Disenchantment (2018) - Season 1 Edit

A delicate flower like yourself has no place aboard...

A fairy? Maybe she can help us. Do you do magic?

A king? From where?

A lot of people died for it.

A noble's daughter from a far off land,

A real elf, that is.

A real legendary caper. We could use your help.

A real nice place with ponies, or whatever crap you like.

A shiny gold Zog to whoever seizes the elf.

A war you'd have to fight with most of your cabinet turned to stone.

A way in.

A weird ghost guy is attacking and complimenting me.

According to the holy books, your first mistake was educating her.

Actually, "well" is a bit of an overstatement.

Actually, "well" is an overstatement.

Actually, a lot further?

Actually, I'm sorry. That's just so heavy, you know?

Actually, it belonged to my no good ex husband, Malfus.

Actually, sorry, I'm late for a crusade.

Affection.

After my brother was poisoned, I'd been so careful,

After my mom died, I felt like I didn't fit in anywhere, really.

After the witch imprisoned you for so many years.

Ah, also maybe.

Ah, Beanie, it's so hard to know what to do without yellin'.

Ah, come on!

Ah, Dagmar, you were my perfect queen.

Ah, fascinating.

Ah, here we are.

Ah, I should've done something earlier, but now, I got no choice.

Ah, I shoulda never let you glue those stars on your dunce cap.

Ah, I'm just screwing with you, liven things up a little.

Ah, my dreams are this close to coming true.

Ah, no one's too creepy for my daughter.

Ah, now we're talking.

Ah, only weak minded men fall for that.

Ah, screw team spirit. Those elves stole my stash.

Ah, that unforgettable stench of manure and boiling cabbage.

Ah, that's why humans tend to avoid it.

Ah, there you are, my love. I've come to take you back to our wedding.

Ah, to hell with it. Bean may be crazy, but she's right.

Ah, to think all the classy old bats in this family led right to Bean.

Ah, whatever. I'm gonna go lay down in the window.

Ah, you. You ruined everything I worked for.

Ah, your talking cat's here to keep you company.

Ah!

Ah!

Ah!

Ah! Uh.

Ah! You can't do this, man. I want my lawyer.

Ah.

Ah. Let's have a look at this no good pile of scum.

Ah. Not so hard!

Ah...

Ah...

Ahh!

All aboard the party barge! I hope you like fun and soggy pretzels.

All hail Dankmire.

All hands, brace fer mermaids! And their irresistible song.

All I care about is this sweet, precious elf.

All I wanted to do was dance in the arms of someone beautiful,

All I've ever eaten is candy.

All in.

All it took was one drop of elf blood.

All right, but I'll need 20 minutes and a big glass of milk

All right, favorite food on three.

All right, I know you're still in shock that my mom is back.

All right, the creepy laughter has to stop before we can have a real conversation.

All right, we got a big day tomorrow. Let's grab one last drink for the road

All right, you did good.

All right.

All right. But you'll come get me later?

All right. Stick her down there, and bring me a nice hunk of Gorgonzola.

All right. Well, I'm off to get my first job, guys.

All right. Wish me luck.

All that malarkey with the magic elf blood actually paid off.

All the confetti cannons in the world couldn't save us now.

All the money I poured into yelling at you.

All this time I didn't know I had a son!

All this wedding hassle for a stupid political alliance?

All three? Even smoke?

All we have to do is find a way out before they...

All will be forgiven as long as you obey the Jolly Code.

All you need is my guidance.

All your favorites: poached dodo eggs, unicorn bacon and waffles.

Allow me. [grunts]

Allow this girl to resume her humble life of obedience and sobriety and chastity.

Almighty ball, is Oona still in Dreamland?

Almost everyone's dancing. [chuckles] I mean...

Almost.

Along with this priceless sack of elf.

Also of Dreamland.

Also practical.

Also, they're kinda plague y and I just..

Am I a bad person?

Am I not a real elf?

Amused by your wittle twousers.

An elf with a human girl? That ain't right.

An exorcism, huh? [groans] I don't like the sound of that.

An eye. Your eye is missing!

An old girlfriend of mine used to work the mountain.

And a bunch of friendly drunks down at the pub.

And after all that, we fell for each other, hard.

And after you kill him we can hide the body.

And all it took was some loving banishment.

And all of a sudden, she gave me a right hook,

And by season, I mean fall or summer, or whatever this is.

And Dankmire and Dreamland share the beautiful canal

And do you, Princess Tiabeanie, a single woman,

And drive him mad with your indecisiveness.

And elves are never supposed to bring outsiders.

And even if you do find a way to live for eternity,

And even then, it was one guy.

And find Elfo!

And gravy.

And help me up, I'm beetle ing.

And her smart mouthed cat, too.

And I am not letting him stand on my feet again.

And I came out perfect.

And I didn't want you to feel guilty.

And I enter a state of semi permanent pregnancy...

And I got roasted alive. I guess we all did our part.

And I never have to work. And people have to do what I say.

And I promise to never have another drink.

And I thought, what if our love could actually be eternal?

And I would never call you that even if you were!

And I'd like to lock you in the tower until we sort things out.

And I'd risk their lives on it.

And I'll finally get the respect a man of my hat deserves!

And I'll try to decipher your accent?

And I'll use them to bite out your spinal cord.

And I'm like, "Now where am I gonna live?" Rude.

And I'm not going anywhere without you, Bean.

And I'm not just making it up on the spot.

And if we succeed, how shall I be rewarded?

And in this kingdom, that's sayin' something.

And it only got perfecter

And it says...

And it's charting a course for Mermaid Island.

And keen to experience more of your local culture. What's next?

And leads to the decay and ultimate collapse of civilization.

And may all ill will between elves and humans be behind us.

And may I say what a deep honor it is to assist His Majesty in this most...

And maybe on the way, yourselves.

And mocked me ruthlessly

And my beloved Dagmar was turned to stone.

And my daughter has a dangerous drinking problem."

And my daughter has a dangerous drinking problem."

And neither of these looks like me.

And now for Elfo...

And now you got bupkis!

And now you shall lose a foot,

And now you're never gonna un know it.

And now, our guests of honor.

And now, the main event.

And on the exhale, Elfo will tell us more about his girlfriend.

And once he found the Eternity Pendant, things went south.

And Queen Dagmar? [laughs]

And Queen Oona is the mother of Derek, the heir to the throne.

And remember everything from the night before.

And replace them with worse ones.

And say something I'll have figured out by the time I get there.

And see if there's any attractive singles in our area waiting to talk to you.

And she lives beyond the Unpassable Mountains?

And she never does neither. Gimme my damn scepter.

And she was all I'd ever wanted.

And since that time, I've become less and less important to you

And so is mine, if you live.

And so the demonic binding begins.

And some would say overflowing with revulsion...

And spend my remaining years tending to my twin sister who lives in the attic.

And take Elfo, so I know you're not having any fun.

And that, my friend, is how one returns a gift.

And that's [stutters] I don't want to marry this pig.

And that's when I discovered

And the bar is closed.

And the marriage of convenience.

And the one surefire way to unleash your creative juice is with creative juice.

And the residents were instantly turned to stone.

And the rest of you, too. [groans] Odval, you're in charge.

And the smell of horse.

And the tell tale odor of Dreamland ditch weed.

And the war only ended when a certain King Zog of Dreamland, your dad,

And their contents.

And their son slash nephew,

And then the pressure to sustain the lie? Oh, God, it was a nightmare.

And then the witch kidnapped you?

And there's nothing he hasn't touched,

And there's only one way to find the answer.

And there's something huge on top of me. Feels like a bear!

And this is the iron maiden, and this is the book of golf jokes.

And this one's so poisonous you can't even hold it in a bottle. [chuckles]

And thus, the 500 year war was over,

And to find a boyfriend who's a great listener.

And under the table.

And we only lost one man. That's actually not bad.

And we'll be taking these nice horsies.

And we'll track down Oona.

And wear it around from time to time, so people think he's still alive.

And weren't sure our 17th dog was going to solve our problems.

And what a lovely tunic.

And what is your charge?

And what you got are serious problems in the face and body areas.

And whatever that thing is you said about your mom.

And whenever you're ready, we'll get you a new pet.

And while I am a fan of such worlds,

And who are you, that you passed through the Single Trap with Two Parts?

And who is that?

And who knows what I'm gonna do to you now. [chuckles]

And who's that statuesque sugar stack?

And would a racist do this?

And you ain't coming back 'til you appreciate

And you allowed that amphibian to raise my precious Tiabeanie?

And you and I can look at each other and try not to laugh.

And you don't want to mix those up, believe me.

And you took that away.

And you were there and... Oh, drugs are bad.

And you, you're so kind,

And you. You're not at all what you seem. You're a prince.

And you. You've only got bigger...

And your hair smells like butterscotch, but you're wrong!

And your name is Sven and you're a Viking,

And your necklace. And didn't you have...

And your pet swans? And your little sled for your toy bear?

And your sassy friend, the talking cat.

And, Elfo, it's like you don't appreciate your assembly line job.

And, time permitting, meet you.

And?

And... doink.

Announcing the King and Queen of Bentwood,

Any attack against Queen Oona

Any one of us could be next.

Any other requests?

Anybody looks at her, they get their head chopped off.

Anyone not tied down better plug your ears.

Anyone seen Sorcerio?

Anyone want this meat? I only eat it for the shells.

Anything but the Pepper Jack.

Anything goes!

Anything goes.

Anything?

Anything... goes.

Anything's safer than guarding that princess.

Anyway, enough about every detail of my life.

Anyway, I've read it before.

Are we standing in that moment right now? Maybe.

Are you kidding me? This stuff looks amazing

Are you Malfus the Philosopher?

Are you saying I'm some kind of hero?

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Are you trying to say testicles?

Are you turning green? Or were you already green?

Aren't ambassadorships usually just given to rich chumps

Arms up!

Arr, you'll want to put the wax in before you hear me answer.

As a friend and lover, there is none truer than you.

As ambassador, I have to remind you

As Elfo nears it, the vial will give off a tone.

As I flush out your demon.

As I take this boot and all that's within it.

As I was saying,

As it happens, sire,

As long as everyone remains absolutely silent.

As long as it's not..

As Merkimer's fiancée, I'd like to say a few words.

As the subject of barbaric medical experiments...

As they inevitably will,

As you reach maturity, you will notice many more changes.

As you wish, Father.

At least give us something to remember you by.

At least I'm not ugly on the inside.

At the sound of the gong, let the ritual begin.

Attention on the party barge!

Aw, aren't you sweet, darling?

Aw, baby's cranky. Baby does need a nap.

Aw, Beanie. If there's anything I can do...

Aw, here's the world's smallest lute

Aw, I think he looks cute, like the mayor of Babyville.

Aw, I'm not a god.

Aw, jeez. What are you doing?

Aw, that sweet, poor little bastard with the funny head.

Aw, yes, you are.

Aw! Really?

Aw.

Aye, 'twas held together mainly by stains.

Aye, their siren song is done for now.

Baby doesn't wanna get killed by her daddy.

Back looks good. And just a cursory glance at the bottom tier.

Bad Elfo doesn't really exist.

Bad shot, mate!

Bah!

Bah! To hell with them!

Be careful what you wish for.

Be gone, damn you!

Bean hasn't been the same since she lost her mom.

Bean, did... did you just kiss me?

Bean, do you prefer Elfo?

Bean, go to your room while we decide what to do with you.

Bean, I should've confessed this a long time ago, but I was too ashamed.

Bean, I'll miss you!

Bean, it's really you.

Bean, look at me. Don't look at me, look at the corpses.

Bean, no!

Bean, thank this nice creep so he'll move along.

Bean, wait. If we come home without the vial,

Bean, you doing anything weird in here I should know about?

Bean, you ever see a guy eat a whole chicken?

Bean, you have so much to learn and many wonderful things to see.

Bean, you poor baby!

Bean, you're a natural. And I've seen you torture.

Bean!

Bean!

Bean! Bean! Grab my hand! As your future husband, I command it.

Bean! Behind you.

Bean! If you're out there, say something!

Bean! No!

Bean?

Bean?

Bean? Bean?

Beanie, make with the eulogy already.

Beanie, make with the eulogy already.

Because I had a great idea.

Because inside there is pain.

Because she is legit and totally real and very special to me!

Because sometimes I feel like a freak, too.

Before I left, I didn't have any idea that my size, my stature, was...

Before spending the rest of your life with the boring, bossy me.

Before today, we had neither riches nor magic.

Behold, guys, the Elixir of Life.

Behold, sire, as I extract a small quantity of blood.

Behold! The Lost City of Cremorrah!

Belay the whacking

Believe me, I kept her on the straight and narrow.

Better than bridesmaids. Better than mothers

Big gal like you like parties?

Big Jo.

Big Jo.

Birdman, activate!

Blasphemer! How dare you bring logic into God's house?

Blessings to you, from your greasy hair to your filthy, ripped up shoes.

Blood ponchos! Get your blood ponchos!

Blood pressure steady as I enter and...

Brace yourselves for the inevitable visualizations.

Bring in the hot tar!

Bunts?

Bunty has been turned to stone, and I just...

Bunty? Why are you throwing trash out your window?

Bunty. Still adorably dim, I see.

Bup, bup, bup. Who has the stick?

Busy. We're at war here.

But a lot of times, people look up from what they're doing.

But against whom, sire?

But all frolicking stays within castle walls.

But as time went on, I was so happy, I just sorta forgot.

But at least we have the elf.

But at the same time, you're being looked at by me

But because Bean had switched the glasses, I lived,

But before we marry

But could you come throw a wet blanket...

But do you? Don't answer unless it's yes.

But he would continue to listen outside the door, unbeknownst to the princess."

But I can't if they're all so scared of my stupid dad.

But I devoted my life to her. I...

But I didn't tell you my name.

But I guess we'll just always be ugly beasts to you.

But I know one thing, and I know it real good,

But I must warn you. He creeps even me out.

But I think she was just being an attention hog.

But I think we can all agree one thing:

But I'm going back to dinner. I'm so hungry.

But I'm gonna need you to jump up and down. Like a monster.

But I've brought up a bottle from the cellar.

But if Bean hadn't switched the glasses around, I'd be...

But if I talk with confidence, you dopes will believe anything I say.

But if it's too snug, you can give it to your fat, wimpy son.

But if you don't find him, maybe I'll introduce you to my son.

But if you ever wanna throw a ball around sometime...

But in the end, it's just a bunch of unprovable nonsense.

But instead of looking for him, I could just hire you

But is this what water's supposed to look like?

But it is your duty as a princess.

But it will come at a great cost!

But it will do you no good to get that vial.

But it's a rather delicate diplomatic mission.

But it's not ham.

But it's not working.

But look. There's a complication. They've been joined by a tiny dork.

But maybe that isn't what you wanted to be.

But more importantly, I am the one and only Luci.

But my mom never lost her head.

But my one solace is knowing I can return to my beautiful candy home.

But not before I got rid of that infernal vial!

But now I'm a pig, and my life's a mess.

But now those things are gone and so are the ladies.

But now, it's all a pipe dream.

But science suggests a more logical explanation:

But she's hurtin'.

But the dangers of Mermaid Island be all too real.

But the eye's not working yet.

But the king wasn't here.

But the worst lies ahead!

But their kingdom is rich in... Well, riches.

But then I shave my head like a true artist.

But then it didn't, so we split.

But these new tests shall reveal its restorative powers.

But they don't like me.

But they really were the best months of my life.

But they're lost, so, it'll be Turbish and Mertz.

But we can mount a crusade to find the vial.

But we can mount a crusade to find the vial.

But we do know of its most recent location.

But we do know of its most recent location.

But we humbly offer it for your sustenance.

But we looked, and it's not there.

But we mustn't let this grave occurrence weigh down our somber hearts.

But we really need to save our friend.

But we'll be okay.

But we're singing.

But what do you expect from someone who's got no control over her own destiny?

But when you two are making love, is she aware?

But yes, definitely.

But you don't have to worry. I won't try anything like that again.

But you have a hidden rage inside you that no one else can see.

But you haven't said anything yet.

But you look like sweet kids. You ever heard of the Wishmaster?

But you were too in love to see it.

But you wouldn't know that because you never asked. Rude.

But you'll never know the truth unless you return to Elfwood.

But you're already... All right.

But you're back!

But you're the only one in here!

But, at one point, I got my head stuck in her eye socket.

But, first, we go live to the courtyard for the return of the knights.

But, hey, hey, hey, Bunts...

But, hey, I escaped and ended up here,

But, ho! Some hair has sprouted in his ear.

But, no. No, not for this guy.

But, with no army, they were forced to resort to magic.

But, you know, I think maybe I...

By a lunatic who doesn't work for the spa?

By a ruthless enemy who will stop at nothing. My wife!

By appointing Ambassador Tiabeanie,

By drinking any old liquid.

By order of your father, you will stand aside, Tiabeanie!

By someone with this symbol on their wagon.

By street dogs.

Called it. Knew it by the pants.

Can I do the thing about having him for dinner?

Can I go, too?

Can I show you around?

Can we have this conversation sitting down?

Can we try running it back a little further?

Can you hear me?

Can you imagine such disrespect?

Can you just tell me about this place,

Can you maybe save this for later, when I can appreciate it?

Can you pass me a pillow?

Can't stand in the splash zone without a blood poncho!

Cancel all other quests.

Candlestick in the conservatory? Candlestick in the face?

Candy? Are you a king?

Careful where you grab me. I grab back! [chuckles]

Carousing, taking her clothes off every chance she gets.

Cash. Leave it on the branch.

Cat thing, I've always been my own man, never needed others for advice.

Certainly no religious sex magic rituals.

Chicks love pathetic.

Children, this is Princess Tiabeanie.

Chowder? It doesn't always have to be nautical references with me.

Civilizations were decimated. History rewritten. Maps redrawn.

Clearly, his people had a wild wingding while he was away.

Clearly, the volume of blood was inadequate.

Clothed and fed and built the finest luxury cage for,

Come along.

Come back later with an open mind.

Come on, Dad. What am I?

Come on, Dad. You can't stand in the way of true love.

Come on, drink up.

Come on, guys.

Come on, hurry up. Hide!

Come on, I dare you to try it.

Come on, man. Parties are where heroes are born.

Come on, this is it.

Come on!

Come on! This is a burglary, not a family reunion.

Come on. Go.

Come on. I'm encouraging you.

Come on. It wasn't my fault. I was just giving orders.

Come on. Liven it up a little.

Come on. This way.

Come on. We've got a long way to go to the Wishmaster's lair.

Come taste my knees, 15 cents.

Come with me!

Come, the candy inside tastes much better. Less bird droppings.

Come, Zoggy. Make a toast.

Coming through. Here she is.

Conceal thyself, demon.

Congratulations, guys.

Congratulations, Your Highness.

Considering that twerp is heir apparent to the throne

Cool night air, sky full of stars...

Cough it out like a demonic loogie.

Could this elf's blood be the key to my wildest dream?

Could you ever go out with a guy who's dinky?

Couple of wallflowers, standing over by the snack table eating chee...

Covering up the indiscretions of those in power is an important part of the job.

Cram him in a cage!

Cremorrah was a kingdom of unimaginable wealth... of snakes.

Cremorrah?

Crime is male dominated, innit?

Cursed are those who consort with demons.

Dad tried for years to find the Elixir of Life.

Dad, come on!

Dad, don't be ridiculous.

Dad, why are you talking like that?

Dad, you can't just cage him. Elves are jolly by nature.

Dad! Dad! You're not gonna believe this! Open up!

Dad?

Dad.

Daddy Elfo, um, slapped me on the bum bum.

Daddy, please, I've learned my lesson.

Daddy, please, I've learned my lesson.

Daddy, why is she going so slow?

Dagmar is the love of my life.

Dagmar?

Damn it!

Damn it! Drop another one!

Damn small print. This had better be the right one.

Damn. Well, it's gonna be another long, lonely night

Dance? Why, I'd be delighted. I love to dance.

Dark chairs.

Deal. Just help me clean.

Deals are made, wallets are lost, people hook up.

Dear God, you've mangled my exquisite face!

Dearly beloved, as we stand here in this overly large building,

Death? No, they'll just all fall into the ocean.

Designed to make us feel small and inadequate,

Dibs

Did anything similar to this fall in?

Did I say I wanted a talking horse? [grunts]

Did I say my party? I meant thy party.

Did it work?

Did you ever stop to think that's because it's true?

Did you know Dreamland forced Dankmire to build this canal?

Did you know that pigs are 80% blood?

Did you make sure to add extra frosting?

Did you wanna maybe dance? No, me neither.

Didn't agree with him, though. Step around and come in.

Didn't you always want a husband that screwed 30 walruses?

Difficulties lately,

Dim as the day is long, Your Majesty.

Ding, ding, ding! Whoo!

Do I detect some kind of mallow? I wanna say marsh.

Do I have an audience with the king this morning?

Do it. Do it, do it, do it!

Do you have any last words?

Do you know what I did for you? What I gave up to get you back?

Do you like ham? This is like ham, but it's not ham.

Do you like short conversations with interesting people?

Do you miss those?

Do you need to be alone?

Do you, Guysbert, most Exalted Prince of Bentwood,

Do you, Prince Merkimer of Bentwood...

Does this voice sound familiar?

Doing God knows what with that elf.

Doink.

Don't be a dummy bear. Elf is dessert meat. It's still cooking.

Don't be modest. You killed these mentally ill siblings fair and square.

Don't be rude, Dad. Let's respect the customs of our colorful hosts.

Don't be sad.

Don't bother. I can't hear nothin'.

Don't flatter yourself, Princess.

Don't forget to take it easy today and drink plenty of water.

Don't give away the game. When Germans laugh, people get nervous.

Don't know how long that is, but you have three days.

Don't let the drawbridge hit your ass on the way out. Ow!

Don't listen to him. You're obviously a great couple.

Don't look at that. You didn't pay for it.

Don't panic. We can slip away unnoticed

Don't rattle the clamps. It enrages me.

Don't say courting. No one's courting. But you can bring me a drink.

Don't touch me.

Don't worry, Ma. I won't let her get away with it.

Don't worry, my liege. His lack of blood has put him in a delirious state.

Don't worry. Every visitor to Dankmire receives a famously warm welcome.

Don't worry. We'll make your cheeks look nice and rosy.

Don't you need something?

Don't you want a magic daddy?

Dreams come true, 'cause I am a solo act now.

Drink the fairy! Drink the fairy!

Drink, sneak out, fib.

Drinking wine with a demon. Not exactly the wedding day I wished for.

Dude, decide what you want, drink till you have the nerve to go for it,

Dude, keep your cape on. Look at the stuff in his nest.

Dude, the truth has been right under your nose the whole time,

Dude, you can't have elf esteem. You're not an elf.

Duh. I already know.

Duh...

Edgar the Fearless is now Edgar the Headless.

Eh, easy. Kill Zog, hollow out his corpse

Eh, I've beheld better.

Eh, Mrs. Mertz looked at me like she was gonna say something.

Eh, teenagers... [chuckling]

Eh, this thing had it coming.

Eh, we gave it a shot.

Eh, we'll give it to Bean.

Eh? [laughs]

Eh? Huh?

Elf defense? Try self defense.

Elf, actually. Common mistake.

Elfo and I had only been friends for a few months,

Elfo and Tess!

Elfo grounded me in reality.

Elfo has been kidnapped!

Elfo has left the building with Bean.

Elfo is dead because of you.

Elfo is hereby banished from Dreamland.

Elfo risked his life getting you that stupid vial!

Elfo will need someone to dance with,

Elfo, don't freak out. Just stay calm.

Elfo, get out of my room.

Elfo, I didn't know you were coming back.

Elfo, I owe you an apology, man. I totally saw your girlfriend back there.

Elfo, I'm gonna kill you.

Elfo, I've never said this before, but I can't go all the way.

Elfo, it's okay, really.

Elfo, Luci, let's show these yokels how we city folk do things.

Elfo, no! It is forbidden.

Elfo, speak to me. Elfo!

Elfo, stay with me

Elfo, that's not possible.

Elfo, this is not over! Stay... [muffled grunting]

Elfo, you came back.

Elfo, you mofo.

Elfo, you mustn't be here. This is an ancient secret society

Elfo, you scrub the blood off the walls, and I'll sweep up the crushed pretzels.

Elfo, you'll die out there.

Elfo! Elfo!

Elfo! No!

Elfo! Where are you?

Elfo? Oh, my God, where are you?

Elfo. Elfo, knock it off. Gimme my tail back.

Elfwood! We're here!

Elves haven't been seen in centuries.

Enough rigmarole. Bring in the blushing groom.

Enough! No more time for parlor tricks.

Entertainment is just a tool that pacifies the masses

Eternity shall remember the names of Sven and, uh...

Even after the application of all three sciences.

Even farther.

Even though much of his time was spent

Ever since they were invented five years ago.

Every time I turn my head away, something bad happens.

Every time that girl gets a little responsibility,

Everybody have fun at work today. Alfred, don't suck on your pickax.

Everybody, sit down. [chuckles]

Everyone line up single file to get lashed to the masts.

Everyone will understand why you went crazy

Everything is riding on this speech. Luckily, Dad gave me his notes.

Ew. Dad, think out the words before they come out. It's...

Ew. Look at that gross, crying pig. I have no interest in it.

Exactly. Once the flesh is burned away, the demon is revealed.

Excellent. I've asked the eminent Lord Lingonberry

Except my best friends and my worst enemies.

Except my daughter and my wife. And now you.

Except that one over there, with his head in a bucket.

Except the thing that says I'm a king!

Except, this time, watch from over here.

Extra strong Dankmirian Schnapps

Eye of newt, tail of newt,

Failed to find the vial and we lost the princess...

Failure slash quitter slash loser. The triple threat.

Faster, Porky!

Father, stop!

Father! To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?

Fear not, Princess.

Feed you to the monster raw.

Fetch Old Man Touchy from the dungeon!

Fighting, competing, winning.

Find him, and it, and them!

Find the king, find the vial

Find the vial, and we find Elfo.

Fine

Fine, but I'll need a little something to put the edge on.

Fine, fine, on with the whacking.

Fine, fine. Steak. I want steak for my last meal. Okay?

Fine. I can make it on my own. I don't need you. I don't need anyone.

Fire the cannon!

First of all, sweetie, shut up.

First that little guy, now you two? [chuckles]

First up, not a ghost.

Five, six, seven... Oh, nuts.

Flesh burn, demon return.

Fly!

Follow me, darling. We'll be completely safe up here

For a made up girlfriend? Cool.

For a shilling I can engrave it with the name of an unloved one.

For centuries, no elf has ever left Elfwood.

For days, you don't eat, you don't sleep, you don't throw bricks at seagulls

For God's sake, I'm a grad student.

For His Majesty's blessing and immediate confiscation,

For me?

For now.

For older women who like to cackle. Is that it?

For one night, we get to do whatever we want.

For our kingdom is rich in tradition,

For outstanding bravery, foresight and wisdom,

For starters, you should have put on the black hood before coming out.

For the first time in my life, I feel completely calm and...

For the last time, they are not feathers. I am not bird type!

For the people snatching witch!

For there lurk the twin shores of Mermaid Island and Walrus Island.

For what can and cannot happen would help us..

Forty five years of necromancing has led me to this moment.

From the tip of your pointy tail to the tips of your pointy ears.

From their quest that we all privately thought would fail.

From what?

Gah! Quit judging me, Dad

Get comfortable. You ain't never getting outta here.

Get down there and dig a pit for us to sleep in.

Get down there and dig a pit for us to sleep in.

Get him outta here!

Get out. Run! Save yourself.

Get outta here!

Get ready to have your minds blown.

Get ready. Next week, we're gonna try arson.

Get those little bastards.

Get used to it,

Ghosts are losers that got murdered.

Giants haven't been on a rampage since the '80s.

Gimme the thing, will you?

Give her a break, okay?

Give it back. Give it back to me. [grunts]

Give me your hand in marriage, Bean.

Glad to hear it.

Go ahead, sire. Don't ask about my fourth eye!

Go ahead. Say it.

Go on now. Down the hatch.

Go ruin someone else's life.

Go!

Go! Go use them on yourself or whatever.

Go! Go use them on yourself or whatever.

Go. Find your friend.

God damn it!

God damn.

God forbid you lose control and jump overboard.

God knows, as my daughter, you'll have plenty when you're older.

God, what did they marinate you in, man? It smells out of this world.

God, you're selfish and cruel.

God!