is full of glee # With someone to saw
# Mahna Mahna # Do do do do
# With someone to pedal # And someone to brake
All right. Mean lady
And you
Did you hand out all those flyers? Of course
Doing a great job, pal. You're doing a great job
Excellent. It's me, Kermit.
Gary, throw me over. What?
Good. You two have a great night. OK
Hey, shut the door! What is that?
How's the quiet life, Kermit? Piggy, froggy!
Huh? What?
I could break out the fart shoes. No, no, no, that will never work!
In the trunk. Get me outta here!
Oh, look, an omelet station! Oh, where?
something about saving a theater. Yes, yes, of course
That was so fun! Nothing is.
The Muppet theater. Yeah.
Walter! Gary?
What about Hobo Joe? Who?
What does that mean? It's an idiom, you idiot,
What the...? Sorry
Wow. Wow.
Yeah, head for the door. Grody to the max.
Yes, Kermie? Well..
Yes, sir. But, of course, it was all his fault
Yes, we are. Hi. Hello
...I don't have any talent at all
...the secrets of the universe...
'Cause I was thinking that maybe we could start at Fozzie's Joke Room...
"There's oil under this studio, see.
# A me party I'm the first and last to show
# All of us under its spell
# Am I a Muppet?
# And you and you and you and you
# But I'm standing here instead
# Here I go again
# I can't seem to wipe this smile off my face
# I don't know
# I know they're wrong Wait and see
# I've got everything that I need
# I've got everything that I need
# I've heard it too many times to ignore it
# I've heard them calling my name
# It's time to get things started
# It's time to play the music
# La la La la la la la
# Laughter
# Life's a bunch of flowers
# Life's a happy song
# Life's a happy song when there's someone by your side to sing along #
# Make'em laugh like we did then
# Now they're only pictures in my head
# Now they're only pictures in my head
# Or did something break we can't repair?
# Right in front of me
# Stoppin' me Nothin' that I can't be
# We're glad you found it
# When there's someone by my side to sing along
# When there's someone by your side to sing
# When there's someone by your side to sing along
# Who'd have thought your smorgasbord would be hard to live without?
# With you right here next to me
# Your cannonball trajectory It always gave me hope
# Ze movie's almost over It's time to say, "So long"