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Home > Ishtar (1987)
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Ishtar (1987)

Ishtar (1987)

Ishtar is a comedy film directed by Elaine May and released in 1987. Starring Warren Beatty as songwriter Lyle Rogers and Dustin Hoffman as pianist Chuck Clarke, this movie tells the humorous tale of two struggling musicians who find themselves tangled in a Middle Eastern political conspiracy. Despite being a critical and box office flop upon its release, Ishtar has developed a cult following over the years due to its witty dialogue and memorable performances.

In addition to Beatty and Hoffman, the film features a supporting cast that includes Isabelle Adjani as a revolutionary leader and Charles Grodin as a CIA agent. The musical elements of the movie are particularly noteworthy, with the comedic chemistry between Beatty and Hoffman shining through their onscreen performances as a mismatched singing duo.

If you're interested in experiencing the comedic brilliance of Ishtar, you can play and download the delightful sounds of this film by visiting the provided link. Whether you're a fan of classic 1980s comedies or simply curious about this infamous movie, Ishtar is sure to entertain and leave you with a smile on your face.

A blind camel.
A blind camel.
A blind camel. He will contact me.
A bullet in the desert is not unnatural.
A couple little steppies. Attaboy.
A couple of years ago, there was a very young grey haired couple here
A few hundred guerrillas and a mob of angry Shiites
A great bunch tonight. Good luck, kids.
A guy comes up to you and he starts talking about the poverty, the injustice in Ishtar.
A holy war that would enflame the entire Middle East.
A holy war that would enflame the entire Middle East. We found a map which could start
A little incident with a gang, you know, a lucky shot...
A little while ago, your men tried to kill two Americans in Marrakech.
A lot of acts would kill for a booking in North Africa.
A piece of sand blew in my eye? What does this mean?
A promise I'm planning to keep
A single. We were hired as a team.
Abdul? What are you doing here? Looking for you.
About an hour and a half outside of Shali Benimal.
Actually, I kind of admire that. Me too.
Against an army trained and equipped by the Americans?
Against the Emir and take over Ishtar.
Ah, it's only been an hour, it's all right.
All persons on the street after dark are subject to search and arrest.
All persons on the streets after dark are subject to search and arrest.
All persons on the streets after dark are subject to search and arrest.
All right, go on, then.
All right, pal. What do you think you're doing?
All right.
All right. ls this ? ls this the oasis?
All starting for Ishtar tonight. Armed?
All the folks That don't have money
Although 150$ a week is a start.
And 20 minutes later, Jim Harrison appears here.
And buy yourself something that's fun.
And by tomorrow afternoon, they, uh, should be dead.
And find Mohamad Mohamad.
And give her a passport, l would hardly call them pawns.
And he's not a ClA agent, he's a songwriter.
And how come you don't know what happened in that hotel room?
And I don't think she's that kind of girl.
And I must get to Marrakech today. You want my passport, right?
And I told them that if they came back here the following year,
And I wanted to give you a present To thank you for the past
And I was thinking that if we lived together, l would just make your life so much easier.
And I'll tell you another thing.
And I've been fooling myself.
And let out that you don't have the map.
And now, from the team of Rogers & Clarke,
And now, ladies and gentlemen,
And promise the Shiites that if they rise up, the Emir will fall as prophesied.
And tell these men that their camels have been stolen.
And that Lyle was recruited as a left wing agent when they, uh...
And the mighty will be humbled.
And the people have never seen a refridgerator?
And the sun will come out tomorrow.
And the way I see it, people would rather suffer with what they have than try the unknown.
And the way you walk, you can only do that with a small body.
And there is poverty and injustice in Ishtar.
And they are armed to the teeth! Get out, get out, get out.
And they can follow them all the way back to town.
And they didn't shine. What didn't?
And this is my friend Siri Darma.
And through them, the poor and lonely will rise up,
And two more from our friends!
And we ask him to keep his eyes and ears open for us and we pay him a little something.
And we back their albums, they promise not to sell it to anyone else.
And we can't afford that, Chuck, especially since Morocco signed a pact with Gaddafi.
And we don't want to be associated with that.
And we saw your ad in Variety. We're gonna be at Song Mart next Tuesday.
And we wanted to be songwriters.
And we'll broadcast as the two messengers of God
And we've been able to make a deal, general,
And we've got a new song we think is good enough for a record album.
And we've got to find her quickly before they do.
And whatever you do, don't talk.
And when I asked around, l was told the owner was staying here.
And where did you learn English? We had much delft.
And within minutes, make contact with the most hunted fugitive in the country
And you are coming with us, professor.
And you come from a young country.
Anywhere. He's on my foot.
Applaud!
Applaud! Come on!
Applaud! Pick it up! Yeah!
Are really the first step toward recruiting agents for left wing organizations.
Are the two American messengers of God dead yet?
Are they poor? Well, sure Good rhyme.
Are those vultures? Yeah. You fainted.
Are you absolutely certain that this is a map of Ishtar?
Are you all right? Yeah, fine.
Are you crazy? I'm moving.
Are you disappointed in me? No.
Are you listening to me? Uh huh.
Are you serious? Two Americans shot in a desert? Of course they'll measure.
Are you the auctioneer? Yes.
As an agent? Yeah.
As one agent to another, I've heard the Emir is a prick.
Asshole waiters screaming at me like that and taking orders, people throwing food in their faces.
Attention. A military curfew is in effect throughout Ishtar.
Attention. A military curfew is in effect throughout Ishtar.
Attention. Attention. A military curfew is in effect throughout Ishtar.
Attention. Attention. A military curfew is in effect...
Auditioning tonight at The Ad Lib for the first time, please welcome Rogers & Clarke.
Back off and take cover. I'm sending in a gunship. Over and out.
Back their albums? I'm Shirra Assel, their friend.
Bad bird! Bad! Bad! Bad!
Because if yourself You don't know why
Because the Ishtari have American choppers that they're picking off gunrunners with,
Because those are the only two places to be if you wanna sell songs.''
Before that, we were just guys...
Behave normally. We have guns pointed at your back.
Boy, you got a lot of tricks, don't you?
Boy, you're soft, pal. You are soft.
Break off a pinch of you
Brown nosing the commies won't get you my girl.
But be careful, because they may be looking for us.
But he doesn't like the idea of your friend dealing with a known communist.
But I know that tomorrow is another day.
But if anything should happen to my clients, the map is up for grabs.
But it is much harder.
But perhaps this is too much to ask, even of a man with so brave a name.
But right now, we're just refining our songs, you know, so we don't get ripped off
But that they are executed as ordinary political prisoners
But that's near here, isn't it?
But the main thing is to get you out of town before you're recognised.
But there's no danger if you don't drive in the countryside.
But these are better because they've already been tested in battle.
But we don't know where it is. But we know who has it.
But we need our own men here because if anything happens to them,
But we're down to nothing now. Really?
But we're not singers. No, we're songwriters.
But you can't really put a price on democracy.
But, Marty Taxi!
By people like Simon & Garfunkel and, you know, Springsteen.
By the time we are asked to produce it, Ishtar will be ours.
By tonight, they'll be out of water, miles from the well.
Can I give it to her with you? Yeah.
Can you be telling the truth?
Can you believe this? Huh?
Can you give us another half hour?
Carol. What do you care?
Celebrating their 51st wedding anniversary. And last year, they came back
Celebrating their 51st wedding anniversary. And last year, they came back A couple of years ago, there was a very young grey haired couple here
Celebrating this evening their 53rd wedding anniversary.
Chuck, I know how bad you feel, but there's people in this world worse off than you.
Chuck, I know how bad you feel, but there's people in this world worse off than you. Oh, my God, Rabbi Pierce is here. Charles, you remember Rabbi Pierce.
Chuck, Shirra Assel arrived in Marrakech last night using your passport.
Chuck, this isn't really a good time to get depressed.
Chuck, while I was waiting for you here,
Chuck!
Chuck!
Chuck! Chuck, get up!
Chuck! Chuck!
Chuck?
Chuck? Hi.
Closer. You really know the lingo.
Come in as low as you can. They'll hold still for you.
Come in, 011 401.
Come in, 011 401. 011 401, this is Circuit breaker.
Come on now, Lyle. Get a pencil.
Come on, buddy. Easy, boy. Easy, boy.
Come on, Chuck.
Come on, come on, hurry!
Come on, don't turn away from Mama. Come on.
Come on, give me your hand.
Come on, let's move these. Big, dumb, stupid ass camel!
Come on, now, get up! You idiot!
Come on, now. Come on.
Come, my friends. Quickly, this way.
Coming here is gonna change our lives, you know?
Congress will have a fit if they find out there's another ClA hit list.
Contact you?
Could I have a map instead? There is no map of the desert.
Could that be a mirage?
Cry? You don't get it. She likes me. She gave me the golamine beads. She told
Damn it! Take it easy, take it easy.
Dangerous!
Did you ever hear of a big sports car? I mean, if I looked like you
Did you know that Gaddafi has signed a pact with Morocco?
Did you know that in Ishtar the dome of the Emir's palace is gold?
Did your daddy ever take you fishing? My father is dead.
Did your daddy ever take you fishing? My father is dead. Get yourself a nice kite or a fishing pole.
Do an autograph for my kid. Here. Come on.
Do me a favour. Do me a favour.
Do not turn around. Take those.
Do you know anything about the desert?
Do you know how to use a grenade launcher?
Do you love me, Chuck? Look, Carol, you're wonderful.
Do you really expect them to swallow such nach nach.
Do you understand English? Yes.
Does The Hawk fly?
Does this look like an oasis to you? Yeah, look at the birds.
Don't advise us. We don't want to be advised. We're not paying you, okay?
Don't be mad at me, Chuck. Charles, it's Rabbi Pierce.
Don't come any closer, Lyle. And don't call me Hawk.
Don't do that. Hey. Huh?
Don't hustle us. I'm from New York. I'm in show business.
Don't look at me that way. You are so fucking beautiful.
Don't lose it, Lyle. Lyle? This is really interesting.
Don't play with me. I'm not such a fool!
Don't shoot! It's me, your guide. Abdul!
Don't spill it, Hawk. Don't spill it. That's it.
Don't tell him about the money. Oh, see, no.
Don't touch his mouth. One of his teeth is bad.
Don't try it, don't try it! I'll kill you in a fight.
Don't wipe your face with that. The dye's coming off on your skin.
Don't you have any sense of reality? Do you really think you can get a girl away from...?
Don't you think Daddy doesn't feel blue and I don't feel blue sometimes?
Don't you think you ought to be trying something younger?
Don't you understand that?
Dorothy.
Drop the beads as you go. When you cannot see the town anymore, stop.
Dye is carcinogenic. You're right.
Early on, I was sent by my tribe to trade with other tribes the delft of our hills.
Easy, fella. Easy. Whoa!
Easy! No!
Eh, don't hand me that crap. l don't believe a word of it
Encore!
English? English?
Especially when there are so many gunrunners and mercenaries about.
Even as you come here to trade, my sahkaro sent me there.
Every intelligence agency that has ties to the Middle East is interested in this map.
Every once in a while, an American comes over,
Everyone uses golamine beads.
Everything I told you is fake. It's all make believe.
Except the possibility that the two Americans will survive
Except the two messengers of God.
Excuse me, I'm an American. Just let me ask you one question.
Excuse me. We're coming through!
First the camels and then this.
First you're a guy and you got Chuck's passport.
Five? Five? Five?
For God's sake!
For money? Absolutely.
For whom this map is a sign to rise up against me.
Forget '' herb.'' I never heard a hit that had the word '' herb'' in it.
Forget my body.
Frankly...
Freed Talent Agency. Mr. Freed, uh, this is Chuck Clarke of Rogers & Clarke.
Fuck you! Fuck you twice!
Gaddafi's a person. He rules Libya.
Gave it to Jim Harrison, didn't you? ClA has it?
Get away from me, boy. Get away. Stay back. Stay back!
Get down.
Get General Westlake to get the 7th Battalion as an enthusiastic audience for a live concert.
Get out of here and go home. Yeah, I wanna go home.
Get up! Forget it, Chuck.
Get yourself a nice kite or a fishing pole.
Girls call me ''The Hawk.'' It's a long story, gang war, shit like that.
Give him a beer.
Give me a bourbon and a water, straight up.
Give me the cloth. I'll wrap it around your head as we speak.
Give me the rope.
Give me your hand. Hold on, Hawk. I'm coming.
Go! Quickly! Go, go!
God help me.
Good evening, sir.
Good song.
Good stuff, yes. No, thank you.
Granted. But that doesn't mean she sleeps around.
Great meeting you. I'm starved.
Great shot!
Great. We're in business.
Hakir, look...
Hakir, we want you to close your eyes and put your hands by your side,
Hakir.
Half an hour after you left this morning, l broke into your room and I stole the suitcase.
Half an hour like the last half hour?
Half an hour, half an hour Like the last half hour
Half an hour? Yeah.
Half an hour? Yeah.
Half an hour? Yeah. Can you give us another half hour?
Half an hour? Yeah. Half an hour? Yeah.
Harridan oasis.
Harridan oasis. ln a couple of hours, you'll run into the Harridan oasis.
Hasad and I will take over the transmitter
Hawk, hold on, I'm coming.
Hawk.
Hawk...
He also knows of a camel which has a crippled leg and no teeth.
He called me on the phone.
He could be sincere, he could be saying exactly what he means...
He cries every 10 minutes, Carol. He's like an orphan.
He didn't want to live with us in Queens.
He gave me his passport in Ishtar. Are these breasts?
He is. He is.
He promised he would say nothing. He gave me his word.
He says he wants to buy me a drink.
He will contact her.
He will find you a blind camel.
He will sell you both for a special price.
He'd rather just sit there than move!
He'll contact her.
He's a bad guy. Oh, knock it off.
He's aiming at us. Will you stop being paranoid!
He's got it. ls that 12? Let him have it.
He's just riding shotgun in case there's trouble.
He's landing!
He's not hiring you!
He's pointing a gun at us. No, he's not pointing it at us.
Hear, hear! How wonderful!
Her brother was killed three days ago when he found a map
Here they come. Here they come.
Here we are. Camel market. Shali Benimal.
Here, get up. Listen to me.
Here, here.
Here, I'll give you a boost.
Here, take this gown and take it behind that building there and put it on.
Here, try this:
Here's a beeper. You can get in touch with me just by using that. That's solid silver.
Here's our boy. His name is Hakir.
Here's the money. l don't think I wanna do this.
Hey, don't sit on the bed. It's too late for that now.
Hey, I wonder if we're here.
Hey, I'm glad you like them too.
Hey, ice cream truck! Stop! Over here!
Hey, it takes a lot of nerve to have nothing at your age.
Hey, shoot me or lower your voice and stop throwing Jim Harrison up to me.
Hey, that's right.
Hey, that's right. That's only 37.50$ a week for each of us.
Hey, you have a right to pick who you want.
Hey, you!
Hey! Get over here! Shoot me!
Hey! They see us!
Hey.
Hey... What?
Hi.
Hi. Hi.
Hi. Yeah.
Hide it.
Hm?
Hold her steady.
Hold it, buddy!
Hold it, pal. Who are you?
Hold on, Hawk! Hold on! I'm coming.
Hold your fire till it passes. If it stops, neutralise it. Over.
Holy shit!
Honduras? Morocco. It's safer.
How about the tip? l don't have it.
How are you doing? I'm Jim Harrison.
How can it be 20 hundred ? Twenty hundred klimsas!
How can it be 20 hundred ? Twenty hundred klimsas! Twenty hundred? Yeah.
How come you're dropping beads?
How did you find us? The beeper.
How did you get here? It's not Monday.
How do we know ? You'll know it. You can't miss it.
How do you know they'll stay there? What about birds?
How do you know what I told him? The pen.
How long before they're inoperative?
How much for the camel? Jim!
How much is it? Twenty hundred klimsas.
How much? Hundred and fifty lempiras a week.
How nice to see you. Good to see you.
How old are you, 15? What, you're voice is still changing. You're just a kid.
How safe were they?
How they die is unimportant, as long as their bodies do not disappear.
How would you know? They were probably in Kansas five minutes after the wind hit.
How you doing, Mr. Clarke? Come on in, Mr. Clarke. Make your phone call in here.
How's your foot? Good, good. Better, thanks.
However, I see no difficulty in meeting your timetable.
However, when two Americans on their way to Marrakech arrive in Ishtar by way of Air Canary
Huh?
Huh?
I also recognize two guys from Turkish intelligence.
I am Ahmad bin Ali. I'm the caid of Assari. it was I that called out ''The Yellow Rose of Texas.''
I am proficient in 7th century Kufic. This map is incredible.
I can't remember. Oh.
I don't have any talent. I don't have any money.
I don't know anything about a map.
I don't understand it. It was just an hour and a half outside of Shali Benimal.
I got it, I got it.
I have brought about your deaths. We will die together.
I lived with my parents till I was 32.
I loved her well Yes!
I mean that. You're a wonderful woman.
I mean, you don't know much about where you are in terms of where you are, but...
I mean, you walk into a place like that and girls just want you.
I met her and I fell No, no. Cut out ''and I.''
I met her, fell Yes!
I met her, wham! Yes!
I met her... Bam! Let me try. Let me try.
I promised I'd love you forever
I read you.
I see.
I see.
I think it's very important not to let yourself get too run down when you come out here.
I wanna kiss every inch of you, get in a clinch with you.
I want those bullets to look like they came from the ground.
I will meet you. When?
I won't call the police.
I won't stand for it. I just can't walk out on him.
I'll be back in a while. Oh, right, I'll be here.
I'll be right back.
I'll find an Air Canary agent. You watch the luggage.
I'll find an Air Canary agent. You watch the luggage. Excuse me, I'm an American. Just let me ask you one question.
I'll have a beer.
I'll never find Miss Right and Carol left me.
I'm a total failure. Don't move, I'll be right over.
I'm Abdul, their guide. Marty Freed. I'm their agent.
I'm from New York. Oh, me too.
I'm leaving some love in my will
I'm not crying! A piece of sand blew in my eye!
I'm not depressed anymore. it shows you where you are
I'm not proud of it and I'm not ashamed of it.
I'm not, Lyle. You are the kind of guy I thought you were.
I'm outside on the ledge of my apartment.
I'm positive.
I'm positive. Are you absolutely certain that this is a map of Ishtar?
I'm sorry, just... it comes over me in waves every few minutes.
I'm sorry, old man, but a translator who speaks all Berber dialect and English but no Arabic?
I'm sorry. I turned left on Mucckamal Haifa Boulevard.
I'm sorry. That's okay. That's all right.
I'm talking to you. l hear you.
I'm telling you, if we get an agent, we get a record album.
I've been looking for you all night. Fortunately, I had a paying passenger.
I've been looking for you. Why? ls your life in danger again?
I've got a helicopter waiting. May I speak briskly?
I've just dribbled my life away.
I've never thought of it that way. Yes.
If he talks, we'll all be dead by tomorrow. And our families.
If they survive the desert, they will not survive that.
If this gets into the newspapers, the scandal will ruin me in show business.
If we can just stay alive for a couple days, they'll find us.
If you decide I'm telling the truth, go to the camel market in Shali Benimal.
If you never see me again,
If you will return the contents of my suitcase to me.
If you'd have a chance to come down The Record Album?
In terms of the sun.
In terms of the sun. I'm not depressed anymore. it shows you where you are
Is it?
Ishtar is on the brink of revolution now.
It has to be official!
It is a map. Well, yeah!
It is a pity you told him we don't have the map, but you did.
It is done.
It means my life.
It means my life. That means your life too?
It means my life. You see...
It means the life of anyone in Ishtar.
It speaks of a time of upheaval when two messengers will appear in Ishtar.
It was just an accident.
It'll only be one time less a week than you see me now.
It's What's the matter?
It's a disaster.
It's a free country. No thanks to you and Lyle.
It's a little rough right now because the communists are trying to instigate a coup
It's another One of the things I bought.
It's basically a try out place for new material.
It's funny, isn't it? You never appreciate your own country until you leave it.
It's getting nippy.
It's gonna be night. You don't need water at night.
It's hot today.
It's not ''smuck,'' it's schmuck.
It's not called The Record Album. It's called The Song Mart, sir.
It's not called The Record Album. It's called The Song Mart, sir. No, no, no, no. At The Record Album?
It's not the real lining. Someone sewed it in.
It's only the beginning. You're a true American.
It's the only bar in the neighbourhood that's open.
It's them!
It's uncanny, isn't it? it speaks of two messengers. And now we two have found it just as it foretold.
It's uncanny, isn't it? it speaks of two messengers. And now we two have found it just as it foretold. and the mighty will be humbled.
Jim Harrison. Ah, Your Excellency.
Jim, I don't know what you had in mind, but this action is no longer covert.
Jim, I know nothing of any of this.
Jim, l'd like to go over these directions with you once more before Lyle comes back.
Jim, the enemy of my enemies is my friend.
Jim, you called it. Hasn't moved in almost 20 minutes.
Jim? Yeah.
Just pretend like I'm not here.
Just wait a minute. Just drink a little bit of this.
Kahwa? No, thanks.
Keep hitting the '' used is better than new'' idea.
Keep it, keep it! You can buy me a drink when I get to Morocco.
Keep walking and don't talk loud. Why? What's the matter?
Keep your voice down. Point at the camel as we speak.
Kif? Hashish? Hashish?
L also can get you 10 weeks in Morocco at 950 dirham a week.
L am a member of the party that opposes the Emir.
L am begging you to give me the chance to overthrow a tyrant.
L am speaking English. You tell me, I tell him.
L beg you. I'm in desperate need. Oh, look, I'm...
L believe you, Chuck, I believe you. But we think that your roommate does.
L bet we could have any woman in this club.
L bought a few things. A hand dyed Tuareg gown here.
L can check. Yes, check.
L can't believe these men may control the fate of the Middle East.
L can't even see the town anymore.
L can't hold her too tight because it hurts her tooth.
L can't understand. We should've hit that oasis seven minutes ago.
L don't believe it. This man is a fake.
L don't have a lot of cash, but why don't you take this.
L don't know what to do without Willa.
L don't know what you're talking about.
L don't see any beads shining, do you?
L don't think it's right to take money for keeping a guy like the Emir of Ishtar in power.
L don't think it's smart to keep walking out here in the desert.
L don't. And you don't know about the map?
L feel a little funny not telling Lyle about this. Know what I mean?
L feel like this is a very special part of the evening.
L found it.
L gave them to your roommate when we exchanged jackets.
L gave you my passport. l carried all your stuff out of Ishtar.
L gave you my passport. l carried all your stuff out of Ishtar. The only reason Jim Harrison hired me was because you recruited Lyle as a communist.
L go to the camel market in Shali Benimal, l ask Mohamad and tell him I wanna buy a blind camel.
L go to the camel market in Shali Benimal. Ask for Mohamad and tell him I wanna buy a blind camel.
L got good news for you. What?
L grabbed them all, I put them in his suitcase and I put on his clothes
L guess I just have the blues. Yeah.
L had to check. We had to make sure you didn't know what was involved
L have hidden it, Shirra. l can't tell you where over the phone.
L have no one to protect me.
L have thought of that too.
L heard there was another American in the hotel, l thought l'd buy you dinner.
L hope to God you do. Yes.
L just have to make sure that you're Miss Right. Don't you want to make sure that I'm
L just loved you. Thank you, thank you.
L knew from what he said on the phone that he had hidden the map somewhere in his things.
L knew you were a nice girl.
L know, but I was scared l couldn't get here on time.
L lost my passport. But we'll report it to the embassy I'll get another one right away. It's no big deal.
L love you, Chuck. Thanks.
L mean, I respect your way of life, but, shh shh shh, it just isn't mine.
L met this guy in Ishtar who had pull at the embassy.
L never even dated anybody but Willa.
L never even had a chance to look through the things I had packed.
L not supposed to have him permanently, I don't think. It's just... I think it's a kind of a sign.
L packed them the night he was killed.
L read you, Circuit breaker. This is 011 401 .
L really appreciate it. Sure. My pleasure.
L remember them not shining.
L see. You will be there to verify it.
L shouldn't have played in here. And time goes by so fast
L speak no Arabic. l am a Berber from the north of here.
L think about you all the time.
L think I can get you a booking.
L think I'm gonna drive around for a while, try to come down off this high.
L think we've hit some gunrunners.
L think you're right. Give me that scarf.
L thought you wanted to take the car because the keys were gone.
L told you not to tell anyone.
L understand all Berber dialects.
L used to hunt every day before the tyre factory opened.
L wanna buy a blind camel.
L wanna keep an eye on him, make sure he doesn't get into trouble.
L want no more rumours. And it has to be done by next weekend.
L want the contents of my suitcase. Sure. Here.
L want to announce their death tonight.
L want to do some thinking. Me too.
L was
L was going for a walk.
L was hunted almost from the start.
L was just coming back to get you. Oh, I just ran out to get you.
L was wondering who lived here.
L will meet you tonight in Marrakech.
L wish this gun was mounted.
L would never hold out on Lyle.
L'd come home in the evening and write songs.
L'd have a song written for them. And they're back.
L'd like to get up, but I got such jet lag.
L'd like to go over the Shirra Assel situation with you.
L'd like to sing a few songs tonight from the Simon & Garfunkel songbook.
Ladies and gentlemen, all passengers holding tickets for Morocco,
Ladies and gentlemen, by popular demand,
Ladies and gentlemen, Lyle Rogers! Thank you, I'm Chuck Clarke!
Let me tell you something! If she's anybody's girl, it's the guy you're sitting in back of!
Let me tell you what I told Tony Bennett.
Let them come in closer. When I give you the signal, stand and fire.
Let's get the hell out of here! They don't look dead to me.
Let's go.
Let's go. Chopper, come here! Come here!
Let's go. Chopper, come here! Come here! Let's get the hell out of here! They don't look dead to me.
Let's walk.
Let's work together as agents. My pleasure. Talk to you soon.
Libya?
Life isn't that bad, I just have a lot of pain.
Listen to me. You have seen Ishtar, you have seen the poverty.
Listen, don't call the police.
Listen...
Ln a couple of hours, you'll run into the Harridan oasis.
Ln fact...
Ln the Hawaiian shirts? No. The Bermuda shorts.
Lnteresting work? It's okay.
Look at it. What?
Look at that, Simon & Garfunkel's Greatest Hits.
Look at the upside. We're not living lives of quiet desperation.
Look at this thread, it's all sloppy and crooked.
Look at what you have. l am a woman.
Look, I'm with someone. She's in the, uh, bathroom.
Look, let me just check this out with someone.
Loosen the rope. Don't let her scream.
Ls he blind? Yeah.
Ls that near here?
Lsn't this amazing? Nothing ever happened to us.
Lt'll be rather difficult to do without the map, won't it?
Lyle is your communist, so go bother him. l don't care anymore.
Lyle Rogers. I'm his best friend.
Lyle, '' Dangerous Business'' is as good as anything they ever wrote.
Lyle, are you crazy?
Lyle, can you stand up a second? You're sitting on my tie.
Lyle, can you stand up a second? You're sitting on my tie. Then the tyre factory opened and overnight the population shot up about 35,000.
Lyle, do you mind? l kind of wanna be alone to think.
Lyle, get rid of the camel, let's get you out of the sun.
Lyle, go down to that truck and try to get us some water.
Lyle, I can't make anything work.
Lyle, listen to that hand! We're a hit!
Lyle, Lyle. Look. Look.
Lyle, put this over your face. Keep your head down.
Lyle, that chopper was looking for us. I'll bet you anything.
Lyle, Uh huh.
Lyle, we're almost broke.
Lyle, what do you say we get this show on the road?
Lyle, what is the big deal? Go on, you're just gonna ask for some water.
Lyle, why don't you sneak in here and talk to Siri.
Lyle, you can do it. Sing Simon & Garfunkel. You're a big talent.
Lyle, you gotta go to Marrakech without me.
Lyle! l won't call the police.
Lyle! ls it all right?
Lyle? Rogers? Yes.
Lyle.
Lyle. It's gonna be a scorcher.
Lyle. Lyle, are you sure it's safe to count on a lot of beads in the desert for a trail?
Lyle. Lyle, listen to me. She's not worth it.
Lyle. Yeah?
Make that two. Don't drink bourbon.
Marty Freed, independent agent.
Marty Freed, independent agent.
Marty Freed, our agent.
Marty Freed, our agent.
Marty. Marty, if we agree to your terms, will we get the map?
May I speak? Please.
Maybe I'll just go to sleep now, l don't know.
Maybe one day we will meet again.
Maybe something stronger?
Me too.
Mint tea? No, thanks.
Miss Assel is a left wing agent.
Mm hm.
Mm hm. That's how come we came to New York.
More! Encore!
Move! Move! You wanna get killed?
Mr. and Mrs. Charles Thomopoulos
Mr. Clarke? Take it easy.
Mr. Rogers, have you any idea how lucky this boy is?
Mr. Rogers, have you any idea how lucky this boy is? Lyle Rogers. I'm his best friend.
My car is parked at the other end of the medina.
My God. Oh, my God.
My hips are locked.
My life is nearly over
My life is nearly over And time goes by so fast
My lips are on fire.
My old friend. Good to see you.
My old friend. Good to see you. Jim Harrison. Ah, Your Excellency.
My uncle sells rugs in the next souk. l can get you a price.
Need a guide? I'm Abdul. Whatever you think it's worth.
Next, they will be hailed as the two messenger of God.
No children. No wife.
No kidding? Does the ClA know this?
No kidding. Nice jacket. Now, see, l'd look like a truck in that jacket.
No one No one even mentioned it during the auction.
No one's gonna measure whether the guy who shot them was 6 foot or 16!
No problem. Marty
No, but the beads on my necklace didn't shine. They're the ones that I dropped.
No, don't put your hands up, you idiot!
No, I didn't tell them about the suitcase.
No, I mean because I'm not the kind of guy that you thought I was.
No, I mean because I'm not the kind of guy that you thought I was. Are you disappointed in me? No.
No, I'm making a trail. That's what they do when they come out here.
No, it is better to kill two men than two hundred.
No, no, I mean, who were the Americans?
No, no, no, no! No, no, no! Not dead. Just resting!
No, no, no, no. At The Record Album?
No, no, no, you got that all wrong. Chuck bought that jacket. And he lost his passport.
No, no, no, you... Keep it. Go ahead.
No, no! This is it! Shh. Shh.
No, no. Just tell him l wanna buy a blind camel.
No, seriously, though, l hear there's an oasis
No, so help me, the lining of your jacket's a map.
No, thanks. I have a sister in the United States.
No, thanks. I'm gonna walk around for a while.
No, we can't stop now. We're gonna hit it any minute.
No! Above all, you must tell no one of this. No one.
No! Above all, you must tell no one of this. No one. Look, let me just check this out with someone.
No.
No. If two Americans die, it has to be unofficially.
No. it is terrible
No. No.
No. The camel's blind.
No. We've only known each other about five months.
Not even your wife. Oh, I'm not married.
Not me. Women don't like me.
Not now, Chuck. Not now. Not now.
Not on Friday and not in Ishtar. You're lucky the planes are flying.
Nothing, although I think it'd be a good idea to change your routine if they boo.
Now I'm gonna turn you over to the police, boy!
Now no one will find it...
Now say ''muck.'' Muck.
Now say ''sh'' and ''muck'' together real fast.
Now there's a guy who wants to kill us bad enough to drive across the desert.
Now we're gonna die in the desert shooting helicopters.
Now what?
Now, I didn't hit you hard because I'm bigger than you are, but don't try it again.
Now, these two men are my enemies, just as Libya is yours.
Now, we pay you 200 dirham for the job. 100 now and 100 later.
Now!
Of course.
Off to the land of the big sleep
Oh, boy, she must've gone through a lot if she found out about that wind.
Oh, boy.
Oh, Carol. Your life is a joke.
Oh, come on!
Oh, come on! Don't play sucker games with me!
Oh, don't be a fool. Please!
Oh, don't be silly. Lyle's not a communist. He's from the South.
Oh, don't go away! No!
Oh, gee, I wish there was something I could do.
Oh, gee.
Oh, God. I got a feeling something went wrong and now I own a blind camel.
Oh, heartbreak That's it. Do it again.
Oh, I don't know what to do now.
Oh, I'm from near there. You know Vermont?
Oh, I'm sorry.
Oh, is she the guy with your jacket and your passport that you told me you lost in Ishtar?
Oh, is that brilliant!
Oh, is that right!
Oh, is that true.
Oh, it's so demeaning.
Oh, it's so demeaning. l shouldn't have played in here. And time goes by so fast
Oh, Jim, get off this road. You're heading straight for wa wa land.
Oh, Lyle, don't scare me. You're all I have.
Oh, Lyle.
Oh, my God, Rabbi Pierce is here. Charles, you remember Rabbi Pierce.
Oh, my God, what have I done? l don't believe me!
Oh, my God!
Oh, my God! I don't believe this is happening.
Oh, my God! What?
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, no!
Oh, no!
Oh, no! Oh! Oh!
Oh, no. They don't seem to think so.
Oh, please.
Oh, please. I've got a helicopter waiting. May I speak briskly?
Oh, they say they could hardly believe their ears.
Oh, this is a joke. You think those guys are after us because they think I'm a spy, huh?
Oh, this son of a bitch! Now he's tired.
Oh, very good.
Oh, well, then the beads don't help. Oh.
Oh, what do you think l am, boy? A fool?

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