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Home > Three Amigos (1986)
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Three Amigos (1986)

Three Amigos (1986)

Three Amigos is a comedy film released in 1986, directed by John Landis. This hilarious adventure follows the story of three silent film stars who are mistaken for real-life heroes by a small Mexican village. The film stars three comedy legends: Steve Martin as Lucky Day, Chevy Chase as Dusty Bottoms, and Martin Short as Ned Nederlander. Together, they portray the Three Amigos, a trio of bumbling, yet well-meaning, actors who find themselves caught in a dangerous situation when they agree to help the villagers fight off a bandit.

Throughout the film, the Three Amigos encounter a series of mishaps and misunderstandings, leading to a mixture of slapstick humor, wit, and charming performances. The movie is well-known for its quotable lines, memorable musical numbers, and the chemistry among its lead actors. The comedic timing and physical comedy make for an entertaining and lighthearted viewing experience.

If you're a fan of this classic comedy, you can enjoy and relive the laughter by playing and downloading the sounds from this timeless film here.

A box office failure. Nobody went to see it
A brave amigo
A car. A big, shiny, silver car.
A god? Well, I don't know about that.
A hundred thousand pesos
A hundred thousand pesos?
A little party my men are throwing for me.
A lot of champagne.
A man named El Guapo is threatening our very lives.
A plethora.
A toast to El Guapo.
A very great injustice is being done.
A what?
Afternoon.
Ah!
Ah!
Ah.
Ah.
Ah. This should do it.
All of the doggies are in the corral
All of your work is done
All right, we're gonna do a little number for you,
All right. We go east
All righty.
All the great Amigo pictures had one thing in common,
All the other little cowboys
Already?
Amigo money.
Amigo money. What we're talking about is money, real money.
Amigo, why you come here?
Amigos
Amigos, El Guapo himself is here, with all his men, just outside the village.
Amigos, we're always together
And a proportional system of government be established,
And amigos forever we'll be
And are looking to take it out on me?
And asked him for our Amigo costumes?
And at the end of the picture, you're friends.
And don't try to touch those guns!
And find out that, that person has no idea what it means to have a plethora.
And he will then show us the way to El Guapo's.
And I had never met her. I'd just known her from the films, you know,
And I just would like to know if you know what a plethora is.
And it will save you money.
And Mr. Flugleman says you're not to come back on this lot ever!
And put on a show of your strength and stop the...
And remember, wherever there is injustice, you will find us.
And she came up to me,
And she looked me in the eyes and she said,
And she looked me in the face,
And stay out.
And that will summon the invisible swordsman,
And that you've done. Now what?
And the rest of the boys,
And they called us scum sucking pigs.
And three,
And tonight, you are to be El Guapo's woman.
And we know what we're doing.
And we...
And will be amigos forever
And you and l might linger
And you...
And your family needs you.
And, uh...
And, uh...
And...
Another one of the goddamn gringos. Take this monkey away!
Anyone else with a comment?
Are you kidding? They're doing every cliché in the book.
Are you living in the studio mansion?
Arizona moon keep shining
As you Americans say, "We will play for keeps."
Ask for the money now, while they're excited.
Back in the bunkhouse now
Back there the Three Amigos are already dead.
Be redistributed equally among the people
Because nobody cares about three wealthy Spanish landowners
Been a long time.
Blue shadows on the trail
Blue shadows on the trail
Boys, boys.
Brother to brother and everyone
But as far as I can figure,
But as sure as my name is Lucky Day,
But could it be that, once again,
But could it be that, once again,
But first you're gonna help me, darling.
But I think you will like your other presents, too.
But I would throw it out there somewhere, maybe toward that tree.
But I'm pretty sure I can remember.
But it is nice to meet a fan. You know, often I think...
But it would be an insult not to offer it to them.
But remember, we're a bit rusty, so bear with us.
But then came Those Darn Amigos.
But try not to get into too much troubles, okay?
But you would be free to determine your own destiny.
By the time he's here, we'll be back.
By using the skills and the talents of the people of Santa Poco.
Call it etiquette, whatever. You know, I was thinking...
Can I have your watch when you are dead?
Carlos,
Carmen, the Three Amigos, I saw them coming out of the cantina.
Carmen, today is El Guapo's birthday,
Come and get them, guerito.
Come back, you cowards!
Come closer. I have something to tell you.
Come on, come on.
Come on, wait a minute! Lucky.
Come with me where moonbeams paint the sky
Come!
Come. We will take you to Santa Poco.
Consisting of three separate, but equal, branches,
Could it be because Carmen chooses to sleep in her cell instead of with you?
Could it be because you are turning 40 today?
Dear little buttercup
Dear little buttercup, won't you stay a while
Did you see a pair of cuff links? They were mother of pearl...
Do as he says!
Do not have your superior intellect and education.
Do not have your superior intellect and education.
Do you have a girlfriend back home, Dusty?
Do you have anything besides Mexican food?
Do you know this man?
Do you know what the word nada means?
Do you think they can protect us from El Guapo?
Does anybody have a watch, preferably one with a second hand?
Don't worry, Rodrigo, they will refuse it.
Don't you want to die like dogs?
Dorothy Gish, Lillian's sister,
Dorothy Gish. It's a true story.
Down.
Dream
Dream of someone
Dusty Bottoms.
Dusty, go on over to that piano.
Dusty, in famous is when you're more than famous.
Dusty, just relax and have fun with it.
Dusty.
Dusty.
Dusty...
Each fire one shot in the air,
Each of them filled with little surprises.
Easy.
El Guapo has taken everything.
El Guapo has taken her, too.
El Guapo is on his way.
El Guapo only kills men.
El Guapo will be interest to see me. I have something he wants.
El Guapo, he said to wait here.
El Guapo, they are everywhere.
El Guapo!
El Guapo!
El Guapo!
El Guapo's coming in a day or two.
Enjoy yourselves.
Enough!
Everybody!
Excuse me, did you say kill me?
Excuse me.
Excuse me. Are you the singing bush?
Excuse me. You are the...
Excuse us!
Excuse us. Are you the singing bush?
Faster!
Fattening?
Find these three gringos, open their stomachs,
First, we break into El Guapo's fortress.
For example, owning property.
For others, a lack of education might be their El Guapo.
For some, shyness might be their El Guapo.
For us, El Guapo is a big, dangerous guy who wants to kill us.
Forget it. If it's like beer, we'll have some. Three tequilas.
Forget it. My guess is this is the singing bush.
Forgive me, El Guapo. I know that I, Jefe,
From the desert sky above
Get wardrobe over here right away. Take the Amigos' clothes.
Get wardrobe over here right away. Take the Amigos' clothes. Well, we're taking them back. Sam!
Give me back his gun.
Goldsmith Pictures, Hollywood, California.
Gonna make it. Gonna make it.
Gonna make it. Gonna make it.
Gonna make it. Gonna make it.
Gonna make it. Gonna make it.
Gonna make it. Gonna make it.
Gonna make it. Gonna make it.
Gonna make it. Gonna make it...
Good night, Dusty.
Good night, Lucky.
Good night, Lucky. Good night, Dusty.
Good night, Ned.
Good night, Ned.
Good night, Ned.
Good? We were great.
Good. Neither does El Guapo.
Goodbye, Dusty.
Got it.
Grab their intestines, and squeeze the shit out of them!
Great job catching the food, Ned.
Great! I thought we were going to have a rehearsal.
Great! You've killed the invisible swordsman.
Great. No hotel. I could kill somebody.
Guapo, here come the guns!
Guns, so that the name of El Guapo will be hanging on everyone's lips.
Happy to.
Have you ever kissed a girl?
He does not kill crying women.
He has a plethora
He rides in, acts like he owns the place.
He said, "That'll be the day," Mr. Flugleman.
He was a god to me.
He was kind of hazy on the details.
He was the only one who could show the way. We're lost.
He will be here, Guapo,
He's dead, all right.
Hedges...
Hello? Hi!
Here we could be the Three Amigos for real.
Here you go.
Here, I want you to have my watch.
Here, I'll take that.
Here.
Hey, great.
Hey, I'm talking to you.
Hey, let's go get some more tequila.
Hey, Lucky.
Hey, we're just folks like you. Just relax.
Hey, what's going on up there?
Hey, where'd you get that pretty little gun?
Hey, why don't you come over here and sit on my lap?
Hey, you guys!
Hey, you, look! Up here!
Hey!
Hey!
Hey! Hey!
Hey! Look at the two little sissies!
Hi!
Hmm.
Hmm.
Hold it up! Higher!
Hold it! Hold it!
Hold it.
Hold.
How about you, Ned?
How can you tell?
How do you like your bat, Dusty?
How far do you think we rode before we had to go back and get directions?
How was I supposed to know where he was?
How will I know them?
Hurry up! Hurry up!
I am that fast.
I can't believe I'm doing this.
I do not know.
I don't know!
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't think you understand who you're talking to here.
I flew one in Little Neddy Goes to War.
I got a stopwatch.
I have a message for you.
I have had enough of these Yankees.
I have put many beautiful piñatas in the storeroom,
I have seen all of your films,
I have three demands.
I have your horses waiting. You must ride against them now.
I hope you will show them more courtesy than you have shown me.
I know each one of you like I know my own smell.
I know.
I like the one who's not so smart.
I like these guys.
I looked up to this man. I studied his every move.
I made it!
I meant that I would do that first, and then I would get a big, shiny car.
I never used trick photography.
I practiced every day for hours and hours.
I think Dusty's right.
I think it's a mail plane.
I think you misread who you're talking to here.
I thought we were quite good in it.
I wanna go with you.
I wanna show you something, honey.
I want these schmucks off of my lot.
I will see you in Santa Poco.
I would not like to think that a person would tell someone
I would not like to think that a person would tell someone
I would sooner die.
I'd just like to say, on behalf of the Three Amigos,
I'd like to continue to work for free, Mr. Flugleman.
I'll bet it's going to El Guapo's. Mount up!
I'll come back one day.
I'll drive all over Hollywood, show Flugleman a thing or two.
I'll help you.
I'll keep this.
I'll put "infamous El Guapo."
I'll throw a rock and distract him.
I'm drawing a line.
I'm Dusty Bottoms, and together we're the Three Amigos!
I'm gonna miss you, señor Dusty.
I'm gonna miss you, too, Pablo.
I'm gonna start a foundation to help homeless children.
I'm just gonna have fun with it.
I'm looking for a man by the name of El Guapo.
I'm meeting some friends of mine here.
I'm still here, El Guapo.
I'm telling you, I've been in this situation before.
I've been shot already.
I've never slept outside before.
I've seen it.
I've waited for years for this moment.
If I have to come into that cantina, somebody's gonna die!
If only we had known this earlier.
In a cottage built for two
In a way, all of us have an El Guapo to face someday.
In all those Mexican movies you made, did you ever hear that word?
In Germany, the cinema is very popular.
In the sweet by and by
Including when you were known as Little Neddy Knickers.
Infamous?
Is it fattening?
Isn't that a light chicken gravy that you...
Isn't that the Three Amigos?
It looks impossible.
It means "murderous, evil," all like you said.
It means "nothing, zero, zip."
It means, "Get on your horses."
It was my dream to be as fast as Ned Nederlander.
It was this man who inspired me to learn the art of the quick draw.
It'll be a cold day in hell
It's a "male" plane. And the balls...
It's a people idea.
It's a pleasure working with you.
It's a story a nation can sink its teeth into.
It's a sweater! It's a sweater!
It's just a coyote.
It's like beer.
It's like living with a six year old.
It's our only hope.
It's pretty much what we did in Shooting for Love.
It's real.
It's the Tuppan 601 we saw in Diablo.
It's what you're gonna have when I'm through with you!
It's what you're gonna have when I'm through with you! It means "nothing, zero, zip."
Jefe, the German arrived yet?
Jefe, what is a plethora?
Jefe, what is a plethora?
Jefe, what's his name?
Jefe, you do not understand women.
Jefe!
Jefe.
Just close your eyes and dream, little pal
Just kill one of them.
Just three or four miles.
Kill them!
L love you
Leave him here. He might like to see his friend die.
Let me just say one thing.
Let me prepare you for the way El Guapo makes love.
Let me see that.
Let me talk to him.
Let me talk to them, man to man.
Let's go find out where we're supposed to be.
Let's go summon the invisible swordsman.
Let's go to Santa Poco. They'll be glad to see us!
Let's go, Amigos.
Let's go!
Let's go.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Let's ride!
Let's ride!
Let's ride.
Like what, Jefe?
Line.
Lip balm?
Lips would be fine.
Little cowboy, close your eyes and dream
Long will the memory of the Three Amigos live in the hearts of the people of Santa Poco.
Look at the little fella. He's tuckered out already.
Look up here, look up here!
Look, boys, I know show business. Something always turns up.
Look!
Looks like somebody's been down here with the ugly stick.
Looks like there's about three of them.
Looks like we got another show to do.
Lucky, how's this show supposed to work anyway?
Lucky, I think maybe we should...
Lucky, I think maybe we should... What the hell are you talking about?
Lucky, those walls are 25 feet high.
Lucky's right. This is the only way.
Maestro.
Many piñatas?
Many presents have been coming for your birthday.
Medium rare.
Men or mice? What'll it be?
Misread?
Mmm, yeah.
Mmm.
Mmm. That's good. Very good.
Movie stars?
Mr. Guapo...
My God!
My little buttercup
My little buttercup
My little buttercup has the sweetest smile
My little buttercup has the sweetest smile
My men, my compadres,
Ned, land.
Ned, open the gates!
Ned, read those instructions again.
Ned, we could get killed.
Ned, what are you doing?
Ned, what luck! It's a Tuppan 601. You can fly one.
Ned! Ned!
Neddy!
Never make it, never make it, never make it.
New York. Maybe Paris.
Next time we come here, I'm gonna ask for a different room.
No dough, no show.
No friends. No women.
No kidding.
No place to live.
No self respect.
No stopwatch.
No, Flugleman hates us right now. He's never gonna give us our costumes.
No, I'm fine.
No, let's go tell El Guapo what we've seen here.
No, Pablo, there's still much to be done here. Your village needs you.
No, we will not die like dogs!
No.
No.
No.
Not a little sissy gun like this.
Not just any plane. It's a Tuppan 601.
Not so fast, El Guapo!
Not yet, El Guapo.
Now let me see here. We each have to fire one shot in the air,
Now they're over here.
Now they're over there, El Guapo.
Now they're over there, on top of the church.
Now they're over there.
Now we have all the Amigos. Take them away.
Now we'll never find El Guapo's.
Now, everybody, throw down your guns.
Now, that's something everyone likes.
Now, what is it that this town really does well?
Obviously not.
Of Little Neddy, Grab Your Gun,
Of many small villages.
Of many small villages.
Oh, dear little buttercup
Oh, dear little buttercup, l love you
Oh, great!
Oh, hold on. Wait.
Oh, little buttercup, you're a dream come true
Oh, my God!
Oh, no. I haven't played in so long. I couldn't, really.
Oh, yeah. Sure, lots of times.
Oh, yes, many.
Oh, yes, you have a plethora.
Oh.
Oh.
Okay, Amigos, this is it. Ned, big smile.
Okay, dig here.
Okay, now, everybody lay down and put your hands behind your head.
Okay, you go get the horses. Meet us out front.
Okay! Okay!
Okay.
Okay.
Okay. I give you the ten pesos version.
On a weekend in Manhattan.
On behalf of myself, Jefe,
One for each other and all for one
One hundred thousand pesos if you come to Santa Poco
One hundred thousand pesos if you come to Santa Poco.
One hundred thousand pesos.
One moment, please. I know who this man is.
One time Dorothy Gish was visiting me on the set
One, that you stop harassing the people of Santa Poco.
Or after I come back...
Or I'll fill you so full of lead, you'll be using your dick for a pencil.
Or you might be looking at three actors
Our reward is that justice has been done.
Ow!
Ow! Ow!
Ow! Ow! Ooh!
Paco!
Parties. Be a big shot for a while.
Pedro,
People of Santa Poco,
Perfect.
Perfect. Rodrigo said there'd be 50, now there's three.
Perhaps I can be of assistance.
Perhaps, señor.
Put him with the other Yankee maricón.
Put on show.
Put on show. One hundred thousand pesos if you come to Santa Poco.
Quick! You must dress in his clothes.
****d the horses!
****d the horses!
Real bullets.
Really?
Remember our film, Amigos, Amigos, Amigos?
Ride, Amigos, ride!
Ride, Amigos. Arriba, arriba!
Ride, caballeros!
Rode off on the women!
Rode off on the women!
Rodrigo, we will find the men we need in there.
Rodrigo.
Running everywhere, playing in the yard.
Sam!
Sandy and Irving are working on it right now.
Santa Poco is no longer under my protection!
Santa Poco!
Say the magic chant, and the invisible swordsman will appear.
Seize him!
Señores, we are from the village of Santa Poco.
Shoot them!
Shoot, shoot!
Shooting for Love, Wanderers of the West, The Ride of the Three Amigos.
Should we kill them?
So close your eyes and
So far, so good.
So give me a second to talk to Lucky, and I'll get back to you.
So go,
So long, El Guapo!
So that once again we can be a peaceful village.
So we have no further plan.
So what? They've probably done it a million times,
So, I just wait here then?
So, you thought you could outsmart the Amigos.
Soft wind blowing
Soft wind blowing
Some friends of mine will be coming here.
Someday the people of this village will have to face El Guapo.
Sometimes you can over plan these things.
Sooner than expected. I must warn the Three Amigos.
Sorry.
Stay.
Stop the...
Summon the invisible swordsman?
Sure. Sure, amigos.
Take him away.
Take it easy. Take it easy.
Take off your hat.
Take the gun! Let's go!
Telegram for the Three Amigos.
Tell me, Carmen, do you know what foreplay is?
Tell us we will die like dogs.
Tell us we will die like dogs.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you. Thank you.
Thanks.
That big yellow moon
That is impossible. No one can be as fast as you appear to be.
That occurred to me to do that at one point, too.
That the girl Carmen be returned to me unharmed.
That was a good trick, too.
That was some good trick.
That'll be the day.
That's a good plan.
That's Paco.
The Amigos are out of the mansion.
The German has the only presents I want, guns.
The German says to wait here.
The Holy Mother will help us.
The legislative, the executive, and the judicial.
The little balls hanging down.
The little... The balls. The mail plane.
The people of Santa Poco can conquer their own personal El Guapo,
The singing bush?
The Three Amigos,
The Three Amigos!
The three brave amigos are we
The town is yours, muchachos!
Then what happened?
Then, I found out about movie tricks.
Then, they got on their horses.
Then, you will be able to move freely in the courtyard.
There is nothing of yours here.
There is the German now, right on time.
There is the German now, right on time.
There they are, El Guapo!
There you go. You can sew.
There's a guard at every post. There's no way we'll ever get in there.
There's no hotel in this town.
There's something about this place. Everybody seems so grim.
There's...
They are coming! They are coming!
They are no better than El Guapo. They will not help us.
They are so brave.
They aren't as kindhearted as I am.
They better not try to cut our money.
They rode all over the town, shooting their pistols up in the air.
They want us to do the show now.
They'll never notice it.
They'll never notice it.
They're going to kill us.
They're over there, too.
They're over there.
They're really starved for entertainment around here.
They're really starved for entertainment around here.
Thirty three years old.
This is not a town of weaklings.
This is our village.
This is where we'll climb up.
This man El Guapo is not just famous, he's in famous.
This town is getting too rough for me.
This way, boys.
This way, boys.
This way.
Three Amigos.
Three wealthy Spanish landowners who fight for the rights of peasants.
Through the desert until we come to the singing bush.
Through the trees above
Through the trees above
To do a personal appearance with this guy El Guapo,
Today, he is...
Together, we...
Told you we were big down here.
Tomorrow, I will take 50 men with me,
Tonight, or I will kill her.
Trick photography. I was crushed.
Try and hit that... No, in the dry riverbed.
Turn on the lights.
Twenty three pesos.
Twenty three pesos.
Two, that all the land of Mexico
Uh, excuse us. We're not Mexicans.
Uh, this is real.
Up here, up here!
Us!
Wait a minute! You can't take our clothes.
Wait a second.
Wait a second.
Wait! There's a guard outside the door.
Want your wings?
We are honored to have you in our home.
We are looking for men who are brave enough to stand up to this tyrant.
We are men without homes.
We are proud to give you all that we have.
We are the Three
We are the Three Amigos
We are the Three Amigos
We can pay you 100,000 pesos.
We can sew.
We chipped in and got you this gift.
We come out, put on a big show, and pretend like we run him off.
We could take a walk, and you could kiss me on the veranda.
We crushed the federales on the plains of Oaxaca.
We do not have 100,000 pesos.
We do not have 100,000 pesos.
We don't have no beer, just tequila.
We fought together the priests of this mission.
We have a few items we want to straighten out first,
We have come here for your help.
We have heard of you.
We have seen your deeds and think you are very great.
We might as well do it now.
We must make him welcome.
We must make him welcome.
We never really had time for that sort of thing, being so busy.
We only have ten.
We send you boys to Baja and we shoot the picture in eight days.
We shall see.
We strayed from the formula, and we paid the price.
We want to defend ourselves. But how?
We were meant to wander.
We were wondering if you could tell us where the best hotel in town is.
We will fight like lions.
We'll give them about 30 more seconds. I hope those horses they got for us are okay.
We'll just get our things and go.
We're from out of town.
We're gonna have to figure out a way to get inside.
We're movie stars.
We're not gonna get paid, that's for sure.
We're not gunfighters.
We're very, very sorry and we'd like to go home now.
We've got to get back to basics,
We've no jobs. No money.
Welcome to Santa Poco.
Well, didn't you notice its little balls?
Well, good night.
Well, I talked to Rodrigo tonight. He's the kid.
Well, I thought that maybe you and I could...
Well, if there's any way of avoiding that part of it...
Well, not exactly. Actually, my stuntman did.
Well, not this time. Dusty, cover El Guapo!
Well, so long as we've got some time to kill, I think I'll have a beer.
Well, that was a long time ago.
Well, they're just intimidated. They've only seen us on the big screen.
Well, we really didn't expect the first part of the plan to work,
Well, we'll start to get ready then.
Well, we're just gonna have to use our brains.
Well, we're taking them back. Sam!
Well, you dirt eating piece of slime, you scum sucking pig,
Well, you slime eating dogs,
Well, you told me I have a plethora,
Well, you told me I have a plethora,
Well?
What about that guard?
What about you?
What am I doing in Mexico?
What are we gonna do?
What are you gonna do with your share of the money?
What can you say about such men?
What did he say?
What did he say?
What did I tell you?
What do we have to go back to?
What do you mean?
What do you think?
What does that mean? "In famous"?
What is happening around here today? Are gringos falling from the sky?
What should we do, El Guapo?
What the hell are you talking about?
What the hell is happening around here?
What was that noise?
What was that?
What we have done, we have done together.
What we're talking about is money, real money.
What, now? Here?
What?
What?
What?
What? What?
What's it doing here?
What's tequila?
When do you think Carmen will open up her flower to you?
When Harry Flugleman lets an actor tell him what to do!
When Harry Flugleman lets an actor tell him what to do! It'll be a cold day in hell
When the flower is ready, it opens itself up to you.
When they get here, tell them to wait.
When we find the singing bush, we say the magic chant,
When you want a woman, you just take the woman.
When you want cattle, you take the cattle.
When you want food, you take the food.
Where are you?
Where did you get those clothes, from a movie?
Where'd you get that pretty little gun?
Where's Carmen?
Where's our tequila? We're waiting!
Wherever liberty is threatened,
Wherever liberty is threatened, you will find...
Wherever liberty is threatened, you will...
Wherever there is injustice, you will find us.
Wherever there is injustice, you will find us.
Wherever there is suffering, we'll be there.
Wherever there is suffering, we'll be there.

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