Lord of War (2005) Soundboard Edit

A used gun

A used gun.

After that comes vodka, caviar and suicidal novelists.

All right, let me see your papers.

Also referred to as blood diamonds,

Always ensure you have a foolproof way to get paid.

An elegantly simple nine pound amalgamation

And a student visa for the US. But that's another story.

And as far as she was concerned, loyal

And no condom within a hundred miles.

And when they came to America, their baggage came with them.

And write a bogus death certificate.

Andy?

Anywhere in the world that you're not on a first name basis with.

Are killed with assault rifles and small arms like yours.

Are you paying attention?

As far as they were concerned, I was giving arms dealers a bad name.

At the last minute, I bribed the crew for the paint job.

At the time, the West couldn't care less.

Ava wasn't looking anywhere but in my eyes.

Because everyone else is too busy killing each other.

Because I am.

Beware of the dog?

Both my sons are dead.

Bullets, guns, grenades!

Business is good.

But I prefer people to fire my guns and miss,

But I promise you,

But if you fight your biology you will always lose.

But in the '70s, to escape the Soviet Union our family pretended to be *******.

But the only problem with an honest buck is they're so hard to make.

But then they could hardly report me to the Better Business Bureau.

But they were too busy with the plane.

But unfortunately for you, I'm a necessary evil.

But you can definitely improve your odds.

But you can't just look at the unit price. You forget ancillary costs

Come here, come here

Come on, Nicki.

Come on. Guns, guns, guns! Yeah!

Could you help me out with some..

Curious how you always revert to your native tongue

Didn't mean they wouldn't make me a scapegoat the next.

Due to our present situation we are compelled

During the Cold War the Red Army stationed nearly one million troops

End user certificates need to be forged and notarized

Even if they're not men?

Even surpassed my lies

Even when I was up against an overzealous agent,

Every faction in Africa calls themselves by these noble names.

Everything goes for free

Except cuffs

For the first 20 odd years of my life,

Guns, grenades, RPGs,

Happy times. Come on. Help yourselves! No charge. Everything goes

Have you seen today's paper?

Hello, Mr. Yuri.

Here we go. Come on!

His seven year civil war has been described as,

How can we make you happy?

How do we arm the other 11?

How many cigarette salesmen?

I can always sense when I'm being tailed. I know what to look for.

I can't hold him forever.

I did have a natural instinct for smuggling contraband.

I didn't expect it to happen so soon

I don't want to be remembered at all. If I'm being remembered it means I'm dead.

I have failed at everything, Yuri.

I know you're planning a new offensive.

I mean,

I mean, there are more prestigious assignments

I nearly went broke trying to convince her I was anything but.

I never sold to Osama bin Laden.

I never want to say anything.

I routinely mislabeled my arms shipments farm machinery.

I thought you were supposed to be watching out for these people.

I told him to go have intercourse with himself

I understand that

I was born in Ukraine but I grew up in Brooklyn.

I was so caught up in the deal

I won't spend a single second in a courtroom.

I'd always wanted to do something big with my life.

I'm giving them away at $850.

I'm here, aren't I?

I'm putting us down

I'm sorry, I..

In a Bolivian boarding house.

In our own ways, we'd both conquered the world

In the hall there will be a man who outranks you.

Is that a four?

Is this one of yours?

It doesn't break, jam, or overheat.

It will shoot whether it's covered in mud or filled with sand.

It would be impossible for certain countries to conduct a respectable war.

It's in our nature.

It's lonely without you here.

It's not Lord of War. It's Warlord

It's probably just some reporters looking for somebody else

It's the older Chinese model.

Let me tell you what's gonna happen.

Liberation this, Patriotic that,

Like hide and seek?

Like most Ukrainians, we congregated in Brighton Beach.

Lord of War.

Luckily by the time we landed,

Maybe I never understood what was going on in his head.

Merry fucking Christmas!

Most of the deals were government to government.

Mostly, she seemed content that I was a good provider

Muzzle jump reduced 40%, 60% improved noise suppression

My father is easily offended.

My God, she nearly got her head cut off.

My uncle had turned down a half dozen rival arms dealers.

Netted me a healthy profit.

Nicki, stay right here.

No, no, put that away. Let's see your papers

No, V.

No, Vit!

Not a good time?

Not that day.

Now it's harder to determine which side one's on.

Of course, a new breed of gunrunner requires a new breed of cop.

Oh, I did lie about my name.

Oh, Jesus

Oh, the Cold War had its uses.

Or five minutes after.

Or maybe he was hoping the locals would tear me apart.

Personally, I blame MTV.

Personally, I do not recommend that.

Please

Please

Please stop.

Preferably in advance, ideally to an offshore account.

Reroute to Kabala airport on heading 0 2 9

Right, I've got 500 units, brand new

Right? It's nothing.

Said to contact you.

Say everything you want to say to me now. 'Cause you don't have long.

Say stop.

She doesn't have to know. She understands

Simeon!

Since you're so concerned with the law, you must know

So it appears.

So see you soon,

So, what do you want?

Some other time.

Someone will take my place the next day.

Something for Yuri.

Something in our weight class.

Sometimes I made the deals so convoluted,

Stop

Sure, Dad. A $40,000 crystal chandelier.

Ten thousand Kalashnikovs for a battalion.

Thank God we live in a world

That kind of sums up Andy for me.

That led us to the prize.

That was the day I realized my destiny lay in fulfilling another basic human need

That's gonna be closed any goddamn day.

That's one firearm for every 12 people on the planet.

That's Vitaly, my younger brother

That's why you're my brother.

The AK 47 assault rifle was the angel king.

The earliest human skeletons had spearheads in their ribcages.

The end of the line.

The Glock is interesting.

The gun of Rambo.

The latest was American educated self declared president,

The newspaper? It's always the same.

The next Sabbath, I went to temple with my father.

The point is, if I've done my job right,

The Soviets put the gun on a coin.

The way I looked at it, what's in a name?

Then what is it?

There are only two tragedies in life.

There was always some gangster getting whacked in my neighborhood,

There's no place in gunrunning for politics anymore, Simeon.

They don't deserve you.

Those nuclear missiles, they sit in their silos

To this day, I don't know what Vitaly was running away from.

We saw something in each other neither one of us liked

We will do this together.

We'd be happy to make you happy

Well, maybe not, but I understand you.

Well, that's best

Were procured from men exactly like your husband.

What have you got?

What if you're really just a two legged dog?

What the fuck use is that?

When both combatants proclaim themselves freedom fighters.

Whole tank divisions

With an unpaid army and stockpiles of guns

Yeah, go ahead.

Yeah, it's Yuri. Get that fucking rag down!

Yeah, we're... We're gonna get you home.

Yeah!

Yes, he does

You know what I do when I see that?

You know, they call me the Lord of War,

You need to see somebody.

You okay?

You should order more from the factory.

You take risks.

You'll probably threaten to resign.

You're high.

You've gotten so rich selling for the CIA

Your stocks are dangerously depleted, Dmitri.

Yuri, don't forget to check the specials at the Palace.

Yuri, I don't have Dutch.

Yuri, kouda prava, you're late.

Yuri, what the fuck do you know about guns?

Fuck you! Fuck you!

How many kilos would you like? 5,000.

I am the luckiest man alive. You are.

I'm on safari

I'm putting us down

It is delivered. This is not for me.

Nothing. I love you.

This is so wonderful

What is it? It's a mixture of cocaine

What is the hold up? There is no hold up. I'll be right there.

What was he doing here? He is hoping to beat your offer.

Where you going? As far from the evidence as we can get.