The Great North - Season 1 Edit

A "Meet and Meat" singles mixer tomorrow night

A And also, no frickin' way.

A Are you guys singing?

A bamboozled Mom and two perfect weddings.

A billion kisses in real life.

A bouncy ball and a plastic spider ring

A bow for an extra $3.68.

A brother and sister whose parents desperately wanted them

A bunch of meat from local hunters.

A cool guy high roller, but mostly I just get very drunk.

A detached motorcycle seat, Uncle Mike.

A full and productive life with you.

A full answer at the raffle tonight.

A full day out on the fishing boat with her brothers and dad.

A ghost grabbed my butt!

A gift certificate is so obvious.

A goodbye disco, because of how we kill and eat them.

A group to paint a new mural over the old one

A guest? Now? It's nearly 7:50.

A hideous testament to your passion.

A hundred bucks? A hundred fifty?

A little help, please?

A lot of Andre the Giants,

A lot of feet, not a lot of socks.

A lot of letters, not a lot of envelopes.

A lot of men, very few women.

A lot of prairie dogs, not a lot of prairie dog holes.

A million kiss emojis isn't cool. You know what's cool?

A monster covered in urine!

A mural of all the different fingers and finger styles

A nice comfy sleeping hole.

A passion that eventually led him to become a schoolteacher.

A personal thermos of hot chocolate.

A quick round trip to Anchorage.

A romantic dinner party where we can celebrate our cool,

A selfie with the seals. I I like to call them sealfies. Heh.

A shadow wedding, or really any shadow event,

A single boot was left on her lawn."

A slightly too large appetizer platter.

A sophisticated, big city woman.

A squirrel couldn't have done that.

A week on a mountain wearing only leaves and bark?

A woman's body is her own dominion.

Aah! Aah! Ouch.

Aah! No, fire! We'll melt!

Aah! Oh, my God! Broken foot.

Aah! Wrong leg!

About being the mural.

About dating and kissing.

About getting into a steeply embanked ice chasm voluntarily?

About having to rush back to Hollywood?

About her mall job yet,

About how you moved to Fresno with $30 in your pocket

About living in these woods, I should tell you about the time

About that invitation to go on a date...

About that moose taking Mom's stuff.

About the date or the job?

About the Feast Cake or the Cake Lady

About the groovy finger mural, she stopped by to check it out.

About the new generator model coming out next week?

About the protest mural and said we absolutely can't do it.

About this very fun dating opportunity

About what you said up there about not being special:

About whose bologna is whose around here.

According to the website, the next ferry comes at...

According to Zoya, he's been hanging out there

Actual birds involved as one might think.

Actually that's not true.

Actually, Ham, your cousin Becca's gonna be in town.

Actually, he fell asleep. (gasps) Or died?

Actually, I was thinking I've already won it

Actually, it's yours Jude ly who'll be doing the heart breaking today.

Actually, Jerry, as long as we're stuck here,

Actually, Moon, you better take a look at this.

Actually, now that I think about it,

Actually, you kind of remind me of him.

Add a flat Coke, add two cups of sugar,

After all this time.

After fish after fish

After fish after fish

After fish.

After it wandered into the hospital

After school, we should help Dad practice dating.

After they stitched his head back to his neck.

After we fell down the hill, Beef. You don't remember?

After we finish one of the ones I've been dreaming of.

Again. Damn it, this sunset sail

Against those belted pads in the women's bathroom.

Aggressive bait theft.

Ah, but that's enough ribbing.

Ah, Chez Ham.

Ah, for a second, I thought, "Santiago,

Ah, good morning, imaginary best friend/inspiration

Ah, I am drinking my hot milk.

Ah, I wish I could, but I got

Ah, it's fine. Who's gonna know?

Ah, man. That'll be my ex wife

Ah, my apologies. I'm Hayward Melm,

Ah, my receipt?

Ah, pleased to meet you, Beef.

Ah, some food. Oh, an old TV Guide

Ah, sounds like you're both pretty accomplished outdoorsmen.

Ah, that'd be Doris, my, uh, cameraman.

Ah, the fiancés are up.

Ah, they're lost in that snow.

Ah! I can't wait for my family

Ah. I'll side hug him first thing in the morning.

Ahem. "This weekend, someone knocked down

Ahoy, captain. My brother and I need to take

Aka best friend and...

Alanis Morissette.

Alanis, I would love to talk about him again,

Alanis, it's official.

ALANIS: Oh, here we go.

Alaska broken.

Alaska isn't for everyone, Jer.

Alaska one, Jerry zero.

Alaska's not so hard.

Alaskan twins don't let each other

Alive or dead.

All day on this crazy barter chain

All I ask is that next time you listen to me from the beginning.

All I see is white. It's like when I met your family!

All my other words are frozen.

All right, Dad.

All right, Doris, start the camera.

All right, I guess I could dash one more year.

All right, I'll tell everyone that the shadow wedding's off.

All right, I've chopped this month's wood,

All right, let me just transfer

All right, let's all split up and look for him.

All right, let's jump in the van and head up

All right, the first challenge is a 90 foot tree climb. And go!

All right, uh, someone give me a suggestion.

All right, w w wait. Okay.

All right, you can be my Obi Dead Kenobi.

All right! Let's get down to hanging out.

All right. Well, we got to go find him.

All that was, no longer is.

All that was, no longer is.

All that was, no longer is.

All the crimes that have happened in town the past week.

All those years was just a fake.

ALL: But she can't silence our collective vagina.

ALL: Sliders!

ALL: Sunset sail!

ALL: Sunset sail?

Almost all counted down. We'll never make it in time.

Almost. Also, all the blood's rushing to my butt

Already had beef with Beef.

Also, Debbie Gladu says that Bigfoot is for little kids.

Also, Ham and Moon might not be able to take

Also, honestly, I thought Alaska would be mostly hot chocolate

Also, I am gay.

Also, I'd really love for him to stay.

Also, nobody needs to take over the store anytime soon.

Also, to be honest, it was a lot of hair, Judy.

Also, your hands are dumb, you smell like chili,

Always listening with his Alexas.

Alyson said I need to let him go.

Alyson, you need to work on how you using that word.

ALYSON: Are you kidding?

ALYSON: But look at my hair, Jerry.

ALYSON: Those are bangs, Jerry.

ALYSON: You have to set him free, like a bird!

ALYSON: You know, Billy Zane

Am I just some sort of, like, square who likes to paint?

An absolute gladiator carrying this?

An after school program to paint a new mural

An emergency family meeting.

An expertly thrown stone on pebbled ice?

An intruder? Is it go time?

An unknown mystery baker has been fulfilling her orders

And a beautiful office supply store.

And a bolt of "uncut velvet d****ry"?

And a broken heart, and my one job

And a bunch of his gorgeous blond hair

And a deep insecurity about my identity?

And a solid plan to meet family standards

And a Sprite chaser, and then

And a very little bathroom with a very small shower.

And after she went to the big house,

And after that, we should go see who set

And after, we got Whale Tail Ice Cream.

And all of a sudden you had me drowning in the "Bube."

And all our memories are here.

And all the crazy stuff we used to do together,

And all these wins, I had lost the thrill of true hardship.

And also "́Round and Round" by Ratt.

And also to have so much fun

And also, by the way, I'm the cube for the common cold.

And artistic woman.

And ate all those squeezable yogurt wrappers?

And away from Wolf.

And be buried at Fresno Memorial Gardens.

And because a mall psychic told me

And become the most famous person in town,

And Beef wears Husky Bucks.

And before the game even started,

And blood rain down, or whatever.

And by "money," I mean "understanding."

And by doing that, support Dad.

And by the way,

And Cake Lady till morn.

And clear your name.

And Dad just keeps saying,

And dating like you wouldn't believe.

And delivering them in the dark of night.

And Deutsch is German for "German."

And do all our old favorite activities,

And do you know what happens to avocado pits

And doesn't let me visit his mountain?

And don't get distracted by teaching Timothy to fly.

And don't waste yours on someone who can't even return it.

And don't worry about the haters.

And Doris behind the scenes getting it all on tape.

And dress well, we're still not perfect.

And dropped out after a year and a half.

And each other.

And etcetera. Got it.

And even if you did, these are facts about her.

And ever since then, he just wants the whole family

And every time I do, I think,

And everybody else I've ever dated.

And everybody gets one?

And everyone else will judge you.

And everyone lives happily ever after."

And everything was blazin' in the Big Raisin.

And falls in with a bunch of rude puppeteers

And fart up the room again?

And for a long time, he pretended she was dead

And Fresno had everything a hungry,

And gather my thoughts about the evening.

And get your things from the house.

And give me and Dad and Dell some privacy.

And give my bedbug warnings

And give yourself an alibi? You like knockin' over

And go and live a full and productive life without me.

And good morning to my best friend/inspiration

And guard the door. Go get 'em, Dad.

And guess what? I know where we can go for each.

And he doesn't need one to sell blinds.

And he had a shirt on.

And he is at serious risk of dying alone,

And he will make me his deputy!

And he'll go with cousin Becca, and we'll, like, go together.

And he'll say, "Oh, okay. Do you want your whisk back?"

And he'll say, "Okay. Why are you handing me a whisk?"

And he's generally worried about his family drifting apart.

And he's hanging out at our very own Russian restaurant?

And her gorgeous hair extensions!

And her gorgeous hair extensions.

And here you are at a café in Italy!

And his brown‐haired Bigfoot brethren

And his eye will start doing that tight twitchy thing.

And honestly, Beef, if you want to be a good date,

And Honeybee "Spit Like a Man" Shaw.

And Honeybee's family is coming.

And how better to demand them

And how many dates has he been on since he stopped pretending?

And I awoke feeling complete.

And I couldn't get any service on my cell phone.

And I do. Oh, how I do.

And I don't want to get involved.

And I enjoy the "what if,"

And I feel like you knew that and that was a gotcha question.

And I found this fur!

And I guess we all just got a little scared of, well,

And I had.

And I have some... one idea.

And I haven't been able to kiss anyone since.

And I just kept saying, "You go, girl!"

And I know like, 18 guys.

And I learned that the inventor of the curtain rod

And I look up at the sky and soak in

And I love you. And I... Aah!

And I made a portrait

And I might be able to use some help

And I miss you and will you please move back?

And I need my dad on my caboose.

And I never forgot it. Police took the boot

And I picked up a pizza and came right here and fell in a hole.

And I planned a celebration

And I promised to pay a lumberjack

And I saw him a with ChapStick.

And I think I have a plan, but it's something I can't do

And I think you're really great.

And I thought to myself, "Uh huh, game recognize game."

And I thought, "I've always loved cake.

And I tied my rope to the outdoor barbecue,

And I tried to get on board, but now I don't even get

And I want to shoot it on your boat!

And I was floating on a big chip.

And I was sad when we stopped.

And I will always show you the money!

And I'll run ahead and I'll try to, uh,

And I'll say, "Because I'm not baking a cake this year."

And I'll say, "No. You keep the whisk, dear Mayor."

And I'll sell blackout curtains to Draculas

And I'm a little bit drunk and my fiancée is lost.

And I'm allergic to my own farts,

And I'm gonna ask Principal Gibbons to let me put together

And I'm here to reveal to you my very first Feast Cake.

And I'm inviting Jake Gyllenhaal.

And I'm making microwave popcorn for our tour.

And I'm probably going to catch him tonight.

And I'm really, really rooting for you guys to beat us.

And I'm refusing the epidural, because I want to feel

And I'm Shrek's nemesis, the Babadook.

And I'm sorry about the medium popcorn.

And I'm the only one who even cares?

And I've got everyone's good sides.

And if he can't make it,

And if he's not my Shrek, I'll come home,

And if she can't make it,

And if you do need to get out some aggression,

And if you wanted to be involved,

And imaginary drumroll as Tobin Family Film Friday starts

And introduced him to some of the Old Faithfuls?

And is a real person that Dad has not been on any dates

And it feels crazy.

And it goes perfectly.

And it is a long story.

And it is alive inside of me right now through journalism.

And it makes him smell like...

And it rarely works out. Remember rhythmic gymnastics?

And it releases a flood of dangerously delicious

And it was actually better when she left.

And it was there that he met the love of his life, Ruby,

And it'll surely be the first stop

And it's called Inner Yarnings.

And it's fun.

And it's gonna be like... (imitates explosion)

And it's not gonna smell like toffee.

And it's not surprising

And it's the only hobby of mine

And it's... 5:00 a. m.?

And its pollution is bringing out every shade of orange.

And just enjoy curling and each other.

And just took a bath.

And keep him from talking about fish.

And keep them distracted while we do this.

And legally drowned for three minutes.

And let me just grab my famous Fresno 14 layer dip.

And light it like a beautiful Molotov candle

And majored in business and then hated it

And make my first artistic mark on the world,

And make snow demons under the impenetrable night sky,

And maybe watching me get hurt by your mom

And me, I was a lesbian for men.

And Morris, you don't attempt a Manitoba tuck on swingy ice.

And my abs hurt when I sob because of that dumb abpp!

And my coach, Mr. Jardine.

And my entire family.

And my penis did not like it.

And my queen bee to be from Mom.

And newfound positive outlook on life.

And news flash, pinto beans are not a good gift!

And no one knows the beautiful game better than me.

And nobody should be concerned about it.

And not a single soul believed that it was her.

And not both of ours, together,

And not so much for me because I am very confident

And not tell my sister about it"?

And nothing bad ever happens to dads, right?

And now Glynis will demonstrate the peculiar gait

And now here you are doing pretty much

And now I'm going through a hell of a divorce.

And now I'm up here stuck on a log,

And now it's all we've ever wanted.

And now they keep sliding down.

And now they're just...

And now we really upset her?

And now Wolf and Honeybee will exchange their vows...

And now,

And of course she'll go out with him.

And our winner is... Honeybee Shaw!

And outhouse. And tiny stage.

And panning for gold.

And positive reviews before we can ask

And Post its.

And pretend I'm a wonderful lady.

And pretends like it's a little snake.

And put 'em in water, who am I to stop you?

And Richard was in a plane crash, which he survived,

And ride that horse to the barn and meet women

And salsa, mayonnaise, scallops and cashews

And say, "Here's my whisk."

And scare you back into the house.

And scene.

And second, if they were, you wouldn't suck their venom, Judy.

And see how he likes it.

And see if all the booze burns

And see this crazy snowflake.

And see what you guys can do?

And selling those eggs.

And she only talks to me through some bored looking puppet?

And she's already three plane aritas deep.

And show them her grave.

And show them your great grandmother's trophies.

And sleep in till 5:45.

And so bad at staying seated throughout the ride.

And so I'm picking out a gift for him.

And so, brave Thomas headed off into the wilderness.

And someday our kids.

And sometimes I'll use a breath mint instead of deodorant.

And step three: hands.

And stretching that blad.

And suck the venom from their legs

And support that Ham needs.

And take a little bitty storm siesta.

And take half the cheese log.

And talked them into coming back on a sunset sail today.

And terrible. And normal.

And that Dad's the greatest

And that he wanted to commemorate it

And that I sometimes like to smell‐‐

And that is exactly why

And that should be enough to get you out of here

And that somehow, we might eat them again.

And that was always okay with Kyle, until it wasn't.

And that way we won't get separated from each other.

And that's a shadow wedding. Any questions?

And that's how we'll keep it. But under no circumstances

And that's just based on estimates.

And that's just because he's the only game in town.

And that's normal. You don't have to let us go.

And that's perfectly natural.

And that's what I love about her.

And that's when I discovered that someone had kicked over

And that's when I met him.

And that's why everything today has to be perfect.

And that's why I say this with all due respect,

And The Baking Lawyer: "The court, and the cake, will rise."

And the boys who don't get invited stand outside

And the brochure is all around us.

And the caboose.

And the cake is too heavy for the two of us to carry that far!

And the caribou no longer utters its lonely howl?

And the character hasn't left me.

And the deal will be closed before we even get the menus.

And the foundation of our local economy.

And the four of us have to go do something very normal

And the fur I found was just a coat.

And the kind of snow covered holes that Dad might

And the little guy's Moon.

And the most handsome teen in Lone Moose, Crispin

And the newly decorated shadow wedding boat on opposite ends

And the only thing we don't know is who did it or why.

And the other one is very proud of you.

And the party will be based around the movie Shrek,

And the pencils.

And the way you arranged those chairs? Aloha.

And then Oh, ooh, oh, you left.

And then "cake."

And then a bunch of smaller circles

And then a lot of alcohol poured all over the ice.

And then a pinch and I mean just a pinch of honey.

And then after you left, we realized

And then another moose showed up that they realized

And then be like, "Ugh, Vera, who owns a junkyard now?

And then disappointment when she doesn't is normal.

And then from there, who knows what would happen?

And then he crashed his car.

And then he curled each brother to safety.

And then he sings it and then he whispers it.

And then I came out here to find you,

And then I head down to the kitchen

And then I met these talking snowflakes.

And then I put this little tent around you

And then I realized his hair was lodged in my braces.

And then I took a glorious dump.

And then I woke up...

And then I'm gonna follow the rope

And then kind of stick it back in the top of the jug

And then pop his head clean off right in front of you

And then pretend that you like laying on the ground?

And then say "stay in school"?

And then the dentist had to temporarily

And then there she was. Oh, it was like...

And then we just hitchhike to, like...

And then we say, "Yum! This guac is good."

And then we're afraid

And then who would protect our new house?

And then you die. All the other hikers

And then you guys had to make it your idea.

And then you laid face down in the snow.

And then you went out all alone and got lost in the snow.

And then you're just a couple of boobsicles staring at God.

And then, I wait to see who bites.

And there's a drawing of either a middle finger

And there's that lady there, who I've never seen.

And these two never let me forget it.

And they all fell in love.

And they weren't supposed to be on a moose!

And they're doing everything I was supposed to do.

And things aren't good. The Beef Sliders have

And think about how Tusk

And this is gonna sound wild, but...

And this is how I read my book.

And those little yellow dudes, the Minions‐‐

And those stones are having a house party, making a mess,

And time folds in on itself?

And turn it into, like, 300 baseball cards.

And Tusk, well, he's passed out in the Kia,

And two Calvin and Hobbes books in the basement.

And two, she didn't know that Vera

And unmatched in kick ass theme songs.

And venetian blinds to nosy neighbors with binoculars

And very romantic.

And wait for conditions to clear or or Dad to find us.

And watch a real mov... (gasps)

And watches every season of Gilmore Girls on a loop.

And we could stop for a nice lunch in between.

And we do it by not eating people.

And we love you just the way you are, damn it!

And we never talk about it,

And we will take a picture with me, him and the whisk.

And we'll have the Wi Fi back.

And we're about to add a beautiful cup of honey

And we're doing the shadow wedding.

And we're still lost.

And we're walking.

And we've already gone 142 steps.

And we've been looking for investors.

And wedding party played by Judy's improv troupe.

And weighed them separately?"

And what a handsome bank.

And what do you see?!

And what if Ham goes off to culinary school

And what if Judy moves to France

And what if Moon grows up to be a reclusive mountain man

And what looks like waffle maker prints.

And when I say "lodged," I mean

And who better to practice on than your own kids?

And who, in fact, discovered it? And now she's avoiding you?

And why we had to stop curling together.

And will ruin our wedding if she shows

And Wolf just said to stay where you are,

And Wolf missed wood piling day

And Wolf wants to move across town.

And Wolf wins.

And Wolf's about to plummet to his death

And Wolf's favorite person who isn't Dad.

And wow za, look at this turnout!

And yes, I do.

And you always did.

And you and I were a winning...

And you can actually come?

And you can be my new Kooky Kelly.

And you can read two thirds of it.

And you can sleep with Honeybee.

And you cut off Aurora's pigtail,

And you definitely can't snap any curling brooms in half

And you deserve a sophisticated adult dance experience.

And you didn't come to watch that other

And you didn't even ask for them.

And you have to guess what it is?

And you know what I'm just thinking of right now,

And you know what this means? (heavy, excited breathing)

And you never know who might try to steal them.

And you pretend to believe him?

And you probably need to figure out

And you seem like a good guy who does not deserve

And your all girl pan flute group.

And your gym class and your every other class.

And your largest appetizer sampler.

And your mom is our iceberg. And if she tries to ruin

And your name sounds like somebody stepped on a cow.

And, Delmer, that was the perfect array

And, frankly, he's uncouth as hell.

And, guys, I just want to say if you screw this up,

And, Ham, I was gonna save your German chocolate cake

And, Ham, I'll need you to be my anchor.

And, of course, I'll have my volunteers.

And, Russell, we know Fred Savage isn't your first cousin!

And, so, we are gathered here today

And, so, yeah, that's why we planned

And, Tanya, Beef's upset because he lost his son in the snow

And, uh, check out the hip after work crowd?

And, uh, take kind of a deep dive into, uh...

And, well, I know you like it here.

And, well, it's time to pull out the liar extinguisher.

And, yes, the pigtail is in there.

And, you know, I bet if just you and I curled together

And... action.

And... ah, perfect. Ah.

And... I couldn't resist trying to do

And... scene.

And... time.

Another Sprite, just separately.

Another Tobin Family Film Friday?

Anthony and I had such a wonderful time in Italy.

Anthony used to love to decorate our Christmas tree

Any famous quotes from There Will Be Blood.

Any questions? No? Okay, great.

Any type of decision tonight, so let's touch base in a few weeks.

Anyway, he's gonna stay with us for a few days

Anyway, I guess I can't keep following in your footsteps.

Anyways, I'm working on my wedding outfit.

Apparently, he's actually faster running on four legs

Are consistently unreliable.

Are longtime reigning Daver Dash champions.

Are the Curtain King and Queen of Fresno.

Are the exact same species?

Are the kids still into him?

Are these tourists paying us?

Are we clear for strawberries?

Are we making money this time?

Are we supposed to be impressed?

Are well insulated, sustainable and fun.

Are you avoiding me, Kyle?

Are you blind?

Are you ever coming back to me?

Are you familiar with our school's most famous teacher Thomas Wintersbone?

Are you going to Russell's after school?

Are you interested?

Are you kidding? Dad's favorite thing

Are you ready for your big surprise?

Are you serious?

Are you sure your dad's gonna come find us?

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Are you, like, the male Judds?

Aren't we, Dad? Aren't we?

Art isn't about what you see;

Art itself is being threatened.

As "a screaming."

As a flight attendant.

As I discovered earlier when I looked it up.

As if you were surging with power,

As long as your new idea is the old idea

As serious as two people

As Sully from Monsters University.

As the scientists say, bazinga.

As the teens say, "meet people,"

As well as some "merc" from the mercantile stand.

As you all know, it's your sister Judy's sweet 16 today,

As you may have just witnessed,

As you've described him to me.

At Alaska's majesty while whispering "Hot dog."

At Almond Grove High's production of Grease.

At every step along the way!

At many of our mid range restaurants and hotels,

At night sounds so romantic.

At school from when we did M. Butterfly. Wolf?

At the Coffee Beanery in Vancouver

At the cotillion all over again.

At the end of a hard day,

At the Meet and Meat singles mixer this weekend.

At the Point & Shoot Photo Studio,

At the risk of sounding incredibly arrogant,

At the Russian Bar that'd be perfect

At the Russian restaurant yesterday.

At the shadow wedding and falling under her spell.

At this time of year, or in Lone Moose, period.

At this time of year.

Attached to a belt, and all I crave

Avocados are going to be tough to find in Lone Moose

Avocados are not gonna be easy to find in Lone Moose

Avocados don't have faces.

Aw, shoot. It's expired.

Aw, shucks. Well, what about a mural

Aw, well, darn it, that just fell down on its own.

Away from me, but everything is different now.

Aww...

Ay, chihuahua.

Aye, aye, Captain Bee. Moon?

Baby, that's the third guacamole dream this week.

Back to the house... Aah!

Background character after Irish Mommy.

Bad news for Tulsa.

Balls to the walls bonkers over here?

Bar closing. Your card declined.

Barely make it to my anniversary party

Basically, what I'm trying to say is trust your gut

Bavarian Bit Bite?

Be confident.

Be our man on the outside.

Because all of our careful wedding planning is at risk.

Because being brothers doesn't mean we're the same person.

Because Bigfoot isn't real and only little kids think he is.

Because Father lost everything at the greyhound races,

Because he thinks he's the only game in town,

Because he'll be trotting into dance land with moi,

Because I am definitely about to fart

Because I am forced to sit upon a sanitary napkin

Because I could only remember one word in my fugue state:

Because I couldn't be my own fabulous self.

Because I don't want Dad to hear.

Because I hate it when you guys all fight with each other,

Because I have so many new interests.

Because I tied my rope to Moon.

Because I was afraid that your hair would end up in my mouth.

Because I'll be having lunch with, um, someone from history,

Because I'm upset about other stuff!

Because if Dad finds out,

Because it brought me to you, and now we both found

Because it sounded for a second

Because it was cute but then turned out to be

Because it's high time we Tobins dipped

Because Jack voluntarily drowned near a door.

Because life moves pretty fast.

Because of all the wood on me.

Because of my unsightly bangs,

Because she doesn't want to be here.

Because she hates it, and I just didn't ask

Because she wasn't your Fiona. I am.

Because the bed is a boat.

Because they had to, quote, "get their marriage license."

Because they wouldn't give her a trophy?

Because this is an actual bag of beans.

Because we're basically a band of no good grifters

Because you know who can enjoy this?

Because you think it'll make you happy.

Because you're pretty fun to hang out with.

Because you're under the dirty thumb of Sandy Flarts.

Because, as the saying goes,

Because, otherwise, how could I drive you home from there?

Because, sure, she's messed up,

Because... (imitates fanfare)

Because... I'm normal.

Becca, say hello to your cousins.

Beef Sliders, you all know me: Delmer, you're my godfather.

Beef, "circle back" is good. "Touch base" is very bad.

Beef, have you tried talking to your son about it?

Beef, I I'm not sure this is the best story.

Beef, let's go. I'm late.

Beef, this is my new wife Tanya.

BEEF: ♪ It gave us time to talk ♪

BEEF: ♪ It was fun to watch you grow ♪

BEEF: ♪ Our time, it brought me joy ♪

BEEF: ♪ That cafe that we ate in ♪

BEEF: ♪ We almost hit a buck ♪

BEEF: Alaska aloha to you,

BEEF: All right, Tobins,

BEEF: Eventually, though, they realized

BEEF: In honor of the six month anniversary

BEEF: Oh, he's gorgeous.

BEEF: Oh, look at these little butterballs.

BEEF: Oh, that's not Kathleen.

BEEF: Son, that cake looks

BEEF: These underprepared vacationers turned

BEEF: What an excellent view.

Beef...

Bees are actually allergic to me.

BEFF: Do you trust me, Prentis?

Before heading out to work on the boat.

Before telling us where to put 'em

Being filled with dread that Kathleen will appear