Wayne's World 2 (1993) Music Edit

A big star.

A concert?

A cruller, two Sugar Pucks,

A date?

A little.

A long time ago,

A lot of people have started to show up,

A raspberry...and a...drink?

A raspberryjelly donut, orange drink

A sphincter says what?

A Stanley Cup, a large coffee with cream,

A weird naked Indian.

A year has passed. I'm a little older. I'm a little wiser.

Abandon positions! Abandon positions! Whoa!

Abort! Abort! We have been identified!

About the upcoming Waynestock concert.

Actually, there are about 1 0,000

Aerosmith and Pearl Jam.

After the show, I have to fly back to Aurora.

Ah.

Ah. Wait a minute.

Alas, my young friend.

All right, Bobby. Let's just get it done, okay?

All right, man, all right.

All right, men. Our work here is done.

All right, okay. So, until next week, good night, and party on.

All right, then.

All right, we're on!

All right!

All right.

All right.

All right. Garth, to the Mirthmobile.

All right. Good call.

All right. Good information about Waynestock. Very exciting.

All right. Our special guests right now,

All right. So, here we are in our new surroundings,

All right. Well, if you see her, can you send her over to Waynestock?

All right. Well, that's all the time we have for this week.

All righty.

All rock, all the time.

All this talk about killing,

Also, I'd like to bring her out to LA, finish the album.

Although, I know you want to. We both know you want to.

Although, they didn't want to change at first.

An Old Fashioned.

An old man fashioning a kayak out of a log?

Ancient Chinese secret, huh?

And .45 Magnums with the clip filed down

And a box of Five Holes.

And all the trades worked out.

And because it's at Komrades, we're gonna call it a communist party.

And before I could say, No, this guy came to me in a dream.

And did a great show.

And did I mention that we will be seeing

And doing your homework right away,

And dropped me off at the park and ride.

And finally, the reason we're on early

And he came over here yesterday, and he was crazy, like an animal.

And here we are.

And I do mean anytime.

And I just think it's time that we should see other people.

And I said, Well, you appear to be more like a crooner

And I thought maybe you could play, too.

And I was looking for 1 ,000 brown M&Ms

And I'd also like to address a rumor.

And I'll fix us a little drink, okay?

And junk like that, you know, which is a real drag.

And just walk around.

And Marilyn.

And mentions there's a little

And mentions there's a little sweet shop on the edge of town.

And my dad, forget about it. Schwing! Schwing! Schwing! Schwing!

And now, Wayne, what can I do you for?

And on top of all that, Del's gone completely mental.

And she's signaling to us.

And so on, and so on,

And so on.

And that being an adult means

And that being an adult means

And that probably no one's gonna show up.

And that song is from your album that's coming out, right?

And that's here,

And that's it.

And The History of the Stanley Cup, 100 Years of Glory.

And the promise I made which

And the safety off...

And then I think I would like a large...with...eam.

And then you could have me anytime you want.

And there I am in Sri Lanka, formerly Ceylon, at 3:00 in the morning,

And they tell their friends,

And they tell two friends,

And though I am sure this information will be useless to you

And to put the city on the map.

And Wayne.

And we're out.

And when two cats can't groove to the same tune,

And your chief export is modular furniture.

And...peaker...oken.

Answers to what?

Any more questions?

Any questions?

Approval from the guilds and unions.

Are you all right?

Are you and Bobby having an affair?

Are you Del Preston?

Are you kidding? I'd give my right eye.

Are you ready?

Are you wearing Brut?

Ask me a question.

At Adlai Stevenson Memorial Park, in the playing fields.

At five on the short side of nine bells here,

At the First Presbyterian Church on Gordon Street.

Awesome party!

Back there, guys like that are 1 2 for 1 0 cents.

Back to position one. Over.

Back with you on WPIG, maximum grunt.

Backstage laminates.

Because it's just a chance for the city ofAurora...

Because they're fun.

Because you had to learn that it doesn't matter what you do,

Because you had to try and do something with your life.

Belt fed M60 Brownings.

Besides, Cassandra needs the encouragement.

Betty Jo, could we have the permits for a festival, please?

Bleak? What?

Bobby is taking me to LA to do the final mix on my album.

Bobby said my album will never, ever be on vinyl.

Bobby tells me you are very, very talented.

Bobby's my record producer.

Boldly go where no man has ever gone before.

Breaking into this little sweet shop, right?

But fortunately, White Supremacy World was canceled,

But I can't do the concert by myself. It takes two men to run the concert!

But I do now.

But I don't know anything about putting on a concert.

But I feel great, man!

But I love her! I'm freaking out!

But I require more in a son in law.

But I'm fine with it.

But I'm putting on a concert in Aurora, Illinois.

But I'm putting on a concert in Aurora, Illinois.

But if this record deal falls through,

But it was a failure.

But look,

But my divorce isn't final.

But none of the bands are here.

But since you have sacrificed your health

But someone visited me in a dream and told me that Del Preston

But sure enough, I got the M&Ms, and Ozzy went on stage

But that was a long time ago,

But that's no reason to wait till the last minute.

But the guys you put together were so hot.

But the shop owner and his son,

But they didn't want our 10:30 time slot.

But those days are gone forever.

But we came all the way from America just to talk to you.

But we were able to talk Plant World into changing with Cooking World.

But what I'd really like to do is something extraordinary,

But where are we supposed to meet Cassandra?

But you have nothing to worry about, Wayne.

But you will also get good.

But you woke me up.

But you wouldn't hear it,

But, you know, even though I live on my own now,

But...

Bye, Sammy.

Calgon?

Can I call you back? I am on the other line.

Can I have some cocoa later?

Can you believe they're not making vinyl anymore?

Cassandra loves you for who you are,

Cassandra!

Cassandra!

Cassandra? No, I haven't seen her.

Cassandra.

Cassandra...

Cha ching, cha ching.

Cha ching! Cha ching!

Check two!

Circulating in the crowd.

Come on in.

Come on in. Nice digs, huh?

Come on, let's go!

Come on, let's go!

Come on, let's go! Let's go!

Come on, let's go.

Come on.

Come on. Come on, Cassandra.

Come on. Come on. Come on.

Come on. Pixie dust.

Come on. Sit down.

Come with me.

Come, hold me.

Come.

Come.

Coming by, man. Excuse me! Excuse me.

Cool it, okay?

Cool.

Cool.

Cool.

Cool.

Cool. My Sports lllustrated swimsuit issue.

Cool. Yeah.

Cross the t's and dot the...

Damn. I missed the start of Wayne's show.

Dansome

Definitely. Scott! Scottie.

Definitely. She sounds great.

Del, look. For years I thought this was a Mercedes emblem.

Del, you're really gonna love Aurora.

Del?

Del?

Dick Van Dyke Show.

Did he have a naked Indian?

Did you get the tape?

Did you give any thought to what I said?

Didn't you think it was a trifle unnecessary

Do it, Miss Thing! Do it! Do it!

Do not bite any off and chew it.

Do we have to put up with this?

Do you have any Megadeth?

Do you know where she is? I have to talk to her. It's really important.

Do you think I'm a gulla bull

Does Princess Di still live here?

Dogs. Dogs.

Don't try and steal me pot o' gold.

Don't worry. I'll get rid of the boyfriend and the band.

Don't you hate schmoozing?

Don't you just love music?

Easy.

Eat me!

Educated men are rare.

Entertainment is fine, but this...

Everybody in the world has Frampton Comes Alive.

Everybody, can I get your attention? I'd like to say something.

Everybody, I'd like to say something!

Everybody's excited, huh?

Everybody's really hassling me to do something with my life, you know?

Ex squeeze me? A baking powder?

Ex squeeze me? Have I ever seen this one before?

Excellent Waynestock tickets still available.

Excellent!

Excellent.

Excellent.

Excellent.

Excellent. What was it like?

Excuse me, what are you guys doing here in the middle of the street?

Excuse me.

Excuse me. Coming through!

Excuse me. Excuse me.

Excuse me. Hey, Wayne,

Excuse us. Excuse me.

Extreme close up!

Facing responsibility, yet still taking the time to have fun.

Feel naughty. Feel naughty.

Finally. It took, like, two hours.

Fine, then all forms and applications must be filled out in triplicate

Follow the weird naked Indian.

For I am no longer a stranger in the ways of the woman.

For knowledge of my home country,

Four copies.

Frampton Comes Alive?

Frank, it's Bobby.

From Knuergen near the Bjorgen Fjords.

Fun.

Game on!

Garth is distracted by chicks,

Garth, I'm starting to get a bad feeling, man.

Garth, I'm the leprechaun!

Garth, it's a sign.

Garth, it's Heather Locklear.

Garth, it's locked!

Garth, it's us. No one's gonna hassle us.

Garth, this is big. We gotta get back to the playing fields.

Garth! Somebody just grabbed my butt!

Garth.

Get dressed.

Get it, girl! Get it, girl!

Get me my cigarettes, would you, lover?

Get that microphone! Get that microphone!

Get the flashlight.

Give me a week?

Give them a few minutes. They're working on it.

Go get Cassandra. Del and I will run the concert.

Go, now!

Go!

Go! Go! Go!

Go! Not on the ground!

Goat is here.

God, Handsome Dan is so cool. He must get a million chicks.

Good call, Garth.

Good call. There's no animals or clowns.

Good for you.

Good morning, darling.

Good night.

Good tunes. Good brew. Good buddies.

Good work, my friend.

Good work, my friend.

Gordon Street?

Got the money?

Great. Good stuff.

Hang about.

He can really wail.

He can't walk the streets without getting mobbed.

He could ruin a Led Zeppelin reunion concert. You know what I mean?

He goes by the name of Bobby.

He has money.

He has offered security, a career and a green card.

He received his Sports lllustrated football phone.

He shoots, he scores!

He told me that the purpose of my life was to put on a concert.

He was with us in the good times and the bad.

He will help you.

He's a good man.

He's been working with me and the band.

He's gotten a lot better, don't you think?

He's the greatest roadie that ever lived.

He's wheeling, he's dealing.

Heather be thy name.

Hello, is anybody here?

Hello?

Hello?

Hello? Can we talk later?

Hello.

Hello.

Hello. Hello. Yes?

Hello. My name is Wayne Campbell. You don't know me.

Hello. Yes?

Her career's really taking off.

Here we are at Piccadilly Circus.

Here, let me get the gate for you. Hold on.

Here. Let me look at it.

Hey, a lot of people's girlfriends are in there.

Hey, a lot of people's girlfriends are in there.

Hey, are you those two guys who have that TV show in Aurora?

Hey, Campbell!

Hey, Cassandra,

Hey, Cassandra, you look hot.

Hey, don't cry.

Hey, Handsome Dan coming at you

Hey, how do I get back?

Hey, how's it going?

Hey, huh?

Hey, I'm looking for Cassandra.

Hey, I'm so glad you could make it.

Hey, in a minute l'm gonna be joined by Wayne and Garth.

Hey, in a minute l'm gonna be joined by Wayne and Garth.

Hey, Jim, what if nobody shows up?

Hey, no guff, Chet.

Hey, Sammy, wait up.

Hey, thanks a lot. We'll see you inside.

Hey, there goes Garth and his friend Wayne, the psychopath.

Hey, Wayne, Garth,

Hey, we don't wanna end the movie like this.

Hey, what's going on?

Hey, what's going on?

Hey, where are you going?

Hey.

Hey.

Hi, Bobby.

Hi, Handsome Dan. It's great to meet you.

Hi!

Hi! Where are you from? I'm from Wilmette.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi. We're here to see Handsome Dan.

Hold on a second, Moe.

Hold on.

Hold tight.

Hooray for Hollywood.

How about all the other products here? How much for those?

How am I gonna get the bands to come?

How are you? You must be Wayne Campbell.

How can I help you?

How can you sleep like that?

How do you get my clothes so white and fresh smelling?

How long does it take for you to get here from Aurora?

How'd you get this number?

Huh?

Huh?

Huh? Guys, huh?

I almost remembered something else then, but it's gone.

I am Bjergen Kjergen.

I arranged the match myself.

I believe this knife is yours.

I bet he's totally studly and buffed.

I broke up with my girlfriend,

I can go to a movie on a school night, like that.

I cannot find your daughter, and I'm greatly troubled.

I could've stayed in Hong Kong.

I did a project on Sweden in the eighth grade.

I don't do concerts anymore.

I don't do that anymore.

I don't know about this, Wayne.

I don't know if you should mention that Jim Morrison thing anymore.

I don't know where she is either.

I don't know, man.

I don't know, man. Jim Morrison said, If you book them, they will come.

I don't know, Wayne. It doesn't look too good.

I don't recall ever seeing you in here.

I don't think so. We took a left turn at the gate,

I don't want to see other people.

I feel great, man.

I feel great!

I feel like I'm in a John Hughes rite de passage movie.

I feel like I'm turning into Sasquatch.

I feel like I've been placed in the delete bin of life

I feel sorry for guys who still have to live with their parents, you know?

I feel sorry for guys who still have to live with their parents, you know?

I feel weird.

I got myself into this. I'm gonna get myself out of it.

I gotta split, man. I got some cats I gotta hang with.

I guess Jim was wrong.

I guess they sent it to the wrong house.

I had the same dream.

I had to beat them to death with their own shoes.

I had to beat them to death with their own shoes.

I had to tell Cassandra something.

I hate my father. I hate my life.

I have chosen another for my daughter.

I have got to get you to LA.

I have no idea what you're talking about, Wayne.

I have perfect 20/20 vision with both eyes.

I have to ask you...

I have to get in there.

I have to go find Cassandra and tell her how I feel.

I have to go to LA for a couple of days.

I have to go.

I hear you're putting on some kind of concert.

I just had the most vivid and powerful dream of my life.

I just love a man with a sense of humor.

I just wanna remind everybody that there's still plenty of tickets left.

I just wanted to know

I just wanted to know

I know all seven animal styles,

I know it's a small part, but I think we can do better than this.

I know where we are.

I know, and they're not gonna show up.

I know, man. This place is gonna be chick central.

I know. I mean, she said she'd play, and she never misses a gig.

I know. It's weird.

I learned it from Keith Richards when I toured with the Stones.

I like it here. All my friends are here.

I like them teeny and toasty.

I lose my visa, and then I have to go back to Hong Kong.

I love being with you.

I love the way those big, thick glasses magnify your pupils.

I mean, he had a completely different bag from Jack.

I mean, he just couldn't groove.

I mean, how are you gonna miss a half naked Indian, for God's sake?

I mean, I could say anything right now, like, You're a complete tool.

I mean, I know you love me, but I won't let you kill my husband.

I mean, I've got Waynestock,

I mean, it's not like the Grateful Dead are still together and touring, is it?

I mean, what do I know about music today?

I mean, you've heard, you've seen, you know.

I might be.

I need your help. Think! Where could Cassandra be?

I once knew a girl who lived on Gordon Street,

I once knew a girl who lived on Gordon Street,

I promised myself I wouldn't cry.

I really wish I hadn't told you that.

I said, A sphincter says what?

I said, I'm not familiar with your work.

I said, No way.

I said, Who are you? He said, Jim Morrison.

I see.

I spoke with the label today.

I still go out with my girlfriend Cassandra.

I still think you led a really cool life.

I think I had too much Jolt cola.

I think people are getting really cranked.

I think she took that well.

I think something's going on.

I think we should break up.

I think you underestimate them. They're really sharp.

I thought I saw a puddy cat. Whoa!

I trust you slept well.

I understand.

I want you to meet a friend of mine, Sammy Davis Jr.

I want you to meet somebody.

I want you to meet someone. Cassandra, this is Scott.

I was just saying the exact same thing.

I was on the mini tramp, and I got diarrhea.

I will always keep,

I will personally distribute cyanide capsules

I will take you, old man.

I wish I could climb up inside of that big old brain of yours

I wish to God that somebody would do something

I wish to God that somebody would do something

I won't. I won't.

I won't. I won't. I won't. I won't. I won't. I won't.

I would be honored.

I wouldn't commit just yet.

I'd probably just end up embarrassing you anyways.

I'd...ike...rullers...urger...ox, and a Mikita...cup.

I'll bet you like to be in control. Tell me.

I'll probably end up working at Great America,

I'm a dead rock star.

I'm a grownup now, you know.

I'm afraid you've been misinformed.

I'm always a little afraid to come in by myself.

I'm assuming, of course, you have the $5,000 occupancy permit,

I'm at this number.

I'm beside myself with joy.

I'm blind.

I'm dancing.

I'm ecstatic.

I'm from Cicero. Isn't it cool to be downtown?

I'm going to hurl.

I'm gonna be frank.

I'm gonna go pick a fight.

I'm having fun.

I'm Honey Hornée.

I'm Jim Morrison.

I'm just an old geezer.

I'm just so...

I'm kind of busy now.

I'm low on gas and you need a jacket.

I'm nice to him because he's my producer.

I'm not Handsome Dan.

I'm not mental or anything,

I'm nothing like your old boyfriend.

I'm pretty good with maps.

I'm so psyched for this concert, man. Aerosmith's gonna kick ass!

I'm sorry, man.

I'm sorry.

I'm starting to get hair in really weird places, man.

I'm what you call sans parents.

I'm with someone. I'm sorry I couldn't help.

I'm working with them. I'm still in this studio in Aurora.

I've never been on The Tonight Show before.

Ice Capades, Tiny Toons, Kenny G.

If I hear anything, I'll let you know.

If I wanted a guy that was all drive and ambition,

If we're gonna go down, let's at least go down in glory.

If you book them, they will come.

If you lived in the suburbs, you were issued it.

If you need anything,

If you needed anything from the Permit Office.

If you're anything like my old boyfriend.

In here!

In the event of capture,

Is because we're going to a concert tonight in Chicago.

Is that it?

Is that not right, Mr. Scream?

Is there something wrong with that weird eye?

Is this Aerosmith's tour manager?

Isn't that great? You heard of it?

Isn't that terrific?

Isn't that true, sphincter boy?

It came in the mail with samples of Tide.

It came in the mail with samples of Tide.

It is!

It takes me 40 minutes door to door.

It takes two people to run a concert,

It was about 3:00 in the morning,

It was nice meeting you.

It was really hard. I stayed up all night working on it.

It was sent to the wrong house.

It was written on the back of a business card.

It will arrive tomorrow, along with the swimsuit issue and the video,

It will not be easy.

It's a garage band.

It's a little rustic, a little bucolic, but, oh, well, I like it. It's cute.

It's a lot of work.

It's all a creature.

It's an age old Cantonese family method that very few people know about.

It's called...

It's embarrassing. No offense or nothing.

It's getting a little out of hand. I think you'd better say something.

It's just gonna be a big party, you know.

It's just that things have started to look a little bleak.

It's like 1 ,000 fingers urging you to let go.

It's my eye, isn't it?

It's my husband.

It's not even challenging anymore. It's like shooting fish in a barrel.

It's nothing. Just something she has to do.

It's okay. She's marrying Bobby.

It's...

J. Edgar Hoover was one bad cat.

Ja, I know.

Ja.

Jeff, Wayne.

Jesus! God, no.

Jesus! It's crazy!

Jim Morrison and his weird naked Indian friend

Jim, none of the bands have showed up.

Jim, why was I supposed to put on this concert?

Jim!

Jim!

Jim?

Jim's job is to make sure we always have plenty of watermelons.

Joe, you know the price, $29.95.

Just 1 5 to 20 minutes,

Just a moment. I've got call waiting.

Just go get Cassandra and be back before we start!

Just like the chickens.

Keep it down.

Keep the faith, my friend.

Keep the faith, my friend.

Keep the faith, my friend.

Keith cannot be killed by conventional weapons.

Kenny G?

Knuergen, near the Bjorgen Fjords.

Knuergen.

L can't believe Paramount is spending the money to fly us to England.

L would have thought they would just use two doubles.

L'm the leprechaun.

Ladies and gentlemen!

Last night I had a dream.

Last night, Jim Morrison spoke to me.

Let me bring you up to speed. Come on.

Let me get my headset off, I'll be right out.

Let's all look at your...

Let's do the Thelma & Louise ending. Yeah!

Let's get some lunch.

Let's go to Buckingham Palace.

Let's go.

Let's go.

Let's just keep going, Wayne.

Lf you book them, they will come.

Like Aerosmith.

Like Eric Clapton and the Rolling Stones.

Like Knebworth, in England,

Listen to them. They loved you. Me, too.

Listen, Bobby's put together some great musicians.

Listen, it was fun,

Listen, Jim, I'm really confused, okay?

Listen, sonny, Jim,

Listen.

Living on your own definitely has its perks. Schwing!

Look at this old one. Gerry and the Pacemakers.

Look at this old one. Gerry and the Pacemakers.

Look, if Wayne says we're not, we're not, okay?

Looking for 1 ,000 brown M&Ms to fill a brandy glass,

Lower case j's.

Lt kind of reminds me of that movie, the Leprechaun. You remember.

Lt's gonna be a big party.

Lt's kind of a fund raiser for Waynestock.

Lt's Wayne's World, Wayne's World

Lt's Wayne's World, Wayne's World

Marilyn...

Maybe we ought to overdub a track with Bobby playing.

Maybe we should've called Cassandra before we dropped by.

Maybe we'll see each other around.

Maybe where you shop.

Me

Me, my old lady and the road.

Milton, you are the liaison

Miss Hornée.

Moe? Yeah.

Mopping up hurl and lung butter.

Most guys are jerks.

Most people just take them and never come back.

Mr. Campbell, you're serious about putting on a rock concert?

My girlfriend is in there.

My girlfriend's in there.

My little sister tried to borrow my Def Leppard record.

My ma gave me a dollar

My name is Wayne Campbell.

My old lady put that together.

My Sports lllustrated football phone.

My woman likes me in cologne.

Name the one you have chosen, and surely he will die by my hand.

Nasty business, really.

Naturally, you'll need the necessary application for authorization,

Nervous?

Next to Mahogany Rush.

Nice to meet you, Miss Horny.

Nice to meet you, too, man.

No later than 1 0 working days before the event,

No way.

No, ask me a question about your life.

No, I like the way I said it better.

No, no, no, man. We're over here.

No, no, no. You guys go and have fun.

No, no, sir. We just gotta make sure

No, of course not.

No, of course not. Where did you hear that?

No, you're not.

No!

No! No! Don't say it.

No. Honestly, Campbell, I am not having an affair.

None of the bands have showed up, Wayne.

Not a day passes that I don't think of her,

Not bad for a little girl from Hong Kong.

Not on the ground.

Not to mess with the military industrial complex.

Not!

Nothing to worry about. After the show, I thought we...

Notjust a place, but a state of mind.

Now correct me if I'm wrong.

Now, if you'll excuse me,

Now, move it, people!

Now, that's exactly what I'm talking about.

Now, these babies tend to heat up, so shoot in three second bursts.

Now, who are you looking at? Let's see. Let's see the guy.

Now, who's... Now, who's we?

Of course, I don't have to tell you how extremely talented Cassandra is.

Oh, Bobby says.

Oh, damn, these high heels. Oh!

Oh, darling. I meant to tell you,

Oh, darling...

Oh, dear. Last guy didn't get.

Oh, denied!

Oh, Garth, I'm so scared.

Oh, Garth?

Oh, Garth.

Oh, Garth's doing his laundry.

Oh, he's bobbing. He's weaving. He winds up!

Oh, hey, guess what finally came in the mail, Wayne?

Oh, how are you, pal? You better get ready for the show.

Oh, I almost forgot.

Oh, I keep falling over. Oh, no!

Oh, I like to have dinner every night.

Oh, I wish someone would kill him.

Oh, it's just all so confusing.

Oh, Jesus. God, no.

Oh, man, l'm in the wrong business. See, l should be a record producer,

Oh, man.

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God! Rip Taylor! Oh, my God!

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. You're so limber.

Oh, no troubles, bubbles. Great concert, huh?

Oh, no!

Oh, no. No, none taken.

Oh, so you're selling watermelons.

Oh, that fine looking man is your producer, huh?

Oh, there she is. Hey, Cassandra!

Oh, well, let me try to recap the order.

Oh, well, work is hard.

Oh, wow!

Oh, wow.

Oh, yeah. Thanks for doing my laundry.

Oh, yeah. These guys, really sharp.

Oh, yes, Gordon Street.

Oh, yes.

Oh, yes. I just despise it.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh. Hi. Sorry!

Oh. I'm sorry.

Oh. You guys sure look like them.

Oh... Oh, jeez. Wayne, look.

Okay, Garth, ixnay on the url hay.