Schitt's Creek - Season 3 Edit

A big piece of fish.

A bold decision.

A cardboard box over there,

A cool $40 goes into our pockets.

A fresh batch of eggs for us volunteers.

A humble back story will disabuse this man

A little less on ourselves,

A little.

A lot of people have encouraged me

A lot of people might book a room if this goes through.

A pitiable creature, that's what she is.

A taste maker like you should be out there,

A toast!

A toast!

A ton of mushrooms.

A touch of celebrity, perhaps.

A vague physical resemblance,

A volume discount on paper products,

A weekend of golf,

A wish list project, lowest of priorities.

A word to the wise, okay?

A zippy little vintage something on budget.

About stuff.

About where she wanted to be scattered.

About where you are,

Absolutely crucial!

Absolutely crucial...

Act of desperation, it was simply just an act.

Actually, I was gonna ask if you could take this

Actually, we don't have time for that today.

After that whole thing last night.

Ah well, I'm a big juice fan myself.

Ah, never heard that one before.

Ah!

Ah! David: Oh my God!

Ah! Vivacity aside,

Ah! Yeah!

Ah...

Ah...

Aha, well, at first glance,

Ahem!

Ahem!

Ahh...

Alexis has a job,

Alexis seems to think you like me more.

Alexis was being held hostage in this week.

Alexis, I pay off my credit card bills

Alexis, I would be absolutely glee ridden

Alexis, if you don't wanna take the course,

Alexis, if you're gonna be in this class,

Alexis, we sent you to high school in Switzerland

Alexis: Oh God, David, this is so awkward!

Alexis: Ugh!

Alexis!

All in favor, say Aye.

All on your own?

All right, just soup, and a sandwich.

All right, let's forget the print outs.

All right, look guys, this is a big decision.

All right, ready to order?

All right, well, I'll drive you.

All right, you know what, I'm sitting at another table.

All right, you know what, Roland, I think...

All right? I just think...

All the wonders of which you are capable,

All those in favor of Christmas World?

Although I made some excellent points,

Although the things some of these customers

Always nice to put a face to the name.

Always ready.

American style toaster popping tart.

Amy... grace.

Amygrace, well, apologies.

An accounting course,

An adventurous little rendezvous

An afternoon outdoors, okay?

An elastic.

An extra star on our rating.

And a car says a lot about a person.

And a famous soccer player,

And a half a sandwich.

And a half a sandwich. Then what is that?

And a little more on the material.

And a stay at a luxurious motel.

And ah, helping... people.

And as a vet, that's not something

And as your assistant I will be discreet,

And be indoors for a change, yeah?

And brown toast, over easy,

And Cal's business is booming.

And check over the place, so...

And circle back.

And colored contacts lenses whenever you needed them.

And Council in particular,

And David and his family.

And definitely let us know when you've got that Jacuzzi.

And even more who could use

And eventually was killed.

And everyone could tell me like,

And everyone's talking about the dress.

And extreme juicing.

And far be it from me to rob you of your necessity!

And fill my basket with money for you!

And fraud. Yeah...

And good men always win!

And got...

And have paid very close attention to her battle

And he comes to your house, you pay him,

And he gives you your stuff.

And he'll most likely bring some younger friend.

And her glove.

And here is my answer.

And honestly, the drip is just uh, you know,

And I also took a couple for David.

And I appreciate that, but message has been delivered.

And I cannot be conducting business

And I don't even think I'll be able to take those courses,

And I don't know what I'm doing!

And I don't mean the kind of potatoes you eat,

And I have muffins for Twyla.

And I have my "F" Class.

And I heard those little elves they have running around,

And I just need to appear more um...

And I know it's early, but I'm kind of feeling like,

And I know Stevie's been feeling it a little bit, too.

And I know you have a soft spot for seersucker.

And I rarely offer to do things like this, so.

And I show you kitchen

And I think I might ask for a...

And I think it's...

And I think we should experience it to the fullest.

And I thought, that's not the Jocelyn I know.

And I was seven years old!

And I will drop off the flea shampoo for Ms. Warner's cat.

And I will get the dressing on the side, please.

And I'd say you'll understand one day,

And I'll have you know,

And I'll take the big one.

And I'm always the last person you turn to.

And I'm friends with you, so that's one major difference.

And I'm giving you special price.

And I'm perfectly capable of handling this.

And I'm running low on fungal cream, so...

And I'm sorry if that rubs you the wrong way,

And I'm sure you'll have a really good time.

And I'm the one who's supposed to lead these meetings,

And I'm very anxious about it.

And I'm we're gonna just...

And I've got a steak sandwich here with your name on it.

And if she can get let's say,

And if they're not, I'll be sure to scatter

And if this works,

And if those happen to be my hands, then...

And if you would just pop the old tush...

And if you'd just let me finish the pitch

And it cost twice as much as the car you wanna buy.

And it snows inside all day long.

And it took him like, 16 tries to get it last time.

And it was an historic landmark.

And it would've been a lot less,

And it's not me!

And its all you can drink nog fountain to Elmdale!

And just what is this exciting new venture?

And keep an eye on the place while you are gone.

And let me show it to you.

And like, I totally get it, there's a new girl in town,

And like...

And listen,

And me, but in this case, you.

And more suited to a ponytailed lothario,

And most days I can barely get you to come back after lunch.

And most importantly,

And most of them are filled with paperwork I have to go through,

And must start all over again,

And my cousin, who is a single man over 40.

And my dazzling eyes, and they said,

And my parents say hi, by the way.

And need a lift.

And never once looked at the paperwork, so.

And not all of us can flirt our way

And not following too closely in her footsteps.

And not out in public, among the throngs of fans.

And now I making uh, Danish, éclair,

And now I realize that might not have been

And now I'm even more stressed out

And on opening night!

And one of them actually robbed the café!

And one who wanders the street,

And only left the icing?

And practically dripping with ennui!

And professional. What?

And second of all, Ted is not my ex boyfriend,

And second, we're gonna need a minute.

And second, who's to say we're not getting his sloppy thirds?!

And secured it with...

And see how things are going then?

And see if you got anything that Johnny can fit into.

And she also asked if you would wash her cat,

And she mentioned that you have yet to RSVP?

And she'll probably bring whoever she's dating.

And she's not crazy.

And since you two are sharing an office,

And single men over 40,

And so that's why we would like to extend

And sold out all your shows?

And some chicken.

And some golden potatoes!

And some people did say that if another thing

And sometimes it's the second or third idea

And sometimes lunch will turn into dinner,

And sometimes, they're not labeled.

And stabbed Armand with her sharpened crutch.

And Stevie's not selling.

And stop worrying about everything,

And take care of the place.

And that can be super intimidating,

And that doesn't make me feel good.

And that is why I missed my final semester.

And that person is hurt,

And that was mainly because I was casually

And that way we might be able to...

And that's the most important job of all.

And that's why you fail all the time.

And the big group at twelve,

And the Bratva work very quickly.

And then everything just canceled out.

And then I'll be back for that sandwich,

And then ran in the opposite direction.

And then the courses that weren't full

And then the other one kind of just like hops...

And then the year before there were three murderers,

And then there are the kids...

And then there's the banter about the food,

And then took the driving test, and passed!

And then you get out.

And then your learner's permit expired,

And there is nothing to taste!

And there were lots of questions,

And they are going to be different.

And they are going to be great.

And they harvest the seeds.

And they wanted us to test drive the course,

And they've got coin laundry, and a Jacuzzi.

And this could be uh... very helpful.

And this is a pressing issue for you?

And truth be told,

And Twyla just wandered around kind of winking at everybody,

And uh, eggs,

And uh, the line's getting really long!

And um, and meet you back here, then.

And um, I wanted to see if I needed to cancel

And um, Kirsten also told me at the premiere

And um... screaming?

And uncomfortable for everyone.

And unfortunately, what we're discovering

And upgraded beds,

And we all know how I feel about scooters,

And we said, the people of this town,

And we would've fought anyone

And wear your best hair perfume.

And what about your license?

And what business is this?

And what I'm saying is that things haven't

And what kind of proposal is this, Mr. Rose?

And what on earth is a Christmas World?

And what's that, your friends at Christmas World

And when that idea comes,

And while I can't pretend to fully understand them,

And while I not so secretly love Avril,

And while we're at it,

And who do you think bought all that art,

And who do you think bought all your patrons?

And whose fault is that?!

And why am I not surprised to see you in here?

And with you attached,

And yes, I did not finish high school.

And you can't drive it unless you have your license on you,

And you chose to eat lunch alone.

And you failed the practical two more times.

And you had a...

And you had to do the written test again,

And you mustn't let anyone push you around,

And you wanna be the first one to do it,

And you were gluing shiny jewels...

And you work your way down from there.

And you. Oh! I get one.

And you'd had that unfortunate run in

And you'll know the software is working

And you're better off for it, David.

And you're brimming with it, darling.

And you're going to make yours,

And you're not just driving us home illegally.

And you've both been with me.

And your plan is to raise it from the ashes?

And...

And... frankly,

Antivirus. The guy's amazing.

Any chance of a bailout?

Any help you need, accounting, sales, marketing...

Anything else?

Anyway, I think it would be so great

Anyway, it's not a big deal.

Anyway, just don't trust anyone

Anyway, you pick the pinecones,

Anyway, you take care.

Anyways, it turns out I'm one of the few who did,

Approach that...

Are less suited to a family's needs,

Are looking for a deeply embittered,

Are the police auctioning off crime scene vehicles?

Are we sure this is the right place?

Are you guys done with the car?

Are you looking at courses now?

Are you watching this, Stevie?

Arrange viewings,

As a mother who once invested a great deal

As a tennis pro,

As it is an opportunity.

As long as you don't over think it.

As you can see, we can't even afford

As your thing,

Aside from the fact that I caught wind

At a rural sandwich counter.

At first.

At least once a week.

At the Castros'.

At the Hotel de Ville, in Crissier,

At the same time,

Avec sauce.

Avoid befalling a similar fate?

Awards.

Bagels, I know.

Basically my worst nightmare.

Basically so clients can schedule

Be the snowball!

Be the snowball.

Beautiful, see that?

Because all of the arrangements have fallen to me!

Because Christmas World pulled out.

Because he wasn't actually there for me,

Because I didn't finish high school.

Because I don't really think you know

Because I forgot to have breakfast,

Because I look like I don't have any money!

Because I was the one at the consulate

Because I'm overdressed, I need to look like

Because I'm thinking of

Because the lease is yours, David,

Because the stupid people at the college

Because things have gotten complicated!

Because we get carried away chatting, and...

Because we trusted you!

Because what if things get complicated?

Because you are the owner now.

Because you know Twyla.

Because your parents threw money at you?

Been as easy for me as they've been for you!

Before he had any more "olives."

Before I fail this test.

Before the passion dies again!

Before you tackle the cones.

Between 5:30 and 6 P.M.

Between a child who gets picked up safely,

Blueberry butter tart with chips of chocolate...

Blueberry butter tart with raisin,

Bob, I've got a meeting with a client in an hour,

Bob, okay, there's a way to do these things,

Bob, this sounds like a scam.

Bob, who's sitting at my desk?

Bob! You're making a note!

Bone appetit, I think it's a dog bone joke.

Bordeaux?! The trip I planned for the two of us?

Breaths!

Breaths!

Bumper sticker.

Bun appetite.

Bun appetite.

Bun appetite.

Bun...

Business person were to step in?

But apparently none of the venues around here

But each of us is going to drive this,

But full of promise, I'm sure.

But have the two of you thought about the planning

But here's the thing,

But I almost think I should finish high school.

But I am anxious to know...

But I believe I'm lunching with Alexis.

But I couldn't help overhear your story.

But I did meet Beyonce in Mykonos,

But I didn't know she outright owned it.

But I find that when I get tired,

But I guess she is like 50, so that makes sense.

But I I can certainly uh...

But I just wanted to let you know that I'm actually

But I need to look like I don't have money.

But I opened those galleries myself.

But I said that you were too busy.

But I think I can maybe broaden my horizons a bit.

But I think I can we can find

But I was just protecting you.

But I was thinking...

But I'm glad we were able to deal with this

But I'm just having trouble... seeing the menu.

But if it makes you feel any better,

But is this really the kind of business

But it seems like their intentions were good.

But it's also not a good thing.

But it's always the exact same set,

But it's been so great seeing you, Mr. Rose.

But it's not.

But John will be there,

But just because no one is currently seeing

But maybe if you could just relax for a second,

But maybe this is uh...

But now you're making it sound like some...

But sometimes your choices...

But surely the old pulp mill had its charm,

But thanks.

But the last thing we want is a situation

But the upshot is this,

But then I remembered...

But there's uh...

But this cause affects everyone.

But today it's more like a really intense throbbing.

But uh, I don't wanna be taken advantage of

But uh...

But um, there's a leaky faucet

But we don't have a television, so.

But we have plans this Saturday night.

But we know they're here somewhere.

But we should talk about urns for your aunt.

But when I looked into it, all the courses were full.

But when one considers the alternatives...

But why do you need it, though?

But you can't share a piece of cake?

But you don't enjoy children,

But you don't you don't care about this, do you?

But you know what?

But you tell that to the mother

But you told me I should use the bathroom during the break,

But you weren't interested.

But you've just been kind of hanging around a lot lately,

But... don't you just know Twyla would be thrilled

But... still.

But... still.

But... thank you.

Butter tart,

By giving us a better price.

By Russian mobsters.

Bye.

Bye.

Came the idea to start my own business.

Can I just... for a sec?

Can put you through!

Can you get us some whitener for the coffees?

Can you hold the wheel for a second,

Can you imagine?

Cathartic journey for you guys.

Charge you for two uh, half combos.

Charging for late check outs?

Charging full price to the long term guests here.

Check it out.

Children, have some respect for your father's condition.

Christmas World! Moving into town!

Cinnamon buns for you.

Cinnamon buns.

College, so crazy.

Come back after lunch.

Come on in!

Comes out of the cold water tap?

Coming up.

Conflicted with each other,

Constantly worried which East Asian palace

Continental breakfast?

Continental travelling.

Cool.

Could be very lucrative.

Could handle his sound...

Could we remember please that these are real people,

Could've timed that one better.

Country cousin.

Courage!

Crucial that we...

Cruising the Monte Carlo coast.

Dare I say,

David should be in very good hands.

David,

David, Alexis.

David, is he here to s...

David, sit, please.

David, stop acting like a disgruntled pelican!

David, there you are.

David, this isn't funny!

David, we just insured the car,

David, would you drive your mummy to Town Hall, please?

David, you were dressed like a harlequin,

David: Uh, who picked through my cake,

David!

David?

David's puttin' money in the coffers,

Decided to display the fungal cream beside the cereal boxes.

Decompressing.

Did everyone show up?

Did I mention it was a potluck?

Did it ever come together?

Did somebody book a room?

Did someone die,

Did you get in a bar fight?

Did you know that according to IMDB,

Did you know you can still get mail?

Didn't wanna spend any time with you.

Didn't you say on your résumé

Do I sell the motel?

Do we really want Big Brother programming every waking minute

Do we scatter it all, or do we...

Do you guys have any other plans this afternoon?

Do you have it?

Do you mind putting these in Mrs. Hertzman's file?

Do you wanna have lunch tomorrow?

Do you want a left turn, or a right turn?

Do you want my honest opinion?

Does not mean that you are not

Does not mean that you...

Does this town not deserve to have a marquee guest

Doesn't mean it falls in everyone else's.

Doing a continental breakfast at the motel,

Don't do that sort of thing doesn't mean it's impossible!

Don't listen and pick a point on the wall if you need to.

Don't quote me on this,

Don't throw any parties.

Don't wanna set a bad example

Don't worry, I'm gonna let you tell him.

Don't you remember?

Doris: Can I help you with those?

Dress each room with complimentary baskets

Dressed in archival designer silk.

Dry toast, and more coffee, please.

Eating breakfast, and...

Either way, in reality,

End of story.

Ensnare this maniac,

Entre vous, s'il vous plait.

Especially since the previous business has gone under.

Even better, someone might book a room.

Even if this deal falls through,

Even though I love to eat cake,

Everyone has a car!

Everything would be easier for you!

Exactly, David.

Except I'm always the girl getting into the truck.

Except there was this one point in high school

Excuse me?

Expect thoughtful party favors,

Fair enough, I would've done the same thing.

Far from it.

Female Customer: I wanted to order the fish.

Female Customer: You know what, I'll just order

Figuratively speaking,

Fill up the sandwich bag?

Fine, I will make a surprise appearance.

First class catering.

Five things about yourself.

For 20 minutes, so that I can do my transcendental meditation

For a decade and a half with random men,

For a more worthy charity.

For an undertaking of this scope!

For conflict. Okay.

For everything I've said since coming in here today.

For hanging out with you, so...

For high school, do you think?

For him and for us.

For like, 15 minutes to an hour,

For quite some time now,

For taking the time to see me today.

For the general store.

For the motel, effective immediately,

For the rest of the motel staff.

For the start up money!

For this yuletide gift?

For your next franchise.

For your sake, Stevie!

Frighteningly high sugar levels.

From Halloween last year.

From the dust before I have to open another one.

From what I've heard, I wouldn't be friends with her,

From yourself.

Front desk.

Fruit, fish, and... sauce.

Funeral Director: Sorry about the mess.

Fungal?

General Store Aired the 21st February 2017

Generally speaking.

Get a few cats,

Girls,

Girls?

Give some real thought to.

Go tell Stevie of your decision.

Go, John!

Good morning, class.

Good morning, Twyla.

Good news,

Good, 'cause even with just a little cash flow,

Good, then my work is done.

Good! Good!

Gotcha.

Great, and the security code on the back?

Great. Muah!

Greens are a little fast, but I like that.

Gwen did tell me if I uh,

Gwen does all her internet stuff there,

Gwen's gonna lose her mind!

Ha ha ha!

Hah! Done!

Hard worker, never hurt no one.

Have you been in there the whole time?!

Have you no empathy?!

He can't drive, his license is expired.

He didn't care.

He didn't even look at my computer!

He dropped me off...

He is my ex fiancé.

He literally came here from my room.

He told me not to, he said it was off.

He was fine.

He was so blissfully unaware.

He what?!

He's like a snowflake. Yeah.

Head butted by her goat.

Heather Warner doesn't actually have a cat.

Hello, Mr. Rose.

Hello, uh, Johnny Rose. You are?

Hello! Moira!

Hello? Sorry.

Hello.

Help out here. Oh!

Her meds right now.

Here is Jocelyn's visor,

Here we go, dear, here's the chair.

Here, why don't you have this,

Here's the issue, Mr. Rose,

Here's the muffins.

Here's what I'm hearing you say,

Hey babe, I'm just getting caught up here.

Hey, hey, David, isn't that your friend?

Hey, I think that we started out on the wrong foot.

Hey, it's you.

Hey, Stevie.

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey! Um, about what?

Hey.

Hey.

Hey.

Hi honey, are you sitting down?

Hi, I'm looking for Stevie Budd.

Hi, uh, I'm I'm Jake.

Hi.

Hip we can do!

Hipper than these suits. Hip!

Hmm, and here I am trying very hard to repeat

Hmm, that sounds like it is gonna be...

Hmm, that's really perceptive.

Hmm, we should probably get going.

Hmm, well, I asked Kirsten Dunst,

Hmm.

Homeless toddlers?!

Honey, why don't you check your closet,

How about a signature cocktail?

How are we feeling right now?

How can we assure our constituents

How did you make that happen?

How far ahead should we be walking?

How far into the 15 minutes do you think we are?

How is that better?

How long have you been carrying that around in your wallet?!

How long have you been here for?

How many did we have before?

How much money do you think we can get from council?

How was your tester guy, was he a monster?

However, if any of this falls through for any reason,

Huh! So uh...

Huh?

I always watch romantic movies.

I am blinded by the disenfranchisement.

I am doing this all on my own.

I am looking for a very lucky person

I apprenticed costume design under Stan LaCoulier.

I asked.

I assumed you guys were cool with it.

I assure you, council will examine this issue

I bake for Twyla.

I believe this town could be the perfect spot

I blame myself.

I blow it.

I came home from lunch because I realized

I can at least attempt to care!

I can do it right here on Johnny.

I can do that.

I can help with that, Twyla.

I can tell you that when you buy a golf package,

I can understand why you'd say that,

I can't go to college,

I can't tell what's more tragic,

I care, the driving examiner person cares.

I come bearing good news.

I could build an appropriate look...

I did, he invited me here for dinner.

I didn't know... No! No, no.

I didn't order this, I ordered the fish.

I didn't see you.

I didn't think anybody would be home.

I do have a bad back,

I do have a very good idea.

I do see your hand up Alexis,

I don't get Christmas World passed,

I don't have any investors.

I don't have money.

I don't know about arrangement,

I don't know how many times I have to thank you

I don't know whether I want your sloppy seconds!

I don't know why you didn't ask me first, David.

I don't know,

I don't know, is there something wrong with that?

I don't know!

I don't know.

I don't mean to pressure you,

I don't need coffee with breakfast, so.

I don't skate through Life, David,

I don't think anybody's not cool here.

I don't think I should be here for this.

I don't think I was asking.

I don't think that was ever the thing, so...

I don't think that's gonna work.

I don't think that's... that's not what this is,

I don't think this is a good time to ask.

I don't think you could handle it.

I don't wanna hear you say fungal again.

I don't wanna pressure anyone,

I don't want to hear the I don't want...

I failed the written test twice,

I feel like I'm seeing your rough and rugged

I feel like there's a request coming on.

I fixed the drip in David and Alexis' bathroom,

I found Johnny at the Cafe, he'd had a lot of olives,

I got from the Blouse Barn.

I got this old compass at a flea market;

I got this. I'm happy to do it.

I guess that's all, that's it now, thanks.