The Other Woman (2014) Soundboard Edit

Ah!

All right. Come on in

AMBER: Mark's an asshole!

And I get first dibs on what's in the bag.

And I hate that you keep saying it's dumb!

And I just wanted you to be happy.

And if I keep talking to myself...

And if you work it out, he's just going to do it again.

And she does nothing. Just lays around the house all day long

And then I started thinking that this

And what about meeting my dad?

Are the weirdest friends ever...

Are you okay?

As a blind woman to get upstairs.

Barb Melman got divorced and now she has..

Because I couldn't crack the code on his password.

Because it's not fair

Bitch.

But honestly, it's a lot worse.

CARLY: I don't think we should rush into anything

CARLY: If you weren't as disgusting as you were...

CARLY: It's really annoying.

CARLY: You're the wife! He's supposed to cheat on you!

Carly. Carmela. You're talking about Carmela.

Could you keep it down?

Dana!

Does this window open? (CLEARS THROAT)

Don't say it's a social call, because you

Excuse me.

FERNANDO: It's really nice, what you're doing for her.

Firing you is the least of it. The only reason you're not going to prison...

Forget what? Dinner with Phil.

Go out the window.

Half of everything he has

Have to be perfect. I like blue.

He said that..

He's going through so much with this divorce, and..

He's going to have to give this woman half his money

He's neck deep in fraud and if anything

Her bringing up the group average

Hey, buddy?

Hey. Hmm?

Hi, can I help you? I can help you!

Holy shit.

I can't even remember to shave my legs.

I can't wait for the site to go up.

I don't know what they told you

I don't want to keep explaining this. Carmela is Carly!

I have no friends to talk to because

I knew you'd love her!

I like sheer shirts.

I mean, has he ever said he loves you?

I miss you.

I missed you.

I shouldn't have told you. I'm sorry

I will.

I won't be back tomorrow night.

I'll call you when I get in.

I'll do it. If you do it, I do it.

I'll drive in to meet you in the city after your meeting!

I'll take one for the team.

I'm fine.

I'm looking for Mark.

I'm not a mistress

I'm pretty sure that's why he's still calling.

I'm sorry. I had no idea. I swear.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

If you want to have sex with your husband, do it

Is this some kind of stripper gram or something?

Is your shirt see through?

It was just a burp.

It's already hooked.

It's already in the air, guy.

It's pretty. You do?

Just promise when you meet her...

Just tell me the truth!

Just to let some steam out of the pot.

Kate might actually have a point about

Kate, wait.

KATE: Hey!

KATE: Okay, here's what happened.

KATE: Up high.

Kate!

Listen, Mark's shady. He finds out you have a lawyer,

MARK: Honestly, Katie...

MARK: I wish. What are you doing?

MARK: I'll get us some drinks. Scotch okay?

Maybe I can make it go away, huh?

Maybe you just have to forgive people to move forward.

Mmm hmm.

Mmm..

My friends are Mark's friends...

Need me to wait?

No one's going to jail.

No, you don't want to do that.

No!

Not a wife! (SIGHS)

Now I'm all worn in like an old glove

Oh! That was painful.

Oh.

Okay, but you're not going to like it

Okay, let's go

Okay.

Or did Big Pussy and Meadow miss you too much?

She makes me look like I'm wearing a diaper!

She's the perfect ten lemon tart...

Shut up!!

Since when do you smoke?

Since whenever I want to

So you haven't called him, full silent

So, how was the stalking?

So, um...

So, what happened to Model Man Boy and Dr. Not So Smart?

So...

Sorry. It's me. Don't be mad. I just...

Surprise!

Thank you!

Thank you!

Thanks, sweetie. (DOG BARKING)

That did not happen.

That's my money!

That's so awesome.

That's the best part of the house

That's your Evil Genius smile. Is somebody about to get screwed?

The housekeeper called.

The say the awful thing so that

There is no Clark Street.

Three punches.

Turn the car around!

Ugh!

Um, I found your number in my husband's phone.

We didn't? Oh, thank God

We thought you might say that. Then Carly explained...

We were going to hold off for prom, but we just got carried away.

We weren't happy. Now we are.

Well, Amber wins.

What a cute dress!

What am I supposed to do?

What are you doing? Seeing if Mark wants to hang out.

What is all this?

What is this? Why does it say zero?

What?

What? No. (LAUGHING) (MOUTHING) Go.

What's it called? No Hands. Isn't it great?

What's it like? Is it like a '70s situation?

What's that up there?

When you're divvying up friends in the divorce, keep this one

Where they give you exercises for your brain?

Who's Carly?

WOMAN 2: Milk? My husband prefers goat.

WOMAN 3: My husband likes a meaty sauce.

Wow.

Yeah

Yeah, I remember. Sorry about your urn. Why are you here?

Yeah, of course

Yeah, you said that.

You can tell me. I won't be mad.

You know how I told you to get your ducks in a row?

You mostly just yelled at me the whole time.

You okay with that?

You really like this guy, huh?

You sure?

You think he has more than one here?

You're not working with hypothetical Feds, are you?

...about it, I'm going to go crazy... for real. Like, really.

...and he had me believing you were the devil.

...and I've been so worried about him

...and it's been operating at a total loss in the Bahamas.

...But she's a good person

...but we just have that twinkle.

...did all the dirty work?

...got a worm that made his brain swell up super fast.

...it's not a mistake, honey. It's pathological.

...so it wouldn't die.

...then he comes to me, Oh, I have to go golfing.

...then let's take him down. We have him surrounded.

...to know where to place things

...who knows what's happening besides me!

...you know how Mark does everything, and Amber knows...

(ALARM RINGING)

(BOTH SIGH)

(CHOKING)

(CLEARS THROAT)

(ELEVATOR BELL DINGS)

(FARTING)

(GIGGLING)

(GROANS)

(GROANS)

(HORN HONKING)

(KEYBOARD CLACKING)

(LAUGHING)

(LAUGHING)

(LAUGHS)

(MUMBLING)

(PLAYING CALYPSO MUSIC)

(RATTLING)

(SIGHS)

(SIGHS)

(SIGHS)

(SIGHS)

(SIGHS)

(SOBBING)

(SOBBING)

(TIRES SCREECHING)

(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)

(WHISPERS) Thunder...