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Ladies and gentlemen, gather 'round the throne
We got a fantasy king, don't you dare leave alone
This dude's the GOAT, got the rings to show
17-time champion, ain't nobody close
Winning Bourbon & Cigars in his hand, he's the man
Against all the Digital Dealer league, he's got a plan
Livin' in Paradise, Mushroom Tattoo, and more
He's beaten 'em all, can't nobody ignore
13 runner-ups, yeah that's no joke
But this dude's still the master, got the other teams choked
Won six straight titles like Lance Armstrong
No steroids needed, just skill and charm
Winning Bourbon & Cigars in his hand, he's the man
Against Dojo Biden, Weaker N Bunny Piss, and the rest of the clan
Le'Veon a Prayer, Red Zone Princess, and beyond
They all got crushed, can't nobody respond
ESPN execs said, "not even close"
This dude's the fantasy king, that's what matters the most
People pay him to consult, his advice is gold
Got the other teams sweating, can't nobody withhold
Winning Bourbon & Cigars in his hand, he's the man
Against Gurley's 1 Kupp, Kraft Mac n Cheese, and the fan
No Punt Intended, Stafford Infection, and the rest
This dude's the GOAT, he's the best of the best
So that's the story, folks, of the fantasy king
No need for trash talk, his accomplishments sing
If you wanna take him down, you better come correct
Or you'll end up like the rest, totally wrecked.