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Herbert from Family Guy, seasons 3 to 6, features distinctive gray hair and a quirky, mischievous smile.

Herbert Sounds: Family Guy - Seasons 3 to 6

Audio from Herbert of Family Guy, including newspaper and ice cream sounds, and more. Audio is from Seasons 3 to 6 of the show. John Herbert, nicknamed "Herbert the Pervert", is a fictional character in the animated television series Family Guy. A pedohebephile who is attracted to young boys, he harbors unrequited love for Chris Griffin. Herbert has received mixed reviews from critics.

NSFW Audio: Use caution, some sounds may be offensive
A martial law.
A martial law.
Ah.
Ah.
And don't you mouth off to me or I'm gonna slap you right in your penis.
And don't you mouth off to me or I'm gonna slap you right in your penis.
And it plays a tune that's fun for the young children.
And it plays a tune that's fun for the young children.
And you need to come on down to the cellar. I got a whole freezer full of popsicles. Hmm.
And you need to come on down to the cellar. I got a whole freezer full of popsicles. Hmm.
Better go get that.
Better go get that.
Bringing the good news today.
Bringing the good news today.
But I can't wash myself.
But I can't wash myself.
But I'll take this teddy bear, this ruler, this piece of string and this cardboard box.
But I'll take this teddy bear, this ruler, this piece of string and this cardboard box.
Call me.
Call me.
Come on over here, son.
Come on over here, son.
Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da.
Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da.
Don't make me beg now.
Don't make me beg now.
Excuse me?
Excuse me?
Get your fat ass back here.
Get your fat ass back here.
God my toy forest got my best, best. All I need now is the boy. God must drivetime got my hopes high. I got the time and the place and I got rhythm. No need is Chris to go with them. Stop here, we ...
God my toy forest got my best, best. All I need now is the boy. God must drivetime got my hopes high. I got the time and the place and I got rhythm. No need is Chris to go with them. Stop here, we ...
Got a nice tip for you right here in my pocket, but my arthritis. Why don't you reach in there and fish it out for yourself?
Got a nice tip for you right here in my pocket, but my arthritis. Why don't you reach in there and fish it out for yourself?
Guess who?
Guess who?
Haha
Haha
Hammer the paper so I don't need to use my grabber.
Hammer the paper so I don't need to use my grabber.
Haven't seen a newspaper in a couple days, wondering if you ever gonna come back.
Haven't seen a newspaper in a couple days, wondering if you ever gonna come back.
Hello there Kyle.
Hello there Kyle.
Hmm.
Hmm.
Hmm.
Hmm.
Hmm.
Hmm.
Holy moly, it must be my birthday.
Holy moly, it must be my birthday.
How do you feel about those computer websites that put a Blue Square on the home of a sex offender?
How do you feel about those computer websites that put a Blue Square on the home of a sex offender?
I could use a strap in young man to do some chores around my house.
I could use a strap in young man to do some chores around my house.
I got a whole freezer full of popsicles. Hmm.
I got a whole freezer full of popsicles. Hmm.
I guess we gotta find some other way to spend our evenings.
I guess we gotta find some other way to spend our evenings.
I hope you don't find the money strapped to my thigh.
I hope you don't find the money strapped to my thigh.
I know what boys like. I know what guys want. I know what boys want. Boys, right. Boys like me.
I know what boys like. I know what guys want. I know what boys want. Boys, right. Boys like me.
I see you're wearing your big shorts with the baggy leg holes that flood us so carelessly in the breeze.
I see you're wearing your big shorts with the baggy leg holes that flood us so carelessly in the breeze.
I think you're a real nice guy, but I just decided to go with another paper.
I think you're a real nice guy, but I just decided to go with another paper.
I was starting to think you weren't coming.
I was starting to think you weren't coming.
I'm afraid I'm gonna have to cancel my subscription.
I'm afraid I'm gonna have to cancel my subscription.
I'm looking for a car that's been tricked out to look like an ice cream truck.
I'm looking for a car that's been tricked out to look like an ice cream truck.
I'm so tired of you.
I'm so tired of you.
Is that my phone?
Is that my phone?
It must be my birthday.
It must be my birthday.
It seems you son Spaceball broke one of my Windows Father Day.
It seems you son Spaceball broke one of my Windows Father Day.
It's a bad day for me.
It's a bad day for me.
It's bath day.
It's bath day.
Jackpot.
Jackpot.
Jason.
Jason.
Just lonely here.
Just lonely here.
Knowing about him with a pair of strong young hands to help me in and out of the tub.
Knowing about him with a pair of strong young hands to help me in and out of the tub.
Looks like the good Lord just sent me a conversation starter.
Looks like the good Lord just sent me a conversation starter.
Make sure you stretch out those creamy hamstrings.
Make sure you stretch out those creamy hamstrings.
Missus Griffin.
Missus Griffin.
No, no, no. No. No. No. No. No. No. No, No, no no.
No, no, no. No. No. No. No. No. No. No, No, no no.
No.
No.
Not for you, Shelly.
Not for you, Shelly.
Ohh jackpot.
Ohh jackpot.
Ohh rats.
Ohh rats.
Ohh who needs them?
Ohh who needs them?
Ohh yes boys. We can settle this like reasonable and sexy teenagers.
Ohh yes boys. We can settle this like reasonable and sexy teenagers.
Ohh, don't make me beg now.
Ohh, don't make me beg now.
Ohh, you're starting to piss me off you little pig. Let some bitch.
Ohh, you're starting to piss me off you little pig. Let some bitch.
Ohkay.
Ohkay.
Or tied in a nod. Your choice.
Or tied in a nod. Your choice.
Perhaps we could work something out.
Perhaps we could work something out.
Punishment.
Punishment.
Sighing
Sighing
So no hard feelings.
So no hard feelings.
Sorry to leave you so many messages.
Sorry to leave you so many messages.
Soy Jesus.
Soy Jesus.
Thank you.
Thank you.
That just decided to go with another paper.
That just decided to go with another paper.
That sounds fun.
That sounds fun.
That's a nice muscle throwing on you got there.
That's a nice muscle throwing on you got there.
There's no police here to help me.
There's no police here to help me.
These little piglets. Some bitch.
These little piglets. Some bitch.
Thinking about the Muslim paper boy Wishing he'd come by and bring me some good news.
Thinking about the Muslim paper boy Wishing he'd come by and bring me some good news.
Today was a good day.
Today was a good day.
Uh, yeah. I was just wondering, uh, well, where the newspaper boy was.
Uh, yeah. I was just wondering, uh, well, where the newspaper boy was.
Uh, yeah. I was just wondering. Uh. Well, where the newspaper boy was.
Uh, yeah. I was just wondering. Uh. Well, where the newspaper boy was.
Uh, yes Sir. Yes I have.
Uh, yes Sir. Yes I have.
Uh, yes, Sir.
Uh, yes, Sir.
Want to come over for some tea and cookies?
Want to come over for some tea and cookies?
We can settle this like reasonable and sexy teenagers.
We can settle this like reasonable and sexy teenagers.
We don't stop the clock until the door closes.
We don't stop the clock until the door closes.
What's going on in my pants? Looks like we got six more weeks of winter.
What's going on in my pants? Looks like we got six more weeks of winter.
Where are you?
Where are you?
Whoever can swallow the most Tylenol, PM wins.
Whoever can swallow the most Tylenol, PM wins.
Why I'm saying it's fun to stay at the Why MCA? Hmm.
Why I'm saying it's fun to stay at the Why MCA? Hmm.
Why the long face?
Why the long face?
Wishing he'd come by and bring me some good news.
Wishing he'd come by and bring me some good news.
With colorful pictures of ice cream treats.
With colorful pictures of ice cream treats.
Would you like to come inside for a cupcake and a glass of wine?
Would you like to come inside for a cupcake and a glass of wine?
Y'all know what day it is.
Y'all know what day it is.
Yes.
Yes.
You know, if you get sweaty and want to take your shirt off, that'd be just fine.
You know, if you get sweaty and want to take your shirt off, that'd be just fine.
You know, with colorful pictures of ice cream treats.
You know, with colorful pictures of ice cream treats.
You like popsicles?
You like popsicles?
You're a 17 year old girl and I don't need you here.
You're a 17 year old girl and I don't need you here.
うん、うんうんうんうんうん。
うん、うんうんうんうんうん。
はあ。
はあ。
無効。
無効。