Everybody Loves Raymond (1996) - Season 9 Edit

Ah, d****s.

All for some guy whose stomach

All right, you win!

All this time, l... I thought you were doing

All those little things to torture me.

And a swim cap.

And by the way, it's been 27 days, not 26.

And float around with the old ladies.

And for once it was you standing outside.

And generally troubled relationship.

And I say yes a lot!

And I've just had a lot on my mind.

And now instead of being mad

And she's not getting upset?

And the pajama rides up it?

And then he said something about

And then... and then first thing this morning,

And thinking of everything that I have to do the next day!

And yet it is!

Are we still doing that?

Are you toying with me?

Because if you are,

Because last night when Robert and I went to bed

Because she is weak...

Because...

But I got caught up in the game

But I was thinking that I'd still go.

But I'm a mess.

But no sale!

But really, I totally forgot.

But then I fell asleep.

But then I just kissed his neck and he said,

But you made me feel terrible about myself!

But, oh, man, who am I kidding?

Come on, come on!

Comes the power of "yes."

Debra can't keep her hands off me.

Debra dear,

Debra gave me the look again.

Debra, you're really upset about this.

Did you put oil on?

Do you know I did 138 situps this morning...

Drooped?

Even now... Iook at you,

Even when you sleep, every so often

Exactly. You say yes and you say no.

For the children to see what I was going to do to you.

For the last 10 years.

For the power!

From taking care of three kids all day

Getting me to beg for sex... that makes you feel good?!

Good morning!

Good night.

Good night.

Guess I was never really close to having the power, was I?

Ha! Ha!

Have I drooped?

He has been turning me down on purpose!

He says it inhibits him.

He thinks it gives him the upper hand or something.

He usually doesn't like to mention Ray in the bedroom.

He usually follows you around with his tongue hanging out.

He was acting kind of distant too.

Here, push that curtain over a little

Hey, but look on the bright side.

Hey, who gets to hit a bucket of balls in the middle of the day?

Hey, you guys can make breakfast yourselves, right?

Hey, you know what? They got a great hot dog guy there.

Hey, you let me be the one to watch your figure.

How about when you keep one of your legs outside of the covers

How could you do that to somebody?

How do you think that feels? You're looking at the president

How I could have all the power.

Huh? What?

Huh.

I am officially asking you

I believe they're satin. You wanna feel?

I came in this morning... she was making me a cheese omelet.

I can hardly keep my hands off you.

I can say no. I can say no.

I could too turn her down!

I didn't think it would be appropriate

I don't know why Robert had such a hard time putting them up yesterday.

I don't know, I'm just feeling...

I don't know. I'm always the one being shot down.

I don't think I'm gonna go hit balls today.

I ever wanted to have sex with you!

I finally know what it's like to be the one wearing the panties.

I guess I wanted to see what it was like

I hate that guy!

I just can't resist a man with so much power.

I just did three nights, Lady Pantaloons.

I just hope there's not a game on tonight.

I just... I got a lot of...

I know.

I like that.

I like the Southern thing.

I may go tomorrow because I can do whatever I want.

I mean, I can't believe it,

I mean, yeah, it had shells in it, but still...

I should just go with Marie to the "Y,"

I think Amy's saying

I think she just gave me the look.

I thought it meant gas.

I wanted them out of the house.

I wish he was,

I wish he was,

I wouldn't know about that.

I'll be right back.

I'm just gonna start to cry.

I'm not very good at it.

I'm serious. I don't know when I'll be in the mood again.

I'm sorry. I totally forgot.

I'm still gonna go, and you know what?

I'm sure it's not you.

I've been trying to make myself look better for him.

I've been waiting for this for a long time too, Ray.

I've got a lot to do.

If there's any material left over,

It felt good, her wondering where I was last night.

It still works.

It was weird.

It's amazing. It's like every time I turn her down,

It's been 26 days of doing it...

It's just I've been really busy, you know...

It's just my natural juices.

It's just pajamas.

It's like with the power of "no"

It's weird, though. It's weird.

Ladies and gentlemen, worst in show!

Last night I told her that I had a lot of work to do today.

Let me ask you something: Why do you always feel the need

Let me go look for an extra pair of nose clips

Like a dog with his tongue hanging out.

Like biting your lower lip when you use the remote to change the channel.

Listen, Ray, if I turn you down, it is because I am exhausted

Listen, Robert... he can't go hit balls,

Looks like a deflated clown balloon?

Maybe tomorrow.

Maybe... maybe I should

Me?

No no no, I don't. It's very right.

No no no!

No no, just a little stiff, that's all.

No no, that's just it.

No sex for you!

No sex for you.

No, I shouldn't. I gotta watch my figure

No, I want him alive.

No, I'm fine. It's just...

No, man, you're not getting it.

No! No, I don't know. I just...

No.

No.

No.

No.

Not doing it.

Nothing.

Of course we're still doing it.

Of the fat, ugly old ladies' club.

Oh my God, are those silk?

Oh my God, I can't believe

Oh my God!

Oh my God.

Oh my, how will I ever resist my baser instincts?

Oh, boy. You're gonna kill him, aren't you?

Oh, come on, you follow her around

Oh, gosh. Really, Deb?

Oh, I left the hallway light on.

Oh, I'll have to check and see if I'm free.

Oh, no. Why would he do that?

Oh, so it's a medical decision

Oh, we'll have a ball!

Oh, what, did the wife say you can't go?

Oh, yeah, I'm kind of beat.

Oh, yeah?

Oh, you do re...

Oh, you're threatening me with no sex? Please.

Oh.

Okay, last night I got the look

Okay, look, I'm really starting to feel a little uncomfortable...

Okay, well, good ni...

Okay? So we'll see who can't last.

Okay.

Okay.

Our not having sex thing!

Please. You expect me to believe that you didn't realize that we...

Put on a flowery swim cap

Ray keeps turning me down.

Really, Deb, I think...

Really?

Right now? I don't know.

Robe.

Say, why don't you come with us tomorrow?

Sex.

She does it better, okay?

She even brushed her teeth and everything,

She hasn't done that since before Ally was born.

She seems to want it more. She's like a guy.

She started hinting again.

She's been treating me better all day.

Sitting there in your...

So I stayed up to watch it instead of going upstairs.

So she doesn't take me for granted.

So we don't see his blood.

So what do you think, Deb?

So you were just toying with me?

Sorry.

Sorry. God...

Standing in the rain with your bad shirt and your acne pimples?

Still using the kids, huh?

Stop it, Deb. You look great.

Stuff...

Stupid.

That doesn't sound like him.

That face means sex?

That'll be good when you come back saying,

That's not funny.

That's not like you.

That's quite all right.

That's right, it's not,

That's why I should turn her down...

The next time you're getting sex from me.

The P.T.A. Fundraiser's coming up

The power of "no."

The worst part about this is that it worked.

There is no way I turned you down that much.

There is no way you can compare me turning you down

To be manipulative when it comes to sex?

To be the one being pursued for once.

To parade you around the park.

To please have some sex with me.

Try being rejected 40 or 50 times every year

Turn her down again, you know?

Two times, my friend!

Uh huh. For the first time in my marriage

Water aerobics at the "Y."

We live here.

We went 26 days without having sex?

Weak... for my physique.

Welcome! Have a donut!

Well, 'night.

Well, he can't handle normal sized tools

Well, I'll let you boys talk about your exciting sports.

Well, now you know how I feel!

Well, that's gross.

Well, you don't have to worry because I'm not sure

What are you doing?

What do you mean?

What do you mean?

What she's got here.

What, did you have my mom put your makeup on?

What?

What?

What? What are you doing?

What... what?

What's with all your lacy apparel?

When did you finally come to bed?

Where were you, man? Come on, let's go.

Which is why after sunset I avoid all eye contact.

While I prefer sex.

Who decides who gets in and who doesn't.

Whoa, wait wait.

Why don't you make yourself a little skirt?

Why would you do a silly thing like that?

Why you've been turning me down.

With those giant fingers.

With what you did to me!

With your hair like that,

Work!

Yeah yeah, I'm a little tired too.

Yeah yeah, well...

Yeah, and you couldn't take it.

Yeah, I know when Amy's in the mood,

Yeah, it's cold out there, isn't it,

Yeah, right!

Yeah, the game... it went into double overtime.

Yeah, they look great.

Yeah, well, I guess even when you're not trying,

Yeah, well, that's just the difference between me and you, Raymond:

Yeah, well, then maybe

Yeah, your tongue is the leash she uses

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yes, you're quite a catch.

Yet there still comes a day when everything just...

You already asleep?

You are always in the mood.

You can't turn her down.

You feel bad because I turned you down, what, three times?

You had me convinced I was a fat, ugly old lady!

You have a wrong

You haven't slept much lately, have you?

You just got a little of your power back.

You just kept rejecting me.

You kind of sigh a little.

You know how my friends and I keep fit?

You know what I've discovered?

You know, it's funny... you bringing this up,

You know? I mean, she's gotta appreciate

You know...

You like to golf by yourself and have a crappy omelet

You must be tired.

You thought I couldn't turn down Debra, right?

You try to work out and take care of yourself,

You want me to bring you back one?

You weren't even trying.

You will be saying "please"... "pretty please with sugar on top."

You wouldn't last a night.

You're being so quiet.

You're just so powerful.

You're making to stay here and...

You're... you're the bouncer in front of the disco

Your mother's got a look too,

26 days.

Did you catch the end of that game? Oh, it was amazing.

do I look different to you? What do you mean?

He did? Yeah.

Hey, Jimmyjack! Hey!

Hey, maybe he's sick. Nah.

Hey. Hey.

Hey. Good morning. Hey.

How was work? Good. Where are the kids?

Huh. What?

I do that? Yeah!

I sent them over to the Parkers. Why?

It was amazing. Oh.

It's just because I'm hot. Yes, you are!

member!

Morning, kids. What are you doing here?

No, come on. You know...

No. Yes.

Oh, don't those look nice? Yeah.

Ray. Eh?

See? All right

This means you're still hot. Of course I am!

What are you talking about? Our thing!

What do you mean? Sex? Yeah.

What things? Forget it.

What? I give up!

What's with you? Robert told Amy

What's with you? Robert told Amy

Yeah, sure, go. Have a good time. All right.

You're not very good at what? Oh, you name it.

...going on.

...help Amy pick out d****s.

'Cause Daddy has to talk to Mommy upstairs about something.

'Cause I thought you were coming right up,

'cause she always gives me this sexy little sideways smile.

'Cause... I thought we had plans.

"Hurry up and get it over with."

"Let me watch your figure"?

"Pretty please with sugar on top."

"Ray's crazy."

"The power of no"... give me a break.

"The power"? I mean, why would he...?