Rock Star (2001) Edit

A long, long time ago...

After the nuclear holocaust...

Again, please.

All I know is I owe a guy named Rob a big fat apology. That's for sure.

All right, go again.

All right, I gotta go. Here you go.

All right, ladies, who had the weenies?

All right, ladies. Spread them.

All right, let's go.

All right, you need to get a grip.

All right, you.

All right!

All right? And the Steel Dragon thing is that A.C. and I write the songs.

All right.

All right. Sorry.

Am I clear?

And a special thanks to my brother, Joe...

And all of the sudden, something came over me.

And I really want to do this thing with Marci in Seattle.

And I said, That guy is going all the way.

And I'm just the queen.

And if they come back to you with very expensive jewelry...

And it's bed, 11 :30 every night before a gig. That's what it takes.

And it's the real one. Look. The fingerboards are rosewood.

And now I'm one of them!

And now I'm one of them. That's right.

And our lost sheep are off enjoying the rock stylings of, say, Ratt.

And put it through a bloody blender!

And that, well, we all know what that is, right? We'd better go.

And three:

And to my parents, because they let me play it as loud as I wanted!

And who says you can't have your own fun?

And you can too.

And you sing the songs that we write.

Anything you want. You just have to ask.

Are those my pants?

Are those your breasts?

Are you all right, Izzy?

Are you done making fun of me yet?

Are you lip synching?

Are you serious?

Aren't you married to a supermodel?

As a matter of fact, can anybody here honestly say...

As far as I'm concerned, it's much ado about nothing.

As the band continues to struggle to continue its

As the mouthpiece of Steel Dragon, I had this responsibility.

As they continue What are they continuing?

Babe, come on. Let's go.

Bastards. You bastards.

Be another clown with a guitar, trying to get attention? No way.

Be doing everyone a favor if you did.

Be nice to this bloke from MTV.

Because I moved out when I was 1 8.

Because they rock!

Before we get too deep into this party, I want to thank Key Steel...

Before we get too into this party.

Being a kid, you know, what else was I to do but to live the Dragon?

Bobby's leaving the band anyway.

Boots from the 'Wasted' tour and a cheap 'Twisted' jacket.

But I am leaving this. I cannot do this every day.

But I figured you're so busy.

But it's different for me. I can't follow a bus all day.

But shouldn't I have some input?

But the tunes have already been written.

But there's so much pussy coming at you every day that...

But, baby, this is all happening to you. And it's great.

Bye bye.

Bye.

Call me Chrizzy, okay?

Can I give you some advice, mate?

Can we get past the 'This Is Your Life' crap?

Can we hook up in Seattle when I get there?

Can you follow the 1 2 3 without sticking a pen in there?

Can you hit all the notes Bobby can?

Check it out.

Cheers.

Chris Izzy Cole of Steel Dragon shocked fans...

Chris Izzy Cole shocked fans Damn it!

Chris? Is that Chris Cole?

Chris. Well, I'm glad we talked. I'm gonna go.

Chris....

Claims he was going out for ice cream. Same story.

Come on, come on.

Come on, please. It's embarrassing.

Come on, right in my lens. Nice shot. Attitude.

Come on!

Come on.

Come on.

Come on. You're wasted. You're absolutely wasted.

Crappy? Whole and a Half kicks ass. I'm proud to have written it.

Cut it.

Cut rate? This dude can't even tune his own guitar.

Cut!

Dinner's canceled.

Do I have too much foundation on?

Do we have to talk about that old slag? I called her Sugar Bum.

Don't go in half assed.

Don't shit on me because you're scared to write your own songs.

Don't sign anything. I had to learn that the hard way.

Dream big.

Dreams come true!

Either get in here and do it or shut up.

Em, I'll be right back, okay?

Emily, you look great.

Emily.

Ever get your ass kicked by a guy with long hair and makeup?

Exactly.

Except Elvis was the king.

Excuse me.

Fantastic. It's brilliant, mate. Fucking brilliant. Off you go.

Feel that?

Follow me, darlings.

Freshening up the blood.

From the looks of you, I had good reason.

Fucking A, mama!

Fucking scintillating, baby!

George Michael's a wuss. I'm gonna give Rob shit for it.

Get going on this one because she's gotta be at work by midnight.

Get out of here.

Get out! I didn't do anything.

Get ready for work. Will you go downstairs?

Get the hell out of here.

Get your own life. It's like being bloody Elvis.

Give us a break.

Go ahead, babe. I'm fine.

Go ahead. Get out there. Get out there, bro. It's all yours.

Go!

Go. Go.

Good afternoon, my darlings. Look, l've been meaning to tell you.

Good hunting at your ranch?

Good man. I'll see you tomorrow.

Good.

Good.

Got an initiation for you. You joined, done a beautiful job.

Grab a T shirt and cassette on your way out. Thanks for coming.

Great. Everything I saw, I killed. Killed something every damn day.

Guys.

Ha bloody ha.

Hang on, hang on. Listen to this, all right?

Have a good one, son.

Have you heard his voice?

Have you listened to the lyrics of Stand Up?

He eats a lot of pussy, that's how.

He said to me:

He was parked on the Brennemans' lawn.

He'll want to cover that.

He's my lover, to the horror of these sausage jockeys.

Heard you the first time.

Heavier than the 'Demented' tour.

Here we go again.

Here, hold on. You got a smudge.

Here's some advice from me. Number one: Learn to share.

Here's the procedure, so it won't happen again. Don't stick a pen in.

Hey, Chris.

Hey, Jeremy, no.

Hi. I'm Izzy's mother.

How amazing was he? Brilliant!

How do I look?

How much longer will you put up with this?

How resourceful.

I am Steel Dragon! Without me, you're nothing!

I bet they're easy to get in and out of.

I busted my ass working on the songs.

I didn't know about the rule.

I didn't remember, but I didn't forget, okay?

I didn't say anything.

I don't care if Bradley can hit the notes Bobby Beers can hit.

I don't give a fuck where he is...

I don't know.

I eat a lot of pussy.

I eat a lot of pussy.

I got it eating pussy. Loads of it. All the time.

I got my voice eating pussy, man. It's a vocal technique exercise.

I got Whole and a Half on a shelf. It's ready to go.

I gotta check your credentials, so have your pussy passes out.

I gotta do him first, because I gotta work at midnight.

I gotta do this MTV thing, then talk to a producer

I have no idea what you're talking about.

I hope I am not as cynical as you are when I am your age.

I just know him and he's not that

I just wanted to find myself. Find my own music.

I keep putting this shit on till I want to fuck myself.

I know all your moves. I study you. I love you.

I know it's crazy, but it comes with the territory.

I know your schedule. I get a copy every day.

I know, I know.

I know. I see that.

I know. Me too.

I live here, Chris.

I love that song.

I love you too.

I love you, man, but you're mental.

I love you!

I love you.

I love you.

I mean, my heart stopped.

I mean, put it this way:

I met Ghode on that bus.

I need more power! I want more!

I need more power! I want more!

I need to take a piss.

I need to talk to you.

I needed to take a piss...

I question his sexuality, Ma. I do.

I said no. Haley, did you answer the telephone? Thank you.

I saw you in Pittsburgh. You gave everybody a pass but me.

I should let Kirk explain everything to you.

I suppose some might call it poetic justice. I don't know.

I thought I was gonna break my neck when I fell.

I thought you were in Seattle.

I told you, it's Kirk Cuddy. I play in a band called Steel Dragon.

I was gonna go over the schedule.

I was just singing someone else's lines.

I'd be working for somebody else...

I'd finish my studies, get a job.

I'll be back in half an hour. Mind your backs, please!

I'll get new cables.

I'll give you a simple one two three procedure.

I'll see you again.

I'll talk to Mats and get you our numbers...

I'm Chris' girlfriend. Manager.

I'm glad you've been having fun writing songs.

I'm gonna go talk to Emily.

I'm gonna sit with his parents.

I'm good. I'm really good. I'm great, actually.

I'm kind of sort of in between bands right now.

I'm not here to check up on him. I was invited.

I'm not just....

I'm not really sure where he is, actually.

I'm serious. If I leave, I'm not coming back!

I'm singing the tunes, so you at least want my stamp.

I'm sorry, Chris. Oh, what were you doing?

I'm sorry, Chris. Oh, what were you doing?

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. What?

I'm standing here, and I'm proof if you work hard and want it bad enough....

I'm standing here, living proof that if you work hard enough...

I'm standing there staring at the wall, as you do.

I'm starting a new band.

I'm Tania. I work with the band.

I'm telling you, first time I ever saw you...

If I get lucky, I'll get to grow up and listen to Air Supply like you.

If I get to be with Izzy, I am going to shit bricks.

If I leave now, I'm never coming back. Never.

If I were you, I'd spend all my time in bed.

If this is Kirk, what did you call your third wife?

If you don't, you don't deserve to play it.

If you know how it goes, then play it right.

If you wanna make it, you write your own tunes.

If you want, take them off. I am not taking off

Is that enough for you?

Is the incredible voice really yours?

Is there something wrong?

Is this a money thing? If you need money

It just didn 't feel right.

It might've slipped my mind. But I didn't forget. I remembered....

It needs a bit of bollocks to it. E.Q. it or something.

It still needs work.

It was before you boys and that rock 'n' roll music corrupted me, man.

It was incredible, man. Thanks, Kirk.

It was so heavy hearing the music played to perfection.

It'll take me five minutes to put together a band and blow them away.

It's 1 2 3. Pop that down, push this.

It's a '58 Flying V in fire mist gold.

It's all good fun. Just makes for good stories, you know?

It's all I do, is eat pussy. I love it.

It's all I do. Breakfast, morning, noon, night. l've got to have it.

It's pathetic.

It's that you don't have any fantasies of your own.

It's twisted that you're still living at home, stealing Ma's makeup.

Izz, you want some?

Izzy, don't worry. I'll make an honest man out of you.

Izzy, it looks great.

Izzy? I'm not calling him Izzy.

Izzy? Oh, my God, is that Izzy?

Izzy. But you don't have to call me that. It's me.

Izzy's departure is more trouble for Steel Dragon...

Jeez, boys. Quit. Break it up. Chris, give him a break. Come on.

Jorg, it's not very brutal. Can we make it more raunchy?

Just a thought, but isn't that a cool cover?

Just do your own thing.

Just stand up and drop it.

Kept going. Didn't come back.

Ladies, ladies, please. A little bit of decorum, please.

Last time.

Let me explain. Come here.

Let's do it, Mats.

Like hell he's not. He's a guy, isn't he?

Listen, make it easier on yourself.

Lock it up! Thank you!

Look, we all know exactly what happens on that bus.

Look!

Look. Jorgen's name is misspelled. It should be an E.

Love you too.

Love you too. Bye.

Lovely.

Making sure nobody sees some cut rate copy band.

Mats, he said, I really need a piss.

Maybe it's an E.Q. thing. Just take a few minutes.

Me?

Mike, but my friends call me Thor, God of Thunder!

Mom! Mom!

Mom? Mom, isn't my room off limits?

Move aside, you scallywags. You're getting in the way of future sales.

Move it.

My choir teacher gives me really cool exercises

My dad bought it from someone who knows them.

My God, this is unbelievable. I was sorry to hear about your dog.

My pursuit of perfection was relentless.

My scarf.

No more metal shit. It's all about hip hop.

No more of this. It's about this. You heard me?

No title, no band name. Could be heavy. What do you think?

No, Em. I did not forget.

No, I have pierced nipples and a house in Morocco because I'm John Wayne.

No, no.

No, this is an opportunity for you...

No. First tell me what you put there to make people think you're a guy.

No. No, I'm not.

No. You want to do yours?

No. You were married?

Not even at your age.

Not without a blowjob and a sex change, pal. But have a nice day.

Nothing says respect like cramming a strip of Lycra up your ass.

Nothing, if you're from the Village People.

Now I affectionately refer to all ladies as Tottie.

Now I'll buy you a drink, mate. Hello, ladies. Thank you.

Now, listen. We've got limited space. Just be patient.

Now, this next tune...

Number two: Get very close with his accountant.

Of course, wait here if you like. He's actually down there.

Of course. Of course.

Off you go.

Oh, God, you two. Such a sexy couple.

Oh, hi. Hello. Now, that's a very important little P, isn't it?

Oh, I thought I smelled pussy.

Oh, my God.

Oh, that was awesome!

Oh, yeah? It's not pimp?

Okay, Backstage Pass. Okay, Crud Pollution.

Okay, Bobby Beers. I mean, Chris Queers.

Okay, don't look. Don't look.

Okay, genius, who's buried in Grant's tomb?

Okay, now just relax.

One day I realized it wasn't for me anymore.

Or did she already rip out the Dodge seats?

Or they get cranky. At the end of the day, they always come home.

Or you gotta use it. Use it. You're awesome. Bye, babe.

Our boy came through tonight. He was on fire.

Out of my bloody way!

People, boat's leaving. All aboard. Quick as you can, please.

Play it like that.

Plug that fucker back in.

Pookie?

Pretty good.

Pull back on this lever, free up the jam and you can access

Quick as you can.

Quickly, boys. Boat's going in a minute.

Quiet! Shut them up behind us. Give us 10 minutes. In we go.

Remember what you wrote for me on my birthday?

Ricki, your accent is as lame as your playing.

Right here!

Right there.

Rob, you're not nailing the squeal.

Rob.

Rule one in this business is you go where the talent is...

She and Rob went to see Wham!, won't be back for a while.

She came to see the show a few years ago. She hadn't changed at all.

She married my best friend. A doctor.

She turns me up and shakes me down and makes me want to what?

She was really a very sweet girl.

She's busy at the moment. Some yearbook committee.

She's really sweet, but I was here first.

Shit. I'm so sorry. I really screwed up, mate.

Sitting in front of a half eaten steak and kidney pie.

So do you.

So follow your dreams, man.

So I know you got there safe, all right?

So I walked out of there.

So I'll see you in Seattle?

So if the chicks don't want you, the guys are gone.

So you arrested Mervin for drunk driving?

So you're in a Steel Dragon cover band.

Somebody's jealous.

Sorry about that.

Sorry, but your dad got ripped.

Sorry, darling, back to the henhouse.

Sorry, sorry. But...

Sorry. Could I start it one more time?

Sounds raunchy in here.

Stand up and shout

Stop it, man.

Suit yourself. It's good for writing lyrics.

Taking a night off, are you?

Tania.

Telephone! You want to help me crack eggs?

Tell them about that thing you do with your tongue.

Tell you what, darling.

Thank you very much.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you. All right, two lovely people.

Thanks a lot, Ralph. That's great.

Thanks for coming. Not too fagged out?

Thanks for the tip, bro. Look, come on, guys.

Thanks.

Thanks.

That makes the guys want to be you.

That makes the guys want to be you.

That was great. Thank you.

That was the heaviest since Columbus in '77.

That's from the 'Delirious' tour, right?

That's it.

That's Kirk's astrologer...

That's not how the song goes.

That's right, because the music deserves to be taken seriously.

That's right!

That's right! This one's for Emily!

That's right. Dreams do come true so follow them.

That's Sammy!

That's the problem. You never do anything.

That's why I'm in the band.

That's why we got so many requests for it.

The actual vest Bobby wore on the 'Twisted' tour.

The boys are waiting in the back. They're working. They need you.

The boys don't like distractions when they're working on their music.

The boys need you there when they work on the tunes.

The Dragons!

The guys are the ones that buy the records.

The guys are the ones that buy the records.

The lapels should be blue, there's no green in the embroidery.

The liver doesn't work as good as it did when I was your age.

The music deserved that.

The problem is, you think you're in Steel Dragon.

The rock star fantasy thing is something you grow out of at 14.

The vacuous, empty world of sex and drugs and rock 'n' roll...

Then somebody does the same to you and you hate it.

There she is.

There's a bit up there. That's it.

There's a bit up there. That's it.

There's a longstanding rule that wives and girlfriends...

There's a ticket waiting for you for a flight to L.A. tomorrow.

There's no solo break after the chorus.

There's no way it can work.

There's still four of us left. We're not going anywhere.

They don't care.

They have three gorgeous little kids.

They haven't played that since Osaka in '75.

They're not playing our videos as much...

They're quite sensational.

They're ready for you now.

Things get crazy. It's hard to keep things straight.

This is Bobby's 'Twisted' tour in '77.

This one's for Kim, who makes me want to stand up and shout.

Those days were amazing.

Told him to arrange Didn't I say to remind me she was coming?

Two teeth, come on.

Very funny.

Very happy.

Very harsh, man.

Wait right here, all right?

We all owe someone an apology along the way. I mean, that's life, man.

We combed this entire planet looking for someone...

We don't deviate because one disappointed fan can turn into two...

We give them what they want.

We heard it sang right.

We kick ass, man!

We loved playing Dragon tunes. We couldn't imagine playing anything else.

We saw a tape of you singing provided by Nina and Samantha.

We traded the first class ticket for two coach.

We want people to hear our originals. We're tired of being a cover band.

We wasting our time here?

We wear G strings, so the guys respect us way more.

We were just talking about how stunningly beautiful you are, really.

We'll pick it up just coming out of the intro.

We're a band called Blood Pollution...

We're in Seattle, Chrizzy.

We're in Seattle. You're in Seattle.

We've been talking about this business and we got our loan.

We've been talking about this business and we got our loan.

Wearing somebody else's clothes. Singing somebody else's songs.

Well, mate, do you want the gig, then?

Well, thanks. That's just what I was going for.

Well, yeah, that'll make a lasting impression.

Well, you're in my house now, mate. And I ain't lost a man yet.

Wham? Oh, God.

What are you doing here?

What are you doing? You know what this is?

What did you think?

What do you suggest I do about my playing?

What happened? If you don't mind me asking.

What is it when you do something to somebody and they hate it?

What is it?

What is this? What?

What the...?

What was what?

What you looking at?

What's he doing?

What's up?

What's wrong with Air Supply?

Whatever twirls your beanie. Come on, mate.

When's Marci getting back?

Where you hiding your stash these days?

While the wives were out shopping.

Who is this?

Who's buried in Grant's tomb?

Why are we here?

Why didn't you rejoin the band?

Why don't we go in here? Somewhere out of the way.

Worked on some songs for the album. They're still rough...

Wouldn't you rather fail as yourself...

Yeah, I eat a lot of pussy.

Yeah, I still think about it sometimes.

Yeah, personal friend of the band. Yeah. One sec.

Yeah, she's very happy.

Yeah, that is so true.

Yeah, that's it. I'm too scared.

Yeah, the name's Izzy, like Izzy's Revenge.

Yeah, they're a bit snug, but that's how I like them.

Yeah, well, I thought so.

Yeah, well, who are they?

Yeah, you did. You forgot I was coming.

Yeah, you know why? Because I can.

Yeah.

Yeah. I sent flowers but I didn't get a response.

Yeah. Just get on the bus.

Yeah. We'll see.

Yep.

Yep.

Yes, it's pass.

Yes, that's fine. You're absolutely fine.

You are so fully wrong, cocksmoker. This is official issue.

You brought the audience home. You did fucking beautiful.

You build up a tolerance to it.

You calm down, you wanker!

You can make me his pants.

You can write a song about why I would wanna do that!

You could get the outfit right.

You don't have to call me Izz. Call me Chris.

You don't have to do that anymore. We're getting our own car.

You don't need people taking falls for you. Please.

You don't turn up for recording sessions.

You either drive yourself batty trying to change it or you adapt.

You got the sex wrong.

You got yourself a Ferrari!

You gotta clear it with us before you do that.

You gotta let him off the leash once in a while.

You guys were at my birthday party. I was born....

You just left her there?

You know I didn't mean it like that, Em. I swear.

You know the drill. No panties.

You know what I always say. If you love someone, let them go.

You know what the sickest thing is about you?

You know who Marci is. My roommate, Rob's girlfriend.

You know, he's a rock star now. The normal rules don't apply.

You know, I'm just a regular guy...

You know, those guys are so replaceable.

You look great.

You made your point. Get him out now.

You missed half the gigs, and when you did show

You ready, Robin?

You should bring your new fiancée up there.

You should. You have a killer body. It's not totally nude there.

You start off with the best intentions.

You think it's all sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll?

You think some child can replace me?

You think you can dress like me and be a star?

You want to do the other one?

You want to do your thing.

You want to rip the roof off this place?

You won't need it, but there's a bucket in each wing, all right?

You'll be great, babe. I love you so much.

You'll be playing for coppers in the tube without me!

You'll get used to it.

You're hanging with the hardcore now.

You're not getting it. You're not hearing me.

You're okay.

You're playing the Forum. You got 20 girls who want to be with you.

You're so bad.

Your job is to live the fantasy other people only dream about.

Your woman's an animal!

22½.

All right, and here we are. Thanks, Mats.

Are you famous? No, we're nobody. Sorry.

Are you leaving me? No. I'm not leaving you.

Are you okay? Yeah.

Are you serious? Of course I'm serious.

Are you two coming or what? Yeah. Sorry.

Arrest her for indecent exposure. Out of my jurisdiction, bro.

As if we give a toss. Just keep your dick away from me.

Awesome! What's your name?

Beautiful. Right between the eyes.

Bullshit. It doesn't matter.

Bye. Gotta run. Bye. Love you.

Can you get us in? I'm just trying to get in myself.

Chris, I need to talk to you You can't call me that here.

Chris, so how was the show? It was fine.

Classy. Like father, like son.

Cocksuckers! That would be you, Bobby.

Come on, girls. This way. See you, Chris.

Come on. Saved again. Should take her to work.

Coming to my show in a week? Of course.

Did you see all the people? I know. Just breathe.

Do you dance at Chubbies? No.

Do you want some? No, I'm good. I just had breakfast.

Don't forget. Oh, I won't.

Don't get Izzy.

Don't think I'm coming back. I don't.

Emily, wait. What? What?

Everything all right? Couldn't be better.

Female officers handle that crowd. You want to go?

Get a haircut. Okay, Satan's allegiant.

Get out of here, pig! God Fucking

Get up. I am not freezing my balls

Go now. I can't.

Good one. Did they do Black Babylon?

Great. Theo, from the top.

Have fun. You too. Be careful.

Have you seen Emily? How you doing?

He's doing interviews. lnterviews? Okay.

Hello, Chrizzy. How are you guys?

Hey, Izz. What's up?

Hey! Hang on. No hands. No hands.

Hit him in the bollocks. That wraps it up for tonight.

How are you? Good. How's Willard?

How was l? So good. So comfortable.

I ask you, did they not rock? They totally rocked.

I didn't say anything. You didn't have to.

I don't think so. Mom!

I gotta piss. What? You gotta piss?

I know you and A.C. do most of it Not most. All of it.

I love you, babe. I love you.

I love you. You do this every time.

I messed up my accent. It was great.

I thought I was. You weren't.

I thought it'd be a goof. A goof?

I thought we're having a great time. We are. It has been fun.

I want five. Five eggs.

I wanted to tell you. I know.

I'll be back to check on you. I'm sure you will.

I'll go with you. Go with me where?

I'm all right. Fantastic! Keep going!

I'm gonna ride with Emily. Oh, no. Sorry. You can't do that.

I'm in a band. Okay? Oh, okay.

I'm not taking it off. Come on.

If it isn't Yoko Ono and the Fag Five. What are you doing?

In you go. Nice. What's the P stand for?

Is it numb? I think so.

Is that all you brought? My manager.

It has been. You cut your hair. So did you, asshole.

It is. I know. I see that.

It's because I'm gay, isn't it? You're gay?

Just meet me at the hotel. I'm going to Seattle.

Keep him out! All right, he's gone.

Kim was a guy? Yeah, Kim was a guy.

Let go of my cape. Let go of my cape!

Let me get that. That doesn't work.

Let's do it. Here we go.

Let's go. Get up. Get out of here.

Look at that. See the dragon?

Marci and I have been talking Who's Marci?

Mats, get us the tequilas, will you? Ladies, you're on.

Maybe you've heard of us. I don't have time.

Maybe. Come on. Let's do yours.

Missed your cue. Yeah, sorry, K

My favorite color is rainbow. Mine's mauve.

Nice way to handle that pussy line. I can't argue with him.

No way! That's right. That's my boy.

No, I can't. I don't think so.

No, I'm not wasted. I'm tired. Sorry.

No, it's personal.... Personal friend.

No, sir. You have no idea what it takes.

No. Yes, you do.

No. Go on back, darling. I'm Izzy's brother.

Oh, man. This is insane.

Oh, my pass. VIP. Sorry.

Okay. Here. Hair of the dog.

Only one leaving is you. Chris, see these?

Sit and spin. Dude, just relax.

So how are we doing? Lovely. Thank you very much.

Some crazy stuff happens. Oh, my God, it's amazing.

Sounds just like the tape, man. No. Raunchier.

Stop it! Tell him to get out!

Sure you want to do this? Yeah, Bobby did it last week.

Take it. Yeah, I will.

Tell no one about this. Yes, sir.

That is pathetic that you know. I love that song.

That's it? Yeah. Very nice. Thanks.

That's it. That's a ping, not a squeal.

That's my amp! Do not ruin this concert! Do not!

That's my boy! That's my baby!

That's my boy. Come on, you guys.

The laws of gravity no longer apply. I guess not.

Then you know when I'm done. I'm leaving.

True. Be yourself, Chris.

Up you go. All right, Mats.

Used to be my room. Not anymore!

Want to hand out fliers? Absolutely.

Want to see how a real man Don't touch her.

We're a tribute band. No, dude. We are a cover band.

We're going to Seattle to When did you do this?

We're going to Seattle to When did you do this?

We're having breakfast. Keep him out!

Well, that's because I'm not. Good.

Well, you should be! Oh, thank you. Bye.

What are you doing here? Bradley's our new front man.

What do you mean? A.C. and I wrote them during break.

What do you mean? Chris, please.

What's going on? His wife ran off with Peter Gabriel.

What's going on? I don't know.

What's up, A.C.? Let the chick go, man.

What's up, Izz? What's up?

What's up? Long time.

What's up? What's he doing here?

What's with your eyebrow? Isn't it cool?

Who are you? Izzy.

Who is this? This is Kirk Cuddy.

Who? Izzy's girlfriend/manager.

Yeah, right. She's okay. She's all right.

You could work on your lip synch. I don't lip synch.

You didn't eat. Later. I love you guys.

You do know this song? Yes, sir.

You don't know. Nina and Samantha say he's leaving.

You forgot. No.

You guys look awesome. Bye.

You okay? Couldn't be better.

You running for pink slips? See you in hell, Bat Boy.

You said that! Shut up, Bradley.

You sure? Yeah, I'm sure.

You want a piece of me? No, I'm good.

You're firing me? Calm down.

Your pants. Emily had them made for me.

... when he walked offstage.

...a Steel Dragon tribute band, the best in Pittsburgh.

...and all the fucking talent that was in this band just left.

...and his physical therapist.

...and I admire it in some small way...

...and I don't care if I see that bastard again.

...aren't allowed on the bus.

...as the band tries to maintain its status...

...as the industry's top hard rock act.

...but I wanted to get your input before I went further.

...finally it wears you down. Then you crack.

...first time I laid eyes on you...

...for letting us use their place of business to pay tribute...

...heavy enough to pull this off and we found a star.

...I was married.

...if you want to stay with Steel Dragon...

...is not the message I want to send out.