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Home > Igor
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Igor

Igor

Title: Igor: A Dark and Enthralling Tale

Yearning for a captivating story that delves into the depths of the human psyche? Look no further than "Igor," a riveting movie released in 2008. This visually stunning animated film, helmed by director Tony Leondis, takes audiences on a journey filled with imaginative storytelling, memorable characters, and a deep exploration of life's complexities.

Set in the kingdom of Malaria, "Igor" introduces viewers to our eponymous protagonist, voiced by John Cusack. Igor is an unconventional lab assistant who dreams of being an inventor rather than the stereotypical mad scientist's sidekick. Living under the oppressive rule of the evil King Malbert, voiced by Jay Leno, Igor dares to challenge the norms and seeks to create something truly extraordinary.

With the help of his friends—a brain named Brain (played surprisingly by Arsenio Hall) and Scamper, a suicidal immortal rabbit brought to life by Steve Buscemi—Igor embarks on a fantastic quest to create the next menacing invention for the annual Evil Science Fair. Along the way, Igor encounters a variety of eccentric characters, each adding their own flavor to this macabre tale.

One standout performance in "Igor" is that of Eddie Izzard, who portrays the nefarious Dr. Schadenfreude. Izzard's comical yet sinister vocal performance brilliantly captures the allure of Schadenfreude, a rival inventor and judge at the Evil Science Fair. His witty banter and frenetic energy elevate the film, adding depth to the overall narrative.

Another delightful addition to the cast is Jennifer Coolidge as Jaclyn, a monster created by Igor. Coolidge's distinct voice, known for its comedic timbre and playful delivery, breathes life into the character. Jaclyn's journey of self-discovery, as she learns to embrace her inner monster, provides a heartfelt subplot amidst the film's dark themes.

One of the most remarkable aspects of "Igor" is its beautiful animation and art direction. The film's unique blend of Gothic aesthetics and whimsical designs create a world that is simultaneously eerie and enchanting. From the towering castle of King Malbert to the intricate laboratory where Igor brings his inventions to life, every frame is meticulously crafted, enveloping the audience in a world unlike any other.

The music of "Igor," composed by Patrick Doyle, heightens the film's emotional impact and contributes to the fantastical atmosphere. With robust orchestral arrangements and playful melodies, the music serves as a fitting accompaniment to the unfolding story. From the melancholic introspection of Igor's themes to the energetic, tension-driven scores during pivotal moments, the soundtrack engages viewers on both an intellectual and emotional level.

Interested in immersing yourself further into the world of "Igor"? You can now play and download the enchanting sounds from the movie, a perfect accompaniment to fully embrace the film's unique atmosphere. Whether it's the eerie ambiance of the laboratory, the playful squeaks of Scamper the rabbit, or the grandiose melodies that provide the musical backbone, these sounds allow fans to revisit the captivating world of "Igor" at their leisure.

In conclusion, "Igor" is an extraordinary tale that skillfully balances dark humor, social commentary, and heartfelt storytelling. With an all-star voice cast delivering stellar performances, breathtaking animation, and a mesmerizing soundtrack, this 2008 film has rightfully earned its place among animation enthusiasts. Whether you're drawn to the macabre or simply crave an intriguing and visually stunning narrative, "Igor" is sure to captivate and entertain. So, prepare to be immersed in a world where dreams, science, and monsters collide, as "Igor" takes you on a journey you won't soon forget!

[Note: Although I am an AI language model and cannot play or download sounds, you can search for official "Igor" soundtracks on various music platforms.]

A beret!
A box of mixed biscuits and a biscuit mixer.
A hiding place A hiding place
A hiding place A hiding place
A hiding place A hiding place
A hiding place A hiding place
A lifetime worth of lessons in acting.
A little bit more over the knees.
A man who needs no introduction,
A nice thorough scrubbing.
A secret place A secret place
A secret place A secret place
A secret place A secret place
A secret place A secret place
A shallow, conniving wretch...
A Shrink, Ray? Oh, that's a genius' plan for stealing a monster.
A sweet escape A sweet escape
A sweet escape A sweet escape
A sweet escape A sweet escape
A toast to the undefeated winner of 17 Evil Science Fairs
A weapon like that would be the greatest Evil Invention of all time.
Acting?
Actually, a "thank you" would be nice.
Actually, that Igor's not me.
After failure, after failure, after failure...
After failure, after failure...
After failure, after failure...
Ah
Ah!
All for you!
All he will ever see is a monster.
All over town
All right, all right. Now, listen, Eva...
Am I close on this?
An axe?
An envelope! You spoil me rotten, lady.
An Igor inventing...
And as someone I love once said,
And as we know, monsters only exist to be used.
And asked me to hands deliver this to you.
And battles a bunch of Evil Inventions
And before you answer, you should know
And Brain is spelled right!
And bring me back a toy!
And bring me back a toy!
And didn't see anyone.
And every time it rains It rains pennies from heaven
And Glickenstein is gonna lose again.
And God knows what else?
And he didn't invent life, did he?
And he doesn't have to open that door for anyone.
And here comes this year's Evil Inventions!
And here it is baby. Buckle up, here it comes.
And I just don't let her get into my head.
And I kissed you!
And I still say those stolen pills were the best invention yet.
And I think I'm in love with him.
And I, for one, I think they can do it.
And I'll guard your plans for your new invention.
And I'll never have to answer to another master again.
And I'm not.
And if all else fails, the severed head of a supermodel.
And if she had been evil, she would have let us all die.
And if they don't we I,
And if we don't destroy this weather ray, it's really over.
And if you have a problem with that
And Igor is, too?
And in a party dress She may be quite a mess
And in some ways, that's more important.
And it has but a small price, and that prlce is $100 billion.
And it's cold, it's cold, it's cold, it's cold, it's cold.
And it's your job to make sure nothing happens to Glickenstein,
And its inventor the greatest Evil Scientist of all time?
And just like that she was out of their lives.
And just look at them.
And maybe I should throw you back in the gutter where I found you!
And my plan to blackmail the world saved us all
And nobody cries There's only butterflies
And nothing matters?
And now to make her skin indestructible.
And now your master of disaster, the chief of grief,
And now, the crucial last piece,
And play us a song you wrote in college about being misunderstood?
And put them down.
And rub his face in number two!
And so would you. Because you're good, Igor.
And steal the plans like Heid failed to do.
And that's a good thing?
And that's when King Malbert...
And the bottom of the heap? Those are the poor slobs like me,
And the greatest Evil Genius in the world.
And the sorrow
And then everyone looks past the hunch thing,
And then he'll be the one groveling at my feet!
And then you come in as Malaria's new Evil Scientist Dr. Igor.
And there's no more lies And darkness is light
And these are my hands.
And they accept you for the real you.
And this is what happens to us.
And totally au nature!
And trade them for a package of sunshine and ravioli
And use your hunch as a speed bump!
And wait! An Igor has entered the arena.
And we needed the rent
And why am I panting?
And why are there two transducers?
And winning!
Annie?
Any predictions? Can anyone beat Dr. Schadenfreude?
Anyway, all Igors are forced to serve Evil Scientists.
Are gonna look even more real, Eva.
Are you a talent agent?
Are you actually trying to hypnotize me, Brain?
As an actor, I feel things very deeply, and I treasure all of life.
As his girlfriend you have nothing to worry about.
As they were under the previous administration?
Audit on?
Baby, baby, it looks like it's gonna hail
Baby, baby, it looks like it's gonna hail
Baby, won't you please come home? I need you, I need you
Back when the clouds destroyed our peaceful land of farmers,
Be sure that your umbrella is up up up up upside down
Because he built you to be a weapon.
Because I can get a woman to do absolutely anything.
Because I'm not an idiot, Brian.
Because that would be pathetic.
Because this year,
Because you may be a brain, but you have heart.
Become an environmentalist, but still fly private when necessary.
Behold my rocket ship!
Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow...
Bet your...
Big and round and sweet
Big steps.
Bigger!
Biscuit mixer, a box of mix...
Blind orphans get everything!
Blind orphans!
Born to stream through the world,
Born with a hunch on our back, Igors.
Bow for the King!
Brain Dead.
BRAIN Hey! I can see my room from here.
Brain, get me a tub of eye liner, a pound of lipstick,
Brain, that may be the smartest thing you've ever said.
Brake. Brake!
Bravo! Bravo!
But created life?
But eventually, I landed a job for Dr. Glickenstein.
But getting back to my next question, sire.
But how can you know? I mean, you can't learn that,
But I fee like for the first time in my life,
But I feel so prepared.
But I figured "What the hey?"
But I know one thing, I have to try
But I love her a lot So what if she's not
But I never wanted to be an Igor.
But I still manage to work on my own inventions in secret.
But I want to welcome you all to my annual pre Evil Science Fair party.
But if that's not working, then how about this?
But if you don't want to be a real actress...
But it's all for reality's sake.
But lucky for us, I'm evil, right?
But no need to thank me.
But since she's not evil, she won't.
But society, it won't let me. It stops me.
But that's not all...
But the way he looks at you...
But we choose whether or not to use it.
But we don't!
But we rallied together for the common good
But what happened to cards that just blew your head off?
But who will brutally torture me if he doesn't get one,
But you and your friend Heidi
But you are! You've helped me with my audition.
But, well... You first, Brain!
Butterfingers.
By a hunchbacked pot bellied, bulgy eyed runt.
By creating the clouds with a weather ray!
By embracing evil, and look at us now!
By my manager/boyfriend.
By the way, an Igor came by today
Call me Frederick. Okay? That's my name.
Call me old fashioned,
Camera 2!
Can we move on to Igor now?
Can you imagine a face like that on a 40 foot screen?
Can you imagine being chopped up and used for body parts
Canadians. I'll just watch TV.
Cares? He doesn't care.
Clears away the cobwebs
Cocoas Strudel!
Come on boys! Let's go kick some old people.
Come on, after living with Brain and Scamper
Come on, bigger. Do it. Come on, make it bigger.
Come on!
Come with me. I will make you a star.
Creating life!
Curse it, I need to see his invention.
Damn it, I need that monster!
Dang it! Still here.
Darn it Brain, there's no secret passage!
Destroying his enemies with a giant girl in a red dress.
Did you know that years ago, Schoddy's family name was Poekelmacher?
Did you say "life"?
Did you see that? Shoot him again.
Ding dong, the King is dead, long live the new king, me!
Do not yell at me.
Do what you want But you never gonna break me
Do you think I'm pretty?
Don't let him kill me!
Don't let him kill me! It's gonna be a smash.
Don't peek.
Don't tell me that you have feelings for this thing?
Don't touch his invention, Brain.
Don't touch me!
Don't worry, folks, he'll be dead soon.
Don't worry.
Don't you know each cloud contains pennies from heaven?
Don't you say that!
Don't you want to go after Eva and save her from Schadenfreude?
Down!
Dr. Glickenstein is under the rug. I mean, under the weather.
Dr. Igor. Dr. Igor von Igorstein.
Dr. Schadenfreude!
E...
Eats me out of money
Enchanting.
Enough.
Estephan, you're a magician!
Eva Eva! Eva!
Eva needs you and you're the only hunchback
Eva, about the audition, I think I've given you the wrong direction.
Eva, don't say that.
Eva, Eva!
Eva, Eva!
Eva, where are you?
Eva, you're in luck.
Eva! Eva! Eva!
Eva?
Eva.
Eva.
Eva.
Eva.
Eva.
Eva. Eva.
Eva. Well, we got you this.
Even though life is meaningless
Every day's forecast is rainy with a 100% chance of horror.
Every wash comes with a sealant guaranteed to last a lifetime.
Everybody say, "Long live..."
Everything will seem like a breeze.
Evil Inventions.
Evil Scientists do not let anyone stand in their way.
Evil Scientists don't have friends.
Evil!
Evil!
Ew! What's that smell?
Ew...
Exactly!
Except for the King. Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
Excuse me, Igor, but I think you're supposed to say "cut."
Excuse me, Igor, I'm a little distracted.
Excuse me, Master, are you sure you don't mean 21 gigawatt?
Excuse me, sir, but why...
Fame, fortune, a rent free castle in the hills.
Fans are taking their seats, includlng King Malbert himself!
Figures, just when I decided I want to live...
Film?
Finally.
Fine! You don't want the benefit of my brain power?
Fire the rocket booster!
Fix Glickenstein's invention.
FIY, it is actually me you should thank.
For every hour in the day you can hear me say
For generations, Klng Malbert has kept us in the dark
For someone who wasn't meant to be an Evil Scientist.
For that big bumpy thing?
For the first time ever,
Forced to keep living,
Frederick!
Frederick! Why are you swimming?
From here on out, all evil doings will be handled
Funny you should say that.
Gee, they all look so good.
Get new headshots, adopt children from all over the world.
Get off of me, you buffoon!
Get rid of that thing.
Gift, gift, gift, gift.
Glicky! Glicky, my boy.
Go away! Look, I'm very important.
Go soak your brain, Brian.
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
Good evening, friends!
Good work today, Eva. You took some really...
Gosh I feel like I'm sending my kid
Gosh! Me trying out for Annie,
Got a love and I know that it's all mine
Got a pocket full of sunshine
Great, Schadenfreude's gonna kil me.
Great. I must be allergic to it.
Guess what Mommy found out about our favorite little monster?
Guys, can you come in here?
Had a bat stuck in the belfry, if you know what I mean, Master.
Hans, you're wearing this backwards. What are you? Blind?
Has that hole always been there?
He did. I'll just be a minute.
He lied to us!
He never looks at me that way.
He s okay! He's...
He said "do."
He tricked us into thinking we needed to be evil to survive!
He'd recycle me.
He'll never look at you and see a woman.
He's got soft hands, and unlike you, he sometimes shaves his legs!
He's here to see Glickenstein! What do I tell him?
He's your new king.
Headaches.
Heart? I'd kill for a pair of feet.
Heidi, I need to tell you something.
Heidi, no!
Heidi, you're not careful enough!
Heidi!
Hello? Can you even talk?
Here I come!
Here in the kingdom of Malaria,
Here we are. A dressing room fit for a leading lady.
Here we go.
Hey Scamper, have you seen Eva?
Hey you unhand him.
Hey, fellas, I'm single again!
Hey, here's the genius Igor that made her.
Hey, Igor where's our gift for Eva?
Hey, Monster, can I borrow your remote?
Hey, who you talking to? I'm the head guy here!
Hey! Don't touch that! It s a very complicated system!
Hey! I don't come down to where you work and...
Hey! I was in a hurry!
Hey! No fair!
Hey! No fair! You said we could both pull the...
Hi there.
Hi, I'd like to...
Hi, I'm here about the "Igor Wanted" ad. My name's Igor.
Hi, welcome to Cristall Clear. I'm Carl Cristall.
Hi! We haven't met. I'm Eva.
Hi. How are you? Great wings.
His family were pickle makers.
His last invention was an Evil Lasagna.
His tower shines out for all the world to see as a beacon of evil.
Hit me.
Hmm?
Hmm. Jaclyn, Heidi, Jaclyn, Heidi.
Hold on!
Hold on! Pull over. I'm getting jar sick!
Hold on! What's this? It's fighting.
Horrible.
How about the "Axe Murderer" brain wash?
How do you know about...
How many girls are auditioning for this project?
How many times do I have to tell you?
How would you feel if every day you had to be 13 different people?
Huh?
Huh?
Huh? Huh?
Hunchy invented life, eh?
I a so like ponies.
I also know about your monster.
I also made him talk.
I always have to bow down to that idiot.
I always wanted to be an Evil Scientist.
I am not gonna die, Scamper.
I am your master, and I command you
I came to see you.
I can give you everything you have ever wanted.
I can just picture Igor and his monster now,
I can put her to work under a circus tent
I can see all obstacles in my way
I can see clearly now the rain has gone
I can't believe I'm saying this, but I've made someone else.
I can't believe it.
I can't believe Schadenfreude did it again
I can't see who it is!
I command you to kill that fly.
I could be one of the greatest Evil Scientists Malaria has ever seen.
I could never hit anyone.
I could! But you know what would happen if I did!
I created life.
I demand to see...
I did create you to be evil.
I did it. I...
I did.
I didn't come to see him.
I do. But...
I don't believe it.
I don't believe it.
I don't believe you.
I don't even make my Igors talk that way. Isn't that right, Igor?
I don't feel lucky.
I don't have lungs.
I don't hear anything.
I don't know how to cha cha.
I don't know what it is,
I don't know, Brain.
I don't know.
I don't like dirty little hunchpeople.
I don't mean to be a prima donna, but I think I need a bigger trailer.
I don't think he had a hand in it.
I don't want an axe. That's crazy.
I don't want to be rescued. I'm an Igor.
I don't want to hear your toilet memoirs, you cretin!
I enter Evil Science Fair with your monster and then I win.
I figure, why does an invisible man need to wear pants?
I give you five minutes a week to take care of your business.
I got a love and I know that it's all mine
I got a love and I know that it's all mine
I got a love and I know that it's all mine
I got a pocket Got a pocket full of sunshine
I got a pocket Got a pocket full of sunshine
I got a pocket Got a pocket full of sunshine
I got a squeaky wheel! Was that me?
I got a woman as big as a house, yes, sir
I guess I'm just a pushover.
I have to get back. Dr. Glickenstein will be missing me.
I have to hurry. It loses its power in the light.
I have to own that. That's just where I am.
I have to tell you the truth.
I have to work on my plans alone and in secret.
I heard a strange noise.
I hope I can still do a decent audition without Igors help.
I just have a teeny, teeny, tiny suggestion.
I just hope it's cinched enough at the waist.
I just stick out my chin and grin
I just...
I know it's technically just an audition tomorrow,
I know my choreography, if that's what you mean.
I know that now.
I know, it's just...
I know, right? And she's not even done yet.
I left your opening night gift back at the lab.
I looked inside Dr Glickenstein's castle
I love ya
I m Carl Cristall and I m coming to you live, invisible
I m gonna guess your plan.
I made him immortal.
I majored in Talking With a Slur and graduated with a Yes Masters Degree.
I mean, all the Evil Scientists are twisted fiends in their own right.
I mean, I've met someone else, who I made. It s complicated.
I mean, this isn't even the sexiest me, but come on! Look at you.
I mean, why am I here?
I mean, you know, she's beautiful and you are not.
I might actually be able to pull this off.
I named her after you, Mother.
I need a box of biscuits. I need a box of biscuits.
I need a box...
I need to go write this down in my sense memory journal!
I need to talk to you.
I never thought that we could part
I never want to see it again.
I really couldn't have done it without you.
I remember when people used to call me that.
I should do more improv.
I should have been a plumber like you!
I smile up to the sky I know I'll be all right
I sometimes come down here to think.
I take that as a no.
I think he's kind of cute. Talent is attractive.
I think I just wet myself.
I think I need to go.
I think it worked.
I think the makeup girl is out to get me.
I think we better open it.
I think you need to go deeper. Have you ever done anything evil?
I thought you wanted to be an Evil Scientist.
I told you the 16 would work, you Igor.
I tried to be someone different, but the world wouldn't let me.
I turn the monster on the King.
I wanna go next!
I wanna go next.
I wanna live forever! I got plans! And dreams!
I want to be more as well,
I want to shove a pickle right where the sun don't shine.
I was about to ask you the same question, Malby.
I was never meant to be a scientist.
I was so deep down worried
I was the one who changed the channel on her brain wash.
I went to the evil bookstore and got you an inspirational poster.
I will never get the respect he gets!
I will not be beaten
I won't stop at just winning the Evil Science Fair.
I wonder what diabolical deed she has planned next.
I would do it myself, but I am all thumbs.
I would love to try something like this...
I...
I... I like kittens.
I'll come back and give you a beautiful funeral.
I'll go on strike.
I'm a failure. I'm a...
I'm a genius. What do you do, mister?
I'm an Igor.
I'm coming, Eva!
I'm coming, Eva.
I'm Eva.
I'm gonna go save him.
I'm gonna have the most Evil Invention of all time.
I'm gonna live!
I'm gonna unleash my winning invention
I'm guessing something big. Something like this.
I'm Jaclyn, your girlfriend.
I'm never gonna take this off.
I'm not evil.
I'm not his girlfriend.
I'm not psycho!
I'm not running a resort here!
I'm ready for my close up, Mr. Director.
I'm seeing a real Igor.
I'm sorry I lied to you. I lied to you about everything.
I'm sorry I'm late.
I'm sorry, you were saying?
I'm sorry.
I'm sure he's fine.
I'm using the 16 gigawatt, you fool!
I'm whispering to protect my voice.
If I had my shot,
If only I had a role I could really sink my teeth into.
If only I knew whether I had the "it" factor.
If only you'd made yourself indestructible!
If she ever
If she goes on a diet
If she's having a woman problem it's all yours.
If you didn't go psycho girlfriend on me right now.
Igor has someone else in mind for your role.
Igor is a liar. He does this...
Igor Krazy Straw! Right now.
Igor was right. You are not an actress.
Igor would never lie to me. Igor cares about me.
Igor, can you...
Igor, I felt like I was in a dark, horrible place.
Igor!
Igor!
Igor! Pull the switch!
Igor! Pull the switch!
Igors aren't allowed to invent,
In deadly hand to hand combat.
In four days, there is an audition for the lead
In other words, bon voyage.
In other words, buzz off!
In the biggest play to hit Malaria since...
In the Igor recycling plant!
Indestructible. Indestructible.
Ironically, at an inch tall, you still have the biggest mouth in Malaria.
Is Daddy still mad at me?
Is everything okay?
Is French fries an idea?
Is it about this situation?
Is it Annie?
Is it coconut ty? Coconut ty enough?
Is it even an idea?
Is it nice? You like t?
Is that all I am?
Is that even her hand?
Is that really nice?
Is the ultimate challenge for any modern actress.
Isn't it beautiful?
It could be in the form of a card or a poem, your choice.
It didn't kill anyone. And it actually tasted pretty good.
It is, right?
It looks kind of real, and it's hard because I would
It s in the other room.
It s so hard being a little hunchback.
It twisted like the pretzel, Igor!
It was just a suggestion.
It was nice meeting you.
It was only a vocal exercise, but that is a beginner's mistake
It wasn't always like this, though.
It would be really swell
It's a big step, getting a pet together.
It's a little kitten!
It's a necklace.
It's a new label for your jar.
It's a she, and I think someone's taken her.
It's going to be a bright, bright sunshiny day
It's going to be a bright, bright sunshiny day
It's going to be a bright, bright sunshiny day
It's Honkers the Gassy Monkey. But first, King Malbert.
It's just a role. You don't have to play it.
It's just failure after failure.
It's my Aunt Eva.
It's my turn! I wanna go next!
It's my whole life savings, but I think I'm going to treat myself.
It's over.
It's something no director can be without.
It's the annual Evil Science Fair!
It's the beacon of evil on top of the royal castle.
It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen!
It's true. You are good.
It's very liberating, Your Highness.
Ja, I haven't any idea.
Just breathe. Okay. Center yourself on the body.
Just like they do for the great Dr. Schadenfreude!
Just like you.
Just think Scamper. In a few short moments,
Just thinking about
Keep smiling.
Kill it, girl! Come on! You're a killer!
Kill it! Kill it!
Kill, kill, kill!
King Ma bert is making the storm clouds.
King Malbert has turned this country into a paradise.
King Malbert the liar is dead!
Leave it to Schadenfreude,
Legend has it when the smartest man in the world died,
Let me get this straight
Let me teach you how to jive and wail
Let me through! Let me through! I made her!
Let the battle begin.
Let's do the twist Around and around and around
Let's switch this around.
Let's talk about you, Igor. Do you think I have "it"?
Let's thank our guest who has taught us in one hour,
Life? Glickenstein invented ife?
Like a gentle fawn, I shall leave this meadow.
Listen, could you squeeze me in for a brain wash, too?
Lock your doors and hide your loved ones.
Long live King Schadenfreude!
Long live King Schadenfreude! Everybody!
Look at you. You are pathetic!
Look inside.
Look, Iggy baby I know all about Glickenstein and his deadness.
Look, it's your little girlfriend, Heidi.
Look, maybe I'm not a genius, okay.
Look, the Evil Science Fair is in a few hours.
Looking for the secret passage!
Maim it! Wound it! Insult it!
Majesty.
Malarians, let's get evil.
Malby? What's the meaning of this?
Master, the 21 gigawatt might be somewhat safer, I think.
Master!
May I suggest looking behind you?
Maybe it just spontaneously combusted?
Maybe some men like girls
Maybe they did too much?
Me, me, pick me!
Me! Me! I do.
Me! Me! Pick me! Me! Me!
Me?
Meanwhile, the scientists are in their locker rooms,
Mine's bigger than average, right? No?
Mmm hmm!
Monster want a brain wash?
Move it! I need this room.
Much better looking.
Mummy, Mummy, you were right!
My evil days are over!
My girlfriend Jaclyn.
My hunch.
My name is not Brian!
My new air freshener, "Dead Dog." Jealous?
My transducer!
Never gonna shake me
Never hurt anything real
Next!
Nice weather we're having, huh?
No can do, pal.
No Evil Scientist has ever been able to create life
No fair!
No matter how many Evil Science Fairs I win,
No more Doctor. Don't Kill Anybody!
No more pills.
No one's ever given me a gift before.
No, I was gonna say, "Wait I'm coming with you."
No, I'm not!
No, I've been trying to make you play a role that you're not right for.
No, Master! The rocket is going to...
No, no, no, that's not me, either.
No, no, no, you re wrong.
No, no, no!
No, no, no! You're evil!
No, no, no. The Evil Revered Igor von Igorstein III.
No, no, no. Wait! We need to unbrainwash her!
No, no.
No, not entirely.
No, she's not.
No, that's Brain. And he's not the makeup girl, he's the idiot.
No, wait! You'll spill on my plans.
No, you missed it, again.
No!
No! Please! No! No!
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No. Eva, you look... You look beautiful.
No. Everyone has an Evil Bone in their body,
No. Go away.
None of us do.
Not the smartest scientist.
Now get over there and pull the switch!
Now get over there and...
Now I can throw out that rug in the foyer. That thing is hideous.
Now I get to watch you die.
Now I'll just need a screwdriver, some nails and my bag of marbles.
Now to shrink Igor and steal his monster.
Now to take the old cow for a test drive.
Now try to remember on the word "tomorrow,"
Now, I know I m not the director but at the end of the number,
Now, to break into Glickenstein's castle
Number two friend. Well, who's your number one friend?
Obviously not.
Obviously, if I had more time, I would have made it flare out
Of course! This is what I've been waiting for.
Off to school for the first time.
Oh God, she's killing blind orphans!
Oh listen to me going on and on about me me, me.
Oh this is such a clich?
Oh you're upset, aren't you?
Oh, baby, won't you please come home?
Oh, come on!
Oh, excellent, wonderful.
Oh, excuse me. Sorry.
Oh, God. Did I hit it? Did I hit it? I hope I didn't hit it!
Oh, he's dead!
Oh, I wasn't at the door listening to you and Igor.
Oh, I'm sorry. I was just...
Oh, Igor. Ow! My ankle.
Oh, It's a great gig, especially if you're an Evil Scientist.
Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
Oh, my gosh! I don't believe it! What play is it?
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my hunch.
Oh, my necklace!
Oh, no, I'm not.
Oh, no, no. I do, I do.
Oh, no, this isn't happening. Act graceful. Act graceful.
Oh, no, who's that? What am I gonna do?
Oh, no, you're not. No wonder he chose Heidi.
Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh Got a pocket
Oh, oh, oh Never gonna shake me
Oh, oh, oh You can't control me
Oh, parlez Italian? Taco grande to meet you.
Oh, poopshkin.
Oh, really?
Oh, really?
Oh, really? How?
Oh, sorry, I thought we were counting off all your failures.
Oh, sure they've mutated life.
Oh, that's right, Master.
Oh, that's right, you don't work! So shut your cake hole, darling!
Oh, there she goes. Much better.
Oh, this is big. Schadenfreude's winning streak is over.
Oh, we're trying.
Oh, where did I put my glitter pen?
Oh, yeah sure. I've read about that in...
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yes, wait, it is the big, whopping stench of failure.
Oh, you guys are so lucky to have work.
Oh, you mean...
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Oh! Excellent. Thank you!
Oh! I mean...
Oh! My beautiful face.
Oh! She must be very special to you.
Oh! Time for my elocution exercises.
Oh! What play are they rehearsing?
Oh! You guys didn't.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh. Great. Hold on.
Oh. Was it?
Okay clearly her Evil Bone wasn't activated
Okay to the left. Very good. Now back to the right.
Okay, I get it. You want me to fix his invention.
Okay, now you're gonna march right back to
Okay, the Jacuzzi is not a bathroom.
Okay, things to do, sign up for yoga classes
Okay, we finished your costume.
Okay.
Okay. Frederick!
Okay. Monster,
Okay. Then you can be my number two friend.
On second thought maybe I'll stick around,
On the bottom of your screens.
On the count of three. One.
On the King's smug little face,
On three.
Once more, from the top, with feeling.
Once they see what I can do, I'll have a whole new life,
One wrong button and you'll just be watching regular cable
One.
Only one Evil Invention left.
Only one thing left to do.
Ooh!
Ooh! I have an idea!
Oops!
Open for the King!
Open your eyes.
Open yours, Scamper. It s a prehistoric evergreen.
Opening night presents.
Or do anything you can to control me
Or do you like me better as Heidi?
Or I'll throw you down the recycling chute
Or should I say "Brian"?
Or should I say actress?
Ouch!
Our gift?
Our life is a permanent graveyard shift.
Our work here is done.
Our work?
Ow!
Ow!
Ow! What is wrong with you?
Paparazzi! Why can't those vultures leave me a one?
Phew!
Phew!
Pick me up at 7:00. I'm gonna go home and shave.
Pickles. Old family recipe. Pickles.
Piggyback rides?
Play? What play is it?
Please pull the switch.
Please take it up with the head of my complaint department,
Please, please take your own sweet time! I'm loving it here!
Plotting their deadly combat maneuvers.
Possibly.
Practice poses for the red carpet,
Prepping their Evil Inventions!
President Igor, now that you're in charge,
Pull the switch!
Pull the switch!
Pull the switch!
Pull the switch!
Pull the switch!
Pull the switch.
Put the brake on, you...
Reach, Brain! Reach!
Relax, this is Glickenstein's castle.
Respect? Respect isn't gonna keep me in baby seal boots.
Respected, successful.
Right, right. The truth, that's a good option. Right, right.
Right.
Rise!
Rise!
Schadenfreude is getting too popular.
Schadenfreude!
Scratching my invisible...
See, that's what I'm talking about. Simple, elegant, classic.
See? You're jealous.
Seize him!
Seriously, Eva, this could be your big break!
Seriously, stop saying that!
She has got talent and you do not.
She must be making a club of flowers to smash us with.
She needs to commit an evil act,
She wouldn't hurt a fly.
She?
She'll never do it.
She's almost at her big finish!
She's as big as a two family house with a porch and a fence
She's enormous, colossal, tremendous, gigantic, immense
She's exactly like a watermelon
She's getting a little sweet in her old age
She's going to take this whole place apart.
Silence!
Sire, the clouds,
Small trumpet. Isn't that better? Doesn't that taste better?
Smart is not mouthing off
So how do we get this Evil Bone up and running, huh?
So I can watch Mr. Smarty hunch
So I'd like to, I don't know, evil her up a bit.
So it's actually a musical?
So many terrific girls got their start playing Annie.
So neat?
So not only is every other Evil Scientist smarter than you,
So technically, I'm the one who saved us.
So we stay on track, 'cause we're almost there,
So what do you say to that? Is that nice?
So you gotta hang on
So, citizens of the world, I beseech you...
So, how do you activate it?
So, how's your cocktail, Igor?
So, I have to step on people to get ahead?
So, this is my plan:
So, what do you do?
So, what's your Evil Invention this year, Doctor, kosher or dill?
Some may even scream when you smash them.
Somebody who'd go all soft and want to tell her the truth.
Somehow, I think he's missing more than his right hand man.
Someone can sing!
Someone has to beat him this year,
Someone who can snatch Schadenfreude's number one position
Someone who does not want your unique gifts to go to waste.
Someone's trying to shoot us!
Something went wrong and her Evil Bone was never activated.
Something! Kill it! Kill it!
Sorry Master. What did you say?
Sorry, Master. I was in the bathroom.
Sounds like someone likes them.
Sticks and stones are never gonna shake me
Sticks and stones are never gonna shake me
Still have a little job to do.
Stop the carriage!
Stop thinking like an Igor!
Stop touching it, Brain, I'm creating a look here.
Stop! You can both pull the switch.
Strike!
Stupid permanent marker.
Stupid remote!
Ta da!
Take a good look, world, any of these could be coming for you!
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Take me away Take me away
Technically, it's a secret staircase.
Tell him the truth. And if he kills us,
Thank you thank you. You're too kind
Thank you, Igor.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you. And who are you?
That can stand tall and fight for her.
That I'm the biggest Evil Genius of them all, and not just another...
That if anything ever happens to the three of us,
That is the correct answer.
That monster is about to be mine.
That said, there may be a genius this year
That Schadenfreude might finally get knocked off his perch!
That someone sent me this!
That the way to succeed is by doing evil.
That was close.
That was the first time he was right all day.
That way all of you will be close to my heart forever.
That when you opened the card I thought I lost you forever.
That's actually not a bad idea.
That's all I got. That pretty much sums her up.
That's better.
That's Brain, one of my other inventions.
That's Dr. Schadenfreude's invention?
That's for film.
That's for having a death wish. That's my thing.
That's French for,
That's it.
That's me. See? I look nothing like those other guys,
That's Scamper, one of my most successful inventions.
That's so evil! I mean, which is great, but...
The better I feed her
The better I feed her The bigger the figure
The better I feed her The bigger the figure
The better I feed her The bigger the figure
The better I like her
The better I like her
The better I like her The better I feed her
The better I like her The better I feed her
The bigger the figure
The bigger the figure The better I like her
The bigger the figure The better I like her
The bigger the figure The more I can love
The bigger the figure The more I can love
The bigger the figure The more I can love
The castle, got it?
The Desperate Hunchback Who Grasped at Straws?
The end of Malaria's evil role in the world.
The Evil Bone.
The Evil Invention last standing will be unleashed on the world.
The Evil Science Fair is in a week,
The Evil Science Fair is two days away.
The kind that crush you, kill you, bring you back to life,
The King's beacon is really a weather ray.
The leading lady falling for her director.
The monster. She isn't evil.
The only one getting knocked off his perch is you!
The only thing killed here is my dream.
The people might make him king.
The plucky orphan whose song of hope lifts the heart of a weary nation?
The props at the audition
The same thing he'd do if he found out I invented you two.
The source of all, the Monster's power,
The sun is on my side Take me for a ride
The sun'll come out
The sun'll come out tomorrow
The sun'll come out tomorrow
The tough, pants related questions of Carl Cristall.
The tower of the King's castle. Look, there's the Killiseum.
Then I'm Dr. Groaner's girlfriend.
Then I'm Dr. Nachtmahrs girlfriend.
Then kill you again, way worse.
Then you must have his jar.
Then, farewell, Igor.
Then, it was off to find a job.
There you have it. Another politician afraid to answer.
There'll be sun!
There's a place that I go Where nobody knows
There's always a secret passage!
There's gotta be a faster way to demolish this thing!
There's nothing more for you here.
They can't see what I really look like.
They come from all corners.
They didn't appreciate my creative style.
They get it all. They're the top of the heap.
They killed our crops, and our people became poor.
They live forever. I just want to make sure
They put his brain in a jar.
They'd all cheer my name
They're all worried sick about one thing, world peace.
They're not much, since I had to use stuff I found around here
They've blasted life into a million gooey pieces.
They've ended life.
Think? Igors don't think.
Thinking, breathing life that can destroy freely all on its own.
This has totally ruined my spa day.
This is a block for me but I will get through it.
This is a tough town.
This is not that brain.
This is outrageous! He has no proof!
This is the worst car service I have ever used!
This is why people are afraid of hunchbacks!
This isn't you, Igor.
This means you're through. Or should I say 'overthrown"?
This must be very embarrassing for you.
This would be the right time to curb your suicidal tendencies.
This. Right here!
Those are paper flowers the orphans sell.
Thought up a new way for us to make money,
Till there's none
Time for my crowning achievement.
Time to go. I have no time for cocoa or kittens!
To a happy ending.
To better days To better days
To better days To better days
To better days To better days
To better days To better days
To better days To better days
To help you steal inventions year after year.
To Igor School.
To plumb the depths of Blanche DuBois in Streetcar
To remind you to always take time in your day for a little torture.
To stop this gesture of goodwill right now
To the left, now back to the right. To the right. To the right.
To the man who has just found his way to take the throne.
To the right!
To the right!
Tomorrow
Tomorrow
Tomorrow
Tomorrow
Tomorrow
Tonight, we have a very special guest, someone we all love and respect.
Too bad he wasted his intelligence formula on me, too, Brain.
Too close?
Trust me, I'm the one who's gonna bring out the real you.
Ugh! Yuck!
Uh oh!
Uh...
Uh... Igor? Yeah. Where did the monster go?
Uh... Yeah that.
Um...
Unfortunately, the hunch on my back was a one way ticket
Unleashing pain and misery on everyone.
Until the mysterious storm clouds rolled in and never left.
Voil?
Wait a minute.
Wait, wait, wait, wait! Why does he get to pull the switch?
Wait, where's the remote?
Wait! This isn't you.
Wait! What's happening?
Wait! You should be sipping in style!
Wait.
Wait. Is it a beacon?
Wait. No kissing Heidi.
Was I too much? I was pushing, wasn't I?
We all were.
We are chasing after the bloodthirsty monster?
We did.
We invent them, and the world pays us not to unleash them.
We kick it, we slap it, we take it to the movies, call it Irene?
We need to get her to commit one act of evil.
We need to kick start it.
We trusted him and he lied to us.
We went that way!
We were a nothing country until King Malbert taught us
We were all thinking it. I just said it.
We're a lot alike, Igor.
We're all going to die! Except you!
We're here to rescue you!
We're not gonna make it! We're not gonna make it!
We've got Annie!
Welcome! To you and the millions of viewers around the globe!
Well, believe me, Igor and I are just friends.
Well, I hate to predict.
Well, I have to go get some rest for my audit on tomorrow.
Well, I'd rather be a good nobody than an evil somebody.
Well, if he's toast,
Well, if she comes back, we'll just tell her where to find you.
Well, in this world, nice guys finish last.
Well, of course it is. I've got a hunch on my back.
Well, of course, I would never wish the clouds on my people.
Well, our evil bun should be out of the oven soon.
Well, thank you for asking. What we're going to do...
Well, that is spoken like a true worthless leech,
Well, that was a short reign.
Well, then how can you play it truthfully?
Well, then maybe you should stay down there
Well, this time they really paid off.
Well, tonight, it's within their grasp.
Well, try a little bit harder!
Well, what are Brain and Scamper?
Well, where is it?
Well, with a little something I just stole for the occasion, okay?
Well, you're not used to high heels
Well, your troubles are over then,
Were they a blessing or a curse?
What a menagerie of mayhem loving monstrosities.
What are these?
What are you doing here?
What are you doing in the King's box, Schoddy?
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
What are you going to do now, smart guy?
What are you waiting for?
What are you? An imbecile?
What did this?
What exactly did you say?
What now, genius?
What the heck is that?
What the?
What?
What?
What? Like this is the first time I ve gnawed my own feet off.
What? No, you're not Eva.
What? What is it?
What? What? No. Everything is about pants.
What? What's the matter?
What? You're gonna lower yourself down?
What's my name gonna be? Kevin?
What's next? You're gonna pull out a guitar
What's that smell?
What's wrong?
Wheels failed me! Wheels failed me!
Wheels, don't fail me now!
When she came to life. That's it.
Where are we?
Where the rivers flow And I call it home
Where'd you put it, Igor?
Where's Glickenstein?
Where's Glicky?
Where's his proof? I demand to see proof!
Which is a hassle for me, since he never shuts up.
Which is kind of a hassle for him, since he doesn't want to live.
Who am I kidding? I can't read!
Who changed the channel?
Who doesn't like tortured kittens?
Who don't look like they've been put together at the junkyard.
Who says rabbits' feet are lucky?
Who wants to be a big movie star?
Who, by the way still has not helped me steal this year's winning invention.
Who's the big monster over there.
Who's the failure now, Mother?
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where are you going?
Whoops!
Whoops!
Why is everything about pants with you?
Why try to deny it? She's just what I like.
Why would you offer me an axe?
Will nothing end this vicious cycle?
Will pants continue to be as expensive and uncomfortable
Wish that you could But you ain't gonna own me
With an Evil Invention so revolutionary
With an invention more evil than his.
With your Igor, poopshkin!
Works for me.
Wow,
Wow, how interesting.
Wow, I don't know what it is, but I want one!
Wow, listen to that.
Wow, when it rains, it pours.
Wow. How avant garde.
Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I got the thumbs on sale.
Yeah, sure.
Yeah, well, here's more.
Yeah, whatever. You're supposed to smash it to smithereens.
Yeah.
Yeah. And if it doesn't work out, then we'll just adopt.
Yeah. Except in this version, Annie goes nuts
Yeah. Lucky us.
Yeah. Take Brian to Room Number 4.
Yeah. Trust me. You were born to be in this production.
Years ago, Malaria was a sunny land of farmers.
Yes or no?
Yes, as you've told us all over and over and over.
Yes, I am.
Yes, it is, because your voice is annoying.
Yes, Master!
Yes, Master!
Yes, Master!
Yes, Master!
Yes, right there.
Yes, she does! You're an Igor. She's an Evil Invention!
Yes, that's it! It's Annie!
Yes, you are! You're just a big, freaky...
Yes!
Yes!
Yes!
Yes! Yes!
Yes! Yes!
Yes.
Yes. And they're also going to fight back.
Yes. I know. They step on people to get ahead.
You always have company.
You are an ugly monster! You couldn't act your way out of a...
You better come inside
You can drop that slur around me.
You can't control me
You do wanna be my friend.
You don't have the guts.
You got my card.
You gotta jump, jive, and then you wail
You gotta jump, jive, and then you wail
You gotta jump, jive, and then you wail
You grab the girl of your dreams and you cha cha cha your way
You guys are my friends. So, you'll tell me the truth, right?
You have a very ugly face.
You just ate 10 minutes ago.
You just have to be born with it.
You just need to keep on winning
You know something? He's a good listener,
You know you can't get this part if you fake it.
You know, maybe if you were a real scientist,
You know, she may seem like
You know, to learn how to murder.
You made her?
You made my monster an actress!
You mean "stage left."
You mean Malaria, Master?
You need to be evil.
You need to give, just like we need to be evil.
You re supposed to crush the Evil Invention to your left!
You saved my life.
You should have built me with a longer arm.
You shouldn't really worry about labels, though,
You spent the entire time playing with a piece of ribbon.
You take a cocoa break,
You wanna waste your nephew's money like that? Huh? Huh?
You want to be trapped in an endless existential nightmare,
You want to overthrow the King?
You wasted your immortality formula on the wrong guy, Igor.
You were saying?
You win the Evil Science Fair,
You won't believe what you see when you look at her
You wouldn't need me to help you cheat every year.
You, sir, put the "Evil" in "Evil Scientist."
You! Go find me a 16 gigawatt temporal transducer!
You'll find your fortune falling
You're a monster.
You're a very good friend.
You're always a day...
You're correcting me?
You're either with me or against me.
You're hideous. You really are.
You're not wearing any, you know, pants.
You're not?
You're one to talk, Dr. Schadenfraude!
You're only a day
You're really gonna make this?
You're rejecting me?
You're so sloppy sometimes.
You're very welcome.
You've got your job, I ve got mine.
You've made me this delicious tea.
You've seen a lot of brains I'm sure.
Your Highness, Dr. Glickenstein is...
Your Highness, he's dead.
Your Highness, he's gone.
Your very large friend is a sweetheart.
Your whole lab is fake,
Yuck!
He lied to us. ...call the number
No. Good,
What? Hit me.
What? Yep,
'Cause your little daddy's gonna be all alone
"Happy Mother's Day. '
"Home For Blind Orphans."
"It's better to be a good nobody than an evil somebody."
"Please stop pelting me and my ridiculous hat with rocks."
"Sunday Night Massacre." No. "Arsonist."
"The greatest Evil Genius in the world."
"This card teleports your enemy to you so you can destroy him in person."
"Who is this strange woman living with Igor," right?
"Wish you weren't there.
"Wish You Weren't There."
(PENNIES FROM HEAVEN PLAYING)

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