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Home > Charlie Sheen Sounds
NSFW Audio: Use caution, some sounds may be offensive
A coincidence?
All good all good guys. Quit panicking. Quit panicking. No panic, no judgment.
Amateurs and the Bible grippers....the Bible grippers....
And he has an army of assassins.
And I will. I will destroy you in the air, and I will. I will. I will deploy my ordnance to the ground.
And it's inhabited, its shoulders inhabited by the ghost of Betty and now it will murder people. It will eat trolls with this razor fangs, then drop their slings off their children, tiny houses.
And keep in mind like anytime I roll something out, my plan is the best one in the Roman people are starting to wake up and realize that their plan is shit. My plan is gold walk into my plan and we...
And the gratitude I get this get this is this charlatan chose not to do his job, which is to write.
And the reason you must hate violently is because - And you have to hate everybody that's not in your family, because they're there to destroy your family.
And then I just gotta add this. There was a whole firestorm yesterday about Brooke being part of our part of our crew and this let me just say this. This is all I'm going to say about it was is tha...
And then they will get out there and they will sell me. And then they will lose.
And they will lose the rest of their lives as they think about me.
Are you in Italy Ville still?
As a fellow warrior.
As I said, the first ones free the next one goes in your mouth.
As I was saying, because people are calling; I need to change my number to get rid of these freaking interruptive trolls....
Badly
Battle cry my deadly and dangerous secret in silence soldiers.
Be afraid.
Be one of us.
Because I have real fame. They have nothing. They have zero.
Because they wanted to.
Because they're there to destroy your family.
Bible grippers
Black Bart.
Boom!
Bring it.
Bring me a challenge somebody.
Bring me a challenge, somebody. Bring me a freaking challenge, because....you know?
Broken down plagiarist.
Buh-bye
Bull S-H-I-T
Bull S-H-I-T
But I dare anyone to delete me on things.
But I'm excited to get back to work.
But I'm excited to get back to work.
But you're just messing with one dude.
Bye bye.
Can you hear me babalu, Babalu? Can you hear me?
Can you hear me?
Can't use the word 'sober', 'cause that's a term from "those people".
Catch my drift?
Charlie Sheen.
Come on, it was brilliant. You loved it. Let's just do a follow up.
Cured it with my brain.
Damn.
Damn.
Deal with it.
Delivering the goods at every fucking turn.
Didn't make the rules. Oops!
Do the math.
Don't call me right now - anybody! We're in the middle of genius!
DUH
Effortlessly and magically converting your your tin cans into pure gold.
Exactly.
F18 to Top Gun radical fire. Napalm dropping pilot.
Facial or buttle?
Fly privately around the world.
Fuck.
Genuine. It's crystalline. It's pure.
Gnarly Gnarlington
Go ahead, you speak, I'll listen.
Go ahead; You speak, I'll listen. Jesus crap.
Good luck with that.
Goodbye.
Has an army of assassins.
He was a Pussy.
Hell yeah.
Hello.
Here's your first pee test. Next one goes in your mouth. No you won't get high.
Here's your first pee test. Next one goes in your mouth. No, you won't get high.
Hey, let me let me put you on speaker. I'm gonna record this one also OK?
High on acid until the day he died.
His unevolved mind cannot process
Hold on, hold on. Let me see if this thing even has speaker 'cause this is freaking you know, built by trolls. Keep that in mind. Phones were built by trolls.
How can that be? It like we are in the in the in the middle of a movement here an Odyssey of epic proportions, epic, epic proportions. How can that be? It? That's all you have.
I can't process it.
I didn't get that text yet, you know.
I didn't get that text yet, you know.
I don't give a FUCK.
I don't give a fuck.
I don't know; won the Academy Award at 23.....
I embarrassed him in front of his children and the world, by healing at a pace that his unevolved mind cannot process.
I embarrassed him in front of his children and the world....
I had more than fun. I had me with it.
I had no idea that the 4th dimensional aspect aspect of it would occur.
I have a disease? Bullshit! I cured it with my brain, with my mind.
I have battle-tested bayonets, bro.
I have cleansed myself.
I have real fame. They have they have nothing. They have 0.
I know, but I did say early on that that you know that this is being recorded because people need to hear my gold as it rolls out, not as it's like disappearing, disappearing like like so many frea...
I spent, I think, close to the last decade. I don't know effortlessly and magically converting your your tin cans into pure gold.
I was getting a tattoo during the death from above and it was a. It's the banner from the Death card that kilgoris throwing on his victims, but there's also falling from it is the is the Apple from...
I will destroy you in the air and I will. I will. I will deploy my ordnance to the ground.
I will love you violently.
I will murder you violently.
I will not. I will not waste my precious time on such ridiculous nonsense.
I work for the Pope; we murder people.
I'll be over here, just I don't know waiting.
I'm an F-18, bro.
I'm cured, I'm done.
I'm dealing with fools and trolls.
I'm going to tell your wife I'm going to tell your wife.
I'm gonna hang out with these two smokin' hotties.
I'm just I I forwarded you exactly how she spelled it. If she doesn't know how to spell her own name, then she loses ups.
I'm sorry man. I got I got I got magic and I got poetry at my fingertips.
I'm sorry man. I got I got I got magic and I got poetry in my fingertips and I'm you know at.
I'm sorry.
I'm tired, I'm so tired of pretending like my life isn't perfect and bitching and just winning.
If they want me in it, it's a smash. If they don't, it's a turd that opens on a tugboat.
If you own the home in which you own the trash can, you should never have to empty it, ever, ever, ever again.
In front of the prom queen.
In my movie theater.
It is his job to go out there and embarrass people.
It might be lonely up here, but I sure like the view.
It was incredible. If you haven't done this, I urge you to make plans and do this tonight.
It's all good guys, quit panicking.
It's just not an option.
It's just strafing runs in my underwear before my first Cup of coffee because I don't have time for these clowns.
It's just the work of sissies.
It's just you know what's going on and people are, so you know mystified by this this, this, this, this, Odyssey, that that refuses to stop calling itself Charlie Sheen.
It's over.
It's over.
Just sit back and enjoy the show.
Kill me, but you do not have the right to judge me, boom.
Lemme just tell you this, Bob. Lemme tell you this, ok?
Let me just say this about the Goddess is I don't believe the term is is good enough is good enough.
Like in baseball, the scoreboard doesn't lie, never has.
Like trolls under some abandoned bridge.
Living like trolls.
Look what I'm dealing with, man! I'm dealing with fools and trolls.
Looking fear right down the barrel.
Most of the time and this is, you know, this includes naps.
My motto now is you either love or you hate and you must do so violently.
My success rate is 100%
My success rate is 100%. Do the math.
Nananana nanosecond I cured myself.
News flash I am special and I will never be one of you.
No way those guys.
No way.
No; I'm gonna hang on to them, and they're gonna fuel my attack.
Now I'm smoking a cigarette and drinking something I won't reveal.
Oh wait, can't process it losers.
Ok, go! What is it??
Ok, great great great! Well, as it should be. DUH. We're still getting g-gypped!
OK, I can hear you too what's going on, man.
Ok, we'll start in the facial area
OK.
Oops!
Pay me.
People are so, you know, mystified by this, this this, this, this, Odyssey that refuses to stop calling itself Charlie Sheen.
Post to Gucci.
Pure and complete gnarly-isms.
Quit panicking, no panic, no judgment.
Rhymes with winning anyone? Yeah, that would be awesome.
Right down the barrel
Roma to must be ganja.
Save for that little weirdo with his gut strapped in, begging for water. That's not me.
Scoreboard doesn't lie, never has.
So tired of pretending like my life isn't perfect and bitching and just winning.
So we must speak of the Vatican assassins, yes?
So, what we all have, is a marriage of the heart.
That's where you get slaughtered.
The Bible grippers.
The goddess is.
The next one goes in your mouth.
The only thing I'm addicted to right now is winning, you know?
The only thing I'm addicted to right now is winning.
There's a new sheriff in town.
There's a new. There's a new Sheriff in town.
These turds, these little harmonica, least losers.
They're all around you.
This bootleg cult
This guy's got more notches in his belt than I don't know who.
This is me NOT on drugs, bro.
This this this bootleg cult, arrogantly referred to as Alcoholics Anonymous, supports a 5% success rate.
Vatican assassin warlocks.
Vatican assassin warlocks.
Wait, can't process it. Losers winning bye bye.
Waiting for everyone to catch up.
We are high priest.
We're basically in the orca.
We're not live, are we?
Well, hello.
Well, I think it was nailed. It said I was really, really flattered 'cause he got it right then. I'm not, you know he might be nails, but I'm freaking bayonets.
Well, I'm not Thomas Jefferson.
Well, we all have to sit in here and in touch ourselves and frown.
Well, yeah, but there's only one time in the gym. If you catch my drift.
Well, you know you don't look like you're having a lot of fun.
What I wanted to do is I want to watch Jaws on the ocean in the dark and be afraid.
What kind of dog is that?
What?
What's going on, man?
When you're bound by these these these terrestrial descriptions, you must choose the best choice available, right?
When you're bound by these these these terrestrial descriptions, you must use the best choice available, right?
Which nobody again I'm to understand anymore.
Why give an interview when you can leave a warning?
Why not?
Will come at you in all forms and shapes.
Winner winner Chicken dinner. I don't think so. Winner Winner Sheen dinner.
Winner Winner Sheen dinner.
Winning anyone.
Winning.
Winning.
Winning.
Winning.
Winning.
With my mind.
Yeah, no, it's radical. It's radical and the people are doing exactly what they should be doing, which is watching me and listening to you because we have all the answers. We have all the goal we h...
Yeah, no: I'm gonna hang onto them, and they're gonna fuel my attack.
Yeah, you know, it's about time.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You can get home and like, you know, give me a big hug and avoid some eye contact.
You do not have the right to judge me, boom.
You either love or you hate, and you must do so violently.
You know I'm a I'm a. I'm an F18 bro.
You know it's it's just strafing runs in my underwear before my first Cup of coffee because I don't have time for these clowns.
You know; They lay down with their ugly wives in front of their ugly children, and just look at their loser lives, and they look at me and say, "I can't process it!"