Men in Black: International Edit

A couple things before I went back.

A figure of speech, but fine.

A high ranking member

A L I E N S?

A little higher...

A lot more of it? Because I'm in.

A member of the Jababian royal family

A mole for who? Where would he take it?

A mole, sir, inside these very walls.

A nothing.

A portal from Sector C has been activated.

A raccoon. Yeah, that's your problem, folks.

A random civilian simply waltzes in

A species called Dyadnum.

A title of great eminence and stature.

A young, up and coming field agent who had certain

Aah! Hey! Get...

Aah! My queen!

Absolutely. No one leaves the medina, all right?

Access granted, Agent M.

Accounting.

Across the interior of the photosphere?

Actually, it's harmony.

Actually, on second thought, maybe I could use some backup.

Actually, that's why it would be right up your street.

Agent H, bring up the Dyad forensic report.

Agent O had a feeling about you, and she was right.

Ah, here. This is it.

Ah!

Ah. You came to say goodbye.

Aliens wanna look like humans, humans wanna look like aliens,

All I have to do is figure out

All it takes is one bad apple to spoil any environment...

All right, buddy.

All right, who's she working for?

All right. Drink this.

All right. Let's see.

All right. Okay, okay, okay.

All right. Take this. I'll draw them away.

All will be explained if you look right...

Always remember,

Am I...? I'm repeating myself, aren't I?

Amateur hour. Am I right?

An agent without a pawn, if you see my meaning.

An awful, terrible incident in Marrakesh.

An unlicensed Tarantian from Andromeda II.

And a failure of this magnitude

And a Series 7 De Atomizer.

And as you will no doubt have divined, Agent M,

And besides, we weren't interested in labels.

And brought it here.

And by the color temperature,

And deal with the guys from...

And everything on it.

And her intoxicating beauty.

And I apologize for letting you down.

And I don't know where the hell he has gone!

And I wanted to offer assistance.

And I was distracted by her feminine wiles

And I will be back. No, it won't take long.

And I won't have that for long.

And if you should die before I,

And in other business,

And look at that.

And my grandpa in that picture.

And others just get shot. What are you doing here?

And our Series 7 De Atomizers.

And perhaps a dozen high level agents.

And remember, we care.

And report to MIB in New York on Monday.

And take you down

And the saddest man on Earth.

And then leave it until the dark takes me.

And we assume that Vungus didn't leak

And we made history here too, didn't we, H?

And what about Naples? How did he know we were there?

And word gets out that T,

And you brought the lovely M.

And you don't just get it, you earn it.

And you kept this from me? For how long?

And you let them go, sir.

And your cards.

Another round.

Anything at all? Come on.

Anything I want?

Anyways, I compiled a dossier for you to read.

Anywhere on the street. Cover the bike up

Apologies, sir. I was working late. Morning, everyone.

Archway and sewer now.

Are on nice and tight, and we were never here.

Are we in danger? Does it have rabies?

Are you a queen?

Are you both all right?

Are you pimping me out to Vungus?

Are you questioning my loyalty, sir?

Are you saying that you need me to save the world?

Are you still there?

Are you suggesting we try a weaponized star for fun?

Argh. Damn it. All right, nobody move!

Around much longer.

Arrogant and reckless. That's nice.

Arrogant. Reckless.

Article 13.

As clearly stated in Section 6C of the Treaty of Andromeda II,

As long as it is to borrow, not steal.

As we all know, the Hive doesn't just destroy their enemies,

Ask her again down on the ground.

Ask her on the way down.

At the moment you're supposed to be there.

At the moment you're supposed to be there.

At the very least, your judgment.

Au revoir.

Bark, woof, et cetera, et cetera.

Bassam has only one real buyer:

Bassam misunderstood.

Bassam, listen, all right, mate?

Because he said it to me.

Because I can see her.

Because I feel like it's zero.

Because I have absolutely no life whatsoever.

Because I'm smart.

Because, you see, that blinking light back there

Before I have to give you a ticket.

Believe it or not, Vungus here

Boring me.

Both human and alien, at risk.

Brains the size of a pistachio nut.

Bring them straight to me.

Broken down machine. What do you got?

But he kept going on about relying on me,

But I assume it's a lot of this type of nonsense.

But I know H. Whatever he's doing, there's a reason.

But I'm not fornicating with the Jababian.

But in a cold, kind of polite way.

But it turns out, it was him.

But maybe the best way to honor the dead

But my job is saving the planet, and that's what I do.

But not for this.

But on Earth, it means we're entering an MIB safe haven.

But really?

But she does have one weakness.

But the DNA, the mutations. High T showed us that sample.

But there's no stopping this.

But Vungus didn't look too good.

But we are the Men in Black.

But what if you can't stop him? Then what?

But would you mind giving me one good reason?

But you can't always trust your gut, H.

But you know that, since you speak fluent Jababian.

But you're not supposed to be here.

But, I mean, I sang at Vungus' mother's funeral.

But, no, no, I'm not a queen.

Call Riza.

Came in a couple of minutes ahead of you.

Can we do this another day? I have another visitor.

Can't trust them. They're not real.

Careful.

Caught him in the locker room.

Chance of survival: zero.

Change it, change it.

Check, please.

Classic, but still kind of stylish.

Code Black.

Come in closer on that body cam there.

Come on!

Come on!

Come on.

Come on.

Come on.

Come on.

Come on. Come on, I know, I know this is your jam.

Come on. I saved the world.

Come on. We'll have a fun time.

Come with me.

Come, sit next to Vungus.

Conflict of interest for you to know my private life.

Congratulations to you too.

Congratulations, probie.

Congratulations.

Consider it a parting gift.

Could you zap me with that forgetting thing, please?

Crap. Oh, crap. Oh, crap.

Cute.

Definitely no chill.

Despite your personal feelings,

Did he indicate why he was here?

Did he want something from us?

Did she really hack into the Hubble Telescope

Did you know that Jababians are claircognizant empaths,

Do try to keep up.

Do you know what a Pawny does

Do you know what that does to a human body?

Do you know what your tell is?

Does his job include tracking us?

Doesn't that mean that it was someone...

Don't be a dick. Who says "farrago"?

Don't be scared. It's okay.

Don't believe everything you read.

Don't make it the same day I come into possession

Don't shoot. Don't shoot.

Don't stop me.

Don't worry. Don't worry. It's all part of the plan.

Don't. Don't start.

Draco, that's Hive territory.

Dumb, beautiful creatures.

Eiffel discovering wormholes,

Emily, sweetheart.

Enough.

Entrance for special guests.

Evening. We're from Animal Control.

Every last one of us from the inside out.

Everybody just wants to do their own thing.

Everyone and everything on it.

Excuse me, ma'am.

Excuse me.

Excuse us for one moment.

Exhaust pipe. Go!

Eyes on! Eyes on!

Far more experienced agents than myself.

Feels pretty real.

Fellas, I think that went pretty well.

Fill me in. What happened, huh?

Finally decided to show up, huh?

Find the killers, we find the mole.

Fine. Let's go.

Fitness, deductive reasoning, logic,

For certain indiscretions.

For giving me closure.

For reasons that you cannot begin to fathom.

For someone who hates lying, that was incredible.

For your preferred division. Everyone has to check a box.

Found it.

Four vodka cranberries.

From a binary star system in the constellation Draco.

From Andromeda II.

From the Jababian War Department Advanced Research Division

From the surveillance camera outside the club.

From total destruction twice...

From what?

From what? From me?

Gangways to other civilizations,

Get my three wood.

Get out here. M, come on.

Get out of there. Get safe. Then report.

Get out of there. Get safe. Then report.

Get this ship out of here.

Get used to seeing me, pretty boy.

Get Weapons Department started on something

Give her the box.

Give me a lift back to London?

Give me another chance and I'll fix this. I promise you.

Give me one good reason why not.

Go ahead and make sure those trash can lids

Go to Vungus. I'll cover you.

God, do I hate Paris.

God, shut up.

Good boy. If you will.

Good, because we're going to Naples.

Good.

Good. I'll talk to the bosses upstairs.

Goodness me.

Gotta be an explanation. M, come on.

Gotta turn my earpiece off for this.

Great job, H.

Guess it's only fair that you know mine.

Guys, back up a little bit, all right?

H Bomb!

H has decided to grace us with his presence after all.

H is one of the best agents ever to wear this suit.

H worked alone.

H, I don't think that you beat the Hive that night.

H, speaking of agents...

H, there's something I've been meaning to tell you.

H, you gotta see this.

H! A little help here!

H?

H? H, are you okay?

H? It is really you?

H.

H.

Ha! I can't believe that actually worked.

Hah, okay, that implies something sexual.

Hand sanitizer, sometimes all at once.

Handcuffed to a horse again, heh.

Hang on. Hang on.

Hang out here and shut up?

Happily walk away from,

Has a layover on his way to Centaurus A.

Has threatened the very existence of the planet.

Have a dance, okay? M loves to dance.

Have a nice life, bozos!

Have a nice life, bozos!

Have you shown this to T?

Haven't I been good to you?

He didn't look too good before, but.

He gave it to me so it wouldn't go to them.

He gave this to me as a gift. It has a chip inside it.

He has changed.

He hasn't been the same since the Hive. Look. Look.

He helped so many intergalactic refugees

He is cute in an ugly sort of way, isn't he?

He knew it could destroy worlds, and he gave it to you.

He prefers vodka, tequila,

He said that you'd changed.

He said, "We have to lie to the world,

He saved the world once with nothing but his wits

He saved the world?

He thinks I'm what? Sorry?

He thinks you're hot.

He was a reptilian slimeball,

He was doing his job.

He was the very best we had to offer. He will be...

He's gone.

He's just so yummy.

Heh. No, I haven't. Passion is unstable,

Hello, M.

Hello?

Hello.

Hello. Ha ha ha!

Help me.

Here comes trouble.

Here we go.

Here.

Hey there. What are you doing?

Hey, did they bring in that Zamporian yet?

Hey, Guy, do me a favor.

Hey, guys, what are the odds?

Hey, guys.

Hey, hey, that's enough. Listen.

Hey, hey. Come on, now. This isn't about you.

Hey, I need to talk to you about something.

Hey, if you wanna use me as alien bait,

Hey, look at you.

Hey, quick question, no big deal.

Hey, this is...? This is Earth?

Hey, uh, quickly.

Hey, you gonna call this in, or what?

Hey, you're not gonna actually go through with this, are you?

Hey!

Hey! I know you're in there somewhere!

Hey. Nope, I'm awake. It's all right.

Hi, everyone. If you could all look right here.

Hi, you.

Hide this.

High T and I went to face the Hive

High T is the mole. He's gotta be.

Highly redacted, of course.

His own location to the killers,

Hm, really? And what's important?

Hm.

Hm.

Hmm? This?

Hmm? Yeah? Come on.

Hold on tight.

Hold on, Pawny!

Hold on!

Holograms always add 10 pounds.

Hoo, hoo!

Horatio.

How incredibly eye catching you yourself are.

How is he?

How it works between species, so...

How many people can say that?

How many people really knew that he was here?

How would you like to be able to destroy

How'd you beat the Hive?

How's it going?

Huh? What is it going to take?

Hurry!

I actually used to think you could lead this place.

I ain't never seen nothing like that before.

I am MIB, you Cerulian scum.

I am protecting this institution.

I assume you'll want me overseeing the case? Sort of...

I believe the appropriate phrase is...

I came to talk, H. We need to speak.

I can move this stuff.

I could feel it.

I could jump higher, but it would've been more awkward.

I couldn't fake that.

I deleted the photos. Promise.

I didn't know you had a weapon.

I discovered a possible truth.

I do a good job at it. While that's still happening,

I don't blame you.

I don't know how you do it, but you keep doing it.

I don't know why you always insist

I don't like it any better than you,

I don't like to be lied to.

I don't like what the earth is doing now.

I don't make the rules. Take it up with him.

I don't think it's just a blade.

I don't think this is doing anything.

I don't think you know what you're dealing with, so...

I don't think you're a meteor after all, are you?

I don't understand.

I don't understand. Someone he only just met.

I found you.

I got him. I got him.

I guess what... What I'm trying to say is,

I had to know.

I hadn't trusted London branch for some time.

I have been meaning to try that.

I have nothing that I couldn't

I have nothing. I have no dog, no cat,

I have the forensics report

I have to go.

I have to know...

I haven't seen that before.

I heard you were on the Vungus meet,

I helped him.

I just don't believe that he has.

I just gave a whole speech.

I just love

I just thought this would be more effective.

I knew all along that something was off.

I knew I could count on you.

I knew that kid was neuralyzing himself.

I knew who you were from the start.

I knew you would hit it off.

I know a Tarantian.

I know he's still in there somewhere.

I know how you like special pets,

I know Riza. She may be the Merchant of Death,

I know Vungus. He doesn't really drink tea.

I know what that thing is. Please.

I know what you're talking about. Wait.

I know where the weapon's going and how to get it back.

I know why you're here.

I know.

I know. He looks cute now.

I know. I agree.

I like trouble.

I look good in black. I'm...

I love a businesswoman.

I love that option.

I mean, hey, I'm pretty sure he trusted me. Heh.

I mean, me too.

I mean, think about it. It would explain a lot.

I mean...

I met one once.

I must end my own life

I never thought of this,

I never understood the reason why.

I pledge loyalty eternal to you, Agent M.

I prefer to look at this from a macro point of view,

I promise to end my own life...

I promise, I don't bite.

I read that it dramatically improves

I recovered evidence you stole from a crime scene.

I rounded it down to zero

I said to the Dyads we'd do anything to save our world.

I see the... The photosphere bit.

I still don't like you.

I think he's been chasing it the entire time.

I think we may have a problem in London.

I think what we're looking at is a super compressed star.

I think you were neuralyzed.

I think you'll find that she clearly is here

I thought he was covering for you,

I thought that we were here.

I told him, "Do that too much, and you'll go blind."

I told O I had to take care of

I wanna know everything.

I wanna know how it all works.

I want some asses wiggling.

I want some perfection."

I want to know how it all works.

I want to know the truth.

I want to see my kids.

I wanted to see you. And I brought you something.

I was about to run a molecular deconstruction

I was actually looking forward

I was thinking, for the op, I can take the perimeter,

I was wrong about you.

I will leave you to your...

I work alone. Ask anyone around here.

I would just, uh.

I wouldn't do that.

I wouldn't say "everything." Always more to learn.

I'd like a nice pastrami sandwich.

I'd say it's a blue giant.

I'll escort our Zamporian friend back.

I'll have him home by midnight.

I'll meet you at the main square in 20.

I'll never serve another. I swear it.

I'll pay you extra.

I'll plunge my dagger

I'll show him. Go on.

I'll speak to you in the morning. Hydrate.

I'm a bit of a Jababian wonk.

I'm a Pawny, you psycho!

I'm a quick study.

I'm coming!

I'm down with the mission,

I'm driving.

I'm finished covering for you, H.

I'm getting sick of hearing this "you've changed" crap.

I'm going to call you back.

I'm going to need more.

I'm gonna get it back.

I'm gonna hop back in for a second.

I'm gonna trust my gut.

I'm good.

I'm in the market for a useless, old,

I'm kidding.

I'm motivated.

I'm not gonna doubt your general trustworthiness,

I'm not losing another queen.

I'm not making fun. I'm genuinely asking.

I'm sending you backup. Out.

I'm sick of you.

I'm sorry. Probationary head?

I'm T. High T.

I'm the same person I was years ago.

I've been waiting a long time for this.

I've had the conversation.

I've heard a lot about you.

I've let you kill anyone you wanted.

If having a big, old heart is a crime, then shoot me.

If it's about that night in Beirut,

If those were the only people that knew where Vungus would be,

If we stop him, no one ever has to know.

If we've been compromised,

If you don't mind.

If you erase us, you will never know the truth.

If you know what I mean.

If you look closely, you can see my grandma

If you think about it, really think about it...

If you think we'll hand this over,

If you'll tell your lady she now has power.

If you're not down with...

Imagine what you will accomplish when you're one of us.

Immediate termination, followed by neuralyzation.

Impress me, and we'll see about the bzzz.

In a word, yes.

In as many years.

In fact, he specifically asked for you.

In short, he wants to be shown a good time.

In something you're not?

In the most gruesome way imaginable."

In the most painful way possible.

In the old days, we'd have hired her.

In the strongest possible terms.

In their galaxy, a symbol for hope or annihilation.

In three, two, one.

Including us. You don't think we should've spoken about this?

Inherited the title.

Inside MIB?

Into my own body, like this, through my vital organs,

Is a traitor, the agency will never recover.

Is going to solve all your problems?

Is it?

Is that right?

Is the friendships you lose. Heh. Ahh.

Is the looker in the crowd.

Is there anything else, Agent C?

Isn't the whole universe a chemical reaction?

It boils you from the inside out.

It erased my parents' memories, but it didn't take mine.

It is. Night is young. Whoo hoo!

It means:

It puts every citizen on this planet,

It sounds like I got promoted and demoted at the same time.

It took me 20 years to find you, plus or minus.

It was a totally unsanctioned op, sir,

It was a... It was a...

It was my honor.

It was some of his best work. Look around!

It was worth a try.

It was, like, a creature.

It's a Cromulian tag.

It's a fine line between club casual

It's a process. Attachment issue, I think.

It's a rough translation.

It's a separate thing. A coincidence.

It's all happening.

It's all right. I'll get this one.

It's always, "Oh, Jababia this,

It's been a steep learning curve, yeah.

It's been a while, huh? That's the tough thing about breakups,

It's called a neuralyzer.

It's formal, but not too stuffy.

It's genius. I wish I thought of it.

It's Henry.

It's like a fetish.

It's me, H.

It's never who you think it is.

It's nice to meet you, sir.

It's not important.

It's okay.

It's okay.

It's the Imperial with the red tab.

It's the only thing that can protect you.

It's very simple, darling. Do you want it or not?

It's what I say to my heart...

It's what I've heard. There's only one place in the world

It's you?

Jababia that, Jababia, Jababia, Jababia!"

Jababian society doesn't allow

Jimmy's coming back to get the kids.

Just catching up on my daily meditation.

Just drive.

Just let me know next time.

Just like riding a bike.

Just one problem.

Just our daughter. She's sleeping.

Just play around with it. I trust you.

Just play around with it. I trust you.

Kabla nakshulin, what does it mean?

Kabla nakshulin!

Kabla nakshulin?

Kabla nakshulin.

Kabla nakshulin.

Kabla nakshulin.

Kanye showed up and dropped a whole new album.

Keep Daddy happy, yeah?

Keep it. Keep it.

Keep your eyes on. It's not safe.

Kill them.

Know what?

Language, culture, politics, fashion.

Last call for Flight 2112 to the Cat's Eye Nebula.

Leadership qualities, shall we say.

Left alive to sell the lie.

Let me assure you, we will deal with this

Let's be honest, there were a few bumps along the way,

Let's do this.

Let's get his car and get him out of here.

Let's get you in here. All right.

Let's go home.

Let's go.

Let's keep them coming, shall we?

Let's keep this safe, shall we?

Let's make it possible. Where's the weapon?

Let's press the button. Let's see what this does.

Let's press the red button again.

Let's talk business, shall we?

Let's try this again, shall we?

Listen, if it turns out what you're saying is true

Listen. A queen's pawn without a queen is just a pawn.

Little on the job training, if you will.

Little tip, expense everything.

Lockdown protocol engaged

Look at you. You've lost weight.

Look at your little legs.

Look for the icon marked advanced extensions.

Look, you weren't wrong about me, sir.

Looks like a couple days' worth.

Looks like it carries some poison.

Looks like the tables have turned.

Looks like we'll be seeing a lot more of each other.

Luca, you can't do this.

Luca.

M here is an agent.

M knows everything about Jababia.

M may be right.

M, go ahead. Explain yourself.

M, he's keen for you to shadow me.

M, it appears you're as sharp as advertised.

M, please.

M!

M!

Made me a hero, the guy that saved the world.

Makes it a very Eyes Wide Shut kind of vibe.

Marrakesh, the Empty Quarter, Naples.

Maybe he trusted me.

Maybe I am a few of those things occasionally,

Maybe they needed the weapon to use against the Hive

Maybe we lose the tie first, yeah?

Means there's been a breach in Portal 2.

Meditation.

Men in Black. The Morons in Black, if you ask me.

Meow, meow.

MIB finally showed you the door, eh?

MIB!

Milan, Rome, Madrid.

Mind telling me one more time?

Mind the gap.

Mitochondrial energy production.

Mm hm. Well, for science and fun.

Mm hmm.

Mm mm.

Mm. Human or...?

Mm. Maybe ratchet it up a few notches,

Mmm... No, but it looks damn good on you.

Molly?

Molly? Are you shitting me? Really?

Molly.

Morning, sir.

Morning.

Move, and I'll obliterate this entire island

Move! Go!

Moving.

Muah.

Murdered by assailants that you can't identify,

My bad, guys. Come on.

My dear boy, you were always a bright one...

My guess would be Paris.

My gut, not yours!

My lady says thank you.

My lady, the jackass wants a torque wrench.

My lady?

My mitochondrial energy's through the roof.

My queen!

My queen!

My sources say that Vungus stole it

Nasr said you were dead.

Nasr! I need to borrow your bike.

Needing our top agent, that sort of thing.

Nerlene!

Neuralyze her.

Never had a bath before.

New York.

Next time you bring a peace offering,

Nice save.

Nice to meet you both.

No love? No relationships?

No one's been out to collect.

No, but thank you for...

No, he seemed pretty normal, happy.

No, he was one of the best agents to wear this suit.

No, honey. Tell me what a Pawny is.

No, I just think there are

No, I only have one, Sebastian,

No, I think hyperdrive is blue.

No, I'm gonna give you five seconds.

No, like driving it.

No, like...

No, no, no.

No, no, no. Don't.

No, no, no. I'm not interested in a subject.

No, no. She is a probationary agent,

No, not Beirut. Just...

No, we saved the world, for God's sakes.

No! You don't have to do this.

No?

No. He dealt with the Hive before.

No. I don't know if you've heard,

No. Not a thing.

No. Not H.

No. Try and cope.

No. We didn't.

Nope, I think you are an unauthorized landing.

Nope.

Nor participate in the murder thereof.

Not a neuralyzer in the world could make me forget that.

Not get bogged in the details.

Not in this country.

Not long at all. Okay.