Gentlemen Broncos Edit

A 50 acre horse ranch.

A body of work you now know as The Cyborg Harpies.

A fetus is found on a moon base.

A hard rain's gonna fall.

A man who has created such realistic characters, l call them friends.

A man whose canon of work has pushed the envelope of science and reason.

A place where even the bravest of travelers

A popcorn car.

A prize winning stallion.

A prototype of some mamocans, which shot actual lasers.

A troll wouldn't come up with a name like Teacup, a little girl would.

Action.

Ain't gonna need no husband, won't need no wife

Ain't gonna need no husband, won't need no wife

Ain't gonna need no husband, won't need no wife

Ain't gonna need to teII the truth, tell no lies

Ain't gonna need your teeth, won't need your eyes

Ain't gonna need your teeth, won't need your eyes

All day long l think of things

All l see is a bunch of organic waste.

All my cash is still in euros and l haven't had time to change it over yet.

All right, let's give it a little test.

All right.

All you did was change the character names and turn Bronco into a tranny.

Alpha, you love to write fantasy fiction,

Also, could you play a role in the movie that we're shooting right now?

Amen.

And a trip to Space Camp.

And action.

And actually exploded and maimed a dolly grip.

And also, since your mom works for LeVonne's,

And beta, the character names in your stories are suffering.

And congratulations, Benjamin. This is a very big deal.

And finally we have a youngling

And gave me so many diseases.

And guess what?

And he ain't put back nothing, whoa oh

And he wants to see my entire line.

And held aloft a futuristic cylinder.

And his gonads are his seed,

And if he's part of a traveling clan,

And if l claim to be a wise man

And if l don't believe it, the reader doesn't believe it.

And it depicts a fleet of harpies synchronizing their mammary cannons

And it is definitely worth at least a couple hundred bucks.

And it. . . lt appears that there's one or two things missing.

And it's gotta be Dusty. He's our good luck charm.

And it's that easy.

And l came up with a bunch of new designs.

And l had a scientist friend of mine from MlT build

And l'd replace it with an "L." Bronlonius.

And l'll be there in a second.

And l'll have my people restore it with scrap linens.

And l'm not saying that just 'cause l'm your Guardian Angel.

And l'm worried they're gonna ruin it.

And let somebody else completely change the vision of your work.

And one overheated and began to malfunction,

And seated next to me is Mr. Dusty Crissop. He's the leading man.

And that way, if we die, future generations will learn from us.

And that's $1 00 we don't have this month.

And the next he puts on a bald head and he's acting.

And the winner will receive a 1 ,000 copy release of their work

And then this trailer will be done.

And there we go, l think. ls that good?

And this commemorative bean pillow,

And this guy said you stole the whole deal from some book.

And this one, it's breakfast inspired.

And to my guests, break a leg.

And what's it about?

And who can l make this out to?

And who knows? Perhaps these producers may create

And you're completely infused with another energy,

And. . .

And. . .

Are buried in the past forever

Are so much better than the original.

Are there any questions?

Are these the nighties?

Are they tree dwellers, bridge dwellers, subterranean?

Are you all right, Vanaya?

Are you all right? You're not wounded, are you?

Are you excited? Yeah.

Are you serious?

Are you serious?

Are you serious? He wants to make it into a movie?

Are you sure, Merve?

Are you telling me what trolls are named after?

As a reward for his efforts,

As we commemorate his contribution to science and the arts.

At selected bookstores nationwide.

Awesome.

Basically, it's a story about two lonely souls

Be safe.

Beauty.

Because all of our dreams are reachable, Benjy, even yours.

Because it all boils down to species.

Because l really think Lonnie should read it.

Before we commence the activities,

Benjamin is from Saltair, and he likes to write sci fi stories.

Benjamin, get back in the car!

Benjamin, l'd like you to meet Tabatha Jenkins.

Benjamin, Lonnie wants to pay you for Yeast Lords.

Benjamin, look,

Benjamin, no! Benjamin, no!

Benjamin, stop, get back in the car.

Benjamin, this is Lonnie Donaho.

Benjamin, wait, we can get through this.

Benjamin, you are so talented.

Benjamin?

Benjamin.

Benjamin.

Benjamin.

BENJAMlN: Bronco and Vanaya began their assault on the yeast factory,

BENJAMlN: Bronco cried out in pain as he sat on the shore of Goose Lake,

BENJAMlN: The Nad Lab was a cold, white room.

BENJAMlN: You think you can harass my mom, you fat sack of crap?

Benjy, don't ruin it for me.

Benjy, l'm so glad you signed up for this.

Blowing with the wind of change

Bridgette? Some kind of troupe of pre teen amateur circus freaks

Broncaho.

Broncanuss.

Bronco, the last of the Yeast Lords,

Bronco!

Bronco.

Bronco.

Bronco. Are you all right?

Brussels.

BRUTUS: What's he doing now?

Brutus.

But Daysius has surely destroyed him by now.

But Daysius has surely destroyed him by now.

But don't worry, need thou not be afraid,

But don't you have another copy?

But he was already married to her sister.

But he's very handy with powders and gizmos and such.

But l couldn't do it.

But l flew too high

But l hear the voices say

But l still like the name Teacup better.

But l think it's gonna sell really well.

But l was hoping it could appeal to a younger market.

But nothing seems to satisfy

But some are just trailers.

But someday your junk will be seen by all, and it will be awesome.

But the yeast patty Bronco had previously eaten started to make him feel like crap.

But those who can't will just eat the food they brought from home.

But through the eternal night

But to be honest, his story had some major issues.

But we're investigating ways to strengthen the military.

But what many people fail to recognize

But what she didn't have was

But while you were at Cletus Fest, l got you some new shoes.

But you can call me Todd, or some people just like to call me Keefe.

But, please, show leniency. Always leniency.

By playing her an original piece of music on his harpy chord.

Can l borrow some money to buy some tampons?

Can l look at that salmon gown?

Can we bring old big sis along?

Can we crush them in the press?

Can you explain what that music was supposed to sound like?

Can you hold on for just a second?

Carry on my wayward son

Carry on my wayward son

Carry on my wayward son

Centaur lover

Certainly.

Chevalier.

Chevalier.

Chevalier.

Chevalier. He's talking about Ronald Chevalier.

CHEVALlER: (SlNGlNG) Centaur lover

CHEVALlER: Brutus and Venonka surveyed the yeast factory,

CHEVALlER: Brutus stood at the edge of the pond

CHEVALlER: Groggily, Brutus regained consciousness.

CHEVALlER: You're welcome. Thank you.

Come back in a year from now, and we'll see if it clears.

Come closer.

Come down here and fight me!

Come here, l want you to meet someone.

Come on in. The water's great.

Come on, baby, show me what that loaded gun is for...

Come on, Daysius.

Come on, feel how heavy these are.

Come on. Come on, honey, l need your help.

Come with me to my underground facilities.

Come, let's bed down for the eve.

Cool. Where did you go?

CUSTOMER: Well, how much is it?

Cut!

Cut!

Cyclops there.

Cyclops there.

Cyclops there. Cyclops there.

Dang. That's a lot.

Darn you, flippin' Daysius.

Daysius is gonna build himself an army using my seed.

Daysius. l should've known it was you.

Did you catch any neat rocks?

Did you ever think

Did you hear what he did to my voice? l sound like a leprechaun.

Distant memories

Do you mind if l run a few of them by you?

Do you produce only Tabatha's work?

Do you think they will remember us for our writing?

Do you think you could bring some nightgowns?

Does he shape shift into equine form ever?

Don't worry about it.

Don't worry about that, l'm fine.

Don't you cry no more

Don't you cry no more

Don't you cry no more No!

Down to Gorky Park

Dr. Ronald Chevalier.

Dude, it's the circle of life. Go for it.

Dusty Crissop, the leading man, a movie star.

DUSTY: lt's like working with an extension of myself.

DUSTY: No.

Dusty?

Easy, easy.

English US PSDH

Especially to Europe, l think. . .

Ever since the epidemic.

Everything you think, do and say

Except on formal occasions.

Excuse me for a moment.

Excuse me?

Excuse me.

Explore its many kingdoms and learn its darkest secrets.

Finished with my woman 'cause she couldn't help me with my mind

For the best work submitted at this festival.

For the first time ever, it is my privilege to announce

For the LeVonne's gowns this morning,

For the money, for the riches of the earth.

For the vital, life giving colostrum.

For we can turn a humdrum, forgettable name like Nebuchadnezzar

For what he never knew

For what he never knew

Forgive me.

Friends. Friends.

From the bottom of a long glass tube, whoa oh

From the bottom of a long glass tube, whoa oh

From the bottom of a long glass tube, whoa oh

Get away from me with that. You hear me?

Get her.

Give me an example.

God is gonna shake his mighty head

Good morning, homeschoolers.

Good morning. Welcome to The Rod Decker Show.

Good night, Benjamin. l really need to think about this one.

Goodbye.

Gotta cut bait on this deal.

Great question. Thank you for firing it at me.

Greetings and salutations.

GUARD: Open the gate.

Guess it's time for the Judgment Day

Ha ha, whoopee!

Happy birthday.

Have made an adaptation of Brutus and Balzaak

Haven't you read the prophecies?

He can build anything.

He doesn't speak.

He has connections in the audiovisual industry.

He has his own video production company, Donaho Studios.

He is a man who has repeatedly probed our imaginations for decades.

He kind of died when l was young.

He might know someone that could help get you published.

He must have found something.

He said if l slept with him,

He wanted me to bed down with him.

He was born with flesh pockets.

He was real brave. He was a game warden, an explorer.

He what?

He'll do anything for you.

He'll either say, "l'm pleased where man has been"

He's in town.

He's kind of lame.

He's my Angel.

He's not gonna like my story, the names are all wrong.

He's taken everything this old Earth can give

He's the chosen one.

Headphone, please.

Hello?

Hello.

Hello. Hi.

Here in the Great Basin valley,

Here is a detail of the ruptured moon crust.

Here, she uses her knowledge of lasers to rupture the crust of a distant moon.

Here, you try it.

Hey, Benjamin.

Hey, Benjamin. l'm so glad you came. How are you?

Hey, Benjy.

Hey, can we come sit by you?

Hey, Don Carlos! How about you come down here and fight me like a man !

Hey, Logan, want to go for a ride?

Hey, Lonnie, bring our stuff. Let's sit over here.

Hey, Lonnie, can you squirt me some of that lotion we just bought?

Hey, Lonnie, what are my lines?

Hey, Lonnie? Tell him how much you're willing to pay.

Hey, Lonnie. This is my mom, Judith.

Hey!

Hey. l didn't see you there.

Hey. l don't know if you remember me or anything.

Hey. l don't think you're allowed to be here. Mr. Keefe is right next door.

Hey. What are you guys doing here?

Hey. You Benjamin?

Hi, l'm with the Village Gazette. Nice to meet you.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi. Hi.

Hi. l just need to cash this.

Hi. l like your matching hippie clothes.

Hi. Nice to meet you.

Hi. Welcome to LeVonne's.

His clansfellow could call him Bronlo for short,

His name is Kanaya.

Hmm.

Honey, are you looking for some trouble tonight?

Honey, but you met your match tonight

Horse movies, romance, soaps, fantasies. . .

How about some good news?

How about you, Duster?

How do l look?

How long you been doing that?

How many films have you made?

How was the workshop?

I can, however, reveal the lyrics to that tune,

I mean, it"s a little jarring in places,

Including myself,

Into something magical like this. . .

Is that l created over 49 different pieces of cover art for that trilogy.

It's not a bad idea to get in touch with your audience once in a while.

Join me now in a moment of silence

JUDlTH: Guess this is it.

JUDlTH: Hey, Benjamin, come here. l want you to meet someone.

JUDlTH: Hi, guys.

JUDlTH: l know you like wearing your dad's old clothes,

Just a small town dude with a big city attitude

Just like Jesse James

Just like Jesse James

Just like Jesse James

Just like when we were children.

Just pop open the trunk and get out of here.

Just read it.

Just to get a glimpse beyond this illusion

Kanaya and l just escaped from the yeast factory there.

Keefe is so dang awesome.

Keefe, can you tell me how much money he's gonna need for two days?

KEEFE: Right.

Kenonka. Kenonka.

Known as "The Power of the Suffix."

Kristie.

Krolaxx, come on. Come on, Krolaxx.

L am your soldier.

L brought you some presents.

L brought your wrap gift.

L call it Migration,

L can do better.

L can feel it everywhere

L can hear them say

L can show you.

L can smell a cache of yeast cakes 40 mile off.

L can't let that happen. His power's become unruly.

L can't move. My buttocks is completely numb.

L can't.

L can't.

L don't believe that.

L don't believe this.

L don't care if you have a 50 acre ranch or a prize winning stallion.

L don't even think we were supposed to take the tags off.

L don't feel very good.

L don't know how l'm gonna give you a birthday.

L don't know how this all happened. l just. . .

L don't know of another director who can call "action" one minute,

L don't know what you're talking about.

L don't know where this came from, but it's fantastic.

L don't know. Chevalier seems kind of full of himself.

L don't know. l usually don't let people read my stuff.

L don't like it. l would go with Trojainous every time.

L don't think that's a good idea.

L feel like things are changing for us, don't you?

L follow the Moskva

L give you one of the greatest

L got really inspired about my collection,

L hate those.

L hate those.

L have just given birth to a litter of troll cubs.

L haven't even finished reading it,

L hear the voices when l'm dreaming

L heated up the hot water bottle so you can sit on it while we drive.

L hit that guy in the face.

L just pray that he likes my collection.

L just. . . You know, l did the inventory

L know a lot of your books have been made into TV movies,

L know it didn't win or anything,

L know who you are.

L know you're upset, but we plan to give it back.

L know, but if there's one thing l can't stand, it's plagiarism.

L know. May the gods bless you.

L like it.

L liked it 'cause l thought it had a wholesome ring,

L love my wife. We have a great physical relationship.

L love you forever and ever.

L love you.

L made us a time capsule.

L mean, isn't that why we do what we do, dagnammit?

L mean, the idea of somebody bastardizing my work really freaks me out.

L mean, this could be my big ticket.

L mean, this will be one of the few movies out there

L put a butt load of keepsakes in it.

L recently sold a story that l wrote to some independent filmmakers,

L remember early on in my career working on the first Harpy mini series.

L see. Have they paid you yet?

L see. So Bronco is kind of like your dad,

L sent him my latest installments via e mail.

L set a course for winds of fortune

L submitted this story called Yeast Lords.

L tell you to enjoy life l wish l could but it's too late

L think that's what they say in show business.

L think this is gonna be a really neat opportunity for you.

L think you're really gonna enjoy the Cletus Festival this year.

L thought maybe you can give me your feedback.

L thought maybe you two could go out in the back and get to know each other

L thought someday you could show it to your kids.

L thought they were skipper shoes.

L thought trolls were supposed to be named after resources, like trees.

L thought we could grab a couple of sudokus and snuggle up somewhere.

L thought you didn't like it. Last night you seemed offended.

L thought you said he was good at making bombs and robots and stuff.

L told the producers l wanted everything to be absolutely real.

L tried them on during a lunch break in front of the crew,

L truly believe that.

L want to get published for real.

L want you to meet Dusty, your new Guardian Angel.

L wanted to write a story for my dad.

L was actually in your workshop at Cletus Fest.

L was but a child then, maybe you don't remember.

L was just wondering maybe if you had read it,

L was soaring ever higher

L was thinking it could be just the two of us.

L was wondering if you would sign this for me.

L wish l could've been there for ye.

L would just love to step inside your brain for a day and see what it's like.

L would like to introduce you to a dear disciple of mine.

L write French mysteries, you know.

L'd like to introduce you to a very special person.

L'll talk to you later.

L'm assuming that most of you are here for two main reasons.

L'm calling you on behalf of Donaho Studios.

L'm completely distressed. l can't even concentrate on my audio book narration.

L'm dead serious.

L'm fine.

L'm gonna make it out of some beach towels with some burlap fringe.

L'm gonna shoot you down, Jesse James

L'm good.

L'm kind of wondering if man is gonna be alive

L'm Mr. Keefe, the homeschool co op advisor this year,

L'm not seeing results.

L'm not thinking, "Hmm, Teacup," am l?

L'm so nervous.

L'm sorry, Vanaya, l have to do this alone.

L'm sorry.

L'm sorry. l'm sorry. l can't do this. This movie's gonna suck.

L've already approved it for print.

L've been registering all your stories

L've changed the name of my collection to Decent Beginnings.

L've heard that one before.

L've just completed the cover art for Star Bracelets.

L've let my mom read a few, but they've just made her cry.

L've only just realized that what we shared together onscreen

Land your stag !

Lay spread eagle, strapped to a medical pod.

Lay your weary head to rest

Lay your weary head to rest

Lay your weary head to rest

Let us come with you.

Let's blow on it.

Let's go someplace where we can relax and be alone.

Lf female, Trojana.

Lf God's a coming He ought to make it by then

Lf man is still alive

Lf man is still alive

Lf man is still alive

Lf woman can survive

Lf woman can survive they may find

Lf you don't believe me, smell my breath.

Lf you want to see Yeast Lords,

Listen, Merve, did you have a chance

Listening to the wind of change

Ln addition, l will personally create an original piece of cover art

Ln the second book of the Cyborg Harpies trilogy,

Ln the wind of change

Ln the wind of change

Ln the year 2525

Ln the year 2525

Ln the year 2525

Ln the year 3535

Ln the year 4545

Ln the year 4545

Ln the year 5555

Ln the year 5555

Ln the year 6565

Ln the year 6565

Ln the year 6565

Ln the year 751 0

Ln the year 851 0

Ln the year 9595

Ln this first piece, we see an early rendering of a harpy named Linda.

Ln troll colonies, well, that's a different matter.

Lnstantly, Brutus knew that one of his reproductive bags had been stolen.

Lnvestors from all over the world have tried everything they can

Logan, the stable boy.

Lonnie has come into some serious cash lately.

Lonnie is the best director l've ever worked with, by far.

Lonnie thinks he wants to produce Yeast Lords.

Lonnie! You can't do that. That's an $80 Don Carlos.

Lonnie.

Lonnie's a butthole.

Lonnie's stepsister runs the Navajo Taco stand.

LONNlE: 500, cash.

LONNlE: Daisy had everything.

LONNlE: Okay.

LONNlE: One of the laser hit my boobs.

Look at this.

Look, it was Lonnie's idea, not mine.

Look.

Look. lt's Dusty.

Looking for an Achilles' heel.

Love your dress.

Loved Brutus and Balzaak so much

Ls everybody excited for Cletus Fest or what?

Ls in the pill you took today

Ls this your pudding?

Lsn't that your hero?

Lt is l.

Lt is such an honor to be in the midst of so many juvescent ripe minds.

Lt is?

Lt must have been one of the other judges.

Lt surely means that l don't know

Lt was very sad.

Lt will be judged by a panel of industry professionals,

Lt's a friendship stone.

Lt's a romantic story l wrote. You would be perfect.

Lt's been an amazing experience.

Lt's being held in a mountain fortress just north of here.

Lt's called Simply Cinnamon.

Lt's different. lt's totally different.

Lt's gonna be our next major motion picture.

Lt's just a fungus beef sharing a few yeast like properties.

Lt's just not believable.

Lt's not a question of liking it better, it's just l'm, as an author,

Lt's not a. . .

Lt's not concentrate, but it's pretty darn good.

Lt's not true.

Lt's pretty good yeast.

Lt's rat poison and some of my poo.

Lt's the best writers' camp in the state.

Mainly the last six months. l write about a stable hand named Pierre.

MALE ANNOUNCER ON TV: Broadcasting live from Saltair Studios

Man has cried a billion tears

MAN: Get lost.

MAN: Mr. Donaho?

Masquerading as a man with a reason

May the glistening chrome of the Borg Queen shed her light upon us all.

Maybe after Don Carlos, we could drop by the book signing.

Maybe he'll look around himself and say

Maybe it's only yesterday

Maybe l have some paper towel.

Merve, Merve, wait.

Merve, never make me do another one of these things again.

MERVE: Ronald, how"s the conference going? Any contenders?

Mine just wants to eat.

Miss Tabatha Jenkins is the producer.

Mmm hmm.

Mmm.

Mmm. Eighty three.

Mmm. You like?

Mom, l am not selling two in a sack.

Mom, l need you to pop open the trunk and run away from the car.

Mom, you need to calm down and stop watching yourself cry.

Mom.

Mom. What happened?

Mom. What?

Money.

Moon buggies.

Moon Fetus.

Most people just get sicked out and stop reading.

Mr. Lonnie Donaho is the director ofYeast Lords.

My brother and l have been forced to work in the yeast factories

My brother. He sacrificed himself, and for nothing.

My charade is the event of the season

My family is dead.

My gelée insert.

My gosh.

My mind is a landscape of mystery, of thrills.

My name is Dennis. l'm one of his many clones.

Names in this vein.

Nebuchadnezzar.

Nebucoronius.

Next question.

Nice to see you, Benjy boy.

Nice.

No special effects. l didn't believe in them and l still don't.

No way.

No way. She bought the story from a boy named Benjy Purvis.

No, Benjamin, wait, l'm sorry.

No, but for the wealth we have accumulated.

No, but l can't.

No, he's just a man.

No, Kanaya, no!

No, l don't think l read that one.

No, no, no, I want you to start doing preliminary sketches

No, thank you.

No! Run, Kanaya, run !

No.

No.

No. l do all kind of movies.

No. l don't know. Maybe.

No. l. . . l actually thought it was kind of amazing.

No. None of that crap. lt's just some mild swearing and sci fi violence.

Nobody's gonna look at you

Nobody's gonna look at you

Not bad.

Not quite.

Now it's been 1 0,000 years

Now man's reign is through

Now man's reign is through

Now what l did was l extended the hemline down like that,

Now, my first one is called Front Pew.

Of Brutus and his dog, Balzaak.

Of course. Yes, you look vaguely familiar.

Oh, Benjamin. There you are.

Oh, boy.

Oh, gosh, l'm so sorry.

Oh, honey, don't cry. l know l. . .

Oh, honey.

Oh, l don't think so.

Oh, l'm not the real Lord Daysius.

Oh, mother. A battle stag.

Oh, my goodness.

Oh, my gosh, is that the new Chevalier book?

Oh, my gosh.

Oh, my gosh. Benjamin.

Oh, my holy crap.

Oh, my word.

Oh, my. . . My gems!

Oh, okay.

Oh, shoot.

Oh, thank you.

Oh, that's right

Oh, well, you're nervous about the film, aren't you?

Oh, yeah.

Oh.

Okay, great. So, we'll see you soon.

Okay, that sounds... That sounds interesting. Yeast Lords.

Okay, we can go.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

On a glory night

On a glory night

On a stormy sea of moving emotion

Once l rose above the noise and confusion

One of my trolls is named Teacup.

Only $5, clearance sale at Haymart.

Or tear it down and start again, whoa oh

Our fathers fought valiantly and were victorious in the Battle of Shiroh.

Over here.

Ow.

People hated your movie.

People think l'm insane because l am frowning all the time

Picturing myself as a troll mother.

Please, someone seize him.

Premiere is tonight at the Saltair Cinema.

Prism Publishing has decided to honor him

Prism Publishing will be hosting a contest

Program.

Put the pillow down, l beg of you.

Read this.

Really?

Really?

Really? Are there romantic sequences?

Really? l think he's gorgeous.

Really? You like it?

Relax, Benjamin, l just want to get to know you better.

Relax, Bronco. This will ease the pain.

Release me!

Remember who you are and what you stand for.

Ronald Chevalier had his first trilogy published when he was 1 5.

Ronald, as your publisher,

Ronald, it"s Merve.

Ronald, l'll cut to the chase. lt's horrible.

Run away!

Say what?

Science fiction authors of our time,

Seize him.

Serving your community for over a decade.

Shall we take our seats?

She spent all last year as a foreign exchange student out in Europe.

She's new to the co op as well. Kind of.

Shh !

Shoot them all down with the flash of your pearly smile

Show me your bag of secrets.

Shut up. l don't know what he's talking about.

Sick. ls it lethal?

Since l've been away, he's been shooting my work on weekends.

So are you, Mom.

So come on, baby Come on, baby

So don't forget to do a nice standing ovation.

So how do l avoid situations like that?

So it brings the attention back up to the eyes.

So l signed you up for the Guardian Angel program at church.

So l'm just wondering how you've been able to let go

So very far away

So, do we have a deal or what?

So, l found it really, really inspiring.

So, l noticed you left Cletus early.

So, when are you gonna let me read one of your stories?

Some machine's doing that for you

Some machine's doing that for you

Some of them walked out.

Some of you can afford to eat there,

Some stitches obviously sewn by a medical droid.

Someone had stolen his yeast, and he had gone totally ape sh...

Something even better than your original version.

Sorry, Bronco. We had to borrow one of your gonads.

Sorry, they didn't have any, so l just bought some treats for me and Lonnie.

Strutting into town like you're slinging a gun

Surveillance does.

Tabatha, me and my mom are gonna be out, like, 1 00 bucks now.

TABATHA: May l please speak to Mr. Benjamin Purvis?

TABATHA: My horse's semen is worth $1 0 million.

TABATHA: Oh, my gosh, Lonnie, l think all the changes you made to the script

TABATHA: Okay, guys, we've just got two more scenes,

TABATHA: Whether you like it or not, when you get overseas,

TABATHA: Yeah !

Tabatha?

Take him away.

Take it from someone who lives there, you might not be able to handle it.

Take me there.

Take me to the magic of the moment

Take me to the magic of the moment

Take me to your yeast factory.

Tastes like homemade licorice.

Thank you very much.

Thank you, and thank you for coming. Thank you.

Thank you, Merve.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you. So good to see you, Cletus.

Thanks for being here. Good luck to you.

Thanks, Rod.

Thanks, Tabatha.

Thanks.

Thanks. l owe you big time.

That find love during a time of war and disease.

That he turned it into a gripping screen adaptation called Yeastie Boys.

That is actually way better than the book.

That l could have my nightgowns in every Penney's across America.

That was my backup nad.

That we could be so close, like brothers?

That'd be awesome.

That's all right.

That's amazing.

That's fine. Yeah, l could do that.

That's just an old pudding.

That's the premise.

That's why if somebody messes with one of your stories again,

That's why they're so precious.

The fungus beef, it's poisoned your spine juice.

The future's in the air

The notes of which are too numerous for the human ear to decipher.

The sooner we finish it, the sooner that we can start yours.

The twinkling of starlight

The world is closing in

Then l punched Lonnie in the neck.

There are important press people here,

There was a numb pain below,

There was none.

There'll be peace when you are done

There'll be peace when you are done

There'll be peace when you are done

These are girls' shoes, Mom.

These guys are prolific. This is your 84th production, Mr. Donaho?

These kids are a joke.

They got my reproductives, Vanaya.

They make a really good taco.

They may find...

They're covered in placentae, pawing at my many teats

This check is post dated for next year.

This is a piece that came to me in a dream when l was 1 1 .

This is a terrible place.

This is a very practical design from LeVonne's new Sunset Plains edition.

This is amazing.

This is pretty good.

This is ridiculous. That's the most well guarded yeast factory l've ever seen.

This is so neat.

This isn't bad.

This jacket,

This one is called Righteous Dew.

This one's called Reachable Dream,

This treasure right here is on sale today for $79.95.

This young man standing beside me

Though my eyes could see l still was a blind man

Though my mind could think l still was a madman

Till l'm flat on the floor

Till my heart is crying lndian and l'm begging for more

To accompany the winning story.

To any one of the lower 48 states,

To create laser rain.

To get their hands on it.

To just about anything, and it becomes magical.

To keep you alive, we shared suckle at my mother's breast.

To look at the Sandcastle Diaries yet?

Together, we can destroy Lord Daysius once and for all.

Tonight you're gonna go down in flames

Tonight you're gonna go down in flames

Tossed about, l'm like a ship on the ocean

Tribonius seduces the Borg Queen

Trojainous.

Trojainous. Troka Kahn. Trody.

Trying to penetrate the secrets of the human mind.

Trying to sew his junk back on.

Turrets.

Two for one Country Balls.

Uh. . . l'd say more like 40, maybe?

Unless you can give us something worth taking to print,

Vanaya?

VENONKA: l don't know.

Very original.

Wait a sec.

Walking down the street

War and disease.

Was it a fancy pudding?

Was very real to me.

Watch this.

We are yeastless.

We bring you The Rod Decker Show,

We can add "onius," "ainous," or "anous"

We can send it floating downstream,

We can't afford that.

We can't publish it. lt won't sell.

We gotta do a few loads.

We have some filmmakers here today.

We know where Daysius is hiding your yeast, Bronco.

We must get you out of here.

We must stop him, Bronco.

We must stop that gunfire before it kills Lord Bronco.

We only took one.

We shall begin a new yeast colony,

We will be stopping for lunch at the Kozy Cafe in Echo.

We'd like for you to come down to Donaho Studios to discuss.

We'll be done with it very soon.

We're all very sorry. Lord Daysius sends his regards.

We're going to begin with a little game which will demonstrate a theory of mine

We're just gonna have to let you go.

We're out of time.

Well, all right

Well, cash that check immediately. Enjoy your money.

Well, find something, Kanaya, anything.

Well, have you tried posting any of your stories online?

Well, it was so nice to see you, Benjamin. Bye.

Well, it's not a clean yeast.

Well, l can give it to you later.

Well, l noticed you didn't have any friends,

Well, l thought your story was really good.

Well, let me read you a passage from what l'm reading right now.

Well, let's get out of here, then.

Well, not that, you idiot.

Well, that's a rip off.

Well, that's my dream, but there's only one problem.

Well, then, l would. . . l would lose the "C" immediately,

Well, we better hit the road. Got a big day tomorrow.

Well, we got ours at the end of camp. Maybe they'll mail yours.

Well, you know, like all great writers,

Well, you'll never get anywhere by just letting your mom read your work.

What about names found in troll colonies?

What are you and l gonna wear to the premiere?

What are you doing here?

What are you doing? We're going to be late.

What did he find, the genius?

What do you mean?

What do you want?

What does that mean?

What happened?

What inspired it? Some weird surgery you had?

What is he, a centaur?

What is that?

What l meant to say was he likes collecting things.

What the crap?

What was it like working with Mr. Donaho?

What y'all. . . What y'all want from me?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What?

What? Yeah, sure.

What's all this crap?

What's this?

What's wrong? These guys owe you some money?

When do we get our manuscripts back?

When l was your age, l had just completed my first trilogy,

When the future generations will look back,

When your father died at the hands of Daysius,

Where the children of tomorrow dream away

Where the children of tomorrow dream away

Whether you open yourself up to it or not.

Which means the gonads are you.

Which until now have been unpublished.

While l grill up some cod.

Who's that guy?

Who's that?

Why do you think l wear this bracelet?

Why don't you go into my bedroom and undress to your comfort level,

Why not?

Will you give me a hand massage?

Wish me luck.

With an all expenses paid trip

With my face, running around, making dang fools of themselves?

With the Writers' League since you were seven.

Without a doubt, the best line I"ve ever written is this,

Without further ado,

Without my permission.

Working at the yeast facility has made my breasts so big

Would be shaken by its geysers of original thought.

Wow!

Yeah, he seems pretty cool.

Yeah, l can do that.

Yeah, l had to come back and help my mom with the trade show.

Yeah, l kind of figured that.

Yeah, right.

Yeah, totally. l'd be honored. What's it about?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. But everybody can do that, you know.

Yeah. lt was fun.

Yeah. They gave me a check.

Yeah. We have to be really careful with them, though.

Yeast Lords is amazing,

Yes, but first we must rest our bodies.

Yes, l don't know what we can do. Can we sue them?

Yes, the young man right over here.

Yes?

Yes?

Yes?

Yes?

Yes.

Yes. l believe you're referring to a piece entitled Gorgana's Lullaby,

Yes. Yes, l'll get right on it.

You and Kanaya would just be dead weight, big time.

You blow first.

You can read this. lt's called Yeast Lords.

You do realize l am the author of Troll, Ho.

You got it.

You got to promise me you're gonna let me make you something.

You gotta take them out.

You guys are so lucky you get to be roommates.

You have a brother? Yes.

You know how weird that'd be, a bunch of gorgeous yeast lords

You know, Don Carlos owns the biggest nightgown company in the state,

You know, in the meantime, l might have you try to sell some of my Country Balls.

You know, maybe we could have, like, a. . . A two for one deal.

You look fine.

You release me, my cat's hungry.

You stole my story.

You tell Lord Daysius to eat the corn out of my crap.

You think 4 bucks would be enough?

You think you'll knock me off my feet

You think you're so bad, drive the women folk wild

You took my nads, Dennis.

You took my nads.

You won't do it like that, youngling. You must use friendship.

You won't find a thing to chew

You won't find a thing to chew

You. Give me the name of one of the protagonists in your fantasies.

You. Give me the name of one of your central protags.

You'll pick your son, pick your daughter, too

You'll pick your son, pick your daughter, too

You'll pick your son, pick your daughter, too

You're a fraud, and all your fans should know you're a fraud.

You're back to your old self. Congratulations, Ronald.

You're gonna be okay.

You're gonna have to go through a lot of crap,

You're gonna have to spend your birthday in jail.

You're not bleeding, it's just water.

Your arms are hanging limp at your sides

Your arms are hanging limp at your sides

Your brother loves you, Vanaya, and he'd do anything for ye.

Your brother loves you, Vanaya.

Your father would've just loved this one.

Your gonad is being used for research.

Your host, Rod Decker.

Your house is a real palace.

Your idea? Did you come up with it?

Your legs got nothing to do

Your legs got nothing to do

Your mom's smoking hot.

Your mother wept so hard that her milk dried.

500?

'Cause we are in desperate need of sexy nightwear.

'Cause you're good.

'Tis ripe and delicious, though.

"'And besides, it's always good to have a spare."'

"'Aroo?' questioned Balzaak.

"'Don't give me that, you crazy wolf,' erupted Brutus.

"'l'm sorry, Brutus, we had to borrow one of your gonads.

"'Now let us in."'

"'We're investigating ways to strengthen the military."'

"'You know why l put that in there. Perhaps they can clone me.

"""This isn"t a wart, this is the chancellor of the galaxy.

"a voice spoke to him from across the room.

"As Brutus struggled to free himself from the medical pod,

"Collect me in your wings

"He loves solving animal murders.

"He loves to have rice pudding with his tea.

"He rides Jacques for pleasure."

"He rides Paris France on the brick roads in London,

"l am just a man, and l want to breed

"looking for mysterious things.

"Must rupture the moon crust,"" she's thinking.

"No more sweets in the mammary cannon

"Pierre has two horses, Jacques and Paris France, both girls.

"Pierre used to be a jockey in college.

"Referring to her neck, she squawked,

"Together we will learn to love

"Within my breast meat, there is a famine

"You are Gorgana, my eagle, my queen

"You gorgeous hag, you freak machine"

"Your ovaries will destroy me

(ALL GASP)

(ALL LAUGHlNG)

(AUDlENCE APPLAUDlNG)

(AUDlENCE APPLAUDlNG)

(AUDlENCE APPLAUDlNG) WOMAN: l love you, Ronald !

(AUDlENCE EXCLAlMlNG)

(AUDlENCE MURMURlNG)

(BELCHlNG)

(BOTH BLOWlNG)

(BOTH EXCLAlMlNG lN EXClTEMENT)

(BOTH LAUGHlNG)

(BUS ENGlNE STARTlNG)

(BUS ENGlNE STARTlNG)

(CARRY ON WAYWARD SON PLAYlNG)

(CLEARS THROAT)

(CLEARS THROAT)

(CLlCKlNG)

(CONTlNUES MOANlNG)

(COUGHS)

(CRYlNG)

(CRYlNG)

(DOOR SHUTS)

(EXCLAlMlNG)

(EXCLAlMlNG)

(EXCLAlMlNG)

(EXCLAlMlNG)

(EXCLAlMlNG)

(EXCLAlMlNG) Yes.

(EXCLAlMS)

(EXCLAlMS)

(EXCLAlMS)

(EXCLAlMS)

(EXCLAlMS)

(EXCLAlMS)

(EXCLAlMS)

(EXCLAlMS)

(EXHALES)

(EXHALES)

(FEEDBACK SCREECHlNG)

(GASPS)

(GASPS)

(GASPS)

(GASPS)

(GROANlNG)

(GROANlNG)

(GROANS)

(GROANS)

(GROANS)

(GROANS)

(GRUNTlNG)

(GRUNTlNG)

(GRUNTS)

(GRUNTS)

(GULPS)

(GUNSHOT)

(GUNSHOTS FlRlNG)

(HlSSlNG)

(HORSE NElGHlNG)

(HORSE NElGHlNG)

(IN THE YEAR 2525 PLAYING)

(JUDlTH CRYlNG)

(JUDlTH CRYlNG)

(JUDlTH EXCLAlMS)

(JUDlTH SOBBlNG)

(JUST LlKE JESSE JAMES PLAYlNG)

(KEYS CLACKlNG)

(KNOCKlNG ON DOOR)

(KNOCKlNG ON DOOR) JUDlTH: Benjamin.

(LAUGHlNG)

(lN THE YEAR 2525 PLAYING)

(lNAUDlBLE)

(lNAUDlBLE)

(lNAUDlBLE)

(LONNlE READlNG)

(LONNlE READlNG)

(MEOWS)

(MOANlNG)

(MOANlNG) Oh, yeah.

(MUSlC STOPS)

(MUSlC STOPS)

(MYSTERlOUS MUSlC PLAYlNG ON SPEAKER)

(PARANOlD PLAYlNG)

(PEOPLE EXCLAlMlNG lN AWE)

(PEOPLE GASP)

(PEOPLE MURMURlNG)

(PHONE RlNGlNG)

(PHONE RlNGlNG)

(PHONE RlNGlNG)

(PlANO PLAYlNG SCHMALTZY MUSlC)

(POWERlNG DOWN)

(SCREAMlNG)

(SCREAMlNG)

(SCREAMlNG)

(SCREAMlNG)

(SlGHS)

(SlGHS)

(SlGHS)

(SlGHS)

(SlGHS) l'm not seeing it.

(SlNGlNG) And so as you hear these words telling you now of my state

(SMOOTH JAZZ MUSlC PLAYlNG)

(SNAKE HlSSlNG)

(SNARLlNG)

(SNlFFlNG)

(SNlFFlNG)

(SNORlNG)

(SOBBlNG)

(SPLASHES)

(STAG BELLOWlNG)

(STUDENTS CHATTERlNG)

(TABATHA CHUCKLES)

(TABATHA SCREAMlNG)

(TABATHA SCREAMlNG)

(TABATHA WHOOPlNG)

(TAPE REWlNDlNG)

(TlRES SCREECH)

(TOlLET FLUSHlNG)

(WHOOPlNG)

(WHOOPlNG)

(WlND OF CHANGE PLAYING)

(YELPS)