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Home > Talladega Nights: The Ballad of...
Warning: This soundboard may contain objectionable content, and is Not Safe For Work (NSFW)
A car it handled real good
A lot of big stories and some big questions here at talladega
A single plop one single plop
Abracadabra homes
Absolutely ma'am i'd love to sign your baby you're not gonna wanna wash that forehead you hear me
Absolutely we're gonna do that
After the race
Ah ricky bobby
All right
All right (2)
All right (3)
All right all right hold on
All right baby come on now
All right fellas let's go
All right fellas you heard the man get the car off let's go you guys heard it
All right girard I found you now let's see where this goes
All right go get them
All right i'll hold your hair
All right i'll see you out there
All right i'll talk to you tomorrow
All right lucius time to let the cougar loose
All right man talk to you tomorrow
All right now you boys listen up and you listen good
All right professor dickweed what's the plan
All right way to go go way to go
All right well I tell you what we gotta do since we got no corporate money we have to build this damn engine ourselves
All right you did it back off
All right you got me that's an awesome nickname
All right you let go of me you formula one jazz nutjob!
All those races I won that was for you you know that I did just like you told me if you ain't first you're last
All three people all great champions all loved
Also due to a binding endorsement contract that stipulates I mention powerade at each grace
Also I got my balls back behind the wheel of a car
Also wanna thank you for my best friend and team mate cal naughton jr who's got my back no matter what
Always remember if you ain't first you're last
Am I on fire i'm on fire
Am I right
Amazing six different kinds swiss havarti what was the other one gouda cheddar gouda
Anarchy #anarchy #talladega nights #ricky bobby
Anarchy! anarchy! anarchy! anarchy!
Anarchy! I don't even know what that means but I love it!
And across from monsieur def is breeze
And at the end of the day you know you gotta be happy
And at the opposite end of the grid darrell ricky bobby
And at the urging of ricky bobby who's been like a son to me only better
And check out his crew chief over there won the nobel prize for physics back in '93
And death was coming for him and he stood there and with a tear coming out his eyes he said tell ricky win for me
And down and down and
And here you sit thinking
And I know you won the race but you're not gonna live forever
And I would be delighted reese if you would accompany me to ballroom dancing on tuesday nights
And I would be honored if you'd sign my balls
And i'm also gonna need to know where your commode's at
And i'm cal naughton jr
And i'm cal naughton jr (2)
And i'm in the front row and i'm hammered drunk
And if I remember correctly your daddy used to love it
And it ain't nothing more goddamn frightening than driving with a live cougar in the car
And it's shake and bake time
And knew that no matter what happened my boys my mama and my lady would love me
And most importantly we thank you for bringing back our nasty delinquent pot dealing daddy to us for he was lost but now he is found amen
And mr dennit told me that it's my time now
And next to him is hip hop artist poet and my brother in law mos def
And nobody can hang with my stuff
And now the matador shall dance with the blind shoemaker
And of course my red hot smoking wife carley who is a stone cold fox
And order the same stuff
And ricky bobby wins with cal naughton jr finishing second
And so then I got a marketing job with nascar
And soixante neuf you know the 69 with the head near the that bit we came up with it
And that night in the ladies' room of the rustler steak house he chose me
And that's what you need to do you don't need to think you need to drive
And the 26 car just ran naughton into the wall
And the first thing you gotta learn if you're gonna be a racecar driver is you don't listen to losers like your know it all teacher overe here
And then the next thing I gotta do is I just gotta have a sit down with carley and just let her know that it's okay for her to seek the comfort of other men
And then when that fear rises up in your belly you use it and you know that fear is powerful because it has been there for billions of years! and it is good and you use it and you ride it
And there goes ricky bobby on the outside!
And we just came up with a new nickname
And we look forward to powerade's release of mystic mountain blueberry
And y'all that's pretty much in a shell what it's like to manage a waffle house
And you always have to prove yourself why
And you don't win for anybody else you win for you you know why because a man takes what he wants he takes it all and you're a man aren't you aren't you
And you know what else you never let me win one time
And you need to grab hold of the line between speed and chaos and you need to wrestle it to the ground like a demon cobra
And you're hanging out at your mom's that's awesome
And your sponsors weren't doing very much so well we repainted the car
Answer me this when you're in spa mode how come the water level drops in the spa
Apparently we've got a situation for the laughing clown number 26 car
Applebee's has rats! I found a whole rat in my cobb salad!
Are they the really thin pancakes
Are you faking it fake it!
Are you feeling anything now i'm feeling a little bit
Are you in the hot tub
Are you kidding me
Are you serious
Are you there god it's me margaret
As a sign of humility if you kiss me on the lips now I will return to paris and you will never see me again in nascar
As it stands now jean girard is sitting on the pole which is of course a statement of fact and in no way a comment on the driver's sexual orientation
As the laps wind down jamie mcmurray is the leader
As william blake wrote the cut worm forgives the plow
As you know bill he's been doing that all year
As you wish
Attaboy all right son drive
Baby he's not gonna come to the wedding
Baby photo op photo op come on come on number one
Baby shoot i'm so sorry I really I didn't want it to be this way
Baby stop
Baby that is real good talk like we practiced last night
Baby this is ted beamen from halliburton over here is dick tangfield from dynacorp and back there is
Baby! that's my baby!
Be back to check on you in a minute thank you
Be thoughtful glenn
Bean buffet in front of it it was awesome
Because i'm your daddy that's why
Because i've really moved on
Because the drivers that finished first and second got out of their cars they have officially been disqualified
Because you know she's gotta run wild you can't keep something like that back
Beer money huh there you go yes
Before each race jean girard spends time with his world class horses who are also gay
Besides dennit jr must be freaking out all the money he's losing without me on the track
Bobby and girard are dueling each other for the lead
Bobby moves to the outside not a lot of room he's in the wall! bobby is sliding slamming into the wall
Bobby working really hard to pass the wonder bread car
Bobby's boxed in there's nowhere to go there
Bodies that look so good you're gonna wanna talk to it
Bon so what if you just said I love really thin pancakes that is a fair compromise no
Bootleggers in prohibition had to have cars fast enough to outrun the feds then they started racing each other
Boy that halliburton halliburton's taken off haven't they
Boy you are a terrible driver no
Boys how was school today
Break it pepe le pew
But before I can do that
But before I can do that I must be beaten by a driver who's truly better than me
But he did give you a pretty decent out but it's your call
But how did he get down to his underwear that fast
But I just wanted you to know that if you could hear me if it got into your brain somehow that I spread my butt cheeks as mike honcho
But i'm not even sure he even knows where he's at right now
But maybe just maybe you might challenge me
But something looks wrong I mean he's running around like he's on fire
But this is my life this is my life
But today he gets to strap back into a racecar for the first time since to try to show he can still get the job done
But we all need to go along with this because he's in a delicate state
But what about you how have you been what have you been doing
But you have forced me to do this
But you're a grown man you're delivering pizzas on a bike
By the way don't try and snort these lucky charms reese
By the way ricky I watched the highlander movie it was shit
Bye kids i'll see you next weekend
C'est fini au revoir ricky au revoir
C'est la vie and que sera sera
Cal do you realize the implications of your actions right now
Cal how could you do this to me man
Cal I don't like the way you're talking out there
Cal I love you
Cal naughton
Cal naughton from dennit racing just helped a rival driver pass a teammate
Cal naughton in second
Cal naughton!
Cal you could say that 10000 times and it still wouldn't be enough
Cal you're number one!
Calm piece of cake
Can I just have a little refresher of course baby
Can we get these guys something
Can you believe that he would do that for his teammate set him up that way
Can you feel it I can!
Can you not see why i'm stuck on the anger bridge
Can you speak up ricky
Can't believe it now i've seen everything
Carley come back here
Check it it was a nacho fountain with six kinds of cheese on it
Chimichanga mexican
Chinese food that's from china
Chip i'm all jacked up on mountain dew
Chip i'm gonna come at you like a spider monkey
Chip you brought this on man
Christmas is right around the corner and what better gift to give a loved one than the jackhawk 9000 available at wal mart
Come back at him it's the only way
Come face your destroyer listen to how I sound I sound like a massive prick
Come face your destroyer!
Come here come here
Come here you make me hot come here
Come on baby
Come on baby! yeah that's it
Come on come on
Come on dad he's just a stupid cowboy look how bad he is in that interview
Come on dad!
Come on daddy! come on daddy! whoop his butt!
Come on frat boy you wanna go
Come on john pay attention
Come on man slingshot it slingshot come on
Come on man that was last week
Come on man!
Come on man! it's embarrassing
Come on son what's it gonna be speed or jail
Come on son you can do it come on
Come on we were doing good there man i'm taking care of your house good
Come on what kind of dude wears a thong
Come on you know what screw you man
Come on!
Coming up next it's ice dancing to the hits of motown
Cops are coming
Could you do that for me
Cross over the anger bridge
Cut around the meat
Dad where are you going
Dad you made that grace your bitch
Dad! (2)
Dad! come back dad!
Dad! why are you doing this
Damn I wish ricky was here
Damn it come on man
Damn it okay
Damn it!
Damn the torpedoes!
Damn you wavecrest!
Darrell you tell brian wavecrest to take out cal naughton right now
Dear 8 pound 6 ounce newborn infant jesus don't even know a word yet just a little infant and so cuddly but still omnipotent
Dear lord baby jesus lying there in your little ghost manger just looking at your baby einstein developmental videos learning about shapes and colors and
Dear lord baby jesus or as our brothers to the south call you jesus we thank you so much for this bountiful harvest of domino's kfc and the always delicious taco bell
Dear lord baby jesus we also thank you for my wife's father chip
Dear tiny infant jesus we
Dear tiny jesus in your golden fleece diapers with your tiny little fat balled up fists
Delightful to meet you mr robert I thought you were dead