Duncanville (2020) - Season 2 Edit

A backyard screened‐in porch, and a big old candle.

A barbershop!

A bunch of angry witches that want to destroy our town.

A case of Annie fever.

A child can do for his father?

A community that's one dropout away

A day early.

A farmers' market in a good neighborhood.

A floor hole so you can see the street,

A full ride to Oakdale Community College,

A hydration station for the elderly.

A lifelong dream of owning a stuffed animal.

A lot more than shut off our water to break this family.

A novelty safari belt from his trip to Nigeria

A radiant, unhappily married she!

A regular Hank Williams.

A school drop‐off zone even more frustrating.

A shoe?

A toilet just took out a police helicopter.

A water retention spell on Samantha

A.H. speaking. Are you serious?

About parking enforcement protocols,

About shading in the whole bubble.

About something you didn't win fair and square.

About that. Let's hit some pins.

Across this obstacle‐filled trail.

Actually, a wave feels risky.

Actually, Dad, there is something I need to say.

Actually, Marcus, I think we've got it down.

Add a little apple cider vinegar,

Add a little plaque when you do.

After you sold my wedding cake

After your first kiss?

Again, not swingers.

Ah, great. Look, now I've done it.

Ah, I wish I knew what I was saying to you.

Ah!

Ah!

Ah! [laughs]

Ah! I'm 82 years old.

Ah! Ow, ow, ow!

Ah.

Ahh! I want my mama!

Ahh. ‐ Spicy.

Aka the hottest man alive.

All Huxter.

All I can do is turn the lights on and off.

All I need him to do now

All of it. We're perfect actors.

All our focus will be on you.

All right, bring it in, Plungers!

All right, let's see. Bird infestation.

All right, mayor coming through,

All right, well, have a good vacation!

All the kids have been asking about you doing a live set.

All we need now is a bonfire, and it's a perfect vacation.

All words that describe my wife, Annie Harris.

All: [cheer] ‐ Dad's back!

All: ♪ Buffalo gals

All: ♪ Don't worry ♪

All: ♪ I can finally put anything in my ♪

All: ♪ Killing me softly with his song ♪

All: ♪ Rock‐a‐bye Dunkie on the blacktop ♪

All: ♪ Shout

All: Aww!

All: Aww.

All: Aww.

All: Esaeler Eht Liveee.

All: Ew!

All: Huh?

All: Mama's Boy. Mama's Boy.

All: Mama's Boy. Mama's Boy. ‐ [groans]

All: Mm‐hmm.

All: Mm‐hmm.

All: Not it!

All: Not it!

All: Oh.

All: Oh. ‐ Hey.

All: Oh. ‐ It's beautiful.

All: Ooh!

All: Ta‐da!

All: We love Mom!

All: Welcome to the Legion of the Oaks!

All: What?

All: Whee!

All: Whoa!

All: Wow!

All: Yay! ‐ Aah!

All: Yeah! ‐ Yay!

Almost all week.

Also, everyone should know

Also, I need your credit card.

Also, what was the harsh version?

Am I a bird person?

Am I allowed to call adults by their first names now?

An adult drinking bagged milk on your lunch break.

An even bigger Huxter?

An old magazine.

And a couple of goals?

And a drawer full of freshly sharpened knives?

And a five‐year‐old can't compete with that.

And a ride on the Zip Line of Zuczess.

And a whole bunch of prenatal vitamins

And all you do is blame Santa.

And as someone born over 40 years ago,

And attention, I'll kill us all!

And bodies that stay buried.

And by "it," I mean your braces off.

And by freaking, I mean what you said.

And changing you, that was just to humiliate me?

And check out her RI. ‐ Her what?

And cooler shark tooth necklace.

And Def Leppard's drummer hasn't lost his arm yet.

And do‐dads and whatever hell broth is at the carnival,

And don't care what the kids think of you.

And don't give you credit.

And Duncan has to get to his test.

And enjoy The Scrambler.

And equality for women at the workplace.

And eventually love these birds like I do.

And gave him a machete, the judge made us turn it into

And get the Abraham Lincoln hat for Jing's school play.

And getting, you know, all of her reqs in order.

And give his body to someone who deserves it.

And give it whatever percent you feel comfortable with!

And gives me a little ba‐boom and a little ba‐bang.

And glazed with the tears of the innocent.

And good luck with that pancake proposal.

And good‐looking for that.

And have access to all the HP products that you want.

And have what you've got going on.

And have you seen my good nail gun?

And he has my wedding band.

And he needs you to watch his kids.

And he only gets paid for one.

And he thinks consonants are vowels.

And he wants to arm wrestle you.

And he's not even that hot.

And he's quitting to become a dentist,

And help Jing get in her car seat?

And his one‐eyed teddy bear and his baby teeth

And hopefully make up for that offensive joke

And how much you love him.

And how they go!

And I actually jumped so high yesterday

And I am quite the momager.

And I being race car drivers that I forgot to ask

And I can do anything a contractor does,

And I can make you one too.

And I do not want that for you.

And I feel like a musician again,

And I figured I owed her

And I got this zoomy‐digi camera

And I have a stash my kids don't know about!"

And I need somebody honest to watch my armored car

And I needed you to clean that dang attic.

And I promise you'll get used to this

And I spent it all on tickets to...

And I wanna give you a peak into my world.

And I want to be indoors.

And I was a nothing who ground bird beaks into dog food.

And I will be your amoral support.

And I'll be as gentle as I can.

And I'll turn to them and say, "It's Kimberly!

And I'm always talking you guys up.

And I'm gonna give him a‐‐ a bop on the nose.

And I'm never dancing on a desk again!

And I'm not sure I ever came down.

And I'm not winning the Oakie,

And I'm ready for my punishment.

And I'm really happy I did, too.

And I'm really sorry,

And I've never been more attracted to you.

And I've seen three movies!

And I've turned out great. [van door closes]

And if he had a problem with it, he would have told me.

And if I could help you not wind up like me,

And is just trying to buy you a darling top.

And is playing the villain in the next Spider‐Man movie.

And is that bucket in the corner what I think it's for?

And it comes out in weird ways.

And it needs to get a million views

And it's 11:00 a. m.

And it's not because there's pee

And Jing, your father's a middle‐aged man.

And let them think they murdered us.

And like the siege of Troy, our collapse is inevitable.

And look how he turned out.

And make more than a teacher.

And making those little free libraries with mystery books?

And maybe she gives me a kiss and we get married one day.

And me is gonna help you.

And murder.

And my job is to suffer so you can be happy.

And never speak to each other again.

And next thing I know, we're baking a cake

And no songs with the word "peanuts" in it

And nod supportively.

And not get in trouble. Watch.

And not thinking I'm laughing at you.

And not touch anything or say anything

And not worry about the cost...

And now a moment of silence

And now he has a cold sore?

And now he's mad! Run!

And now I don't feel so good.

And now I'd like to wrap up our ceremony

And now we have a lot of birds.

And now you're telling me you haven't even started?

And now, she can't smile or wear open‐toed shoes.

And now, to the closet.

And on break, I'm crapping in the teacher's toilet.

And on the way down, we are apologizing to Malala.

And only cares about boys who make her cry.

And only serial parking offender!

And pretending to breast‐feed him again!

And Prince, um, loving his guitar.

And raising your children without any thanks.

And read this incantation.

And replace it with "Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes."

And Sandra, you can find a better guy.

And say we're at Coachella.

And sell her witchy potions

And seriously, do not let the bedbugs bite.

And she doesn't need your validation to be happy.

And she only dances when she damn well feels like it.

And she's not impressed by size.

And show Mayor Jen she'll have to do

And start your mind.

And stealing pies off old ladies' windowsills.

And take this untouched veggie pizza

And tell your dad how sorry you are

And thank you for the barber recommendation.

And that bird seems to make her happy.

And that chair that rocks on its own.

And that Fun Size Snickers is mine.

And that's the Kansas City shuffle.

And that's why we have parents sign release forms.

And the "buzz"

And the breath mint I chew instead of brushing my teeth.

And the doctor said my ass isn't done growing!

And the hair from his first haircut.

And the hottest guy in my grade is right.

And the Powerball's up to 200 million, hint, hint.

And the truck nuts‐‐

And the winner of the Oakie Award

And then get a job

And then measuring said jealousy in likes and comments.

And then the girl tells her mom to shut up.

And then they left the hotel without being seen,

And these thought bubbles make me look dead.

And these three will ghost you

And they give him hugs.

And they make up their own rules.

And they're so judgmental.

And they're so sweet.

And this hot dog is dy‐no‐mite!

And this may never happen again.

And throw a tennis ball in the air.

And throwing beer cans at people.

And to keep my greasy fingernails out of it.

And to rub it in to my uneducated family's face.

And too nervous to show you guys.

And turned it into Kimberpalooza.

And we are pretty tight.

And we blame Santa way too much.

And we both have the summer off.

And we decided to let you join.

And we don't have time to call a contractor.

And we don't want to give 'em a bad name.

And we talked to Grandma on the Ouija board.

And we were the last ones to see them.

And we'd love to snap some twigs

And we're gone before the zucchini cake.

And we're never gonna be famous.

And we're right over the exhaust pipe,

And went to the arcade

And what a kiss!

And whatever Quibi was. Why are you watching

And when you're 40 and divorced,

And who knew I was so basic that I'd be attracted to it?

And who's waiting in a hard plastic chair?

And why did you buy Nick a toe ring?

And without you to tell me to stop car surfing

And working a part‐time job, he came to my work.

And write a song about me?

And you can have your birthday off.

And you can never go wrong

And you ruined it!

And you'd do anything for me, right?

And you'll only have each other.

And you're always disappointed.

And you're disgusting enough as it is!

And you're good to go.

And you're not just my campers.

And you're unfit to hold the office of high priestess.

And your boy does not brown bag it.

And your Dance of Devotion

And your thoughtful, last‐second gifts.

And, "Yo quiero that."

And, Dad, you're a junkie hit man.

And, well, it was wrong of me to try to punish you

And...

Annie Harris.

Annie, how could you not tell your own family?

Annie, relax.

Any boy‐girl party wouldn't be complete without.

Any fake thing you want.

Any luck job hunting, honey?

Anyway, I was so nervous about kissing your father

Anyway, we can't run this story.

Are any of these landing for you?

Are dead!

Are the one that made it.

Are two beautiful cautionary tales.

Are we doing this or what? ‐ Not yet.

Are you gonna be okay home alone

Aren't you, Dunker? ‐ Shut up!

As a mama I am so proud of my boy.

As a society.

As all mayors do, and you haven't busted anyone.

As an officer of the law,

As fulfilling as my job.

As long as we both shall live.

As old as Cwain and Abel.

As soon as I start to lose, call 911.

As soon as I'm done with my gig.

As soon as they find a boyfriend.

As we bow our heads for drinkable water

At my ex if he comes back for his power tools?

At the dog food factory.

At the Oakdale Kids' Soccer Tournament.

At you kids in my life.

Attention!

Aw, come on! Make with the rage!

Aw, look at you two, getting along like the Eilishes.

Aw, look how cute he used to be.

Aw, wait, there's a baby on it.

Aw! [whines]

Aww, come on.

Aww, he thinks I'm Cinderella.

Baby Duncan's in my tummy.

Ball!

Bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark.

Bark, bark.

Bathy, earsy, foldy. Happy?

Be amazed at what a teen in the First World doesn't know.

Be home by 9:00,

Be right back. [shouts]

Be the master's apprentice?

Beard's coming in nice.

Beatbox me, Jack.

Beautiful family, your own business,

Beautiful multi‐racial kids to visit you on set.

Beaver is nice to ladybug,

Because Dad needed a room for his scrapbooking.

Because he has something he wants to say to you.

Because her ankles‐‐ they look insane.

Because I didn't feel like paying for‐‐

Because I felt like we made a connection.

Because I have the key.

Because I'm at a music festival this weekend.

Because I'm immensely popular.

Because if he sees your butt,

Because it gave some men the wrong impression.

Because it's Friday the 13th with a full blood moon.

Because Jing can't do what Wonder Woman does.

Because next year you're welding this yourself.

Because she's allergic.

Because the Space Jammer seems to know so much

Because they feel they have to fix it.

Because they think that‐‐

Because we got free churros and Build‐A‐Broom.

Because your fontanelles never closed.

Before I can even talk to him.

Before I die.

Before she forgets all about me

Before you fell in love with plumbing.

Being the family of an Oakie winner,

Being with my family,

Besides my love.

Besides, we'll always be a team.

Bex, I want my night toast.

Bex, your bullhorn. ‐ Awesome.

Bid your friends farewell. ‐ Calm down.

Black on the outside, liquid on the inside.

Blippi the Clown, and Caspar Babypants.

Bloop, bloop...

Both aren't good. ‐ Honey, he's fine.

Both: [grunt] Damn it!

Both: [scream] Gordy!

Both: [together] ♪ Swing low

Both: [together] I was so close.

Both: [together] I'm telling Mom.

Both: ♪ Don't run in front of the ice cream truck ♪

Both: ♪ E‐I‐E‐I‐O

Both: ♪ He can't wait to pack those veggies in his bowl ♪

Both: ♪ The wheels on the bus go round and round ♪

Both: ♪ We love each other in every way ♪

Both: And Mia?

Both: Aww.

Both: Bleeding gums!

Both: Damn it!

Both: Do not check us out!

Both: Eight.

Both: Hmm...

Both: Middle school sucks.

Both: Mom! ‐ What?

Both: No!

Both: Sure, Mom.

Both: The adult pool.

Both: Um...

Both: We see you.

Both: Yes! ‐ Whoo‐hoo!

Bottom line is we were all in on it.

Bradley, how you doin', my man?

Bradley's bringing in a big seashell.

Break the power structure. Mom, you can solve that case.

Bring it in, you little nose‐pickers!

Brothers and sisters who get along all the time are gross.

Burn their bong, burn it all!

But "Men in Black 2" very much is.

But Amber's just using Ryan to make Daniel K. jealous.

But angry Mom is texting me.

But as your manager, I don't care if you get along.

But don't turn out the light.

But first, beer me and ginger beer him.

But first, you need to make a video

But he threatened to cut my head off.

But here's the twist. Daniel K.

But his car is spinning wildly out of control.

But I didn't have your guts, Duncan.

But I don't know.

But I don't see a problem keeping it on hold.

But I don't smell a charred body.

But I forgot my lunch.

But I get it.

But I had this idea for vaulted ceilings and‐‐

But I had to bunk with Duncan,

But I have a house full of birds that turned on me.

But I hit a groove, and we're good.

But I know that's not it!

But I know that's not it!

But I never thought I'd be trapped in a dead‐end marriage

But I still have braces.

But I still have to give you this.

But I think it's time to step in.

But I think you're extreme enough

But I took that vow, so here I am.

But I wanted to hang out with my cool big sister

But I was new to the force

But I wouldn't want to ruin a father/daughter memory

But I'll die for this sofa.

But I'm as mad as a March hare!

But I'm getting nervous holding it.

But I'm hungry.

But I'm not raising the next generation‐‐

But I'm not reading the questions.

But if we don't build a fire, we're gonna freeze to death.

But if you're just looking for a non‐tree place to live,

But in my own loving, supportive way?

But it itches and my doctor says it's not.

But it's just not as fulfilling.

But it's no time to get complacent.

But it's pretty big.

But it's time to fight feathers with bullets.

But keep trying to meet that impossible standard.

But lemon's a fruit. Wink.

But life's crazy, you know?

But look at all the smiling families

But maybe the doctor's wrong. Maybe it's just a pimple.

But Mom always says no?

But now look at us. We have a thing again.

But only if it feels safe.

But opossum is also nice to ladybug.

But peri‐menopausal.

But show me that you hear my prayer, and we're still good.

But so worth it.

But that's okay.

But the "Oakdale Bugle" sure does.

But the cart had a cupholder, so I chose the cart.

But the real thing is so satisfying.

But the spark just wasn't there.

But the townspeople don't want that.

But then I met the Tree Witch and she gave me magical powers.

But then I worried that that would reinforce the idea

But these birds bring me so much joy.

But they left their keys in it.

But they're actually just ways to keep you down.

But they're not send‐away awful.

But they've been here 50 years and they deliver and install.

But this blows.

But this year is different.

But voters can be fooled by that!

But way slower.

But we both know that's not true.

But we can do it in Dildo, Canada.

But we can pretend to get along.

But we do have a special assignment for you.

But we have to make your mother happy.

But we need to find the perfect place to display them.

But we showed them who the superior species is.

But we walked all the way here.

But we're over it.

But we've run out of things to talk about.

But what turned it around for you?

But what will people wanna punch?

But when my wife makes up her mind‐‐

But who's gonna take my place?

But with those Pad Boys, you seemed like a... kiss‐ass.

But without the pressure of trying to become rock stars.

But would that make her feel bad,

But you at least need to pass!

But you can have too many friends.

But you did the right thing for everyone but you.

But you did the wrong thing messing with parking.

But you don't have a white van, so hi, I'm Jing.

But you don't seem to have a love life.

But you don't want me as an enemy.

But you get it.

But you grow up, get married, have kids,

But you guys are clearly too smart

But you know what? I'll take it.

But you only fed one meter.

But you're a friggin' badass.

But you're just gonna wind up hanging us again.

But you're parked in front of a fire hydrant.

But you're so much better at public scenes

But your mom thinks school is important!

By a workshop I took at the Airport Radisson,

By an alcoholic with a chainsaw.

By bringing the Space Jammer to justice!

By creating traffic nightmares.

By letting them think we died so we get a free vacation.

By the end of the day.

By the power plant.

By your overzealous ticketing

By your own hair at midnight!

Bye‐bye.

Bye, dumbasses!

Bye! ‐ Jack!

C'mon, son. Give in

Caffeine up.

Called "Pediafile"

Came out of your mouth,

Can I have the last packet of crackers?

Can I say something else honest?

Can we see your dessert list?

Can we take a piece of trash?

Can you authorize the card for me?

Can you do it? all: Hell yeah.

Can't start the day without that.

Careful.

Carry me upstairs.

Carry us to vacation, baby!

Carve their initials in our butts.

Charge 'em up, and the company pays you.

Charging that in the outlet.

Chasing fame.

Check it out.

Cheerleaders: He's impressive.

Cherub's Nipple Pink or Bunnies' Blood Blue?

Chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp.

Chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp.

Claire's at Coachella

Cleopatra, take this to your brother.

Close enough.

Close to the back of Lennie's head."

Come inside. I'll make some coffee.

Come on, big D, branch it up.

Come on, Duncan, do something tight.

Come on, empowerment dance!

Come on, honey,

Come on, I'll give you a lift home.

Come on, it's a hot day. Let me give you some water.

Come on, Jack and the Die Youngs.

Come on, let's go in.

Come on, let's go post pictures of ourselves in floppy hats

Come on, show yourself, you son of a bitch.

Come on, we're going home.

Come on! Let's go make new friends.

Come on.

Complete the test by midnight,

Cool grass on a hot summer day!

Cool, a boob!

Cool. ‐ Yeah, retro.

Cooper just guessed triangle, and now he's a rock star.

Couldn't have screamed at those kids better myself.

Cover the entire Dojo District.

Crazy, crazy, crazy, crazy.

Croakdale High School, where dreams go to die.

Crotch chop alone.

Curse you, God!

Cussy McFoulmouth, but let me tell you

Dad, fire up the T‐T‐Twister.

Dad, you look weird. Love you. Bye!

Daddy will never let anything happen to you.

Daily spoon fight more than me.

Damn it.

Damn. Now it's stuck in my head.

Danced with Ellen on "The Ellen Show,"

Dang, my cheesy Chesney fries are mmm‐mmm good.

Dang. One.

Daryl Chrisakowsi,

Dead Elmo. Dead Elmo.

Did you know we have a store in town

Did you say okay? ‐ Yeah.

Did you take out the trash? ‐ No.

Directly before!

Dive! [tires squealing]

Do I look‐‐ who tucked my shirt in?

Do not die on me!

Do you have a straitjacket?

Do you have a Twister game, Bradley?

Do you hear that?

Do you still want to Peacock and chill?

Do you want to wind up like Stan?

Do your chores!

Do your dangerous, cute thing again.

Do‐‐uh, do you want me to tell you the story?

Does anybody in the audience have a quarter?

Does Santa know we're there? I'm so excited!

Doing the right thing. Teaching moment.

Dolphins: We love Mom.

Don't ask how I know.

Don't find yourself attracted to, what? Work?

Don't forget. I know how you are.

Don't just stand there.

Don't mind us. We just live here now.

Don't stop for that cat! [cat yowls]

Don't touch my computer.

Don't touch my makeup. Don't touch my phone.

Don't wait up! ‐ I could drive Duncan.

Don't worry about him. He's a pushover.

Don't worry, it's just my tears.

Don't you dare. You're allergic!

Don't you know how messed up this is?

Don't you like bowling anymore?

Dragged through the water?

Dreams do come true.

Dreams do come true.

Driving for lazy people,

Driving with my dad was terrifying.

Dumped down my back does feel good.

Duncan may never pass anything again,

Duncan, do you know how little work

Duncan, jump up and join us.

Duncan, she's not here. ‐ Number 46!

Duncan, we made our whole month.

Duncan's giant screwup has just opened

Duncan's impressive!

Duncan's struggling with basic vocab.

Each one of these losers is a vote.

Eat it. Swallow.

Eating tortellini with my husband's coworker.

Either that or‐‐oh wait, the rat ate my other theory.

Either way, Claire's dead, and it's on you.

Either way, his crab future's bright.

Emotion, corruption, kimonos.

Ends gun violence, and frees the nip.

Enjoy those little hot dogs. Keep on crockin'.

Enjoy your movie, sweetie.

Equal parts DayQuil and NyQuil, and a touch of Grammy's ashes.

Especially with my son.

Even if one of us dies in here, they cannot come in.

Even letting his dog lick his face for hours on end.

Even Mommy.

Even soup, dude.

Even the other characters' parts.

Even though your love life is a disaster.

Even when I didn't.

Even when they chase the hot nerdy boys away.

Ever since I cut my ponytail,

Ever since you cut your ponytail‐‐

Every actress in Tinseltown! ‐ Excuse me?

Every moment Duncan sits in that car with you

Everybody off the slide.

Everybody, pair up.

Everybody, pull!

Everyone can be bought.

Everyone counted but her.

Everyone got to have their solo day of fun, but fun's over.

Evil attic spirits, by the light of my sage

Ew! ‐ Yeah! It's against nature.

Ew.

Exaggerating our fun to make other families jealous!

Excellent!

Except for themselves. That's why they don't have any.

Excited to see you.

Excuse me, ma'am.

Extra tart lemonade, Mrs. Hanaway.

Falls behind in her work?

Family it runs in.

Family outing. Where do you wanna go?

Family photo, right now, before we're too sunburned to smile.

Famous Amos, and they're pummeled to crumbs.

Father, I love you!

Featuring Stroke‐a‐Cola,

Feel free to leave the net and join the rest of the team.

Figuratively.

Filled with untraceable gold.

Fine, but you don't get to see naked John and Yoko.

Fingers don't belong up noses, don't chew gum in Singapore,

First of all, you're here.

First one home gets to ground Kimberly.

First, I find out we're brothers.

Five, seven, five. Here you go!

Flip the rocker switches,

For a connection with my son

For an hour.

For at least ten minutes.

For at least the next two Saturdays.

For Civil Servant of the Year,

For drugs. Together.

For dumbass Douglas.

For me, it's reversing climate change

For my life's purpose and health insurance.

For my poorly‐received solo album.

For not abiding by the law?

For our depressingly unpopular daughter.

For saying what I never had the guts to say to my father!

For Shane's wife.

For Stroke‐a‐Cola Energy Drink,

For Stroke‐a‐Cola energy drink.

For Stroke‐a‐Cola energy drink.

For that subprime‐mortgage thing I got them into.

For the 24 Minutes of Oakdale.

For the fifth time.

For the first time, I practice‐kissed everything.

For the girl who ate half a pizza.

For the job every day like you did in the beginning.

For the kiddie swings?

For the last Go‐Gurt?

For the next whee‐k,

For the respectability I've always secretly craved?

For the rest of my life?

For the rest of these nutcases.

For throwing ribs on the floor.

For two days and one night to Flip Flops Resort.

For you to look like that.

For you, it's‐‐ well, it's that branch.

For your principles?

Form my own band, and‐‐

Freaking barbers!

Free movies, every Tuesday matinee.

From "Jurassic World."

From being named Travel Channel's dumbest town

From dunking a basketball all night...in a hoop.

From last year.

From that woman over there with no bra on.

From the Parks Department...

From the year so you can hang them up!

From whatever might be annoying you.

From you this year.

Froyo. Got it?

Fun are brain holes.

Gah!

Game of the District Messenger Boy.

Get a picture of all of us on a banana boat.

Get dressing rooms with no curtain gaps.

Get in there. Scramble it up.

Get out of my way.

Get out of that little house, Dad.

Get this to your grandpa soon.

Get your ass off our floor sample.

Get your medical kit!

Getting the respect she deserves.

Gimme, gimme, gimme.

Give it up for Jack and Jing!

Give me some.

Give me your pen.

Go back to sleep.

Go back to the docks!

Go for the ball! ‐ Huh huh.

Go to Mia's. I'll cover for you.

Go, go, go, go!

Go. ‐ Me?

God, we laugh together, don't we, Dunkie?

Going to summer school. You?

Gonna kill me a squirrel. [squirrel chitters]

Good hustle, Henley!

Good luck with your gas. Bye!

Good luck, my beautiful babies!

Good morning, everyone. [all hiss]

Good news, kids, you're getting desks.

Good night, Duncan. ‐ Night.

Goodbye, coaster.

Gopher bomb!

Gordy Hamilton discovered you could buy electronics

Gosh, that's funny!

Got frisky on the bed.

Got it.

Grabbed two shrimp in melted ice water.

Great goal, opposing team!

Great whistle, Ref!

Guess who's proud? Your mutter! Unh!

Gutter!

Ha‐ha, you'll never be warm.

Half cat, half pig,

Hang on little one, I'll help you.

Hang on!

Hang up and follow the smell

Hank Williams plays a guitar.

Happy Birthday shout‐out to Jayden,

Happy sailing, Dunker!

Harder!

Has a branch they're just trying to jump and reach.

Has completed his fitness test.

Hats off to that farting priest.

Haunted table. That's it! The King is back!

Have a look at this gal from last week.

Have a seed bell.

Have fun at your unsupervised party.

Have gone on to be state representatives.

Have the whole box.

Haven't you ever watched those ghost shows?

Hazelnut blend. ‐ Oh.

He could be helping her with her pre‐reqs,

He doesn't have to come home and drink an entire bottle

He even saved my life once,

He gives out giant checks and balloons,

He has to put up with.

He left this cryptic note on my desk.

He tells you his girlfriend's pregnant

He took a job across the street at Best Buy.

He wanted to get back together, but I wasn't interested.

He was my best friend.

He works three jobs at the school,

He's a sexual late bloomer.

He's always biting kids at recess.

He's always sayin', "Yo quiero this,"

He's as old as hell.

He's either making out or bleeding out.

He's fragile and sensitive.

He's freaking me out.

He's gone from rad to radicalized.

He's gone! [sobbing]

He's gonna be a rock star, and now he's a plumber.

He's gonna say it's friggin' awesome.

He's gonna strike

He's gonna try to mate with you.

He's got a better life than you.

He's outgrown me.

He's tormented this department for years

Head on a swivel. Check side, rear, front,

Heck, if I was you, I'd be telling me off right now.

Helen, I need to borrow your gun.

Helicopters, and cadaver dogs.

Hell, yeah, I'm so ready for this PSAT.

Hello, 1‐800‐FLOWERS?

Hello. Hello.

Help!

Help! ‐ Give me your hand!

Help! Help! I'm a lost child!

Hendrix burning his guitar,

Her curses are just spells,

Her! The winner!

Here I come, God, you coward!

Here we are‐‐

Here, rub some of these sugar cubes on your gums.

Here's all my artwork

Here's hoping.

Here's my original design.

Here's some song topics I'm kicking around:

Here's what happened:

Hex Claire! Hex everyone!

Hey, could you grab me some Funyun rings?

Hey, did you get my theory about fake handicap placards

Hey, do you mind if I lay low

Hey, don't forget,

Hey, girlfriend, me and my crew were talking

Hey, hottie. What's your name?

Hey, if you're ever in Oakdale‐‐

Hey, kids, you're smiling coyly today.

Hey, looks like your friend Cody is having a party.

Hey, Mia. Duncan still crushing on ya?

Hey, open fontanelles, huh?

Hey, Red, say something else dumb!

Hey, the houses in Knob Lick, Missouri, have good Zestimates.

Hey, you know what's also extreme?

Hey, you know what's more fun than stabbing?

Hey!

Hey! Hey! Hey! Don't make us turn this car around!

Hey.

Hi‐yah!

Hi, I'm Dirty Duncan Harris. When I have a big race,

Hiding their hatred for each other.

His family's gonna be so broke.

His meds are the only thing keeping him nice

His meds make him‐‐what the?

Hit the clutch, and throw it into first.

Hit the spot.

Hmm, hm.

Hmm?

Hmm.

Hmm.

Hmm. [gasps]

Hold hands, make a circle around me,

Hold on a sec.

Hoo. One.

Hosted by the great and powerful Mayor Jen.

How about you, lady?

How are you gonna break it to my parents?

How are you so well‐behaved?

How can I ever repay you?

How can we help?

How could you do this to me? I trusted you.

How did a stud and a filly like you get together?

How did it feel?

How do I compete?

How do we eat? Where do we sleep?

How many continents are there?

How to cope with their hormones.

How ya ma's, good?

How your little girl's room was coming along.

How'd you like to be a Pad Boy?

How'd you like to be the face

Huh!

Huh! Jing?

Huh?

Huh?

Huh?

Huh?

Huh?

Huh.

Huh.

Hup, hup!

Hup, hup! [grunting]

Hup, hup! [grunts]

Hurry up, get in. The race is gonna start.

Hydration station?

I accidentally learned about ancient Greece,

I am here to see Dick Harris.

I am so disappointed in you!

I am your father.

I am. Never mind.

I banish you to the neighbor's house!

I become a hellion.

I before E except after C...

I begged you to watch "Maury."

I believe in you, Duncan.

I believe in you.

I believe you have a banana boat

I bought for Kyle.

I brought this on myself.

I call everything something else.

I can ba‐boom and ba‐bang myself!

I can balance on one foot now.

I can do anything.

I can get a cow to do that.

I can read backwards. I do the word jumble every day.

I can see what you're wearing.

I can't host a middle school party.

I can't let you fly home like this.

I can't provide for all them kids.

I can't stop wetting myself!

I can't take a shower.

I can't wait to kiss you.

I could do any government job.

I could donate these coins to the homeless

I could finally take my girl to Solvang,

I did a great job watching Jing.

I did an improv!

I didn't charge you for the handful of Cheerios.

I didn't make you cool. You made me cool.

I didn't win this award.

I don't even recognize Kimberly anymore.

I don't get it, but let's go.

I don't have that kind of time.

I don't know, 200 bucks?

I don't know. ‐ Oh, no problem.

I don't know. Good luck.

I don't wanna always be the bad guy.

I don't wanna die in these shorts!

I don't wear my actual Daddy hat anymore

I even wrote a rap about it. [beatboxing]

I feel them all. [laughs]

I fired three producers,

I get it! Thanks, tiny Duncan.

I go like this.

I got you sponsored by a kids' health database

I gotta try on an anniversary gift

I guess one of us has to be the adult.

I had some theories on who it could be,

I had the handsomest, most talented kid

I hate my life!

I have a confession to make!

I have decided not to take the PSAT.

I have integrity.

I have Mille Bornes. ‐ Uh‐huh.

I have to answer it.

I have to get a picture.

I have to keep an eye on your sisters.

I have to know! Take my EpiPen.

I heard it ring. Didn't you hear it ring?

I heard they all designed their own apps.

I immediately play games on my phone.

I inspire the hatred of people and birds alike.

I just have to know what these little guys do

I just heard about Ticklepalooza!

I just need five minutes.

I just never want to talk to her again!

I just remembered he didn't kill himself.

I just said you weren't sexy to me.

I just thought you parked cars for a living.

I just want the best for you

I just wanted the mangley spoon,

I kill them, I pose them, and worst of all,

I knew I should'na let Ma trim my pomp.

I know a place so scary,

I know how much us being a team means to you.

I know I probably should have checked with you,

I know I'm supposed to use it as my pillow,

I know it feels really good right now...

I know it was hard, honey,

I know it's only Wednesday. I spent it.

I know nothing about being a parent,

I know you're not allowed to watch TV,

I know, an hour of acoustic Rush!

I know! We'll cook her an amazing meal!

I learned this control technique

I literally have nothing in the world

I live twenty minutes away! Come see me sometime.

I looked everywhere from Ballroom A

I lost my crockpot today.

I love being small.

I love him. I love him. I love him.

I love ya. I love ya. I love ya.

I love ya. I love ya. I love ya.

I love you, Kimberly!

I loved Maple Bar

I made a funny joke by accident.

I made a sacred vow to an energy drink sales rep.

I mean, hell yeah!

I mean, if you shake a bottle of water long enough,

I mean, we don't do crap around here,

I mean, we were so far behind when I jumped on the roof.

I mean, we're here. ‐ Annie,

I mean, who couldn't love this face?

I mean, you were partying with those college girls.

I might be hungry, but it looks like tortellini.

I might not have to go to summer school.

I need $200.

I need a little favor from you.

I need the police, SWAT Team,

I need to come out of my shell, but I can't.

I need to yell at your brother and sister.

I need you to try on your back to school summer clothes.

I needed to show you what life with no future looked like.

I never went.

I now present you with this certificate of Completion

I prefer a guy who's direct and honest.

I prefer games that challenge the mind.

I promise I will put you in a nicer home than that one.

I put a GPS tracker on his hoodie.

I put my hand on a "West Wing" box set.

I put the cart before the horse.

I ruined it?

I said "maybe."

I shot him in the leg,

I should be on that Space Jammer case.

I should go first! ‐ [gasps, growls]

I showed you about my life didn't influence your decision.

I still wanna have friends over.

I stole 'em from "Thunder Down Under."

I summon your help to guide me home

I swear if I could do it over, I'd take that stupid test.

I take Mia somewhere scary, protect her,

I think I can help.

I think I do better with supervision.

I think I put a heart on that post, mm‐hmm.

I think we all have concussions.

I thought I was dying alone.

I thought we were gonna be together for a few days.

I thought you were Duncan's youth pastor!

I thought you were falsely accused of being witches.

I told you, I am not that kind of coach.

I understand.

I use Photoshop. [crowd gasps]

I used to be a pyro.

I wanna be famous and kill Spider‐Man.

I wanna come back to school and have the guys go,

I want Duncan and Kimberly back!

I want people to be happy to see me.

I want to be like you.

I want us to order a crazy amount of room service

I wanted all the attention, and it was fun at first...

I wanted people to stop throwing soup on me.

I wanted to step in front of a speeding train,

I was just being cute.

I was just calling to see, um, if there's school today.

I was mad at Duncan for failing a test.

I was right about everything and not to betray me again?

I was supposed to take when I was pregnant with you.

I was talking to this trustworthy citizen.

I was tearing you down to build myself up.

I was the flight attendant. Nina was the air marshal.

I went up for the Christmas angel.

I will jump on whatever is next to me.

I will never have Harris rage! Never! Ahh!

I will not be taking questions at this time.

I wish we were related.

I won an award.

I won't stop for anything, not even lights.

I wonder if he still plays his little xylophone.

I would just hang out with my sister.

I would've killed for a room like this when I was your age.

I'd give you a hug, but you'd pickpocket me.

I'd take it right now if you could make 'em stop.

I'll be a good helper because when I mix potions,

I'll be Ambassador Tricia Wong.

I'll be coughing and nose‐whistling all day.

I'll be your plank!

I'll bet I can't get pregnant on the first time.

I'll get Jing.

I'll meet you at home later.

I'll more in with Kimberly till you're done.

I'll pack my things and go back to Dayton.

I'll put it under the sink with the others.

I'll send you and your family on an all‐expense‐paid trip

I'll shove you out wherever you want.

I'll show you my old crutches from when I did that backflip.

I'll take him straight to school.

I'll try to remember to send someone for your body.

I'll watch your kids for you.

I'm 42 years older. I should've been more mature.

I'm a busy, working mother.

I'm a stage manager, but I'm also a best friend.

I'm a totally different person.

I'm a valued part of this team.

I'm about to do something so dangerous,

I'm afraid you're looking at community service

I'm also a telephone psychic. [phone rings]

I'm an "obstute" observer of the human condition.

I'm Annie. ‐ [chirping]

I'm christening a new speed bump!

I'm Daryl Chrisakowsi,

I'm doomed. ‐ Yup.

I'm even gonna mark it on the family calendar nobody uses.

I'm getting out of here, man!

I'm glad you sent Duncan and Kimberly to jail.

I'm glad your teeth didn't tear out like that Reddit girl.

I'm going on my break.

I'm going to win show‐and‐tell tomorrow

I'm gone. [exhales deeply]

I'm gonna break the Internet and hopefully both my legs.

I'm gonna call him Princess Jing

I'm gonna get famous for eating the most hot dogs

I'm gonna get the respect I deserve

I'm gonna give you an amazing room makeover.

I'm gonna go buy some patchouli oil

I'm gonna go for 1,000 in a row.

I'm gonna go show my friends.

I'm gonna need a little something, something.

I'm gonna run behind this tree and watch.

I'm gonna run down the up escalator

I'm gonna send him one back.

I'm grabbing a frosty N‐Shure.

I'm juggling home and... [gasps]

I'm just fighting with a five‐year‐old.

I'm kidding.

I'm laughing at you for laughing with me

I'm like Tilda Swinton over here!

I'm Maury Povich, and I sold my journalistic soul years ago.

I'm meeting my friends at the fair.

I'm no longer mistaken for an alcoholic or a criminal.

I'm not good at knowing things. I'm a...

I'm not her keeper, okay? God, come on. Let's go.

I'm not sure we can get better than that.

I'm not wearing a suit, though. ‐ That's fine.

I'm okay! ‐ [groans]

I'm out of this dump.

I'm ready.

I'm running out of clean underpants.

I'm sensing a "paranormanal" feeling over there.

I'm so proud, I even wrote a rap about it.

I'm so sorry. I don't want to turn out like Uncle Stan.

I'm sorry. This really hurts my back.

I'm the father. [sobs]

I'm the father. I'm the father. I'm the father.

I'm weak. Worthless.

I'm wearing board shorts.

I'm worried that Duncan's falling behind in his work.

I'm writing a book about my life.

I've already written three songs

I've been following Mrs. John Legend.

I've got a gig.

I've never been on one.

I've never played for a sober crowd before.

I've still got your grandfather's Purple Heart

If he knows it, you win.

If I want to learn, I'll go to YouTube.

If I wanted someone to tell me I'm stupid on a Saturday,

If I'm ever allowed to have one.

If I'm gonna swear at my dad, I need my pump up music.

If it feels safe, give a wave.

If it gets too lonely in the goal,

If it's not there, it's not worth knowing.

If Jammer's gonna pull something,

If Mom finds out I told Jing to get lost and she did,

If my dad dies.

If she did that to her firstborn, who's next?

If she knew I lost you.

If she was jealous, she would've said something.

If that's what it took.

If they think we're getting along.

If they're here, bloated on shellfish.

If we don't bother them, they won't bother us.

If you can't swim, why were you pretending to be a lifeguard?

If you do it right,

If you get herpes, nobody will ever want to kiss you!

If you had just called in sick and watched "Maury"

If you wanna write loser on my forehead,

If you were just a little tougher on us.

If your back feels a little wet,

In a 60‐mile radius.

In a drawer that small.

In a little stunt I call...

In a miracle comeback finishes...sixth.

In America.

In case I was nominated.

In case you wanna use the radio.

In Civil Servitude...

In fact, I say burning women is wrong two times.

In four school plays, so let's do it.

In front of everyone in school!

In front of the whole school?

In his forties when his wife leaves him

In Margot's stupid finished basement

In my hands.

In that car accident when he was a child.

In that crockpot all night?

In the dress you picked out for me.

In the lucrative gig economy?

In the next 12 hours.

In this hair potion?

In under five minutes

Inside from the government.

Inspired by a teacher. Who could've figured?

Instagram is about creating jealousy through a fake life

Instead of just buying another backwards hat.

Instead of us playing video games while you run

Instead of working with your old man

Intercourse, Pennsylvania? [laughs] Nice.

Into a spot far from unmarked white vans.

Into betraying your core beliefs,

Into betraying your core beliefs.

Into doing something with her.

Into thinking they gave me pink eye.

Irving Nachumsohn. ‐ Of course!

Is a humiliating nightmare.

Is counting on us.

Is eating the watermelon I spent all summer growing

Is he your driver? ‐ Please say yes.

Is in love with Ryan. Your turn.

Is it the kid who came to our door selling seeds?

Is it?

Is it?

Is lick his fingers and split his eyebrows.

Is lots of water, but not too much water.

Is Mia hanging out with a guy?

Is Mr. Mitch.

Is no punishment.

Is that the last Babybel sharp original cheese?

Is that where you got that small Fiji water?

Is the ticket to the top.

Is there something you need to tell me?

Is to make sure nobody messes with it.

Isn't that the whole idea of kids' sports?

Isn't there a better name than Mama's Boy?

It ain't Witch Day till I'm chased

It explodes.

It had something to say about how we handle death

It is I, your Wiccan sister, Kimberly Harris.

It just feels so, so good when you can.

It just felt good to help you.

It just so happens I'm a Tree Witch,

It looks just like you, like you always look.

It looks like it's dripping in blood.

It really should go to Andre, the crime scene photographer.

It stunts your growth and curls your hands.

It symbolizes my rebellion.

It turns me on.

It was all moose.

It was exhausting being as popular as we were.

It was given to me to keep my mouth shut.

It was such a sweet story.

It will never be hidden under the sink!

It yelled, "I can't drive 55,

It'll be just like old times.

It'll blow your mind.

It's a clichéd story.

It's a kid's cup and I've got some overflow!

It's a lamp store now, but the vibe is still there.

It's a numbers game.

It's all about humiliating your opponent.

It's all crazy, and I'm, like, drama.

It's all the fun of speeding in a convertible,

It's always been you, mop girl.

It's because I'm getting my braces off.

It's been 400 years and this place still smells

It's between me and Samantha.

It's canine herpes. ‐ What?!

It's fries as an entrée day.

It's gonna happen someday.

It's gonna happen soon.

It's good to have everything back to normal.

It's got espresso beans to keep you awake,

It's in my blood.

It's just a stupid immature ritual

It's just Froyo, Kimberly. Just ask him to Froyo.

It's just so hard to tell with my clothes on.

It's kicking!

It's like knowing how to skip.

It's mail.

It's Mia. She wants to know if I'm up.

It's my badass cross to bear.

It's next week.

It's nice to see a woman

It's normal. He'll appreciate you again

It's not because a relative suddenly died.

It's not even good, but it's catching on.

It's okay if you freak out

It's one thing to do it on a cadaver car,

It's our victory party.

It's pejorative.

It's seven‐layer dip!

It's the day you get your braces off.

It's the funniest thing. It's so funny.

It's the other team's nap time!

It's their date night.

It's time to start enjoying this vacation as a family.

It's too hard.

It's Tuesday.

It's uncles who dress like sluts day.

It's very dry in here, so while you're taking your test,

It's what the doctor said not to do.

It's who you are on the inside.

It's your afternoon meet and greet.

It's your boy Yangzi streaming to you live

Itchy face‐raspberry.

Jack Harris, the lamest of all God's asses.

Jack, it's Rocktober!

Jack, reverse roundabout.

Jack, you take Duncan.

Jeez, Mr. H., whatchu think this is, Applebee's?

Jefferson Airplane. Jefferson Starship.

Jeremy, help! [coughs]

Jerry, the dancing crossing guard...

Jing, get out of my room.

Jing? Oh, crap.

Juice me. Leave the bottle.

Jumping up and hitting a branch?

Juries find me unlikable and your father talks too much.

Just forget it. ‐ Yeah, Bex.

Just go in and say, "Get your butt in the car,

Just kidding. [both laugh]

Just leave me on the side of the road

Just like he's outgrown this little hoodie

Just like we always talk about!

Just like your mother's and my active sex life.

Just means the moon's so close to the Earth,

Just not legally.

Just not with me.

Just picking up my sciatica medicine for my‐‐sciatica.

Just remember, you can't keep objects that big

Just the right amount to qualify

Just think of me as a big, beautiful,

Just this super dangerously caffeinated energy drink

Just to hear the hits?

Just trying to have a nice vacation...

Keep an eye on 17B.

Keep your arms and legs inside at all times

Kenneth Hanaway.

Kill them all.

Kimberly and her dumb coven can't do that.

Kimberly gets the mangley spoon.

Kimberly threw the greatest party of all time.

Kimberly, are you crying?

Kimberly, is that really you?

Kimberly, Marcus has brought you on the show today

Kimberly, watch Jing for an hour while we fulfill

Kind of like how you'd nibble my ponytail.

Kylie, Scott Disick, put him down.

Last time I saw him, he was doing a keg stand.

Last time I saw you, you were doing a keg stand!

Last time I saw you, you were doing a keg stand.

Last week, we died at this adorable ice hotel in Sweden.

Legend has it his spirit

Legend has it that's how Caspar Babypants

Let me see it. ‐ Mm.

Let's bounce. I will not be Blarted.

Let's build a rocket and see how fast it goes.

Let's discuss it on our way down the slide.

Let's finally have that lunch we keep saying we're gonna do.

Let's get 'em.

Let's get physical.

Let's get some Kenny Chesney cheesy fries.

Let's get this week started!

Let's go change the world.

Let's go get some sixth‐place pies.

Let's go have some unsupervised fun.

Let's go!

Let's go.

Let's hear you say that when you're strangled

Let's pretend we're pirates looking for pizza booty!

Let's roll, Mia.

Let's see if this does anything.

Let's see what a celebrity thinks.

Let's see.

Let's see. Warm ginger ale.

Let's start cleaning.

Let's take a quick vote for high priestess.

Light beer?! You pansy!

Like a dying caribou?

Like Beyoncé, Steve Jobs, Phil Spector?

Like Daddy's guitar. ‐ He's not mean.

Like Goody Bingham's crusty ass!

Like I said, none of this would have happened.

Like in cartoons. ‐ No!

Like Samson when he lost his ponytail.

Like that Publishers Clearing House dude.

Like, what's his name, Beckham!

Listen, you eat, like, every day, so we need cash.

Little sis to big sis. Thank you. Over.

Living on the road is so much cooler

Lodge presidents, sous‐chefs, senseis.

Look at me when I'm talking to you!

Look at what you've done to your father.

Look at you‐‐ the hats, the brooms.

Look at you, you're radiant!

Look away!

Look both ways, stay awake, keep your leg inside.

Look out! Reunited band coming through!

Look smart.

Look, your hashtag's already trending.

Looks like your parents didn't pay the water bill.

Lots of famous people did not go to college,

Ma'am? Ma'am?!

Macho Picchu.

Made for me last Mother's Day.

Mail should be in the mailbox. That's where it belongs.

Make me look completely unique and original.

Makes me feel alive.

Making out like idiots.

Mama's Boy. Mama's Boy.

Man, dying people have the life.

Man, that's good coffee, Mom.

Maple Bar, no! You were my maid of honor!

Marcus is about to get the rehearsal kiss of his life.

Mavis and I are going to get a couple's massage.

Maybe I won't go to hell.

Maybe it is the zoo. Is it?

Maybe it's time to call a contractor.

Maybe it's time we get out of racing.

Maybe you should just go!

Maybe you should live with Uncle Stan.

Maybe your spots are too small.

Mayor Jen is blackmailing me,

Mayor Jen owns our ass.

Mayor Jen. Your Grace.

Meer‐shwer‐hrr‐frow.

Meet me in the living room!

Meet me in the living room.

Mega Ball hit $60 million today.

Mi crib es su crib. [laughs]

Mia thinks your tractor's sexy.

Mia, another Sprite!

Mia, I'd like to put my arm around you.

Mia's Instagram showed her in her bedroom with a guy.

Michelle Obama!

Mike Love will get married again.

Mm, mm, mm, I've never been more disappointed as a teacher.

Mm? [giggles]

Mm.

Mm.

Mmm, still tastes like cocktail wieners.

Mmm. Tastes like Amurica.

Mom and Dad expect too much.

Mom‐‐mom‐man‐‐mom‐mana‐‐ ah, crap, I lost it.

Mom, Claire's lactose intolerant.

Mom, Dad, after much thought and soul searching,

Mom, make her give it to me.

Mom, you want in on this action?

Mom, you're a psycho who fed me rat poison every day,

Mommy said I have 15 minutes of screen time left.

Mommy, can you tie my ribbon?

Mommy, Kimberly and I both have fevers,

Mommy, protect me!

More than anything in the world.

Mother and son hangin' and bowlin' and‐‐Dunkie.

Mother will be pleased.

Mr. Mitch and I thought about what I said,

Mr. Mitch is too much of a softie to give out tickets.

Mrs. Snyder, I have a note for early dismissal at 11:00 a. m.

Music, toys, teen mags, toys, and I think books.

Must be nice.

Mwah! Mwah!

Mwah! Mwah!

My back is a mess from hanging on that hook for so long.

My braces are off, and my life is anew.

My chance to paint something fridge‐worthy!

My community service is over.

My crock!

My cute face puts butts on the grass.

My dad told my mom we took to the dump.

My elbow. An apple.

My girl's gonna love these bad boys.

My hammies are tight

My husband's kimono?

My mom got the same one at her self‐defense class.

My mom likes the attention when I get sick.

My naughty bumper stickers.

My no‐good brother Stan never went.

My old high school band has to be in here.

My old man's almost out of surgery,

My parents don't let me have a cell phone

My parents never drew the line for Stan,

My parents will be out of town again in six months.

My partner got hit! It's bad!

My pop's got two bills on the game.

My powers are too strong!

My public persona is all about rockin' hard and dying young.

My rock and roll persona scares some people.

My theory was it had to be a once‐gruntled,

My ulna!

My wife, Annie Harris.

Mysteriously on the front of my pants again.

Mystic Mitch. Whatcha wanna know?

Naomi's giving me my allowance tomorrow.

Nasty girl.

Neither did I.

Never mind. I'm good.

Next thing you know, you're being dragged out of Applebee's

Next up, lift half your body weight.

Next week, I'm postmaster general.

Nicely done, good listener.

Nick and Nina came back to their room...

Nick threw hot coffee in his face,

Nicko, when we first met six hours ago,

Nina, remind him. [laughs]

No one's dared to enter in years.

No one's gonna notice. ‐ Going to school

No plates, next to a fire hydrant,

No problem, just give it a little plumber's magic.

No question too easy.

No way. You can't Docker a rocker.

No, I pee out of that one.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no!

No, not him. Yeah, him.

No!

No!

Nobody come in my room!

Nobody's impressed, mister, nobody!

None of these moves are mine.

Nonregulation truck nuts?

Normally I'd try and butter you up to get you to buy it,

Normally, at our anniversary dinners you're so attentive.

Not bad.

Not have to go to summer school this year.

Not your good dad 'cause he's dead.

Nothing scary is happening and my lips are set to stun.

Nothing to see here.

Now disgruntled, employee.

Now go study so you don't end up

Now hurry up. It's cold, you idiot.

Now I have to ride around in this pathetic limo.

Now I'll never see a plant throw a rager!

Now I've gotta make out with Marcus

Now imagine the water's been running for 90 minutes.

Now let's go get our urine tested for drugs together.

Now let's win this thing. ‐ Mama's Boy!

Now take your well‐earned left turn and ease this baby

Now that your ponytail is gone,

Now, how should we kill him?

Now, let's go before anything can ruin my dreams for you.

Now, let's head to Macy's.

Now, you know the rule about parents, man.

Nudity, profanity, reckless driving!

Nuh‐uh! ‐ [gasps]

Oakie Award winner Annie Harris.

Of a company involved in three class action lawsuits?

Of a tire store after us.

Of all my sperm, I can't believe you

Of carrots and sugar cubes.

Of general chaos until the bell rings.

Of keeping the horse or taking a new electric cart.

Of our do‐gooder organization.

Of riding on an old‐timey fire truck in a parade.

Of the diarrhea song, but it works.

Of the hit song "Noodles and Butter"?

Of the moo goo gai pan was real.

Of the movie to go pee during.

Of the smokey cocktail wieners.

Of white wine to pretend his life doesn't suck.

Oh wait, I get it. It's mom and manager!

Oh, and also Malala.

Oh, and I just had to have this nose ring.

Oh, and Norman can't swim.

Oh, and we caught that rat!

Oh, and, Jack, here's your kimono tie.

Oh, but there's nowhere to lounge.

Oh, cool, but you should probably tell Dad.

Oh, crap. Now I'm running late for work.

Oh, hang on. I have a turtle in my pocket.

Oh, hey, Marcus. [meekly] It's me, Kimberly.

Oh, hot tiles, hot tiles!

Oh, I can't lie to you. It was in my pocket.

Oh, I get it.

Oh, I'm sorry, Duncan. This is Keg Stand Kenny.

Oh, Jackie, you'll do anything to feel loved.

Oh, make sure when you leave, you walk backwards,

Oh, man. This could be so good!

Oh, my God, we won. Thanks, Mom.

Oh, my God! Stephen King! You write books so good!

Oh, my God. ‐ Right?

Oh, my goodness!

Oh, never mind. I'll just stew in it.

Oh, no!

Oh, no.

Oh, our census taker's getting divorced.

Oh, she hung up. ‐ Jackpot!

Oh, sorry, I thought you were gonna throw that bowl at me.

Oh, take it! It's heavy!

Oh, the kids in Honduras.

Oh, there I go sharing too much again.

Oh, this is easy.

Oh, wait, I do see a problem.

Oh, wait, that's mine. [laughs]

Oh, we're doing this.

Oh, well. I'm eating for two.

Oh, yeah. That's what I like.

Oh, yes‐huh!

Oh! ‐ Ah, ugh!

Oh! It tastes bad! [door clicks]

Oh.

Oink‐meow, I told you.

Okay everyone, here's the scenario.

Okay to leave it here?

Okay, bye! [yells]

Okay, dairy‐free desert

Okay, get ready. [grunts]

Okay, I know I'm only Pagan when I need something,

Okay, I'll check in with you

Okay, I'm gonna hang up

Okay, I've been waiting 15 years

Okay, ready?

Okay, there's the bowling alley.

Okay, we 'bout to‐‐nope, one.

Okay, we got legs, goals, slices, black, white and grass.

Okay, who's up for "Secret Life of Pets"?

Okay, you're up.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. Be cool.

On a hot summer day.

On anyone who took their business elsewhere.

On getting your first Lip Smack from Mia at the carnival?

On Operation: Duncan's Dumb Decision.

On the internet and, blu‐blam, killed himself.

On the other hand, having sticky Gatorade

On the Space Jammer.

On top of clothes.

On you to call me on my crap.

On your own. ‐ Are you sure?

Once we're accepted as one of their own,

One day, your father and I will be gone

One minute you and Wayne promise the music

One rule!

One, one.

One, one. All right, you get it.

One. All right, now, one.

Only through.

Ooh, I'm feeling lightheaded just talking about ice cream.

Ooh, my special delivery.

Ooh! [growls]

Ooh! [growls]

Ooh! [growls]

Ooh! [growls]

Ooh! [growls]

Ooh! [growls]

Ooh! [growls]

Ooh! [growls]

Ooh! [growls]

Ooh! [growls]

Ooh! [growls]

Ooh. [growls]

Oops, sorry. ‐ Hm.

Or a conversion therapist at an antigay camp, or a‐‐

Or a racist vice‐principal,

Or as I call it, "spending." [chuckles]

Or as I called it, "money‐ker."

Or at least legend has it or whatever.

Or else she'll die.

Or else you won't bore people at my wedding.

Or I could break my neck, I could break my neck.

Or I might just stay here and rock out to some tunes.

Or I will put it there.

Or I'll blow us all to hell!

Or I'll put it there."

Or improve my cell service.

Or in a factory canning crab.

Or just to rev a motorcycle?

Or sometimes dance for.

Or you're never gonna graduate.

Organized sports is all about fresh air and having fun.

Our bodies just instinctively do it.

Our desks were next to each other.

Our eyes met and we've been inseparable ever since.

Our Saturday errands, we're gonna do 'em for you.

Our stimulus check finally arrived,

Out of a sacred native temple.

Out of her own toe bones.

Outside CrossFit gyms?

Ow, ow, ow, ow, hot zipper. Ow.

Ow, ow! Ow, ow!

Ow!

Papa Mom's Pizza gives me the fuel I need.

Parent teacher conference next week.

Parking scofflaws of Oakdale, beware.

Pays for our school lunch program,

Pee in plastic bottles.

Pejorative, a word expressing contempt or disapproval.

Pen in the pencil sharpener. [laughs]

People think they can just park wherever they want.

Perhaps true love?

Pick one, Jing. What's speaking to you?

Pitching pennies,

Please do not refuse.

Please exit through the back.

Please say yes. Please say yes.

Plus I was afraid he'd knock me through a window.

Plus, um, my brother's dying,

Plus, van sleep is good sleep.

Plus, you wouldn't believe some of the idiot kids

Ponytail Seabiscuit would kill for.

Probably filled with ill‐gotten jelly, pilfered cream,

Pulling Duncan and Kimberly apart before we eat!

Punish your son. ‐ Yeah, punish me, Dad.

Put this on. We've got a park bench to install.

Putting in speed bumps, planting community gardens,

Putting stuff together for lazy people.

Raise the kids with Huxter.

Ready.

Really feel like I crushed it today.

Really, Tylan? On my half birthday?

Red Lobster gift card coming your way.

Refresh‐‐damn. Refresh‐‐damn!

Remember all those nights I told you I was working late?

Remember how popular we were in high school?

Remember Nick and Nina from everything we did today?

Remove the boot, and I'll make sure

Remove the boot, or I'll make sure

Represented the guy's grief at the loss of his mother

Reserved for the Harris family.

Rev. Rev, rev. [coughing]

Rhonda will take care of you.

Riddle us another one, Jammie.

Right now, I'm wearing my Daddy hat.

Right, Annie?

Right, Mr. Mitch?

Rrrr! Whoo‐hoo!

Rules. ‐ I get it, Mom.

Run, my babies! Run!

Running down the up escalator.

Ruthie loved her puzzles. That was her name. Ruthie.

Sandra, don't do it!

Saturday, where did you come up with that?

Save it for when the truck's parked after.

Save Mommy and Daddy!

Save us!

Scooch over.

Screw nature!

Season three of "Chuck" on DVD.

See ya.

See you at the award show, Annie.

See you on the other side.

See? There's no reason

Senior VP of digital youth marketing

Senior VP of digital youth marketing

Shame on all of you!

Shame on you!

Shame on you! [all sigh]

She calls 'em curb pirates.

She didn't even take out the trash.

She doesn't know what days are.

She feeds me orange slices while I drive.

She has teeth!

She kills Nazis,

She says it makes me "sad and sleepy."

She should stay away from the empire waist.

She thinks Bernie Sanders is a fox.

She wants to make memories with our kids.

She would be devastated.

She'll be burning with #jealousy.

She's gonna find some way to blame me.

She's gonna flip.

She's got 12 million likes,

She's got to stop being so irresponsible.

She's home alone until they find them.

She's in pain.

She's just cranky 'cause she's been wearing

She's just wasting her summer.

She's like my sixth best friend.

She's nothing but fibs and lies!

Shoo! [bear huffs]

Shoot her!

Shoot me the link.

Shoot. One.

Should I betray the core of who I've always been

Showing she shops just like you do‐‐relatable.

Shut up, Gordy. ‐ [groans]

Shut up, ugly! He's coming!

Shut up. I'm hungry too.

Side, rear, front, side, rear, front...

Since last Saturday at the bookstore.

Since the day you were born.

Since the police chief faked his death

Sister sleepover.

Sitting. [chuckles]

Six times for this.

Slump over a little bit more.

Small‐talk Stacy from the DMV...

Smash that guitar over my head

Snap off one of my branches. Any branch.

So apparently part of my below‐minimum‐wage job now

So brave.

So follow your boy to the bowels of Circuit City.

So for the next week, let's just smile

So good to see you, son.

So he could marry Mia and that is exactly what we're gonna do.

So he went around kissing everything,

So he's throwing a rager.

So here's how we exploit it.

So how much did you win?

So I can finish your "Hector the Detector" tattoo.

So I can get your lips right up close.

So I can tell you to shut up.

So I guess I can support this.

So I should probably put some time in. Bye!

So instead, I'm gonna bribe you

So just want to tell him...

So let's make this the perfect family vacation.

So long, Annie's mascara.

So long, brats. Toot toot!

So maybe you'd want me to put my arm around you.

So non‐viral.

So now I'm eating your cousins.

So now you can sleep on Moana's boat

So now, you each have your own mangley spoon.

So sorry. Prepare to die!

So this is gonna blow your mind.

So we can't crap in it.

So we made out for a while,

So we're going bowling, 'cause that was always our thing.

So we're gonna be here late!

So we're gonna live at another place?

So we're gonna start by building a fire.

So we're staying home from school today, okay?

So what do girls do at sleepovers?

So what if you look like a mid‐level claims adjustor,

So you can pay for that college for the rest of your life.

So you knock his teeth out and say, "Fix those!"

So you're gonna have some pretty far‐out dreams.

So, Jing, what did you do today?

So, technically, this is Santa's fault.

Socrates posited‐‐

Some animals are just born rotten.

Some exotic birds are natural‐born mimics.

Some for me, some for you.

Some kids suck their thumbs.

Some kids wanna watch the world burn.

Somebody has to clean that up.

Somebody's been to Fort Lauderdale.

Someone whose family can be proud of them.

Something about not petting a dog you don't know.

Something smells good behind this door.

Sometimes grown‐ups have lifelong anger at lost dreams,

Sorry I took all week.

Sorry, did someone ask, "Why are you leaving early?"

Sorry, I just thought about Hector and the mail.

Sorry, you paid me to ask why you're leaving and I forgot.

Sorry.

Spending the town's emergency funds.

Spin. Power slam. ‐ Ow!

Sprite. ‐ Olive oil.

Stan?

Stand your ground, honey.

Start already.

Start with the Js.

Starting with T‐T‐Twister!

Stayed up for three weeks to write "Noodles and Butter."

Step aside. This is a job for the Jack man.

Step on my flat ass!

Step one, tie a T‐shirt around my head.

Step right up.

Step two, we form an alliance and drink each other's pee.

Still had two baby teeth!

Still wanders the aisles exacting revenge

Still, not swingers. [grunts]

Stole your grandma's meds, or just choked your stepdad

Stop acting weird and tell us where to go.

Stop being such a soft touch. ‐ Don't, Dad.

Stop looking for me?

Stop the presses!

Story they'll tell at my funeral.

Straight to bed. Now!

Suck my fumes, lady.

Super siblings!

Sure, 4 1/2‐year‐old me did, but that was months ago.

Swing me! both: Whee!

Taco truck? Crab legs truck? Tex‐Mex Mex‐Tex truck?

Take that, "Shut Up, Trish."

Take your hands off the wheel. Use your knees, damn it.

Talk to them. ‐ [growls]

Tara likes Ryan. But Ryan likes Amber.

Teachers: My car!

Teenage boys love to share.

Tell Duncan to do what I say.

Tell him what he's lost, Jack!

Tell me he's bustin' my basket.

Tell you what, you can fight all the way home.

Tell your friends, neighbors, coworkers,

Tell your mother to keep an eye on things.

Ten and two like the hands of a clock.

Than die alone five minutes from now!

Than gouge law‐abiding citizens

Than having to deal with school.

Than I pay my rent.

Than just a dumb, scary horror movie.

Than the family trip of a lifetime.

Thank you for your sacrifice.

Thank you, gentle beavers.

Thanks a lot, Aranyani.

Thanks for coming. I love being famous.

Thanks for seeing me.

Thanks for the wise but completely wrong advice.

Thanks for yelling at us, Daddy!

Thanks to the miracle of video check out.

Thanks, Mr. Mitch.

Thanks, voice inside my head

That ate a wheelbarrow full of hot dogs

That banana boat picture means the world to her.

That being said, I accidentally released

That changes a guy.

That checks wristbands.

That cloud is shaped like a dragon.

That crazed parking lady? ‐ [gasps]

That dog's probably dead.

That don't realize you just want what's best for them?

That gave all those test mice super diabetes.

That guy's in witch face!

That he's in charge, but you grabbed his power.

That I put my emotional needs ahead of what's best for him?

That is so thoughtful.

That little creep left me on "read."

That my doctor said I should stay on the ground.

That ponytail was who I am.

That pops up and says, "Moo."

That sells nothing but bird supplies?

That separates the alphas from the betas.

That she'll let us live here for years to come.

That somehow became a beloved family favorite.

That someone else isn't doing.

That spends most of the time attacking me.

That starts with the letter P?

That still has my coffee in it. [gasps]

That stops climate change,

That strange dude from that shady company

That teenagers can make money?

That tries to "make the town a better place."

That was an incredible montage of victories.

That we had to order for Claire.

That will leave a imprint of a elephant of your ass?

That women need a man to be happy.

That you act a little differently around

That, yeah, they could be jokes,

That's a weird place to keep it.

That's everything I forgot to bring.

That's for me, but you'll like it too.

That's friggin' awesome!

That's George, all right.

That's good, right?

That's it, burn their clothes,

That's just more satisfying.

That's just the way things are in an office, honey.

That's my sister.

That's Nick's toe ring. I'd recognize it anywhere.

That's noon in adult time.

That's not what Ponytail Jack would've said!

That's okay, it's more important you look good

That's pretty clever.

That's right, listen to Mama.

That's so sweet.

That's the festival that launched The Hooley Dooleys,

That's understandable. You can't have the passion

That's what you guys should be doing.

That's when I did it.

That's why I slow my heart down to one beat a minute.

That's why we pull it,

That's why you, a bird, are gonna take my place.

The AA meeting is down the hall.

The abomination that swept the nation.

The age of birds has begun.

The arcade and indoor trampoline wore me out.

The authority of a woman in pants.

The best example of that was your Uncle Stan.

The bonfire. The overpriced room service.

The bookstore has something for everyone.

The broken claw machine?

The Christian market is gonna eat you up.

The commercials look fun.

The day we sing together again is when heck freezes over.

The FBI found bones in my yard.

The girl you used to throw soup on!"

The green grass is where I'm found.

The green gummy bears backstage.

The Grinch's heart is filled with unwashed socks.

The hose is set to punishment, not fun.

The island is going to explode, but only one of you can escape.

The kids are growing up so fast.

The kids at school are calling me Trasherly.

The love of a sibling is one of life's treasured blessings.

The massage, the limbo contest, shopping‐‐

The master of the Wall of Sound...

The most loving, disgusting thing

The mouth that, up until last month,

The movies!

The music business is a cruel mistress.

The next time you see this girl, she'll be a woman.

The Oakie for Outstanding Achievement

The only energy drink that will stop your heart

The only thing that'll calm me down

The other has flint.

The people in this town count on me

The play sucks and is offensive to each of you individually.

The race has started. Vroom‐vroom already.

The same underwear for five days.

The sign says "For Talent Only."

The Space Jammer has struck for the eighth year in a row.

The Space Jammer is Oakdale's worst

The streets will run red with the ink of my fuzzy troll pen.

The sweat‐on‐my‐back‐ in‐your‐face pedi‐cab.

The sweaty guy in the tank top who keeps kissing his ball?

The terror I'm feeling.

The trash is really attracting rats.

The Tree Witch has to really like you.

The trick is, never wash the pot.

The window for us. ‐ The window?

The won't‐get‐you‐there‐in‐time pedi‐cab.

The wood's too wet. It won't light.

Then "Frozen" Monopoly‐‐

Then I thought space station, but I don't want her

Then I thought Wonder Woman,

Then point that wand and shoot.

Then set your lips to stun.

Then slow down and gently go over it to show its efficacy.

Then the night before your big break,

Then they called it off due to bad shellfish.

Then while we were pistol‐whipping him,

Then why do I feel so empty?

Then would I be tall enough?

Then you blow out your esophagus.

There goes my lunch with Annie.

There it goes. ‐ Come on.

There she is! I knew she was proud of me!

There were so many microaggressions.

There you go. Find a buddy.

There. ‐ [grunts]

There's a dented Honda Accord on fire.

There's a hole in my pajamas in a bad spot.

There's a lot more where that came from.

There's always people above you

There's gotta be something we can enjoy together.

There's just nobody out there with that million‐dollar smile!

There's no zipper. [laughter]

There's old flushy hands now.

There's one thing that I want you to know.

There's only one minute left in the game.

There's only one thing we can do.

There's perks for all of you:

There's Stouffer's in the freezer.

These are clearly the scrawls of a psycho.

These are the heroes that convinced me to pass up

They asked if you would please shut up.

They built the world's largest waterslide

They call pizza heart bombs.

They charge our card, and we're on the hook for it.

They compliment your ideas, take them,

They even gave us the yearbook cover.

They hate me.

They just left it natural. ‐ Nobody cut their cubes?

They just said "ta‐da"! Please don't throw us out!

They just trying to keep old people moist and all that.

They love my song.

They make you arrange their doughnuts,

They say if you listen close, you can still hear 'em scream.

They shouldn't do it that way.

They understand everything.

They walk around for an hour just saying,

They want you to play his birthday party."

They were driving kids' brains crazy.

They won't know what hit 'em.

They'd see she's a total pop.

They'll be gone all week!

They'll fly south in the winter.

They'll know where you're going.

They'll love my stuff when I'm dead.

They're always so happy to see me,

They're debuting a new kind of pipe.

They're gonna lose their minds.

They're not bloated on the bottom of the ocean

They're not just rip‐offs.

They're precious family memories.

They're the problem. Not us.

Think of it like four and one on a rotary phone.

Think of us as AirBuh‐nuh‐buh guests.

Think of what a lot of Stroke‐a and Dentos could do.

This ain't a selfie. Someone took it.

This award should really go to Small‐talk Stacy from the DMV.

This better be the summer nature kicks in

This face. Are you okay with this?

This goes way beyond your standard parking ticket.

This is a farmers' market, not a swap meet.

This is amazing shaved ice.

This is bottle flip.

This is the idea that could change the world.

This is what I used to do for your bottom.

This is what we're doing.

This isn't baseball.

This isn't my house.

This morning you had a color wheel.

This never happens.

This new one is above the water table.

This old‐school ponytail?

This pill for his back pain?

This seashell is from... Boca Raton?

This time, just try throwing it away.

This van is so cool.

This was a thriving hub for your electronic needs

This wet dream just got personal!

This?

Those are doubles we hire to attend all your school crap.

Those four gentlemen trying it out.

Thoughts?

Three, ya!

Three.

Through this harsh, harsh winter.

Time to go. ‐ Oh.

Tipped shades! He's interested.

To add your test to the family calendar?

To be liked than respected.

To be the new face of our fine product.

To buy classroom supplies.

To buy my grandma a new toaster.

To charge by tomorrow?

To Conference Room L.

To deal with my psychological issues would backfire?

To die like a caribou.

To do before you leave. ‐ Come on, Jack.

To get me to be politically active.

To get my first Lip Smack.

To get out of jury duty.

To go to college.

To inspire such cruelty in you?

To keep an eye on things, I'll go.

To keep our streets uncongested and running.

To live out of state. I'm in over my head.

To make a dam out of the soda bottles‐‐

To make his son cry?

To make that salesman an offer he can't refuse.

To make you think you're going bald.

To nearly kill ourselves.

To neighborhood block parties!

To practice the milk bottle toss.

To say something hateful to someone you love.

To say this to you, Kimberly.

To show everyone my beautiful, new smile.

To shut this party down.

To sit, we're a great team.

To solve your problems, so I'm actually going to help.

To the buffet!

To the couple in the banquet hall next door.

To the full‐blown Harris rage.

To the woman who loves you more than anything in the world

To wash your hands before going back to work,

Today I learned to throw shade,

Today, I put in a bench and gave a eulogy.

Told you he wasn't dead.

Tom Hanks or The Grinch?

Tom!

Tomorrow in class, I have to tell time.

Toneless arm around her and say,

Too bad I missed my chance.

Too bad your wife couldn't make it.

Tortellini... breastfeeding...

Toward the window so I have a good shot of both of you.

Truth and justice have to win.

Truth is, I miss trading verbal blows with you.

Turn around. ‐ No time. Got to go.

Turned out to be unlicensed, I screamed my butt off.

Turns out, I was just high from the glue fumes.

Two pencils‐‐one to write with, one to chew on‐‐

Ugh, are you writing a screenplay in Word?

Ugh, help!

Ugh, I hate being grounded.

Ugh, I think a piece of the devil got in me.

Ugh, if you ain't fast, you last.

Ugh, it wants to know if I'm a robot.

Ugh, what am I supposed to do for a week, Jack?

Ugh! The air is fresh!

Ugh.

Ugh.

Ugh.

Ugh. ‐ [sighs]

Ugh. ‐ You think she's tough?

Uh‐oh! This calls for teamwork!

Uh‐oh.

Uh‐oh. [all scream]

Uh‐oh. Parking bad guys.

Uh, carry the 12...

Uh, George Jetson.

Uh, yeah.

Uh! I'm laying into your nuts!

Um‐‐oh, God, I didn't finish!

Unanimous!

Under the blinking fluorescent light.

Under the stars at night.

Unhook Huxter and say your goodbyes

Unicorns obvi, but I wouldn't rule out rapping chipmunks.

Unionize now."

Unless you want to.

Unlike the grumps in this town.

Unlike the moon landing.

Until I say yes, right?

Until Mom comes to get you.

Until one day he introduces us to his otter family.

Until one day, I was given the choice

Until one night legend has it the assistant manager

Until some douches I sold fake Coachella tickets to

Use your signal and patiently wait your turn.

Used to carry old people to church,

Validation must come from within.

Van people don't live very long.

VH1's "Behind the Music" is on. ‐ Duncan's late.

Vote for my wife, Annie Harris.

Vote Jen.

Wait a minute.

Wait for it.

Wait for it.

Wait for it.

Wait for me.

Wait until they hear me tell my grandma to shut up.

Wait, don't tell Mom.

Wait, I said that wrong. No.

Wait, where are they, anyway?

Wait, you voted for me, right?

Wanna see my magic trick? You bet, Jing. Okay.

Was from me eating a whole mess of salty pork rinds.

Was just the right amount of sexual.

Watch with me.

Watching a beautiful sunset in matching outfits.

Wave the wand, and‐‐

We are here

We ate all that Chinese food together.

We call them The Pad Boys. They make the rules.

We can be a good team when we feel like it.

We can watch Peacock and chill. ‐ [gasps]

We can't all live together in harmony.

We did it, Grandpa!

We do not deserve tropical fun.

We don't have a vehicle. [bell dings]

We don't respond to words, we respond to tone.

We faked the whole thing!

We film us working together as a human otter society

We find an otter and gradually earn its trust

We get it, Claire.

We go home in a week anyway. ‐ Wrong, Overbite.

We got to get into the attic to get Jing's Abraham Lincoln hat.

We got to nip this in the bud.

We gotta find our way back to the main road.

We have 24 hours to do whatever we want

We have a very special guest on board,

We have concussions.

We have to fix it.

We haven't had a day alone together in 15 years.

We just got to come up with a good gimmick

We like that you're a soft touch.

We met in high school.

We need one of these, but big.

We need to buy a massage sofa.

We never had a night with nothing to do.

We over here making Jeremy Piven money.

We should make a band and be famous like you tried

We spent every minute together.

We will be sure to drink a silent toast to you.

We will pay anything for this sofa.

We wish witches and mortals could coexist peacefully.

We won't know until morning.

We wouldn't even be friends.

We'll be celebrities.

We'll do anything.

We'll start with "Harry Potter" Monopoly,

We're a sisterhood. Sisters have to stick together.

We're at 999,000.

We're breaking out the Martinelli's!

We're getting' hungry. Need protein.

We're goin' again!

We're going back to that barber,

We're going on strike.

We're gonna go get him.

We're gonna have to take our scams to the next level.

We're having breakfast.

We're having fun doing sister stuff.

We're here under false pretenses.

We're not supposed to tell our parents our deepest hurts

We're not swingers.

We're supposed to be the generation

We're unsupervised!

We're walking. We're walking.

We've been looking for.

We've got banana boat memories to make.

We've got one night to come up with a whole new act.

Well, don't you worry your sweet powdered bottom

Well, good night. Don't toss my body if I freeze.

Well, how would you describe it?

Well, I better go. I'm in a lot of pain.

Well, I've always fancied myself a girl boss.

Well, instead, I took our kitchen remodel money

Well, no thank‐‐ okay, I'll join.

Well, showtime!

Well, they have a gun now.

Whaa!

What a rush!

What a world. Even the dogs are shooting each other.

What are you doing on the side of the road

What are you doing?

What are you doing? ‐ Building a rocket.

What are you getting at, Mr. Mitch?

What could they be up to? We'll just have to find out.

What did I drink so much at the hydration station?

What do you have to say for yourself?

What do you know about dealing with ungrateful people

What do you mean you're not going?

What do you think groceries cost?

What do you think of that, ma'am?

What do you think, honey?

What do you think?

What do you wanna do next, honey?

What does it even mean? ‐ Yeah, totally.

What does it look like? What are you doing?

What else is Mom lying about?

What happened to "Family Feud?"

What happened to my water?

What happened to the haunted house?

What has 22 little legs, orange slices,

What has gotten into you?

What have we always wanted to do,

What is it?

What is wrong with you? [giggles]

What it would be like to live in a colorblind world.

What kind of future are you gonna have without college?

What sort of potion are you looking for today?

What the hell happened to you?

What the hell is this place?

What the? Kimberly, Jing!

What was I singing about? Oh, right.

What would Kenny Chesney do?

What you said to your dad. So where'd he hit you?

What you're about to see is totally real,

What? I'm going to the late service!

What'd you think of the hook?

What's going on?

What's next?

What's something that annoys her even more than us?

What's that in your hand? Is that a peanut?

What's wrong with you?!

Whatever you're running for, you got my vote, sir.

Whee!

When are you gonna be done with...

When Carrie goes back to her own planet.

When everyone just wants to drink?

When I come back, I won't be the same, so...

When I'm not around.

When I'm scared, I just lose control.

When our school did "Grease."

When the human's away, the pets will‐‐ah!

When the sun goes down.

When we're not invited to save face.

When will this ever end? [door clicks]

When you hear your punishment.

When you plate them and wash the plate after.

When you're in a less throw‐y mood.

When your diaper needed changing,

Where are my keys?

Where did his anger come from?

Where do you think you're going?

Where I can touch your brain?

Where they hung all those falsely accused witches.

Where to next?

Where was I? Oh, right. I'm telling ya,

Where were we, you son of a bitch?

Where you can fly, cackle,

Where, like, a mom is trying to buy her daughter a shirt,

Where's Kimberly?

Where's that damn nurse with my meds?

Where's the dry pee setting?

Whether you burned down a house,

Which is the cute name for the tree

Which means I get to be head coach

Which means I never really forgive.

While listening to the soothing jazz rock of Steely Dan.

Who are forced to love each other.

Who cares? ‐ Duncan!

Who get their braces off, their teeth come off with them.

Who goes in the boat?

Who isn't secretly a monster?

Who knew Jing and her pop were so friggin' talented?

Who knew there were so many ways to be

Who knew you had a rebellious side?

Who knows what path my newfound beauty will take me down?

Who made your mom do it?

Who put that target and tank of water here?

Who that guy was with Mia.

Who votes for me?

Who was the first president?

Who were you?

Who will help me clean?

Who would you rather be President?

Who's coming with me,

Who's gonna blow his wad losing a kid's game again,

Who's gonna fart and blame the dog?

Who's gonna speak too long at your wedding

Who's gonna watch my son?

Who's ready for their revenge body?

Who's ready to die?

Who's the hot guy that Mia's talking to?

Whoa, where'd I go? Man, this parsley hits.

Whoa!

Whoa.

Whoo‐hoo!

Whoo‐hoo! ‐ Whoa!

Whoo! ‐ Yeah!

Whose lap have I been sitting on?

Why are‐‐ ‐ Don't ask her!

Why aren't there any ways

Why aren't you making any sounds?

Why couldn't I have been born with deadly allergies?

Why do I pray? ‐ There's no need for prayer.

Why do they always make me bring my own table?

Why does the president care if I'm hot?

Why don't you come over tonight?

Why don't you come to work with me?

Why I'm wearing a whistle.

Why? Why?

Will always come first,

Will be cool with me coming over?

Winning Isn't Necessary!

With a little joke my mother told me.

With a troubled detective.

With coffee that's just...tawdry.

With dishing hot gossip or trashing good friends.

With Hector the Detector.

With my wife. ‐ Again?

With no eyes that stares at you?

With none of your friends speaking to you

With Shut Up, Trish, and Spider‐Man.

With some fake photos?

With the birthdays of everyone in the E Street Band.

With the wrong frosting on the inside?

With this sham, Jack.

With us today.

Without dunking the buns in water first.

Without dunking the buns in water?

Without my music, you're just a cute face

Without saying goodbye like they do on TV.

Wolf, swap seats with me.

Won't rest until we're dead!

Work it, Kimberly.

Would work together, but they do.

Wow, it's everything my allergist said.

Wrap a ring up in one of those skinny Danish pancakes‐‐

Yas, Kim!

Yeah, don't do that.

Yeah, I can see him too. ‐ Sup, Dunk?

Yeah, I don't sleep well if I don't yell myself out

Yeah, that's it! A medical professional is wrong,

Yeah, that's jazz, man.

Yeah, we know you're having block parties!

Yeah, you know you do. You want some.

Yeah, you'll get that promotion and find true love.

Yeah! ‐ Whoo‐hoo!

Yeah! ‐ Whoo!

Yes! I know how to use that.

Yes. Three.

You almost bumped that car full of nudists drinking hot tea.

You are still my little boy, now get your butt in the car,

You are taking that test so you can go to a good college

You are the coolest parents.

You backed over it with your Bonneville.

You came to work on a great day.

You can do this. [line rings]

You can get the "high" of respect

You can never have too many friends.

You can property my brother any time.

You can really feel the extra quarter‐inch legroom.

You can sit in this kiddie pool filled with squid.

You can turn it into a Spirit Halloween store.

You can use my referral code.

You can't look away for an hour and miss nothing.

You cannot fake love like that.

You did everything I said.

You did?

You didn't take the 12‐minute online course like we did.

You dig hair out of toilets. Hire a contractor.

You don't find yourself attracted to...

You don't have to become pals with everyone you meet.

You don't have to come up with elaborate schemes.

You don't own an elephant belt, do you?

You don't successfully complete the course, you don't go home.

You don't wanna have to catch up.

You don't write "tic‐tac‐toe board" anymore.

You get a lot of crazies.

You glowed up, too?

You gonna run home to your ukulele

You got carpeting on the ceiling,

You got me here under false pretenses.

You got our relaxed asses over a barrel.

You gotta redirect it and find something that gives you joy.

You hate when things slow your roll.

You have just the look for the lead in my play,

You have no power here!

You have some snot running into your mouth.

You have to do to get a grade this low?

You have to sleep in a cold van on a dangerous street.

You heard your mother...and me.

You just have a different way of thinking

You kids are gonna be rich and famous.

You killed him.

You know how to kiss, right?

You know I'm afraid of the dark.

You know me.

You know the deal, A‐Train. You set 'em up‐‐

You know what to do, Jack.

You know what? We've got to do something so great for her

You know, it really does look nicer in here.

You know, like, quit while we're solidly in the middle.

You know, maybe being without kids isn't so bad.

You know, siblings are just random people

You let us rattle the dead cage of Gordy.

You look radiant, and I'm sure Shane would say the same.

You make the same thing every night.

You may not have to go to summer school this year.

You might just get sponsored by Flat Tummy Tea.

You need to sit over there by that tree

You never win that Oakie.

You parked in the red zone, pally.

You pick up scooters with dead batteries,

You piece of trash!

You put your name first?

You ran across the Hot Coals of Communication...

You really know how to paint a woman.

You refuse? Sir, I'm begging you.

You rock!

You said I don't have "it."

You seem like a decent dude, and you said please.

You seem so happy. You know what?

You should be on

You should go to Dad's dumb thing.

You should let that go.

You stay home and relax with your feathered friend.

You still living in Illinois?

You struggled coming up with it.

You suck, moose!

You think I'm attractive, don't you, son?

You think I'm embarrassed to be seen with you.

You throw your scrawny,

You told at the bar last night.

You turned the whole town against me for me?

You two are booked solid.

You two need to take control of your lives.

You used to be about the sludge.

You wanna go look in the window where Tower Records used to be?

You want me to follow up?

You want to come over to my house?

You want to see something really cool?

You will guide your blindfolded partner

You win the Oakie Award.

You wouldn't think Tutti Frutti and Tiger's Blood

You, peanut girl.

You'll break your neck!

You'll ever see in your life,

You'll find the body in the old ravine.

You'll never look like me,

You're a hack, Jing!

You're a lot easier to work with than Wayne.

You're a pretty insightful young woman.

You're a respectable guy.

You're a respectable member of society now.

You're actually pretty easy to talk to.

You're being very cool today.

You're bound to nail a few guilty ones.

You're burning. And so am I.

You're clearly enjoying Duncan and Kimberly's

You're funny, and you smell good.

You're gonna be late for school.

You're gonna be stumbling around with toe‐teeth.

You're just in time to help us celebrate Duncan.

You're kind of a dummy, ain't you?

You're making a fool of yourself.

You're moving too fast for me! Zeb, wait up!

You're my everything, Grandma! You're my everything.

You're not sacrifice height.

You're our teacher.

You're playing Ticklepalooza.

You're screwing up our scam. [all gasp]

You're strong.

You're the best, Uncle Stan.

You're the best!

You're the children I couldn't biologically have.

You're up.

You've gotta be patient. He'll find his way back to you.

You've gotta go to the store and get sorbet

You've heard the expression. You know,

You've mentioned it often.

You've never seen me as Work Mom.

You've still got parade routes to mark!

Your boy Yangzi's a money god.

Your dad's not man enough. Why don't you tell me, Slumpy?

Your face? ‐ Possibly.

Your father's sanity, or winning a trophy?

Your friend May told me your boss keeps harassing you

Your Grampy stories are hilarious.

Your hair‐strangling spell!

Your husband works too hard

Your meat will nourish me

Your mom wants to ride a banana!

Your son did not kick my honor student's ass.

Your teeth don't come out with it.

Your truck is parked in two spots,

Yup. Yup. Yeah, it's a band thing.

Zestimates are lies that are dividing our country.

10 miles per hour toward the bump,

30 bucks for blank CDs? No wonder this place closed.

‐ Then we'll go to 108 K‐Jen.

‐

‐ 'Bout time.

‐ 'Cause I've watched every survival show!

‐ 'Sup? ‐ 'Sup?

‐ 'Tis without pee, Mum!

‐ "Eat it, LaDouche. Eat it. Swallow."

‐ "He brought the muzzle of it

‐ "Men in Black" isn't real.

‐ "Remove the boot. Love, your enemy."

‐ "Respectable"?

‐ "Shark Tank" makes being the kid entrepreneur look fun,

‐ "Trustworthy"?

‐ [annoyedly] Ta‐da.

‐ [as the Terminator] Pet me if you want to live.

‐ [barking]

‐ [barks]

‐ [bleep] you, Jack!

‐ [blows sharply]

‐ [burps] ‐ How much beer did you have?

‐ [chatters]

‐ [cheers] ‐ Mama!

‐ [chewing loudly]

‐ [chirping]

‐ [chirping]

‐ [chirping]

‐ [chirping]

‐ [chomps]

‐ [chuckles]

‐ [chuckles]

‐ [chuckles]

‐ [chuckles] Oh, Annie, you got played.

‐ [chuckles] We're not sea ghosts.

‐ [chuckles] What?

‐ [coughing]

‐ [crying] Y‐y‐y‐y‐yes.

‐ [deadpan] We're gonna die. ‐ If we die, we die together.

‐ [disappointed sigh]

‐ [distorted] I'm white and black and go round and round.

‐ [gasp] It's happening!

‐ [gasps hopefully]

‐ [gasps, chuckles]

‐ [gasps, panting]

‐ [gasps]

‐ [gasps]

‐ [gasps]

‐ [gasps]

‐ [gasps]

‐ [gasps]

‐ [gasps]

‐ [gasps]

‐ [gasps]

‐ [gasps]

‐ [gasps]

‐ [gasps]

‐ [gasps]

‐ [gasps] ‐ No!

‐ [gasps] ‐ Oh, can I keep it?

‐ [gasps] [ducks quacking]

‐ [gasps] 21 years?

‐ [gasps] A banana boat!

‐ [gasps] A proposal on "Maury."

‐ [gasps] Don't hurt them.

‐ [gasps] He's never called me

‐ [gasps] Hey, you know what?

‐ [gasps] I gotta get rid of my jerk parents.

‐ [gasps] I'll take it from here.

‐ [gasps] It's the Coding Boys.

‐ [gasps] It's working. They think it's winter.

‐ [gasps] Jack, look, its Huxter,

‐ [gasps] Locomotive Larry!

‐ [gasps] Look at this.

‐ [gasps] Me go there now fast.

‐ [gasps] Norman just sent me the cutest Boomerang!

‐ [gasps] Oh, my God, Jack, look.

‐ [gasps] Oh, my God!

‐ [gasps] Our what?

‐ [gasps] Ready!

‐ [gasps] There's Kimberly!

‐ [gasps] They all fell down!

‐ [gasps] Today's Little Stevie!

‐ [gasps] Tortellini... Eight years... dead end...

‐ [giggles]

‐ [giggles] Mail.

‐ [groaning]

‐ [groaning]

‐ [groans quietly]

‐ [groans sadly]

‐ [groans]

‐ [groans]

‐ [groans]

‐ [groans]

‐ [groans]

‐ [groans] ‐ Cover his face.

‐ [groans] Me no want test take.

‐ [groans] My spiney fluid!

‐ [growls]

‐ [growls]

‐ [growls] ‐ [screams]

‐ [growls] ‐ But yeah,

‐ [grumbles]

‐ [grumbles]

‐ [grumbling creepily] ‐ Oh, good one, Jensen.

‐ [grunt] Kick!

‐ [grunting]

‐ [grunting]

‐ [grunting]

‐ [grunting]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts]

‐ [grunts] ‐ [gags]

‐ [grunts] ‐ [strains, pants]

‐ [grunts] ‐ Eat Coppertone, bitch!

‐ [grunts] ‐ Ow!

‐ [grunts] ‐ Whoa.

‐ [grunts] [camera shutter snaps]

‐ [grunts] Easy money.

‐ [grunts] Go, Jing!

‐ [grunts] Going to Mia's‐‐bye!

‐ [grunts] I got mad ups.

‐ [grunts] My tibia!

‐ [grunts] Ooh, my L‐5!

‐ [grunts] What up, dumbasses?

‐ [gulps, then sighs] Okay.

‐ [gulps]

‐ [hisses] ‐ Language.

‐ [howls]

‐ [howls] ‐ Wolf, no car surfing!

‐ [hums]

‐ [hums]

‐ [imitates rock music playing]

‐ [imitates sirens wailing weakly]

‐ [in slow motion] Huh?

‐ [in slow motion] No!

‐ [inhales, gags]

‐ [inhales]

‐ [laughing]

‐ [laughs evilly]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs]

‐ [laughs] Faster!

‐ [laughs] It's funny 'cause the food was for his family.

‐ [laughs] Okay, I lied to you.

‐ [laughs] Steve's not gonna like this.

‐ [laughs] You're gonna have to draw it for me.

‐ [moans] ‐ [whimpers]

‐ [muffled scream]

‐ [munches loudly]

‐ [mutters] ‐ I'm sorry, what?

‐ [panting]

‐ [panting]

‐ [panting]

‐ [panting]

‐ [panting]

‐ [panting]

‐ [purring]

‐ [quickly] Okay, Kimberly. You've inspired us.

‐ [retches] I mailed in proofs of purchase for this!

‐ [sadly] My kids are growing up so fast.

‐ [scoffs] No, I'm not. You are.

‐ [screams shrilly]

‐ [screams, panting] Oh!

‐ [screams]

‐ [screams]

‐ [screams]

‐ [screams]

‐ [screams]

‐ [screams]

‐ [screams]

‐ [screams]

‐ [screams]

‐ [screams] ‐ Witches! We're witches!

‐ [screams] [both grunt]

‐ [screams] Forest dog!

‐ [screams] It burns!

‐ [shivering]

‐ [shouts]

‐ [shouts] ‐ One!

‐ [shrieks]

‐ [sighs contentedly]

‐ [sighs, grunts]

‐ [sighs]

‐ [sighs]

‐ [sighs]

‐ [sighs]

‐ [sighs]

‐ [sighs] I do kinda miss them.

‐ [sighs] Maybe she's writing it now.

‐ [sighs] Of course you are.

‐ [sighs] That's it.

‐ [sighs] The belt loop's fine.

‐ [sighs] The line is so long. [elevator bell dings]

‐ [sighs] Where's my damn award at?

‐ [sighs] Why aren't you in school?

‐ [sighs] Yes. Yes, I am. Nasty.

‐ [sighs] You just have one test you need to make up.

‐ [sighs] You're all right.

‐ [sing‐song] That's my‐‐okay, sorry.

‐ [sing‐song] Yes I am!

‐ [singsong] Somebody has a birthday!

‐ [slowly] Water.

‐ [slurping] Mom, would you like a victory sip?

‐ [slurps]

‐ [slurps] Mmm!

‐ [slurring] So my husband told me

‐ [smooching]

‐ [sniffles] Morning.

‐ [sniffs]

‐ [snores]

‐ [snoring]

‐ [snoring]

‐ [snoring]

‐ [snoring]

‐ [snorts] ‐ Snot rocket.

‐ [sobbing]

‐ [sobbing]

‐ [sobs]

‐ [somberly] ♪ Lalala ♪

‐ [squawking]

‐ [squawks]

‐ [squawks] [birds squawking]

‐ [squawks] [laughter]

‐ [squeaks]

‐ [squeals] [whistle blows]

‐ [straining]

‐ [strains] Duncan, no! She's not worth it!

‐ [strains] I'm not strong enough!

‐ [wailing] Rock and roll!

‐ [whimpering weakly]

‐ [whimpering]

‐ [whimpers]

‐ [whimpers]

‐ [whimpers] ‐ Mm‐mm.

‐ [whines]

‐ [whistles]

‐ [with Duncan's voice] That's kind of cool.

‐ [with Jack's voice] I'm so sorry.

‐ [with Jing's voice] I think it's beautiful.

‐ [with Kimberly's voice] Wait, they can sound like anybody?

‐ [wolf whistle]

‐ [yawns] Sorry.

‐ [yells and gibbers]

‐ [yells]

‐ [yells] Let me out, let me out!

‐ [yelps, pants]

‐ [yelps]

‐ [yelps]

‐ ♪ Ah, Papa's in the kitchen flippin' them pancakes ♪

‐ ♪ And have a mouth

‐ ♪ And I'm your bae

‐ ♪ Bath time just cannot be beat ♪

‐ ♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

‐ ♪ But I still can fly

‐ ♪ Gotta wash your stinky feet ♪

‐ ♪ Gran Torino ♪

‐ ♪ Gran Torino ♪

‐ ♪ I am Jing, game rigging ♪

‐ ♪ I can finally put anything in my mouth ♪

‐ ♪ I crashed my car into the bridge ♪

‐ ♪ I don't care

‐ ♪ I threw your [...] into a bag ♪

‐ ♪ I'm a savage, yeah

‐ ♪ I've waited for this moment for what feels like eternity ♪

‐ ♪ Instead of BS'ing me ♪

‐ ♪ Just yesterday

‐ ♪ Look at me, I'm Kimberly

‐ ♪ Love what you got under the hood ♪

‐ ♪ My life with a ponytail ends now ♪

‐ ♪ So do not try to fight us

‐ ♪ The babies on the bus go

‐ ♪ Train kept a‐rolling all night long ♪

‐ ♪ Usin' a washrag

‐ ♪ Wah wah wah, wah wah wah, wah wah wah ♪

‐ ♪ We're gonna have some old‐fashioned fun ♪

‐ ♪ Well, get along

‐ ♪ Who acts like a baby

‐ ♪ Who always calls me honey

‐ ♪ Who always calls me honey

‐ ♪ Who always makes me glad

‐ ♪ Who cries when she loses

‐ ♪ Who makes me feel glad

‐ ♪ Who's afraid of the dark

‐ ♪ Who's losing all his hair

‐ ♪ Whose nose is always runny ♪

‐ ♪ You are Jing, magic king ♪

‐ ♪ You should always brush all your teeth after meals ♪

‐ ♪ You're my shorty

‐ $5? That sucks.

‐ 10:00! ‐ There we go.

‐ 10:00. ‐ I can't hear you.

‐ 21, front butt! [both grunt]

‐ 38, 39, 40.

‐ 40 pounds? ‐ [grunts]

‐ 500...cents?

‐ A '57 Chevy massage sofa floor model!

‐ A bottle. ‐ For spinning...

‐ A good mother knows when it's time to let her son

‐ A magician never reveals her tricks.

‐ A stock car track. That's cool too, right?

‐ A viral stunt.

‐ A. H. E., an abbreviation for Annie Harris Entertainment.

‐ Absolutely it did.

‐ Absolutely!

‐ Absolutely.

‐ Achieving viral fame is a lot harder than it looks.

‐ Activate killer robotic dogs!

‐ Actually, 23 and me says I'm 1/16 witch.

‐ Actually, Dad, Jing and I knew.

‐ Actually, Mayor Jen sent me over to say...

‐ Actually, Mr. Mitch said

‐ Actually, they're out of town.

‐ Afraid so.

‐ After meals!

‐ Again? ‐ Flip the boat, Duncan!

‐ Ah, crap, it's a non‐sugar house.

‐ Ah, forget it.

‐ Ah, go down to the one in crayon!

‐ Ah, I can't believe you're unemployable.

‐ Ah, I get it. It's a retro party.

‐ Ah, I was jealous.

‐ Ah, if I'm gonna get through "Of Mice and Men,"

‐ Ah, Jack, she's your daughter.

‐ Ah, only good things will come of this.

‐ Ah, Phil.

‐ Ah, there's bae right there.

‐ Ah, traumatizing your kids‐‐ a Witch Day tradition.

‐ Ah, we're not done yet.

‐ Ah, well, we do it every once in a while.

‐ Ah, yes. I had fun too.

‐ Ah!

‐ Ah!

‐ Ah!

‐ Aha, look who wants to play!

‐ Ahh!

‐ Ahh! It's fun screaming with you.

‐ Ahh! Uh‐uh‐uh!

‐ Ahh.

‐ Ahh. ‐ What's wrong, Jing?

‐ Ahhh! Something popped in my chest again.

‐ Ahhhh!

‐ Ain't happenin'.

‐ Ain't my fault I got a big un.

‐ AirBnB. You're so embarrassing.

‐ Alexa, unplug Wi‐Fi.

‐ All men are my damage.

‐ All right, all right, I didn't take my test.

‐ All right, America and Spider‐Man director,

‐ All right, assistant coach Dunker.

‐ All right, but what am I gonna wave

‐ All right, I'll bite.

‐ All right, kids, everyone go home.

‐ All right, Kimberly. You got this.

‐ All right, listen up, dorks.

‐ All right, now push your face into that bread nice and slow.

‐ All right, Ron! ‐ Yeah!

‐ All right, students, take your seats.

‐ All right, what would 12‐year‐olds love?

‐ All right.

‐ All right. You got my d‐nuts?

‐ All righty, just got to make sure

‐ All righty, let's get those braces off.

‐ All righty, who likes games of personal sacrifice?

‐ Alliance over. You're on your own.

‐ Already pinned it to your T‐shirt.

‐ Am I trippin', or is that guy over there just a head?

‐ Am I? I don't think I am.

‐ Amazing. I got to stop funding these schools.

‐ An apology. ‐ Never.

‐ And a free sample of Pepcid AC.

‐ And all of these folks...

‐ And always will.

‐ And Annie Harris,

‐ And as a thank‐you, I brought doughnuts.

‐ And cut!

‐ And cut. Duncan, baby, beautiful.

‐ And did I mention

‐ And finally, the holy grail of motherhood:

‐ And finding an outfit is a breeze

‐ And he can only have

‐ And he doesn't have to soak in a bubble bath for an hour

‐ And he's a meanie! ‐ Oh, that is it.

‐ And her dad has a hookah!

‐ And his engine's on fire.

‐ And I appreciate that, but she did die.

‐ And I believe someone said rapping chipmunks.

‐ And I built you a unicorn dresser, obvi.

‐ And I had Wolf make a few changes to the car.

‐ And I immediately put it on their kiddie‐do list.

‐ And I just joined her Pedalton class.

‐ And I live in the basement!

‐ And I love her more than anything in the world.

‐ And I need Wi‐Fi so I can find out

‐ And I won an award.

‐ And I'm gonna spruce up my ravishing mane,

‐ And I'm never dressing Shane like a baby

‐ And I'm tired of being micro‐aggressed.

‐ And I've already got a crush on the boy

‐ And if I have one more second of your undivided love

‐ And it's where the Baby Shark kids were arrested.

‐ And Jack, Duncan and Jing are at the field!

‐ And let's not forget your dad and that damn guitar.

‐ And like all vacant retail spaces,

‐ And look at that shark tooth necklace.

‐ And my teacher won't stop calling on me.

‐ And none of the trees are cell towers!

‐ And now the moment you've waited five hours for,

‐ And now time to enjoy my post‐workout snack

‐ And remember to look sad. Can you do that?

‐ And she's doing computer bomb stuff!

‐ And team Mama's Boy

‐ And that one took my man.

‐ And that rack of Lego bricks was divine.

‐ And that was the worst day of my life.

‐ And that's a wrap

‐ And that's another 25 bucks.

‐ And that's why we don't talk to strangers.

‐ And the app also tells you what part

‐ And the brochure is glossy,

‐ And the nominees are

‐ And the one in your sock.

‐ And the one thing

‐ And the winner of this year's Oakie is...

‐ And to sweeten the deal,

‐ And to your right is Ol' Oakie,

‐ And unlike our old cemetery,

‐ And watch white people dance to reggae.

‐ And we owe it all to you, Mr. Mitch.

‐ And we put it on our Christmas list,

‐ And we're getting through it. [cell phone chimes]

‐ And what's my one rule?

‐ And when we have beers with the mayor,

‐ And who's the audience for this again?

‐ And you can ride dolphins to dinner.

‐ And you didn't even have to pay for it.

‐ And you haven't said anything about how I look

‐ And you knock 'em down!

‐ And you look like a guy

‐ And you're appropriating witch culture.

‐ And you're good. No toe bones for you.

‐ And you're the only one who ever reads

‐ And your hair is amazing.

‐ And, of course, "Super Mario" Monopoly.

‐ And?

‐ Andre, the artistic crime scene photographer...

‐ Annie, I need you back.

‐ Annie, if I die tonight,

‐ Annie, look at the pony he's rocking.

‐ Annie, please. ‐ Hey.

‐ Annie, take it from the neediest man alive.

‐ Annie, there has to be a better way to handle this.

‐ Annie, those commercials were 20 years ago.

‐ Annie, we need to talk about the birds.

‐ Annie!

‐ Annie!

‐ Annoy the crap out of them, instigate a violent brawl,

‐ Anything for you, Pop.

‐ Anything.

‐ Are hilarious. I know.

‐ Are those shot glasses from all the places you've been?

‐ Are we having sex?

‐ Are we moving at all?

‐ Are you criticizing me while I'm doing

‐ Are you gonna give me a ticket?

‐ Are you gonna start calling Mom "Mother"?

‐ Are you gonna talk this whole time?

‐ Are you insane?

‐ Are you kidding?

‐ Are you kidding?

‐ Are you suggesting...

‐ Are you sure your parents

‐ Argh! Is me pepperoni pizza ready yet?

‐ Arrange your own doughnuts, buy your own gifts,

‐ Arthur. Arthur lives in the basement.

‐ As a family!

‐ As a wife and mother, this destroys me,

‐ As in "Don't wind up like Uncle Stan"?

‐ As long as you keep losing it, we can't lose!

‐ Ask her. ‐ Okay, Jing.

‐ Ask my nitwit nephew anything.

‐ Au contraire, the test hasn't happened.

‐ Aw, $2,000 well spent!

‐ Aw, good for them.

‐ Aw, he wants us to get on. Do you think we should?

‐ Aw, Kimberly...

‐ Aw, man. ‐ What's wrong?

‐ Aw, who am I kiddin'?

‐ Aw, you guys did all this because I was upset?

‐ Aw! [both grunt]

‐ Aw. ‐ No, I'm kidding.

‐ Aw...

‐ Aww, it didn't work.

‐ Aww, my sweet boys.

‐ Aww, nuts.

‐ Aww, there's nothing to be afraid of, sweetie.

‐ Aww, well, I've learned that I need you, too,

‐ Aww, you gonna cry about it, rock star?

‐ Awww, spit that nasty stuff.

‐ Ba‐donk. Ba‐damn.

‐ Back up, everybody. Worldstar coming through.

‐ Bad news‐‐the teacher's bathroom is locked,

‐ Bam, shout‐out to my growth spurt.

‐ Be careful what you wish for.

‐ Be careful what you wish for.

‐ Be home by 10:00. What time?

‐ Because I respect you

‐ Because of you coddling these idiots,

‐ Because we're a community,

‐ Because you'll clog it up

‐ Benjamin Fwanklin?

‐ Besides, there's something about a 12‐year‐old girl

‐ Birds are really smart.

‐ Blegh.

‐ Blu‐ray director's cut of "The Secret Life of Pets."

‐ Boo.

‐ Booting a parking scofflaw is bound to get you votes

‐ Both of you, go to your rooms.

‐ Bow to your gods. Your wives are mine now.

‐ But all those kids were sitting in the classroom.

‐ But how are you gonna nap when you're it?

‐ But I love you. ‐ With Nick and Nina!

‐ But I wanna spend time with my friends.

‐ But I'll die.

‐ But I'm on vacation!

‐ But I've been dreaming about your first stage kiss

‐ But if you check us out,

‐ But Mom says when I get off my sleep schedule,

‐ But now they won't leave me alone!

‐ But seriously, folks, people tell me

‐ But the crowd loves it.

‐ But then we hit it off again

‐ But there is a way you can help.

‐ But they haven't completed their therapy.

‐ But they like me, and being liked

‐ But they're BOGO. ‐ Come on, Mom.

‐ But this is a cool barbershop.

‐ But this is even better than all those things.

‐ But we always tell her popularity doesn't matter.

‐ But we are lazy people.

‐ But we can khaki a Jackie.

‐ But what are we gonna do?

‐ But where are Nick and Nina?

‐ But who's gonna high‐five you

‐ But you can't get rid of the boot,

‐ But you didn't even let me audition.

‐ But you have terms, right, Mom?

‐ But you in that welding mask is so empowering, Mom.

‐ But you love this room. ‐ Sure, 4

‐ But you sat with us for hours.

‐ But you will.

‐ But you won!

‐ But you're not.

‐ But your car didn't have any plates,

‐ But your father. ‐ [chuckles]

‐ But your nightstand‐‐ why was it open?

‐ By the power invested in me,

‐ Bye.

‐ Call in sick, Mom. Watch "Maury."

‐ Can I ask you one thing, Nick?

‐ Can I be fake FBI?

‐ Can I breathe?

‐ Can I bring my bunny book? ‐ Sure.

‐ Can I go to Bradley's house? ‐ Sure, hop on.

‐ Can I have one? ‐ Yeah, sure.

‐ Can I interest you in a pedi‐cab ride?

‐ Can I mess with it? ‐ Yeah, sure.

‐ Can this day get any better?

‐ Can we go to the bookstore? My animal book is acting weird.

‐ Can we move to Pepperidge Farm?

‐ Can we stop and feed that old horse?

‐ Can you ever forgive us?

‐ Can't cry in those contacts. The blue is actually bleach.

‐ Can't we at least wait until the kids leave for college?

‐ Can't we just Aunt Becky our way out of this

‐ Can't we just play the hits?

‐ Can't we just scam a hotel?

‐ Can't you see I'm on the phone?

‐ Can't, no brakes.

‐ Candy.

‐ Catch me, Mommy!

‐ Chair.

‐ Chair. ‐ Chair.

‐ Change your old man's diaper.

‐ Check it again.

‐ Check it out. 30,000 square feet

‐ Check it, Mia.

‐ Children are like dogs.

‐ Chillax, baby, we got everything you need,

‐ Chilling.

‐ Chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp,

‐ Chrissy Teigen. ‐ Who?

‐ Claire, no, if your throat closes,

‐ Claire, we've gotta figure out a cool way

‐ Claire, you're my best friend

‐ Classic Stan. Good to see you, buddy.

‐ Clean your earsies? ‐ No, and I never will!

‐ Close the door, you psycho.

‐ Coach Daddy! Coach Daddy!

‐ Coach, can I talk to you?

‐ Cody's waiting for you at the make out closet.

‐ Collecting seashells? You bet ya.

‐ College is stupid.

‐ Come on, bro. You want back‐right seat?

‐ Come on, clock.

‐ Come on, come on. Come on!

‐ Come on, Duncan! Get him going!

‐ Come on, Duncan. Let's haul ass.

‐ Come on, Dunker. Let's blow this joint.

‐ Come on, guys, we need a viral video.

‐ Come on, honey.

‐ Come on, it'll be fun!

‐ Come on, Jack. Let's go find Huxter.

‐ Come on, Jack. We're going to Channel 10.

‐ Come on, Jing!

‐ Come on, son. You know this.

‐ Come on, take a sit.

‐ Come on, you dumb baby! Move your head!

‐ Come on. Let's hit the haunted house.

‐ Come on. One more. You can do it.

‐ Come out, come out, wherever you are!

‐ Come play with me, Jack.

‐ Coming up, Grandma.

‐ Congrats, Kimberly.

‐ Congratulations, Duncan and Kimberly only!

‐ Cool digs, daddy‐o.

‐ Cool party.

‐ Cool, more heat for me.

‐ Cool. I need to change into shorts.

‐ Cotton press? Active wear?

‐ Could you give us a second?

‐ Countdown checklist‐‐ steering?

‐ Crap, back to socks.

‐ Crap, I'm too short.

‐ Cupping for everyone, Tyler.

‐ Cupping? Isn't that where they‐‐

‐ Cut off his head

‐ Dad and Duncan made up. ‐ Aww, that's nice.

‐ Dad kept yelling at me in front of my friends.

‐ Dad, Dad, don't fall for his praise.

‐ Dad, how's my Witch Day booth coming along?

‐ Dad, those are for display only.

‐ Dad, we cannot lose this game!

‐ Dad, who invented the crockpot?

‐ Dad, will you sign my history test?

‐ Dad, you're supposed to take the peanuts out of the shell.

‐ Daddy, can you stop talking? I'm tired.

‐ Daddy, I'm ready to be tucked in.

‐ Daddy, we're a band! ‐ Let's chase fame!

‐ Daddy, you're a singer. You sing to me every night.

‐ Daddy! I'm scared of the dark!

‐ Damn it.

‐ Damn it. I knew I should've made a copy.

‐ Damn right, it's a retro party.

‐ Damn straight I'm a Big Boy.

‐ Damn, she got that off vert.

‐ Damn, this carnival got a lot scarier since we left.

‐ Damn, those Witch Day edibles are kicking in.

‐ Damn, your dad sounds like a good man.

‐ Damn!

‐ Damn.

‐ Dang, son, what's wrong with you?

‐ Dang, you serious?

‐ Deadbeat dads goin' 200 miles an hour?

‐ Did anybody else notice that?

‐ Did Gutter dance on a desk for your birthday?

‐ Did he say "unsupervised"?

‐ Did somebody yell buffet?

‐ Did something happen?

‐ Did you have that dream about the woman

‐ Did you hear that? He accepts us.

‐ Did you learn nothing from the seminar?

‐ Did you see him do it?

‐ Did your girlfriend finally say yes?

‐ Die! Die! Die!

‐ Disgraced Congressman Timothy Gerald.

‐ Do I still have a million‐dollar smile?

‐ Do it, Alexa.

‐ Do it, Dad. End his old ass.

‐ Do me a favor. Put it under the heat lamp.

‐ Do we like each other?

‐ Do you have something for an upset stomach?

‐ Do you hear that?

‐ Do you know any real people? ‐ I know you,

‐ Do you think people go see the Stones

‐ Does nobody at home listen to my work stories?

‐ Don't blame yourself.

‐ Don't care. Slide. Sharks. Sunburn.

‐ Don't do anything crazy while we're gone!

‐ Don't even put it in her head!

‐ Don't feel bad, Mrs. Harris. I've never heard of it either.

‐ Don't laugh with me! ‐ I'm not laughing with you.

‐ Don't let him get in your head like he does every year.

‐ Don't let the ponytail fool you.

‐ Don't look at me, freak!

‐ Don't make us go!

‐ Don't pressure me. I just announced.

‐ Don't tell me what an homage is!

‐ Don't tell me what to do!

‐ Don't thank me. Thank the laminate machine.

‐ Don't use your blinker.

‐ Don't worry. It's permanent.

‐ Don't you have anything better to do

‐ Doug, I tripped on your giant underwear again!

‐ Dracarys. [fire whooshes]

‐ Drag him out, Mom, but cheat yourself

‐ Draw and quarter his ass.

‐ Drawer's all fixed, ma'am. You can finally close it.

‐ Drive.

‐ Drivers, start your engines.

‐ Dude, what are you doing?

‐ Dude, your pants have metal on 'em.

‐ Duncan and Annie,

‐ Duncan come crawling home yet and realize

‐ Duncan Harris,

‐ Duncan Harris, I am your father!

‐ Duncan hates being called Mama's Boy.

‐ Duncan made his choice. We like living here.

‐ Duncan needs me!

‐ Duncan, all a father has is the false belief

‐ Duncan, are you really sure you wanna do this?

‐ Duncan, clean that up. ‐ Yes, sir.

‐ Duncan, don't say that out loud.

‐ Duncan, everyone in their life

‐ Duncan, good news.

‐ Duncan, how do you feel about duping chumps?

‐ Duncan, how many fingers am I holding up?

‐ Duncan, how was your vacation?

‐ Duncan, I brought your lunch.

‐ Duncan, I can make a quarter disappear, watch.

‐ Duncan, I just read in the school paper

‐ Duncan, I saved you a seat

‐ Duncan, I'm scared, and I can use an arm around me.

‐ Duncan, if you wanna put your arm around me,

‐ Duncan, leg! ‐ Hm?

‐ Duncan, let me sunscreen your shoulders.

‐ Duncan, there you are.

‐ Duncan, Thor is in the living room,

‐ Duncan, train! ‐ Yeah, kept a‐rolling!

‐ Duncan, were those corn flakes

‐ Duncan, when you said it to me,

‐ Duncan, where are you?

‐ Duncan, you are out past curfew.

‐ Duncan, you excited for the PSAT?

‐ Duncan, you selfishly destroyed my chair.

‐ Duncan, your nose is bleeding.

‐ Duncan, your window's open.

‐ Duncan! ‐ Duncan!

‐ Duncan! ‐ Duncan!

‐ Duncan! ‐ Duncan!

‐ Duncan! ‐ Duncan!

‐ Duncan! ‐ Duncan!

‐ Duncan! ‐ Duncan!

‐ Duncan! ‐ Duncan!

‐ Duncan! ‐ Duncan!

‐ Duncan! ‐ Duncan!

‐ Duncan! ‐ Duncan!

‐ Duncan! ‐ Duncan!

‐ Duncan! ‐ I'm sorry.

‐ Duncan! Kimberly!

‐ Duncan! Kimberly!

‐ Duncan? What the hell are you doing?

‐ Duncan. ‐ Duncan.

‐ Duncan's mom?

‐ Dunkie, I got you a PSAT study book.

‐ Dunkie, I put together a PSAT care package for you.

‐ Dunkie, pay attention!

‐ Dunkie, we're a hit.

‐ Dunkie, you would be the first one in our family

‐ Dunkie's cuter. ‐ Ugh.

‐ Eat Coppertone, bitch!

‐ Eat my bumper!

‐ Either I'm drunk, or that can's tweeting.

‐ Enjoy Florida.

‐ Enjoy the rest of English class, Marcus.

‐ Enjoy your summer, Harris family.

‐ Even Indianapolis?

‐ Every Friday's pizza night because Mommy's too damn tired.

‐ Every kid in town.

‐ Everybody up. We're getting out of the house.

‐ Everybody?

‐ Everyone calm down.

‐ Everyone can be bought,

‐ Everyone get behind me.

‐ Everyone in this town sucks and treats me like crap.

‐ Everyone loves a cocky winner.

‐ Everyone off the channel and go to bed. Over.

‐ Everything okay, honey?

‐ Everything's moving normally. Guess I was wrong.

‐ Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew. ‐ God, stop.

‐ Ew! This pizza's hot and fresh!

‐ Ewwww! Mommm!

‐ Exactly like Jay Leno.

‐ Excuse me, sir, can I have your seat for my award?

‐ Excuse me, sir, I have to use the bathroom

‐ Excuse me? ‐ That was my car you booted.

‐ Ey, check out the "boids" on that broad.

‐ Eye on the ball, Jackie!

‐ Eyy foccacia! Coach is disappointed in us!

‐ F‐‐

‐ Fake high. Go low, Dunkie.

‐ Family discord.

‐ Family vacation?

‐ Fasten those safety bars.

‐ Faster, bitch!

‐ Faster, Dunkie. Swift and crazy wins the race.

‐ Feed the horsey.

‐ Fill in for me at my anniversary dinner

‐ Finally. Duncan, assemble.

‐ Fine by me. ‐ Love it.

‐ Fine, here.

‐ Fine, I don't want his book to bomb.

‐ Fine, I'll do it, but we go in separate cars.

‐ Fine, I'll take the test,

‐ Fine! When I get home,

‐ Fine.

‐ Fine. Everybody.

‐ Fine. I'll go.

‐ Finish? Augh.

‐ First aid kit? ‐ Yup.

‐ First of all, women do need a man to be happy.

‐ First strut as a hot girl.

‐ Fitness test?

‐ Five days? You broke my record.

‐ Flair lifeguarding.

‐ Flat on your back, feet on the ground.

‐ Flip Flops?

‐ Fold your jammies? ‐ No.

‐ Follow me.

‐ Food boob. ‐ It's called breastfeeding.

‐ Fools, don't you know bullets only make witches stronger?

‐ For the love of God, somebody flip me!

‐ For tomorrow, Jing, we're thinking Monopoly marathon.

‐ For what, honey?

‐ Forget all that crap. We're racin' now.

‐ Forget it. I'm not walking that far.

‐ Forward, big brother!

‐ Four more balls, please.

‐ Free vacay, baby.

‐ Friends come and go. Sisters are forever.

‐ Froyo. Got it.

‐ Geeks are the new rock stars.

‐ Get 'em out of here! all: Boo!

‐ Get a grip, pigtails.

‐ Get away from my Gran Torino, punks!

‐ Get back in the car!

‐ Get in the car, Annie, I just saw a moose eating a man.

‐ Get in the car, Duncan. ‐ But my shoulders.

‐ Get in the car.

‐ Get in. all: Okay.

‐ Get me close.

‐ Get off my back, Carrie. I'm the king of Queens.

‐ Get off our backs, Malala.

‐ Get off the zoo, Mom!

‐ Get on, Harrises.

‐ Get out there and give this town

‐ Get that muffler fixed, you noisy jerk. Ugh!

‐ Get your pedi‐cab.

‐ Get your untanned butts over here!

‐ Getting my college pre‐reqs out of the way.

‐ Gimme! ‐ Thanks, sucker!

‐ Girl, I think I love you.

‐ Girl, that's not what I heard. Over.

‐ Girl, you need to swim the hell away from my bar.

‐ Girls and nightstands. Am I right, partner?

‐ Girls, get off that horse! It's dangerous!

‐ Give it up for Team Mama's Boy.

‐ Go back to Germany with your white‐collar criminal husband!

‐ Go get 'em, Dunkie.

‐ Go to hell, Maury.

‐ Go with your friends and celebrate, Duncan.

‐ God is good. God is good.

‐ God, I love this you.

‐ God, it's only 11:00? Fine, go.

‐ God, no.

‐ Good luck, honey.

‐ Good morning, Reggie.

‐ Good morning.

‐ Good night, honey.

‐ Good night, my principled princess.

‐ Good set. Did you not see the light?

‐ Good, 'cause there's gonna be ten of 'em. Thanks, Mom.

‐ Good! [both grunt]

‐ Good. Ever since I cut my ponytail, what?

‐ Goodbye, future!

‐ Gophers took our house.

‐ Got one! Two clicks to your left.

‐ Got the seafood tower!

‐ Gotcha.

‐ Gotta end sometime, right?

‐ Gotta get ready for my first kiss.

‐ Great idea!

‐ Great job, everybody. Whoo!

‐ Great, now I got to deal with Marvin's stuff.

‐ Great, who was that guy? ‐ What guy?

‐ Guess what?

‐ Guess your party fun is all dried up.

‐ Guys, get off channel one. It's for me and Mom. Over.

‐ Guys, what are we doing with our lives?

‐ Hands up. Pool party enforcement.

‐ Hang on, let me just take a look at my paystub. Yes.

‐ Happy birthday Gutter! Unh!

‐ Harris family, get out here.

‐ Hate to do this to you, Coach Walters,

‐ Have I been so blinded by my desire

‐ Have you considered participating

‐ Have you heard something?

‐ He didn't. ‐ Not even with his hand?

‐ He does like bowling.

‐ He finished his test and it's one minute till midnight.

‐ He got roof.

‐ He is surprisingly excited about that.

‐ He looks great for 82. ‐ I like this show.

‐ He looks nice.

‐ He played that damn thing so well,

‐ He said I'm the best. That's a verbal hug.

‐ He wanted to take me out for drinks tomorrow.

‐ He's a bad husband, but an amazing father.

‐ He's a mean, old man who thinks it's fun

‐ He's gone, man. He's gone.

‐ He's gotta be around here somewhere.

‐ He's learned nothing. Duncan crossed a line.

‐ He's picking out my gray hairs.

‐ He's right, Dad.

‐ He's so beautiful.

‐ He's yelling. Look at my foot!

‐ Heads up, everybody. The Space Jammer is back!

‐ Heads‐up, do not order the cheesy‐filled crust.

‐ Heavens no.

‐ Heck of a disappointed sigh, Jing.

‐ Heh, clever.

‐ Hell no, you'll meet me now in here and also at home

‐ Hell yeah, I do. What are they, Kimberly?

‐ Hell yeah! Let's go do that.

‐ Hell yeah.

‐ Hello, Oakdale! Good to be back.

‐ Help yourself, Lil Joey. Anything for my stans.

‐ Help! Help! ‐ [screams]

‐ Henley, look at you working those brittle vegan bones!

‐ Here we go. ‐ Let's fire this baby up!

‐ Here we go. ‐ Lock and load that F‐bomb.

‐ Here, try this. ‐ Is that a clump of my hair?

‐ Here's an iPad. Entertain yourselves.

‐ Here's everything I confiscated

‐ Hers is more mangled! ‐ The hell you say!

‐ Hey Duncan, wanna remodel Jing's room with me?

‐ Hey there, honey.

‐ Hey, are those my dad's Steely Dan albums?

‐ Hey, Ashley, it's Duncan Harris.

‐ Hey, can you get a picture of us?

‐ Hey, Dad, too bad your guitar's in the shop.

‐ Hey, Duncan,

‐ Hey, Duncan, I brought our ten

‐ Hey, Duncan, you remember Kimberly?

‐ Hey, Duncan's family. What's up?

‐ Hey, Duncan's friends.

‐ Hey, Duncan's hotheaded mom.

‐ Hey, guys! What are you doing here?

‐ Hey, hey, nobody wants to hear a teacher rap.

‐ Hey, how's your summer going?

‐ Hey, I blocked you once.

‐ Hey, I hope all the cool things

‐ Hey, I know!

‐ Hey, it says on Reddit that half the people

‐ Hey, Jing, as members of the Jing Ring,

‐ Hey, Jing!

‐ Hey, kid, think your dad still wants

‐ Hey, kid, would you mind giving your grandfather

‐ Hey, kiddo, can I tuck ya in?

‐ Hey, let's use that old hot water heater

‐ Hey, look at me. I'm a businessman.

‐ Hey, look who's here, Jack.

‐ Hey, Marcus. It's Kim...berly.

‐ Hey, Mom, someone left you a Valentime's.

‐ Hey, Mrs. H. ‐ Oh, hi, Bex.

‐ Hey, my leg's goin' all scungilli over here!

‐ Hey, my tours are donation only.

‐ Hey, sis. What's up?

‐ Hey, soup‐‐sup?

‐ Hey, take me to Taco Bell and I'll give ya a kiss.

‐ Hey, that's great!

‐ Hey, they just said the test is untimed,

‐ Hey, Tree Witch shot us a link.

‐ Hey, Uncle Stan, am I gonna be a farmers' market freak

‐ Hey, vote for Annie.

‐ Hey, vote for his mom, dude!

‐ Hey, wait a minute, Exit McBrexit.

‐ Hey, we don't keep any cash on‐site.

‐ Hey, when we're done eating,

‐ Hey, where does Dad keep his extra toilet?

‐ Hey, where'd everybody go?

‐ Hey, where'd the twinkle in your eye go?

‐ Hey, you forgot me in the car!

‐ Hey, you're gonna wanna give it a few minutes.

‐ Hey, you're new. I'm Uncle Stan.

‐ Hey, you're treading water. That's tight.

‐ Hey! [all gasp]

‐ Hey! [all grunting]

‐ Hey.

‐ Hey.

‐ Hi‐yah!

‐ Hi, am I too late for Jing's magic act?

‐ Hi, Grandpa!

‐ Hi, I love witches. I'm a witch too.

‐ Hi. This is Padma Lakshmi.

‐ Hm?

‐ Hm.

‐ Hm.

‐ Hmm, A‐E‐I‐O‐U, and sometimes Y.

‐ Hmm, hmm.

‐ Hmm, I think they're assorted.

‐ Hmm, maybe the water's out on the whole street.

‐ Hmm?

‐ Hmm?

‐ Hmm? ‐ [gasps]

‐ Hmm.

‐ Hmm.

‐ Hmm.

‐ Hmm.

‐ Hmm.

‐ Hmm.

‐ Hmm...

‐ Hmm... ‐ Hey, sad married couple!

‐ Hola.

‐ Hold me up. I wanna see the birds.

‐ Hold me. ‐ I can't.

‐ Hold out your hands.

‐ Hold up!

‐ Holy cannoli! This guy's boom‐batz!

‐ Honestly, like cool grass under your feet

‐ Honey, are you ready to love us unconditionally?

‐ Honey, it says "Employees Only."

‐ Honey, kids don't know what clocks are.

‐ Honey, the neighbors called.

‐ Honey, we do this every year,

‐ Honey, what the hell happened?

‐ Honey, why are you crying.

‐ Hoo‐wee, Duncan, everything gets hotter

‐ Hooray to us and our loving bond!

‐ Hot enough for ya?

‐ How about some Jack, Jack?

‐ How are Duncan and Kimberly doing in psycho camp?

‐ How are we gonna pick up enough scooters

‐ How can you tell it's cool?

‐ How did he do that?

‐ How did you do on the test, Duncan?

‐ How did you know it was me?

‐ How do I use this?

‐ How do you start this thing? ‐ Ugh.

‐ How does she do that?

‐ How else was I supposed to afford a gift?

‐ How long are we gonna keep fighting

‐ How many years have you guys been doing this?

‐ How much did all this cost?

‐ Howdy, troubled campers!

‐ Hug me. ‐ Ahh!

‐ Huh?

‐ Huh?

‐ Huh?

‐ Huh? Oh, I'm sorry, Sandra.

‐ Huh? Oh, thanks, yeah,

‐ Huh? What?

‐ Huh. Everyone's suddenly stopped,

‐ Huh. Who could that be at this hour?

‐ Hup, hup!

‐ Hup, hup! [grunts]

‐ Hurry up, Duncan.

‐ Huxter!

‐ I achieved all I wanted in life.

‐ I actually liked my old room,

‐ I ain't no bum. [panting]

‐ I also run a suicide hotline.

‐ I am not a soft touch.

‐ I am not.

‐ I am so glad I took a sick day for this.

‐ I am so sick of your fighting.

‐ I am so sorry. Here's what we gotta do.

‐ I am truly blessed.

‐ I am, Brendan.

‐ I apologize for the toxic atmosphere.

‐ I better not hear it.

‐ I call shotgun!

‐ I called back‐right seat when I said,

‐ I called shotgun in bed when I woke up!

‐ I came in like a wrecking ball ♪

‐ I can always forgive, but I never forget,

‐ I can do it. ‐ I wasn't talking to you!

‐ I can get qualified.

‐ I can't believe I'm saying this,

‐ I can't believe we're flying economy plus.

‐ I can't believe you still came.

‐ I can't believe... all: Whee!

‐ I can't brush my teeth.

‐ I can't get ahead of him.

‐ I can't go in.

‐ I can't really talk about why I'm leaving early,

‐ I can't sell it to you,

‐ I can't solve this thing! ‐ What's the case, Shane?

‐ I can't take this anymore!

‐ I can't wait that long.

‐ I can't wait to get into college

‐ I can't wait to glue this in a scrapbook.

‐ I can't wash my face.

‐ I cannot believe those horrible words

‐ I cannot tell a lie. You're gonna crush this, Jing.

‐ I destroyed him.

‐ I didn't do anything. Animals just die sometimes.

‐ I didn't know you were so into racing, Mom.

‐ I didn't know you were such a film buff.

‐ I didn't like it at first, but it grew on me.

‐ I didn't say you weren't sexy.

‐ I dig lots of stuff out of toilets.

‐ I do everything for this family,

‐ I do not!

‐ I don't blame him.

‐ I don't find myself attracted to‐‐

‐ I don't have all day.

‐ I don't have that kind of money in my mom's purse.

‐ I don't have time to sit in the shower, okay?

‐ I don't know why we fight so much.

‐ I don't know, chilling.

‐ I don't know, honey. Which bed do you think?

‐ I don't know, nothing.

‐ I don't know.

‐ I don't know.

‐ I don't know. Bathroom or killed by Gordy.

‐ I don't know. He never talks about it.

‐ I don't know. I thought we'd be kicking some things around,

‐ I don't know. She might be there.

‐ I don't know. Some screamin' babies?

‐ I don't know. You're like a six.

‐ I don't make the rules. The gods do.

‐ I don't mind. I‐‐I quit on you in bowling.

‐ I don't need college.

‐ I don't recognize

‐ I don't see a problem with that.

‐ I don't see you going. Go!

‐ I don't think I can go through

‐ I don't think I made her sexy enough.

‐ I don't think it's gonna hold the two of us!

‐ I don't think so. ‐ Oh, yes, he is.

‐ I don't wanna be me anymore.

‐ I don't wanna stay up for three weeks.

‐ I don't want anybody as my enemy.

‐ I find something new every time I watch it.

‐ I found chocolate syrup under Mommy's bed.

‐ I generally use my imagination for wondering

‐ I got a shot. Should I open fire?

‐ I got browns and grays.

‐ I got him! Mayor Jen, tough on crime!

‐ I got it! I got it!

‐ I got you, babe.

‐ I gotta go. School starts in three hours.

‐ I guess she's not here.

‐ I guess we could have one adult day.

‐ I guess we'll never learn how to be real witches.

‐ I guess you could say that this citizen is upstanding.

‐ I had no idea you wanted to hang out.

‐ I hate my yearbook picture! Can we sue the school?

‐ I hate them, but that's pretty cool.

‐ I have a brother?

‐ I have a good reason. [grunts]

‐ I have a mistress in Des Moines.

‐ I have an emergency!

‐ I have never been more furious

‐ I have no idea.

‐ I have to.

‐ I hear you, man‐‐ I didn't take it,

‐ I heard it's from Fort Lauderdale.

‐ I heard it's not just a cold sore.

‐ I heard you want to be a witch.

‐ I held your place in the buffet line, Jack!

‐ I hope you were paying attention, Kimberly,

‐ I introduced you!

‐ I just have to pass this fitness test.

‐ I just like having fun with you.

‐ I just like my after‐work Chardonnay.

‐ I just like to be liked. ‐ [barks, grunts]

‐ I knew being the wife of a Pad Boy would be tough,

‐ I knew I was perfect. [camera shutter clicks]

‐ I knew I'd get you here someday, Jack.

‐ I knew it.

‐ I knew you could do something tight.

‐ I know how to do it.

‐ I know I'm not supposed to say this,

‐ I know things are tough, but if we stick together,

‐ I know this is the most terrifying thing

‐ I know, but I can't ditch Sandra on their anniversary.

‐ I know, you warned me.

‐ I know.

‐ I know.

‐ I lost the cutest boy.

‐ I love bowling. It's just that...

‐ I love burning stuff, but why are we doing this?

‐ I love family.

‐ I love haunted houses.

‐ I love it.

‐ I love that feeling.

‐ I love you guys.

‐ I love you too!

‐ I love you, construction man.

‐ I love you, Mr. Hollywood!

‐ I love you, sexy driver.

‐ I loved that it was more

‐ I made eye contact with the conductor!

‐ I made Mommy think about what she did.

‐ I mean I'm in men's underwear.

‐ I mean, I don't expect perfection,

‐ I meant back‐right seat when I called shotgun!

‐ I need to ask a sensitive question,

‐ I no mind.

‐ I now think it's cool. ‐ I now think the same.

‐ I paid for the shell. I'm gonna eat the shell.

‐ I place the quarter in my hand,

‐ I popped those razzis good.

‐ I read in a book that if you give a moose a muffin,

‐ I respect your integrity, Annie,

‐ I respond well to directness.

‐ I said, "Goodbye forever, old Kimberly.

‐ I saw God. ‐ I love it.

‐ I saw your escalator video.

‐ I see "Shrink my Fannie Annie" from Oakdale's

‐ I smell burnt toast.

‐ I sponsor nine kids and one alpaca in Honduras.

‐ I sprayed some Shout on the shirt.

‐ I still don't get what you're‐‐

‐ I still like mine uncut.

‐ I still wonder who was in that casket.

‐ I take issue with the word "stupid," Duncan.

‐ I think he murdered his twin.

‐ I think it's beautiful.

‐ I think so?

‐ I think they want us to take the stairs.

‐ I think you mean I can

‐ I thought I was into it.

‐ I thought this was us time, Jack.

‐ I thought we solved this spoon thing.

‐ I thought we were here for us time.

‐ I thought you wanted this as bad as I do.

‐ I thought you were almost done.

‐ I told the barber how much it meant to you,

‐ I told you he's not okay.

‐ I told you it doesn't wipe their memory.

‐ I told you that's not the kind of coach I am!

‐ I told you to never come back

‐ I told you, they're really smart.

‐ I took the civil service test.

‐ I underestimated how tough this family is,

‐ I understand.

‐ I wanna be friends with my hormones.

‐ I wanna die with Kimberly. ‐ Aw.

‐ I wanna see "Plants" again!

‐ I wanna win like you, Mommy. Vote Jing!

‐ I want a stash!

‐ I want mangley spoon!

‐ I want to pretend I'm an adult and get the pizza myself.

‐ I want to try! ‐ Then me!

‐ I want your advice on fashion and boys,

‐ I was going to do a princess castle,

‐ I was gonna say Post Malone our faces,

‐ I was riding the Zip Line of Zuczess out of here,

‐ I was so close. Hey, wait up.

‐ I was thinking about it.

‐ I wasn't always.

‐ I wasn't invited

‐ I win. Suck it, I guess.

‐ I wish I didn't have to take this stupid PSAT.

‐ I wish I knew the word to describe

‐ I won a Nobel Prize.

‐ I would eat every meal on a branch if I could,

‐ I‐I think he's learned his lesson.

‐ I. Don't. Need. Your. Pity.

‐ I'd like that.

‐ I'd love to make small talk with you, Mr. Mitch,

‐ I'd smile for you...

‐ I'll allow it this once.

‐ I'll be crying in the dumpster.

‐ I'll bet it's a spaceship.

‐ I'll change it. ‐ Don't you dare.

‐ I'll do it. ‐ Really?

‐ I'll find my own magazines.

‐ I'll get him wasted and teach him how to cuss.

‐ I'll help you, little girl.

‐ I'll move it into the front seat!

‐ I'll never be high priestess!

‐ I'll never forget you either, Kyle.

‐ I'll never let anything happen to you, honey!

‐ I'll roll the dice.

‐ I'll sleep in a pot as long as it takes, Mommy.

‐ I'm a basenji, the barkless dog.

‐ I'm a hero.

‐ I'm a part‐time waterslide operator.

‐ I'm a witch. ‐ That's awesome.

‐ I'm afraid for your life, but it's so adorable.

‐ I'm afraid that's my fault. ‐ Huh?

‐ I'm allergic to fried foods, but that's okay.

‐ I'm already there!

‐ I'm an actress.

‐ I'm assistant coach of my sister's team,

‐ I'm back!

‐ I'm cashing in an old IOU Duncan

‐ I'm citing you for being over the line and a naughty bumper.

‐ I'm cold, man.

‐ I'm confused.

‐ I'm dead.

‐ I'm finally on the fridge! I've reached the top!

‐ I'm fired up. ‐ Hell yeah!

‐ I'm flippin' you off. Double bird!

‐ I'm going to the car. ‐ Let's go together as a team.

‐ I'm gonna barf. ‐ Good. That means you're safe.

‐ I'm gonna bathe in you tonight.

‐ I'm gonna eat good this summer.

‐ I'm gonna get my first kiss! ‐ I know!

‐ I'm gonna have to wait

‐ I'm gonna lay down the law on that kid

‐ I'm gonna walk around City Hall hitting on women.

‐ I'm having fun with you too.

‐ I'm in a coven. I know how to talk to witches.

‐ I'm keeping mine.

‐ I'm not drinking your pee.

‐ I'm not gonna rat you out.

‐ I'm not here to rob you! ‐ I'm so sorry.

‐ I'm not just saying that.

‐ I'm not like you!

‐ I'm not my father. And I'm wearing a cup.

‐ I'm not wasting our window on this fat‐shamer.

‐ I'm on it!

‐ I'm pouring Grammy on my pancake.

‐ I'm ready.

‐ I'm sending you to hell!

‐ I'm showing beers they can have a people with me.

‐ I'm so sorry, Maple Bar.

‐ I'm so sure I'm gonna be a celebrity,

‐ I'm sorry I never visited you in Germany!

‐ I'm sorry your future wife died!

‐ I'm sorry your wives won't touch you,

‐ I'm sorry, but I took an oath to uphold the law.

‐ I'm sorry, Duncan, but it's time to go.

‐ I'm sorry, God! You're so damn brave!

‐ I'm sorry, honey.

‐ I'm sorry, Jack, I was so busy talking about Duncan

‐ I'm sorry, Mayor Jen,

‐ I'm sorry, Stan, but we have a very busy schedule,

‐ I'm sorry, this wife is not for swap.

‐ I'm sorry. Can I kill Spider‐Man?

‐ I'm sorry. I don't see a sold tag.

‐ I'm starting to think Wayne wasn't the problem.

‐ I'm taking the test because it might snow on Saturday

‐ I'm telling Mom and Dad, if they're still alive!

‐ I'm telling Mommy you said that.

‐ I'm telling Santa on you!

‐ I'm telling ya, I've auditioned

‐ I'm telling you, my grandma knows some trippy songs.

‐ I'm the mayor of a very small town.

‐ I'm the sky marshal.

‐ I'm tired of looking like me.

‐ I'm trying to write an anniversary haiku for my wife!

‐ I'm trying! Oof!

‐ I'm watching "Shut Up, Trish."

‐ I've already forgotten she peed her pants.

‐ I've been nothing but nice to you!

‐ I've been worried sick about what Mom would do to me

‐ I've got school, but whatever.

‐ I've never been on vacation.

‐ I've never been unsupervised.

‐ I've never had them. Is it spicy?

‐ I've never kissed anyone before.

‐ I've reconnected with my son.

‐ I've waited so long to hear those words, Gutter,

‐ I've wanted to kiss Marcus forever,

‐ Idiot?

‐ If a little Stroke‐a and Dentos did that,

‐ If I miss Cardi B's hologram, I'm kicking your ass!

‐ If it means anything, my enjoyment

‐ If it's in the woods, it's gotta be good.

‐ If people thought "Shut Up, Trish" was funny,

‐ If we could get the pops to hang with our unpop,

‐ If you don't, you lose your edge.

‐ If you think Uncle Stan's got such a great life,

‐ If you want to have sex with your wife again,

‐ If you're enjoying that feeling of respect,

‐ If you're gonna make this about personal gain,

‐ Ignore them texts, Duncan.

‐ Imhotep.

‐ In that case, welcome to the Men in Black.

‐ In that case, you got a gun?

‐ In under five minutes.

‐ Interesting point, Annie.

‐ Interesting. Interesting. [chuckles nervously]

‐ Is it bad that's his second bottle?

‐ Is it bad?

‐ Is it just me, or does lunch taste better on a branch?

‐ Is it the noise? The watery pizza?

‐ Is Mom losing her mind?

‐ Is that my shower chair? I have one rule, Duncan!

‐ Is that the end of the story, Mom?

‐ Is that true? ‐ On Xbox.

‐ Is that your van? Cool. ‐ Yep.

‐ Is there any civil servant here

‐ Isn't that right, Claire?

‐ Isn't that the jet ski that we left for Nick and Nina?

‐ It does make us more interesting, honey.

‐ It goes to 1,600, ass brain. ‐ Fine, I got that, then.

‐ It is a cold sore! Ew!

‐ It is neither cheese nor crust.

‐ It is us! The four of us!

‐ It is, a lot of the time, but once in a while,

‐ It says here that three former therapy campers

‐ It was a thank you for the charm bracelet he bought me.

‐ It was an emergency!

‐ It was Gutter's birthday.

‐ It was just so beautiful.

‐ It was just stuck in your belt loop.

‐ It was my idea to agree with you.

‐ It was my idea to fake it! I'm going first!

‐ It was my idea! I did everything!

‐ It was not a red zone! It was a white zone!

‐ It was your old dad's dying wish and we moved on.

‐ It was your radius, crapbrain.

‐ It'll be packed with cars and minivans.

‐ It's 11:00 a. m. and you're still in pajamas?

‐ It's a filthy musical

‐ It's a guitar!

‐ It's a lame‐o club

‐ It's a moose, stupid!

‐ It's a ringing phone.

‐ It's a Space Jammer's wet dream.

‐ It's actually a slowed down version

‐ It's actually an homage!

‐ It's August.

‐ It's better than yours!

‐ It's better you don't know. Just keep facing.

‐ It's cheaper to just send him!

‐ It's for family, Annie. All we got is family‐‐family!

‐ It's fun to laugh. How come you never laugh?

‐ It's getting cold, Bradley.

‐ It's getting dark. Where are we staying tonight?

‐ It's getting late.

‐ It's hard to be enthusiastic

‐ It's just good to hear wive music again.

‐ It's just you with a stapler, right?

‐ It's kinda working but I don't hear wedding bells.

‐ It's luau pig, your favorite.

‐ It's me.

‐ It's not fair! Kimberly got to do it!

‐ It's not just the dancing.

‐ It's not you. It's my wife.

‐ It's Oakie nomination day.

‐ It's obvious you want me to say Tom Hanks.

‐ It's okay if you can't do it, Duncan.

‐ It's okay, Jing, a blood moon

‐ It's our constitutional right to kill these witches.

‐ It's over, Jack. It's all over.

‐ It's so unfair that I deliver pizzas

‐ It's sturdy, but I don't feel cradled.

‐ It's true.

‐ It's your big day.

‐ It's your father's favorite meal.

‐ It's your fault we're here with Clappy McCastrated.

‐ It's yours, Mommy.

‐ J. Geils. Jackson 5.

‐ Jack that was so reckless and dangerous

‐ Jack, Annie! What are we gonna do?

‐ Jack, are you breaking up with me?

‐ Jack, focus.

‐ Jack, get Duncan outta here.

‐ Jack, hoist me.

‐ Jack, I need your opinion here.

‐ Jack, it's 10:30. ‐ [gasps]

‐ Jack, it's been on your honey‐do list forever.

‐ Jack, let him go at his own pace.

‐ Jack, our daughter is an unpop.

‐ Jack, that should be us

‐ Jack, you're confessing things for no reason.

‐ Jack, you're driving too fast and too furious.

‐ Jack, you're supposed to be supervising the party.

‐ Jack! ‐ Right, right, right.

‐ Jack! Roundabout!

‐ Jack. ‐ Fine.

‐ Jack's back, baby!

‐ Jack's back, baby.

‐ Jackie, can you do me a solid?

‐ Jackie, Jackie, look at me.

‐ Jackie! ‐ [screams]

‐ Jayden likes you.

‐ Jealousy doesn't look good on you, Jack.

‐ Jeremy.

‐ Jeremy's gone.

‐ Jing and Jack. Aww.

‐ Jing, it's Christmas.

‐ Jing, it's over. He's dead.

‐ Jing, take the wheel! ‐ Why does she get to do it?

‐ Jing, the iPad locked! What's your passcode again?

‐ Jing, this is everything we've been working toward

‐ Jing, where are you?

‐ Jing, you're not qualified to be a witch.

‐ Juice boxes? ‐ Yup.

‐ Just a head. God is good.

‐ Just a like? No comment?

‐ Just get back to your girl, D.

‐ Just like Chip and Joanna Gaines.

‐ Just like Jay Leno?

‐ Just one of the perks of no one caring about you.

‐ Just stop! You don't understand.

‐ Just the cure for my horrible Tuesday depression.

‐ Just turn them inside out.

‐ Keg Stand Kenny?

‐ Kick her ass, Maury.

‐ Kick! ‐ [groans]

‐ Kids, don't get into strangers' cars.

‐ Kids, Jing didn't finish her trick.

‐ Kill everyone here? ‐ No.

‐ Kimberly Harris!

‐ Kimberly is our leader now.

‐ Kimberly told me you were supervising.

‐ Kimberly,

‐ Kimberly, did I save the day?

‐ Kimberly, go!

‐ Kimberly, help! ‐ [yelps]

‐ Kimberly, I'm cheating on you with a bird.

‐ Kimberly, shut your phone off.

‐ Kimberly, this party is sick.

‐ Kimberly, you understand this boppity‐boop!

‐ Kimberly!

‐ Kimberly! You forgot to recant

‐ Kimberly?

‐ Knock it off!

‐ Kris, Caitlyn, Kourtney, Kim, Khloé, Kendall,

‐ Language! Well, I gotta get to work.

‐ Last lap. We're never gonna win this.

‐ Laughing gives you wrinkles. I'd rather be hot than happy.

‐ Lavender calms me down!

‐ Lead the way to the scooter hot spots.

‐ Left foot green? I did not see that coming.

‐ Leslie, the annoyingly upbeat woman

‐ Let Daddio show you how it's done.

‐ Let go of me, you drunk!

‐ Let me sit on the end 'cause I'm for sure ralphing.

‐ Let me stop you right there.

‐ Let's get famous by making a viral video.

‐ Let's get out of here.

‐ Let's go, Kimberly.

‐ Let's go. I'm skipping the test!

‐ Let's lay some ground rules here.

‐ Let's meddle.

‐ Let's not do this here.

‐ Let's see what my future looks like!

‐ Let's see what's in the mailbox.

‐ Let's start easy: one sit‐up.

‐ Like Derek and Julianne Hough grinding on each other.

‐ Like Hellmann's mayonnaise you're not!

‐ Lil' Joey, would you verify this is an ordinary quarter?

‐ Lime?! This isn't gonna work!

‐ Listen up.

‐ Listen, I know you two are having your differences,

‐ Listen, I'll give it to you for,

‐ Listen, I'm totally fine with dying.

‐ Listen, we can answer questions all day.

‐ Livestream up, Yangzi? ‐ You know I'm rolling.

‐ Look at him. He's alive.

‐ Look away!

‐ Look both ways. Thank you.

‐ Look what I found.

‐ Look what the black cat dragged in‐‐

‐ Look, Annie, you can't just sit out here yelling at cars

‐ Look, I'm Mommy on her wedding day!

‐ Look, Jing, I got a Fun Size Snickers bar.

‐ Look! I buckled myself in.

‐ Looking for these?

‐ Looking forward to our stage kiss.

‐ Lots of competition. All right.

‐ Love you. Bumpy road. Gotta pee.

‐ Madam President, Duncan Harris

‐ Make friends!

‐ Make him live my life!

‐ Make that speed bump your bitch, Dad.

‐ Making memories!

‐ Mama's Boy.

‐ Mama's coming. Mama's coming.

‐ Mancala, cribbage,

‐ Mangley spoon is mine!

‐ Marcus' mom told him, "Practice makes perfect,"

‐ Margot's the new Kimberly!

‐ Maybe he'll work on a crab boat

‐ Maybe I should be jealous.

‐ Maybe I should.

‐ Maybe I will. Maybe I won't.

‐ Maybe we could scare them with whatever the hell this is.

‐ Maybe you need me back,

‐ Maybe you'd better go.

‐ Maybe‐‐I don't know‐‐ say, across the street?

‐ Mayor Jen is ruining our lives.

‐ Me want food boob.

‐ Meet and greet? Wow, just like rock stars!

‐ Mia is right.

‐ Mia somehow found somebody better than me.

‐ Mia, are you freaking out?

‐ Mia, check it out. Ab toner.

‐ Mia, you work here?

‐ Mia's right.

‐ Mm‐hmm. ‐ Kill me!

‐ Mm‐mmm.

‐ Mm, I'm going on my break!

‐ Mm, no, uh, uh...

‐ Mm, yup. So I gotta go...to school.

‐ Mm.

‐ Mm.

‐ Mm.

‐ Mm.

‐ Mm.

‐ Mm.

‐ Mm.

‐ Mm. ‐ [whines softly]

‐ Mm. ‐ Hmm.

‐ Mm...

‐ Mm... ‐ [rasps]

‐ Mmm, I think you made Duncan's mom a little too sexy.

‐ Mmm, me like taco.

‐ Mmm, mmm, mmm,

‐ Mmm! [chuckles]

‐ Mmm.

‐ Mocktails!

‐ Mom, Dad's telling me how to make moves on Mia.

‐ Mom, I've been thinking.

‐ Mom, Kimberly's killing me with your good mixer!

‐ Mom, my name's Duncan.

‐ Mom, no! ‐ What did I do?

‐ Mom, stop trying to make it cute.

‐ Mom, the Benadryl! [cap pops]

‐ Mom, the Pad Boys are here! ‐ What do you see, Shane?

‐ Mom!

‐ Mom! ‐ Oh!

‐ Mom!!!

‐ Mom? What are you doing here?

‐ Mom's cart!

‐ Mommy got shot at.

‐ Mommy, Daddy!

‐ Mommy, look!

‐ Mommy, tell me this shirt looks nice

‐ Mommy! ‐ Aaaaaaah!

‐ Mommy! ‐ Aaaaaaah!

‐ Mommy! ‐ Aaaaaaah!

‐ Mommy! ‐ Aaaaaaah!

‐ Mommy! ‐ Aaaaaaah!

‐ Mommy! ‐ Aaaaaaah!

‐ Mommy! ‐ Aaaaaaah!

‐ Mommy! ‐ Aaaaaaah!

‐ Mommy! ‐ Aaaaaaah!

‐ Mommy! ‐ Aaaaaaah!

‐ Mommy! ‐ Aaaaaaah!

‐ Mommy! I just scored!

‐ Mommy? ‐ Yes, sweetie?

‐ Mommy. ‐ Aaaaaaah.

‐ Mommy's home!

‐ Monday, Tuesday‐‐ ‐ Eat your pizza.

‐ Mother doesn't like me having sugar after 4:00 p. m.

‐ Movies with friends. Bye.

‐ Mr. and Mrs. Harris, welcome.

‐ Mr. Mitch, I checked the daily count of parking tickets,

‐ Mr. Mitch, I licked the cafeteria floor on a bet,

‐ Mr. Mitch? You're a teacher.

‐ Mr. Mitch.

‐ Mrs. H, may I turn your head?

‐ My calves don't fit in my track suit anymore.

‐ My coin purse only has thwee nickels.

‐ My entire life, I've never had one.

‐ My God, what happened?

‐ My grandma's always trying

‐ My man.

‐ My medicinal shake will clear this right up.

‐ My mommy told me not to talk to strangers.

‐ My new best friend's a she‐devil.

‐ My parents are doing the surgery.

‐ My phantom ponytail!

‐ My phone's out there!

‐ My renegade husband and I are here for our daughter's braces.

‐ My replacement kimono tie!

‐ My socks don't fit anymore!

‐ My summer? The uzh.

‐ My teacher won't call on me anymore at school.

‐ My yearbook picture sucked. My name's not even Jeremy.

‐ Nah, bruh.

‐ Nah, but his parents seem cool.

‐ Nah, Fitz and Gutter will take care of it.

‐ Nah, I'm just playing a mind game

‐ Nah, that's okay.

‐ Nah, this is just as good.

‐ Nah.

‐ Napkin me, A‐Train.

‐ Need something, Dad?

‐ Neglected her so much.

‐ Neil LaDouche.

‐ Nerd! ‐ I know!

‐ Never give me my space again. ‐ That's all I wanted to hear.

‐ Never mind. I'll just be Mary Todd.

‐ Never! Happy anniversary, baby!

‐ Never.

‐ Nice going. I'm ruined!

‐ Nice meeting you! Sorry about your life!

‐ Nice try, Wendell, but I know my Annie

‐ Nice try, you already bought the tickets.

‐ Nicko, text me that shampoo you use on your PT.

‐ Night, Jing. ‐ Night, Mommy.

‐ Night, Kimberly. ‐ Just don't.

‐ Nine‐men's morris. ‐ Sure.

‐ No brushing? Have at it.

‐ No can do. Going to Pipe‐Con.

‐ No college, huh?

‐ No doubt one of your flimflams.

‐ No Easter Bunny? Ma!

‐ No link. You need a wand.

‐ No money, just pride.

‐ No need to thank me.

‐ No offense, son, but you're practically an invalid.

‐ No pain, no‐‐ ooh, that looks bad.

‐ No problem! Okay.

‐ No problemo.

‐ No summer school?

‐ No time for fantasies, Jing.

‐ No water, electric, gas, my precious landline.

‐ No way, and I'm gonna touch that fence

‐ No way! Are these Uh‐Oh Oreos?

‐ No way. I would never quit on you.

‐ No, and I share way too much with this class.

‐ No, but I believe in me.

‐ No, but take video.

‐ No, Dad, we're doing this,

‐ No, Grandma, it's just a joke.

‐ No, Grandma! Please don't leave!

‐ No, I am! I am!

‐ No, I came up with this brilliant Jack Hack

‐ No, I danced on my own desk for my birthday.

‐ No, I don't need milk.

‐ No, I need my privacy in case a boy calls.

‐ No, I'll let you know when I hear something.

‐ No, I'm not like you. I'm motivating them.

‐ No, I'm your mother's brother.

‐ No, it's obvious I've failed you.

‐ No, Jack, if she wants to be a little businesswoman

‐ No, Jack, we're here to talk about my Oakie Award.

‐ No, Jing, that means the window is closing.

‐ No, little girls and horses don't mix.

‐ No, my dad's a mall cop, and he told me about it,

‐ No, please keep the toe ring. That was a gift.

‐ No, Pop, I won't let you stew in anything

‐ No, this is for a water landing.

‐ No, train!

‐ No, we don't, Mia One and Mia Two.

‐ No, we don't. I just hate your pants.

‐ No, we're taking the stairs.

‐ No, we're trying to make money.

‐ No, worse. I've outgrown my room.

‐ No, you're impressed with me tonight,

‐ No!

‐ No!

‐ No! I love this job.

‐ No! I'd rather die together now

‐ No! I'm using them!

‐ No! You'll corrupt him with your pool halls,

‐ No.

‐ No.

‐ No.

‐ No.

‐ No. ‐ American flag?

‐ No. ‐ Brakes?

‐ No. ‐ Helmets.

‐ No. ‐ Well,

‐ No. ‐ Well, whatever.

‐ No. Duncan's childhood is over.

‐ Nobody has, Mom.

‐ Nope, you didn't.

‐ Not a prob.

‐ Not anymore.

‐ Not everybody was in on it.

‐ Not going?

‐ Not good.

‐ Not if I find my way back to him first.

‐ Not if I quit first. ‐ Get my milk!

‐ Not if you bump his ass there ain't.

‐ Not it! No!

‐ Not it! No! This is so unfair.

‐ Not letting you outgrow me. ‐ Duncan.

‐ Not now, Annie, this is my last ball

‐ Not now, Jing.

‐ Not on my watch.

‐ Not really the definition of couple, but sure, why not?

‐ Not really. ‐ Hop on!

‐ Not them. The parking lady.

‐ Not today, hags.

‐ Not yet. But in the meantime...

‐ Not...it?

‐ Nothin' but the best.

‐ Nothing like getting touched by other people.

‐ Nothing! There's nothing!

‐ Nothing.

‐ Now I'll never get to thrash a photog. [grunts]

‐ Now legend has it in the early 2000s,

‐ Now remember our motto: W‐I‐N.

‐ Now we're getting somewhere.

‐ Now you do me.

‐ Now, let's have five minutes

‐ Now, our program's all about teamwork,

‐ Now, that sounds sick, but first I got to lay on my back

‐ Now, when you work the night shift,

‐ Oakdale Militia, assemble!

‐ Oakdale Public Access presents the nominees

‐ Oakdale, you've got yourself a deal.

‐ Of course, always.

‐ Of course, but don't call me coach.

‐ Of course, but you know who never

‐ Of course! We gotta exhume the body!

‐ Of course.

‐ Of course. Everyone knows how to kiss.

‐ Officer Maple Bar? ‐ You know this horse?

‐ Oh Annie, thank God you're back!

‐ Oh my God, I have a nemesis!

‐ Oh my God.

‐ Oh sure, it starts out as motivation.

‐ Oh yeah, I've been cooking up something

‐ Oh‐‐oh, good. College stuff.

‐ Oh, "Shut Up, Trish" is this hilarious video

‐ Oh, all right.

‐ Oh, and you'll be playing opposite Marcus.

‐ Oh, baby!

‐ Oh, Bex, I don't want to smother Dunkie,

‐ Oh, boy. Listen, honey, Duncan's 15 now.

‐ Oh, can you pull this stick out?

‐ Oh, Chef Jing, the plastic spaghetti and Barbie leg

‐ Oh, come on, I only left it there

‐ Oh, come on, Jack, you know you would've blabbed,

‐ Oh, come on!

‐ Oh, don't think of us as parents.

‐ Oh, Dunkie, I'm glad your pants are off.

‐ Oh, for crying out loud.

‐ Oh, get off our backs. We just swam a mile to shore.

‐ Oh, going on vacation?

‐ Oh, great Aranyani, goddess of the forest.

‐ Oh, he showed and told.

‐ Oh, Helen, we all know he's never coming back.

‐ Oh, her leg is touching mine!

‐ Oh, here we go!

‐ Oh, hey Jing. Here's your pizza.

‐ Oh, hey, Dad,

‐ Oh, hey, Duncan.

‐ Oh, hey, I'm Randy from Animal Control.

‐ Oh, hey, Mia, sorry you had to see that last night.

‐ Oh, hey, Mr. Harris.

‐ Oh, hey. Sup?

‐ Oh, honey, I would turn the whole world against you

‐ Oh, honey, it's never too late

‐ Oh, I can't let Mia see this. It might be a turn off.

‐ Oh, I hate my life! ‐ Damn, D.

‐ Oh, I know this! Uh, he's a guy.

‐ Oh, I thought that was your first name.

‐ Oh, I thought your life is all fun.

‐ Oh, I wanna say it's the panda at the zoo,

‐ Oh, I'd hate to, but Mom's already trapped me

‐ Oh, I'll get your milk because I love you!

‐ Oh, I'm going. Here I go.

‐ Oh, I'm just scamming chumps with my uncle.

‐ Oh, I'm not. I'm into winning.

‐ Oh, I'm so sorry. Hop back in.

‐ Oh, it's just a picture I drew on vacation.

‐ Oh, it's on.

‐ Oh, it's so nice to be able to have a real conversation.

‐ Oh, just give 'em a pill and sign 'em up for a sport.

‐ Oh, like you won't.

‐ Oh, like your pee is so great!

‐ Oh, mama wants.

‐ Oh, man. [all giggle]

‐ Oh, mercy!

‐ Oh, my God, Cody has a chest hair.

‐ Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God.

‐ Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God.

‐ Oh, my God!

‐ Oh, my God.

‐ Oh, my God. Calm down.

‐ Oh, my God. Duncan, look.

‐ Oh, my God. It says "Release the eee‐vil."

‐ Oh, my God. Tylan's a dick.

‐ Oh, my God. What is that?

‐ Oh, my God. Your walkies are still on.

‐ Oh, my goodness. ‐ Oh.

‐ Oh, my gosh.

‐ Oh, my mom doesn't let me eat at food trucks.

‐ Oh, my water's breaking.

‐ Oh, my. ‐ Not that face.

‐ Oh, no, Dad thinks his father loves him!

‐ Oh, no, no, no, wait!

‐ Oh, no, you don't.

‐ Oh, no. Duncan peed himself.

‐ Oh, no. The herpe kiss!

‐ Oh, not in public, silly!

‐ Oh, now hush. Come hug your grandma.

‐ Oh, now I'm good enough for your coven?

‐ Oh, okay, like baby aggressions!

‐ Oh, she's too heavy!

‐ Oh, sorry about tonight. I was trying to get you scared

‐ Oh, sure. Sure.

‐ Oh, thank God.

‐ Oh, thank God.

‐ Oh, thank God. Yes.

‐ Oh, thank you.

‐ Oh, that could be any Wave Master 3000

‐ Oh, that sucks!

‐ Oh, that was my ex from my old school.

‐ Oh, that's great, sweetie! Who's my little superstar?!

‐ Oh, that's the one answer I do know.

‐ Oh, that's what they want you to think.

‐ Oh, they knew how much I wanted this.

‐ Oh, this? I think it's just a pimple,

‐ Oh, tough guy, eh?

‐ Oh, we have to have this. ‐ Yeah, she's a beaut.

‐ Oh, we're sorry, honey.

‐ Oh, we've got quite a little story too.

‐ Oh, well, I'll go, then.

‐ Oh, well, there's the door. You want to go, go.

‐ Oh, whoa.

‐ Oh, wow, gravy tastes so much better out of a trophy.

‐ Oh, yeah, he's the best. ‐ But you made him cry.

‐ Oh, yeah, I was driving backwards

‐ Oh, yeah, I'm a ball of stress.

‐ Oh, yeah, money good.

‐ Oh, yeah, they were all over me.

‐ Oh, yeah, we're gonna have to gut the place.

‐ Oh, yeah, we've been doing this for years.

‐ Oh, yeah, well, I, uh, skipped the test,

‐ Oh, yeah, yeah. I've been meaning to call.

‐ Oh, yeah! But first,

‐ Oh, yeah.

‐ Oh, yeah. Keg Stand Kenny.

‐ Oh, yeah. Slow and low.

‐ Oh, yes, sir. You'd be amazed at what I don't know.

‐ Oh, yes. I never get pizza at home.

‐ Oh, you're doing deep tissue?

‐ Oh, you're gonna love it.

‐ Oh!

‐ Oh!

‐ Oh! ‐ [gasps]

‐ Oh! ‐ [grunts]

‐ Oh! ‐ Ooh!

‐ Oh! [grunts]

‐ Oh! I wanna say it's a giant centipede at the zoo,

‐ Oh. Thank you.

‐ Oh. Then just charge scooters.

‐ Ohh, I can't decide what to build.

‐ Ohh.

‐ Okay, all fueled up.

‐ Okay, but choose your words carefully.

‐ Okay, but I just love the twist at the end

‐ Okay, but if you don't make it back,

‐ Okay, but just to play it safe...

‐ Okay, but the show's starting.

‐ Okay, but this one isn't as good.

‐ Okay, bye!

‐ Okay, captioning "grateful" with prayer hands,

‐ Okay, coven, let's sell some potions.

‐ Okay, Duncan, please just pick one chore

‐ Okay, Duncan. I'm gonna go in swinging.

‐ Okay, Dunkie, don't forget.

‐ Okay, everybody, I'm sorry you got dragged over here.

‐ Okay, everybody, sleep tight,

‐ Okay, gang, now get out there

‐ Okay, hang on.

‐ Okay, Henley.

‐ Okay, I got it open, so somebody else has to go up

‐ Okay, I pulled out my old file

‐ Okay, I think we hit our max on asses for today.

‐ Okay, I was never here, right?

‐ Okay, I'll hold it until you get the cash.

‐ Okay, Jack, you'll drive your truck

‐ Okay, Jing, good luck following that.

‐ Okay, Jing, we wowed 'em today,

‐ Okay, kids, go inside

‐ Okay, Kimberly, you just gotta say,

‐ Okay, legend has it wrong. The ghost of Gordy isn't real.

‐ Okay, let me start by saying,

‐ Okay, lie down, keep your arms to your sides,

‐ Okay, listen up.

‐ Okay, Marcus thinks I'm crazy.

‐ Okay, now you lost me. Let's recap.

‐ Okay, okay, as long as your father is here

‐ Okay, okay, I'm starting to see it!

‐ Okay, our turn. ‐ Yeah, switch.

‐ Okay, pose. Smile. You're meeting your heroes.

‐ Okay, sure. Why not?

‐ Okay, that's enough campaigning for you.

‐ Okay, then whose fault is it?

‐ Okay, time to go. Miss you. Have a great time. Bye!

‐ Okay, uh, how do I put this lightly?

‐ Okay, we need berries, a sports bra, contact lenses,

‐ Okay, we're done with this.

‐ Okay, what are we looking for, Mom?

‐ Okay, who wants to be burned to death first?

‐ Okay, you elected me, Mayor Jen,

‐ Okay, you're up.

‐ Okay! One of you has kindling.

‐ Okay.

‐ Okay.

‐ Okay.

‐ Okay.

‐ Okay.

‐ Okay.

‐ Okay. ‐ But I almost died.

‐ Okay. ‐ Bye, lady.

‐ Okay. ‐ Eep!

‐ Okay. ‐ Huh?

‐ Okay. ‐ Not you.

‐ Okay. Here we go.

‐ Okie doke!

‐ On "King of Queens," who lives in the basement?

‐ On a weekday? Yeah, there's school.

‐ On my cue, let's start haunting this bitch.

‐ Once I'm famous, none of us will ever have to shower again.

‐ Once the public knows you as something, you're branded.

‐ One bonfire coming up.

‐ One day, when I was still trying to get my band going

‐ One eyeball, please?

‐ One of them could be the next Jeff Bezos,

‐ One, one, one, one, one, one!

‐ One.

‐ Only took 30 years and $7,000,

‐ Ooh ‐ Ah.

‐ Ooh, "The Seedy Life of Plants"!

‐ Ooh, a commercial loading zone infraction.

‐ Ooh, ahh.

‐ Ooh, Daddy needs a doctor.

‐ Ooh, how about this?

‐ Ooh, I'm sensing a twist coming.

‐ Ooh, is that all you got?!

‐ Ooh, let me check Mia's Insta.

‐ Ooh, ow! What the hell was that?!

‐ Ooh, parasailing, waterskiing, wakeboarding.

‐ Ooh, that's one I didn't say!

‐ Ooh, that's SPF: Special Parking Force.

‐ Ooh, time for our couples massage!

‐ Ooh, who's the bone man?

‐ Ooh, why are you so strong?

‐ Ooh, Wolf. I love it.

‐ Ooh!

‐ Ooh! ‐ [grunts]

‐ Ooh! ‐ Ah!

‐ Ooh! Hit me.

‐ Ooh! The Cheerios on this guy!

‐ Ooh. ‐ Ow.

‐ Oops, that's Duncan's self‐portrait.

‐ Or let's have an imaginary tea party.

‐ Or would you care to wager your Huxter for...

‐ Orange slices? ‐ Yup.

‐ Ouch. You catch on quick.

‐ Our bags are packed, Annie.

‐ Our my award.

‐ Our old dad had a job.

‐ Our pleasure. And the Oaks will

‐ Out attic is filled with fast‐moving spiders

‐ Over here, Duncan!

‐ Ow!

‐ Ow!

‐ Ow!

‐ Ow! I have weak bones

‐ Ow! My metatarsals!

‐ Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

‐ Ow! Please, Kimberly.

‐ Ow.

‐ Papa Mom sponsors a car,

‐ Papa Moms is hiring.

‐ Pass. ‐ Oh, it's on.

‐ People could think we had something to do with it!

‐ People love supporting the military.

‐ People make out under us,

‐ Piece of cake. I got one any idiot would know.

‐ Places in three minutes!

‐ Play again? ‐ Whatever.

‐ Please don't write that ticket.

‐ Please, anybody, help!

‐ Please, just beat us!

‐ Pleasure doing business with you.

‐ Plug it in, Bex.

‐ Poor Mommy.

‐ Popularity is for losers.

‐ Pretend? Well, I was a back half of a donkey

‐ Probably better than me.

‐ Probably win money at cards or trick a water park

‐ Proud of you, son.

‐ Quench your thirst, Mr. Harris!

‐ Quick, Duncan, get to the van.

‐ Quick. Let's ride 'em.

‐ Quiet. We're watching "Teen Housewives."

‐ Quite the little soiree, isn't it?

‐ Ravioli?

‐ Ready to rehearse that kiss?

‐ Ready, Jing?

‐ Ready!

‐ Ready. Set.

‐ Really enjoying that pizza, huh, Claire?

‐ Really good.

‐ Really?

‐ Red hot pepper flakes. ‐ Loose change.

‐ Relax, Grandma. There's Steve Harvey.

‐ Relax, honey. It'll grow back.

‐ Relax, Kimberly. I'll do all the work.

‐ Relax, my kid says they're gonna bend it

‐ Relax, they won't shoot me if I'm surrounded by kids.

‐ Remember the time I pushed you down a flight of stairs

‐ Remember when I pretended

‐ Remember, it's three songs,

‐ Remove the boot, Harris!

‐ Remove the boot, Harris! [hydraulics hiss]

‐ Respect my privacy, paparazzi scum.

‐ Retinal image!

‐ Riddle me something, Jammer.

‐ Ride or die, baby.

‐ Right on! Warm Pepsi?

‐ Right this way.

‐ Right, let's do this.

‐ Right, let's make a GoFundMe for Duncan's funeral.

‐ Right, right.

‐ Right, right. Froyo?

‐ Rip‐off!

‐ Rockin' into Metallica Monopoly.

‐ Ron!

‐ Roof beats branch any day.

‐ Round of fried Cokes for me and my fwiends.

‐ Same thing. ‐ But we promised Duncan to go

‐ Sandra's the Space Jammer?

‐ Santa! ‐ Thor, show yourself!

‐ Say goodbye to your town. It's your last Witch Day ever.

‐ Say it, Dad! ‐ Say what?

‐ Say no more. This weekend

‐ See, he honestly believes that's the answer.

‐ See, isn't he adorable? His name's Kyle.

‐ See, the key to raising a prize‐winning watermelon

‐ See? He no mind.

‐ Seemed pretty obvious.

‐ Seriously, you got that? They never actually said it.

‐ Shane treats you both terribly,

‐ Shane! Fitz!

‐ Sharp rock ahead. Veer left!

‐ She gets it!

‐ She really wants that attic cleaned.

‐ She's a five‐year‐old girl. She's fragile and sensitive.

‐ She's getting "pre‐wrecked."

‐ She's my hero.

‐ She's right.

‐ Shock your system with Stroke‐a‐Cola.

‐ Should we leave the room? ‐ No, we're done.

‐ Showtime, little man.

‐ Shut up, Grandma!

‐ Shut up, Jing!

‐ Shut up, Trish!

‐ Shut up!

‐ Side, rear, front. Wait your turn. Wait your turn.

‐ Since I thought I lost my baby boy forever.

‐ Since when are you a psycho driver?

‐ Sing songs around a beach bonfire...

‐ Sisters. Am I right?

‐ Slow and steady wins the race, Dunkie.

‐ Small‐talk Stacy, you're gonna love this.

‐ So am I the new face of Stroke‐a‐Cola?

‐ So being in this Oaks Club is really making you happy?

‐ So do you love it? ‐ No. I wanna list it.

‐ So good.

‐ So here's Pete Townshend smashing his guitar,

‐ So his wuv was court‐mandated?

‐ So how do we get powers too? ‐ It's not that easy.

‐ So how is it? Forgivably good?

‐ So how ya doin', huh? Jack? The kids?

‐ So I can scream at them,

‐ So I'm giving my Oakie to the dancing crossing guard.

‐ So is anyone gonna give me feedback on my rap?

‐ So now it is funny to be rude

‐ So now, you're one of those weirdos who goes around

‐ So she texted me on my prepaid cell phone,

‐ So sorry. I'll get right on it.

‐ So the only one who didn't know was me?

‐ So there's a hole in your skull

‐ So this is the job you took

‐ So wanna watch "King of Queens" on our bed or yours?

‐ So we downgraded to a small smoking room next to you.

‐ So we stole your banana boat, and now your memories are ours!

‐ So what are you in the mood for?

‐ So what are your plans for the summer?

‐ So what first?

‐ So where were we?

‐ So where'd the quarter go?

‐ So you're doing great in the Oakie voting.

‐ So, are we gonna talk about what happened at your office?

‐ So, are you kids ready for the big game?

‐ So, how's Tammy?

‐ So, tell me, Harrises.

‐ So, the coven's been texting,

‐ So?

‐ So? You said barbershops are hair slaughterhouses.

‐ Socks are for feet.

‐ Soft touch Daddy! Ooh!

‐ Some of his tears hit me.

‐ Somebody better change street sweeping to Tuesdays,

‐ Somebody that looks crazy, unhinged, psychotic.

‐ Someone tried to take over the plane.

‐ Something more mature, like maybe warrior princess,

‐ Something popped in my chest.

‐ Something so breathtaking,

‐ Sorry to interrupt you and your date.

‐ Sorry we accused you of using witchcraft for evil.

‐ Sorry we exploited you being mad at Duncan

‐ Sorry we had to use the money

‐ Sorry, as stage manager,

‐ Sorry, but I wanted to share the moment with my family

‐ Sorry, I'm hormonal.

‐ Sorry, I've been blackballed at every hotel

‐ Sorry, Jack. I just can't do it.

‐ Sorry, Jing.

‐ Sorry, kitty! ‐ Never apologize to a cat!

‐ Sorry, man, that doesn't fit my rock and roll persona.

‐ Sorry, my wife doesn't let me have brown liquor.

‐ Sorry, my witches' coven is electing a new high priestess.

‐ Sorry, that banana's for happy families only.

‐ Sorry, we witches don't make potions for tummy aches.

‐ Sorry, what I meant to scream was,

‐ Sorry, when he's at school, he's your problem.

‐ Sorry, you're driving this one

‐ Sorry. My dad was a yelling coach,

‐ Sounds complicated. ‐ No, we could do this.

‐ Speaking of running,

‐ Speed bump turned out amazing, Jack.

‐ Speed bumps make you angry.

‐ Spit that nasty stuff!

‐ Spray me, Daddy. ‐ Sorry, Jing.

‐ Squeeze the life out of him, baby.

‐ Stand down, Officer Maple Bar.

‐ Stand down. You were saying?

‐ Start already!

‐ Start using that head of yours!

‐ Stay golden, Ponytail.

‐ Stay right here.

‐ Stop flicking your measles at people, Melissa.

‐ Stop it. You're making me sleepy.

‐ Stop kicking me!

‐ Stop making it so easy. ‐ You're on!

‐ Stop strangling yourself, Jack!

‐ Stop the celebration!

‐ Stop topping me!

‐ Stop!

‐ Stop. ‐ Oh good, you're awake.

‐ Strawberry, butter pecan, banana nut‐‐

‐ Strike! ‐ What did I tell you?!

‐ Suave shampoo and glitter.

‐ Sup, Kimberly. You ready for our big kiss?

‐ Sure she did, Jing. And I'm a B cup.

‐ Sure, give it a shot.

‐ Sure, no prob and good luck. ‐ Thanks.

‐ Sure. ‐ My arm is cramping.

‐ Sure. I bet he's walking this year.

‐ Surprise me. And take your time, Daddy.

‐ Surprisingly good turnout for Jayden.

‐ Survival journal. Day one.

‐ Swap. ‐ And action.

‐ Sweetie, I appreciate your concern, but trust me,

‐ Ta‐da! I put another spoon in the garbage disposal,

‐ Ta‐ta for now.

‐ Take her to the haunted house when she's good and scared.

‐ Take your bathy? ‐ No.

‐ Talk to me, Mr. Mitch.

‐ Team what?

‐ Tell me you heard that. ‐ I definitely heard that.

‐ Tempting, but I've never taken a sick day.

‐ Ten and two.

‐ Thank you all for another great year,

‐ Thank you for coming in, Mr. Harris.

‐ Thank you for giving me a lovely place to sit

‐ Thank you for your leadership.

‐ Thank you, Jimmy Don. And I just want to say

‐ Thank you!

‐ Thank you.

‐ Thank you.

‐ Thank you. ‐ No, honey.

‐ Thank you. Thank you.

‐ Thanks for believing in me, Uncle Stan.

‐ Thanks for dining with us.

‐ Thanks for teaching me that vulgar celebration dance, Mom.

‐ Thanks, brother. Enjoy your family.

‐ Thanks, but I'm super racist.

‐ Thanks, Dad.

‐ Thanks, Daddy.

‐ Thanks, honey. Mwah.

‐ Thanks, I hate it. [laughter]

‐ Thanks, lady, but there's a long line

‐ Thanks, Marcus. Can't wait to read the script.

‐ Thanks, Mom. And you and Sandra

‐ Thanks, Overalls, but it doesn't matter what we do.

‐ Thanks, Padma. See ya tomorrow.

‐ Thanks. And let's go bowling again sometime.

‐ Thanks. Make sure he's pissed.

‐ That ain't how the sticker tells it.

‐ That all just happened, right?

‐ That B12's got a kick.

‐ That better be ravioli. [belches]

‐ That ends today.

‐ That guy was actually pretty nice.

‐ That hurts.

‐ That is anatomically impossible.

‐ That is for legitimate allergies.

‐ That is some well‐timed lightning.

‐ That is the worst thing I've ever seen.

‐ That kid needs to get hit.

‐ That shirt looks nice on you, honey.

‐ That uniform fits you nicely, Mavis.

‐ That was a great instinct to say nothing, Annie.

‐ That was a little overwrought.

‐ That was a scary movie.

‐ That was an awesome day, Uncle Stan!

‐ That was close,

‐ That was freaking awesome, dude,

‐ That was my first lie. You do that every day?

‐ That was so cool, Mom.

‐ That was the best movie I've ever seen,

‐ That was the day I should have said it to him,

‐ That wasn't me.

‐ That zip line's only for one person!

‐ That'll be five bucks.

‐ That's 'cause usually we spend 30 minutes

‐ That's a celebrity apology. It's meaningless.

‐ That's a game changer.

‐ That's a great idea.

‐ That's all I needed to hear.

‐ That's all I wanted to hear.

‐ That's Dad's shower chair. He has one rule.

‐ That's good, cause we never do.

‐ That's great.

‐ That's great. He looks like a Kyle.

‐ That's how we got this trip.

‐ That's it! I quit, man!

‐ That's it.

‐ That's it. We're going home.

‐ That's Kimberly? ‐ The banana boat.

‐ That's kind of cool.

‐ That's my boy!

‐ That's my boy.

‐ That's my private persona.

‐ That's nice.

‐ That's not a guitar.

‐ That's not how "not it" works, mister.

‐ That's our Dick!

‐ That's right, bitch.

‐ That's right, losers, my mom solved the crime you couldn't.

‐ That's so stupid, right, Mia?

‐ That's the drink

‐ That's the longest you've ever listened.

‐ That's the mark of a true artist.

‐ That's the nickname I've secretly always wanted!

‐ That's the only hit you'll ever have!

‐ That's the smartest thing you've ever said, Duncan.

‐ That's the spirit, honey!

‐ That's what I'm saying!

‐ That's what unpops like us say

‐ That's what's up, Witch Day!

‐ That's where Mike Love got married

‐ The 6'2" hot guy I saw in your retinal image.

‐ The age of humans is over.

‐ The cold months are brutal.

‐ The Compassion Cake you baked changed my life.

‐ The coven and I just discussed it

‐ The cow goes, "Barnyard Kids Books makes us

‐ The elevator is stairs for winners.

‐ The hell is goin' on?

‐ The laughing stops now. Mmm. Hee‐hee.

‐ The least we can do is beat the spread!

‐ The mecca of disposable income‐‐

‐ The number seven. You got it.

‐ The only resource America has left is our hotness.

‐ The only scary thing are these prices.

‐ The only thing I can do without you, conform.

‐ The only way we're ever gonna leave this place is

‐ The parents are so upset with Duncan,

‐ The president of the United States says you are.

‐ The quest for celebrity is a hollow pursuit.

‐ The same reason you painted your braces.

‐ The Space Jammer's not a he, it's a she!

‐ The Stay At Home Dads?

‐ The team thinks maybe we'd win more, or once,

‐ The traffic's all folding in on itself.

‐ The twins were up all night and I've got glee club tryouts.

‐ The what of a what?

‐ The witches kicked us out. Of course I beat my chest.

‐ Then I get back‐right seat!

‐ Then she'll kill herself for missing out.

‐ There are 500 shows on 600 streaming services

‐ There goes this month's rent.

‐ There is no gig.

‐ There is no pleasing that lady!

‐ There it is! [loud banging on glass]

‐ There it is.

‐ There you are. ‐ Uh‐oh.

‐ There you go. All aboard the Benny train.

‐ There's a car in front of us.

‐ There's a parking boot on our water main.

‐ There's a skull!

‐ There's no way around adolescence‐‐

‐ There's nothing to be afraid of.

‐ There's nothing wrong with staying home

‐ There's something goin' on between Joanna and Clint.

‐ These are beautiful, Jing.

‐ These days, teachers need side hustles

‐ They call me A‐Train.

‐ They didn't want you.

‐ They look like they're having fun.

‐ They might even name the waiting room

‐ They monopolized our entire day.

‐ They say if you listen close, you can still hear them scream.

‐ They stole my thunder at show‐and‐tell today.

‐ They think you're a drunk. ‐ I get this all the time.

‐ They took our home.

‐ They're acting out because they don't know

‐ They're all equally pathetic. Jack, pick one.

‐ They're coming back, guys! [record scratches]

‐ They're coming back. Close the house.

‐ They're coming. They're coming. They're coming.

‐ They're dead!

‐ They're in her room, and the nightstand's open.

‐ They're over. Over.

‐ They're sea ghosts, and their souls

‐ They're these little insults

‐ They've got a finished basement.

‐ Think about what you want most

‐ This cereal needs some berries.

‐ This could be the clean energy solution

‐ This dynamite is a hot dog!

‐ This goes on for another three hours,

‐ This has been my favorite dress on her all night.

‐ This is a miscarriage... of justice.

‐ This is a song about the wheels on the bus

‐ This is all I wanted‐‐

‐ This is big sis. You're welcome. Over.

‐ This is gonna be fun.

‐ This is gonna be the biggest political scandal

‐ This is humiliating.

‐ This is it, Dunkie! The mile run!

‐ This is me.

‐ This is my first day, so I don't know any different!

‐ This is my normal family dinner voice!

‐ This is so exciting! You only know me as Home Mom.

‐ This is the greatest vacation ever!

‐ This is the sweetest song I've ever heard.

‐ This is the year I win you.

‐ This is the year I'm winning Huxter.

‐ This is what we're talking about.

‐ This is what you do at work?! ‐ Not really. It's a slow day.

‐ This is why drama kids don't hook up.

‐ This is why we don't get invited

‐ This looks like a job for Animal Control.

‐ This one girl had to make new teeth

‐ This one's mine.

‐ This place is gonna blow. ‐ [gasps]

‐ This really sucks.

‐ This story has it all:

‐ This town has profited off our misery for too long.

‐ This was all a setup?

‐ This was completely unnecessary.

‐ This year's Oakie should go to someone with integrity,

‐ Those are some great racing sounds.

‐ Those aren't for you.

‐ Those presses are so loud.

‐ Threat‐en us! Threat‐en us! ‐ Stop it, kids!

‐ Threaten us, Daddy!

‐ Thus is the strength of our love.

‐ Ticklepalooza?

‐ Time to crank it up to turbo!

‐ Time to get branch.

‐ Time to juice the scoots.

‐ To alert people if you get touched?

‐ To Dr. Weinstein's!

‐ To Grandmother's house I go!

‐ To play spin the bottle into the recycling bin.

‐ To the buffet!

‐ To the limo! Go, go, go!

‐ Today was fun for me too, sweetheart,

‐ Told ya. ‐ When did that building go up?

‐ Tomorrow at 3:00 for Miley's big girl bed party,

‐ Tomorrow will be six.

‐ Too bad.

‐ Toot toot!

‐ Total pros.

‐ Totally.

‐ Trust Falls Wilderness Therapy Camp.

‐ Trust me, it's built up.

‐ Trust me. It's not. [gulps]

‐ Try it again without tempting fate, Jack.

‐ Tucked in? Tomorrow's Ticklepalooza!

‐ Turn in your ticket book. ‐ [sighs]

‐ Turns out, the money generated

‐ Twenty‐two percent?

‐ Two conflicting things?

‐ Ugh, can I go back to school, please?

‐ Ugh, can you do the Benadryl now?

‐ Ugh, come on. ‐ [groans]

‐ Ugh, I didn't listen to that train song

‐ Ugh, I don't care which Beach Boy died!

‐ Ugh, I feel like I'm dying.

‐ Ugh, I had it.

‐ Ugh, I know how you feel.

‐ Ugh, I need to be magic by Wednesday for show‐and‐tell.

‐ Ugh, I think my future sucks.

‐ Ugh, I'm not eating that. That touched beak.

‐ Ugh, I've been nagging him for 15 years.

‐ Ugh, is that really what my voice sounds like?

‐ Ugh, it's been done before.

‐ Ugh, leaving, bye. ‐ Hold on, Speedy McGee.

‐ Ugh, my lumbar is barking.

‐ Ugh, no fair.

‐ Ugh, okay, I'll do it.

‐ Ugh, quiet, I'm watching something important.

‐ Ugh, that should be my bloody mouth!

‐ Ugh, ugh.

‐ Ugh, ugh. Take that. Take all of it.

‐ Ugh, we need to stimulate our brains.

‐ Ugh, we're trapped. It's a dead end.

‐ Ugh, what's a girl gotta do to make the fridge?

‐ Ugh, who would have thought that using wild birds

‐ Ugh, you have so many rules.

‐ Ugh!

‐ Ugh! ‐ Damn, total hunk.

‐ Ugh! ‐ Duncan, train!

‐ Ugh! Go right.

‐ Ugh! I'm not gonna make it!

‐ Ugh! It's you.

‐ Ugh! Thanks a lot.

‐ Ugh! There's one in the garage.

‐ Ugh! Ugh! Ugh!

‐ Ugh! You make everything boring.

‐ Ugh.

‐ Ugh.

‐ Ugh.

‐ Ugh. ‐ Already racing, huh?

‐ Ugh. ‐ Yeah.

‐ Ugh. Good night.

‐ Ugh. Look, I'm a race car drivin' guy.

‐ Uh‐oh.

‐ Uh‐oh. ‐ Do we have a problem?

‐ Uh, Daddy?

‐ Uh, guys.

‐ Uh, I got 100.

‐ Uh, I had a big breakfast and I'm wearing my low‐tops,

‐ Uh, long story short, one thing led to another,

‐ Uh, my wife's name is Angie, and she's dead.

‐ Uh, okay, but seriously,

‐ Uh, that don't seem fair.

‐ Uh, the‐‐the race is about to start, Bex.

‐ Uh, those scooters are charging really fast.

‐ Uh, uh, uh, Kimberly, no, he's not worth it.

‐ Uh, usually that's all it would take 'cause you're you,

‐ Uh, why did you need us here for this?

‐ Uh, yeah, of course.

‐ Uh...good afternoon.

‐ Um, babe, you're nibbling the pillow tassel.

‐ Um, Germany. ‐ Right, right.

‐ Unless there was a more awesome party venue.

‐ Unless... ‐ Unless what?

‐ Us? Oh, we met on a plane.

‐ Use my noodle? Don't mind if I do!

‐ Very nice.

‐ Very well.

‐ Vote for my mom, Annie Harris.

‐ Wait a second. Aren't you the guy

‐ Wait till Lil Joey hears this.

‐ Wait till your mom sees this tiny bird mirror

‐ Wait, but I already missed the PSAT.

‐ Wait, I said that wrong.

‐ Wait, is this us covering up a murder?

‐ Wait, let's see what they have to say.

‐ Wait, that's not your regular job.

‐ Wait, they can sound like anybody?

‐ Wait, wait, go back to the ghost representing grief.

‐ Wait, what is "Shut Up, Trish"?

‐ Wait, you were just in bed. ‐ What?

‐ Wait. Who do I get to die with?

‐ Waiting for this?

‐ Wanna act like puppies? ‐ Okay.

‐ Want a little Jack Hack

‐ Want to go see the bearded baby?

‐ Was her nightstand open? ‐ [groans]

‐ Watch out! [crowd screaming]

‐ Watch this. You've got a deal.

‐ Watch your boy haggle.

‐ Way ahead of you, Mom.

‐ Way to inspire your brother like Rocky's trainer.

‐ We are a civil democracy.

‐ We are. I'm your uncle.

‐ We both got played like nine‐men's morris.

‐ We can cut the line for the playground swings.

‐ We can do this. We just need a bigger gesture.

‐ We can only get away with one more thing.

‐ We can protect the adorable alien

‐ We can't be riding around on a rocket.

‐ We can't do that here,

‐ We do each other's hair, nails,

‐ We don't have school 'cause it's Saturday.

‐ We don't take rejection well.

‐ We don't want you in our coven.

‐ We get trophies?!

‐ We got your back, waterslide‐‐I mean Mom.

‐ We gotta do something.

‐ We had a suite, but we missed our new friends.

‐ We hate living in that tree.

‐ We have a family calendar? How come nobody told me?

‐ We have a huge problem, Mr. Mitch.

‐ We have a surprise for you!

‐ We have dibs, you beta males.

‐ We haven't made love in days without them watching,

‐ We hijacked Cody's party

‐ We just want the best for you, Duncan.

‐ We know how much happiness this brings you, Mom,

‐ We love it.

‐ We love Mom.

‐ We love you, Oakdale!

‐ We missed you at the PSAT.

‐ We need to support your mom's principles, kids,

‐ We owe it all to you, Mom.

‐ We pick out a bland, friendless couple,

‐ We put carrots in that salad!

‐ We should've watched TV in bed with them.

‐ We used to work together.

‐ We were a hit, Daddy.

‐ We won! Trophies!

‐ We'd do it ourselves, but you know they taste better

‐ We'd rather die together than live apart.

‐ We'll be back tomorrow for the sofa after nap time.

‐ We're about to be famous forever.

‐ We're at the end of our rope, Bradley.

‐ We're down by one, Duncan. Got something to rile me up?

‐ We're gonna die!

‐ We're gonna fill that pit.

‐ We're never going back to that tree.

‐ We're never gonna get along, Mom.

‐ We're never gonna get that sofa.

‐ We're not getting it.

‐ We're not leaving.

‐ We're not suing anyone.

‐ We're painting a picture.

‐ We're pretending to not see you!

‐ We're sorry we sent you away.

‐ We've been here 20 years.

‐ We've been sitting outside Grampy's place

‐ Welcome back to "Maury."

‐ Welcome to Jurannie Park.

‐ Welcome to the Trail of Trust.

‐ Well, after we accidentally hired that sex offender

‐ Well, congratulations, you two.

‐ Well, everything's normal out here.

‐ Well, hello there.

‐ Well, I do want a kiss.

‐ Well, I hope you win,

‐ Well, I'm hell on wheels too. Pastel color wheels.

‐ Well, I'm out.

‐ Well, it took you long enough!

‐ Well, Jing, what would you like?

‐ Well, of course we say that,

‐ Well, of course. What's that?

‐ Well, only one more kid to enter.

‐ Well, opossum is nice to beaver,

‐ Well, or she could just not have the ice cream.

‐ Well, somebody knows how to talk to witches.

‐ Well, somebody's got to go up there.

‐ Well, that's gross. ‐ Mm.

‐ Well, that's not any toe ring.

‐ Well, the house really stinks, honey.

‐ Well, the night's young, and this Dew's got me feelin' good.

‐ Well, this is every teen's fantasy.

‐ Well, this is just delightful.

‐ Well, this was a fun place to grow up.

‐ Well, when you put it that way.

‐ Well, you better hurry. It's almost‐‐

‐ Well, you did put up with my cowboy boot years,

‐ Well, you failed at both, so get up there.

‐ Well, you have "it" now.

‐ Well, you might not find respectability sexy, Annie,

‐ Well, you two have completed the program in record time.

‐ Well, your mom's not here, is she?

‐ Well, your old dad ain't here, is he?

‐ Well, your wife ain't here, is she?

‐ Wendell, you look unwell.

‐ Were we ever.

‐ Were we watching the same movie?

‐ What a woman.

‐ What about Mr. Mitch?

‐ What are the active ingredients

‐ What are we gonna do? ‐ Just be cool.

‐ What are you doing up so early?

‐ What are you doing?

‐ What are you gonna do while I'm in there?

‐ What are you gonna take from us now, Mayor Jen,

‐ What are you working on, Jing?

‐ What did we do to deserve this?

‐ What do I get if I drink the whole thing?

‐ What do you got, Jing?

‐ What do you have to say for yourself, young man?

‐ What do you mean? We sleep in the van.

‐ What do you recommend?

‐ What do you think, Duncan?

‐ What do you want?

‐ What else did you have in your mouth?

‐ What happened to Mad Daddy?!

‐ What happened to Ryan and Daniel K? Over.

‐ What if he says no?

‐ What if I give you my goggles and this wet Snickers bar?

‐ What in the good Lord's name have I done

‐ What is that? Some kinda Slenderman freak?

‐ What is this weird feeling?

‐ What kind of bang we got in that account, Mia?

‐ What little dog?

‐ What makes you such a great enemy?

‐ What paint store do you shop at?

‐ What rock and roll persona?

‐ What the heck is happening down there?

‐ What the heck's going on?

‐ What the hell is going on?

‐ What the hell is Halloween?

‐ What the hell is that?

‐ What the hell is that? A little house?

‐ What the‐‐ ‐ He's cleaning your teeth.

‐ What up, America?

‐ What up, free world?

‐ What was that?

‐ What‐‐just drive.

‐ What, no! [grunts]

‐ What?

‐ What?

‐ What?

‐ What?

‐ What? ‐ Nothing, nothing. Good set.

‐ What? ‐ Yeah, you know what?

‐ What? A woman can't be good at haiku?

‐ What? It's a free program. [Kimberly groans]

‐ What? That's how my mother told it to me.

‐ What? There were vibes.

‐ What? What are you even talking about?

‐ What? What did you do to him?

‐ What? Where's that coming from?

‐ What? You told me you were gonna build it yourself

‐ What?!

‐ What's "Grease"?

‐ What's for dinner, honey?

‐ What's going on, honey? ‐ [sighs] Okay.

‐ What's happening? [gasps]

‐ What's happening? I'm scared.

‐ What's more important?

‐ What's so funny? "Jay Leno's Garage"?

‐ What's wrong with it?

‐ What's wrong with you?

‐ What's wrong? ‐ Hang on, let me jiggle it.

‐ What's your damage, lady?

‐ What's your problem with Uncle Stan?

‐ When are we leaving?

‐ When are you due?

‐ When are you due?

‐ When did you call him?

‐ When the licensed paranormal investigator

‐ When they hear you're from Boca Raton,

‐ When we get discovered, you're not gonna need a mom.

‐ When we go shopping, we can finally

‐ When you said you didn't want to go to college,

‐ When you're not spazzing about what days we have school,

‐ Whenever life gets tough,

‐ Where are they? Show yourselves, cowards!

‐ Where are those birds? You made a fool of me.

‐ Where are we?

‐ Where are you getting this stuff, AOC?

‐ Where's my respect,

‐ Which is why we need this massaging sofa in my man cave,

‐ White because you painted it, scumbag.

‐ Who are these friendly jerks?

‐ Who are those guys?

‐ Who are you?

‐ Who is this loser? ‐ I'm Douglas.

‐ Who the hell else would I mean?

‐ Who wants cake and/or ice cream?

‐ Who?

‐ Who's Marvin?

‐ Who's riding on the bus?

‐ Who's rockin' my chair next? Big Jack Harris!

‐ Who's the Space Jammer?

‐ Whoa‐ho, ass over teakettle.

‐ Whoa, hold on, Margot's parents are lost at sea.

‐ Whoa, how did you do that?

‐ Whoa, one viral video, and you're set for life.

‐ Whoa, son, I had no idea. Sorry to bother you.

‐ Whoa, what? ‐ Oh, come on.

‐ Whoa!

‐ Whoa! ‐ Ah, I'm sorry, Mommy!

‐ Whoa! ‐ Ah!

‐ Whoa! ‐ Oh, my God!

‐ Whoa! ‐ What the?

‐ Whoa! ‐ Whoa!

‐ Whoa! [fabric ripping]

‐ Whoa! Rev, please.

‐ Whoa! Save some of that progress

‐ Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! ‐ [cackles]

‐ Whoa. Annie,

‐ Whoo‐hoo‐hoo!

‐ Whoo!

‐ Whoo! ‐ Sugar Tickets!

‐ Whoo! Civil service!

‐ Whoo! We tied! We tied!

‐ Why are you yelling?

‐ Why bother?

‐ Why do we have to campaign? It's your award.

‐ Why does everybody care about college?

‐ Why don't you buy us the sofa, Mia?

‐ Why don't you just relax and I'll put my arm around you?

‐ Why is he living with us?

‐ Why is that lie lightbulb flashing?

‐ Why not?

‐ Why should I follow you?

‐ Why wouldn't you meet my son?

‐ Why?

‐ Why? You gonna cry?

‐ Will you read me a bedtime story?

‐ Will you two knock it off

‐ Winner, winner, eggplant parm dinner.

‐ Winning would be a mowale booster.

‐ With her crazy competitive side and my ability

‐ Without cartons, I have to carry milk to school

‐ Without my job I just have no purpose.

‐ Without your dad yelling, I've lost my killer instinct.

‐ Wolf, your bow and arrow.

‐ Women's intuition at its finest.

‐ Won't that hurt their feelings?

‐ Wonderful attitude.

‐ Worst food poisoning of my life.

‐ Wouldn't even let me on the tour.

‐ Wow, at your age I was wild about my roller skates.

‐ Wow, Douglas really turned it around,

‐ Wow, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't crushed,

‐ Wow, ice cream for dinner. This is the life.

‐ Wow, Jing, you are ready for vacation.

‐ Wow, Kimberly Harris!

‐ Wow, Mom.

‐ Wow, Mother Nature brought her A‐Game tonight.

‐ Wow, she kicked him out just like that.

‐ Wow, your hashtag game is really improving, Mom.

‐ Wow! He thinks continents are consonants,

‐ Wow. Flair bartending.

‐ Wow. I've never been in your room longer than‐‐

‐ Wow. They're a Heinz family.

‐ Y'all remember when we used to drink beer?

‐ Ya, I keep hearing that word, and it sounds adorable.

‐ Yay, I'm nuts!

‐ Yay! I'm in your coven, Kimberly.

‐ Yay! Shoot me the link.

‐ Yay...

‐ Yeah, and my future's bright.

‐ Yeah, and she's stupid rich.

‐ Yeah, and we know it was you who cast

‐ Yeah, and you missed my rap

‐ Yeah, bruh.

‐ Yeah, but don't worry.

‐ Yeah, but especially me.

‐ Yeah, but I figured you'd do it anyway.

‐ Yeah, but I'm a mom.

‐ Yeah, but just to be safe...

‐ Yeah, but we don't know what their relationship is.

‐ Yeah, but you've got birds. You win.

‐ Yeah, cool, cool, cool. Bones.

‐ Yeah, Dad, you have to punish me,

‐ Yeah, Duncan, don't you want to pre‐prepare for your future?

‐ Yeah, Duncan. It's all about the buildup.

‐ Yeah, fit and flare looks good on her.

‐ Yeah, girl.

‐ Yeah, good job.

‐ Yeah, help us, lady!

‐ Yeah, her back would break. Oh!

‐ Yeah, his dad's having heart surgery,

‐ Yeah, hosing down animals having sex is fun,

‐ Yeah, how did we get here? ‐ I don't know.

‐ Yeah, I can't do that. ‐ Neither can I.

‐ Yeah, I can't wait till we're estranged adults!

‐ Yeah, I got that. ‐ And tomorrow,

‐ Yeah, I gotta go. ‐ Wait.

‐ Yeah, I guess. ‐ Oh, Bex, I can always count

‐ Yeah, I hear ya.

‐ Yeah, I hope he gets some in heaven.

‐ Yeah, I'm excited too.

‐ Yeah, I've been cutting a little bit every night

‐ Yeah, if we didn't have the same mom and dad,

‐ Yeah, is anyone gonna say anything?

‐ Yeah, it is. Bye, Helen!

‐ Yeah, it was crazy to think we could win.

‐ Yeah, it's not like the Easter Bunny's gonna do it.

‐ Yeah, it's probably best you didn't take that test.

‐ Yeah, it's too‐‐

‐ Yeah, losers.

‐ Yeah, man wins again!

‐ Yeah, Mom, you stood up for your beliefs

‐ Yeah, my favorite part was when the ghost

‐ Yeah, my shoulder still does this.

‐ Yeah, okay, sure. Have a good sickness.

‐ Yeah, pre‐reqs are always in the way.

‐ Yeah, pretty much.

‐ Yeah, she's going through hell.

‐ Yeah, sneaks up on you.

‐ Yeah, sorry about that.

‐ Yeah, sorry, I can't.

‐ Yeah, sure. ‐ Okay.

‐ Yeah, sure. [slurps]

‐ Yeah, that was fun when we were 18.

‐ Yeah, there's something about the human touch

‐ Yeah, they're awful kids,

‐ Yeah, they're probably all

‐ Yeah, this camp blows, and you're a virgin!

‐ Yeah, this case is total Pad Boys turf.

‐ Yeah, this one is kind of on you, Mom.

‐ Yeah, to get 200, we're gonna need‐‐

‐ Yeah, turns out the water retention

‐ Yeah, turns out, I don't like being the man.

‐ Yeah, ugh, ugh, ugh. Dance with me, Mom.

‐ Yeah, we believe in you way more

‐ Yeah, we're all on top of each other.

‐ Yeah, we're just scamming the hotel

‐ Yeah, well, so did Ted Bundy.

‐ Yeah, who needs keg stands when you're making

‐ Yeah, wight a fwire under our butts!

‐ Yeah, yeah, they call 'em brain bombs.

‐ Yeah, you only eventually gave in.

‐ Yeah, you promised to treat us like crap.

‐ Yeah, you're crazy, lady!

‐ Yeah, you're definitely onto something.

‐ Yeah!

‐ Yeah!

‐ Yeah! ‐ Pow.

‐ Yeah! ‐ Whoo‐hoo!

‐ Yeah.

‐ Yeah. ‐ Carry on.

‐ Yeah. ‐ So true.

‐ Yeah. ‐ Uh‐huh.

‐ Yeah. [sucks saliva]

‐ Yeah. Only an idiot would be impressed by this con man.

‐ Yee‐haw! Is that right?

‐ Yelling at you? No.

‐ Yep. But they stopped making 'em in 2009.

‐ Yep. Every Margaritaville in the United States.

‐ Yep. Yep. Yep.

‐ Yes we do, and they are having a blast!

‐ Yes, and we want you to be part

‐ Yes, I did.

‐ Yes, I'm back!

‐ Yes, no more trying on clothes

‐ Yes, sweet Claire. Your eyes don't deceive.

‐ Yes, we'd like to order two‐‐

‐ Yes, yes, yes. Yes!

‐ Yo quiero answers!

‐ Yo, Bradley.

‐ You always zone out when you're driving.

‐ You and you are sociopaths! ‐ But great company.

‐ You are so impatient.

‐ You are. It's still in your mouth.

‐ You awake? You awake?

‐ You call that a parody of "The Natural"?!

‐ You call that running for your life?!

‐ You can be anything you wanna be, Jing!

‐ You can be fake FBI, fake CIA,

‐ You can die with me too, Daddy.

‐ You can never have too many friends, Annie.

‐ You can take the jet ski.

‐ You can't do that.

‐ You could drop a little somethin', somethin' in here.

‐ You could not be more wrong. Virtually walk with me.

‐ You did not just say that.

‐ You did the right thing dumping Shane,

‐ You did? ‐ [grunts]

‐ You didn't mean those nice things you said?

‐ You do? ‐ Sorry, I thought you knew.

‐ You don't care about my band at all.

‐ You don't take no for an answer.

‐ You don't talk to Uncle Stan. ‐ Never say his name!

‐ You done all right for yourself, son.

‐ You even spray‐painted my braces.

‐ You falsely accuse enough people,

‐ You get five. ‐ Don't need 'em.

‐ You gonna cry, rock star?

‐ You got anything else?

‐ You got it.

‐ You got my number.

‐ You got room for one more?

‐ You gotta embrace it, man; it's your moniker.

‐ You guys believed I could be popular

‐ You guys don't believe in me?

‐ You have my trust, oh, noble sister!

‐ You have so much to learn. Let's start with hot gossip.

‐ You have to end this relationship.

‐ You haven't taken one bite of food, Mom.

‐ You hear that, Jing?

‐ You heard him, Bradley! Pass!

‐ You here for a drink? Cut? Tattoo?

‐ You kids are in a lot of trouble.

‐ You know how it is with art.

‐ You know I do, Shane!

‐ You know I don't like to yell,

‐ You know I have to drag you out now, right?

‐ You know it's more important to me

‐ You know Men in Black isn't a real job.

‐ You know what I did.

‐ You know what, Dad? ‐ What?

‐ You know what, Kimberly? I'm feeling like it.

‐ You know what?

‐ You know what? I do.

‐ You know you're not allowed to have coffee.

‐ You know, grocery shopping for lazy people,

‐ You know, he's in the commercial.

‐ You know, in the '70s, they didn't shave the ice.

‐ You know, this is gonna be an extra special Witch Day

‐ You know, um, sometimes the best punishment

‐ You know, we could really use a pop of color under the sink.

‐ You know, when the Jammer first started striking,

‐ You know, when your face isn't buried in your phone,

‐ You know, you're being a real Wayne right now.

‐ You know, your father and I were cast as Rizzo and Kenickie

‐ You lied to me?

‐ You look official as hell.

‐ You look terrible, Brendell. What's wrong?

‐ You made us think we killed you!

‐ You mean can of soda.

‐ You mean Caspar Babypants

‐ You mean Channel Jen.

‐ You mean like...

‐ You mean we could actually have a...

‐ You mean what are we doing up so early?

‐ You mean words like "dignity," "trust," "parking"?

‐ You might feel like a big shot now,

‐ You monsters!

‐ You need to achieve your goals!

‐ You on the water heater, pull over.

‐ You really mean that? ‐ Yeah, I swear.

‐ You said you liked warrior princesses,

‐ You saw our video? Did we go viral?

‐ You saw that, right?

‐ You say that every year, Jack.

‐ You scammed me! ‐ What can I say?

‐ You seem distracted, Annie.

‐ You smell like our house. Come on!

‐ You sound and look terrible, honey.

‐ You think I'd throw you all out like I did Duncan?

‐ You think I'm unfit for leadership?

‐ You think so?

‐ You too, Mr. Mitch.

‐ You took a practice test!

‐ You traded him for a cupholder?

‐ You two need to work together,

‐ You used to hate my guitar.

‐ You wanna take this?

‐ You want some of this?

‐ You want to meet your nephew?

‐ You were dancing on a desk for your coworkers.

‐ You were in the military? ‐ No, but people love 'em.

‐ You were just gonna use him to ask me for money!

‐ You were mean to me.

‐ You were right, son!

‐ You were such a badass when we walked in,

‐ You weren't jealous, were you?

‐ You weren't part of this, Daddy.

‐ You what?

‐ You will never beat this game, lame ass.

‐ You.

‐ You'd be surprised. A lot. There were no sales at all.

‐ You're a bum, Duncan! A worthless bum!

‐ You're a liar, Mom! Go away!

‐ You're a plumber, Dad.

‐ You're a winner, Joey! Save your dad's kneecaps!

‐ You're all hooked up, Mr. Mitch.

‐ You're amazing. Let's kiss.

‐ You're celebrating him blowing off his PSAT?

‐ You're gonna do just fine.

‐ You're gonna wish we owned an elephant belt

‐ You're his father.

‐ You're just gonna keep talking like that

‐ You're just having a stroke.

‐ You're making out with guys? ‐ You're stealing Dad's stuff.

‐ You're not in charge anymore. Turn in your nail gun.

‐ You're not. ‐ Oh, thank God.

‐ You're playing the villain. ‐ But I'm a viral star.

‐ You're right, Bex. That was fun.

‐ You're right, honey. They do look excited to see me.

‐ You're right. Let's try to keep it down!

‐ You're scaring me, Daddy.

‐ You're shaking the water, Mom.

‐ You're suspended for a week.

‐ You're the best dad ever!

‐ You're the best.

‐ You're the rotten animal!

‐ You're too late, Annie! ‐ No!

‐ You're wasting your time, Mom.

‐ You're, uh, probably wondering

‐ You've got the heart of a lion, Bradley!

‐ You've never heard of "Shut Up, Trish?"

‐ Your band? Without me, there is no band.

‐ Your brother broke curfew. Get in the car.

‐ Your brother's unfused skull is not a toy!

‐ Your children? Me?

‐ Your father's a needy wreck, not psychotic.

‐ Your lame‐ass haircut is making people think

‐ Your mom's having a tough time without her job,

‐ Your mother gets shotgun!

‐ Your mouth! It's so pristine.

‐ Your pain is my pain.

‐ Your parents kiss good.

‐ Your seafood towers and $45 Cokes.

‐ Your sister's right.

‐ Your urine test says you're drug‐free

‐ Zoom works great, honey!

‐Ugh. ‐ Hurry up and eat

‐You saved my marriage again!

'cause he smoked your cigarettes, we're gonna fix ya!

'cause I'm gonna drop out just like Kanye.

'cause I'm here for you and I'm feeling really strong.

'Cause if not, I can stay home and HBO Max and wax.

'Cause if she is, we should keep her in the basement.

'cause my mom is vegan.

'Cause she pushed you out! Unh! Unh‐unh‐unh‐unh‐unh!

'Cause that is gonna mess my ass up.

'cause that pig cat's comin' home with me, baby.

'cause that's where we're going!

'Cause the last thing I need is traumatized kids.

'cause when I was peein' next to him,

'cause when they wear off...

'Twas a beautiful journey, but now 'tis done."

"America's Got"‐‐ what do you call it‐‐"Talent."

"Bop on the nose"?!

"Born a rotten animal."

"Damn, who's the cool new girl?"

"Do you hear that?"

"Farmer in the Dell" is a crowd‐pleaser.

"Frogger" it, baby.

"Hector The Detector" for the fourth time?

"It's okay, baby. The D‐man's here."

"Jayden's parents called!

"March hare"? What's happening to me?!

"Marcus, you wanna get Froyo sometime?"

"Mmm, this shrimp is so good,"

"Nah, that's okay."

"Oh, what a fun day annoying the Harrises,"

"Ooh, oh, wow, oh, boy, oh, Nick!"

"Rock‐ins Welcome"?!

"The Girl with the Million‐Dollar Smile"!

"Ugh, I'm gonna throw up. I'm throwin' and goin'."

[Aerosmith's "Train Kept a Rollin'"]

[alarm beeps] [gasps]

[all aw]

[all chanting] Threaten us! Threaten us!

[all cheer]

[all cheer]

[all cheer]

[all cheer]

[all cheer]

[all cheer]

[all cheer]

[all cheer]

[all cheer]

[all cheer]

[all cheer] ‐ An Oakie.

[all cheering]

[all cheering]

[all cheering]

[all cheering]

[all cheering]

[all cheering]

[all cheering]

[all cheering] ‐ Whoo! Yeah!

[all choking]

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all gasp]

[all gasp] ‐ [groans]

[all gasp] ‐ But first,

[all gasp] ‐ Whoa!

[all groan]

[all groan]

[all groan] ‐ No!

[all groan] Excuse us. Vacation's over.

[all grunt]

[all grunt]

[all grunting]

[all grunting]

[all grunting]

[all grunting]

[all grunting]

[all laugh, cheer]

[all panting]

[all panting]

[all panting]

[all scream]

[all scream]

[all scream]

[all scream]

[all scream]

[all scream]

[all scream]

[all scream]

[all scream]

[all screaming]

[all screaming]

[all screaming]

[all screaming]

[all shout]

[all sigh with relief]

[all sigh]

[all straining]

[all whimper] But we don't have time for that

[all wincing and groaning]

[angelic chorus]

[applause]

[applause]

[applause]

[applause] ‐ [gasps]

[as Steve Harvey] Uh, what's a body part

[ball thudding] ‐ [whistles]

[balloon whizzes]

[beachgoers shouting, laughing]

[bed cloth tears]

[bed cloth tears] ‐ You're up.

[beeping] ‐ We got juice.

[belches]

[bell dings]

[bell dings]

[bell dings] ‐ Scam!

[bell dings] all: Mr. Mitch!

[bell rings]

[bell rings]

[bird chirping]

[bird chirps]

[birds chirping, sprinklers swishing]

[birds chirping]

[birds chirping]

[birds squawking]

[birds squawking]

[birds squawking]

[birds squawking]

[birds squawking]

[bleep] you, Dick!

[blows sharply] ‐ No, that's my lunch money.

[both cackle]

[both chuckle]

[both gasp, pant]

[both gasp]

[both growl]

[both growl]

[both grunt]

[both grunt]

[both grunt]

[both grunt]

[both grunt]

[both grunt]

[both grunt]

[both grunt] ‐ Move your flat ass!

[both grunting]

[both grunting] ‐ Whoo!

[both laugh evilly]

[both laugh]

[both laugh]

[both laugh]

[both laughing]

[both moaning]

[both moaning]

[both panting, gasp]

[both panting]

[both panting]

[both panting]

[both retch]

[both scream]

[both scream]

[both scream]

[both scream]

[both scream]

[both scream]

[both scream]

[both scream]

[both scream]

[both scream]

[both scream] ‐ Oh, no!

[both sigh]

[both squawking]

[both vocalizing] Respect!

[both wail]

[brakes screech]

[breathing heavily] [light guitar music]

[calypso music]

[camera shutter clicks]

[camera shutter snaps]

[cameras shutters snapping] [reporters clamoring]

[car crashes, explosion booms]

[car crashes, explosion booms]

[car door slams]

[car door slams]

[car horn blares]

[cars honking]

[cell phone buzzes]

[cell phone chimes]

[cell phone chimes] ‐ Oh, Mia liked my post!

[cell phone rings] Hello?

[cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause]

[cheers] ‐ Yes.

[children shouting and laughing]

[children sobbing]

[chimes shimmer]

[chimes shimmer]

[chipmunks chittering]

[chomps]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles]

[chuckles] Both my parents are heart surgeons.

[chuckles] Get it? Grew?

[chuckles] Ooh‐‐ow!

[chuckles] Yeah, that's good.

[chuckles] Yeah, that's good.

[claps excitedly]

[claps excitedly]

[clears throat] Hello!

[continues imitating rock music playing]

[coughing]

[crowd cheering]

[crowd cheers]

[crowd clamoring]

[crowd gasps] ‐ She's crazy!

[crowd muttering]

[crowd screaming]

[crowd screaming]

[crowd screaming]

[crowd screaming] ‐ Run!

[device vibrating]

[dog barking, gunfire, tires squealing]

[dolphins squeaking]

[door slams] ‐ Come on, Duncan.

[doorbell rings]

[dramatic music]

[dramatic music]

[dramatic music]

[dramatic music]

[dramatic musical sting]

[dramatic orchestral music]

[dramatic orchestral music]

[dramatic sting]

[ducks quacking]

[Duncan grunting] What a great place to get away

[Duncan panting]

[dynamic music]

[eerie music]

[electricity crackles]

[electricity crackling]

[electricity crackling]

[electricity crackling]

[electricity crackling]

[electricity humming]

[electronic music]

[elevator bell dings]

[elevator bell dings]

[engine buzzes]

[engine rumbles]

[engine sputtering]

[engine turns over]

[engine turns over]

[engines revving]

[engines revving]

[engines revving]

[engines revving]

[exhales deeply]

[festive music]

[foot hisses]

[gags]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps]

[gasps] ‐ [grunts]

[gasps] ‐ [laughs]

[gasps] [fabric rips]

[gasps] [squirrel chitters angrily]

[gasps] Are you my new purpose?

[gasps] I did it. I'm magic.

[gasps] I'll be right back.

[gasps] Me?!

[gasps] My parkie sense is tingling.

[gasps] Soccer!

[gasps] The blood moon!

[gasps] Wait! They got little hot dogs!

[gentle ukulele music]

[giggling]

[glugging]

[glugs loudly]

[gopher hissing] [screams] Their little hands!

[groan together]

[groaning echoing]

[groaning]

[groaning] Good job!

[groans sadly]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans]

[groans] ‐ Cut!

[groans] Okay, kids. Get ready for...

[groans] Pressure!

[growls]

[growls] Eat it, LaDouche.

[grumbles softly] That horse.

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunting]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[grunts] ‐ I hot‐oiled your ponytail!

[grunts] I wanna do my wife!

[guests chattering]

[guests cheering]

[gulping]

[gun cocking]

[gunfire]

[gunshot, dog barking]

[happily] They forgot me in the car.

[hard rock music playing]

[harp strums]

[harp strums]

[harp strums]

[harp strums]

[harp strums]

[harp strums] I gotta go.

[hawk shrieks]

[helicopter roaring]

[high‐pitched ring] ‐ Eh.

[honking] Well, I'm out of ideas.

[horse grunts]

[horse grunts]

[horse neighs]

[horse neighs]

[horse neighs]

[horse neighs]

[horse neighs] ‐ Oh, ah!

[hums country melody]

[hums, then grunts]

[hydraulics hiss]

[Icona Pop's "I Love It"]

[in a British accent] Give me a smooch, guv'nor!

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[indistinct chatter]

[inhales deeply]

[inhales] Glue.

[insects chirping]

[jar shatters]

[kids cheer]

[kids cheer]

[kids panting]

[kids shouting]

[knock at door]

[knocks on van door]

[laid‐back music]

[laughs evilly]

[laughs]

[laughs]

[laughs] ‐ Duncan, stop.

[laughs] Canada.

[laughs] This is kinda nice.

[laughter and cheering]

[laughter]

[laughter]

[laughter]

[laughter]

[laughter]

[laughter]

[laughter]

[laughter]

[laughter]

[laughter]

[laughter]

[laughter]

[laughter]

[laughter] ‐ That's them to a T.

[leisurely music]

[line ringing]

[line rings] ‐ What's up?

[liquid fizzing]

[lively music]

[lively music]

[lively music]

[loud thump]

[machinery whirring]

[mellow music]

[metal clanking]

[metal clanking]

[mimicking guitar music]

[mischievous music]

[moaning]

[moans dramatically]

[mockingly] Don't touch my shower chair.

[moose exhales sharply]

[moose growling] [both panting]

[moose growls]

[moose growls]

[moose growls]

[moose growls]

[moose growls] [both scream]

[motors whirring]

[muffled] ♪ Oh, my God, I did it

[muffled] Come on!

[muffled] Ha‐ha.

[muffled] You should hear what they have to say.

[murmurs of disappointment]

[music swells]

[normally] ♪ Oh, yeah

[normally] That I don't have to use anymore.

[nose continues whistling]

[nose whistling]

[ominous music]

[panting weakly]

[panting, grunts]

[panting, grunts]

[panting]

[panting]

[panting]

[panting]

[pants, gasps]

[pants, grunts]

[party horn blows]

[pedi‐cab creaks]

[people cheer] ‐ [inhales rapidly]

[people continue screaming]

[people screaming]

[people screaming]

[phone beeping]

[phone beeps] ‐ Bridget, it's Tom.

[phone beeps] ‐ He hung up.

[phone beeps] Chapman's Cattle?

[phone buzzes]

[phone buzzes]

[phone buzzes]

[phone buzzes]

[phone buzzes]

[phone buzzes]

[phone ringing]

[phone ringing]

[phone rings]

[phone rings] ‐ Mystic Mitch.

[pinball machine pings]

[pop music]

[pop music]

[pop music] ‐ Hi.

[record scratches] ‐ Room for two more?

[retches]

[riders cheering]

[riders cheering]

[robot dogs beep]

[robot dogs beep] [all scream]

[robot dogs whir] ‐ Bark. Bark.

[rock and roll music]

[rock music playing over TV]

[rock music]

[rocket booms]

[rocket roars]

[rocket rumbles]

[scattered applause]

[scattered laughter]

[school bell rings] Dave.

[scoffs] So boring.

[scooter dings] ‐ Scooters' charged.

[screaming]

[screaming] ENCOURAGEMENT!!!

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams]

[screams] ‐ [laughs]

[screams] Oh, God!

[screams] Whoa! ‐ Gotcha!

[shivers]

[shouts]

[shouts]

[shower running]

[shrieks]

[shudders]

[sighs contentedly, snoring]

[sighs contentedly] You know,

[sighs]

[sighs] I swore I wouldn't cry.

[sing song] We've got a vending machine.

[sinister music]

[siren blares]

[skin hisses] ‐ Oh, no!

[skin rips] ‐ Dude, you're bleeding.

[slow triumphant music]

[slow‐motion chomping]

[slurps, smacks lips]

[slurring] Is that little dog still your boss?

[smooches]

[smooching]

[smooching]

[sniffles] Dad, I forgive you.

[sniffles] Okay.

[snoring]

[sobbing]

[sobbing] Why couldn't it have been me?

[sobs] ‐ Oh, and happy birthday!

[soda rumbles]

[soft music]

[soft tense music]

[softly] Mm...

[spits] [laughter]

[splashes]

[sprinklers swishing]

[squeaking]

[squirrel chirping frantically]

[stomach growls] ‐ [grunts]

[stomach growls] Ugh, okay, I'm going!

[sucking saliva]

[tense music]

[tense music]

[thunder booming]

[thunder booms]

[thunder booms]

[thunder crackles loudly] [screams]

[tires screech]

[tires screeching]

[tires screeching]

[tires squeal]

[tires squeal] ‐ [screams]

[tires squeal] ‐ Good grief, Mother!

[tires squeal] [car horn blares]

[tires squealing]

[tires squealing]

[tires squealing]

[tires squealing]

[tires squealing]

[tires squealing]

[tires squealing]

[tires squealing]

[tires squealing]

[together] ♪ Train kept a‐rolling

[together] Bradley, go home!

[together] Go parents!

[together] I had two dates for the prom.

[together] Ooh.

[together] The window.

[together] Why not?

[train whistle blares]

[train whistle blares] ‐ [grunts]

[twangy upbeat music]

[twangy upbeat music]

[typewriter clacking]

[upbeat music playing]

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

[upbeat music]

[uplifting music]

[uplifting music]

[vacuum sucks]

[vacuum sucks] ‐ [squeals]

[video game beeping]

[wailing]

[warm music]

[watch beeps] Hey!

[wheezing]

[whispers] I'm so sorry.

[whistle blows]

[whistle blows]

[whistle blows]

[whistle blows] ‐ Great illegal catch, Gigi!

[wind whooshing]

[witches cackling]

[witches cackling]

[witches cackling]

[wondrous music]

[xylophone clanging]

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪ 'Cause it'll strike some other guy ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ All I wanted was to break your walls ♪

♪ All night long

♪ All through the town

♪ And also, is it crazy

♪ And also, is it weird

♪ And also, just maybe

♪ And also, just maybe

♪ And can't tie her shoeses?

♪ And dance by the light of the moon ♪

♪ And each and every birthday

♪ And gives me ice cream money? ♪

♪ And gives me ice cream money? ♪

♪ And I'm going insane

♪ And is stuck in the '80s?

♪ And is the family narc?

♪ And now that we're talking about it ♪

♪ And showers in a chair?

♪ And thinks there's an Easter Bunny? ♪

♪ Be happy ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪

♪ But I just couldn't tell her ♪

♪ But today's the day I can finally say ♪

♪ But today's the day I can finally say ♪

♪ Can't wait to pack these veggies in my bowl ♪

♪ Classy, bougie, ratchet

♪ Coming for to carry me home

♪ Doo doo doo doo doo ♪

♪ Doo‐dah, doo‐dah

♪ Findin' new skin tags

♪ Flying high above the clouds ♪

♪ Gargle, floss, and rinse‐spit after meals ♪

♪ Gran Torino ♪

♪ Gran Torino ♪

♪ Here's the sitch, I'm Mr. Mitch ♪

♪ I am free

♪ I am Jing ♪

♪ I am Jing, I am scared ♪

♪ I am Jing, I'm mixing ♪

♪ I can chew all the gum I want to ♪

♪ I can eat every sticky dessert ♪

♪ I can finally put anything in my mouth ♪

♪ I can get an MRI

♪ I can mix it into gummy bears ♪

♪ I can safely walk by magnets ♪

♪ I can smile without scaring babies ♪

♪ I can stir it up in tea

♪ I can walk through a lightning storm ♪

♪ I coddled you

♪ I don't care

♪ I got a metal‐free oral cavity ♪

♪ I got a metal‐free oral cavity ♪

♪ I got this feeling on the summer day ♪

♪ I had gummy bears for breakfast ♪

♪ I have a trusty hoe

♪ I just wanna put a gun

♪ I love it

♪ I love my son in every way, yeah ♪

♪ I make a big brownie

♪ I never hit so hard in love

♪ I really put my fist in my mouth ♪

♪ I swaddled you

♪ I think I am invisible?

♪ I wanna stand on the rooftop and ♪

♪ I wanna stand on the rooftop and shout ♪

♪ I wonder if I can put my fist in my mouth ♪

♪ I'd have sex with you if I could ♪

♪ I'm dancing on the table

♪ I'm sitting ♪

♪ I've got parsley

♪ I've waited for this moment for what feels like eternity ♪

♪ If you want your treat

♪ In my mouth

♪ Into the bridge, I watched, I let it burn ♪

♪ Killing me softly

♪ Lalala ♪

♪ Lalala ♪

♪ Lalala! ♪

♪ Look at me, I'm Kimberly

♪ Look left and right and all around ♪

♪ Making 'em bitchin' ♪

♪ Mouth

♪ My daddy

♪ My daddy

♪ My daddy

♪ My daddy

♪ My daughter

♪ My daughter

♪ My daughter

♪ My daughter

♪ My mom won't be so critical

♪ My name is Annie, and I'm here to say ♪

♪ No, no, no, no, no Okay, I'm ready.

♪ Now I'm skating on the placemats ♪

♪ Oh, yeah

♪ Or I'm gonna barf, blegh!

♪ Or you'll be dead meat

♪ Or you'll get gross gingivitis ♪

♪ Round and round, round and round ♪

♪ Sweet chariot

♪ Sweet little woman get along ♪

♪ Ta‐daaah

♪ That I get to be her dad?

♪ That I get to be her dad?

♪ That's filled with bleeding gums ♪

♪ The other kids won't be so critical ♪

♪ The wheels on the bus go round and round ♪

♪ The wheels on the bus go round and round ♪

♪ Then you F‐bombed my heart

♪ To think I might stop being so invisible? ♪

♪ Train kept a‐rolling all night long ♪

♪ Train kept a‐rolling all night long ♪

♪ Well, it hurts a little

♪ When you were gone

♪ Where we'll have some fun

♪ Where we'll have some fun

♪ Who works as a plumber and couldn't be more dumber? ♪

♪ Whoa, whoa, whoa

♪ Won't you come out tonight

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Yeah, I wre‐e‐e‐ecked you

♪ Yeah, I wre‐e‐e‐ecked you

♪ You can kick me in the face, and it won't even hurt ♪

♪ You should've been taking that PSAT ♪

♪ILikeToBootItBootIt.

$5 is all I need