Orville - Season 1 Edit

A "first date."

A and you're not concerned

A bad sunburn.

A big one. And, um,

A black velvet painting of Avis.

A blessed evening.

A circumcision is not a life altering scenario.

A comet that got caught

A computer can talk.

A concentrated dark matter storm.

A crazy good pilot.

A fascinating theory.

A female baby born to a member of an all male species.

A female.

A few hundred years ago, the continents of Earth

A few minor injuries, but the force field snapped on

A field day pulling this thing apart.

A foot on the end of it and everything.

A guard won't matter.

A honey like that, a couple of flies are

A hundred thousand people.

A krill destroyer entering orbit.

A krill destroyer entering orbit.

A Krill destroyer.

A life

A life altering scenario,

A lot of guys are weird about it, yeah?

A marriage is work.

A massive bio vessel adrift in space.

A Minister Kaybrak.

A Moclan writer of great esteem.

A name would be inappropriate at this time.

A necessary medical procedure on my child.

A new captain and first officer.

A pizza party?

A pretty good job getting over all this

A promise that all negotiators will be forthright

A quick and easy way to get you to trust me.

A really cool person. Really?

A sesame seed.

A ship like yours was destroyed.

A ship?

A smart one, isn't he?

A starship on active duty?

A thousand light years from Earth,

A tiny little drill.

A transgender operation on a baby?

A transmission from Moclus.

A transport ship has been attacked

A vessel was requested by one of your officers.

A weapon, is it?

A what?

A what?

A wonderful idea.

A world existing in perpetual night.

A year ago after I walked in on her banging a retepsian.

About 3,000, spread over the whole quadrant, which,

About 400 years in your future.

About average for a newborn Moclan.

About how long it takes a redwood to grow.

About leaving so abruptly before.

About the fact that his girlfriend

About the other stuff?

About the personnel manifest.

About this as they are?

About this situation.

About two hours.

About two minutes out, sir.

About two minutes out, sir.

About what I said in the shuttle.

About what we'd discovered.

About what?

About your society would be helpful.

Above all other forms of life.

Absolutely do that.

Absolutely not!

Absolutely not.

Absolutely out of the question, Lieutenant.

Access entertainment database.

Access ship's cultural library.

According to Isaac,

According to the communication buoy they left behind,

According to the ship's schematics,

Acknowledged.

Across the border and infiltrate a Krill vessel.

Actually, captain, we we don't need any supplies.

Actually, I had to think a second.

Actually, the folks up on the bridge

Adjust your weapons array to flood the area

Admiral Tucker's orders.

Admiral, there has to be someone with more undercover experience.

Adrift in space.

Advocate Grayson,

Advocate Grayson, begin your inquiry.

Advocate Grayson?

Advocate Kagus,

Advocate Kagus, please begin your inquiry.

Advocate, would you do me a favor and reshape this cube?

Affirmative, sir.

Affirmative. Total blackout.

After everything you've done for me.

After the, um, infidelity.

After two millennia.

After what they saw you do today...

Again, sorry for the intrusion.

Again.

Against some universal code of ethics.

Ah, ah, Kel, I'm I'm always the car.

Ah, come on. You're laid up anyway.

Ah, crap! Sorry, man, you okay?

Ah, Ed.

Ah, I can respect that.

Ah, I miss him.

Ah, I see.

Ah, I see.

Ah, the Anhkana.

Ah, there we go. That's what I'm looking for.

Ah!

Ah!

Ah! Damn it.

Ah.

Ah.

Alara Kitan.

Alara,

Alara, get the device back to the shuttle.

Alara, good work.

Alara, hail the colony.

Alara, hail the commander of the krill ship.

Alara, hail them.

Alara, hail them.

Alara, open a hailing channel.

Alara, put him back on.

Alara, put the krill on hold.

Alara, send a message we're on our way.

Alara, that is a cold blooded order,

Alara, those are testing zones.

Alara, what are you doing here?

Alara, would you mind taking a whack at it?

Alara, you did great.

Alara, you okay?

Alara, you want to open this jar of pickles for me?

Alara, you want to open this jar of pickles?

Alara, you're with us.

Alara!

Alara?

Alara. Can you hear me?

Alara. Come on in.

Alara. You want to open this jar of pickles for me?

All departments show green, sir.

All friggin' day.

All good vibes.

All hands, this is Acting Captain Kitan.

All Kaylon are assembled by a central production facility

All members of their species

All right

All right, commander, you win.

All right, commander. You have it.

All right, damn you, give her this.

All right, everybody settle in.

All right, get ready. Doc, stay behind alara.

All right, he's got a gun.

All right, I'll be back.

All right, I'm up, I'm up.

All right, Isaac, head back to the shuttle,

All right, Isaac, it's all up to you.

All right, just stay calm.

All right, let's get her out of here.

All right, lieutenant Alara Kitan, our chief of security.

All right, look, even if I was not against this,

All right, send it to my station.

All right, send us a manifest of everything you need

All right, sir. Shoving beam on.

All right, so that's not gonna work.

All right, stand by. We're sending help.

All right, switch 'em on.

All right, time to meet the locals.

All right, uh, lieutenant commander bortus,

All right, we're on our way. Mercer out.

All right, what is so urgent?

All right.

All right.

All right.

All right.

All right. All right.

All right. Attention, Krill ship,

All right. Let's go.

All right. Weapons on stun.

All sections reporting.

All the information I can about it.

All the time... their records are usually sloppy.

All we know of their religion

All you have to do is tell me where the others are.

Alpha, three, zero, zero.

Although, a Xelayan female

Always keeps his cool

Always like to keep the customer happy.

Am I supposed to just take your word

Amazing.

An artific... What?

An ideal site, yes.

An impact from this height would result in death

An intact, functioning Krill shuttle.

An object of disgust.

And a life altering scenario

And although I regret sleeping with Darulio...

And and he smelled like sausage.

And and then there's this cough.

And as a bonus, a healthy snack.

And as far as how that affects your future time,

And as your first officer, I would advise you

And Avis has touched us

And bring it into the shuttle bay to examine it for clues.

And built our family a home.

And by "differences," you mean the fact that

And by the way, by the way, yes,

And Commander Grayson.

And despite all of your claims that you still care about me,

And don't spill any, sure

And drop all your weapons now.

And eradicate individual cancer cells?

And everything. It's real nice, right?

And finally, Isaac,

And for outstanding courage, valor,

And for you to put me in the captain's chair...

And free from deception.

And get the fuel that I needed, or sit around and wait to die.

And good job...

And has made... Well, a breakthrough

And have it sent to your quarters this afternoon.

And have them send a special training crew

And have you found the wisdom you seek?

And he doesn't even seem to care, you know?

And he smashes his balls, that's funny.

And he's a friend of mine.

And here you are ransacking a room?

And I ask you this.

And I became convinced that I was...

And I didn't give us the time that we deserved.

And I do not believe the captain would be able to divert course.

And I do not believe the Moclan ship will, either.

And I encountered a Krill battle cruiser.

And I figured I'd wronged you so badly

And I hadn't... done what I did...

And I just want to make sure that's still okay.

And I just woke up a little while ago.

And I love him.

And I moved on board with you.

And I plan on keeping it that way.

And I sell it to the highest bidder.

And I think you'd make a fine addition to this crew.

And I was telling them you're actually

And I will not perform a sex change on a newborn infant.

And I'll be out of your hair by the end of the day.

And I'm guessing he doesn't know about your "Kelly" request?

And I'm over it, so why don't you tell me

And if that doesn't work, offer evacuation ships.

And if we went to war, they'd see it as a holy crusade,

And if we're still here tomorrow,

And if you didn't make that effort,

And if you make a stink about an xo assignment

And if your balls are under par, I'll know.

And in a century you'll have a towering redwood.

And in less than six months,

And is it your wish to deny your offspring

And it burrows in there for the winter,

And it has nothing to do with the goo goo eyes

And it kicked in when we got to the theater,

And it's been a difficult time.

And it's been drifting for 2,000 years.

And just getting weird and sloppy some night,

And let us explain..

And my ex wife, Kelly Grayson.

And my friends always make me play the human.

And no matter how much in love they are,

And now we're talking about killing everybody on board.

And once they boarded it, the whole thing just disappeared.

And perhaps I will not harm you.

And please tell me if I'm out of line.

And post a guard on these quarters.

And prepare to be boarded.

And remember, you bashed the hell out of Maureen's head

And resourcefulness, in the finest Union tradition,

And second of all, even if there were,

And second of all, even if there were,

And she needs a helmsman.

And she's healthy.

And sheared off a cargo bay door.

And so what made you request this ship?

And sometimes the other one has sex with a blue alien.

And tell their younger self

And that's Isaac.

And the admiral's right.

And the field can accelerate time a hundred years.

And the infant has no say in the matter.

And the left and the right...

And the Orville goes on to live its life.

And the other one was high fiving him.

And the staff profile compatibility program

And the wrong kind take advantage of them.

And their really good friends who they haven't seen

And then some.

And they view any species at a lesser technological level

And this is my security chief,

And this is our engine room.

And this is... Devon.

And this little guy was the best part of the bargain.

And to answer your questions.

And today, they wished to carry out the word of Dorahl.

And took lots of pictures while visiting their daughter,

And trust me, it's an art form.

And use our emitters to activate the weapon.

And very dark and very lonely.

And wake up with a third eye or an extra kidney

And we all know that Malloy is the best pilot in the fleet.

And we had the doctor remove it.

And we knew that a journey to even the nearest

And we must give him a good life.

And we will take the child with us.

And we wouldn't have any moral qualms about it.

And we'd be able to do it remotely

And we're about 12 seconds away from hitting you

And we're cleared for departure.

And we're offering you command.

And we're trying to help you

And we've been unable to restart our engines.

And were taken illegally.

And what about me?

And what is this?

And what might that be?

And what that clothing is

And when did you find out?

And when the Kakov was destroyed,

And when the Kakov was destroyed,

And where are the others?

And while it might have saved me an entire marriage if they had,

And why did you not tell me then?

And why do you not wait and let the child decide for himself

And why?

And with this,

And you and I will never have met.

And you are my first officer, all right?

And you can shove it up your ass.

And you got to be creative.

And you knew I hated opera, so you made me smoke that joint

And you knew I hated opera, so you made me smoke that joint

And you know how many times I tried

And you know how the fleet admirals are.

And you sit on it?

And you used me.

And you'll be okay.

And you're acting like it's some big joke.

And you're heading right toward a star.

And you're still awkward in the elevator.

And you're telling me she's okay with this?

And you've provided both.

And, Captain, it so happens we're carrying two passengers

And, for that matter, your planet is a member of the Union.

And, uh, if you got one more in you,

And, uh, thank him again for his hospitality.

Answer him.

Answer my question.

Any good bars?

Any less than they would a male baby, do you?

Any life form readings?

Any weekend plans?

Any word?

Anything out of the ordinary

Anyway, what is it you want?

Apparently, having a girlfriend

Apparently, the atmosphere of the Krill home world

Approaching artificial mass, Captain.

Approaching Calivon system.

Approaching ionosphere, adjusting attitude.

Approaching the border of Calivon space, sir.

Approaching the transport, sir, it's the USS Bleriot.

Approximately 400,000 kilometers to port.

Arbitrator,

Arbitrator,

Arbitrator,

Arbitrator, to my knowledge,

Arbitrator, would you be so kind

Are are they big? They big eggs?

Are communications completely down?

Are going to have a child.

Are gonna be digging through this for months.

Are significantly superior to our own.

Are there cultures within the Union

Are we united as a people

Are you all finished?

Are you aware of this?

Are you aware that by electing

Are you busy at the moment?

Are you doubting it?

Are you from Beyond?

Are you from the Underland?

Are you gonna be able to cut the deflectors

Are you married?

Are you real?

Are you really bringing this up right now?

Are you stripping?

Are you, what is the term?

Are...

Aren't you guys legendarily racist?

Arrangements have been made to return them

Arrangements may be made at the central medical facility

Artificial? Like a ship?

As a first attempt to visit another planet.

As a member of the crew

As a radiation check.

As a woman without regret.

As am I.

As an effort to initiate relations

As awful as that sounds.

As experienced as you were expecting,

As fast as you want, sir.

As he loves to remind everyone,

As his father wished.

As if all this couldn't get any more complicated.

As inconspicuously as you can,

As inferior, if that is your inference.

As inferior.

As long as he's with us.

As long as the wormhole exists,

As soon as another xo becomes available,

As soon as the surge is initiated,

As soon as you bite, you're transported here.

As soon as your repairs are complete,

As they see fit in the 29th century.

As to loan me your gavel thingy?

As we are a self contained artificial ecosystem

Ashton to krill vessel. It's time.

Aside from shooting your dad, we don't mean your family any harm.

Associated with this designation.

At 1300 hours, ship's time.

At a specific intensity the moment

At comedy with you anymore.

At comedy with you anymore.

At least we won't starve.

At the arrival of his first officer.

At the moment of the incident,

Atop the Moclan Central Arcade.

Attention, Krill ship,

Avis?

Avoid any epidemics among the exhibits.

Aw, man, they're getting clobbered.

Aye, commander.

Aye, sir

Aye, sir

Aye, sir.

Aye, sir.

Aye, sir.

Aye, sir.

Aye, sir.

Aye, sir.

Aye, sir.

Aye, sir.

Aye, sir.

Aye, sir.

Aye, sir.

Aye, sir.

Aye, sir. Departing dockyard.

Back off!

Back off! Back off. Look, you...

Back, back, back, back, back.

Bad "yolk."

Baral.

Based on where I think I'm needed

Basically makes a kamikaze dive

Be back at the helm for a lot longer than this, if ever

Be careful.

Be very, very careful.

Beats the heart of civilization."

Became a supreme advantage.

Because a month has passed.

Because I couldn't risk

Because I did not want to lose you.

Because I have witnessed events that have opened my eyes.

Because I will not perform a sex change

Because of our planet's harsh climate,

Because there are folds, you know?

Because we all know how easy it is

Because we're going anyway.

Before entering someone else's quarters?

Before the comet gets too close to the star,

Before the departure of the starship Orville.

Before the energy burst.

Before we left.

Before you fall into that star

Being a girl is not a condition.

Being here, in this place.

Being the strongest person on the ship, you know.

Besides the fact that we have the widest variety of species

Besides, we're incompatible species.

Better yet, off?

Between kaylon and the union, we accepted.

Biggest bio ship anyone's ever seen.

Bill Nye the Cancer Guy?

Bingo.

Biologically, intellectually and socially.

Bleriot, this is Captain Ed Mercer

Boom.

Boring damn job there is.

Bortus and Klyden,

Bortus here, sir.

Bortus is in his quarters warming an egg.

Bortus to bridge.

Bortus to captain Mercer.

Bortus to Dr. Finn.

Bortus, can't it wait, man?

Bortus, I wish to talk.

Bortus, I'm sorry. I'm not gonna do it. All right?

Bortus, prepare to launch all plasma torpedoes simultaneously

Bortus, that is completely different.

Bortus, that is completely unethical.

Bortus, that's great.

Bortus, the captain says get your ass up here.

Bortus, the krill are here to attack.

Bortus, there's no way in hell I'm doing that.

Bortus, this is not an illness.

Bortus, you cannot be serious.

Bortus, you have the conn.

Bortus, you have the conn.

Bortus, your people are members of the Union.

Bortus.

Bortus.

Bortus. How are you?

Bortus. What happened to you?

Bortus. What happened to you?

Break off your attack, and we can talk.

Bridge to all senior officers.

Bridge to shuttle bay.

Bridge to sickbay. Dr. Finn, assemble a medical team.

Bring him out.

Buddies for life.

But also one that you're glad to be serving on.

But as far as I'm concerned, they can bite me

But as your XO, I am telling you,

But by his sword."

But Commander Grayson taught me the basics,

But could not the entry of a confection

But he is not Krill.

But he's a smart officer who just had a little rough patch.

But I am also a bridge officer.

But I believe it may have been a form of molecular transfer.

But I can bring it over by remote guidance, on your order.

But I can promise you that you won't be harmed.

But I do know that if we destroy this ship

But I gave him a really neat personality.

But I i am sorrier for what I did to you

But I only did it because I didn't have you.

But I swear to you...

But I want to know

But I will give you some advice. Now, sit.

But I'll do it... If you promise me one thing.

But I'll try to be your Obi Wan however I can.

But if any of your research team

But if it affects your judgment as an officer,

But if you will indulge me momentarily,

But in his death,

But it is an exploratory vessel.

But it turns out he has a massive hang up

But it will take every ounce of power we can spare,

But it's across the atrium.

But it's getting pretty hot in here.

But it's in the past.

But it's not.

But maybe there's something we missed

But navigation will need to be precise.

But on Earth, it's different all over the planet.

But she's alive.

But she's really green.

But she's still short a helmsman and a first officer.

But she's the only qualified xo available.

But that is no longer possible.

But the captain and the first officer are gone!

But the Krill are an exception.

But then there's the captain,

But then, you have earned that right.

But there are 300 people on board the Orville

But there are over 100,000 people in that colony.

But this past year, the the... tardiness,

But to derive mirth from the pain of another being

But unless we encounter help,

But until now, we had no proof.

But we have 3,000 ships to staff, and we need captains.

But we have a different plan in mind.

But we have something better.

But we were hit by an ion storm,

But we'll we'll figure something out.

But we're awfully good with office politics.

But we're in need of extensive repairs.

But we're in one piece.

But what about the captain and the commander?

But what about the kids?

But you can count on me.

But you didn't. And they weren't.

But you get the idea.

But you have to balance that

But you haven't really inspired anyone

But you want to know.

But your crew was going to murder

But your goons shot my friend.

But, apparently, you're not.

But, Ed, we discovered an object.

But, if we destroy it, we choose a path.

But, if you take that kind of risk and you're wrong,

But, look, Kel, it doesn't matter. You know?

But, sir, if there's any chance that they're still alive...

But, whatever happens,

But, when I really stopped to think about it,

But... I don't know, at the same time

By a dense cloud cover that obscures 96%

By a factor of 10,000.

By Dorahl's truth and love?

By methodically dismembering them.

By the interpersonal behavior of biological organisms.

By the very fact that we are the ones

By the way, Chris and Devon?

By the way, even if I was,

By the way, this was an inspired idea.

Bye.

Calivon patrol ship approaching.

Call off your attack on the surface or we will respond.

Called Central Perk.

Calm down, ed, and be professional about this.

Can beat the crap out of him with one finger, so...

Can get blue out of a white lampshade.

Can I ask you something?

Can I come in?

Can I have everyone's attention, please?

Can I have one of these mints?

Can I please wear shorts to work?

Can I sit here?

Can it not wait until a later hour?

Can scan your computers and then instantly

Can they be allowed to live amongst us?

Can you align the shuttle bay doors with their trajectory?

Can you do it?

Can you eat this napkin?

Can you eat this?

Can you identify it?

Can you preset the field to fire up

Can you restore enough power to the lower engine

Can you stand up?

Can you tell her to come straight to my office?

Can you tell me what sort of vessel this is?

Can you, um... Can you remove it?

Can't be a ship. It's too big.

Can't tell what's inside.

Can't you just come up with some reason that I'm unfit?

Can't... can't do that in these.

Capable of speeds exceeding ten light years per hour.

Capable of such rapid helm adjustments.

Captain Lavesque, stand by. We're gonna get you out of there.

Captain Lavesque.

Captain Lavesque's quarters.

Captain Mercer,

Captain Mercer, this is a game changer.

Captain Mercer, we've been raided by a Krill destroyer.

Captain Mercer.

Captain Mercer.

Captain Vorak, I formally request tribunal.

Captain Vorak, I will not allow that child to be taken

Captain,

Captain,

Captain,

Captain,

Captain,

Captain,

Captain, analysis of the hull indicates the ship

Captain, can I go finish my leg now?

Captain, do you read?

Captain, Dr. Finn has refused to perform

Captain, he's already signaling us.

Captain, I am informing you that we are sending a ship

Captain, I believe we may have encountered

Captain, I can put her to sleep

Captain, I do not understand the reason for this conflict.

Captain, I have accessed a recording

Captain, I implore you...

Captain, I must speak with you immediately.

Captain, I request that you be my advocate.

Captain, I think I should stay.

Captain, I think you and Commander Grayson

Captain, I've never even seen a dark matter storm,

Captain, in human biology,

Captain, let me see that shoulder.

Captain, permission to return to the Orville.

Captain, please listen to me.

Captain, please report to the bridge.

Captain, respectfully submit that the attractiveness

Captain, since my primary function

Captain, that'll create a lot of friction.

Captain, the ship is already scanning us.

Captain, there are krill soldiers heading down to you.

Captain, there's a message coming in

Captain, this is Mining Chief Leidecker.

Captain, we are receiving a distress signal.

Captain, we're approaching the coordinates.

Captain, we're receiving

Captain, we've received the green light from dockyard tower

Captain.

Captain.

Captain. Do you read?

Captain...

Captain...

Captain...

Captain... look.

Cease fire immediately, or we will respond.

Channel open.

Channel open.

Check in with the, uh, "Capitan."

Check them for what?

Check your monitor.

Chief, unless we know where

Chief, was anyone injured in the rupture?

Chief, what's the matter?

Chief.

Children,

Chris and Devon.

Chris and Devon. Why not?

Chris, I think I can see Earth

Chris, what are you doing?!

Chris. Devon.

Chris. You've returned.

Christmas would have been ruined

Circumcised?

Claire and Isaac and I will take the port side.

Claire, look, just let me take you out on one date.

Claire?

Closing on us; It is a Krill destroyer.

Coffee.

Coja, I'm sorry, but you need to go now.

Coja!

Coja.

Come in!

Come in.

Come in.

Come in.

Come in.

Come in.

Come in.

Come in.

Come inside. I'll explain.

Come on, guys.

Come on, let's go see the Krill.

Come on, man, you got this.

Come on, put your hands up.

Come on, we got to get out of here.

Come on!