Good Morning, Vietnam Soundboard Edit

A bar brawl that's one cronauer

A bird

A conviction on a charge of treason against the united states carries with it penalties kinda on the stiff side if you know what I mean

A friend

A khaki eclipse

A little conference here wilk a little conference time out everyone

A little of this whoo whoo whoo

A little too young for you

A lot of people went to the mat for you

A man does not refer to pat boone as a beautiful genius if things are all right

A man with limp damaged hair but nevertheless a fireball

A very well hung chihuahua

Absolutely not

Actually it's a ray conniff featurette three maybe four back to back ray conniff classics

Actually what I am sir is your armed forces radio saigon assistant who's in charge of orientation and billeting of enlisted personnel and company clerk

Adrian

Adrian cronauer gis a wacky and welcome addition

Adrian cronauer is on temporary assignment and i'll be filling in until he arrives hopefully sometime this morning

Adrian cronauer is on temporary assignment but boy do I have a surprise for you

Adrian it's not going exactly well there's a water buffalo jackknifed up there

Adrian take care of yourself

Affirmative sir

Affirmative sir good

Afrs radio is owned and operated by the united states government and operates on an assigned carrier frequency of 540 at 749 megahertz

Afvn better than afvd which means you have to get a quick shot

Again we've got our friend from military intelligence

Aha! earl oh you again no more fighting okay

Ahem excuse me

Airman cronauer

Airman cronauer requesting you to elaborate sir

Airman you know the rules

All of a sudden well I got drunk all of a sudden I went for a tattoo next thing you know i'm on a fucking truck what happened

All right

All right all right cool

All right gentlemen I don't know oh my god these lips my god they're moving i'm gonna flap my eyebrows to death

All right guys let's say goodbye to the radio star! we're out of here

All right in saigon today according to official sources nothing actually happened

All right let's see

All right this is adrian cronauer i'm on at 6 00 and again at 4

All right where are you from

All right! thank you

All the news that's new and approved by the u s army the sweetest smelling army in the world

Also elizab queen elizabeth liz elizabeth taylor elizabeth taylor

Also gina lollobrigida has been declared the italian national mountain range

Also the pope decided today to release vatican related bath products an incredible thing yes it's the new pope on a rope that's right pope on a rope wash with it go straight to heaven

Am I being fairly clear

Am I being fairly clear (2)

American personnel can check out a book in ku bai da nang phung tao saigon bien hoa and san treng

An incredible coincidence

An loc and cronauer would definitely be going along

An loc his pass say an loc

An loc shit

And as far as polkas they are a much maligned musical taste

And don't say that the weather is the same all the time here because it's not in fact it's 2 degrees cooler today than yesterday

And for trusting you is the best of the gently of what you say of never to be for both the same and another

And I literally think that you owe it to all of them to get your ass back on the air

And i'd like to get to know all of you by having you write down your name address your home and work phone on a piece of paper and passing it forward

And i'm not used to girls being that quiet unless they're medicated

And i'm stupid enough to save your bullshit life at an loc

And if you do and if you do

And if you do happen to speak with him please be polite and to the point at all times

And my older brother who be 29 years old he dead

And now an item of special note

And now direct from crete welcome the silky smooth sound of airman adrian cronauer

And now here are the headlines

And perhaps some night we could maybe get together and swap humorous stories for fun yeah

And stop calling them gals cowgirls are called gals those are gorgeous french vietnamese b girls

And the stones oh you like mick jagger

And the troops they love him

And there's a man who's screaming out to be made fun of

And this is just radio

And this one is brought to you by our friends at the pentagon remember the people who brought you korea

And we wish you good luck and success

And well comedy is a kind of hobby of mine

And what about jimmy wah's

And which marx brother would that be private zeppo

And who gave anyone permission to program modern music

And yet this boy can get in and out without a scratch

And you have to get on the air

And you wanna take the ball

And you you are not funny but you are a maniac and you'd better start changing your life

Andy williams perry como and certain ballads by mr frank sinatra

Antics damn it comedy of errors like the keystone kops falling down

Any food on this street that doesn't give you diarrhea

Anything! just play it loud okay

Anyway he's the man that you don't want to aggravate

Anyway there's this guy from the 1st battalion 2nd infantry who swore that he could get him naked photographs of the actor

Are asked to drop a card to major gerald kleiner over at the 5th

Are you always this happy

Are you crazy I might

Are you planning sir to take some of the marijuana home back to the united states how would you do that by plane by helicopter and also by automobile

Arf! easy girl easy

Arranging rakes by sizes for my mom in the garage

As I leave vietnam today there is no doubt certainly in my mind whether the vietcong will be defeated and that this war will be won

As soon as possible

Ask for the books by author title and subject and your selections will be mailed to you

At ease

At ease (2)

At ease hell we already are

Attention shoppers people people settle

Ba muy ba beer best beer in vietnam ba muy ba beer only beer in vietnam

Baby help me please

Back again

Basically it's hotter than a snake's ass in a waggon round up

Basically we talk hey man what's happening

Be my guest

Beach boys those were guys

Because basically I believe that that man is a misunderstood genius

Big fucking deal

Bikes we'll buy bikes

Black man's going it's just for the tip that's all I need is the tip

Bob fliber!

Bob likes a big room sir

Bob what do you do

Bookworms headquarters support activities saigon operates libraries at six locations in the republic of vietnam

Boston

Boston you know who sang the song my guy

Break the goddamn door down

Britain imposed an oil embargo on rhodesia today after that country's unilateral declaration of independence

Brother striker thank you brother striker

Bullshit

Bullshit! listen no more games okay

But can you tell me what it feels like

But facts are facts

But he left a farewell message for all you guys out there still sweating it out in the fields

But hey I like the class so i'm gonna stay

But I can easily play an occasional gary lewis record

But I warn you you not like it when you get there you say it ridiculous

But if you toy with me i'll burn you so bad you'll wish you died as a child

But it doesn't mean we can't have a few laughs

But not before his humor cost the lives of three very fine individuals

But regardless of what you read airman the department of defense wants final say

But vietnam ladies not friends

By the food and flower vendors where you burn your mouth on the noodles

Bye bye bye

Call me crazy he's in rome

Call me in five minutes

Call police quick

Can we have is there a psychiatrist here

Can we please not get into this right now you're in the middle of a show

Can we try my boyfriend's back anybody

Can we try that one

Can you believe the shape of those gals girls

Can you envision some fairly unattractive alternatives

Can you give me a minute

Can you tell us what you've found out about the enemy since you've been here

Can't let you do that

Can't see dick like hunting with ray charles

Careful you could put an eye out with that

Carry on montesque carry on

Chaperons

Check it out

Cleveland obviously vietnam's not that much of a change for you then

Come on

Come on come on

Come on guess again

Come on it's cursing class you're getting a little pissed off what would you do

Come on let me buy you a beer

Come on let me buy you a couple of beers how about it

Come on pal we'll make it

Come on sir

Come on sir in a couple of weeks this'll be easy for you

Come on take some chances once in a while edward that's what life's all about

Come on you're on in like two seconds

Comedy no no this is not comedy comedy is fun it's antics hysterical type things

Comedy sir

Cretan camouflage if you wanna blend into a crowd of drunken greeks there's nothing better

Cronauer

Cronauer i'm sorry as hell about this thing

Cut that thing off I said cut it off

Da nang me da nang me why don't they get a rope and hang me

Dan levitan

Dan levitan you've probably heard my radio show

Definitely wouldn't work on radio sir

Dick i've covered for you a lot of times because I thought you was a little crazy but you're not crazy you're mean

Didn't have to pick up the phones until he comes back

Didn't I speak to you before

Didn't know they had balls

Didn't we meet last year at the feinman bar mitzvah

Didn't we meet last year at the peninsula club

Didn't you ever wonder why you were pulled out just moments before the whole place blew up

Didn't you hear I cannot find you unless you talk to me

Do you ever wonder how a young south vietnamese boy gets into and out of vc held territory

Do you have any idea how ridiculous it makes me look to have a man under my command start a fucking bar brawl

Do you really expect me to run this radio station with nothing to say and no way to do it

Do you think he looks like a negative of little richard or am I crazy really and that hair

Does that road have a secure status

Don't build him up you'll let them down

Don't disappoint your

Don't do this shit

Don't get crazy over this dick

Don't get me wrong he seems like a nice guy but my father's nice and he's not funny either

Don't go near there get away from the river stay away from there

Don't help and don't smooth

Don't ruin it by conjuring up images of dale evans all right

Don't worry about it it'll go great this way sir

Don't you understand dick

Due respect sir

E g hey hauk eat a bag of shit you suck

Earl earl earl

Eat

Eat I can't it's still paddling

Eddie kirk here and ray conniff jubilee coming up in just a few moments

Edward don't you ever do anything that's not by the book

Edward please that's two nasty words in one year

Edward stay with me on this

Either of our names earl he calls everybody earl

Enemy what is enemy

Ethel merman jams russian radar

Ethel merman today uses a test to jam russian radar

Even encapsulated in two seconds my life is dull I find that very alarming

Even saying that means I don't know dick

Every gi in this country is glued to his radio twice a day at 0600 hours and 1600 hours to hear that lunatic

Everybody say gook but it's all right

Everybody time to get up get up wherever you are

Excuse me can I help you

Excuse me sir

Falling down that's a sight gag how would anyone see you fall down in the radio sir

Feels like the mouseketeers show annette cubby roy

Find anything

Fine

Fine just don't let it happen again

Fire 4 there's a fire in the landing on the outside of the building

First of all don't make fun of the weather here

First our fashion report from special forces sgt ernest lee sincere

First thing i'd like to know is what subject this is

First we have to have a little strenght training

Five months in saigon my best friend turns out to be a vc

Flip them a bird!

Flip them the bird

Fool it's hot I told you were you born on the sun it's damn hot

For crying out loud man this isn't brain surgery