The Secret Life of Pets (2016) Edit

A ittle wet, but I still look good! I look good!

A spoon?

Aaahh!

Aaahhh!

Aaahhh!

Aah!

Aah! oh!

Aahh!

Aahhh!

Aahhh!

Aahhh!

Aahhh!

Aahhh!

Adorable buffy dog.

After a while you'll think it's him, you'll be done.

Ah!

Ah! 100% percent wrong.

Ah! Aww!

Ahh!

Ahh!

Ahh!

Ahh!

Ahh! Whoa! Ahhh!

Ahh! Whoa! Whoa!

Ahhh! Ahhhh!

Ahhhh!

Ahhhh!

Ain't that right, Seamonkeys?

All is fine!

Alright, doggie, come on.

Alright, guys. Let's do this.

Alright, look. I'll tell you what.

Alright, now these guys are a bit testy.

Alright, party is over.

Alright, show her.

Alright, time to work the gift.

Alright, you guys are joining The Brotherhood.

Alright. Fine, fine.

And as your friend, I gotta be honest with you,

And dog people do wierd, inexplicable things, like...

And get this. She was looking for a roommate,

And he's scary, and he's threatening,

And he's the death of all good things.

And I don't, I don't even have a bed, now.

And I'm gonna have to ask you to get off my lawn

And I'm gonna wait for Katie to come back.

And I'm her lawyer protector.

And I'm the luckiest dog in New York,

And if I go back...

And if it's gonna come down to you or me?

And it's got buck teeth, and a cottontail!

And leading us home.

And made me disappear...

And of course my girlfriend ,Ronda!

And she's like, Yeah, fine.

And so was I!

And some might say my boyfriend!

And soon,

And that big fat brown dog, he gonna get it, too.

And the kid was like, Oh, wolves!

And the kid was like, Oh, wolves!

And then, round on just the end of it.

And when I get angry, I do this...

And when I wake up, I'm in Florida!

And yes, this is a very good thing for you.

And you are just a lonely old bird,

And you do have weird manners,

And, I'm gonna go look for Max no matter who's with me.

And, when that random cat tried to eat Sweet Pea,

And, why... Why would Fred get a cat?

And... Hey, Duke! Why'd you going do this for?

Any plans today?

Are you stalling?

Are you trying to get rid of me?

Argh!

Argh! I'm gonna...

Argh.

As proof of your allegiance,

As shoobop sha wadda wadda yippity boom de boom.

As you see, I've return from the surface with two new recruits.

Attack on, three, two...

Aww!

Aww!

Aww!

Aww! Aahh!

Aww! Hey, there cute little bunny.

Aww! My boys!

Ball! Ball! Ball!

Bam! Bam!

Bang! Bang! With our own paws.

Because it is offensive to our kind, but you're a bad dog.

Because of her.

Because you live in a weird shed on a roof.

Because, here they come...

Because, I mean come on, right? It's peanut butter.

Because, she's a dog person, Max.

Before I answer that...

Before I get... Um...

Best friend?

Between you and the fat dog? I like you the best.

Blah!

Boss. I can't tell thogh what it is.

Bottom line is, I'm coming right to you, Tiny Dog.

Bottom line is, I'm coming right to you, Tiny Dog.

Boy, let me tell you, we got along right away.

Break away move!

Brown and white, he's a short hair,

Buddy said that maybe you could help us?

Buddy, Mile! When you were fixed,

Buddy, there you are. Did you find it?

Bunny, I'm gonna love you forever and ever, and ever!

Bunny!

But for me, every breath is a cliffhanger!

But not so sweet, there's also a salty, gainly thing going on.

But then, bunny tricks went out of style.

But understand this, from now on you work for me.

But you're helping.

But, I knew this is gonna work out.

But, I think it's gonna be a great thing in the long...

But, if you don't do something about this guy.

But, it never works!

But, Katie and I have a different relationship.

But, now that I know you, I'm like...

But, one of those food bowls technically, it's reserved for...

But, the outside world is loud and scary... Whoa!

But, we gotta join forces, man!

But, you know what?

But, you... But, you don't really appreciate them until...

But, you're not drowning, and that's something.

But...

Butterfly!

By the time, I'd caught up with it and ate it!

By the way that is... That is one gorgeous bed.

Bye, everyone.

Bye, Sweet Pea.

Bye.

Calm down, girl. He's right...

Can I call you, tiny dog?

Can I help you?

Can you tell 'em, Snowball? Tell them!

Can't do it.

Chang chang changitty chang shoobop.

Chang chang chanitty chang sha bop.

Chloe!

Chuck! Chuck!

Chuck! Chuck! Chuck! Chuck! Chuck!

Come back here, you dogs!

Come on, boys!

Come on, Gidget. We go out there without a leash?

Come on, girl. Max doesn't even know you're alive.

Come on, let's get you outta that shed

Come on, let's go! Move it or lose it.

Come on, man! Hurry it up!

Come on, slowpokes

Come on, we gotta get to shore.

Come on! Come on!

Crazy bird.

Dah!

Death is coming to Brooklyn.

Derick, you idiot! Did they all get away?

Didn't have to be this way, Max.

Do you ever wonder where they go during the day?

Do you know what? I just, I don't really care.

Do you see the van?

Do you smell that?

Does anyone know where we are?

Domestics?

Don't faff for it!

Don't leave out nothing. We love gory detail here.

Don't look at him, look at me!

Don't you trying hide. I can see you... Ahh!

Don't you worry, Viper! You will not be forgotten!

Dude, I'm a cat.

Duke is just ruining our lives.

Duke, hang on!

Duke, Katie is not...

Duke, let's eat!

Duke, maybe we shoyld go.

Duke, Please!

Duke, This's the best part of the day!

Duke, you have nothing to be nervous about.

Duke!

Duke! It's time to go.

Duke?

Enchanté.

Even though, any sane person who saw us would.

Every bird instinct I have says, Don't follow a dog on wheels.

Everybody else need a pet talk.

Everybody, run!

Excellent.

Few days later, I was picked up by animal control.

Finally get you, big fella.

Finally, we're going home.

Find a really good one, Duke.

Follow me.

Food? I didn't say that. I said friend.

Foreve, yeah. That's what I just...

Forgot my phone!

Fred? The old guy?

Friends. I'm afraid that I have some terrible news.

From his life!

Fueled by a diet of anti human rage!

Get down here.

Get off me, pig!

Get off!

Getting there is gonna take days.

Gidget, here's an idea,

Give us detail.

Go ahead, tell 'em the whole story about how you took out your owner.

Go home, Max!

Go, Max!

Good boy.

Good enough.

Gosh, there are a lot of you up there.

Gotta run home to thier owners!

Great. Listen mr. Pops. Our friend Max was taken.

Guarantee, this is the ball.

Guys, seriously. Where is Max?

Guys! I want you to tell 'em how you did it.

Ha ha! That...

Ha!

Ha!

Ha! Yes! Mmmm.

Haha, ha! That guy, huh? Am I right?

Half blind Viper,

Have you ever lived across from someone your whole life...

Hay!

Hay!

He also said, big fat brown dog. Like Max's new roommate.

He didn't have a home.

He died, tho. R.I.P, Ricky.

He died.

He got taken. Please, have mercy!

He hates cats.

He Huh!

He stool my...

He was so cool.

He... Um...

He's got Snowball!

He's my friend!

He's not going to eat us. We've already been over it.

He's ruin... It's an emergency that you get rid of this dog.

He's talk about the blender, guys.

Hel.. Hel.. Help Help, Help!

Here again?

Here they are.

Here you go.

Here you go.

Het those leash lovers!

Hewo! That was a close one.

Hey, buddy. I don't ask what it's call,

Hey, Chloe.

Hey, fellas. Who's it... Uhwah!

Hey, fellas. Who's it... Woah!

Hey, I got it. I'm stubborn, too.

Hey, Max!

Hey, Maximillian. How's your day, buddy?

Hey, Mel. Where've you been, man?

Hey, of course he liked you. he was your owner!

Hey, Pops.

Hey, what's going on?

Hey, you cry baby! Where is the Viper at?

Hey, you little...

Hey!

Hey!

Hey! Fellas! Huweeh!

Hey! Hey! Hey!

Hey! Hey! Uh, Gidget! Wait up!

Hey! It's not our fault we don't look like the ad.

Hey! Little guy!

Hey! Where you think you're going?

Hey! You stay away from...

Hi, Chloe. If anyone ask,

Hi, it's me. Hi!

His owner is never home so, it's kind of a hotspot.

Hit the button on this machine...

Hold on, I'm coming!

Hold on!

Holy Schnitzel!

How about we can both fit in this bed,

How do I smell?

How many people wanna know how to kill somebody with a spoon?

How you've been, old timer?

Huh!

Huh!

Huh!

Huh!

Huh! Ah! Whoah!

Huh! Ah! Whoah!

Huh! He's gone.

Huh! Max's collar! Where is he?

Huh! That car's new!

Huh?

Huh?

Humph! Thanks a lot, Duke.

Hurry up! Come on in!

I ain't no pets.

I always said, squirrels are little shifty, little guys.

I ca... I can't!

I can see from miles.

I can't beleive you know, Tiny Dog.

I can't help it! I was born with killer instincts!

I couldn't find it.

I don't fully trust you.

I don't know, Duke.

I don't know, maybe we could institute some ground rules.

I don't know, until...

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't like to use this phrase,

I don't think so, pets.

I don't wanna talk about it.

I feel heroic and handsome!

I got big plans. I'm gonna sit here

I got out one night, chasing a butterfly or a car.

I guess everyone deserves a second chance,

I guess, what I'm tryning to say is...

I had a dime for every owner I kill.

I had a great thing going, but...

I had it go and mess it up.

I heard him screaming after he disappeared into those bushes!

I ju... I can't... Aww!

I just remember, I gotta be somewhere!

I just thought that if...

I just... Have you seen yourself?

I knew it!

I know this will take some getting used to, but...

I know, buddy. This is a lot to take in, but...

I know, maybe you didn't read the names, but...

I know, that's... Hey!

I like him.

I like this, bird.

I lived in a tattoo parlor.

I mean like, maybe one puppy asks his mom,

I mean, I was just thinking...

I mean, look at it. It's round, it fits in my mouth.

I mean, take me for instance.

I mean, this maybe the sausage talking...

I mean, yes. Human say they love us,

I mean, you're a tiny dog, okay? So, let's just go.

I mean, you're a tiny dog, okay? So, let's just go.

I miss her so much!

I miss her so much!

I only do the doggie paddle. And I don't know it well.

I start to feel little groggy.

I sure hope Max is safe.

I tried to stop him. But, he's crazy!

I will never eat a pill like that again,

I would not fetch that. I'm old school.

I, I can't go to the pound!

I... I don't go out anymore.

I... I... This is hopeless. I...

I... Uhh...

I'd like to know how much you heard.

I'd watch your tone, sunshine.

I'll be your best friend!

I'll miss you, Shelly.

I'll see you tonight.

I'll take that!

I'm comfy.

I'm done playing nice!

I'm gonna catch you into a string,

I'm good. I'm good.

I'm home Leonard.

I'm just gonna... It's no offense, but... Bye!

I'm Max.

I'm not talking about hipster real estate trends.

I'm on my way to the roof to look for, Max.

I'm selfish predator.

I'm sleeping on the floor, like a dog.

I'm so hungry.

I'm sorry that I yalled at you before.

I'm sorry!

I'm sure lucky I found you... Uh...

I'm talking about vengeance, Tattoo!

I've got a very busy day, too.

I've lived in this city all my life.

If he agrees to help us. Max is as good as found.

If my owner comes,

If we really trying on squeeze in there.

If you ever wanna...

If you let me out, I'll find your friend.

In a game that only I understand.

In this dark and forbidding shed.

Is gonna be over.

Is it a girl dog, or a boy dog?

Is it, Duke? Is it?

Is this supposed to scare me? I'm a cat.

Is this the second or the third floor?

Is this Viper poisonous?

It fits you. Let's admit that.

It is on!

It shouldn't came like this. Not on my watch.

It wasn't a random cat, it was you!

It worths a thousand souls. What's wrong?

It would please me to chew on a stick just now.

It's all just word. Really? Isn't it?

It's gonna be alright, Duke. It's okay.

It's gonna be me!

It's initiation time.

It's like a club but with biting and scratching.

It's like a club but with biting and scratching.

It's makin' a real comeback.

It's me and Katie.

It's no wonder I have no friends. Nobody.

It's one of things I love about him.

It's poo poo with a dash of caca.

It's the Po Po! Scram!

Jab! Jab! Jab! Body blow! Body blow!

Just ignore what just happend, okay?

Just like my brother is,

Kaite and me.

Katie and I...

Katie brought home a new dog from the pound!

Katie is gonna be so excited.

Katie is gonna be upset when she sees that.

Katie is not gonna like this.

Katie is... gonna flip out

Katie knows I wouldn't do anything like this!

Keep moving.

Know what I'm gonna do?

La pasión de la pasión.

Last we heard, he was lost in the sewers.

Later, Runty.

Lay down.

Let... Let's go.

Let's dow this now! Now! Now!

Let's go, Ripper. I'm bustin' you outta here.

Let's go.

Let's go. Let's go! Let's go!

Let's have a walk talk about why you think I'm stalling.

Let's move!

Librated forever! Domesticated never!

Light pop just now from my brain.

Like a dog, Duke. Relax, man.

Like rama lamma lamma ka dinga da dinga dong.

Like, that's you guys right here. And...

Listen, Duke. I'm not sure if you're aware,

Little lady, this is my city. I'll find your friend.

Loneliness.

Long live the revolution, suckers!

Look at all these sticks!

Look, fellas. This is not what it looks like.

Look, if you really want to get your turf back,

Look, look at me. I am your leader.

Look.

Looks like you could use a little help.

Looky what we apparently have here!

Lost, scared, so, so handsome.

Man, I feel sorry for them.

Man, we had fun!

Maria, if he's your true love.

Maria, your face!

Mate, look.

Max and Duke. Duke and Max.

Max is gone?

Max is missing! He's out there, somewhere.

Max, come on! I'm your friend, okay?

Max, did!

Max, did! He did it!

Max, grab the ring!

Max!

Max!

Max!

Max! Huh?

Max! Max!

Max! Max! Max!

Max! oh hoh! Max!

Max. This is, Duke.

Maybe he didn't like me.

Maybe that's what it's like for you,

Maybe the legend of dogs coming from wolves is just wrong.

Maybe there's a dog in the neighborhood that looks like Max.

Me see would like to have a look see.

Mommy! Can I have a bunny?

Morning, Max!

My old owner and I used to live arond here.

My owner went and left magic behind,

Myron, brows!

Myron, vacuum!

Na!

No, it is not.

No, no, no, no!

No, no, no!

No, no, no!

No, no, no. Snowball and I are the same side, now!

No, no, no. That.. That's not true.

No, no! Whoa!

No, no. Max. Okay.

No, they dig it.

No, we're good, thanks.

No, why do you think that?

No! Bad, bad bird!

No! We're not doing this squirrel thing, right now.

Nobody can help you!

Nobody likes you, squirrels!

Not good.

Not necessarily.

Not these two brothers.

Not us!

Nothing. I'm, I'm a cute little doggie.

Now, I have some big news.

Now, if we take the human road,

Now, is back to our primary mission!

Now, let's find Max before that rabbit does.

Now, sit!

Oh man, that's cool! It's such a small world.

Oh man, would you look at that sandwich!

Oh man, you remind me my boy, Ricky.

Oh man! You're making me angry.

Oh my God!

Oh my Gosh! Duke, found our lost ball.

Oh my Gosh! What happened to you?

Oh yes, Tiny Dog! We got your friend!

Oh, come on, guys. I can't believe you.

Oh, come on!

Oh, damn it.

Oh, don't. There is no need to cry.

Oh, Duke!

Oh, good for you, guys!

Oh, great! You're in love.

Oh, I had a fight, alright?

Oh, it's just, it's just one vase.

Oh, man. Don't get me started on people. Am I right, Duke?

Oh, no!

Oh, nuts!

Oh, please! Tell me it was a blender.

Oh, see? He likes you.

Oh, smells so good!

Oh, T.D. This kills me to say,

Oh, thank you.

Oh, that sounds exciting.

Oh, that was a pothole.

Oh, that's nobody, Gidget. He's just visiting.

Oh, wow! There are a ton of sticks over here, Max!

Oh, wow. You are a stubborn.

Oh, yeah!

Oh, yes!

Oh, yes. I'm so excited to see you too, buddy.

Oh, yes. Me like what me see.

Oh, you tried to eat me!

Oh, you're cold blooded.

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh! Ahh!

Oh! Get this.

Oh! Hey, Buddy.

Oh! huh! Whoo hoo!

Oh! I don't know if I like him.

Oh! I said it. By the way, I meant no offence.

Oh! No, no, but...

Oh! Okay, get the keys!

Oh! That's a shame.

Oh! You little cutie pie!

Oh! You're heading into a dangerous territory there, kitty cat!

Oh. Very nice.

Ohh!

Ohh!

Ohh! Never mind.

Ohh! You have no idea.

Oi, I ain't say nothing.

Okay, boy. Calm down. It's okay. Let's all be calm.

Okay, Bye bye.

Okay, get your umbrellas out, kitties.

Okay, he's too stupid to talk and too ugly to eat.

Okay, I'm just... You know what?

Okay, I'm running late. I gotta go.

Okay, okay. So...

Okay, please don't start now, Chloe.

Okay, sit.

Okay, sleep well.

Okay, thank you!

Okay, that's a good boy.

Okay, Well... Uh...

Okay! I'm coming! I'm coming!

Okay! Okay! Okay!

Okay?

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. Max?

Okay. So, how do I look?

Okay. This... This... This will be fine. We're fine.

Okay. Well, we use a spoon...

Ooh!

Ooh! Ouch!

Ooh! Thanks stranger.

Or shoes.

Or... Or not. I, I don't, I don't need a bowl.

Ouch!

Our love is stronger than words,

Our love is, how do I put this?

Our love is...

Over here!

Ow! The chain!

Owee! Guys! Who's that? What?

Paralysed.

Password?

Perfect. This is comfy, right?

Perfect. Wait till Katie finds out,

Pile of bones. Okay, well do.

Please take off the chain.

Pops knows everyone in this city.

Probably a butterfly, then.

Pssst!

Psst!

Put on the hood and pretend to be me.

Really?

Relax Snowball, I got you.

Remember me!

Remember that sausage factory? That was fun, huh?

Ricky was the only soldier I had...

Ricky! Rest in peace.

Right back at you, man!

Right, alpha dog. I can do that.

Right! Okay, I gotta go. Thank you! Thank you!

Right.

Ripper? Ripper, where you at?

Scent is getting stronger.

See you guys, later.

See you later, Chloe.

See you, Gino.

See, all of us have suffered at the hands of man.

See, that's Brooklyn.

Sha na na na na na yippity dip de doom.

She leaves!

She said, he's my brother. I don't want a brother.

Shhh you!

Shouldn't we be heading to the sewers?

Slashed two of their collars.

Sleep tight, boys.

Snake bite! Snake bite!

Snake bite! Snake bite!

Snake bite! Snake bite! Snake bite!

Snake bite! Snake bite! Snake bite!

Snake bite! Snake bite! Snake bite! Snake bite!

So long, Mel.

So technically, you might actually deserve this.

So, how'd it go? Great, right?

So, I just moved in that same day!

So, I pass out from fear.

So, I'll tell you what, if you find Max...

So, just let me do the talking.

So, maybe a few box.

So, that's how it's gonna be, huh?

So, that's... That who you're dealing with.

So, there's this... There's this thing in the kitchen.

So, what did my owner do?

So, where are you from, my fuzzy angel?

So, you and I are gonna have to take care of him.

So...

So...

Speak.

Spin. I'm doing spin.

Start hanging out with him,

Stay down!

Stop it! Look away!

Stop running, dummies! Stop it, right there!

Summon the Viper!

Sweet Pea.

Sweet!

Swim, tiny dog. Swim!

Take off my hood.

Tattoo!

Taxi!

Ten... Ah, okay.

Thanks, Max.

That are mere moments away from kicking in...

That ball of fluff's got a screw loose. Let's get at 'em.

That is just no excuse!

That rabbit. He has crazy eyes.

That raccoon is lying. He's not the president.

That was ready to kill humans on sight.

That's Katie.

That's my bowl.

That's not... No!

That's the funny thing about it.

That's the way it should be.

That's where we go get 'em dogs.

The bunny has an idea.

The downfall of the human race!

The identity of the random cat is not the point,

The leader does not decide the password.

The leader makes up the password, idiots!

The new password, is don't ask the leader for the password!

The squirrels are gonna take over the world!

The struggle could use some more muscle.

The thunder! And the lightning! Right down on your face.

The trainees used to practice on me.

There ain't no curing was wrong with that thing!

There he is!

There is no other ball in the city like this one ball.

There it is!

There they are!

There're lots of tiny dogs in the city!

There's just one little problem.

There's suitcases in the sky?

These guys are owner killers.

They get dogs instead of cats.

They say, everyone's going to Brooklyn these days.

They're beating up a dozens of animals on the Brooklyn bridge.

They're going to Brooklyn.

This is a groundbreaking evil behavior, people.

This is also great. We love it here.

This is bad. This is so bad.

This is exactly that what she lost.

This is it for you!

This is my friend, Tiberius. He's going to help us.

This is my lawn!

This is my least favorite party this holding so far.

This is not your area! We marked that tree!

This is Pops place.

This is Puffball, Squashface, Wiener Dog,

This place is so great.

This time I'll help you, I promise.

This time, really don't go.

This whole meeting me thing.

Throw it with your arm, you lazy weirdo.

Tiberius, this is gonna sound completely horrible, but um...

Tiny dog is gonna fo first. Everybody, T.D is going first.

Tiny Dog!

Tiny Dog?

Two, four, six, eight. Mmmm.

Ugh! The smell is disgusting... ly good!

Uh huh!

Uh huh.

Uh huh.

Uh oh!

Uh oh!

Uh!

Uh. What a waste of time.

Uh... I... I...

Uh... Isn't home that way?

Uh... What's going on? What's she doing?

Uh... Yeah. Hey, here's the thing, tho.

Uhh, excuse me, genius. You forgot my leash.

Uhh!

Uhh!

Uhh! Seriously?

Uhh. Fellas, that was an accident

Uhh... Nobody says that.

Um, this did not happend.

Um... Mr. Pops. Sir...

Um... See you later.

Unless it's covered in peanut butter.

Until they ran outta space!

Us against the world.

Viper, you in a better place. You and Ricky.