Slacker (1991) Soundboard Edit

A friend of mine has this real weird theory about Smurfs.

A lot of truth in the Late, Late Show

A video image is much more powerful and useful...

Actually, I kind of agree with it.

All it does is fill the bellies of the pigs who exploit us.

All it does is remind him of his limitations and frustrate him.

All right? We're being taxed out of our asses...

All right. But I don't know. Sounds like you're plugging for Scooby Snacks to me.

All right. Couldn't get in. Universal sadness all around us.

And as long as I'm in a relationship, I swear I cannot be objective

And doesn't do much of anything, yeah

And fuckin' explodin' and see the people explodin'.

And have their "breakfast of infamy."

And he's actually suffering from oxygen deprivation. He's brain dead.

And I didn't even see the knife impact on the body. I missed that part.

And it brought the scent of spices out to us three miles out from shore

And it just ricocheted around inside with him for a while.

And it's great. It's just got this like second by second account...

And it's like they don't want your kids running off, you know.

And make it work for us instead of us working for it

And making them colonize the moon and Mars.

And now that I look back on it, it was really terrible

And she scored this for me from the lab where she works.

And showing them his gun and going like

And somebody like Pinochet who's already out of there back in Chile..

And that if we could tap into that we would just have...

And that's the same thing as Smurfs. They don't want, like, some Smurf..

And the blood, it was all wrong. It didn't look like blood

And the fact of the matter is that the bombs have already fallen

And the people who win these elections are gonna be too ashamed...

And the triangulation of the bullets and stuff.

And then you got the whole other end of the realm where there's like the Smurfs...

And they relate to blue people when Krishna comes about, you know.

And they were interrogating him.

And they're specifically set up by the C.I. A...

And totally unoriginal.

And watch movies.

And we go back to her apartment, I mean, she has this great apartment.

And you don't just go to the lake. You have to prepare for it.

And, like, a boyfriend is the furthest thing from my mind

And, uh, well.

Another example would be like back there at the bus station.

Anti grav drive. Anti gravity technology.

Anything you want, chains, knives, straight razors...

Anyway, there's this sci fi movie called Alternative Three.

As I got off the bus, the thought crossed my mind..

Best Evidence. That's the one with all the head snap stuff in it.

But he said he didn't think it was too good an idea, you know.

But I've been thinking about it, and I think it's kind of cool.

But movies are photography, 24 times a second.

But now, Charles Whitman...

But then, of course, then there's my real favorite one right here..

But you tell them to do something, and they do it.

But, uh, his room is, like, totally empty.

By the concepts these people lay before us.

By the profits from the MedellÌn drug cartel.

By the time I got there, everything was blocked off.

Catapults throwin' rocks and shit and blowin' up.

Check that bag for some I.D. You better call the family.

Colt.45s, shotguns.

Come on, get out. Hit the road. Strike the pavement. Get out of here.

Communists killed it long before Franco got there.

Could I have another one? Is that allowed?

Dairy Queens? What the hell you wanna do that for?

Did I invite you over here to talk to me?

Did you vote in the most recent election?

During the revolution.

Every single commodity you produce is a piece of your own death.

Except it's absolutely true, all of it.

Finally his car spun out and slammed into the grassy knoll...

Forgive my Grief. It is great.

Fought with Orwell. Didn't know it then, of course.

Hanging out, resting.

Have a nice day.

He had this one dachshund named Sheba that he just took with him everywhere.

He must've been onto something, man.

He took them hostage. The SWAT team came in and offed him.

He was a serious fuck up.

He was always getting loaded, beating up my mom..

He was fascinated with his dogs.

He's found wandering around, didn't know who he was, where he came from

Hell, no. I got less important things to do.

Hello?

Here, watch. It's easy. Watch.

Hey, listen, I'll tell you what.

Hey, man. What are you doing? You're supposed to be getting this down. It was pretty good there.

Hey, wait up.

Him because it's not really gonna help him.

I always knew all that stuff how he had been a hit man for the mob in Chicago...

I always remember 'em really good.

I can't press rewind. I can't put it on pause

I can't put it on slo mo and see all the little details.

I do realize that. There are better ways to help

I don't know.

I don't think anyone who's ever done anything..

I feel like hanging out outside

I guess that means all of us.

I had lunch right out front there every day that summer

I have one about every two years or something.

I haven't seen you around in a long time.

I just read and work here and sleep and eat...

I mean, all those other directions, just because they thought about it...

I mean, at this very second, I'm in that

I mean, entirely different movies, but we'll never see it...

I mean, it's like across that gray quantum divide is this new consciousness.

I mean, it's like I've been banging my head against this 19th Century type, uh

I mean, it's new physics. You can't look at something without changing it.

I mean, look at this man across the street in a tie.

I mean, our thought processes have been totally subverted...

I mean, there was nothing going on at all.

I mean, we're walking around here right now, and it's really time for us to take action

I move in with her, you know.

I own a mansion and a yacht

I really don't know too much about this. I was kind of just flipping through.

I should know. I'm a medical doctor

I should know. I'm a medical doctor.

I should know. I'm a medical doctor.

I wanna see a goddamn big motherfuckin'...

I was just talking with my publisher at this small press

I was seeing it for real, but it just wasn't right.

I would have been there too

I'd like to hear from you. I mean it.

I'm back at the bus station just hangin' out, you know...

I'm glad the son of a bitch is dead.

I'm really not sure. Something about a bronze age coming in the '90s or something.

I'm supposed to be at a movie, so I gotta get a move on.

I'm wondering, worrying all the time.

I've conquered the fear of rejection.

I've just expanded and expanded upon it, you know. And I went on

If some other people might be interested.

It had two pubic hairs in it, and I showed it to this asshole...

It seems like after we've decided that we need one another to be happy..

It seems like rejection looms, ever present.

It seems then this ebb and flow thing sets in.

It was just way too radical, and way beyond anything they were doing.

It's a covert operation between the United States government and the Soviet Union

It's a Madonna pap smear.

It's all a whole bunch of values and junk they're throwing at you.

It's an escape from working on yourself, from perfecting yourself

It's been on four years, two months.

It's got your P.M.S. section over here.

It's just a concoction of lies...

It's like premeditated fun

It's like there's always something bizarre going on in those.

It's like, like the Smurfs are like Mom and Dad

It's not. See, when you pity someone...

It's past 2:00. Everybody out.

It's the best thing for you to do right now to take care of this problem

It's, you know, one of a kind. It's like chance of a lifetime.

Just a little security check. There've been some people missing.

Just a sec.

Just come and fuckin' get anything you want.

Just look at that shit.

Kids see blue people, they, like, relate to Smurfs.

Landed right on the ground

Let's go for a walk

Like back when I used to go out, when I was last out...

Like take Scooby Doo, you know.

Like there's Shaggy and there's Scooby Doo, and they say...

Look at me. I'm making it.

Look, this one here. It's my pride.

Lourdes will be here end of next week.

Ma'am, excuse me.

Man, shit. I should've stayed at the bus station.

Man, this old man driving to town from San Antonio...

Nah, I'm kidding. Actually, I'm on my way to New York.

Nah...

No, I feel like being an anti artist means that...

No, man. I don't want him licking my arm.

No. I don't know if I buy that.

Noncitizens, the underage, the overage, people too old to get to the polls.

Not so, my friend. Not so.

Now the typewriter.

Of course, if you like that, you should really read Six Seconds in Dallas...

Oh, drag. Anybody get a licence plate number or anything?

Oh, hey. Ow, man

Oh, I see you're reading Rush toJudgment

Oh, I'll be long dead, gone and out of here."

Oh, it's beautiful.

Oh, no. No, thanks.

Oh, well, I did find out some really startling information aboutJack Ruby.

Oh, well, it's really good. If you like that...

Oh, well. I looked and stuff.

Oh, yeah. And she swears that she saw this, uh, Dallas patrol car...

People are running around here dwelling in the 11 th hour concept...

Prisoners. We got more people incarcerated in this country...

Rock 'n' roll

Said that 350,000 children are just missing.

Say I have a dream some night...

Scooby Doo, he, like, looks at you. It's like

See, that's just a momentary glimpse into this other reality..

She had some stupid appointment that day.

She travels a lot.

She's not here right now. I mean, I don't think she's up yet

Show's over. Let's go.

So 18% is nothing.

So Bush got 54% of 35%

So during this town's finest hour, where was I?

So how could you let it bother you?

So how long have you lived here?

So I wanna see people putting secret things in fuckin' cars..

So this is a dub of my copy. You think you'd want a tape of this?

So why don't you let me put that up for you?

So, man, have you seen Elvis lately?

So, what else has been going on?

Some chick who had a bullet lodged in her ponytail..

Still have my C.N.T. card. I'll show it to you later.

Sure.

Tell you what. Take my card. Give me a call

Terrorism's the surgical strike capability of the oppressed

Than any other country in Western history.

Thanks. About time.

That I at least wanna possess them, because I have work for them right now.

That I'm with some strange woman I've never met..

That was all created back there at the bus station.

That, like, this is my dream from that reality.

That's catchy. Yeah, I like that.

That's nothing. That's nothing. That's not a mandate

That's right. Oh, it all begins to leak out then...

The government's sitting on the fact that it's 10 20 years maximum.

The name's Steve. S T E V E.

The next person who passes us...

The thing you choose not to do...

Then I start getting insecure.

There's a hole in the fence

There's this new section about how J.F.K. and Jackie were speed freaks.

They got this drug down in Guatemala in the rain forest.

They say that 50.3%, in the media...

They're all there.

They're sent here to make men just writhe in pain.

This is the 20th anniversary of the moon walk, you know.

This secret group, you know, the group that's in charge of the government

This stupid idea that 95% of the brain is unused..

This whole neighborhood and you couldn't get a fuckin' TV?

Those days in Barcelona. My God

Tight.

To all you workers out there.

To hell with the kind of work you have to do to earn a living

Twenty three years this summer.

Uh huh.

Uh, nothing.

Uh, Pop Tart? There's red ones. Blue ones over there.

Uh, yes, it is

Was the only anarchist in the bunch.

Way the hell out on South Congress

We can go check it out. We could always go to a movie later.

We could maybe have a beer or

We couldn't beat the greenhouse effect anyway

We go through a good phase, then we regress, you know.

We gotta put the bread and everything in the fridge.

We're gonna give away all the fuckin' automatic weapons.

We're gonna go up to the Space. There's a performance.

We're The Ultimate Losers now.

Well, he had to borrow my guitar tonight, so..

Well, the wall doesn't exist. It's not there, you know.

Well, there is no tunnel. There is no structure

Well, we all know the psychic powers of the televised image..

Well, you know, these all look really good..

What did you do with the bookmark?

When Dorothy meets the Scarecrow and they do that little dance at that crossroads...

When he throws the typewriter in, read the passage that's marked in the book.

When I hear the true call.

When I was at home, I was, like, flipping through the TV stations endlessly, reading.

Why do you think the C.I.A

With sexual intercourse

With, like a squirt gun or what.

Working the streets basically. Going to New York just to work the streets..

Yeah, he was up there on the overpass over Dealey Plaza..

Yeah, I got the pop up pistons.

Yeah, I loaned them to somebody else though.

Yeah, it was nice meeting you guys.

Yeah, yeah

Yeah. It's gonna be good though

You can ask yourself what they've been doing sitting on their ass for 49 years, huh?

You can buffer your last thought or think about something new.

You can't be here. And I wanna go home. Let's go.

You can't see any true potential.

You know about the suppressed transmission, of course?

You know, I'll drive

You know, the median.

You know, the true call. I know when I hear it.

You know, they do a little psycho surgery on us, a little liquid lobotomy here.

You might wanna watch Blow Up tonight at 4:00.

You should never name things in order

You should never traumatize.

You should quit. You should quit.

You should quit. You should quit. You should

You should really read one of the other books around here. It might be here.

[Man #3] Let's get the fuck out ofhere. They never had a chance.

All right. The last one's theJackie Kennedy issue...

All right. I might see you inside. Have fun inside.

and give this little "Tit Tit

Another beer, chips. Coffee, beer

Answering to Papa Smurf. Yeah, it's safety in numbers

Are you coming? Nah, think I'm gonna catch that show.

Are you glad to be back? Yeah, it was incredible

Are you going in? Yeah.

Can I have his room? Sure, why not?

Didn't get along? Hell, no.

Hey, what's going on? Uh, nothing

Hint, hint, you know? Do y'all wanna go?

I love it here except for the fuckin' ants. Ants?

Is that true? Really, really. Yeah.

Let's go. Let's go.

No, I don't think so. Okay

No, tell me all about it. Okay. Well, I mean...

No. And it's just no one's heard about it.

No. I don't Well.

Not at all. Wanna make somebody's life hell?

Oh, really? I didn't realize that. Oh, yes

Oh, yeah? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

Oh, yeah? They're back.

Okay. Just go through there.

Paper? No, thank you.

Really? Yeah, check it out. Pretty hip, huh?

saying that Oswald didn't like his eggs and used bad language. You're kidding.

So we gotta like totally roll

Sorry. Fuck it. Should've let him rot

Telephone. It's Lourdes. Oh, great.

That same one? Really, that same one

That's fascinating. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

These are friends of yours then? Friends? Friends is not the word.

Too bad. Yeah

We can get in free. Thanks.

We've already missed it. Oh, no. Come on. Come on

What do you need? Can I have a cup of coffee?

What was his thesis on? You know, I don't know.

What was your name? Rachael.

What's up, dude? I'm on the guest list. Three dollars

when he went to silence Oswald. Uh huh.

Yeah, I could get some stuff. All right.

Yeah, so what do you guys need? More coffee, please

Yeah, that's my birthday. Right. So, see...

You should come check it out. I'm not sure what we're doing, but

You've written one of these books? Well, I've been working on mine.

Yourself? Oh, yeah, you know me.

"I have no pity for them...

"It's someone who looks like me."

"No, it wasn't me."

"Number four: renunciation of all human endeavor.

"One is called Frank something, and he thinks there are some more..

"the torture of self mistrust, and the misery of the vanquished

"They found your fingerprints

"Whereas he is always the last term of a preceding series

"Withdrawing in disgust is not the same thing as apathy

[Cheers]

[Chuckles] Gotcha.

[Delia] Hey, you forgot something

[Engine Starts]

[lmitates Gunshot]

[Reading In French]

[Scoffs] Yeah, right.

[Sirens Approaching]

[Woman] I heard you had a really great time in Europe.

∂ Every time I move it seems I barely miss that damn boat ∂∂

∂ Past the Conoco, the Abel's ∂

∂∂ ['50s Rock]

∂∂ [Continues]

∂ I'm getting tired of this mobile home shoved up my ass ∂

∂ That no one ∂