Goosebumps (2015) Edit

A good treatment center for your son.

A lot of men wearing that hat.

A night in with his aunt, BeDazzling.

A talking... Don't say it.

A ventriloquist dummy with a serious Napoleonic complex.

Aah!

Aah! Oh!

About rainbows and unicorns?

Absolutely right. Really?

After my dad died, I shut everyone out too.

Again, I'm so sorry.

Again. The end.

All of you in the car, now!

All of your children are coming out to play.

All right? At least not today.

All right? Can you do that? I can do that. Okay.

All right? You're fine.

All right.

All right. Everyone, everyone, everyone calm down. Okay?

All right. I'll keep that in mind, scaredy cat.

All right. Kit coming through. And don't worry.

All right. Okay, Lorraine. You got this.

All right. Trying not to spill.

All the monsters.

ALL: Whoa!

Always? No, that's a strong word.

And a two time world debate champion.

And all the kids that made fun of me.

And all the kids threw rocks at my window

And also right over there.

And as a final reminder, just be safe and have fun.

And bringing your delightful son and the police.

And called me names.

And definitely don't come in my room.

And everyone who gets to see you wearing it.

And I can't get any service.

And I couldn't do it without you.

And I don't know, you should come and invite a friend.

And I haven't heard a thing. No, no, he's lying.

And I hope that you show her

And I said, "Can we please move to Madison, Delaware?"

And I've sold way more books than him,

And in here.

And in there.

And intense. And a little tense.

And it doesn't have to...

And it just crawled out of a book.

And it's eating everybody's cars!

And keep the man eating plant away from the bug eyed aliens.

And not only are there no girls,

And right here...

And she's been staying with me for a while

And tell them to meet us at the high school.

And that everyone's in trouble.

And that's not gonna change.

And the monsters were swallowed

And the truth is, I'm afraid of being alone.

And then go split off with different girls.

And then one day, they actually...

And they became real to me.

And they could be coming for us any second,

And this door locking thing...

And we both ordered the chicken teriyaki,

And we won't have a problem.

And we'll be out of your hair. Here it is...

And we'll find your owner. [WHIMPERS]

And we've been cut off from the rest of the world.

And you're not gonna... Open the book, Zach.

Apologies, sir. Thank you for your time.

Are you kidding? We need a tank.

Are you my wingman, or am I yours?

Are you okay?

Are you okay? Yeah.

Are you okay? Yeah.

Are you okay? Yeah.

Are you okay? Yeah. Yeah. Thanks.

Are you sure you know where you're going?

Are you taking me somewhere to kill me? I'm just curious.

As long as the books remain locked, we're safe.

As long as we get rid of Stine.

Aw, shucks. You're giving me...

Aw, what, you were looking for me?

Awesome.

Back in the '92 Olympics. STINE: Really?

Back into the book,

Back into the world of paper and ink.

Bad idea. Bad idea. Get off that thing.

Became real.

Because Mr. Boyd is still recuperating from injuries

Because that doesn't sell

Because we're not a normal family. Now go get your things.

Being a what... A what a phile?

Being pushed on a swing and thinking,

BOTH: Aww!

BOTH: Whoa!

BOY: Hey, Becca. BECCA: Oh, hey.

BOY: Hey. Watch it.

Brains. Aah!

Brilliant. Really good idea. He's a keeper.

BROOKS: Oh.

BROOKS: Really sorry. I mean, obviously, you're not doing anything...

But I can't reach the brake.

But I felt like there was something there.

But it offered refuge from the real terrors

But let's keep moving while you argue.

But monsters have invaded Madison.

But nobody ever talks about that!

But she'll always be in here...

But she's locked in this house, and her dad's a psychopath.

But she's never talked to me before,

But that's the problem with kids today. They don't listen.

But we need to buy him time to write.

But we're just... We're not there yet.

But when they open,

But yeah, yeah, that works too. [LAUGHS]

But you get the idea.

But you get the idea.

But you know what? I'm just gonna call him.

Calling all cops, calling all the cops.

Can be broken down into three distinct parts.

Can I ask you something really serious, Hannah?

Can I ask you something? Of course.

Can you type any faster? This is my first time

Champ, get down. I have something to say.

CHAMP: Drop the book and let it suck itself back in.

CHAMP: I'm so confused.

CHAMP: My dad won a bronze

CHAMP: My mom, she was an all American sprinter

CHAMP: Oh, God, this is a bad idea.

CHAMP: Right.

CHAMP: Stop driving straight!

CHAMP: Wait, guys. Why don't we just sit at one of these tables?

CHAMP: Wait. What are you waiting for?

CHAMP: We're all gonna die!

CHAMP: What are you gonna do to us?

CHAMP: Why'd it have to be bear traps?

Charge!

Close it. Close it.

Cold was the night.

Come on, come on, come on.

Come on, come on.

Come on, come on.

Come on, go!

Come on, guys. We don't have a lot of time.

Come on, let's go.

Come on, open the book.

Come on, open the book.

Come on, quickly. Quickly. Yes.

Come on, scaredy cat. We're almost there.

Come on, this is my favorite part.

Come on, you're better than that.

Come on.

Come on.

Come on. Come on, work.

Come on. How many display cases could there be?

Come on. It's distracted.

Come on. We gotta go. Get up. Get up.

Come on. ZACH: Good idea. Punch it.

Come over to my house. I got it on LaserDisc.

Come with me.

Come with me.

Cool. Mom, I'm the new kid,

Dad, please calm down. [OBJECT SHATTERS]

Dad, they were only trying to help.

Dad, wait. There's no time. Start packing.

DAD: Dad can get one drop.

Dad!

Dance together or anything. Although that could work.

Detroit?

Did I scare you?

Did you hear that?

Do you hear that?

Do you miss her?

Do you see the fence?

Do you see the scratches on that wall?

Does it matter? Let's go.

Does she have a friend?

Does someone else wanna drive? I'll pull over right now.

Don't be clumsy, Lorraine.

Don't judge me.

Don't let it get the book!

Don't take it personally. He doesn't really like anyone.

Dropped calls are gonna be the least of this town's problems.

Dude, my dry cleaning bill's gonna be ridiculous.

Dude, no. This is a new suit. Get off.

Dude, this way. Come on. Come on.

Dude, we should call the cops.

Dude. Dude, get off me.

Duh.

Dummy. You said it.

Every story ever told

Everyone okay?

Exactly.

Fair enough.

Find anything you can to barricade the doors,

Find our seats quickly.

Finish it, Zach.

Flamethrower. Quiet.

Follow the scent.

For filing a false police report?

GALE: I remember that day.

GALE: You love it.

Gale.

Get back.

Get back. Get back.

Get in here with a hug! Hey. Oh.

Get your blankie, you go nap nap.

Ghouls. Go, go.

GIRL 2: Oh, okay. That would be great.

GIRL: Smooth.

GIRL: Yeah, yeah.

GNOME 1: Ooh.

GNOME 2: Ready, set, go.

GNOMES [IN UNISON]: Heave ho. Heave ho.

GNOMES: Heave ho. Heave ho.

GNOMES: Woo hoo! [SNOWMAN ROARING]

Go home, Zach. You're in over your head.

Go on without me. Save yourself. Okay. Good luck.

Go, go, go!

Go. Here. Go. Go. Come on. Come on. Go, go, go.

God, relax. The high school's just past the woods.

God. All night with this.

Good morning.

Good night.

Good talk.

Goosebumps.

Guantanamo Bay?

Guys, come on, let's go! Come on. Come on.

Guys, come on. Hurry!

Guys, false alarm. It's not my dad.

Guys, it's the truth. Okay?

Ha! Let's see him get through that.

Hands where I can see them. Officers!

Handsome and then back to ugly.

Hannah doesn't know, does she? She doesn't know what?

Hannah, come on. Let's go. HANNAH: No, what are you doing?

Hannah, he's gonna be okay, all right?

Hannah, there's something that you need to know,

Hannah, what are you doing?

Hannah, you grab A to M, I'll get M to Z.

HANNAH: But I don't wanna leave. I like it here.

HANNAH: But I don't wanna leave. I like it here.

HANNAH: Come on.

HANNAH: Dad!

HANNAH: Dad... Aah!

HANNAH: Everyone in town's been frozen.

HANNAH: I don't have to understand anything.

HANNAH: I gotta go.

HANNAH: No. How do you normally get down?

HANNAH: Shut it. Shut it.

HANNAH: The snowman must've knocked Slappy's book down.

HANNAH: You're not gonna fall.

Hannah! Hannah!

Hannah! I'm sorry.

Hannah? What is happening? How did that pop out of a book?

Hannah.

Hannah. Hannah, wait.

Have you ever read one of your books?

Have you met the cops in this town?

He can smell my scent.

He can't be killed.

He didn't laugh at any of my jokes,

He found us. Quickly, follow me.

He lost his phone in, like, a fire.

He's burning the books. Why's he doing that?

He's catching up! Turn right! CHAMP: Step on it!

He's here, and he can fix this,

He's not going back on the shelf ever again.

He's not making this up.

He's putting up a wall.

He's telling the truth. It's...

He's telling you the truth. I'm Hannah. I live next door.

He's the new drama teacher.

He's with R.L. Stine.

Head to the high school. My nephew's in trouble.

Heave ho.

Hello, Mr. Stine. Hello, Mr. Black.

Hello?

Hello? Can anyone hear me?

Hello. Ahem.

Hello. R.L. Stine.

Hello. Uh, hi. Hello.

Help me. Help me. Get them off. Okay, okay.

Help me. Oh, no, no, no. Help, someone.

Hey, can I get a picture real quick?

Hey, Hannah.

Hey, Hannah. I'm...

Hey, hey, do you have a dollar I could borrow?

Hey, hey, what happens now?

Hey, how do you feel about quinoa for dinner?

Hey, Mom. Mom. Mom. Oh, hey, sweetie.

Hey, we should go together.

Hey, we're going to the semiformal later tonight,

Hey, where are we going? Don't worry. It'll be fun.

Hey, you know, if you're scared, I can hold your hand.

Hey. We should change that.

Hi, Chump.

Hi, everyone.

Hi, yes. Uh, I live on Monroe. Um...

Hi.

Hi. Hi, I'm Champ. Nice to meet you.

Hi. I don't think we've been properly introduced.

Hi. I'm so sorry. We haven't properly met.

Hi. Thanks for coming. Hi.

High five.

Hmm, simple. Just one, one story,

Hmm. But Slappy had other ideas.

Hold on tight!

Hold on, big guy. No, no!

Hold on, hold on. Mom, tell me you don't believe him.

Hold on. I'll save you.

Honey? You okay?

Hopefully, a change of scenery will help.

How are you doing?

How could... How could you lie to her?

How do you know this guy's going to leave?

How do you like it, Papa?

How far are we from the high school?

How long was the drive from New York?

How's he doing?

Hurry, quick, quick, quick.

Hurry, this way. Guys, come on. In here.

I already have carpal tunnel in both hands.

I am so happy to introduce you

I believe in you. Shut up!

I believe you.

I called him and pretended to be the cops.

I can see you.

I can write you out.

I can't decide which one I hate more:

I can't get ahold of your mother or the cops or anyone...

I can't get reception.

I can't type while walking. Then commit it to memory.

I come in peace. Unarmed.

I could've killed you.

I didn't know being an audiophile was a crime.

I don't expect you to understand.

I don't have to understand anything.

I don't know what I was thinking.

I don't know who that is.

I don't know. Not like I even care.

I don't really think about it much anymore.

I don't remember writing about a giant praying mantis.

I don't wanna leave Zach alone tonight.

I don't want this day to end.

I gotta tell you something. Get down.

I had such low mileage on it.

I hate the suburbs.

I have a deadline, literally.

I have a huge test on Monday that I gotta study for.

I have an idea.

I have to chaperone the dance at the high school.

I just dropped it. And I'll put it back where it belongs

I just have a knack for it, I guess.

I just said that to get you over here.

I just wanna read you a bedtime story.

I knew it.

I know it was this way. It might've been the other way.

I know that they'll follow me and you'll all be safe.

I know when you're lying to me, Papa.

I know you. I created you.

I know, but why are these books locked?

I know... I know what to do, but I can't do it by myself.

I like that moxie, but we're gonna hold off.

I may have written one more book.

I mean, I did mean to scare you, but in a playful way.

I mean, who would lock a book?

I need your help.

I only opened one book, and now I see that was a mistake.

I promise. All right?

I really did look like baby Gollum.

I really don't care what she looks like.

I repeat, retreat in an orderly fashion to the storage room.

I rub myself in cilantro every morning.

I said get me out of here. Gotta go. There's no time.

I said get me out... Oh, no. Keep going. He's chasing us.

I stopped visiting after reading this.

I suffered from terrible allergies that kept me indoors.

I think I killed that bear.

I think it's time I started

I thought you were chained up, possibly.

I told you to stay away from us, or something bad would happen.

I was almost finished. Only one or two pages left.

I was born with the gift of fear. I remember being 4,

I was just gonna say "hug me again,"

I was so angry at the real world

I was so worried. I couldn't get hold of you or Lorraine.

I was thinking about flying solo too.

I was trying to protect her!

I was your best friend, and you turned your back on me.

I wrote her in such a way that she thinks she's real,

I... I'm kidding. I don't even know what twerking is.

I'll always be in your imagination,

I'll just be the lookout, you know, in here.

I'll kill him. Where is that little imbecile?

I'm afraid of losing her.

I'm allergic to dust mites.

I'm being ridiculous.

I'm coming with you. No, I need to do this alone.

I'm driving myself crazy!

I'm Gale Cooper, your new neighbor.

I'm going to destroy Madison, and I...

I'm going to work. Gonna do some educating.

I'm gonna go get a head start decorating my room.

I'm just sad we never got to share a dance.

I'm just saying, I have allergies too.

I'm not sure. I... I'm not... I don't know.

I'm okay.

I'm okay. I'm okay.

I'm playing it by ear.

I'm probably gonna take out the trash

I'm so over this.

I'm so sorry.

I'm sorry, a cemetery?

I'm sorry, I have to get hold of my son,

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you.

I'm sorry. I just wanted a photo real quick for my Instagram.

I'm sorry. I mean, shut up.

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Are you okay?

I'm sorry. It's just, um...

I'm staying because I love you. Aw, I love you too.

I'm still okay!

I'm stuck.

I'm stuck. Help me get out.

I'm your wingman."

I'm Zach, by the way. I'm Hannah.

I'm... I'm not afraid.

I've been saving this monster just for you.

I've never been so happy.

If Shivers comes back, you just give me a sign like:

If we're alive tomorrow.

If... If you wrote the monsters off the page,

Immediately.

In the morning, this will all just feel like a bad dream.

INVISIBLE BOY: You forgot about me.

Invite the rest of our friends to the party.

Is anyone in here?

Is coming from this bookcase.

Is Hannah okay? There was no scream.

Is he handsome? Is he single?

Is he thinking about leaving his wife and needs a push?

Is it actually tasted kind of fine.

Is it bad? Uh, yeah. It's really bad.

Is someone there?

Is that what you're wearing to the dance?

It came out of nowhere.

It doesn't work like that. [EXPLOSION]

It has a soul of its own.

It has all my contact info.

It was actually a werewolf. What?

It's a beautiful home you have.

It's a domestic disturbance.

It's actually a written warning.

It's all right. All right?

It's also a gift for me

It's bigger than our apartment.

It's candy.

It's caught on your jacket.

It's coming from that room.

It's cool, right?

It's fine.

It's gonna be all about Zach tonight.

It's how I stay in such great shape.

It's just been me and my mom

It's like mint and BO. It works.

It's like stop trying to be Stephen King, man.

It's like, whatever. I should listen to my psychic.

It's limited edition, so you're not gonna see

It's locked. I picked it.

It's locked. STINE: This way.

It's Lorraine.

It's Lorraine.

It's my fault, not this town's. Not yours.

It's no joke, man.

It's not a nickname.

It's not like he's gonna go ugly,

It's not what I was expecting.

It's okay, Mom. Let's go in together.

It's Slappy's revenge.

It's so limited edition.

It's somewhere safe.

It's still very impressive. Shut up.

It's talking. What is that thing?

It's The Blob That Ate Everyone. Don't let it touch you.

It's the Boogeyman. And he's picking his nose.

It's time for me to face my demons.

It's what's happening right now. You can do this. End it.

It's your sister.

Joined forces to defeat Slappy and his monsters."

Just come on.

Just give me a 60 second head start

Just give me a sec. It's...

Just give me one bar.

Just go!

Just making sure.

Just one. One story to capture them all.

Just tell the cops to head to the high school

Just wait.

Just... Just me and my mom.

Kids' books help you fall asleep.

Knock it off my bucket list.

Lead me to Stine.

Legally, I can't live on my own until I'm 18.

Lemonade, g**** or strawberry?

Let me explain something to you, Zacharias.

Let me tell you something about Steve King.

Let's get back to why... Look out!

Let's get silly.

Let's go outside where it's safe.

Let's go.

Let's go.

Let's go. Follow me.

Like where?

Like where?

Listen to me, if I can lure them away in one of those buses,

Listen to my best friend Zach.

Locked me up, imprisoned me in the pages of a book.

Look at this kitchen.

Look at you! [LAUGHS]

Look out!

Look, I read what it did to Pasadena.

Look. A yard.

Looking for vice principals?

LORRAINE: Oh, Mr. Shivers?

Lorraine. Lorraine.

MALE VOICE: Hello, Papa.

MAN [ON SCREEN]: All right, Zach. Let's see what you got.

MAN [WHISPERING]: Hannah.

MAN 1: That what they call dancing now?

MAN 2: I'm not sure. Zach.

Maybe if I hold on to you tight enough...

Maybe there's like a key or something

Miss Cooper.

Mm hm, mm hm.

Mm hm.

Mm. And you look good with it on.

Mom, are you positive there weren't any other places

Mom, Hannah's in trouble.

Mom.

Monsters, demons, ghouls to terrorize my neighborhood

My dad's gonna kill me.

My full name is Champion.

My God, what is that?

My grandma lives in Pasadena.

My hero.

My name is Mr. R. L. Stine,

My real name is Champ, you know.

Mystery solved.

Neither is Stine!

Never to be seen...

Nice.

No way.

No, I can't explain. I have to go.

No, I didn't mean it, Champion!

No, I'm not close enough.

No, it's fair. You're bringing up good points,

No, it's not working. I have to hide.

No, no, by definition you have to be somewhere out, looking.

No, no, no, no, no, no. Don't be silly.

No, no, no. I can't explain it.

No, no, no. I need my typewriter.

No, no, no. It doesn't work

No, no. I just... I just observed...

No, not now, I don't, but...

No, please.

No, worldwide.

No, YouTube. Oh.

No!

No! Don't open it!

No.

No. I can just tell

No. I'm serious.

No. No.

No. No. Come on. Come on.

No. Not until you explain what's going on.

No. The danger's past.

No. Wait, wait...

No. Yeah.

North Korea? No.

Not a day goes by that I don't think of her.

Not always. Usually.

Not friendly. Definitely not friendly.

Not just some figment of your imagination.

Not so fun, is it?

Not so much for Stine as it was for the others.

Not sure walking in with the vice principal is the play.

Not too far.

Not yet.

Nothing.

Now go.

Now I'm worried he's dead.

Now it just sits here.

Now open the book, scaredy cat.

Now, freeze.

Now, this is a real homecoming.

Now...

Of an upstanding citizen such as yourself.

Of course I missed you.

Of course you do, my sexy little salsa.

Of high end audio equipment.

Oh, and no tags.

Oh, be careful, Zach.

Oh, bear traps.

Oh, boy. Bad idea. Sorry.

Oh, by your dad?

Oh, did you wanna exchange numbers?

Oh, God.

Oh, God. He's gone.

Oh, he is such a crack up.

Oh, honey. Leave the hat on. I don't want you to burn.

Oh, I almost forgot.

Oh, is that all? Let me see.

Oh, it's been hard.

Oh, my God. How'd you do that?

Oh, my God. Oh, my God, Dad. Dad, what happened to...?

Oh, my goodness.

Oh, my gosh.

Oh, my gosh. He gets more handsome every time I see him.

Oh, my sweet darling, I've missed you so much. Mwah.

Oh, no, she didn't.

Oh, no. Not him.

Oh, no. This... No.

Oh, no. This... No.

Oh, officers. I'm so sorry.

Oh, okay. Yeah. See you.

Oh, Papa.

Oh, so you think he's playing hard to get?

Oh, thank God he's gone.

Oh, thanks. I hate fighting with him.

Oh, um...

Oh, what did I have for you?

Oh, what's the word?

Oh, who's Hannah?

Oh, yeah? Well, good job with that.

Oh, yeah. Cool, cool.

Oh, yeah. Here you go. Thank you.

Oh, yeah. You lived in New York.

Oh, yes. Look at that. I mean, come on. That is it.

Oh, Zach. That's so sweet.

Oh! Is that your scream?

Oh! My man!

Oh! Nope. Wrong door.

Oh! Teenagers.

Oh.

Oh. Oh, thank God.

Oh. Oh. Went too far. Got it.

Oh...

Okay, both of you need to go right now.

Okay, cool. Okay.

Okay, if it really matters that much, look at this. All right?

Okay, it was clear there was only one place left to hide.

Okay, just so we're clear,

Okay, look...

Okay, stay here and watch the driveway.

Okay, then we gotta get you to a computer

Okay, um...

Okay, yeah. Oh, my goodness!

Okay, yes. Hannah's my daughter,

Okay, you must be so thirsty.

Okay? It's gonna be okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. "R.L. Stine."

Okay. [TYPING]

Okay. Everybody, you gotta listen up...

Okay. I'm off to work.

Okay. Just a little further.

Okay. Just wait here.

Okay. Let's settle down. Um...

Okay. That was, in fact, the funhouse!

Okay. Then I'll open it. Wait, no. Hannah!

Okay. There is one thing that I like to do.

Okay. Uh, sorry. Excuse me. Let me just...

Okay. Way more books!

On Tuesdays and Thursdays.

Ooh, too hot.

Ooh. Check it out.

Or is it the other way around?

Or something very bad will happen.

Or the last scream you hear will be your own.

Or the more likely scenario:

Out the kitchen door. Go now.

Over here! Come on!

Over here.

Over here.

PAINTER: Yeah. One more coat, we should be good.

Please, no. Please.

Please, you're the scaredy cat.

Pleasure's mine. Thank you so much for stopping by

Power went out again.

PRINCIPAL [OVER PA]: School wide announcement:

PRINCIPAL: All right. Let's find our seats, ladies and gentlemen.

PRINCIPAL: Back to business. Let's go.

PRINCIPAL: Get that door! Get it! Get it!

PRINCIPAL: Hold that door down.

PRINCIPAL: Let's go, ladies and gentlemen.

PRINCIPAL: Oh, God.

PRINCIPAL: Three. Two, one.

Pull. Everybody pull.

Pulling the strings in this relationship.

Really? Ha!

ROBOTS: We come in peace.

Roll up the window.

Run!

Say hello to my gelatinous friend. Run!

See you in your dreams!

Sergeant Slappy, ready to protect and serve.

Settle down.

She flew back to London yesterday morning.

She says, "Stop dating losers, and never go on a plane."

She thinks she's a person, okay?

She went in there.

She's worse than the last one.

She's worse than the last one.

Shh! What? What?

SHIVERS: Hannah!

SHIVERS: Hm?

SHIVERS: Silence.

SHIVERS: You are never allowed to see that boy!

SHIVERS: You know why! HANNAH: That is not fair!

Shut it! Go!

Silver fillings. I have a ton of cavities.

Since my dad died last year, so yeah.

Sixty seconds start now,

Slappy, it's so nice to see you again.

Slappy, no, wait!

SLAPPY: And you never used it.

SLAPPY: Come close. Don't be shy.

SLAPPY: I can hear you.

Slappy?

Slappy?

Slappy? Hi.

Slappy.

Slappy's going to come for me.

Slappy's not happy!

Slappy's taken out the cell phone towers.

SLAPPYS [IN UNISON]: You stuck me on a shelf for years and years.

Sneaking off in the middle of the night with strange boys.

So good looking. Thank you, Aunt Lorraine.

So how did you get the nickname "Champ"?

So I created my own friends.

So I understand.

So I'm high off of the ground.

So I'm just gonna do that all night,

So is there anything, like, fun to do around here

So mature.

So there are no girls?