Spies Like Us (1985) Edit

A Drogan's decoder wheel?

About an hour?

Acknowledge compliance on Satscram now.

Actually, I could operate without my hands.

Actually, if this is the lower Kohistan district...

Ah! Oh!

Ah! Oh!

Ah. Forget it, get on with it.

Ah. Oh. Mind if I play through?

All right, everybody, please stand back!

All right, Sky troopers! Let's go! Let's go!

All right. All right. I'm an American agent.

All right. Let us begin the operation.

All right. Let's go to response level yellow.

All this cloak and dagger stuff. The military love it.

And at this particular time, you do not need to know.

And Dr. Imhaus of the Zurich relief fund.

And it's not going to be for nothing!

And let that be a lesson to you!

And now, I will incise.

And now, the first incision.

And now, the first incision.

And of course, the slightest misperceived phrase or gesture...

And they told you this over a public phone?

And to think my high school guidance counselor said I'd never amount to anything.

And we should never forget the words of President John F. Kennedy, who said:

And with that, I give you Dr. Julius Greenbaum.

And, uh...

And...?

Anyway, we were just talking and we'd like to go home now.

Apparently the aliens from the silver disk dissected the ox...

Approach SS 50...

Are there any Paraguayans here? No?

Are you my mother?

Are you suggesting we assign this job to inferior personnel?

Aren't you Drs. Trowbridge and Greenberg?

As far as I know, that's how it'll always be. Is that clear?

As far as it takes us.

As the disarmament talks continue through closed sessions...

Ask not what your country can do for you...

Austin. Your turn to drive.

B, act surprised.

Besides, I've arranged for an intimate lunch with our supervisor.

Bigger than a bread box?

Both the U.S. and Soviet response chain on full recall.

Both the U.S. and Soviet response chain on full recall.

Bounce mode engaged.

Bounce pulse failed to connect with target, sir.

Boy, you don't know how glad we are to see you guys.

Boy!

Boyer, start sending the launch sequence in reverse order.

Boys, it would be a shame to have to kill you now.

Bring all birds into final bounce mode.

Broke my arm.

But can't you tell? He's already been given the required injection of Pentothal.

But under the circumstances...

But with four other GLG 20s...

But, alas, I recently suffered severe nerve damage in my left hand.

By the way, good luck on the test tomorrow.

By your actions, sir, you are risking the future of the human race!

C, deny everything...

Can I borrow your pen?

Can I borrow your tent?

Censure? Departmental prosecution? What?

Christ, will you look at this place?

Colonel Rhombus, Special Projects Training. We've been expecting you.

Colonel, we were just talking...

Come in.

Come on, come on. You can't do this! What are you doing? Aaah!

Come on, let's get out of here.

Come on! Come on!

Come on.

Come on. The others are anxious to meet you.

Common sense.

Comrade!

Congratulations, men.

Damn!

Damn. Recall.

Dead.

Depress red key switch.

Did you see me cut into his chest? Did I cut his chest?

Didn't exactly say where on the road, did they?

Didn't work? Where did the pulse go?

Do you think those men are following us?

Do you wanna do the operation? Fine. You come on up here, and you do it.

Doctor.

Doctor. Doctor. Ha. Glad I'm not sick.

Doctors Stinson, Marston, and Gill of Northampton Trauma Institute.

Doctors?

Doctors.

Don't do that, Alice.

Don't I get a phone call?

Don't know, sir, but it definitely didn't connect.

Don't touch me.

Don't you think I'm capable of determining my own time to go to the bathroom?

Don't you worry. I'll be with you.

Dr. Boyer, Bacteriology.

Dr. Greenbaum could be my hands.

Dr. Hadley was going to remove it, but now that you're here...

Dr. Hadley!

Dr. La Fong, Communicable Diseases.

Dr. Trowbridge Homer, when you walked into this tent...

Duck!

Easy.

ED: Mr. Fitz Hume. Hi, Ed.

Emmett Fitz Hume.

Enter...

Error. Stand down.

Every minute you don't tell us why you're here...

Everybody at home is most anxious to know how things are going in there.

Everybody looks fine here. What do you say?

Everything's fine.

Everything's under control, Mr. Fitz Hume.

Except that here in Intelligence Operative Training...

Excuse me, but what was all this...?

Excuse me.

Excuse us.

Figure 20, 22 until the first impact of our retaliatory strike.

Figure two for our response, say 20 until total commitment.

Find control box at front of transporter.

Fitz Hume, hold these together.

FITZ HUME: Uhn. Heart attack!

FITZ HUME: What other choice do we have?

FITZ HUME: What's she saying?

Fitz Hume!

Fitz Hume! Boyer!

Fitz Hume! Boyer! Get up! Get up!

Fitz, you have to take the test.

For after you've reached your final objective.

For erector panel, push red button.

For once, I am in complete agreement. We should all get up and leave immediately.

Foreign Service Boards, tomorrow? I can't take that test tomorrow.

Forget it, that's behind us. Our first priority is to cover those bodies...

Genius is a pretty strong word, but if you insist on using it...

Gentlemen, begin radical vertical impact simulation...

Gentlemen, I think you both should realize the gravity of this moment.

Get in the closet.

Get us the hell out of here!

GILL: Doctor. Doctor.

GILL: Doctor. Doctor.

Give me a break.

GLG 20s acknowledge programming and compliance.

GLG 20s don't grow exactly on trees. I'd hate to waste two as targets.

Go ahead and mention it. There's nothing I wouldn't do.

Go ahead, will you? I'm getting hungry.

Go? What does he mean, go?

Goddamn it!

Goddamn it. He gives himself up.

Good Golly Miss Molly?

Good morning. Is there an airport near here?

Good move. Good move. Headquarters.

Grab a rock! Grab a hammer! We can divert it!

Great Balls of Fire?

Greenbaumberg. We're doctors.

Ground deflectors opened and locked.

Guidance? Source Programmable guidance!

Ha. One night studying for a grade 19 FSB exam?

Hadley, London College of Medicine.

HADLEY: Why don't you gentlemen relax.

Hah!

Hair... Hairbrush... Headrest.

Have we received the last shipment of penicillin yet?

He is now forever entombed in a snowy grave.

He started there in '74 as a mail boy.

He's a repair supervisor in DIA's code breaking arm at the Pentagon.

He's already been given the required injections.

He's an information officer at State.

He's good with hardware, got some Russian.

He's on line seven, sir.

Hello, gentlemen.

Hello.

Hello. I'm Austin.

Help me!

Help! Help!

Her.

Here.

Hey, listen. Could we stop?

Hey, look! It's Dr. Boyer!

Hi weather transmitted this an hour ago.

Hi yo, Silver! Away!

Hi! Just me.

Hi. Bud Schnelker, liaison office. U.S. consulate, Karachi.

Hi. Heh heh heh.

His father got him his job.

His last job before joining Defense was fixing office copiers.

History demonstrates conclusively that naive wishing for peace...

Hold it, sister. We're not going near that thing. That missile is tipped with...

Hold on one moment.

Honestly. You two are unbelievable.

Hopefully, there won't be any guard posts where we're gonna cross.

Hot! Hot! Hot!

Hours, T minus two until designated target apogee.

How can we get there? It must be 1000 miles from here.

How can you say we aren't spending millions on spraying...

How did you get my papers?

How do you like that? She lets a little thing like death interfere with romance.

How do you spell Sartre? Ow!

How far do we have to go on this bus?

How you doing? Remember me?

However, we can tell you to make immediately...

Huh? Huh!

Huh.

Huh. What about that Chinese radio chatter?

Hyah!

I agree. Let's send them over the border.

I am extremely pissed off. My partner and I were set up.

I believe we've found our decoys.

I can't What page?

I can't take it! I can't! I can't do it!

I cite as an example what happened to a great American

I could tell him what to do, and he'd do it for me.

I don't care how painful it is, you've got to hold them together.

I don't care what you two do, but I'm fulfilling my obligation.

I don't think that's fair. They had swords. What are we supposed to do?

I figure we have 42 minutes until the end of civilization as we know it.

I greased the House Committee for covert appropriations.

I guess that takes care of that.

I guess we walk.

I guess we'll be heading back to the old U.N.

I guess you don't want advancement bad enough.

I had to stay to the very end. I found out I received nothing.

I have a package from the nat sat printing room.

I hear she's very good.

I know the country of origin of every timepiece.

I lost everything at 7,000 feet.

I mean, just to see you perform even the most simple surgery...

I must know right away what I've got to work with.

I object to taking a girl out and buying her dinner and then she won't put out for you.

I say yes, doctor.

I see the chief United States delegate, Mr. Emmett Fitz Hume.

I see. Well...

I think it's our duty as American operatives...

I think we can recall it.

I think we just started World War lll.

I was born into the trade.

I was going to do your family a favor and hook up the Disney Channel...

I was just looking for the Burt Reynolds Theater.

I was probing to determine muscle tone and skeletal girth.

I'd rather not. I don't have my instruments. Ahem.

I'll drive, you sleep.

I'll get the horse.

I'll handle this.

I'll just step out for a smoke.

I'll take you back to the base.

I'm a trained cardiovascular respiratory emergency assist technician.

I'm convinced there's a security leak in your training program.

I'm going to pass that exam, and I'm going to get out of this hole...

I'm not authorized to give you the full operational package...

I'm not either.

I'm so disappointed. And the khan, he'll be very suspicious.

I'm sorry I'm late. I had to attend the reading of a will.

I'm sorry, I'm not myself today. I saw my neurologist this morning.

I'm sure it will only be a matter of minutes before the president commits to total release.

I'm sure you can find a couple of men you won't mind wasting.

I'm very hurt that's why you invited me over here today.

I've got to make the splice. Hold it together.

I've spent the last two and a half years of my life preparing for this penetration.

If anything happens to him, my people will be angry.

If discovered appropriating classified documents at a foreign consulate reception...

If we give ourselves up, the state department can work out an exchange...

IMHAUS: Doctor. Doctor.

In another 15 minutes, it'll all be over.

In fact, I hesitate to mention my problem.

Information like that is given out on a need to know basis only.

Is one of these people our contact?

Is this some kind of a hobby with you?

Isn't now one of those times?

Isn't now one of those times?

Isn't that incision a bit high for an appendix?

It depends on your particular arena of combat.

It just goes to show

It shouldn't be much further now. We've made good time.

It was a static filled, triple scrambled microwave transmission...

It would save us a lot of trouble.

It'll be sub arctic temperatures up there, freezing. You'll thank me.

It's a collect call from ****stan for Mr. Ruby.

It's a highly classified piece of intelligence hardware.

It's a task hardly worthy of your abilities.

It's a very bad time for me.

It's done.

It's my job to get you prepared to go out into the field for combat.

It's not your fault you're stupid.

It's on its way.

It's person to person, sir, collect.

It's Soul Finger by the Bar kays.

It's the khan's brother. He's been suffering from pain in the right lower abdomen.

It's the Tadzhik highway patrol.

Jesus Christ.

Jesus, where'd you learn your Russian, J.C. Penney?

Jump? No chance. We won't have to jump.

Just an idea.

Just give it to me.

KEYES: Beautiful close ups!

Ladies and gentlemen...

Leave it alone.

Let me see that.

Let's get him!

Let's see, 28 minutes. That's 18 until it's inside the U.S. radar cup.

Let's see. A transmission from the field, your GLG 20s.

Let's take him back to headquarters in Moscow.

Level 20.

Listen, we are organizing a rescue operation for you.

Listen. Even if they make it there at all...

Lock us in, sergeant.

Look at that. No feeling at all.

Look at these samples. All multiple choice. It's easy.

Look at this. This is really neat. Ha ha.

Look out!

Look, the longer we keep them out in the field...

Look. Dr. Boyer.

Lunch date, so I must go.

Mark.

MARSTON: Doctor. Doctor.

Maybe this.

Maybe we should start hitchhiking.

Means they're not hooked in to Soviet defense. They are radio isolated.

Means they're not hooked in to Soviet defense. They are radio isolated.

MEN: Hut! Hut! Hut! Hut! Hut!

Michigan reactor and Washington State atomic plants on line, general.

Miegs and Sline will drool.

Miles: Five...

MILLBARGE Emmett!

MILLBARGE: Hard to believe it's been only 15 minutes since I destroyed the world.

MILLBARGE: I'm starving. What time you got?

MILLBARGE: Let go!

MILLBARGE: Let's go!

MILLBARGE: That's an SS 50 long range rocket and mobile launcher.

MILLBARGE: That's it.

Mm...

Most common slip up in espionage. We walked right into enemy hands.

Mr. Emmett Fitz Hume, chief state department negotiator...

Mr. Keyes.

My fault.

My granddad was an envoy. My dad was an envoy.

Nice close ups. Definitely approaching full go hour.

Night.

No can do, sir. The material's locked inside.

No one outside this command center has that information, gentlemen.

No wonder neither of you could do that appendix operation. You're spies like us!

No, no, no. All we have to do is switch sending boards.

No, she's nice.

No, sir, the AT&T operator told our operator.

No, thanks. I've already eaten.

No.

No.

No. Are you kidding? I know the FSB exam backwards.

No...

Not the rock.

Now they're the two best dead men we have.

Now what?

Now what?

Now, if you feel you can work together, you're on your way up.

Now, secret work can be very risky.

Now, wait a minute.

Now...

Obligated involuntary officers.

Of course, after I guide Dr. Greenbaum through an operation, I get very depressed...

Of course.

Oh, God, the pressure! I can't take it!

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God!

Oh, uh...

Oh, you mean my medical papers. Right.

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh! Right! Homer. Of course. What's your name?

Oh! Whoa!

Oh.

Oh. Ah! Oh! Oh! Oh!

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. Who led the American League in home runs in 1953?

One to do the job, the other to be a diversion.

One's got basic diplomacy skills.

Only insofar as it serves to confirm the president's own beliefs.

Only three men.

Only to survive aggravated body temperature measurement.

Ooh!

Open the window. Shout it to Moscow.

Our project orders are to subdue the crew and seize control of this emplacement.

Our whole way of life hangs in the balance, gentlemen.

Pamir? Dushanbe?

Perhaps I'll stay here. Heh heh.

Project? Fitz Hume is in the custody of the Tadzhik highway patrol because of you.

Relax, Mr. Ruby. This facility is more than adequately stocked...

Release full pulse.

RHOMBUS: This is the obstacle course.

Rob Hodges. DIA, West Asian section. Welcome to ****stan.

RUBY: This is Emmett Fitz Hume.

Run your full servo and arming.

SAC COM confirms an outbound blip from Soviet Central Asia.

SAC COM confirms destruction of the inbound at Zulu 3000 hours.

Satscram signal from the strike site.

Say it a little louder.

Security has the key.

Send them the go code.

Servo on and armed.

She wants to know why we would do such a thing.

Sir. Printout from Gravsat.

Sit.

So she's a sophisticated woman.

So thanks for the bruises, and you can keep the stool samples.

So, what are we gonna get? Dismissal? Suspension?

So...

Sophisticated system for sending, scrambling...

Sorry. I...

Soul Finger.

Soul Finger.

Stand back! This man needs air! All of you should leave the room

Stick your tongue out, please.

Stop right there, and I'll bring back the sun.

Suck the paint off your house and give your family an orange Afro.

Take this up. Up. Climb! Uh

TECH 1: SAC COM confirms. All defense systems commitment ready.

TECH 1: SAC override code, entered.

TECH 1: Sir, all air traffic has been diverted from our response corridor.

Tell her so do we.

Thank you very much.

Thank you, doctor.

Thank you, doctor.

Thank you, Ed.

Thank you.

Thank you.

That metal case she was packing on her horse.

That was a Russian copy of a 1969 Timex digital.

That was a Russian wristwatch.

That's 9 a. m. here. Right on schedule.

That's enough.

That's how I welcome new trainees.

That's why they rushed us through training, why we were met by the KGB...

The American sense of humor.

The consequences could be severe.

The drive in is closed.

The Dushanbe road runs across the top of the mountains, the roof of the world.

The first step in an operation of this particular type is...

The khan's brother is being prepped. If you refuse to do this...

The nature of your postings will be secret.

The only project I have to complete is to get my partner out.

The other's a code breaker with language ability.

The road to Dushanbe is a heavily traveled military artery.

The road to Dushanbe?

The second step in an operation of this type is...

The State Ever

The truth is I am a great surgeon.

The United Nations medical effort, of course.

The United States would never The president, our president, had not.

Their contacts tried to kill them and they don't know what to do.

Their request for subsidies was not Paraguayan, as it were.

Then clean up the desk!

There's $1,000 in there...

These are high compression tranquilizer pistols.

These are our newly arrived surgeons, Trowbridge and Greenbaum.

These are the Yusufzai. They're Afghani freedom fighters.

These examinations are qualifiers for positions...

These guys are not our legitimate contacts. These guys are KGB special branch.

They couldn't have done any better with the khan's brother. They aren't doctors.

They do seem to be headed in that general direction.

They got my partner.

They know what they're doing.

They left their Land Rover here.

They only allow us here because we're helping with the wounded.

They put these in cereal boxes for kids.

They sent me here to assassinate your premier.

They surprised us. Border troops.

They think the funds are for more stealth bombers.

They were just sitting there in the dark. They heard our entire conversation.

They'll do anything to save theirjobs.

They're a couple of absolutely self involved bullshit artists...

They're late again. Unusual for soldiers.

They're most likely Chitrali nomads. Not to worry.

They're our allies.

They're saying it'll be 28 minutes before the rocket detonates above its target...

They're spies, but not necessarily on our side.

Things that are square. Things that are being electrocuted?

This afternoon I buried my partner, Jerry Hadley...

This department's laying off civilians left and right.

This is a snap.

This is a Soviet ICBM site.

This is Austin Millbarge.

This is dated two weeks ago.

This is my sister. You can all have her.

This is quite an exciting project you've got here, general.

This is your standard bog negotiation trial.

This man is dead.

This way, gentlemen.

This will verify your ability to stay afloat at high speeds.

Three three nine...

Three...

To die in battle is glorious. To die in a tent is disgrace.

To guarantee the American way of life...

Today we will be removing the patient's appendix.

Two envoys are coming.

Two Pepsis to go.

Use Dr. Hadley's. Please, Homer.

W.A.M.P. secure, sir.

Wait a minute. The Soviet border? How do we get across the Soviet border?

Wait a minute. What's going on here?

Wait for your next contact on the road to Dushanbe.

Wait. Is someone in this closet?

Was it fixed?

Was that me?

Watch your mouth, mister.

We add the element of scorched earth.

We are here today to guarantee the personal freedom of every American.

We are prepared for this contingency.

We did it!

We don't shave, sell the ambulance...

We especially liked the way you guys were working as a team in there.

We have verification. The president is aboard the airborne command center now.

We like what we've seen of you two.

We must make no mistakes this time.

We start with the little one.

We want people who are aggressive...

We were at the drive in!

We'll be fine.

We'll drive in shifts. One drives, the other sleeps.

We'll go on foot from here.

We'll now begin with AFPSR...

We'll now determine your G force threshold. Relax, gentlemen.

We'll skip the shave and go to the operation.

We're inside the Soviet Union.

We're just hitching a ride. They won't make us jump.

We're not doctors.

We're not going to kill anybody...

We're not in trouble?

We're not recruiting for the Boy Scouts.

We're with the Ace Tomato Company.

We've got a very special assignment for you two.

We've got to get out of this place, immediately, if not sooner.

We've had loads of fun here. And, you know, we met new friends...

We've selected two GLG 20s. They're the best men we have.

Welcome to W.A.M.P.

Well, Ed, right now we're at an extremely sensitive juncture.

Well, like he said, we still don't know.

Well, this is it.

Well, what are you saying? That they're spies like us?

Well, wonderful. They confirm estimated arrival...

Well?

What about the Paraguayan army's request for spraying subsidies?

What are they saying?

What can I do for you?

What do you mean, we're not calling anyone?

What do you mean, we're not calling anyone?

What do you mean?

What do you mean? You mean like a defective Pinto?

What do you think?

What happens when the real doctors come?

What in hell do you intend to do?

What is our final objective?

What Little Richard song was the title of a 1950s movie...

What the hell for?

What was the cost of this Star Wars system?

What?

What?

What? You kidding? You're talking to Millbarge here.

What's he doing? That's just their way of saying hello.

What's that?

What's the use? It's probably all over anyway.

When she was a child in Lithuania, her uncle used to tell a story...

When we commissioned the Schmectel Corporation to research...

Where are those contacts we heard so much about?

Where are you going?

Where do we get one?

Who do you intend to call?

Whoa!

Why do we have to carry all this stuff?

Why don't you gentlemen have a Pepsi?

Wiggled into supervisor's pay through an F section.

Will you marry me?

WOMAN: Initiating level yellow.

Would you hold my wallet while I take the test please?

Wouldn't you feel more comfortable being fully relieved...

Wow.

Wrong! It was The Girl Can't Help It.

Yeah, new voice scramblers and everything.

Yeah, sure.

Yeah, the tuna and cream casserole was beautiful.

You are not required to exert yourself.

You are the circuit bridge.

You can always count on our people.

You can't deny what happened between us.

You do it.

You don't feel urgent pressure on the inner wall of your bladder...

You know we'd do anything for you, but we can't go seize that rocket.

You know what they say about this type of operation:

You know what those things can do?

You know, I must really like you because I don't like horses and I hate guns.

You know, if we were sitting in a bar, I'd throw a drink right in your face.

You may begin...

You might think I'm silly to worship you the way I do...

You planned this.

You see, we had to show that we had the technical capability...

You should go too.

You understand, sir...

You wanted to see us, sir?

You were bumped up on the list.

You would have to know that.

You'll be judged on survivability and time.

You'll thank me.

You're a hero of mine. I've read all your papers.

You're about to enter the operational phase of your assignment.

You're good with tools, aren't you? Devices, instruments?

You're not gonna give me some bullshit that you're dying, are you?

You're scheduled for tomorrow morning. I'm sure I told you.

You're talking to Mr. Hands.

You're thinking with your dick.

Your GLG 20s have penetrated successfully and are awaiting the go code.

... a 40 megaton nuclear warhead. Good night, everybody.

... now, right at this moment? No. I'm fine.

... to get us home. Not me!

... why they sent us into enemy hands. Right.

A Mr. Fitz Hume. Ah!

Am I interrupting? No! Not at all. He was just on his way out.

And, doctor. Did we miss anyone?

Are those from the latest fly by? RUBY: Over here, general.

Are you making fun of me? Oh, Karen. Our first fight.

Austin Millbarge? Here, sir.

Break it down again with the machines! I already did.

But, but, but I need...

Bye. Bye.

Come on, superspy, think of something. You're the diplomat. Talk to them.

Come on. Don't tell me to come on.

Decoys?! Lower your voice.

Did they get you too? I'm fine!

Did you say sit? I didn't say sit.

Did you say sit? No, I didn't say sit. What ?

Doctor. Doctor.

Doctor. Doctor.

Doctor. Doctor.

Doctor. Doctor.

Doctor. Doctor.

Don't let the bedbugs bite. Okay.

Dr. Trowbridge. Where?

Emmett Fitz Hume. Austin Millbarge.

Enter first numbered sequence. Go.

Feet. Hat.

Foreign service? Yes.

General Sline, sir. Yes, sergeant?

Gentlemen. Here they are.

Good luck. Listen, captain.

Good night. Good night.

Got it! Ah!

Greenbaum. Berg.

Heads down! Hah! Oh!

Here you go. Done?

Here's a rock. Go to the Satscram terminal.

Hi. Just between us...

How did that happen? I was lifting a car off a child.

How do they get there? That's their problem.

How's our gasoline supply? Eight 5 gallon cans.

I guess we just sit here? Piece of cake.

I knew it! Pay up. Let's cut his fingers off anyway.

I need... The title of a movie?

I wish we hadn't lost Boyer. They were on horseback. We were on foot!

Imhaus. He was cutting into his chest!

Is this the border? No. Toll stop.

It's broken. Bring it here.

Just under 60 billion. Quite a bargain.

Just what are you saying, soldier? We missed it, sir.

Karen. Karen.

Make yourself comfortable. Sit down. Thank you.

Maybe your dick's not so dumb. Got me through high school.

Mine or yours? Yours.

Mr. Ruby. Sir.

My God. Oh, there, there.

No problem. Get your men to cut them down.

Not until I've had Excuse me.

Not yet, no. Possibly tomorrow.

Now what? Smash that thing.

Now, if you'll excuse me, Ed. Thank you, Mr. Fitz Hume.

Obviously an inflamed appendix. Obviously.

Oh. I'm sorry. Excuse me.

Okay, Dostoyevsky, what does it say? It says:

One more step, I swing! He's threatening you!

Open it and get out. It's chained to my wrist.

Ow! I got a shock. And you will.

Place them under arrest. All of them. Wait!

Show some balls! It's too late to try to impress them.

Sleep tight. Thanks.

Thank you. You're welcome.

That enough to get us to an airport? I hope so.

That's right! Kidnapped! RUBY: We were!

The Foreign Service Board? Yeah. Don't you have to study?

Then you'd get a chance see me in action. That would be wonderful.

They didn't realize you were with the effort. With who?

They sure had me fooled. The Soviets obviously know we're here now.

They're insane. And apparently roaming free.

Those places are in Russia? And how.

Undercover work? Yes.

Wait a minute. What are we doing here? This is our final objective.

Wake me up when you get tired. Okay.

We could bypass training. No. They'll go through training.

We did it! We did?

We don't know these men. Oh! We were kidnapped!

We need a plan. Let's play dead.

We'd better call the president. We're not calling anyone.

We'd have to kill everybody down there. And I'm not killing anybody.

What about it? It's a Satscrambler terminal.

What about the rest of their inbounds? TECH 2: There are none, sir.

What about the rest of their inbounds? TECH 2: There are none, sir.

What are they saying? It's 4:47 a. m.

What are you doing here? What are you doing here?

What did he mean by that? Means we're OIO.

What test? Foreign Service Board exams. Good luck.

What? Aren't you taking this test tomorrow?

What? We missed the rocket. It didn't work.

What's a dickfer? To pee with.

What's it say? Pussy.

What's the matter? I gotta take a leak.

What's this? You don't want it!

What's your objective? My objective?

When do we begin our training? Right away.

When's lunch? Come on, guys. Jeep's over here.

Where are we? I don't know. I wasn't watching.

Where are you going? Home.

Where do I ? Sit down!

Where to, boss? First we check our gasoline supply.

Where you going? Home. To study.

Who are you? Oh, sorry.

Whoa! Ooh! MILLBARGE: Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

Why are you here? Why am I here? Why are you here?

Why? That's your name.

Wow. Excellent!

Wow. Excellent!

Yes, sir. Won't you gentlemen have a Pepsi?

You have 30 seconds. You're not gonna hum the Jeopardy theme?

You have a tent? Bring me the Satscram dish.

You hear that? Yeah. It's a dickfer.

You just want to follow her. No.

You mean you're ? Austin Millbarge. I'm a GLG 20.

You want some coffee? Good idea.

You want to go out with a bang? I beg your pardon?

You're sure that's what he said? Right.

...about strange beings that came down from a disk and stole an ox...

...air force passive strain response.

...and D, all three. The answer is D, all three.

...and do some really important work for national security.

...and had a great lunch, right?

...and I quote, Extensive contamination in the Argentine grain fields?

...and kept the best pieces of meat for themselves.

...and were determined.

...anesthetic.

...as of this afternoon, the undersecretary for South American affairs...

...because I couldn't do it myself.

...between two soldiers talking in Mandarin Chinese.

...but I will tell you the location of your initial drop will be well inside ****stan.

...but in my estimation, you're a genius.

...but you've got to get in close to use them.

...could upset everything we've achieved today.