Super Troopers (2001) Soundboard Edit

Ah, fuck it.

Ain't no better you can do

All right, all right. Fair is fair.

All right, Thorny. Why'd you call me up here?

All right, we got a chance here.

And don't forget to tap that keg, guys.

And extreme police corruption."

And, uh, Jerry Giraffe and Arty the Alligator and bring them in for a lineup.

Beat it!

Bullshit.

But, uh, Abraham Lincoln here, he says that I'm 21...

Can't catch the Rabbit.

Coffee's served!

Come on, Dad! Faster! Faster!

Come on, Rabbit. You can do it.

Could do for you to avoid this dilemma?

Could you hold on a minute? Just a minute. I'll be right back.

Count to ten, take some deep breaths.

Ditch it, man! Ditch it!

Don't use that boyfriend voice with me. What are you doing?

Drop your coat and grab your toes.

Farva, clean the cells! I'm a cop, goddamn it!

Foster, how many tickets did you issue last week?

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

Get the reefer, and get it to the governor before she leaves?

Give me a, uh, double bacon cheeseburger.

He strangles her and puts her face in pig food?

He's already pulled over!

He's right in front of the building. Go look. I'll hold.

Here they Here they come.

Here we go again What the fuck?

Hey, I got no hard feelings. Nothin' a few beers can't fix, right?

Hey, what happened over there?

Hey. Stop jumping on the bed.

Holy shit. What's Grady doin' up there?

I applied for a guard job. At the post office.

I don't get it. Tacos?

I mean, because I'm ready to go out on patrol.

I think she's got a lot of decisions to make.

I would have smothered you by now.

I'm cool. I'm cool.

I'm gettin' shut down. That's a big difference

I'm glad you called. Listen. I have Bobby the Baboon in lockup...

I'm sorry, Bruce. These boys get that syrup in them...

I'm sorry, Officer, for the speeding violation.

In our state's War on Drugs.

In the black and blue light

Is that why you choose to treat us with such disrespect?

It must have been, like, a double homicide or something fuckin' cool.

It's a good thing you didn't order hash browns.

John Chimpo, I'm told

Kill it.

Let's face it

Listen to me, Foster. I need to tell you something.

Listen, Officers, I'm on a really tight schedule. I really need to

Look, I'm done dickin' around. We got new evidence on your murder.

Man, it's probably better for the flow...

Maybe we should take another look.

Mike, you didn't eat both those bags, did you?

Mr. "Sunshine on My Goddamn Shoulders," John Denver.

Ninety one, are you there?

No shit?

No? This is basically a cheaper Afghani knockoff.

Now they've taken a jurisdictional grievance against us.

Now, either you scratch my back or you're gonna get my size ten boot up your ass!

Oh, fuck it!

Oh, I think we're pretty well covered, Mr. Mayor.

Oh, yeah, that's next week.

Ping! Ping!

Rabbit, get this meatball out of here.

Rabbit, put your game face on.

Say, Rod, what are your plans after the shutdown?

Sir, this is a police channel. Please get off of it.

Soap, I think.

Tell 'em all to fuck off Tell 'em all to fuck off

Thanks, Chief

That was good, man.

There you go.

They think I'm Mexican.

They're both kinda fat and stupid.

Those stickers had the same monkey logo

Trust me, bro. There's nothing there.

Uh, right.

We should probably do that

Well, around my house, my wife knows to refill the T.P.

What in hell's gotten into you guys?

What? What?

Whoo ooo ooo!

With those thin little bird lips you got there.

Would you mind stepping down from there with your license and registration?

Yeah

Yeah, it is.

Yeah, yeah

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. I'll be right back.

Yeah. That's a good one.

You got to get over there and you got to cuff her.

You got to promise me no more bullshit.

You guys watch that Johnny Chimpo thing?

You know, you can't tell anybody about this.

You want me to come in there, boy? I'll come in there!

You're all under arrest!

All right, all right. Windows down! Windows down!

All right. Somebody get me a VTR copy of this thing.

Big Bear He looks like a rug

But I I just gave you it, Officer. License and registration.

but I think you can do ten. Ten?

Candy bars! Littering and Littering and

Check it. Roger, 23.

Chief! Put a bullet in him, Grady.

Cut him loose. Go ahead, Smy.

D Do I look high? Yeah.

Disregard that, Rabbit. And you didn't even think to call in your partner?

Foster, where are your shoes? What, are you the shoe police now?

Glamour pet. No dice. Get your tape. Okay. Let's cruise.

He don't take no guff He's Big Bear

Hey! Mr. Galilkanolkus! Whoa!

Hit! Yea!

Huh. That'll happen. That will happen.

It's powdered sugar. The lice hate the sugar.

Littering. Officer, that that's not ours.

Move it, move it, move it. We want a drink! Come on.

Oh, I got brass buns. You should join the band.

Oh, man! What happened here? Take a walk, sonny.

Oh, Thorny! No, no, no. Please. Come on.

Only in my day, the rookie got naked. Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Pay up. When do I get to do that?

Really. How'd you know the key was there? A gentleman never asks.

Smy, you mark it off. Back it up, Grady. I'm serious.

So what's the deal with you and Bobbi? Come on, Dad!

Sounds like y'all have a hog problem. Oh, watch it, Mac.

This thing with Farva screwed our pooch. What?

Uh, sixty five? Sixty three

What did you find out at the weigh station? My cruiser weighs 16,000 kg.

What're you doin'? Ursula! I love you, Ursula.

Whatever's free. Take it easy, Rod.

Who'll bust heads on the highway? The goddamn local cops!

Whoo! What the fuck!

Wow! Replaced by John Fuckin' Denver

Yeah, we used to be cops, remember? Shh! I remember

Yes, sir? Yes, sir.

You know what this is? A chamois cloth?

Your black magic only works on the rookie. That's brown magic

'Cause I'm gonna start looking for a new job

"Dear John...

"Sincerely...