Jennifer Lawrence Soundboard Edit

Are you fucking kidding me?

As I was getting ready for the show this afternoon, I suddenly got very nervous about hosting. But then I remembered the advice my mom gave me about overcoming stage fright. So I drank an entire box of Chardonnay and I feel much better.

Because I am so much crazier than you. I'm just the crazy slut with a dead husband.

Day I got a chest X-ray OK of my lungs and discovered that my breasts are uneven.

Did you wake me up?

Eye Roll #eye roll #jennifer lawrence #hunger games #ugh #yikes #negative #thumbs down #drama

I did my research.

I get nervous that I'm going to say something and then I'm nervous. I'm like, whoop, I better drink. That doesn't help.

I know it might be weird to see me up here. I am an MTV Best Kiss award winner, but I really am just a regular person. I don't get caught up at all those celebrity BS. I don't care that I've never been named People magazine's Most beautiful Woman in the world or that Julia Roberts has gotten it five times. I think there'd be like some kind of limit.

I said I'm tired. Are you gonna walk me home or what?

I was a big slut, but I'm not anymore. There's always going to be a part of me that's sloppy and dirty, but I like that with all the other parts of myself. Can you say the same about yourself, fucker? Can you forgive?

It's a big night for you, Jennifer. But it's gonna be OK. You just have to relax, have fun, and don't say the F word. I can't say the F word, right? Unfortunately not.

My entire dress was unzipped and my thong was out.

Never. Speak on my behalf.

Oh hell no no.

Oh my God.

Sort of how you are. What do you mean how am I? What's happening? Sort of like me.

The questions, I say things like you are cute.

Well, what was the process? I don't know. I just woke up and tried on the dress and it fit, thank God. And and then I took a shower and. I don't know what I was. That's what I did. And then I got my hair and makeup done and then I came to the old screws.

What do you mean what happened? Look at my dress. I tried to walk upstairs in this dress. That's what happened.

When you make a serious commitment as somebody, it is not cool to not show up.

You are afraid to be alive. You are afraid to live. You're a hypocrite. You're conformist. You're a liar. I opened up to you and you judged me. You're an asshole. You're an asshole. Get off me. Get off. You're harassing me. He's harassing me.

You may not have experienced the shit that I did that you loved hearing about it, didn't you?

You think that I'm crazier than you?