Heavy Weights (1995) Soundboard Edit

A couple of years.

Aah!

Aah!

Aah!

Aah!

Aah! Aah!

All right, dance is over!

All right, do it to it, Lars!

All right, fine. I blame myself.

All right, guys, you're getting the hang of it!

All right, guys! Hey, look who's here!

All the lights you'll see around this camp..

And be quiet about it.

And I can't do anything about it.

And I see potential.

And make fun of us.

And then everyone will join in!

And we can win I think

At the highest level at all times.

Avoid the obstacles! Excellent! Sharp turn!

Being an only child..

Bestest shape of your short lives...

Bet you wish they were yours

But I snuck in some Oreos for emergencies

But I'm gonna do old Dad one better

But you don't want to be one of those guys.

But you know what I would like?

Butterfingers

Call 911.

Camp Hope! Camp Hope! Camp Hope!

Can I ask you a question?

Can I get that wrench, Phillip?

Candy.

Captain, looks like you're all set here

Chocolicious

Come on, Captain! Come on, baby!

Come on, faster!

Come on, guys, sing!

Come on, men!

Come on, Tim, that song's boring

Concentrate! Find your center.

Counselors, are we all heavyweights?

Da Vinci's "Mona Lisa."

Dear Grandma..

Did you ever hear the story of Icarus..

Did you talk to Child Welfare?

Do the hokey pokey and knock yourself out

Do you know where the bathroom is?

Don't drink the water

Don't forget your wings, man

Don't mess with us.

Don't put Twinkies on your pizza

Don't you? Take a look, boys!

Eighteen?

Excuse me one second.

Excuse me, Nurse Julie

Far away.

Faster, faster, yeah.

Garner, where you from?

Gerry, come on!

Glide!

Go ahead, Roy. Ask away

Gosh, somebody going to die today.

Ha! Haaa...

Harvey, please

Have a nice view of the Blue Ridge Mountains

He escaped!

He is one, we are many.

He's coming! He's coming!

He's going to get us killed.

He's still behind!

Help!

Hey, don't pee in the water!

Hey! Back off!

Home stretch! Go, go!

Hooray. Ooh, yeah, OK

How about taking it easy on my guys this year?

How many times can you go on the go karts?

How you doin', little Tony?

However, my dad's a lawyer.

I don't blame myself. No, not this time, Tony

I don't know, Tim. I live very far away

I don't like to call them crystals

I don't think it'll fit under this

I don't want to put any pressure on you, Big Al...

I guess I'm going

I had bad skin, low self esteem..

I have candy

I have no idea what I'm saying

I have some friends in Child Welfare.

I knew the food would be bad..

I know it's not my fault, but whose fault is it...

I know you can do it

I know, Pat...

I see a famous rap artist

I see the future chairman of a Fortune 500 company

I think she's looking at me.

I think there might be a way out of this...

I weighed 319 pounds

I'll find the candy.

I'm doggin' it, Pat!

I'm gonna talk to Tony

I'm only kidding.

I've never scored a point in anything

In my entire life...

It's called boogie fever!

It's time we all got our acts together, buddy.

Join in! It'll be contagious!

Josh, it's me Gerry.

Josh, the drawers!

Just because I got these great, skinny buns of steel

Keep it under 70. We got some weird local cops

Kenny the cameraman, are you a heavyweight?

Kiss my butt!

Know what we found out?

Lars, have a nice summer.

Lars, shouldn't you be watching the kids?

Leave him. He's a straggler

Lemonade, lemonade

Let's go! Take your base, you big baby!

Let's just get out of here.

Let's load her up!

Let's make the best of this afternoon.

Let's move it, Roy.

Life.

Look!

Looks like London bridge is falling down, huh?

Love, Gerry.

Maury Garner, wouldn't want to hear...

May I introduce Tony Perkis!

Maybe I should give them a call.

Mm. Can you smell it?

Mmm!

Mom!

New kid! Yo!

Nicholas, you know what to do

No

No

No problem.

No way. This guy is sick!

No, I have a bad...sprained..

No, Pat, don't go

Nobody really cares what you have to say.

Now, it's time to meet your new owner and operator.

Now, let's play the fun game..

Oh, my God

Oh, shoot!

Oh, well...I'll find it.

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Ohh, my arm!

Ohh!

OK, cats, let's rock it

OK, everyone. Here we go.

OK, kids, out with the old, and in with the new

OK, let's go!

One of those fish and chips farts there, Nickie?

Ooh!

Oooooooh!

Ow, my arm.

Papa.

Parents!

Parents' Day is just around the corner...

Phillip, look at this

Pretty impressive stuff, huh, Tony?

Put it in the pocket...

Quayle

Quite the ending to a late night infomercial, hmm?

Rock 'n' roll.

Run! Run! Go!

Sam? Why don't you come out and join me?

Saving the dance. Come on.

Say it one more time, because it'll multiply.

Scatter!

See you got a promotion.

Simms, way to hustle.

Stop! Stop that stupid song!

Strong and fair.

Team of the future, I say

Team Perkis!

Thank you, Gerry.

Thanks, Lars. That's great

That helps us learn each other's names

That's foul!

That's Kenny the cameraman

That's weird, Tim.

That's what the lawyer said.

The best bunk in the entire camp

There goes your perfect game. Come on!

There'll be no food. This is a cleansing hike

They've never been to fat camp.

Think you'd be able to handle those hairpin turns?

This is the eighteenth level of the Perkis system.

This relay today will consist of three parts

This'll be great

Though I must say..

Tim, take me out, please!

Tim, what happened, did you have a baby?

Today is Evaluation Day.

Today, we're going to make pasta primavera

Tony believes in you.

Tony must be doing something illegal around here.

Tony's arranged a dance with the girls' camp...

Uh...No.

Uhh!

Uhh!

Uhh!

Uhh!

Uhh! Ah!

Uhh! Ahh!

Uhh! Guhh!

Uhh! Uhh!

Unh!

Unh!

Use your weight. Lean into them

Van Gogh's "Houses at Auvers

Watch out for Salami Sam!

We already know each other's names

We can't, man. They're guarding the door.

We're as good as anybody..

Well, congratulations.

Were you in jail? The nut house?

What are we gonna do with you, man?

What are we waiting for?

What's going on?

Where's the motor, man?

Where's the sweets?

Whoa

Whoa! Aah!

Whoo hoo!

Whoo!

Whoo!

Why don't we rock Gerry's world?

Why don't you show them how to throw up after meals?

Will join me on a 20 mile hike

Would you like to have some of this...punch?

Wunderbar. You may advance

Yeah, I break up with my girlfriend every summer.

Yeah! Hold it. Whoa, whoa.

Yes, sir, Captain!

Yes.

You please announce everyone's name.

You are the fattest boy in camp.

You be the leader now, Captain.

You can go as high as 15 feet

You can't do it!

You gotta keep it a secret.

You guys, these are our letters home.

You want to hear something cool?

You with us, or are you against us?

You...come here.

You'll all be doing this by Labor Day!

You're a negativity spreader

You're obviously a very powerful man, Lars

55. No

Hurry up. All right, all right.

Oh, my Whoa!

Oh, my. I didn't mean to. Just go!

Oh! Crazy about my gal.

Pat, are you heavyweight? I'm a heavyweight!

Pull over, please! Don't bug me!

Uhh! Look out!

Whites right here. Just throw it in!

You know what I mean. No, I don't

...cruising altitude of 29,000 feet.

"Body system"?

"Perkisize with Tony"?

# A place for boys #

# Ahh, freak out! #

# And everybody wants to love, and they want to love #

# And have a real good time #

# And I am Kenny the cameraman #

# And I won't work for nobody but you #

# And they want to live #

# Back off, Jack #

# Back off, Jack, we're all heavyweights #

# Camp Hope, Camp Hope, we all had fun #

# Chant the rhyme, come on along #

# Closer to free #

# Dancin' to the rhythm in our heart and soul #

# Everybody wants to be closer to free #

# Everybody wants to live #

# Everybody wants to live, and they want to live #

# Feel the rhythm #

# Has your head spinning all around #

# Hey, back off, Jack, I'm a heavyweight #

# I believe in miracles #

# I want candy #

# If people laugh when you walk by #

# La la la la la #

# Make sure the shower door is shut #

# My name is Pat, And he's our pal #

# On Saturday night... #

# Ooh ooh ooh #

# S a t u r d a y night #

# S a t u r d a y, night #

# Saturday night #

# Since you came along #

# To turn me on, just set my dial #

# Yeah, and yeah, yeah #

# Yeah, baby #

# You got to hang tough #