Main Content
Sound Added to Your Favorites Soundboard
Error Adding Sound
Error adding sound to your favorites.
Sound Reported
Sound reported and our moderators will review it shortly.
Error Reporting Sound
Error reporting sound. Please use the Contact page.
Home > Major Payne Soundboard
1,501 9,698
Major Payne Soundboard

Major Payne Soundboard

Major Payne is a 1995 American military comedy film directed by Nick Castle and starring Damon Wayans. It is a loose remake of the 1955 film The Private War of Major Benson, starring Charlton Heston. The film co-stars Karyn Parsons, Steven Martini and Michael Ironside.
See also: Nick Castle, Damon Wayans, Max Payne, Orlando Brown (actor), Karyn Parsons.

NSFW Audio: Use caution, some sounds may be offensive
Apparently he pissed all over the front of his pants.
Can’t Feel My Legs #major payne #bubba #no legs #they aint there #missing legs
Change my name to Big Daddy pain.
Chugging along #little engine that could #chugga chugga #toot toot #train engine #grinding #onward
Cut a little rug #major payne #dance #robot #damon waynes #hillary
Did I give you permission to sneeze open?
Doughboy #major payne #doughboy #poke #stomach #pudgy #doughy #chubby
From now on, my little group, my scrolling thanks you will strive to be like me. You will walk like me, talk like me, and until you win those games, you will be bald like me.
Gal, you an apology? You want me to take back some of those mean and hurtful little things? I said? OK, I'm sorry. You're just a little turd that can't hold your liquid out in public. Now you get o...
General, you're trying to tell me in all this man military, there's no room left for a trained weapon of destruction?
Greek, Greek, Greek, Greek, Greek. What are you laughing at, pig boy?
Have eight weeks to turn you gaggle of maggots into a well disciplined cadet JUnit from this day four. What? Y'all sorry, I didn't belong to me. You are not any sleep, drink, blow your nose or even...
Hello, kill balls. Welcome to the House of Pain.
I can't feel my legs #numb #spinal tap #epidural #drugged #high
I miss you little trick. The man have that out. You may you may feel a little fresh. Yeah. My finger, my finger. We'll give it to him.
I said hold it or I'll break that up and kick it around on the ground.
I will put my foot so far. Don't answer what on my knee will quench your thirst.
It's been two whole weeks since I killed me a man.
Laugh #laughing #hehe #haha #major payne
Let the boy grow up #pop your titty out his mouth #stop babying him #i didnt stutter
Maybe what he need is for you to pop your titty out his mouth and let the boy grow up.
Me Papa bum, what Beanstalk you fall from?
Nope, but I can clean your colon that quicker than one of them burritos with extra guacamole sauce.
Now what I'm gonna do it take this right foot and put it cordless side, your face.
One tubby tubby, two tubby tubby #situps #chubby #tubby #chunky #fat #overweight #major payne
Scream #bolt jump scares
Screaming #scream #scared #terrified
Sensitive #sensitive #major payne #damon wayans
Sir, yes sir! #sir yes sir #affirmative #obedience #obey #boot camp #major payne
What are you laughing at pig boy? #snorting laugh #pig boy #what are you laughing at #fatty #major payne
What are you lookin at, Ass Eyes? #what are you lookin at #ass eyes #major payne
What are you looking at at that something, Sir?
What the hell was that, you little freckle faced cartoon?
You gotta be somebody needs some killing.
You hold it turn.
You know you remind me of the dough, boy. If I poke, your stomach will make you go.
You know, answer me when I speak to you, I'm going to put my foot in your ass. Is that clear them in three.
You nasty little worm, go change your hugged boy and be back in front, though. Stop that crying. You'll get no pity from me. You think your tears will stop Charlie from taking advantage and sticky ...
You plottin on me boy? #plottin on me boy #scheming #manipulation #major payne
You want them, but they look in the dictionary between shit and syphilis.