Swingers (1996) Edit

A couple of high class guys like me and you.

A couple of high rollers like yourself?

A day.

Actually, I don't have West Coast representation as of yet.

Actually, I haven't heard an official "no" yet.

Ah. How rude of me. I never... I never gave you... the tour.

Ah.. I don't know.

All I do, man, is stare at their mouth and wrinkle my eyebrows...

All of the shit that didn't kill us is only

All right already, okay? I'll put my suit on. Grab the wheel. Hold it steady.

All right, all right.

All right, great. Nice, baby.

All right, I'll pause it. Jesus Christ. Like you scored all day.

All right, listen. I took out $300, but I'm only betting with 100.

All right, man, I guess you're not home.

All right, man.

All right, ready. Mean Streets?

All right, stop. See that? That table? That's where we make our scene.

All right?

All right? Look out the window.

All right. Sure.

All you're doin' is letting them know that it's working.

Alright. I want you to go over to that girl and I want you to get those digits.

Alright. She's a sweet girl and I love her to pieces...

Always.

An obscure French philosophical reference?

And everything that is past is prologue to this.

And for you?

And he said I looked just like her.

And I figure if we buy a lot of chips, though, the pit boss will see us...

And I figured if you could make it, then I could make it too.

And I say to him, "Well, how old exactly is the role of brother?"

And I see that all the kids are signed in for the exact same role as me.

And if we're not there we'll be at the Three of Clubs, all right?

And if you tell the bartender to go easy on the water...

And it says here, "Breakfast anytime."

And it's like I'm supposed to be all happy, 'cause she's wearing a backpack.

And it's one of these Hollywood clubs and there's no sign.

And no matter how hard I try, I won't...

And one for my boy Mikey here.

And see where it goes.

And some more olives for our little friend here.

And somehow I turn out to be a big sweetie, okay?

And that you wanna party.

And the agent said to me afterwards that he thought...

And the funny thing is...

And then I took you and introduced you to my manager.

And then we're either going to the Lava Lounge for Sinatra Night...

And then we're gonna go look for this other party.

And then when she comes back, make like I just pretended to forget about her?

And there's all these little kids sitting in the waiting room with me.

And told her I was a race car driver or something.

And you know what? I can cry on cue.

And you look like you gamble a lot, they give you free shit.

And you should call me tomorrow, or in two days, whatever.

And you're gonna say it sucks, and we're all gonna leave...

And you're pokin' at it, man. You're pokin' at it.

And you're sweatin' some lawn jockey.

Any other Disney character would be fine.

Any scotch will do, as long as it's not a blend, of course.

Any way, and also, sorry to call so late...

Anyhow, my number's 2 1

Anyway, I probably should have waited two days.

Anyway, I really liked him. And then one day he told me I was ugly.

Anyway, my number...

At 9:00, and I'm going to this thing.

At her, like the funny vibe.

Aww. What the hell are you kickin' me for?

Baby, don't talk that way.

Baby, look at me. Look at me.

Baby, she wants to party. She wants to.

Baby, that was money. Tell me that wasn't money.

Baby, this is what we came here for.

Baby, we're gonna get laid.

Baby, will you relax just for a minute here?

Baby, you are so money, and you don't even know it.

Back down? He called me a bitch.

Back in their day, this place was a real contender,

Bad man.

Beautiful babies. You want to come with?

Because she's with somebody else.

Because you know why? Because you make it happen on the bets.

Because you... you lived with it for so long.

Before I finished leaving my number.

Big brother or little brother?

Big fuckin' deal.

Blast him! Come on, hit him!

But all the parties and all the bars, they all suck.

But fuck her, man you gotta get on with your life.

But I bet somewhere inside of her there is a very, very special dream.

But I look young, Mike. Do I look young, girls?

But I think three days is kinda money.

But if you call too soon, you might scare off a nice baby who's ready to party.

But now it's like everyone in town waits two days.

But now they'll appreciate the business.

But she did. And she's with somebody else now.

But talkin' about it and thinkin' about it all the time, it's depressing.

But that was pretty, Sue. Check this out on the instant replay.

But the kind of crying that's like we're trying not to cry.

But the truth of the matter was, you saw my picture, you saw my tape.

But then, eventually, you really will forget about her.

But this happens to be a $100 minimum bet table.

But you can't do anything to make her want to come back.

But you were still at the Dresden when I left, so I knew I'd get your machine.

But, really, he had his own things going on.

But, well, this one time this is really stupid

By the way, I'm Goofy. Send more money."

C'mon. man. If you're wearing a suit,

Can I call you right back?

Can I check my messages real quick?

Can I come see you some time?

Can I get you something else?

Can you believe it?

Can't make any more excuses for myself.

Can't you just talk to me for five minutes?

Cavalier.

Changing 300. Three hundred.

Charles, this is my friend Rob from back East. He just moved out here.

Chelios steals to Roenick.

Christy was nice.

Claws, man. And you're thinkin' to yourself...

Cocktails?

Come on in.

Come on, bitch. You little fuckin' pussy!

Come on, Daddy, let's get us a drink.

Come on, man. Come on, peaches.

Come on, Mike, you got to get out with the beautiful babies.

Come on, Mike.

Come on, open up.

Come on, pick it up and buzz me in, buddy.

Come on, punk, do it.

Come on, you little party girl. That's it. Come on. Fun little games?

Come on! Yeah, I got a fuckin' problem, motherfucker!

Come to our gene pool.

Could we first see if what happens when we play it cool?

Could we get out of here, alright? Because I'm not gonna pay for a room.

Could we just go, please? Could we go?

Could you not mess with me right now?

Darling, I think everything looks absolutely wonderful.

Darwinism at its best.

Dead heat after one hole. It's turning into quite a rivalry.

Definitely. Two days is like industry standard.

Did she call?

Did you even hear what she said?

Did you get turned down for Goofy?

Did you... did you just walk in, or were you listening all along?

Didn't occur to you?

Didn't occur to you.

Didn't you tell me that I should be patient with my career?

Different, I don't know, schools or philosophies, they all can fight each other.

Dinner at the Apollo. Me and you.

Do I know you? I mean, where do I know you from?

Do you ever play out here? I'd love to see you sometime.

Do you know how hard it is to not call you?

Do you know what I mean? Like we're not trying to... whatever. It was very cool.

Do you think she's gonna leave us and go tell her pit boss on us?

Do you wanna hit the town tonight?

Do you want me to drive you to your car?

Don't apologize for it.

Don't ever call me again.

Don't give me that shit, Mike. I think she likes you.

Don't give me that shit. You know exactly what you lost. What'd you drop?

Don't remind me.

Don't tell me we didn't make it. We made it. We are here.

Double down.

Dude, check it out, dude. I swear to God, it's fuckin' on.

Dude, do not...

Dude, get the fuck off me. I'm not kidding.

Dude, I'm about to do my thing with the thing.

Dude, it's Pink Dot. Would you buzz him in? Hit nine.

Eighteen. Good. Eighteen's good.

Espresso. An espresso. Yes, that's my drink. That's probably it.

Every goal you're gonna watch the instant replay?

Everybody steals from everybody. That's movies.

Everyone's really hoping makes it happen.

Excellent.

Except they're surrounded by a bunch of drunken, horny assholes.

Excuse me?

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Excuse me. We have... We're in a little bit of a hurry.

Fantastic.

Fine, fine.

Fine, I'll ask her. You want me to ask her?

Fine, I'm an asshole. But you know what? You're the big winner tonight, Mikey.

For at least five minutes.

For some reason the cool bars in Hollywood have to be hard

For the role of brother."

Forget about her or just pretend to forget about her.

Four days? I don't know about four days.

Fuck rep, man. I got a callback tomorrow.

Fuck!

Fuckin' A right, it's not like New York. Out here you can avoid trouble.

Fuckin' blood came out of his fuckin' mouth. It was nasty, man.

Fucking bitch! What did you do that for?

Gentlemen, out of Glenfiddich.

Get off. I'm serious. Don't fuckin' do that shit.

Get the fuck off me!

Gin time.

Girls love that kind of stuff.

Give me a second here. May I have a minute?

Give me some fuckin' money. I'm not paying again.

God bless him.

God bless that kid.

God bless you guys.

God, I can't believe the women in this city.

God, I sound like such a schoolgirl. It's just, they have this thing, okay?

God, this is such bullshit, man. This is bullshit!

Good. This place is dead anyway, man. Let's do it.

Great. Good. Great day.

Gretzky's a little bitch.

Guy behind the guy.

Guys like me and you gotta kick it here. Old school.

Hang on, Voltaire.

Have him come look. Have him take off his shoes.

Have you fucked once?

Have you gotten laid once since you moved out here?

He don't look it. No, he's mean. I seen him in a fight once.

He had a guy and was fuckin' smackin' his head into the curb, like his mouth.

He has it under control.

He is a fuckin' bitch. He ain't gonna do anything, guys.

He really was reminded by me...

He said that?

He said, "I just want her to be happy."

He said, "I saw big brother come in here." Fuckin' great, right?

He says, "Trent, when you walked in this room...

He says, "You walked in with the role, you nailed it, you're great."

He was really cute, and he wore Lee Jeans. They said "Lee."

He'll comp us all sorts of free shit; That's how it works over there.

He's great, isn't he?

He's right, Sue. You don't need to carry a gat.

Headache and I don't want to talk about him.

Hello, you have four messages.

Hello?

Her before, all the times we've hung out.

Here it comes.

Hey, Curt.

Hey, gorgeous, it's Trent calling.

Hey, hey, Tony. Whadda ya say, man?

Hey, hold still. Hold on. It's the fuckin' Pink Dot guy. Hold on.

Hey, how're you doin'?

Hey, how're you doing? Oh my God! What are you doing here?

Hey, how's it goin'? What's up?

Hey, it's been two days. You should call that Nikki girl.

Hey, man, you're not from here. Alright? You don't know how it is.

Hey, Mike, if you want to talk about Michelle, give me

Hey, Mikey, it's Trent. You home? You there?

Hey, Mikey, you should call that girl Nikki. It's been two days.

Hey, Rob.

Hey, Sue.

Hey, there she is, the most special lady in town, right?

Hey, this is Mike. Leave a message after the beep.

Hey, this is Mike. Leave a message after the beep.

Hey, whadda ya say, man?

Hey, what's up, Lisa?

Hey, you're a fuckin' bitch! You're a fuckin' bitch!

Hi, can I get a Dewars on the rocks?

Hi, friends.

Hi, Lisa. I'm Trent. It's nice to meet you.

Hi, Nikki, this is Mike again.

Hi, Nikki, this is Mike. Could you just, call me when you get in?

Hi, this is Nikki. Leave a message.

Hi, this is Nikki. Leave a message.

Hi, this is Nikki. Leave a message.

Hi, this is Nikki. Leave a message.

Hi, this is Nikki. Leave a message.

Hi, this is Nikki. Leave a message.

Hi. How are you ladies doing this evening?

Hi. I'll have a Dewars on the rocks, please.

Hi. Nikki, this is Mike.

Hi. You didn't have to get off of the other line.

Hold on.

Honestly you should probably wait three days before you call her.

How 'bout now? Is she looking over here now?

How am I gonna tell my parents?

How can you even compare the two, man?

How did you get over it? I mean... How long did it take?

How good am I doin'?

How long are you guys gonna wait to call your babies?

How to kill the bunny! Do you know what I mean.

How was it hard?

How well am I doin'?

How you doin', Anna? Good to see you. I'll see you soon. Alright.

I always thought Caesar's was more the dope spot.

I am unbelievable. Look at it.

I apologized, bought 'em some chicken and waffles. It's totally fine.

I been hatin' myself for the last few days.

I been here six months, all I got to show for it is black lung.

I call my agent up. She says, "Trent, they asked for you specifically."

I called 'cause I heard you might be moving back to Queens.

I can count that for you.

I can't afford any more than that, all right?

I can't believe what an asshole you are.

I can't even get this guy to notice me.

I could just ask him to dance?

I could've been out with Sue one night drinking

I didn't even want it. I just wanted to order it.

I didn't get Deep Space Nine.

I didn't make it.

I didn't see Trent Walker come in here."

I didn't want you to think I was weird or desperate.

I didn't.

I do. I do. Good for you, Mikey.

I don't care if I end up with her or one of her beautiful baby friends.

I don't even tell them about anything I'm close on anymore.

I don't even understand why they don't have any signs.

I don't even want to fuckin' talk to you right now.

I don't have to be liked by everyone.

I don't know how to kill the bunny." With this, you don't know

I don't know if they're talking about how hard it is to be adopted...

I don't know what the big deal is.

I don't know, man.

I don't know, man. She just... she didn't really do it for me.

I don't know. I called you Monday.

I don't know. I mean, I couldn't.

I don't know. Sometimes it still hurts.

I don't know. We're better friends for it. All right?

I don't remember you ever leaving long enough to make a phone call to anybody.

I don't remember. What does she look like? Then I'll ask if we fucked.

I don't talk about her that much.

I don't think I've ever met her before. I would definitely remember this one.

I don't think we're interrupting anything.

I don't want you to be the guy in the PG 13 movie...

I figured, they make movies in LA, not in Wisconsin, so I moved here.

I finally hold up my finger, like give me a minute here.

I got a pen in my car.

I got an agent that specializes in magicians.

I got it! Oh, my heavens. Thank you!

I got some friends I wanna go meet. I'll talk to you later.

I gotta use the phone.

I guess you could call it that two days.

I have a calling card.

I have a calling card. It won't cost anything.

I have a new booking agent, though, so I'm part of the whole Vegas circuits.

I have to get out there sooner or later, right? So I gotta go now.

I have to.

I haven't seen you for two days.

I heard 'em both talking. Both those girls thought you were money.

I heard he drives a carriage around Central Park or something.

I heard they did that whole thing for under ten grand.

I hit.

I just called 'cause it sounded like your machine might've cut me off...

I just called to say that I had a great time...

I just didn't wanna do anything tonight.

I just don't think she liked me in that way.

I just got out of a six year relationship, okay?

I just happened to run into her number.

I just need a little more time.

I just wanna know what the advantages are.

I just want to know if you might want to go with me.

I just wanted you to have a good time, that's all.

I just wanted you to know that.

I keep thinking of my girlfriend.

I killed for that job.

I know for a fact that you haven't. You know how I know?

I know she does.

I know what you're saying, man. I just don't know what to tell you.

I know where it is. Starbucks.

I know, but it's $200. It's blood money.

I know, the new places down on the strip,

I know!

I know.

I left someone really special behind.

I like quiche. How's that?

I look up, everyone rips up in applause.

I lost, okay? How could you say "always"?

I may as well have just said, "Let me jump your ignorant bones."

I mean, at first you're gonna pretend to forget about her.

I mean, does it have to be Goofy?

I mean, I could, like, forget about her.

I mean, I pick up the phone every night, whenever that commercial comes on.

I mean, I sort of freelanced on my own, kind like, found my own things.

I mean, not for six years or anything, but I've been there.

I mean, six years is a long time.

I mean, yeah. Do you have something to write on?

I mean, you really shouldn't leave without getting something for free.

I mean, you're telling me that your life sucks.

I met you at the... at the Dresden tonight.

I might buy a car, I think. You know, a foreign car.

I miss you, Mike.

I need to...

I never get to play.

I really want to catch up with you, but I have to take the call.

I said watch where you're going, bitch.

I served you an espresso at Starbucks.

I should have said renaissance. Age of enlightenment. I...

I shouldn't. It's a weeknight.

I spend half the night talkin' to some girl who's lookin' around the room...

I started crying, and my teacher was, like...

I still haven't told them I didn't get the series.

I think about things.

I think I'm looking like the money, like the bomb, right?

I think that it might be that you may be just a little bit old...

I think you're great, but...

I think, kids were hitting each other or something, man.

I thought you said we're gonna wear suits.

I thought you'd appreciate that.

I took a ballroom class with Michelle.

I took the Kings to the cup.

I totally mentioned her. I totally mentioned you.

I walked around for an hour with that stupid scotch on my tray.

I want you to be like the guy in the rated R movie, you know?

I want you to run along, 'cause I'll be timing you.

I was out of line. I was drunk, my adrenaline was goin'.

I wish they still had fights in this game so I could bitch slap Wayne.

I would've called you back.

I wouldn't eat here I would never eat here anyway.

I... I host an open mike. I play a fuckin' bus driver in a movie.

I'll be around.

I'll get a Dewars on the rocks. What are you getting?

I'll have a scotch on the rocks, please.

I'll have the pancakes and the age of enlightenment, please.

I'll hit again.

I'll make some coffee.

I'm considering taking a part as Goofy.

I'm getting vibe like in a really weird way here.

I'm glad you came out tonight. It's good to see you.

I'm going... You gotta show up wearing that suit, or otherwise I'm not going.

I'm gonna ask you a simple question, and I want you to listen to me.

I'm gonna be up for a while and I'd rather speak to you in person...

I'm gonna bring an old friend from back home. He just moved out here.

I'm gonna check on my boy.

I'm gonna find me two waitresses here and I'm gonna pull me a Fredo.

I'm gonna keep time. One, two, three, four.

I'm gonna make Wayne Gretzky's head bleed for super fan number 99 over here.

I'm gonna pick you up. Listen to me.

I'm gonna tell you something, T. Are you listening?

I'm just saying not in this particular case.

I'm not even hungry. I couldn't touch it.

I'm not going to Vegas.

I'm not gonna be one of those assholes. Alright?

I'm so...

I'm sorry about interrupting you guys.

I'm sorry. I got lucky on the craps table.

I'm sorry. I shouldn't.

I'm sorry. Maybe I don't know.

I'm sure I... They weren't in there that long.

I'm sure she'll call.

I'm tellin' you, this is how you do it.

I'm telling you the future is beautiful.

I'm telling you, baby, you always double down on an 11.

I'm the asshole in the place. Right? I'm the asshole?

I'm thinking of moving back East.

I'm tired. We should just go.

I've been doing very well. Thank you. Thank you...

If and when I get a real gig, I'll give you a call. How's that?

If he's polite, have him come in. If he's polite, let him in. Is he clean?

If the guy wanted to, yeah.

If you don't look like you know what...

If you meet a girl in a bar and you talk to her...

In fact, you can only do stuff to make her not want to come back.

Instead of trying to fit it all into

Is 213 555 4679...

Is because I saw how well you were doing...

Is gonna front me?

Is if you take her back when she wants to come back.

Is this a fuckin' production for ya?

It could have been someone who looks like me, 'cause there's a

It could work. I'm serious.

It didn't occur to me.

It didn't.

It just makes me sick.

It surprises me that you've never mentioned

It took them four days to light that shot.

It was "Drugs are Bad." "Jenny Eats Something."

It was probably more.

It was six months ago, and she didn't leave me.

It was, like, that's it! I should be an actress.

It's 20 to.

It's a starring role. I practiced for like a week. Right?

It's about time.

It's all so hard.

It's at The Room. It's Sinatra's birthday.

It's been like six years.

It's been six months and I'm just starting to like get over it now.

It's gonna be a lay up.

It's gonna be okay.

It's in the back, alright? I'll put it on when we get there.

It's just I been... I been out of the game for so long, man.

It's just I... I'm not attracted to them.

It's just I'm really bad at this.

It's just so simple.

It's just that I get like this thing where I want

It's just...

It's kind of like a speakeasy kind of thing. It's kinda cool.

It's kind of like not talking to your pitcher in the middle of a no hitter.

It's like some nasty skank who isn't half the woman my girlfriend is...

It's like the hottest one percent from from all over the world...

It's like you almost miss that pain.

It's like you're in on some kind of secret, you know?

It's like, "Mom, hi. I didn't get that pilot.

It's like, now I have my LA gun story.

It's no good, man.

It's not even so much me as it's Roenick. He's good.

It's not going too well?

It's not like you live in Compton, Sue, with bullets whizzing by your head.

It's not you, it's me.

It's only been six months...

It's red. I have a... It's a red Cavalier.

It's sunny every day here. It's like manifest destiny.

It's totally fine. Trent cleared it up.

It's what... It's what I'm going through.

It's... it's hard to explain. You wouldn't understand.

It's... it's not you, it's me. I'm sorry.

Jesus Christ! I'm tellin' you, man.

Jesus Christ. Pause the game.

Jesus, that must've cost a fortune.

Just brother, right? Finally I get to go in and meet everyone, right?

Just filming it there? Got tears in his eyes.

Just fuckin' move it.

Just fuckin' smash. His teeth came out.

Just hold on. Hello?

Just like that.

Just orange juice.

Just shut the fuck up, alright?

Just shut up, okay? I can't.

Just stop for a second!

Just take this.

Just watch old T bone there and learn.

Keep the waters comin'.

Kind of a dick move, if you ask me.

Kinda.

Ladies, don't you always double down on an 11?

Lady has 11 . What would you like to do?

Let's get home.

Let's get the hell out of here if we wanna make this party.

Let's go get something to eat.

Let's go.

Let's see, I dropped probably 35 or

Life, after all...

Like fuckin' House of Pain was gonna do anything?

Like they were giving sitcoms out to stand ups at the airport here.

Like, if I met a handsome young man at a bar...

Listen to me, Mike. Your self esteem is low right now

Listen to you. I've got a final callback for a pilot

Listen, bring a single malted Glengarry for me...

Listen, I'm really not supposed to drink here.

Listen, why don't you come out tonight, Mikey?

Listen. I just listened to you. Now hear me out.

Listen. Just 'cause I had the balls to stand up to these fuckin' guys

Listen. Why don't you call a friend and have her meet the three of us...

Little Wayne's legs are shaking all over.

Look at all the beautiful babies here.

Look at it!

Look it, when you go up to talk to her, man...

Look, I know what that's like.

Look, man, I'm sorry we always talk about the same thing all the time.

Look, T, the girls don't go for me the way they go for you, okay?

Look, there's somebody holding on the other line. I have to take this call.

Look, Trent, you know, I got shit to do tomorrow.

Look, we're going to this party in the hills.

Look, we're gonna spend half the night driving around

Look, you gotta get that girl out of your head. I hope my

Look, you see how they dress when they go out, right?

Look, you take yourself outta the game.

Los Angeles.

Lot of people who look...

Ma'am! Where do the high school girls hang out around here?

Maybe a Glengoyne... any Glen.

Maybe he'd like to come in and join us for a cocktail, Michael.

Maybe I'll wait three weeks. How's that?

Maybe we should just take some time off from each other.

Message one.

Message three.

Message two.

Michael, I want to see him. Don't let him go! Don't let him go.

Michael, is he clean? I want to see him!

Michael, this is Grandma.

Mickey? Mickey's an icon.

Mike, come back here! Mike, come back here!

Mike, do you even think I know what the hell they're saying to me half the time?

Mike, I'm telling you, girls love that stuff.

Mike, If you don't look like you know...

Mike, listen. It's hard, I know. I been there myself.

Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike. Stop. Don't. Don't, don't.

Mike, stop, stop. Stop, all right? Just stop.

Mike?

Mike.

Mikey, check it out. His legs...

Mikey, don't even sweat her. Alright?

Mikey, get the door?

Mikey, I'm telling you, man. I was money.

Mikey, it's Rob. I'm downstairs.

Mikey, that's who. Mikey's the big winner.

More important, man, I'm sorry about what I said.

More than that, 'cause I'm in it. But like I'm broke. But like that.

Motherfucker!

Must've been a while ago, 'cause I'm...

My man spent on that Vegas movie?

My whole life people have told me I have this star quality.

Nah, man. I know you didn't. Otherwise you wouldn't be askin' me, right?

Nice to meet you.

Nice.

Nice.

Nicely done, sir. You're on a streak now.

Nikki? Mike.

No way.

No way. No, turn around. I'm goin' home.

No, baby, she smiled.

No, he's not. Listen, it's a whole other

No, I think I would remember this girl.

No, I think it was about two weeks ago.

No, I used to wait two days to call anybody,

No, I'm across the street. Yeah.

No, no, no.

No, no. You hang on, okay? I want... I want to talk to you.

No, she's not looking at you, dude.

No, that's okay. I wanted to talk to you.

No, when I lived in New York they made it sound...

No, you listen to me. I'm not going, okay?

No? You're sure? Monday nights, open mike?

No.

No.

No.

No.

No. I know. I know.

No. We're not going tonight. I'm not going to Vegas!

No. You know what, have you gotten laid...

None of this shit anymore.

Not call her, I don't know, whatever.

Not funny, okay?

Not happening, man.

Not lately, no.

Not so much from my reading, although it had a lot to do with it...

Not till you book it. You know, you might get cut out.

Not tonight? Listen to you! We're gonna have fun tonight.

Not tonight.

Not your type.

Nothin' but smiles for me. Whatever. Here it is.

Now look at you, man. Right? I mean, you got a part in a movie.

Now one of us is gonna get shot.

Now take this girl here. Right. She's a waitress in Las Vegas, okay?

Now the trick is we gotta look like we don't need

Now, the casting director who's reading with me kinda gets caught up in the vibe.

Now, those places are supposed to be it.

Now, we met a beautiful baby, and she likes you.

Now, we're not...

Of course it's going to end up on the friendship tip.

Of Tina Yothers, you know, from Family Ties.

Oh man. How'd your folks take it?

Oh, don't worry about it, man.

Oh, don't worry about it, Mike.

Oh, God! Like a Las Vegas waitress is gonna get

Oh, God.

Oh, he got away from us. I'm sorry, Michael. Was he nice?

Oh, I really shouldn't. But then again, it's a good idea. I'd love it.

Oh, is that right?

Oh, let's see, I'll have the Toucan.

Oh, Lisa's a Dorothy. That's great. That's great.

Oh, man, who would ever carjack your fuckin' K car?

Oh, Mike, please! You're the fun lovin', outgoing party guy...

Oh, Mike, you don't want all that fuckin' Pirate of the Caribbean horseshit.

Oh, Mike, you gotta stop worrying about this. We're goin' to Vegas, man.

Oh, Mike. Respect, my ass.

Oh, no, no, it's totally cool, man.

Oh, right, right, right. The song.

Oh, she didn't see that.

Oh, so you haven't told them yet.

Oh, thank you!

Oh, they're gonna notice me and you, 'cause they're watching.

Oh, who's your representation back East?

Oh, whoopee, you got a number tonight? You're gonna fuck it up.

Oh, yeah No, I mean, he would want to with you. Sure. I mean, if he...

Oh, you poor thing.

Oh, you're a comedian.

Oh, you're a comedian.

Okay, fine. Take my last 20. Here. Jesus fucking Christ.

Okay, I'm gonna try. I promise you I will shut up if you shut the hell up.

Okay, just tuck 'em under, just like this.

Okay, so what if I don't want to give up on her?

Okay, that's great advice. Thanks a lot. Okay? Bye.

Okay!

Okay? I'm sorry.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. And this guy she's seeing, what the hell does he do?

Okay. I'll hit there. Okay.

Okay. This is the guy behind the guy behind the guy.

Okay. Yeah, it's on the fourth floor. The elevator's broken, okay?

One of the best streaks I've ever had. I wanna get even.

One time I started to cry right in front of Pierre.

One, two, three

Or how their dad can't show 'em affection.

Or we'll be at the Derby for Big Bad Voodoo Daddy.

Or you didn't call her. Why didn't you call her? You said you didn't call her.

Otherwise we'll be at the Dresden Room, so come on out and meet up with us.

Our little baby's all "growns" up.

Our little boy's all "growns" up tonight!

Party, buddy! Yeah! Dig that!

Party, buddy! Yeah! Dig that!

Party, buddy! Yeah! Dig that!

Pause the game!

People get carjacked.

Perfect.

Perhaps you'd be more comfortable at one of our lower stakes tables.

Personality plus, all the time. Everytime I come in here.

Pierre? That's his name, Pierre? What, is he French?

Please, stop. I'm trying to make a phone call.

Probably longer, 'cause things have been going very well lately.

Raoul, what's up, man? How's it goin'?

Remember the first week after she told you?

Renaissance. It went over her head.

Right, although probably more likely the opposite.

Right, right, right. Well, you know, I think you look great, man.

Right.

Right.

Right.

Roll up, bitch! Roll up! Roll. That's right.

Score Chicago!

Scotch on the rocks.

See if she wants to meet you there.

See what I mean? It's the same old shit all the time.

See what I'm sayin', man?

See you soon, gorgeous.

See, baby, it's not that hard.

See, man, you can't roll with that. She's business class.

See, Mike, the only difference between giving up and not giving up...

See, that's what I'm trying to tell you, baby.

Selling scrap metal.

Seventeen.

She asked me what I was thinking about.

She didn't like me, okay? I made a fool of myself.

She don't know me. She doesn't know my address. You know my address?

She got a lot of confidence, man. She's doing like

She hasn't looked at you... Wait, she just looked.

She knows.

She likes you.

She starts crying.

She was smiling at how money I was, what I did with her.

She was smiling at what an asshole you are.

She won't call because you left.

She's coming over, dude. Play it cool. She's coming over.

She's got her own life to deal with, man, and that's in New York.

She's just like this little bunny who's just kinda cowering in the corner.

She's like the wild loony. But I threw, like, the great vibe

She's playing a little game, like a fun thing with me.

She's smiling at me. She's playing fun little baby games.

She's the only one I danced with till tonight. That Lorraine is good.

Shut the fuck up, Sue!

Shut the fuck up!

Single malt. Glenlivet, Glenfiddich perhaps.

Sitting there, drinking orange juice, feeling sorry for yourself.

Six days.

Six years.

So he says to me I swear to God he says this to me with a straight face.

So I check the time and the place. I'm where I'm supposed to be.

So I felt confident, 'cause I gave a good read.

So I finished reading with her.

So I haven't been looking for a job in a while.

So I heard you might be moving back to New York.

So I put down my head, and the whole room sits in silence...

So I think that's why he's such a mean cat.

So I think three days is kinda money. What do you think?

So I'm reading with the casting director and, girls, I literally start crying.

So I'm sitting in the waiting room...

So it's a 800 It's a 800 number.

So it's like a retroactive decision then?

So just, I'm gonna call you back when you get back into town.

So now she's crying. I'm crying.

So the only difference is if I

So the party started at 8:00.

So the producer starts to talk to me.

So two days.

So what do you guys do?

So you called her up, right?

So, okay? Thanks a lot. Bye bye.

Some don't like me. I don't like certain people.

Some modeling agency. I don't know. Whatever.

Somehow they know not to come back until you really forget.

Sorry about what happened at the Dresden, man.

Sorry, man.

Start with... I don't know, 300?

Sue, why is Gretzky on his ass again?

Sue!

Sue. Yeah. His dad was a big Johnny Cash fan from what I understand.

Sure. Maybe it's just that he doesn't feel like dancing.

Swear to God, five minutes.

Swing it, kid!

T

Take this ticket in with you when you go in.

Tarantino completely bites everything from Scorsese.

Tearing their face. They're crying their eyes out.

Tell her I was cleaning out my wallet and

Tell me about it.

Tell you I'm not gonna talk about her anymore.

Thank you.

Thanks, man.

Thanks.

Thanks. I appreciate that.

Thanks. Thanks, man.

That if you didn't have to take us home.

That means my life is god awful.

That should help explain why I'm acting so weird.

That the SteadiCam shot in Goodfellas was the money.

That was so fuckin' money. That was like the Jedi mind shit.

That was Sue. I got two parties tonight. One's for a modeling agency.

That was your last message.

That went plenty nice, baby. You're up 20 bucks.

That you know how to find it.

That's all right, man. I still haven't told my folks

That's all right. I keep it in the zone.

That's great, man.

That's great.

That's great. Isn't that funny?

That's my hog right

That's nice.

That's nice.

That's not gonna be good enough. I wanna make plans to see you again.

That's nothing, man. You know how much money

That's pretty They know you around here, huh?

That's really been sort of my thing, you know. It got me into Juilliard.

That's right.

That's so bad. I'm sorry.

That's what I keep tryin' to tell him.

That's what my friends said. But...

The basement of the the restaurant, the Copa in New York.

The beautiful babies don't work midnights to 6:00 on Wednesday.

The best thing you can do is just get back out there.

The bunny is scared of you.

The girls are young, they drink.

The guy working the camera, you know,

The guy you're not sure whether or not you like yet.

The hills looking for this one party...

The honey baby's bringing us a cocktail.

The Kings suck in this game. You should play another team.

The Michelin commercial?

The money's pretty good.

The one right in the beginning where they're walking in slow motion, man.

The only reason I mentioned her at all was to

The point is, Mike, it all depends on how you look at it. All right?

The role I'm reading for is "brother." I'm reading for the part of "brother."

The shit, then they give us shit for free.

The whole Judy Garland thing kinda turned me on.

The whole room is rip roaring clapping it up for me, for big T, right?

The wonderful lady. Right?

The worst was when I went in for this After School Special, right?

Then he says to me... He says, "Trent, I gotta be honest with you.

Then I'm trying to, like, maintain a conversation with them.

Then it hit me on the way over here, you know, like a ton of bricks.

Then this 50 cent piece has your name written all over it, okay?

Then why won't she call?

Then you wake up one day and it doesn't hurt at all.

There are plenty of fish in the sea.

There it is, Mikey! Check it out. His head's bleeding.

There she is!

There you go.

There you two are.

There's gonna be beautiful babies there.

There's just something about being Goofy, all right?

There's not much of a call for Shakespeare in this town.

There's nothing wrong with letting the girls know that you're money...

There's, you know, no clocks in this town anywhere.

These claws and these fangs, man!

They all asked me why I got Donald Duck on my card.

They don't go for the sensitive shit. You know what I mean?

They fuckin' love T, man. That boy can talk.

They have to hide all the lights.

They know what you want to do. What do you think?

They know what you want, baby. Believe me.

They turned you down?

They want you to notice 'em.

They'll probably fall all over themselves for

They're auditioning for the same role as you?

They're gonna give Daddy a room, some breakfast, maybe Bennett singing.

They're gonna give Daddy the Rain Man suite. You dig that?

They're idiots. At least it's not Goofy.

They're watching you when you drive up.

This fucking guy. "A Eleven. Eleven years old."

This girl's looking at me like she knows me a little bit.

This is Charles. We went to network on a pilot.

This is definitely a step back for me.

This is it.

This is kinda weird, but it's like...

This is Mike.

This is Trent. We call him Double Down.

This is what happened. She's a nice girl.

This just isn't working out.

Those guys are right about you. You're money.

Through the kitchen, Mike.

To be a gentleman and I wanna show respect.

To find and have no sign.

To grab a drink before we meet the guys for a bite at 11:00.

To see if there's somebody else who's more important she should be talking to.

Tomorrow.

Trent.

Twelve. Sixteen.

Twenty one.

Twenty, all right? But I was down at least fifty.

Two Glengarrys down, easy on the water.

Two's enough not to look anxious.

Unbelievable, dude.

Vegas, baby. Vegas.

Vegas, baby. Vegas.

Vegas.

Wait. You gotta be nuts to shoot in a casino.

Was that money or what?

Watch the steps. They're greasy.

Watch where you're going, asshole.

We all miss you back here in New York.

We got a line. T, We got a line.

We got knocked out pretty fast.

We gotta get out of here.

We gotta get you out of that stuffy apartment.

We kept our rep, bro.

We might also check out Swing Night at the El Rey.

We saw 'em that night at Roscoe's.

We should do it again some time.

We should go someplace else. How's my place?

We should just hang out...

We were a rebound and we lasted for six years.

We'll play some more. He likes to get scored on.

We're both kinda crying, but not like, not the kind of crying that's like...

We're going bye bye now. Yes, we're going bye bye.

We're gonna be up five "hundy" by midnight!

We're gonna go home, gonna play with Daddy.

We're gonna meet our honeys soon. Alright?

We're gonna play hockey at Sue's house until 10:30...

Well listen to me now. Everybody in the room is sitting there

Well, exactly, it's like, you know, you have...

Well, I guess I should be getting home. It's really getting late.

Well, I guess we don't have to worry about him anymore.

Well, I'm a comedian.

Well, I'm going out of town for a week and the cab's on its way.

Well, in case somebody steps to you, Snoop Dogg?

Well, lovely makeup job you have there.

Well, Michael, I'll bite.

Well, neither is acting, not if you're serious about it.

Well, that's what I heard.

Well, there are... You know, it's just different circuits.

Well, we all have stories.

Well, we're not in Kansas anymore.

Well, who's your booking agent?

Well, yeah, but how long was the relationship she was rebounding from?

Well, yeah. It wasn't that simple, but...

What about now? Is she looking now?

What about you, Mikey? At least I fuckin' have balls, man.

What advantages, you mean?

What an asshole.

What are they doing here?

What are you doing?

What do you drive?

What do you mean, like you didn't want to jinx it?

What do you mean?

What do you say, man?

What do you think, Mike?

What do you want me to do? Lie?

What else?

What kind of a car do you drive?

What kind of things?

What the fuck are you Why did you un pause it?

What the fuck are you carrying a gun for?

What the fuck did you want me to do, man?

What the fuck?

What the hell do you want to get out of here for?

What they respect is honesty.

What was so cold about it?

What, are you nuts?

What? You can do whatever you want, you know.

What'd she say when you called her back?

What'd you say, bitch?

What'd you think of that Dorothy girl?

What's that guy's name again? Sue?

What's up. Baby?

What's wrong with you? I saw you talkin' to a beautiful brunette baby.

What's wrong?

Whatever, man! You're like a fuckin' little whiny bitch, man.

Whatever, man. It's different out here. It's not like New York, Mikey.

Whatever, Mike. It's work. You understand?

Whatever. Daddy's gonna get her to bring a friend.

Whatever. It's After School Special bullshit.

When I'm not here, will you practice this?

Where is this place?

Where'd you learn to do all those stuff, man?

Who's the big winner here tonight at the casino? Huh?

Why are we going to a bar at 10:00?

Why didn't you call her? Mike?

Why didn't you call?

Why do you have to make a major production every time we go out and embarrass me?

Why do you think they put the instant replay in the fucking game?

Why don't you shut the fuck up for a little bit?

Why not, Mike?

Why not?

Why ruin a perfect night?

Why, baby? What'd I do wrong?

Why, so you can sit around your stuffy apartment beating yourself up over it?

Why'd they get rid of the fighting? It's the best part of the old version.

Will you cut that shit out?

Will you quit asking me if she's looking at you?

Will you shut up for a minute? We gotta get you the fuck out of Dodge, man.

Will you stop for a second?

Will you stop makin' fun, all right?

With the cigar?

With these claws, you're thinkin', "How am I supposed to kill this bunny?"

Would that T, would that be the money?

Would you dance with me?

Would you like to have some breakfast this morning, ma'am?

Wow, that's two more than me.

Wow. I guess you're home.

Wow. I want you to remember this face here.

Yeah, "A Boy Named Sue." Right?

Yeah, against the computer with the offsides off.

Yeah, and an actor. Kind of.

Yeah, but entertainment law isn't something that you just jump into.

Yeah, but you know what, Mike? You can make their heads bleed on this one.

Yeah, for the same reason that you miss her.

Yeah, he's cool. You'll like him. He's a rounder, Rob.

Yeah, I gotta get up early tomorrow.

Yeah, I really didn't like her that much, to be honest.

Yeah, I'm listening.

Yeah, it sucks.

Yeah, it's a dream, you know. It's a lot of hard work and travel and hotels.

Yeah, it's the logo from You Bet Your Life.

Yeah, motherfucker.

Yeah, right.

Yeah, sure. It's gettin' kinda late, so you probably

Yeah, they went with somebody who had some more theme park experience.

Yeah, this is... this is truly old school.

Yeah, well, my reputation seems to have preceded me here.

Yeah, well. Two's enough not to look anxious.

Yeah, why not? This place is dead anyway.

Yeah, yeah, the quiche. That's a really original joke.

Yeah, you do.

Yeah, you know what, Mike?

Yeah, you know, the one with the baby in the tire.

Yeah, you know, whatever. I needed a good kick in the ass.

Yeah, you're not hurtin' it. You're just kinda gently battin' the bunny around.

Yeah! Dig that!

Yeah? Well, I thought real men didn't like quiche.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. Hang on a second. Let me get rid of this.

Yeah. I mean, you said there are advantages to being single.

Yeah. I think, you know what, man? We're gonna go to Vegas. And...

Yeah. I'll have a coffee. Two... two coffees.

Yeah. Listen, I don't think that's going to be happening just yet.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yesterday?

Yo! Bartender!

You always double...

You are definitely good. Did you even see how she was vibing you tonight?

You asked a girl for her number and you tore it up.

You asshole! What... Didn't you see Boyz N the Hood?

You been tearing yourself up about this girl for six months.

You better replace the pin, Chi Chi. The natives look restless.

You bitch! What a fuckin' bitch!

You bitch! You bitch!

You bring something nice to wear.

You called me? Well, who did you talk to? I was home Monday.

You came in and asked me for an application.

You can't sit at home thinking about it.

You couldn't even leave your place.

You didn't go to college. You don't know how it is.

You didn't have to get into it, baby.

You don't call.

You don't have to wait.

You don't have to worry if anybody's watching you.

You don't just break it off cleanly after six years.

You don't look at the things that you have.

You don't think he would want to?

You eat anything today?

You ever been to the Ha Ha Hole on Pico?

You figure they'd figure it out by now, right?

You got a fucking problem with me, bitch?

You got an 11. You always double down on an 11.

You got an agent. You got in the unions.

You gotta get off this respect kick.

You gotta let go of the past, and Mikey, when you do

You grow, go out, anything.

You guys are assholes. Eat, eat, you fuckin' jackals.

You guys are terrible.

You have no messages.

You have to lay it on the table if you want me to change it.

You have to put things in perspective.

You haven't been drinking, have you?

You know how it is, man. It's like...

You know how you have those little crushes? I had this crush on this guy Lee.

You know I'm 24 years old. Why did you call me in?

You know that Christy's friend is gonna be money.

You know what Oh, Jesus Christ. That's all I need.

You know what I mean? And the bunny's scared Mike.

You know what you are? You're like a big bear with claws and with fangs, man.

You know what you probably coulda hit

You know what, big boy? You're grown up! You're grown up!

You know what, man, you were fuckin' off your ass tonight.

You know what? Ha, ha, ha, Mike. Laugh all you want.

You know what? I have it under control. Okay?

You know what? It won't last.

You know what? You gotta admit that did look money.

You know who the fucking bitch is?

You know, and half of them are just nasty skanks who wouldn't be nothing...

You know, I mean not counting what happened on the first table.

You know, I really could could've called you back.

You know, I was Hamlet two months ago Off Broadway, and I was good.

You know, man, I didn't understand it either.

You know, no harm done.

You know, not one club owner got that.

You know, or the rock and roll grunge tip.

You know, part of the reason that I moved out here

You know, right now I have a booking agent.

You know, Rob, you're the only one I can talk to about her.

You know, that's your problem, is that you

You know, there's so many beautiful women.

You know, us.

You know, when you pretend it's just like a waste of their time.

You know, you got these claws and you're staring at these

You know, you just sat around your stuffy apartment...

You know. All that shit.

You little Oh, you Hold on.

You live in a good neighborhood, man. In New York trouble finds you.

You live in this fucking fantasy world.

You look like shit.

You look like you been workin' out though.

You miss the pain?

You notice I didn't mention her once today.

You only look at the stuff you don't have.

You ready to order?

You really think they don't know?

You run. You run, baby.

You said I don't call if I wanted to give up on her.

You said it was fuckin' bullshit. Check it out.

You should be an actress!"

You should hear the way I tell it to the guys back home. It's an Uzi.

You should practice this when I'm not here.

You shouldn't be sorry. You're a winner. I'm the fuckin' loser.

You start talkin' to 'em about puppy dogs and ice cream...

You start talking to 'em about, you know, puppy dogs and ice cream.

You still haven't told me if you got that part on the television

You tell a chick you been someplace, it's like braggin'

You tested over a month ago. I'm sure they figured it out.

You think they'll notice me and you?

You think we can get there by midnight?

You understand?

You wake up every day, it hurts a little bit less...

You want to be fresh on the scene, right?

You want to play fun little games? Come on, you nasty little, cute little baby.

You'll see.

You're a bad man. You're a bad man.

You're a better man than I am, Charlie Brown.

You're a good friend.

You're always whining about some bitch that left you a year ago!

You're better off without this girl. You gotta trust me on this, Mike.

You're doing really well out here, Mike.

You're doing what you love to do. What the hell is she doing now?

You're fuckin' makin' me sick! You want to kiss me!

You're gonna get over it.

You're gonna screw up our plan.

You're gonna take 'em that way eventually, right?

You're laughing at me? That's funny to you, huh?

You're like a big bear, man.

You're looking at your claws and you're looking at your fangs.

You're money. And you know what else? You're a big winner tonight.

You're my problem, you bitch motherfucker!

You're not a real man?

You're not allowed to hand me money, sir.

You're not sure where he's coming from, okay? You're a bad man.

You're so fucking money.

You're so... you're so money, and you don't even know it.

You're the big winner in more ways than one.

You're the fucking bitch!

You're the fucking bitch!

You're thinking to yourself, "I don't know what to do, man.

Your advice really helps. I don't know

213 555 4679. That's it. Just wanna leave my number.

'Cause I... So what do you do, Trent?

All right, buddy? Stop talking. Shut up.

All right, bye bye. Good bye. I love

All right, man. Who's that?

All right? Sure. Hey.

All right? Yeah, sure.

All right. How you doin', man?

All right. Okay, bitch.

All right. Count 'em up. How many strokes?

Already? Yeah.

And I believe him. What?

And it's shivering. You got the fucking claws!

And you know what he said? What? What?

And you said "double down." Double down.

Are you calling her? No. Will you stop? I'm try Please.

Are you sure? Yeah, sure. The phone's in the back.

Are you sure? Yeah. Oh, I understand.

at the Bamboo Lounge at 6:01? You got it.

Baby, we're not messing with you. We're not.

Beats me. Hey, I came with you.

Big fuckin' teeth, man. Yeah, big fuckin' teeth on ya.

Budweiser. A Dewars on the rocks and a Bud.

Business class? Big butt. You know, can't fly coach?

but in kindergarten, you know It's all right.

But Moms keeps asking me. Boy, does it hurt when they ask.

But you gotta be cool. I'm cool, baby, I'm cool.

Chelios steals to Roenick. You bitch!

Come on, bitch! You want some?

Come on, man, I want to fuckin' play. I want him to learn it.

Come on, man! Let's move it up! Hey, man.

Come on, Superman. You watchin', New Kids On The Block?

Definitely old school. This place is fuckin' dead.

Definitely. It's not like that.

Did she call yet? I'm sure she Message four.

Did she or did she not smile? It doesn't matter.

Do you have anything smaller? Yes, as a matter of fact, I do.

Does that make me some kind of a fag? No, baby, you're money.

Double down. What?

Dude, it's fucking on, dude! Okay, okay. It's on, dude.

Dude, it's so fuckin' on, dude. I know. It's on.

Eight or a nine. I'll give you an eight.

Eight, nine. What'd you get?

Everybody'll get there around 10:00. So, what, 11:00?

Excuse me. Excuse me, darling. I'm sorry.

Fifteen. I don't know what to do here.

Fine, I guess. How are you? Good.

Fuck him up. Smack that fuckin' bitch.

Get off! Look at you right now.

Get there. Play it out.

Give it up for Mike. Look, I

God, you're unbelievable. So you can see if it's bullshit.

He drives a carriage. What?

He should wait two days. If he's smart about it

He was fuckin' pissing me off! Just shut the fuck up.

He's fuckin' right. Shut up! Hey, Mike, come here.

Hello? Hi, Michael.

Hello? Hi, Mike?

Hello? What's up, Trent?

Here it comes. 'Cause I'm tall.

Hey guys, let's just take the front. We don't gotta wait in line.

Hey, guys! Mikey's here! What's up, Mikey?

Hey, Mikey! Mikey, is he cute? Is he brown?

Hey, Scotty. Yeah?

Hey, sweetie. Hola. ¿Cómo estás??

Hey. ¿Qué Paso?

Hi, Mike. How are you? You know what's funny?

Hi. Hi.

Honestly! Mike, I'm telling you, you're money.

How are you guys doing? It's on, Mike. It's on.

How much do you want? Just give me some money.

How you been? Good to see you. Hey, good to see you.

How you doin' tonight? Hey, Gary.

How're you doin', guys? Hey, boys.

How're you guys doing? Not well.

I decided to get back out there. Good. Glad to hear it.

I didn't mention her once today. Tend the pin.

I didn't want to say anything. Oh, yeah? Why?

I don't think I'm gonna take it. Look, it's a gig.

I don't think she liked me anyway. Oh Mike, I'm tellin' you, man.

I got fuckin' Wayne. Pause it!

I grew up in LA. Anaheim.

I had a great time tonight. Me too.

I host an open mike there. No.

I know just the place. What the hell are you wearin'?

I know, I know. She doesn't deserve you.

I made a promise to myself. Go. Go for it.

I really do! Shut up, okay? I know she likes me.

I think about you every day. Really?

I think I like this town. No, no, gotta go to New Orleans.

I thought I was gonna die. Oh, God.

I thought you met someone else. It doesn't matter.

I want to leave. You're a big winner.

I'm a producer. Cool!

I'm gonna get you that scotch. You know, forget about it.

I'm Lorraine. Like the quiche.

I'm Mike. Hi, Mike.

I'm not going to Vegas. Mike, we 're going.

I'm not ruining tonight, am I? No, it's okay.

I'm sorry, man. I didn't know. Don't sweat it, Mike.

I'm sorry. It's okay.

I'm sorry. I never got your name. I'm Mike.

I'm the one who should be sorry. Baby, don't talk that way.

Is he polite? Is he a brown man?

Is that okay? Yeah.

Is that right? Well, I don't know if it's true.

It doesn't matter. That was pretty cold, dude.

It makes me want to fuckin' puke. Jesus Christ!

It's just you been there, man. Don't sweat it.

It's on. It is so on.

It's on. To you. Jesus Christ. I'm sorry.

It's so sweet. So sweet. That is so sweet.

It's true. He's derivative.

Just brother, man. Just brother. No.

Let me make it up to you. Hang on, Nick.

Look at it! I don't want to!

Lorraine! Are you on the other line?

Make somebody's head bleed. No, we're in play offs.

Marty invited me here. Oh, yeah? Cool, cool.

Michelle went for you, right? That's different.

Michelle? Hi. How's it going? It's been a while.

Midnight. Midnight.

Mike, you gotta double down. I can't double down.

Mike, you just looked right at her. Oh. Come on, she didn't notice.

Mike? Nikki! Great!

Mikey wins. What a fuckin' asshole.

Mikey! What's up, man? You wanna play again, motherfucker?

Money! Bitch!

My pleasure. How you doin', man?

Nice guy, though. That guy's cool. Hey, big Mike.

Nice to see you. I'll give you a call. All right. Take care.

Nice touch. I can't believe you got that.

Nikki. Nikki. Thank you, Nikki.

No matter what. Like splitting aces. Whatever.

No, it's all right. It's just that, you know

No, no, no, no, wait. Yeah, yeah.

No, not the camera guy. I swear to God, the camera guy.

No. I swear to God.

No. Why not?

No. Yeah.

Oh, God. I'm outta here, honey.

Oh, it's on. It's definitely on.

Oh, Lisa works at the MGM Grand. I'm a Dorothy.

Oh, now she's your ex. She was always my ex.

Oh, so you want some? You want some? You ain't shit!

Oh, so you want something. Hey, fucker. Hey.

Oh, yeah, I tested for one. A month ago.

Oh, yeah. Nice.

Okay, you're gonna be my wing man? I'll be your winger.

Okay? Okay.

On the table. Excuse me?

Our little baby's all "growns" up. Why do you have to

Over easy. I'll be back with the coffee.

Really? You sure? It's all right. All right.

Right. "Jenny Eats Something."

Right. Because if you can't drink here...

Right. Like give me a minute.

Right. So I don't call either way.

Right. Well, that sucks.

Roll up, bitch! Roll! Come on, let's see it!

See that? He's being funny. Whatever.

See, I have a face that's similar... You better pay the man.

Set the game up. Great times.

She looking at me now? No.

She thought you were money. I don't think so.

She's cute, man. Jesus Christ.

Shit. Mommy's big boy.

Shivering. Yeah, man, just kinda...

Six years? Oh, poor thing. I know.

Slap that bitch. Roll up, bitch.

So give me the fuckin' part. Give me the fuckin' part. Exactly. Right?

So how long do I wait to call? A day.

So what's the difference? There is no difference right now.

So who threw this party anyway? Damned if I know.

So you're not just fuckin' with me? No, I'm not fucking with you!

So, you hung up on which one? Michelle.

Someone got out of school early today. I think, they like our vibe.

Stop with that fucking Reservoir Dogs. Which one?

Tell me it gets better. Oh, it does, yeah. It does.

Thank you so much! Why not? By all means.

Thanks for clarifying that. You know, I'm down too, Mike. Alright?

Thanks, man. Get off me!

That guy? Oh, he's a bad guy.

That shit wasn't funny anyway. Piece of shit.

That was pretty. Such fuckin' bullshit!

That was so demeaning. She smiled, baby.

That'll be great. Okay, great. Let's go.

That's the dope. Dude, dude. Reservoir Dogs.

The twirly whirly Jackknife, shut up.

Then ask her where you met her. Yeah.

Then you can't drink. Why not?

There's the rub. There's the rub.

They don't have fighting anymore? Doesn't that suck?

They don't know any better. Do you know how stupid that sounds?

They'll fix you up. You'll fix me up.

They're a finesse team, bro. They're a fuckin' bitch team. Score.

This is Lisa. Hi.

This is the skank shift. Look at all the beautiful honeys here.

To ladies? To ladies.

Tomorrow, then a day. Yeah.

Trent. Stop right there.

Twenty one. Oh, my gosh! Twenty one!

Uh huh. Yeah.

Unbelievable. Okay, I gotta try once.

Vegas, baby Vegas! What do you mean, Vegas?

Vegas. Las Vegas. I'm not going to no Vegas.

Watch out, motherfucker. No, you do not fuckin' hit my elbow.

We almost gave up on you. I'm sorry we're late.

We got digits, baby. Yeah, what a surprise.

We're goin' to Vegas tonight. What are you talkin' about, Vegas?

We're going to Vegas, Mike. Vegas! Vegas!

We're gonna make this work. You're damn right you're gonna try.

Well, at least it's Disney, right? Yeah.

Well, obviously not always. Always, baby.

Well, that's dumb. What's so dumb about it?

Well, unless she comes back first. See, that's the thing.

What a surprise. How novel.

What did you get? I got an eight.

What does he do? He's trying to be an actor.

What else is going on? Could hit the Dresden.

What time is the party tonight? It starts at 8:00.

What was the thing? I don't know what it was.

What, rejected? "Shaqued."

What? She smiled. That's not cool, man.

What's goin' on? Hey, Tony, man, how'd the audition go?

When are we going to Vegas? We 're going tonight.

When we played football that day Oh, Jesus Christ.

When you Dude, dude, wait a second.

Who, Rob? Yeah, you know him.

Why does it have to be Goofy? What do you want? You're tall.

Why not? It's a rebound.

Why? How is that different? We were younger. It was college.

Why? You like the duck with the cigar? Yeah.

Will you shut up? You were great tonight!

Wow. That's your great bit.

Wow. What's going

Wow. Yup.

Yeah, come on! You're the fuckin' bitch, baby!

Yeah, give me some money. Why do I have to give you money?

Yeah, I swear to God. Swear to God. Wow.

Yeah, she did. I better go in early now.

Yeah, that's great. Yeah?

Yeah, well, they're all skanks. What are you talkin' about?

Yeah! Vegas! Vegas! Vegas, baby. Vegas!

Yeah! Well, totally. Uh huh.

Yeah? Better play defense.

Yeah? Yeah.

Yeah? Well, it suits you. Get the hell outta here.

Yeah? What'd you lose? I don't know what I dropped.

Yeah? Which one? Groucho.

Yeah? Which one? The red piece of shit over there.

Yeah. Can I have one of these cards?

Yeah. Wow!

Yeah. Oh, hang on a second I could call back.

Yo, Double Down, what time we leaving? Five minutes, baby.

Yo, Mikey, what's up? Charles! How you doin', man?

You can check 'em tomorrow. I need to... I need to use the phone.

You didn't call her back? No.

You don't recognize her? Mike, I don't know.

You fuckin' asshole. What a fuckin' dick.

You got a Pluto callback? Yeah, kick me when I'm down.

You have to lay it on the table. I don't want to bet it all.

You hung up with her? I wanted to take the other call.

You hung up with your girlfriend. Ex.

You know what? Look at you. Look at you.

You know what? Shut up. Come on.

You know, man. You know. You get that pilot?

You never even mentioned me? Very pretty girl.

You ready, hip hop? Uh huh.

You think she's coming back here? Baby, I know she's coming back here.

You too? Oh, yeah. Yeah.

You wanna kiss me. Look at you. Get the fuck off.

You wanna talk about it? What's the point?

You were in Acapulco Beach? We watch that all the time.

You're fuckin' hurting feelings here. Hey, it's on. It's on.

You're money. Come here a second. Listen to me.

Yup. What time do you get off, Christy?

'Cause I've been... you know, I have a booking agent now that I've got.

'Cause it's nice and you know, no expectations.

'Cause you never shut up about it! You're like a little whiny bitch.

'Cause you're "growns" up and you're "growns" up and you're "growns" up.

"Deidre, you are so emotional. You are so dramatic.

"You shouldn't leave without getting something for free."

6:00. 6:00, great.

818? 310.