The Cable Guy (1996) Edit

A little JosÈ Eber...

A man was beaten in a restroom by a bathroom attendant.

A man was beaten in a restroom by a bathroom attendant.

All right, already!

All right.

All right.

All set!

All she had to do was say no. She didn't have to kick me out.

All the complicated splendor that is woman.

And those hair plugs...

Anyway, the cable company in town fired a guy six months ago...

Are you all right?

Are you having a little domestic discord?

Are you prepared for a night of feasting and sport...

Bad boys, what you gonna do?

Brace yourself.

Breast.

But I get really lonely. Look at me!

But I'd hate to have to show Robin this.

But there are a lot of cable boys and girls who still have a chance!

But there are a lot of cable boys and girls who still have a chance!

But what doesn't kill us makes us stronger, right?

But you're too needy. It's a real turn off. Ask Robin.

Cable guy!

Can I be frank?

Can I have your skin? Check this out.

Center.

Check it.

Check vital signs.

Cherish him, Robin. Every hair on his head.

Chick alert, 2 o'clock. What a licorice.

Chip Douglas? That sounds familiar.

Chip, over here!

Chip, this isn't funny! Stop it!

Chip! Chip.

Cleanliness is next to godliness.

Come again?

Come back so that I may brain thee!

Come on down! Are you waiting for an invitation?

Come on, baby.

Come on, baby. Talk to me.

Cool. Pick you up at 6:30.

Daddy can play rough!

Damn it. The cable's out.

Deluxe karaoke machine. Big screen TV.

Did he say that?

Did I tell you to have a karaoke jam with him?

Did you hear that?

Do you mean that Heather is a prostitute?

Do you really want to know my name?

Do you want to tell them something?

Does it go to your boss?

Don't dig too deep. You might get burned by the molten lava.

Don't do that! You'Il get me killed!

Don't do this. You just need help. We all get lonely.

Don't sit so close to that thing. It's going to rot your brain.

Don't tell her. I'll help you get her back.

Don't worry about Robin. I'll take care of her.

Don't worry about the tip. But I've got one for you.

Don't you understand, Steven?

Dost thust have thou a mug of ale for me and me mate?

Down, down, down. Red knight going down!

Eat! Keep eating!

Everything was going so well.

Excuse me.

Excuse me. What's the story with our chicken?

Fine.

Foul!

Friends don't speak to each other like that.

Funny, how you call when you need something.

Gail tells me you're coming out of a relationship.

George Jetson. Jean Luc Picard.

Get a feeling about them, and ask them if they'd like a drink.

Giving me free cable. Only you would do something like that.

Go.

God bless you. You're too good to me.

Good fight. Good fight.

Good morning, and how are we today?

Good. Keep it up. It's your ass.

Good. That makes me feel better.

Goodbye, Jim.

Goodbye, Steven. Click.

Goodbye.

Hang in there, pal! You're going to make it, buddy!

Hard.

Have the eggs had a chance to hatch? Maybe you can go check on it for me.

He gave you a big screen TV and a hi fi system as a present?

He got all the movie channels for free. Did you ever hear of that?

He has been pitched in battle for a fortnight and has a king's thirst.

He mentioned that you've had some problems.

He was speaking another language. I'm pretty sure...

He's changing. You'll have to learn to live with that.

He's having a super time.

He's just an utterly useless person. I think I hate him.

He's so pathetic. I think I hate him. Hate him...

Hello, Clarice. It's good to see you again.

Hello, mama.

Help. Help.

Hey, Bernie, how's that sports package?

Hey, Phil.

Hey, Rick! I never made a slam dunk before. Thanks for the boost.

Hey, Steven. Give me a ring. I'm at 555 4329.

Hey, wait! Come back.

Hey. It should be on now.

Hey. It was my treat.

Hi, Rick.

Hi, this is Robin Harris.

Hi, this is Robin Harris. Steven doesn't live here anymore...

His boss was Larry Tate, from a show called Bewitched.

Hold on. I have call waiting.

How about this?

How else could I get the stuff in?

I am now.

I apologize about last night. I came home and I just fell asleep.

I appreciate you helping me out with Robin.

I asked a woman to marry me once.

I borrowed this sweatshirt. Bacon and eggs, coming up.

I came as soon as I could.

I can be your friend or your enemy. You seem to prefer the latter.

I cannot listen to you, for you are my sworn enemy.

I come up here to think sometimes. Clear my head.

I didn't do anything! Just call my cable guy.

I didn't order that.

I don't believe you. It's another trick.

I don't ever want to see you again. Robin will never forgive me.

I don't know what your story is, but I'm going to find out.

I don't listen to you. I pretend to understand.

I don't really have a plan.

I don't think you listen to her. You tell her what she wants to hear.

I feel good about this.

I forgive you. I only hope my neurologist will feel the same.

I fought the law, and the law won.

I got you the big screen TV, deluxe karaoke machine...

I guess you have a secret admirer.

I had the best time the other night. When will I see you again?

I hate visiting my parents.

I have an upgrade order for one Robin Harris.

I have this friend, and he gave his cable guy $50.

I heard him say they were taking a ride on the information highway.

I hope they fry this bastard.

I just have some paperwork for you to fill out.

I just want to hang out! No big deal!

I just wanted to be your friend...

I knew I'd get you on the phone that way.

I knew you'd like it. I come twice a week.

I know what to do. The cable guy is a friend of mine.

I learned the facts of life from watching The Facts of Life!

I love this game.

I made you breakfast, and we were eating...

I ought to know when I see a good ball.

I saw someone. He looked Asian.

I see. We're playing prison rules, huh?

I shouldn't be telling you this...

I think it was an Asian gang or something.

I think Robin and I are getting back together.

I think your machine is

I want to go home now. I'm worried about Steven.

I want you out of my apartment. And get this stuff out of here.

I wanted to do something for you, but you needed space, so...

I was getting so used to rejection. I really liked her.

I will not touch it.

I won't do it. I've had enough!

I... I don't hate you.

I'd love to chat, but I'm getting together with a lady friend.

I'd strike while the iron is hot. He who hesitates, masturbates.

I'll be home later.

I'll be your pal. Just come on up!

I'll call you later

I'll juice you up.

I'll see if I can track him down. What was his name?

I'll talk to the judge. I'll put the system on trial.

I'm a preferred customer. All I have to do is page him.

I'm at the office. Call me. Bye.

I'm blinded! My eyes!

I'm coming. Don't leave.

I'm going moment to moment now.

I'm hysterical now. What were we talking about?

I'm interested in learning about the complicated splendor that is you.

I'm just here to comfort you.

I'm just jerking your chain.

I'm just joking with you.

I'm just messing with you.

I'm just messing with you.

I'm more patient. I'm more loving. They tell me this.

I'm not good at that stuff. What if he says no?

I'm not sure how to say this.

I'm out of here.

I'm out on bail.

I'm really a man.

I'm sorry to put you out.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. Can you help me out?

I'm Tabitha Soren. Today in the Sam Sweet case...

I'm Tabitha Soren. Today in the Sam Sweet case...

I'm your serving wench, Melinda. Care for something from the barkeep?

I've got a lot of tables.

I've got to warm up! I don't want to pull a hammy.

I've had a few drinks, so buckle up.

I've said too much.

If only someone would dump him.

If Robin had seen you, she'd be begging you to come back.

If they're doing well financially, maybe their relationships suffer.

If you build it, he will come.

If you get a new wife, do you get to have sex with her?

If you screw this project up, it's not going to be my ass.

In movies, women always scratch the man when they're having sex.

In preparing your service...

In the Sam Sweet Trial, the jury is close to a verdict.

Is this guy cool? Just joking. Come in, you psycho.

Is this what you want? Is this where you need it?

Isn't it funny that we ended up like this?

It appears as if someone has updated your home entertainment system.

It was Asian.

It was Jerry Springer's final thought on Friday's show.

It's a drag. You just get to know somebody and then the job is done.

It's a kick in the face with a steel toe work boot...

It's a little crazy right now...

It's available in foreclosure.

It's embarrassing, I don't even know your name.

It's like working for Mr. Magoo. And those hair plugs...

It's like working for Mr. Magoo. If only someone would dump him.

It's me again. I was taking a whiz. Thought you might have called.

It's no big deal. Whatever.

It's okay! I understand my purpose now!

It's okay. She's totally clean. I checked her out about a week ago.

It's Ricardo.

It's Robin on line two.

It's the fun bus. Come on!

It's the summer of love, baby. Let's leave these two alone.

Jefferson Airplane performed this song in Gimme Shelter...

Jesus. Where's the cable guy already?

Jesus. Where's the cable guy already?

Just sit there with Mr. Babysitter, and he'll take good care of you.

Just take it easy, all right?

Larry Tate. But at first he said his name was Chip Douglas.

Last week, the billing was transferred to one Robin Harris.

Let the games begin! The blue knight rules!

Let's break the cherry on that karaoke machine.

Let's do this.

Let's go home.

Let's just keep our eyes open.

Let's see what you got, White Shadow.

Let's take a look.

Life wasn't sweet after their program was canceled.

Like I'm a goddamn plumber or something.

Listen, a piece of advice:

Lock down!

Look at the pretty boy!

Looks good.

Master Steven Kovacs and Lord Chip, come to the fighting pit!

Maybe a few buts. Big ones!

Maybe I shouldn't have come at all. Jerk off!

Maybe I'll show you the satellite, how this whole thing works.

Medieval Times?

Most appreciated.

Most people never take the time to understand how the cable works.

Mr. Davis, do you take cream and sugar in your eye?

Mr. Sweet confessed one month later.

Mr. Sweet confessed one month later.

Murray Slaughter.

My brother is a speech therapist.

My brother thought it might help you.

My cable's fine.

My dad might as well have been away.

My guests have crushes on food service workers.

My leg! I have a cramp.

My lisp is gone!

Necessity is the mother of invention.

Never mind.

Never thought they'd get the floors clean after what happened.

Nice jump, Spiderman!

No sweat off my sack.

No, but I give all the knights free cable.

No, I couldn't. No, I really couldn't.

No, I was just making conversation. Forget it.

No, it goes to me. I'm kind of a perfectioniss...

No!

No.

No. Don't do that!

No. It's too late for me.

Nobody named Chip Douglas works for the cable company.

None of them say no.

Now I'm on a mission.

Of course. We couldn't get a woman like that without paying.

Oh, Billy.

Oh, God!

Oh, hey, hey, hey.

Oh, look what I've done.

Oh, Lord.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. My twin brother's been shot.

Oh, no.

Oh, shit.

Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!

Okay, I'm going!

Okay, I'm home. Give me a buzz when you get in.

Okay.

Okay.

Oklahoma!

One of the things that initiated a misunderstanding...

Only every five minutes. Frankly I'm sick of hearing it.

Open, sesame.

Out!

Out. Now.

Parental discretion advised.

Penis.

People rarely take advantage of my services. I'll help you wash up.

Perfectionis... t.

Pick a word.

Preferred customer, my ass!

Prepare to defibrillate! Clear!

Prepare to defibrillate! Clear!

Pretty smooth work. I set them up, you knock them down.

Promise me you'Il never go bungee jumping in Mexico.

Quickly! Muster atop your steed.

Reality isn't Father Knows Best anymore.

Really? So you called me.

Really? That's sweet.

Remember his clue.

Remember Midnight Express? Oliver Stone won an Academy Award.

Resist the urge at all costs. It'll pay off in the end.

Rick Legatos, please.

Ricky Ricardo.

Robin and I are having difficulties. I think it's only temporary.

Robin showed me her birthmark. It's very sexy.

Robin, you're on my team. Steven, you're with Mom.

Robin, you're on my team. Steven, you're with Mom.

Robin? I love you too.

Sam turned to petty larceny...

See what I'm saying?

See you! Bye.

See you.

She got vagina!

She loves me, she loves me not. She loves me...

She wanted to think about it. We agreed to take some time apart.

She wants you to thirst for knowledge about who she is.

She was a working girl, but she liked you.

She's no longer with us.

She's pretty. Don't kiss her. Don't even touch her.

She's sending entertainment and information to millions of citizens.

Should I? So I'm the tardy one?

Sign here.

Silence of the Lambs.

Skooch over just a tad.

Slip the cable guy 50 bucks, he'll give you all the movie channels for free.

Smile! That's going to be a good one.

Smite him!

So ends day 54 of the trial of former child star, Sam Sweet...

So he starts talking about calling somebody else to do it.

So I say, "Hey, it's just a show! What are you trying to prove?"

So that's how it's going to be? You want to play rough?

So you're blowing me off again. I won't put up with it anymore.

So your lady kicked you out.

So?

Somebody has to kill the babysitter.

Sometimes you don't know what you've got till it's gone.

Soon every home will integrate their television, phone and computer!

Soon every home will integrate their television, phone and computer.

Sorry about yesterday. How did evertyhing go with you?

Squad 51. Man down. Possible back injury.

Stay away from Robin. She's taken.

Steve! Steven!

Steven called the fuzz!

Steven doesn't live here anymore...

Steven is carrying his battle ax and chasing me.

Steven, call your mother.

Steven, I'm open! Feed me the rock!

Steven, it's Mom. Call me. I'm still your mother, you know.

Steven, Steven, Steven.

Steven? Steven.

Steven. Steven.

Stevie, time to leavie!

Stevie, you did it, man.

Stop at 4000 and a spin.

Take care of him, Robin. He's good people.

Tell her you're cooking yourself dinner and watching it by yourself.

Tell me where you like it.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thanks for the delightful evening. I guess I'll be leaving now.

Thanks.

That about does it. My work is done.

That guy is devoted to you.

That isn't how it's done. I'd rather just see somebody I like.

That little thing...

That was hot up there.

That was so sweet of you.

That'll be a good one.

That'll take care of the shine. Now, let's pluck those eyebrows!

That's illegal. You could be fined up to $5000 or go to jail.

That's it.

That's my humor. Thanks for coming out.

That's so sad that you know that.

That's the spirit. Let's give them a show!

That's tough. You must have a lot of abandonment issues.

That's what I came here to say.

That's what I have to do!

That's why Mommy is going to happy hour.

That's your sweet spot, right there.

The cable company fired you.

The cable guy is missing in action. I hope he gets here before I die.

The comment card. Please mail it in when I'm done.

The day started real nice, but now the moisture is increasing.

The future is now!

The future is now!

The jury has notified the judge that they've reached a verdict.

The name is Spock. If we don't fight to the death, they'll kill us both.

The old McNair place.

The password is...

The password is...

The password is...

The red knight sucks the big one! You're going down, red knight!

The soothing sounds of Raul, ladies and gentlemen.

The trouble with real life is, there's no danger music.

The twins were stars of the hit sitcom Double Trouble...

The weather is always nice in here. The winters are remarkably mild!

There are 24 classrooms. Each can be converted into a home.

There she is.

There's a swimming pool, tennis courts, a gym and a stage...

There's no end to the possibilities!

There's something in everyone's life they could improve.

These knights get laid all the time.

They call me the pumper. I'll be your friend.

They had a lot of cats.

This can't be happening.

This concludes our broadcast day. Click.

This concludes our broadcast day. Click.

This could be a cool pad.

This has nothing to do with you as a person

This is a safe place. You're with people who love you.

This is going to be the best damn karaoke jam ever.

This is just a sign that you need to live a little.

This is like when Spock fought Kirk. Best friends forced to do battle.

This is Medieval Times!

This is the man who framed me.

This is the moment we've been waiting for. The jury is ready...

This isn't a movie! This is reality!

This isn't funny!

This isn't Star Trek.

This television funny man killed his brother in cold blood.

Tit?

To make sure she was good. And I'm healthy as a horse. Not a drip.

Tonight on UPN: The trial that has captured the nation.

Tonight on UPN: The trial that has captured the nation.

Tonight, it's my turn.

Touch it. You need human contact.

Tough room, but you got them. How you feeling?

Two noblemen from our audience will battle to the death...

Wait. I need to use the head. I want to find out about your job.

Wake up. Smell the smelling salt.

Way to go. Now they'll probably give him my job.

We are live. The jury is seated and the verdict...

We have reached the climax of our competition.

We have to be careful not to hurt each other, right?

We have to find an architect.

We have to get you out of here. I was watching Court TV.

We just had a baby born at the party.

We met a week ago, but I feel I've always known him.

We need an ambulance over by the scaffolding!

We see thunderstorms...

We should go again next week.

We'll all go out together and have a Heineken. Yeah!

We'll be right back.

We're not friends. I don't even know you.

We're not officially back together. And you said time apart is good.

We're really bopping!

Weird. I thought I'd see if anybody wanted to play round ball.

Welcome to a magnificent journey into the past.

Well done, good sir. You are the victor.

Well, you're a nice guy. Many customers treat me like snot.

What are you doing?

What do you mean, buy what? The women.

What happened?

What happened?

What is your ?

What the hell is wrong with you?

What?

What?

What's up, Steve? I'm at a pay phone. If you're there, pick up.

When I was a kid, my mom worked nights. I never met my father.

When your love is truly giving, it will come back to you tenfold.

Where are you?

Where are you?

Who broke this?

Why are you doing this? You're sabotaging yourself.

Why don't you come by?

Why should I help you? I gave you free cable.

With a cash bid, we can steal this thing.

Woman.

Women love Sleepless in Seattle. It's on HBO this month.

Yeah.

Yeah. I was going to the bed and bath place. Now it's closed.

Yes, it is. Yes, it is. It is to me.

Yes! Yes!

Yes.

Yes. Time apart from each other, but not with other people.

Yo, Stevie!

You are too easy.

You can shop from your home, or play video games with someone in Vietnam.

You can shop from your home, or play video games with someone in Vietnam.

You expected Mike and Carol Brady to raise me.

You give me friendship. We're even.

You give me something more valuable. Friendship.

You got in here when I was out?

You guys play here too?

You have the right to remain silent.

You have to admit, it's a cool place for an ending.

You have to spend the weekend here.

You have to take this stuff back.

You hear anything?

You know... Give each other space.

You look just like Dizzy Gillespie.

You looked at Ray and said, "I want him to be my boyfriend...

You might even have got a freebie.

You might want to put on a bathing suit.

You need to come down and refuel.

You never played Porno Password? It's the adult version of the show.

You never told me your real name.

You put our cajones on the table and you slam dunked it.

You still want to know my name?

You stupid son of a bitch.

You two will be just fine.

You want me to quiet down and chill out in front of the TV?

You were never there for me, were you, Mother?

You'd been drinking, and you thought you were making love to me.

You'll be able to visit the Louvre, or watch female mud wrestling.

You'll be able to visit the Louvre, or watch female mud wrestling.

You'll be channel surfing in no time.

You'll find out.

You'll have to do better than that, Steven.

You'll need to look your best.

You're a nice guy, but I just don't have time for a new friend.

You're breaking the rules. What is it?

You're damn right, I'm right.

You're going on a date?

You're on a big date.

You're right. That's incredibly insightful.

You're sexy.

You're the judges.

You're under arrest for receiving stolen property.

You've been working hard. Take a break.

Your nostrils flare when you're mad.

An ending to what? It's like GoldenEye.

Are you a friend of Steven's? I'm proud to say that I am.

Are you guys going out a lot? Not really.

Are you okay? I'm fine.

Are you okay? I'm fine. Don't I look fine?

Are you ready to rock? The concert. Oh, Jesus.

Bastard! Let's just have a good time.

But the TV was always there. I know what you mean.

Bye. Bye bye.

Bye. Bye.

Cable guy! Don't leave!

Cable guy. Oh, great.

Call me later if you're around. Sure, as soon as I get home.

Can I get you a beer? How about a tequila?

Can I leave it here till Saturday? Sure. No problem.

Can I pass? Don't be a stick in the mud.

Can't we work this out? I wish we could.

Center! Nipple?

Chip and Ernie Douglas. I have a list of ex cable men.

Chip Douglas, you're on my team. No way.

Chip Douglas? The cable guy.

Come on. I promised Steven I wouldn't say.

Could I get a knife and fork? There were none in medieval times.

Crybaby. I love you.

Did anybody notice I'm late? You've been here for an hour.

Do you know what I mean? I'm on it.

Don't do that. I'm here for you!

Don't let your eggs get cold. Buy what?

Don't look. You're just playing with me.

Enjoy your meal. Thank you.

Erection? No. But thanks for noticing.

Get out. What?

Glad you accepted my invitation. Steven invited me.

Good evening, sir. Hey, Stretch.

Great. We need another man. Chip Douglas, my cable guy.

Hair plugs. Hair plugs... Oh, shit.

Have you noticed anything? No. Things are going really well.

He did it! He did it!

He takes things too seriously. The guy almost took my head off.

He's a good man. Yeah.

He's a lunatic and a felon. Everybody just relax.

He's angry with me. I should go. No.

He's not with the cable company? Yahtzee!

Hello? Bingo! My Three Sons.

Hello? We could have been blood brothers.

Hello. I love you.

Help me! Hang on!

Here comes our hero. Okay. Easy.

Hey, Rick, phone. Hello? Hey, how's the move going?

Hey. I'm Steven. Heather.

Hi. Is there a problem? My cable's out.

How about tomorrow? Chip.

How do you know about us? Free cable's an aphrodisiac.

How do you know this? Jed's got cable.

How much did all of this cost? Practically nothing.

How's Hal? The guy has no vision.

How's Hal? The man has no vision.

How's it going? Good.

How's it going? Hey, buddy!

I can't accept this. Why not?

I can't believe she's doing this. You shouldn't have proposed.

I certainly hope so. Will she scratch up your back?

I don't know anything about this. Do not speak until spoken to.

I got you a little something. You said we were even.

I guess we're done. Thanks for bringing your friend.

I invited him at lunch. At lunch?

I know it's you. Sorry. Where was I?

I love you, but I have to go. Bye. Bye.

I moved a few things, okay? Yeah, I guess.

I need to talk to you. It shall wait.

I promise. Anyway...

I proposed, and she kicked me out. I hate that.

I really don't want to play. Come on, Steven.

I told you to stay away from him. You said I could get free cable.

I wish I had friends like that. Get out of my house.

I would have said "schlong. " Now we're starting to get this!

I'm coming! Cable guy!

I'm just so tired, Steven. Where are you?

I'm just talking trash. You ruined the game.

I'm on Steven's team. I'll switch teams. Let's play.

I've got to go. Talk to you later. All right.

If you need anything, let me know. I got it under control.

Is it a man named Steven? I can't say.

Is it safe? Sure! That's what the armor's for.

Is that how you treat people? I've been busy. Robin is here.

Is there a Steven Kovacs here? Yeah. What's the problem?

Is! Is! Isn't! Isn't!

It didn't have to be this way. What are you planning to do?

It doesn't. They ask you. I'm starting to notice that.

It's a little complicated. It always is.

It's just skin, Steven. I don't want to do it anymore!

It's nice to see you doing well. It's nice just to see you.

Jamie, I... No!

Just install my cable, please. Suit yourself.

Keep them closed. Pretty well. The other night...

Leave him alone! I saw that movie six times!

Let's get it on. You any good?

Let's go! Just give me a minute!

Let's go. What's going on?

Let's not make any more rules. Okay.

Look who decided to show. You should have come hours ago.

Look, I have to tell you Hold that thought. Show's on.

Male witches are the worst kind. He's not a witch.

May I help you? No. I'm meeting someone here.

Maybe I will. Whatever.

Mommy's got to go out now. When will I get a brother?

More Pepsi? There was Pepsi, but no utensils?

No, Sammy! Look who's crying now.

No. I can't say that to my mother. She can handle it.

Okay. I crossed the line. Sorry. You didn't cross the line.

On to the next order of business. Steven, I need to talk to you.

One guy doing another guy a solid. That is so nice.

Or a slice of pizza? Does it still work this way?

Penis. Vagina?

Pleasant night, isn't it? Yeah, not too bad.

Robin Harris. Hey, it's Chip Douglas.

Robin! She just left with the cable guy!

She got it! Mom.

She said I pressed too hard. Women are a labyrinth, my friend.

She'Il come running. Maybe I'll give it a try.

She's all over you. Shut up.

She's having fun. You should too. Maybe you're right.

Should I be worried? No. Maybe I'm being too nervous.

Sleepless in Seattle is on TV. I love that movie.

Smells like heartbreak to me. I don't want to discuss that.

So how's work? Work's good.

So you're all right? I'm a big boy.

Someone called The Big Ragoo. Carmine, from Laverne & Shirley.

Sometimes time apart is healthy. You're right.

Steven! I'm coming!

Stop it! Steven! I'm coming!

Sure, we should do that one day. How about tomorrow?

That was a travel! Whatever you say, Chip!

That was fast. Yeah.

That's pretty impressive. I knew you'd appreciate this.

That's your bait. Robin loves that movie.

The company puts you on hold. Thanks. You'Il get good marks.

The moment of truth... Jacob Sweet has been found...

This can't be happening. It's killing your mother.

This differs from a normal massage? It's more sexual.

This is important. But calling me back isn't?

This is our destiny! No, it's not!

This is... There's no words... It's no big deal.

Those hair plugs. Get out.

Tomorrow night we hang out. Fine, anything you want.

Tomorrow's no good. You'Il be stewing about your ex?

Unbelievable. It's no trouble.

Wait! Cable guy!

We knew this would happen. Nothing is happening!

We love you. I hate you! Get out of my life!

We're going to do battle. Is this a normal part of the show?

What a night. Just what I needed. I'll tell you something.

What are you doing tomorrow? Cook dinner and watch a movie.

What are you doing? Stop it. I know how you're feeling!

What are you trying to say? I don't want to be your friend.

What do you do? Can we talk in the other room?

What do you mean? You can buy next time.

What do you think? What is all this?

What does that mean? Karaoke jam. No ifs, ands or buts.

What have you ever done for me? Anything you want.

What is he doing here? I invited him.

What is it? He doesn't seem like himself.

What? Robin. I got her back for you.

What's with the cut cord? That's for effect. Until tomorrow.

What's wrong? You seem weird. You had me sent to jail.

What's your real name? Larry Tate. That's not important.

When can you get me out? There'll be no bail hearing today.

Where did Heather go? She left early this morning.

Where exactly are we going? To ride the information highway.

Who is it? It's the cable guy.

Who told you that? Forget it.

Why are you doing this to me? You did this to you.

Why didn't you take my call? I can't always pick up the phone.

Woman. Man?

Would you like some juice? You're kidding. She's your friend.

Yes, it is! Yes, it is! No, it isn't! No, it isn't!

You are being an asshole. Do you see what's happening?

You are in a high voltage area. What's that?

You didn't have to do that. I I wanted to.

You didn't hear it from me. Hold on.

You do? Sure.

You had honey in your voice. Do a song for us.

You have 11 new messages. All right.

You have a warrior's instinct. I had a real feeling of power.

You have no messages. Nobody loves you.

You have some nice friends. They're just preferred customers.

You have the right to an attorney. I didn't accept any stolen goods.

You haven't called Robin? No. I'm giving her her space.

You look great. And you are a vision.

You look like a new man. I feel like a new man.

You look rested. Come here.

You mean illegal cable? Yeah.

You might know her. Stay away from her!

You set me up. No. I taught you a lesson.

You're hitting bottom. Stay away.

You're not fine. I just want to get this over with.

You're overreacting. No! He's fooling you all.

You're pretty love struck, huh? I miss her.

You're sure? Uh huh. I'm fine.

You've been blowing me off. This guy's doing a number on me.

Your turn! Center.

...a film about how the Hell's Angels had their way at a Stones concert.

...a touch of Alfalfa...

...and a trip to the hospital for reconstructive surgery.

...and THX quality sound that would make George Lucas cream his pants.

...and... we're ready to dry you off!

...but he thinks you're the cat's pajamas.

...but he's got to change. " What are you talking about?

...but I screwed it up.