Gay Purr-ee (1962) Family Edit

A little phrase I coined to describe the incredible proficiency...

A moose! A moose!

A poem, dedicated to Mewsette.

A school for felines?

A turtle with a hangover?

A two headed turtle? Impossible.

A... feline.

According to your instructions, I am having Mewsette's portrait painted...

After all I've done for you. Taught you everything I know...

After her, boys!

All right, all right. It's your poem.

All right, lads, the coast is clear.

All right. I know that, but where's Paris? What is Paris?

All right. Now listen carefully.

Alone, friendless, far from home.

Amedeo Modigliani is a talented young Italian painter...

Amour, amour...

And all felines really like is champagne and champignons...

And all I get on this farm is mice and milk!

And her name is Mewsette.

And I feel so important riding in a buggy and...

And now can we eat?

And now that I'm getting these splints off my tail...

And now, if you don't mind, I do have work to do.

And now, tell me about this friend of yours in Paris.

And since I can't stand to be tickled by no cats...

And so, hoping that you will enjoy them, I ship these paintings on to you.

And that means we have to work.

And that's very wise, my dear.

And tonight I am sending the original article:

And what happens? You meet one little dog and I, Meowrice...

And, dear madame, may I say everything that happens...

Another young painter here in Paris is a volatile Spaniard...

Any sister of Meowrice is a friend of mine.

Are you all right, Mewsette? You look all right.

As they say, "Evil is the root of all money."

At long last, I have found a bride for you. With proper schooling now underway...

At the barn. Hurry! Hurry!

Au revoir, my children.

Au revoir, Robespierre! Take good care of Jaune Tom!

Because, my naive one, there is nothing so romantic as a buggy ride.

Being sorry isn't enough. Now, look, child.

Big green money trees.

Bigger than the whole world.

Brave country, is it not, mes amis?

Bravo!

Bravo! Bravo!

But do they only kiss in buggies?

But not all the love stories of France begin in Paris. No, no, no.

But of course, if you would prefer to go it yourself...

But that is beside the point.

But that's the way I purred back home on the farm.

But, darling, think of Paris. Lovely, gay Paris.

But, my dear sister, how can you continue to bury yourself on this farm?

But...

Call it a weakness. Now get into the basket.

Canned fish?

Catnip weather, no?

Champagne for the greatest mouse catcher in all France...

Champagne. That must be what they call catnip in Paris.

Champignons.

Claude Monet might well be said to be the father of the Impressionist movement.

Come along, my dear.

Come along. We'll take the scenic route home.

Come down from there, Armond, you idiot.

Come on, come on. Read the poem.

Come on, Jaune Tom. Let's go mouse hunting.

Come on, let's go!

Come on, let's go.

Come, my dear. Paris awaits you.

Delightful city, isn't it?

Delightful.

Did you ever have any trouble like that with your girl?

Do you know, if the opportunity arose...

Don't be concerned when you see Auguste Renoir's portrait.

Don't forget to write.

Don't let her fall! I have already paid the postage.

Don't rush things, my dear.

Don't wait up, sister.

Don't we, Jaune Tom? Jaune Tom?

Don't worry, Jaune Tom, I'll be right there.

Don't worry, Jaune Tom, I'm right behind you.

Even cats are sometimes human.

Even more beautiful than I dreamed it would be.

Even pretty girls, hmm?

Everyone.

Everything is packaged these days.

For the last time, my lad, if your friend arrived in that buggy...

For the sake of your dear neck, I do hope so.

Free at last!

Gay, beautiful, wonderful, magnificent Paris.

Gee, thanks. Jaune Tom!

Get moving, you idiots.

Get rid of that dog, you bumbling idiots!

Good as new?

Good morning, Jaune Tom.

Good work, gentlemen.

Gosh, Mewsette, you're not as fat as a duck.

Gosh! We'll never find Paris in all those buildings and things.

Grab the handles. Put your backs into it.

Happy, on this pile of dust?

Have you forgotten the sidewalk cafes and how we sipped champagne?

He is a masterful organier of color, composition and form.

He is known as a 'primitive painter.'

He is not. You're lying...

Hello, Jaune Tom.

Hello, Mewsette.

Help, Jaune Tom!

Help!

Henrietta, you are my sister.

Here is a mouse from me to you

Here, what is this? A turtle, perhaps?

Here. Mail this letter, Armond.

Here's his picture. His name is Henry Phtt...

Hey, it's made out of bubbles.

Hey, Jaune Tom. What are we going to do with our mouse?

Hey, Mewsette!

Hey. Hey, maybe if I...

Hey. Hey, wait a minute. Stop.

Hey. Wait for me!

His name is Pablo Picasso.

How are you, baby?

How can you allow yourself to go to seed like a fat duck?

How dare you think that I would eat such a coarse, plebeian thing.

How foolish I was. I'll never think of that dull farm again.

How gallantly you put your case, Meowrice.

How nice.

How strange. Why is that?

Hurry. Hurry!

I am a...

I can hardly believe it!

I can't, Robespierre. I have to find Mewsette.

I do thank you for making it all possible.

I don't know why she ever came to Paris.

I don't know why you ever came to Paris.

I feel like a cabbage that's gone to seed. Like a fat duck!

I have now.

I just up and decided that I'd vegetated too long on that dreary farm...

I just wanna tell you...

I just want Jaune Tom.

I just...

I know what they are. Mushrooms! And delicious too.

I mean, a mouse. It's as big as a moose.

I mean, at least your eyes do.

I must have a way with felines.

I never want to see you again.

I saloosh...

I shall keep you informed of her progress.

I tell you what.

I tell you, Jaune Tom, it's hopeless. Absolutely hopeless.

I think she means a female, Robespierre.

I think you will agree that before this night is over...

I thought that my sister, one of the most influential cats in Paris...

I want you to see that she is comfortably settled in her...

I wish I were dead!

I'll be back shortly with the belle of Paris.

I'll be back soon and tell you about it.

I'll bet she just lives on "cham pag ne" and "cham pygmy ons" and "champs ulysses."

I'll go to Paris. No more mice and milk for me!

I'm a failure. I'll never be a Parisian.

I'm dying, I tell you!

I'm going back home, back with the peasants...

I'm going to miss that beautiful little thing.

I'm gonna miss you, Robespierre. Take care of yourself.

I'm not exactly a kitten anymore. I choose my friends very carefully.

I'm too pooped.

I've never been so insulted.

If you'll let me out now, Jaune Tom, I'll show you how I really look.

Imagine, not even remembering your own brother!

In full. No money, no Mewsette.

Into the basket? No! Oh, no!

Is it much further to your sister's shop, monsieur?

Is that clear?

Isn't that what you wanted? Isn't that why you left the farm?

It doesn't really matter, though.

It is an imposition, I know, but it would afford me great pleasure...

It must be refined, yet seductive.

It will be later than she thinks.

It will be well worth it, Meowrice.

It would seem to be out of our hands, monsieur.

It's all how you look at it. Honestly, Jaune Tom.

It's all right, Jaune Tom. We'll get back all right.

It's going to take time and money to make a lady out of this cat.

It's just a small, bloodshot kitten.

It's not as big as you think, Jaune Tom.

It's too big, Robespierre. We'll never get back to find Mewsette.

Jaune Tom, help!

Jaune Tom, hold it!

Jaune Tom, I've been such a fool.

Jaune Tom, look out!

Jaune Tom, we're rich!

Jaune Tom, you take that horrid, vulgar thing away from here this minute!

Jaune Tom, you're a...

Jaune Tom, you're wonderful.

Jaune Tom!

Jaune Tom!

Jaune Tom!

Jaune Tom! Help!

Jaune Tom! Jaune Tom!

Jaune Tom! Jaune Tom!

Jaune Tom! Jaune Tom!

Jaune Tom! You take that horrid, vulgar thing away from here this minute!

Jaune Tom?

Jaune Tom?

Jaune Tom? The champion mouser?

Jaune Tom? You mean the world's greatest mouser?

Jaune Tom.

Judge for yourself whether you're getting your money's worth.

Just get into the basket, and you won't have to look at them anymore.

Just give Meowrice my love and then turn him inside out.

Just remember, time is on the side of the scoundrel.

Just think, in a few hours, you will be on a boat to America...

Leave those cats out of here! Allez!

Let us be gay. We shall do the town.

Let's find our way out of here and get back to that feline place.

Let's go home before something happens to us.

Let's go.

Let's go.

Let's go.

Let's join the Foreign Legion.

Let's start looking.

Let's talk this over.

Like this:

Look. There's a message.

Lovely view, eh, mademoiselle?

Mademoiselle! You cannot be inferring that I would suggest anything improper.

Many of them are not yet well known in America...

Maybe if I imagine...

Meowrice, how nice to see you again.

Mewsette has not gotten fat.

Mewsette herself."

Mewsette is my greatest achievement, my crowning glory.

Mewsette is new to Paris, dear sister. I have told her of your wonderful salon...

Mewsette, my dear young friend, you are beautiful beyond compare.

Mewsette, where are you?

Mewsette!

Mewsette!

Mewsette!

Mewsette!

Mewsette!

Mewsette!

Mewsette!

Mewsette! Come back, Mewsette!

Mewsette?

Mewsette.

Mewsette...

Mon dieu! Little turtle, look!

Money trees, that is.

Monsieur Edgar Degas frequently uses ballet dancers as his models.

Monsieur Paul Ceanne is an intellectual artist.

My friends, this is Paris.

My poor dear. I know just how you feel.

Name's Robespierre, manager of him...

Never send kittens to do a cat's job, I always say.

Nevertheless, there are still a few unscrupulous characters about.

Nice fielding, team.

Nighty night.

No girl could resist you.

No last name. Just Mewsette.

No one at all.

No time for games, little turtle.

No time for second story work tonight.

No, no. Let's really live it up big, Jaune Tom.

No! I won't! I'm not going to marry anybody!

No! Please!

No. I am not deaf or something.

No. It is just a little further along this street.

No. She's left, Jaune Tom. Took off.

No. Well, I am discouraged too.

Nobody to...

Not at all like the plebeian peasants you would meet out here.

Not at all. I think your enthusiasm is charming, and I'm not offended.

Nothing like cats' tails for breakfast...

Now look what you've done, you... You old feline, you!

Now try again and put some throat into it.

Now walk towards me. Head erect.

Now you're talking!

Now, get out there and find Mewsette.

Now, hurry. Hurry!

Now, I want no slip ups. The train leaves at midnight.

Now, in Paris, she would be perfumed and curled...

Now, let's show him how poised and gracefully...

Now, then!

Now, you go to beddy bye, and when you wake up...

Obviously, it was too small. Throwing it back was such a noble gesture.

Of course I'm his sister. I've been his sister for years.

Of course. But like any big city, Paris has its pitfalls.

Of love. Of amour.

Oh, boo hoo hoo! So do we.

Oh, but you must think I'm terribly bold to talk this way to a stranger.

Oh, dear, no. Oh. Please forgive me. It's just that...

Oh, gently, gently, shipmate.

Oh, go away, you ple... Ple...

Oh, good heavens, Meowrice. What are they doing?

Oh, I realie that. But after all, I'm...

Oh, it's such a big ocean, Robespierre, bigger than all France.

Oh, look out!

Oh, Madame Rubens Chatte, isn't it wonderful?

Oh, no! Please!

Oh, no.

Oh, thank you. I just know I'll be happy here.

Oh, those nights. So sparkling, so clear, that each star becomes...

Oh, yes, sir.

Oh, yes. Good idea, Robespierre.

Oh, yes. So romantic.

Oh, yes. Yes, of course.

Oh, yes. Yes, of course.

Oh. You are a girl.

Okay, okay. You don't have to push.

On an occasion such as this, we drink champagne.

One bottle of champagne, hot off the ice.

Or catnapped, in your case.

Pardon me, my friend, but that was the most remarkable exhibition...

Paris: The tender mother of romance.

Please. Please don't say anything more. I'm dying.

Plebeian peasant, you!

Plebeians!

Quick, then. We must be off to the train.

Right, Robespierre?

Robespierre, look! Look what it says: "Felines"!

Roses are red violets are blue

Say... No. No, I guess not.

Shaloot... I salute you!

She is an old dear but a little absent minded.

She is, but you don't get her till I'm paid.

She's not down here. Back the other way!

Signed, Jaune Tom.

Sister!

Six weeks. Six whole weeks lost.

So I want one of you to keep an eye on that girl at all times.

So long, Jaune Tom.

So please get into the basket...

So polished.

Sometimes his models have great difficulty holding the pose for him.

Step in here, my dear...

Stop her yourself.

Stop him, someone.

Stop!

Stop.

Sure it is, but you've never given up hope yet.

Sure, sure. What's the matter with me anyway?

Take care of myself? Who's gonna take care of him?

Teach you all you need to know, introduce you to society.

Thank you, monsieur. You are most kind.

That is pretty funny. The same boat, no?

That is what it is. A little village a mile or two up the tracks.

That was a very nice song you were singing, Jaune Tom.

That's all I ever hear around this place.

That's what Mewsette said she was. I'll bet they'd know where she is.

That's what you are, Marie: A cabbage, an artichoke.

The button champignons sauteed in butter with tiny shreds of ham.

The dynamic Paul Gauguin has only recently returned from Tahiti...

The first thing we do is head for that Madame what's her name's salon...

The peasants, they are good and honest...

The rain has stopped and I have work to do. I must swab the deck, yes?

The Rivoli, Maxim's, the Place Pigalle...

The same boat.

The time is around the turn of the century.

The truth is, we have been shanghaied, shipmates.

Then I know just the one for you.

There are other suitors."

There it is.

There she goes!

There was one, for example, a quite unusual one that began in the hot...

There you are, shipmates. I have good news!

They've got Robespierre!

This is the story of a little female citizen of France...

This should be easy.

This weather, she's a little nippy for cats.

Those sidewalk cafes were so much fun. And Paris is so beautiful!

To achieve a strong emotional impact...

To arrive at his delicate color harmonies...

To Mewsette, the prettiest cat In all of France

Tonight I wish to speak of love and marriage.

Tonight I wish to speak to you of something very personal.

Too bad her beauty is wasted here.

Too late, my dear.

Toss him out the door, boys. He ought to make quite a splash.

True, Jeunesse, and vegetables are happiest on farms.

Turn right. Left. Reverse.

Very well, then. I'll write you a check.

We accept! We accept!

We are going out and find Mewsette...

We are headed for Alaska and the gold rush.

We come for gold, we find cold.

We don't want to disappoint Meowrice, do we?

We go to Africa and get warm again, eh?

We understand your feelings, sir.

We will strike it rich, my friends. Then we will return to Paris in style.

We'll wrap it as a gift and give it to Mewsette.

We're free! Free!

We're rich!

We're rich! Now we can go back.

We're too late.

We're too late.

We've struck it rich!

Well, at least I've got this check to cheer me up.

Well, bon voyage, Mademoiselle Feline.

Well, do you see her?

Well, don't just stand there.

Well, I'm off to mail this letter.

Well, if you did away with buggies, you'd stop half the kissing in Paris.

Well, if you don't like us "plebleens," why don't you go away with her?

Well, it won't do here.

Well, thanks a lot.

Well, then tell me something from the girl's point of view.

Well, well, there are your little friends...

Well, why didn't you say so, you epithet?

Well, you look for Mewsette. I'm gonna look for trains.

Well, you're a mouse. You ought to know.

What a head!

What a head.

What are we doing down here, Jaune Tom?

What are we gonna do?

What do you know? She did it!

What do you know? This is no turtle.

What is Paris?

What was it you wished to tell me, Meowrice?

What won't they think of next?

What?

What'll it be your pleasure you're having, s'il vous plait?

What's happ...? What's happening?

What's the matter? Are you deaf or something?

What's wrong with me?

Where are you going, turtle?

Where? Where?

Why didn't she like you?

Why, Jaune Tom, that's the nicest thing anybody ever said to me.

Why, kissing is... Like rubbing noses.

Why, look. It's just made up of little drops.

Why, Robespierre, that's a wonderful idea. That's exactly what I'll do.

Why, that double crosser! That crook! He used disappearing ink.

With his vivid imagination...

Without me, no telling what'll happen to him.

Wouldn't you like to stroll on the boulevard, stop at a sidewalk cafe?

Wow!

Yes, I...

Yes! Oh, yes!

Yes. Here we are, my dear, the best in all Paris.

Yes. I mean, no.

You are going to Pittsburgh to marry that rich American.

You call it the Gay Nineties, no?

You can come on back now. Everything's okay.

You could call it "catnip weather."

You fools. Don't you see those paw prints?

You have thought of marriage, haven't you?

You keep out of it, Robespierre.

You know, Robespierre, we're seeing parts of Paris that the tourists usually miss.

You mean Mewsette...? Mewsette'll take the mouse?

You mean you want me to marry this...

You see, we three are all in the same boat.

You will notice how Monsieur Monet achieves a shimmering light...

Your obedient servant, Meowrice Percy Beaucoup."

Your purr, my dear, it's like a cement mixer.

Your whiskers tickle, cats.

1411 Sand Box Road."

A feline? You're a fe... What?

And order Champs Elysees, just once. Of course, my pet.

And you are the king of the scoundrels. Yes.

Are you mad? Is it a school or something for felines?

But cats like mice. Perhaps so.

But I am not a cat, I'll have you know. You're not a...?

Come on. Let's go home. No, Robespierre.

Do you feel better now, my dear? Oh, yes.

Ducks don't go to seed, my dear sister. Well, like a vegetable then.

First trip to Paris? Oh, yes.

Get away from here! Scram! Go on!

Here we are. Oh! So soon?

I can't go back without Mewsette. Well, I can.

I mean, it's a whopper. A mouse?

I suppose I have. Good.

I wonder what they taste like. Oh, what a lovely feline.

I would love to meet your sister. Then it is settled.

Is he nice? My dear sister, what manners.

It's better than money. Now, that's more like it.

Let's go back to the farm. Okay. Okay.

Mewsette, where are you? Jaune Tom!

Milk. Milk?

No? Well, a village, maybe? Yes.

Nothing but fun now that Mewsette's gone. What do you mean she's gone?

Now, back to your lessons, my dear. Goodbye, Meowrice. And thank you!

Now, l... But that would hardly be proper, would it?

Of course, dear brother. Then she is all yours, Henrietta.

Oh, dear me. You need a friend, a sponsor.

Oh, no. I'll try very hard this time. Good.

Oh, stop! Oh, I'm sorry, Madame Rubens Chatte.

Pardon me, sir, but did you see...? He went thataway.

Please sing some more for me. Mewsette...

Quiet! Stop that noise! Go away, you silly little pussycats.

She just went away in a carriage. Carriage?

She's probably miles from here. Yeah.

Straight cream. No, no, messieurs.

This is Mewsette, my dear sister. Isn't she pretty?

Virtu what sity? Virtu mouse ity.

Visiting relatives? Oh, no.

Well, why did she go to Paris? All felines go to Paris, I guess.

What carriage? The one that took her to Paris.

What's kissing? Kissing?

Where are you, Jaune Tom? Over here, Robespierre.

Where's Mewsette? She's in danger.

Who is it, dearie? There's no one here.

Why, brother. Don't tell me...? Momentary lapse, my dear.

Yeah, I suppose you're right, Robespierre. Well, come on then.

Yeah, thanks. Never mind the thanks.

Yeah. There's a lot of them, all right. I told you it was a wild goose chase.

Yes, I know, but... They've taken her to Meowrice's...

Yes. How silly of me.

You know what must be done. Now, look here, Meowrice.

You're not a cat? Not a cat?

...a mush.

...all your dreams will come true.

...alone in a strange city, by all means. Oh, no, please.

...and an impression of air and space.

...and Champs Elysees...

...and have a stunning coiffure.

...and his manager.

...and his paintings show the influence of the South Sea Islands.

...and I don't know anybody in Paris and it's all so wonderful...

...and I think she's still there. Thanks a lot.

...and that every girl should see Paris and Jaune Tom is so dull...

...and they're bound to know where she is.

...and very happy.

...and your new, old, rich husband.

...boating on the Seine...

...but back there, among those barrels, is a...

...by the clever placing of tiny dots of paint...

...by the most famous artists in Paris.

...clumsy country clod.

...compartment.

...down to bid you goodbye.

...fat, old...? You are as bright as you are pretty.

...have to save your miserable, worthless lives.

...he is creating a charming world of his own...

...he often uses pastels instead of oil paints.

...he sometimes applies paint directly from the tube.

...I might not be able to resist it.

...I'm gonna tear your tails off and have them for breakfast.

...if you would join me for a bite of dinner and perhaps a sip of...

...in the province known as Provence.

...in which he creates his astonishing effects...

...is a man of violent temperament: Vincent van Gogh.

...is because of your faith in me?

...Jaune Tom, the world's greatest mouser.

...just like you did about everything else.

...like a good little bride to be.

...made you despicable scoundrels beyond compare.

...might be persuaded to take you under her wing.

...next to each other.

...of "virtu mouse ity" I've ever witnessed.

...of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, U.S.A.

...or there will be four new violins in the world.

...out of the chill night wind.

...she has gone to Paris.

...she will be the most beautiful and talented cat in the world.

...so please allow me to tell you a little bit about each one.

...sun drenched region in the south of France...

...that you're all a wonderful bunch of gentlemen.

...the glittering point of a great blue diamond.

...throughout the picture...

...to do him a disservice...

...we walk with a bowl of milk on our head.

...where I belong. No! No! Stop her! Stop her!

...where oranges grow on banana trees.

...who is as beautiful and as innocent as her name.

...who is perhaps best known for his striking posters for the Moulin Rouge.

...who shows every indication of someday setting the art world afire.

...who shows great promise.

...with the music of Paris surrounding and caressing us.

...with?

...you just displayed in apprehending that rodent.

...you know I can't sing it when you're looking at me.

...you'll be on a boat going to meet that rich husband.

"Dear Mr. Phtt:

"Dear Mr. Phtt:

"Jaune Tom, I'm being taken to the train."

"Mr. Henry Phtt, 1411 Sand Box Road...

"Mr. Henry Phtt.

"P.S. I'm afraid that the price we agreed upon...

"Salon de Beaute Pour Felines. Mme. Rubens Chatte."

[ENGLISH]