Barb Wire Edit

A big one.

A business proposition.

A Congressional delegation out of Washington,

A Congressional smart grenade.

A gesture.

A girl's got to do what a girl's got to do.

A little gun running here, some bail jumping there,

A million dollars is pocket change to what's going down.

A rather spectacular double homicide in the old harbor.

A safe escort to the old airport.

A traitor named Cora D.

Act natural? That's easier said than done.

Actually, I don't feel much of anything anymore.

Add it to my tab, Miss Kopetski.

Ah, blow me.

Ah, Colonel Pryzer,

Ah, come on, babe.

Ah, if she's more to your pleasing...

Ah, Mr. Krebs.

Ah! I think I better go down and start checking some more IDs.

Ah.

Alive, Krebs represents your investment in his bail bond.

All of it. Come on. And the rest!

All of this is over a set of Bausch + Lombs?

All of this is over capturing an enemy of the Republic,

All right, let's go!

All right, phase two of the deal.

Allow me to introduce our hostess, the inimitable...

An H IV derivative known as "Red Ribbon."

An hour before sundown.

An urgent request to contact the Resistance,

And a badly scented proposal of marriage.

And a million dollars bounty on the head of the good doctor

And as a duly authorized officer of the court,

And as your bar is non discriminating

And from Samantha to Kyle, "You thieving, murderous bastard.

And get on that plane.

And I came ready for anything the Congressionals could lob at me.

And I'm here to tell you, it only feels that way.

And in this world, you got to use everything you got.

And let's pretend she's right here in your arms.

And not to mention the $750,000 credit on the debit card.

And now's not the time to explain.

And she can be very mean.

And stuff it back down your throat.

And take care of Camille, okay?

And that the Congressionals planned

And that's where I lived for three years.

And the Congressionals have a million dollar bounty on his head.

And the Congressionals want it back.

And the toll collectors quite difficult.

And then I thought, "I wonder if she'd like to do some."

And then what's left, memories, dreams.

And will be helping her leave the Congressional territories.

And, Barb, it's a pleasure to see you, too.

And, Barb, you've got to know, all I ever wanted back in Seattle

Another offer to buy the bar,

Any bright ideas how?

Any of these men Schmitz?

Any word yet on our traitorous doctor, Cora D?

Anybody?

Apartment 472. One guest.

Apartment 472. One guest.

Apparently, Colonel,

Are we cutting it close enough?

Are we going out?

Are you a cop?

Are you Barbara Kopetski?

Are you coming or not?

Are you kidding? They'll have every exit covered.

Arrest her.

Arrest him.

As in lenses?

As long as it takes, citizen.

As long as it takes.

As you wish, Colonel. As you wish.

Attention, attention.

Attention!

Axel, over here.

Axel, take the wheel.

Axel!

Baby, you tell me it's late,

Back off, Axel.

Bad part of town.

Barb has a very keen sense of commerce.

Barb, how lovely to see you.

Barb, I'm gonna have to ask you to drop your weapons.

Barb, there's more to this story than meets the eye.

Barb, this is my wife, Cora D.

Barb, we have to go now!

Barb, where are the contact lenses?

Barb, you of all people should know that.

Barb!

Barb.

Barb's retired.

Ben Jones, eh?

Best in the house, as you requested.

Big Fatso.

Bingo. Mr. Krebs.

Boom, boom, boom.

Bounty hunting is an ugly, unpredictable business.

Breeding, that is.

Bring you in contact with all levels of society.

Bubbly on the house.

But I didn't know how friendly.

But I do make the occasional arrest without slaughter.

But I get a million dollars bounty on your head,

But I have more important things on my mind.

But I thought you got some air last night.

But I'm sure you'll be very pleased with the special order.

But nevertheless, they were my men.

But vaporizing your springy ass is gonna be a real pleasure.

But you know I only like big, fat women.

But you may have heard of her as Cora D.

But your words just don't match your thoughts.

But, listen, the mission took months and I just thought after all that time,

By the way, Barb,

Camille, package check.

Camille, sit.

Camille.

Can you tell me why Cora D's going to Steel Harbor?

Canadian.

Candy from a baby.

Cash for the lenses, right there.

Chanel No. 5. Am I correct?

Change of plans. Let's go.

Charlie Kopetski sent us.

Charlie Kopetski.

Charlie!

Charlie?

Charlie.

Charlie's down there.

Check him. Yes, sir.

Check his ID.

Chief Willis, arrest these people.

Cigarettes and a drink and I'll be fine.

Citizen approved by all governments.

Citizen, I abhor torture.

Cognitive impressions, usually those closest to death first,

Colonel Pryzer,

Colonel Pryzer, Alexander Willis, Director of Police Operations.

Colonel Pryzer, Executive Council on line two.

Come again.

Come on, Barb. Give him a thrill.

Come on, get in, get in.

Come on, honey, get it all off!

Come on, honey. Come on, all of it. Yeah, there you go.

Come on, make me stand up for queen and country.

Come on, move your ass.

Come on.

Coming right down.

Command a bit more respect than that, Barb.

Commence scan.

Congressional or U N.

Contact lenses?

Cora D, I admire you.

Cora has the vaccine to Red Ribbon in her system.

Cora, there's quite a lot of things I need to tell you.

Cover her!

Curly. Music.

Cut the shit. Where's my money?

Damn, but that don't just tug at my heart strings.

Damn, Willis, we've got to do something.

Darling.

Dead, he's toxic waste.

Deal. I'm not done yet.

Deal. You got the lenses?

Destination Quebec, gate two.

Destination? Quebec.

Did you hear the Congressionals just took over Denver?

Did you wash your hands?

Do I look disenchanted to you?

Do I look surprised?

Do I make myself clear?

Do they, Dr. Devonshire?

Do you have a girl back home?

Do you miss her?

Do you remember what happened in Topeka, Kansas?

Do yourself a favor. Just give 'em back and say you're sorry.

Does the word "overkill" mean anything to you?

Does this constitute an emergency?

Doesn't have you in her appointment book,

Don't call me "babe."

Don't call me "babe."

Don't drink when you want to forget.

Don't I?

Don't lose the clip.

Don't move!

Don't worry about it.

Don't you just love it when a plan comes together?

Dr. Corrina Devonshire, 44791.

Dr. Corrina Devonshire, Cora D,

Dr. Devonshire was privy to some of the most

Drink when you want to remember, Barb.

Dry Martinis and a Cuban cigar.

East sector is clear. Is there anyone in the west?

Even in Washington, we've heard of Barb Wire.

Evening, Officer.

Everybody's chasing their tail.

Everyone stay where you are.

Everything go okay?

Everything's negotiable.

Exactly. You deal with everybody.

Excuse me, Barb.

Excuse me, boss. Trouble in the kitchen.

Excuse me, Curly.

Excuse me, gentlemen.

Excuse me, Miss Wire.

Extradited and sent to Washington by now.

Fat chance.

Fifteen hundred.

Fifteen hundred.

Final seating, Flight 647.

Find 'em now!

Finders keepers.

Fine.

Floor it!

Follow him!

For a while.

For Charlie?

For Christ's sake, will you just name a price!

For the million dollar bounty.

For turning you both over to the Congressionals.

For what?

From the beginning.

From the United Front trying to get even.

Full medical. Checked yesterday.

Gentlemen, I'll take those weapons.

Gentlemen, the steaks are excellent tonight.

Gentlemen. Here you are, sir.

Get a life.

Get her off! Get her off of me!

Get in line.

Get in.

Get me out of Steel Harbor. Canada, maybe.

Get out and don't come back!

Get out!

Get out.

Get out.

Give me a goddamn drink!

Give me some more.

Give me three minutes and meet me downstairs.

Give me your gun.

Go ahead, go.

Go in, laddies!

Go out through the back.

Go to the old factory district.

Go!

Go!

Go!

God damn it!

God damn it.

God damn it. Where are the lenses?

Goddamn it, Barb, I can't.

Goddamn you, Willis, I'll break you in half.

Goddamn. Customs police.

Good luck, Doc.

Good luck, soldier.

Good luck.

Good one.

Good.

Good. Camille, outside.

Goodbye, Axel.

Goodbye, Axel.

Goodbye, Willis.

Goodbye.

Got one?

Guess you didn't hear.

Half the money?

Hang on.

Hang on.

Have a nice day.

Have it your way.

Have you ever tried to drive into Steel Harbor?

Haven't you heard?

He admitted he was a liar and a thief.

He doesn't have any retinas, you morons!

He has no visual data for that period.

He has the lenses

He said he's sorry, but you got to get out of here.

He told me he had to go and see an old friend of his.

He was a drunk with sticky fingers, but at least he was honest.

He was trying to give me just $50.

He wasn't.

He's expecting me.

He's fat, wears a red suit.

He's not here. He's not coming.

He's over here. All right, let's go.

Hello, Barb.

Hello, Charlie.

Helping her out of the country, to Canada.

Her DNA holds the antidote to our greatest biochemical weapon.

Her escape could jeopardize our strongest defensive action yet.

Her face has changed. You won't recognize her.

Her name is Dr. Corrina Devonshire,

Her present appearance is of no consequence.

Here it is in slow motion, Colonel.

Here they come!

Here's your little pride and joy.

Hey, come on!

Hey, handsome, want some company?

Hey, hey, hey.

Hey, I had to work fast.

Hey, I still believe in fighting for what's right.

Hey, I'm irresistible to females.

Hey, nice nuts.

Hey, they don't belong to us.

Hey, wait up!

Hey, watch 'em.

Hey, you want some company?

Hey!

Hey! Head back.

Hi, hi. Uh...

Hold him! Hey!

Hold that plane!

Hold your fire!

Hold your fire!

Holy shit!

Honey, pay this woman.

How about half a mill, Canadian?

How about something a little less comfortable?

How am I supposed to get on the plane now?

How are they getting her into the city?

How come I don't get to drive?

How could I know that?

How could you?

How did you get in here? Where's my dog?

How impressive.

How long is this gonna take?

How long is this gonna take?

How many more? Give me two.

How many times do I have to tell you? I don't take sides.

How many?

How much is this gonna cost me?

How much?

How romantic.

How the whole city was wiped out?

How touching.

How utterly goddamn heroic.

How's the crowd, honey?

How's the king of the underworld?

However, due to circumstances outside of our control...

Hurry.

I believe you've already met...

I came here to do a job.

I can assure you,

I can explain.

I can hardly wait.

I can help.

I can tell you he was Resistance,

I can't believe I'm actually dancing with the Barb Wire.

I can't tell you how eager we are to have you back.

I conveyed your offer to her.

I could make it worth their while.

I could only come up with half the money.

I could swear I just heard an old voice from the battlefield.

I couldn't see it when it was clean.

I defected to the Resistance.

I didn't know you were open for lunch.

I do believe I'm falling in love.

I do believe that I'm being extorted here.

I do hope you'll think about our offer.

I do.

I don't buy. I don't sell.

I don't even know how I feel.

I don't have to make anymore arrests tonight for, say, the usual $3,000.

I don't know how you do things in Washington, Colonel,

I don't moonlight.

I don't smoke.

I don't take sides.

I don't think talking to Barb's gonna be such a good idea.

I got a business proposition for you.

I got something to deal.

I Got You, Babe.

I guess I didn't.

I guess it's bad timing for both of us.

I had no choice.

I had no direct knowledge of that operation.

I had to do a little moonlighting to keep my bar running.

I have a bar to run.

I have a proposition.

I have no experience in running a bar.

I hope you'll join us.

I knew Charlie was still friendly with the Resistance,

I knew it. I know I shouldn't have come here.

I know I double crossed you.

I like the new sound system.

I made a mistake. It happens.

I must protest.

I need her help, Charlie.

I need her to put us in touch with local Resistance.

I need something more conclusive than a bunch of blurry images...

I need you.

I never thought I would see the day

I never thought I'd meet the legend in person.

I never wanted to hurt you.

I picked them up on the boulevard.

I really do, but tomorrow's payday.

I remember how I felt,

I remember when you believed in something.

I said cash.

I said get to the back of the line.

I said they're safe.

I should blow your head off right now.

I should have done it.

I think you'll find our guests from Washington

I think you're confusing respect with fear.

I think you've had enough already.

I thought I dug it deep enough.

I thought I told you never to come back.

I thought I'd be hearing from you real soon.

I thought you were getting to the point.

I told you everything I know.

I told you.

I told you.

I want safe passage for me and Charlie all the way through the unoccupied zone.

I want to get some air.

I want to trade the lenses.

I want to trade them to you.

I want you to know I had nothing to do with what happened to Charlie.

I was bad.

I was chief of medical research for the Congressional Directorate.

I was gonna sell 'em, but my buyer fell through.

I was just better left a part of your past.

I was looking for Barb or Charlie Kopetski.

I will make my offer in person.

I will personally rip your heart out of your ass

I will.

I wish you could see this mess.

I wouldn't be cleaning up your mess

I wouldn't be here in the first place, would I?

I wouldn't do that if I were you, Krebs.

I wouldn't have come here unless I had to.

I'd have to staff a few more men here, there.

I'd like to talk to you about coming back.

I'd rather join my friend.

I'll add that to my list.

I'll be there. I promise.

I'll contact their local authorities immediately.

I'll get my hands dirty for you again.

I'll meet you at the first toll entering the unoccupied zone

I'll meet you at the plane. I promise.

I'll need one of the bodies.

I'll take care of Charlie.

I'll take care of your problem, citizen.

I'll take half your daughter.

I'll talk. I'll talk.

I'm afraid there's been a slight problem.

I'm Barb Wire.

I'm coming.

I'm commander here. They call me Spike.

I'm fully aware of that, citizen.

I'm giving it to you.

I'm going back to the front lines tomorrow and I was wondering...

I'm gonna miss you too, Curly.

I'm gonna miss you.

I'm in a position to broker their sale.

I'm in this for me only. Right, Big Fatso?

I'm just a waiter, for Christ's sake.

I'm looking for a man named Krebs and I've got 24 hours to find him.

I'm neutral. I'm a businesswoman, Colonel.

I'm not gonna pander to that mythic name bullshit.

I'm not surprised you don't believe me.

I'm out of your price range.

I'm so glad to hear that.

I'm sorry, boss. Is this a good moment to talk about the payroll?

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm still waiting to hear from Miss Wire.

I'm sure that your business dealings

I'm sure you'll have very strong, smart children.

I'm the man, I'm the man, I'm the man.

I'm the one who's getting you out of here.

I'm thinking about it.

I'm tight with the management, here.

I'm unarmed.

I've been saving my lunch money.

Identification can always be made by retinal scanning.

Idiot.

If anybody would know where Schmitz, she would.

If Cora D escapes,

If Cora D were to exit this charming free city,

If I knew, you think I'd tell you?

If I were you I wouldn't do that.

If it isn't Axel, the freedom fighter and the famous Cora D.

If it isn't Barb the Buxom.

If it was a pleasure, Schmitz, I'd charge more.

If it wasn't for your almost complete incompetence,

If one more person calls me "babe"...

If the Resistance wants to know where those lenses are,

If we ever get out of this alive, Barb, I'll kill you.

If you'd stopped her from escaping Washington in the first place.

Illicit if you can get it, and listen to the music.

Image is present.

Image is recording.

In a globally catastrophic project.

In an emergency, pull that yellow lever.

In my office. I'll be waiting for you.

Infractions will be dealt with severely.

Initially, we married on paper purely for identification purposes.

Is there another way out of here?

Is this one that makes it go up and down?

Issue a warrant for the arrest of Barb Wire.

Issue a warrant?

It can kill you in 12 hours.

It doesn't matter who I am, but this is Cora D.

It followed me all the way to my foxhole.

It looks that way.

It took us a while, but we found Krebs.

It was Axel that helped me get out of Washington.

It was the middle of the Second American Civil War.

It's a Congressional matter. I can assure you, citizen,

It's a front for the Resistance.

It's a gold debit card with 750,000 credit on it.

It's a little sticky.

It's a messy business tonight, Miss Wire.

It's a pleasure doing business with you, Barb.

It's a pleasure to see you.

It's a road block.

It's about retinal contact lenses.

It's all clear here.

It's all very legal. We have a warrant.

It's as good as cash.

It's at the old airport, on the other side of the unoccupied zone.

It's Charlie. I'm here.

It's embarrassing.

It's her first night, and I haven't had a chance to feel her out.

It's not about Krebs anymore.

It's not just about money, you know.

It's not picking up his thoughts.

It's not that easy, Doc. We can't find him anywhere.

It's them. Let's go.

It's very profitable.

Joe, see if you can get some food down Charlie's neck.

Just get me out and they're yours.

Just give me my drink.

Just how far out are we going to go?

Just keep Charlie out from under the tables.

Just keep them away from the weapons check, Curly.

Just one.

Keep it to yourself.

Keeps her legend alive.

Krebs was Resistance.

Krebs.

Krebs. Cora D can't be far.

Kris Kringle.

Last call, Flight 647.

Lawrence Crabtree. 57239.

Let her through.

Let's go!

Let's go.

Let's go.

Let's have them.

Let's hope Resistance are here.

Let's make a deal.

Like I was kicked in the stomach.

Like these?

Like you don't know what I'm talking about.

Listen to me, Barb, we need your help.

Listen, Barbara Kopetski,

Listen. Carefully.

Look at it this way, Schmitz.

Look lively, Barb. They could be here any minute.

Look out! She's got a grenade!

Look who's here.

Look, Barb.

Look, boss, I hate to keep bringing this up,

Look, I know this is awkward for all of us.

Look, I need your help. Rot in hell.

Look, we just stick with the plan, okay?

Look, we know that Schmitz was here last night.

Lovely, you brought company.

Lucky for me, you don't hold a grudge.

Malfunction, malfunction.

Malfunction, malfunction.

Maybe you shouldn't.

Maybe, but I'm tough.

Me and Charlie, we're history.

Me, too.

Merry Christmas!

Mind scan up on screen one, Colonel.

Miss Kopetski died in the war.

Miss Wire doesn't accept this kind of job.

Miss Wire may know the whereabouts of the retinal contact lenses.

Miss Wire's private secretary, Camille, here,

Miss, two bourbons.

Mmm hmm.

Mmm. Of course not.

Moi? Bullshit arrests?

Most unpleasant.

Mr. Santo, the package has arrived.

Mr. Schmitz.

My money is not good enough for her?

My special order?

My table?

Name's Kringle.

Naturally, she declined.

Neither do I.

Never heard of him.

Never looked better.

Next.

Nice work, Mr. Big Fatso.

Nice.

No chit chat?

No more valentines, Curly.

No, Barb, you can't.

No, I can't.

No, I didn't.

No, no, no, no.

No, the Congressionals are still looking for Krebs. We know that for sure.

No.

No.

No.

No.

No.

No. He'll be here.

Nope.

Normally, I don't get emotional about my work,

Not an easy life.

Not only do I get the lenses,

Not so fast. This is our ticket to Europe.

Now close your eyes and turn around.

Now what are we waiting for? Let's get Schmitz.

Now what?

Now, find a reason to search the Hammerhead.

Now, granted, they were homicidal thugs,

Now, here's a little rhythm for you heartsick boys and girls.

Now, I was directly but unknowingly involved

Now, if you know where the lenses are...

Now, we need your help, Barb. The cause needs your help.

Now, what the hell do you want with me?

Now, where the hell is William Krebs?

Now, where's Dr. Corrina Devonshire?

Now, you don't want to see her roll over, do you?

Of course it was a vital part of our contract to...

Of course not.

Of readable thought data, Colonel.

Oh, and when you see her, tell her I only had two.

Oh, Barb, we're so close. Don't you feel the magic?

Oh, Charlie, you worry too much.

Oh, cheer up, baby brother. We're rich.

Oh, Curly, relax. You're a natural.

Oh, God damn it!

Oh, God!

Oh, God.

Oh, ho, ho. Slight change in plans.

Oh, I wouldn't be here if I knew you were coming.

Oh, it's awful.

Oh, jeez, we're gonna die.

Oh, Miss Wire.

Oh, my God.

Oh, no!

Oh, now don't give me that surprised look.

Oh, now, ain't that sweet.

Oh, shit!

Oh, shit. Damn!

Oh, so that's why I didn't get an invitation to your wedding?

Oh, speaking of money, Barb,

Oh, that's sexual harassment, Chief.

Oh, Willis, what's with the monkey suit?

Oh, yeah?

Oh! What are you doing?

Oh.

Okay, I guess I deserved that.

Okay, I love you. Bye.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. Do you want some advice?

Okay. Okay, let's go.

Okay. Whatever you say, Charlie.

Okay. You can have him.

On my tab, of course.

On the other side is the unoccupied zone.

One million Canadian.

One of those overly romanticized Resistance names.

Only UN authorized and identified personnel

Ooh, donuts.

Ooh, nice jewelry, Barb.

Ooh, unoccupied zone.

Ooh. I have an idea.

Oops.

Or suffer at your leisure.

Or you can join your little friend.

Our little mind reading device doesn't lie.

Painfully compromised.

Pay the help, for God's sakes.

Perhaps we can do business.

Please don't kill me.

Please, be polite.

Please, not in public.

Please.

Please.

Port Steel Harbor.

Preferably one without a head wound.

Put him on.

Put that down!

Put these in.

Record it.

Regarding the whereabouts of certain pair of contact lenses.

Relax, Curly, I got it covered.

Relax, Schmitz. You can only die once.

Reset sensors.

Retinal lenses?

Retinal scan verified.

Retinal scan verified.

Retinal scan verified.

Retinal scan verified.

Retinal scan verified.

Right this way, Mr. Santo.

Rocket launcher is armed.

Ruben Tenenbaum. 10811.

Rumor has it that you used to fight with the Resistance.

Run! Get out of here!

Save it for the U N.

Scan 'em.

Scan 'em.

Schmitz was aiming to turn Krebs over to the Congressionals

Schmitz was here last night, trying to trade them for a trip to Canada.

Second toll, dead ahead.

See a badge?

Sell yourself to the highest bidder?

Sensitive military secrets of the Congressional Republic.

She belongs to me.

She intends to make a crossing into Canada

She is as tender as Tuscan veal.

She knows I was supposed to meet her here.

She must be captured alive at any cost.

She sent me instead.

She took Seattle a hell of a lot harder than I did.

She'll never be able to get on that plane without the contact lenses.

She's Chinese.

She's connecting with a Resistance contact named Krebs.

She's going to Steel Harbor, the free city.

She's had plastic surgery.

She's home free. Mission completed.

She's involved.

She's meeting members of the Resistance.

She's with a freedom fighter named Axel.

Shit!

Shit.

Shit. Come on.

Show us what you got!

Shut up.

Shut up. My fee.

Sir, the scanner's broken, sir.

Sir, we're not open yet.

So if someone knew where Krebs was,

So sit back and enjoy someone or something

So we're checking a few IDs.