Step Brothers Movie Soundboard Edit

Alright, here's a scenario for you Dad. Suppose Nancy sees me coming out of the shower and decides to come on to me. I'm looking good. You gotta luscious V of her going from my chest pubes down to ...

Alright, that's it. That's it. You too, guys, leave me no choice, no television for a week. What we are so serious you are fucking hot. I love your mind goes in Roberts while saying it's gonna stay...

Ask I like making sex with you, I do, but you're also married. It's over this is crazy. I'm a mother of two children. Have a husband a beautiful home. Can't be fucking around. No, it's fun. It was ...

But I want to be honest with you. I really need a job an I will take any position as long as it doesn't involve having sex with old ladies for money or bear traps. Those are my two bugaboos.

Can Jag alones your failure Boo, you're embarrassing yourself. You geriatric fuck Payton who thank you, keep your liver spotted hands off my beautiful mother she's a safe and then you sit down to w...

Cooking kettle one. It's the fucking Catalina wine mixer. Stop fucking Catalina wine mixer.

Dad is fat is so bad there's blood everywhere. Why did why did you guys do that is so bad?

Dad, we're men. OK, that means a few things we like to ship with the door open. We talk about Pussy going, riverboat gambling trips. We make our own beef jerky. That's what we do. And now that is a...

Dale was telling me that he's really into Kung Fu and I was telling him that you're really into comfort as well. Have a Greenbelt? Read it and weep. I don't believe in belts. There should be no ran...

Damn, your something you are something you something too I wanna roll you into a little ball and shove you up my vagina you could live there it's warm it's cozy and Regina how to walk around with y...

Does any foods that you like I suggest you put your name on them or they will be thrown out by me. Houses built in 1825 by General Custer Wanna Show you this room hold up Ho ho you see this room ye...

Eat shit, Derek.

Feel, feel like a lightning bolt. Hit the tip of my penis, yeah, yeah.

Fuck you Dale

God, I don't know what it is about your face, but I wanted to deliver one of these right in your suck hole. Is there anything I can do to work on that? So, not really. It's your face and I again yo...

Guys guys guys we can't have no penis kind of dreams you guys having.

Ha ha ha that's so funny. Last time I heard that I laughed so hard I fell off my dinosaur's.

Hey Derek Sprechen ZE Dick.

Hey Derek, you know it's always good for shoulder pain if you lick my butt hole map.

Hey man, did you touch my drum set? No, 'cause it's just weird. 'cause seems like someone definitely touched my drum set. Yeah that is weird 'cause I didn't touch him. Did you touch my drum? Set a ...

Hey Tiffany might know what I got a crush soul. You mentioned that earlier.

Hey, I'm Brent. No most common Dragons. You have to call me Nighthawk.

Hi Dale, can you make me a grilled cheese sandwich? Sure, no. Delta State. He's testing you to see how much you can get away with icy hungry look in your right hand.

Hi Hun, I'm Alice I'm derek's wife. Is it true that you struck Derek and face and he fell from the tree house? Yeah he asked me to send this amazing thing I've ever heard. I want you to know that t...

Hi, my name is Jim. Wanna suck my Dick for money so it's just me.

Hold on, we're not going on the boat, Derek selling the house. We have to go to therapy. What the fuck happened, hey?

Holy Santa Claus shit.

Horn, like it, drops out myself. That's a guys like you gave you fucker.

I can sing too. In fact, I sing right now if you wanna get down on these hairy balls waiting to jump battery. Yeah, it's across party right up in here why don't you lick on this big John? Stop it d...

I cannot stress this enough. It is not your fault. Whose fault is it? Fucking? Hell, let's cut this shit is it is directly your fault. Robert, you destroyed my boat, you beat me up in your sleep an...

I couldn't eat another bite of Turkey without thinking of you inside of me. Come on, let's try something illegal.

I didn't want Salmon I said four times.

I know it seems hard, but it's the best thing for both of you. We do it because we love you that I'm doing this because I love you. Fuck you.

I know said there's a long gap in your job history and it said wait two years you went Kerouac on everyone's eyes.

I'm not going to call him Dad Brennan. You're 39 years old. I would not expect you to call him Dad. Well, I'm not going to ever. Even if there's a fire, Robert better not get in my face and I'll dr...

I'm saying I think you gotta think about your options. I know that you are technically married now, but that does not mean that they have to live here.

Industrial strength night vision goggles Holy Santa Claus shit. Can you imagine if we had these were 12? Even better we got him when we're 40.

It's about time what the hell is going on. Mr Mac? OK, Dylan, I was just calling me Mr Dilbeck. Sorry OK Mom, go back. We think it would be very prudent. Can we turn our beds into bunk beds? Yes, w...

It's just like cold case files. This is like OK smiles Mr. Cycle game files. People die everyday. Proper burial, unmarked grave.

Let's play game all right on the count of three. Name your favorite dinosaur. Don't even think about it. Just name it ready. 123 Velociraptor favorite non pornographic magazine to masturbate to Goo...

Listen, I'm sick of being all coy and bashful. Dale OK we're in the bathroom really you could do that let me just help oh it's all slippery Oh my God.

Look at, I'm not great at this hallmark stuff, but running when I look at you now, I don't want to kick in the head quite as much. Thanks man. That was beautiful. Then what do we do now? We could h...

Look, I didn't touch a drum set. OK, I witnessed with my eyes your testicles touching my drum set alright that's it that's it.

Mass no, it's OK that mines not movie quality.

Mr Hub Mr. Gina is ready for your interview, actually will be interviewing as a team. We're here to fuck shit up.

Mr Huff, under your references you listed Dale Dobak, which I know is this gentleman. But you also listed Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior. Yeah yeah we are looking for people we can contact.

Now let's move on to other business.

OK, here's the shot out of a cannon. Oprah Barbara Walters, your wife, you gotta fuck one. Marry one Kill 1 go.

OM, Brennan Denise called and she said she can't go out with you on New Year's Eve because she's not your girlfriend. She's your therapist. Is that what she said? Yeah, she's a Rascal.

People talking how can power people? I just don't know but they keep us saying we laugh just a little too LA we Stan just a little too close. We stay here just a little too long, maybe there seeing...

Pirate hats.

Quack.

Robert, mom. Derek is my girlfriend, Denise. I, how are you actually? I'm his therapist. We are in absolutely no way dating Brennan told me he was going to hurl his body off a helicopter into shark...

Rock well.

Santa Maria I'll do you in the bottom while you're drinking, sangria, nachos, lemonheads. My dad both. You won't go down. We sail around the world and go for support every time I come I produce a q...

So I thought we begin talking about your parents divorce. OK, how old were you when they got divorced? 15 It's a hard age. Yes, yeah, do you want to talk about some of those feelings? I love you. O...

So they I don't know how much you know about therapy, but usually starts by you telling me a little something about yourself. I work at a college as a janitor, you know, I feel like I'm smarter tha...

So you're a bear. Sing yourself you geriatric fuck.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but I'm gonna kick you repeatedly in the falls Gardocki.

Still hate you, but you got pretty awesome collection of nudie mags. Yeah, I got him from the 70s, eighties and 90s like masturbating in a time machine.

Still, what have you been working on recently? Well, I manage a baseball team Little League Fantasy league.

Sure.

This house is a fucking prison on planet bullshit in the Galaxy of this sucks camel Dicks.

This is going to sound weird, but for a second I think you took on the shape of a Unicorn. I felt like I was hovering above my own body watching myself sing.

This isn't me. I'm fucking miserable. I had to get up at 10:00 o'clock this morning.

Those are my two bugaboos.

Today I saw my own son use the bicycle as a weapon. You yelled **** at the top of your lungs. Well, I honestly thought I was going to be ****d for a second. He had the craziest look in his eyes and...

We should do this again. It was very constructive.

We're here to fuck shit up.

We're not like you were grownups, motherfucker.

What do you think Brennan? So scared right now I'm just going to want to do what's sensible. I'm going to file for unemployment and I'm going to try to get a job at Enterprise Rent-a-car because th...

What is this? What's happening? What Robert is trying to say is that we are getting a divorce. Don't do this. No, no, I gotta say I could have called this one. No, yeah, that are full. You are bad ...

What the fuck happened, hey?

What was he doing here? We're putting the house on the market where we moving. Is the house haunted?

Where are you going going upstairs? 'cause I'm going to put my nut sack on your drum set. OK, you do that. I am warning you right now. If you talk to my drums I will stab you in the neck with a knife.

Where did you go to medical school? He went to northwestern and Johns Hopkins. Is that good enough for? You know, it's not well Brennan. Those are very prestigious schools. I smoked pot with Johnny...

Whoa, see that black smudge right there on the blade? Yeah, look at it closely. Pretty recognizable signature no. Randy Jackson from American Idol. While you have Randy Jackson's autograph on a mar...

Would you think Bran thought you were incredibly brave and I mean that in strictly the most clinical and professional sense possible with no emotional, intimate, sexual or any other undertones that...

You and your mom are hillbillies. This is a House of learning doctors. You're not a doctor, you're a big fat, curly headed fuck. Oh yeah, I'm a girl yeah fuck yeah, you better not go to sleep. This...

You both know this is completely fucked up right? Yeah of course. But Brandon sure can wear the shit out of that pirate hat.

You gotta know, I'm not just some guy Brennan that is the voice of an Angel running. I can't even make eye contact with you right now. Your voice is like a combination of Fergie and Jesus.

You keep your liver spotted hands off my beautiful mother she's a St.

You know what I got for Christmas across Seoul?

You see that white dog crap? Do you see it? Yeah, not too fun down. There isn't no you see your actions have consequences when you oppress people, they rise up in the fiery anger.

You sit down to write daily bread a check for $10,000 barbershop. One of those fake hearing devices so far up your ass. You can hear the Saudi are small and tested as a producer's shit.