Fight Club (1999) Soundboard Edit

A movie doesn't come all on one big reel. It comes on a few.

After you, Mr. Durden.

After you.

Ah, self improvement is masturbation

All night.

Ancient peoples found clothes got cleaner when washed in one part of the river.

And a few blocks will be reduced to smoldering rubble

And it started to make sense in a Tyler sort of way.

And right then, at our most excellent moment together...

And so it went.

And the eighth and final rule: if this is your first night at Fight Club,

And this is how I met the big moosie.

And we're very, very pissed off.

And when you look down, you'll see tiny figures pounding corn,

And you won't ever see me again.

And you're never really awake.

Anything.

Around the ruins of Rockefeller Center.

Aw, come on! Don't go!

Back! All of you!

Bob loved me because he thought my testicles were removed too.

But I didn't.

But this is too much. I don't want this.

Chloe's dead.

Congratulations. You're one step closer to hitting bottom.

Cool.

Cornelius!

Cornelius? Rupert? Travis?

Deal.

Do not fuck with us

Do you understand that?

Even if I could tell someone they had a good fight,

Even the Ryslampa wire lamps of environmentally friendly unbleached paper.

Every week, Tyler gave the rules that he and I decided.

Everywhere I went, I felt I'd already been there.

Except for their humping,

Excuse me. Are you there?

Feel better, champ.

Fifth rule: one fight at a time, fellas.

Fight Club wasn't about winning or losing.

Fine.

First, you have to give up.

First, you have to know not fear

For a second, I forget about Tyler's controlled demolition thing

For six months, I couldn't sleep.

Fourth rule: only two guys to a fight.

Franklin Street?

From when the police, or whoever, kicked it in.

Get away from me! Drop that fucking knife!

Go ahead... Cornelius.

Goddamn!

Ground zero.

He did this every six years.

He never wanted you. In all probability, he hates you.

Hey, this is getting a little old!

Hey, wait!

Hold it right there! Shut up!

How's this for not making a big thing?

I am Jack's inflamed sense of rejection.

I am smart, capable and, most importantly, I'm free in all the ways that you are not.

I am the leader of a terrorist organization

I am trying to protect you!

I asked you not to do that!

I come in last night. Phone's off the hook. Guess who's on the other end

I couldn't sleep...

I didn't even mind the warm, stale refrigerator.

I didn't hurt you, did I?

I didn't know how,

I didn't know if he owned it or was squatting.

I don't wanna hear anything you have to say.

I hadn't slept in four days.

I look around, I look around, I see a lot of new faces.

I ran

I should have been looking for a new condo,

I showed this to my man here. You liked it, didn't you?

I tried not to think of the words searing or flesh

I wanted to open the dump valves on oil tankers

I was always just one step behind Tyler.

I was swimming in the Caribbean

I was the warm little center that the life of this world crowded around

I wasn't really dying.

I went to all the cities on Tyler's used ticket stubs, bar hopping.

I'd be very, very careful who you talk to about that.

I'd been here for two months and his door was never closed.

I'd never been in a car accident.

I'll say this about Marla. At least she's trying to hit bottom.

I'll take the blood, but I want brain dementia

I'm going to my cave to find my power animal.

I'm grateful to you for everything that you've done for me.

I'm really OK

I'm sorry?

If I see where you're going, you won't be safe.

If X is less than the cost of a recall, we don't do one

In the back, buried in the garden, you'll find the body of Robert Paulsen.

In the empty car pool lane of some abandoned superhighway.

In the industry, we call them cigarette burns.

In this house to her or anybody, we're done.

Investigators are on the scene. The Police Commissioner has arrived.

It used to be that when I came home angry or depressed, I'd just clean my condo.

It was worth every penny.

It's a bridesmaid's dress.

It's getting exciting now.

It's under control, sir.

Listen up, maggots.

Little by little, you're just letting yourself become...

Look at me!

Look at my face, Bob.

Look, nobody takes this more seriously than me. That condo was my life

Losing all hope was freedom.

Marla

Might make a good anti smoking ad

My insurance is probably gonna cover it, so...

My parents pulled this exact same act for years.

Never mind

No one will have sex with me.

No, wait! Don't change the subject! I want to talk about this.

No, wait. Back up. Let me start earlier.

No! Don't pull it.

Now it was the Horchow collection.

Now, this is not as easy as it sounds.

Oh, fuck! Somebody called the cops.

Oh, God, no! Please! No!

Oh, God. Why are you doing this?

Oh, heavens, no. Not the green one.

Oh, yeah!

OK

OK!

On a long enough time line,

On my mother's eyes

Once it mixed with the melted body fat, a soapy discharge crept into the river

One step closer to economic equilibrium.

Our great depression is our lives

Ow! Stop it!

Pick someone special to you tonight.

Please let us keep it, Lou! Please, Lou!

Pull any one but the green one.

Put the hose down.

Rain trickled down through the plaster and the light fixtures.

Raymond K Hessel. 1320 SE Banning, Apartment A.

Really?

Richest, creamiest fat in the world. The fat of the land!

See it swimming?

See it swimming?

See where the fat burned to the seat? The polyester shirt?

SFO. LAX

Share yourself, completely

She has lost faith in herself.

She's a predator posing as a house pet. Stay away

Shh!

Shit!

Shut up! Our fathers were our models for God.

Shut up! This is all over with!

Since when is Project Mayhem about murder?

Single serving sugar, single serving cream, single pat of butter.

Sixth rule: no shirts, no shoes.

So far, you have four. I only have two.

So special

So, we each have three. That's six.

So?

Someone yells stop, goes limp, taps out,

Sometimes, all you could hear were the flat,

Sooner or later, we all became what Tyler wanted us to be.

Sorry if there was a misunderstanding

Sorry.

Stop it! This is your pain, this is your burning hand.

Stupid because the answer's yes or because it's no?

Take the first and third Sunday of the month.

Tell him you blew it all up! That's what he wants to hear.

Thank God! Please don't hit me again.

Thank you for this. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

That aroma of old sweat, like fried chicken.

That gas could have slowly filled the condo

That hung enormous, the way you'd think of God's as big.

That old saying, how you always hurt the one you love,

That was not just a bunch of stuff that got destroyed.

That's fucking funny?

That's me. That's the toilet. Good?

That's pain.

That's three times you promised.

That's, um...

The condom, I mean. Not the stranger.

The father must've been huge.

The infant went through the windshield. Three points.

The liberator who destroyed my property realigned my perceptions.

The Paper Street Soap Company.

The salt balance has to be just right,

The second rule... Is this yours?

The victory in the war against crime will not come overnight.

The yardstick of civilization

Then I cried harder.

There are things about you I like. You're smart, funny, spectacular in bed.

There's a sign on the front that says Lou's Tavern.

They don't have the courage you have to just run with it.

This is lye. The crucial ingredient.

This kid from work, Ricky,

This might be someone you've known for years.

This was a support group for men with testicular cancer.

This was my vacation.

Three minutes. This is it.

Tinsel still clinging to it.

Tomorrow will be the most beautiful day of Raymond K HesseI's life

Tonight... we make soap

Try this trick and spin it

Try this trick and spin it

Tyler Durden

Tyler went away

Tyler, you are by far the most interesting single serving friend I've ever met.

Tyler's words coming out of my mouth

Ugh! Agh!

Us?

Want to say a few words for the occasion?

Way out in the water

Way out in the water

We are all part of the same compost heap...

We had it all worked out, sir

We had the same suitcase?

We were selling rich women their own fat asses back to them

Welcome!

Well, that's a relief. Thank you.

Well, then, it suits you

Wet inside from so many people sweating and breathing.

What are we doing tonight?

What are you talking about?

What comes next in Project Mayhem only Tyler knows

What did you think was gonna happen?

What do you want? Your shit job back? Fucking condo world, watching sitcoms?

What is this?

What?

What... Son of a bitch!

What's that smell?

Whatever else happens, I've got that sofa problem handled.

When they told me east is west

Where have you been the last eight weeks?

Who are you?

Who do you think I am?

Why does a weaker person need to latch on to a strong person? What is that?

With her... with her new husband.

With many cells capable of operating independent of central leadership.

With your constant absenteeism?

Wouldn't do that. Not unless I knew which wires were what.

Yeah, I know.

Yeah!

Yeah.

You are not a beautiful or unique snowflake.

You are not special.

You are the all singing, all dancing crap of the world.

You created me. I didn't create some loser alter ego to make me feel better.

You do not talk about Fight Club!

You had to give it to him.

You kids!

You know that chest expansion program on late night TV?

You met me at a very strange time in my life.

You said you would definitely say that.

You step inside your cave and you walk..

You wake up at Air Harbor International.

You wanna know if I think we were just having sex or making love?

You wanna make an omelet, you gotta break eggs.

You!

You'll create total chaos.

You'll wear leather clothes that will last you the rest of your life.

You're not the car you drive.

You're standing at the entrance of your cave.

You're the worst thing that ever happened to me

Your feet are on the air and your head on the ground

and lubricants and amyl nitrite. Thank you, Chloe.

Come on! Not good enough.

Do not fuck with us! Say it.

Don't shut the pain out. Oh, God!

Enemies? I reject civilization,

Euch! How could Tyler not go for that?

Fucking use the basement! Christ! I want your word, Lou! I want your word!

Get him to a fucking hospital. Yeah.

Get the fuck out of here. You're fired! I have a better solution.

He's a great man. Oh...

Hey, come on. I'm in pain. You wanna see pain?

Hey, guys. Hey.

Hit me again. No, you hit me

How did you know? They give shitty apartments letters.

How much money does he get? There is no money.

However... I gotta take a piss.

I beg you, please don't do this. I'm not doing this. We are doing this.

I don't understand this. You wanted a way to change your life.

I'll expose you. Go ahead. I'll expose you.

Is that it? Stop!

Is this about you and me? Yeah. Weren't we doing this together?

It'll set quite an example. You're making a big mistake!

It's time you left. Don't worry, I'm leaving.

Look at me. No. What?

Maybe we should exchange numbers. Should we?

Miss Singer, let us help you! She's a monster!

My God. Who did this? A person.

No, no. I got one for you.

No. But that's a good thing. You can't know yourself if you haven't.

Nobody knows what he looks like. He has plastic surgery every three years.

Oh! What?

Practicing what? Telling me off.

Really? It's for men only.

Right there? Mm.

Stop fighting! Where's the rubber band?

What are we, then? I dunno. Consumers

What are you doing? Just going to bed.

What are you reading? Listen to this.

What do you do? What do you mean?

Why is it free of charge? Don't ask.

Yeah. Why? Who would you fight? I'd fight my dad.

You have jobs, a life. You work nights because you can't sleep.

You're not into her, are you? No! God, not at all