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Home > Evan Almighty (2007)
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Evan Almighty (2007)

Evan Almighty (2007)

Evan Almighty is a comedic film released in 2007, starring Steve Carell as the protagonist. The movie is a sequel to Bruce Almighty (2003) and follows the story of Evan Baxter, a news anchor turned congressman who is given a divine mission by God, portrayed by Morgan Freeman. Encouraged to build an ark in preparation for a flood, Evan faces numerous challenges, both personal and public, as he embarks on this extraordinary task. The movie features a talented ensemble cast including Lauren Graham, John Goodman, and Wanda Sykes. If you are interested in reliving the laughter and excitement of Evan Almighty, you can play and download the sounds of this unforgettable comedy right here.

Evan Almighty (2007) Evan Almighty Sheep Bruce Almighty (2003) Evan Breen Evan Sanders Evan Edinger Evan Edits Evan Evan's Remains エヴァンの残したもの Vide… Gator Westworld Season 2 Betas Season 1 Fraud SFX Pineapple Express (2008) This Is the End (2013) Fist Fight The Interview (2014) The Interview (2014) The Interview Trailer Pineapple Express (2008) Knock Knock Trailer 💬 Roberto Benigni TTS Computer AI Voice
A flood? Rolling out.
A flood? Rolling out.
Access is just a word you're using to hide what's really going on here.
Access is just a word you're using to hide what's really going on here.
According to my source, the show hasn't even started yet.
According to my source, the show hasn't even started yet.
All right, boys! Let's go! Let's go!
All right, boys! Let's go! Let's go!
All right, Eugene, Congressman Long's bill. What is it?
All right, Eugene, Congressman Long's bill. What is it?
All right, everybody! Say escrow!
All right, everybody! Say escrow!
All right, see you later!
All right, see you later!
All right. So our little Marlboro Man moment didn't work out so well.
All right. So our little Marlboro Man moment didn't work out so well.
All right. Well, let's just start over.
All right. Well, let's just start over.
ALL: Baxter! Baxter!
ALL: Baxter! Baxter!
ALL: Baxter! Baxter! Baxter!
ALL: Baxter! Baxter! Baxter!
ALL: Change the world!
ALL: Change the world!
ALL: Change the world!
ALL: Change the world!
ALL: Escrow!
ALL: Escrow!
ALL: I pledge allegiance to the flag
ALL: I pledge allegiance to the flag
ALL: Indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
ALL: Indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.
Alpha and Omega Hardware?
Alpha and Omega Hardware?
Also, the new Congressional plates just came in.
Also, the new Congressional plates just came in.
An alpaca. They rarely spit at people unless frightened or abused.
An alpaca. They rarely spit at people unless frightened or abused.
An ark is huge! I don't even know where I would begin!
An ark is huge! I don't even know where I would begin!
An increase in domestic commerce. If you happen to like those things,
An increase in domestic commerce. If you happen to like those things,
And a shrimp's heart is in its head. Really?
And a shrimp's heart is in its head. Really?
And Congressman Baxter.
And Congressman Baxter.
And Congressman Baxter's coffee habits?
And Congressman Baxter's coffee habits?
And eight lots? What are you going to do with eight lots?
And eight lots? What are you going to do with eight lots?
And I don't think the big man himself could do a better job. Pretty cool, huh?
And I don't think the big man himself could do a better job. Pretty cool, huh?
And I get my own room, right? Yep.
And I get my own room, right? Yep.
And I know that with great power comes great responsibility.
And I know that with great power comes great responsibility.
And if anybody asks, tell them a flood's coming.
And if anybody asks, tell them a flood's coming.
And it's in!
And it's in!
And Jordan was very precise.
And Jordan was very precise.
And let me tell you something, you guys are gonna love this place.
And let me tell you something, you guys are gonna love this place.
And maybe a couple weekends after that.
And maybe a couple weekends after that.
And now you are going to hold my dishes.
And now you are going to hold my dishes.
And one more jackass.
And one more jackass.
And pulling the down payment out of your home equity? Very gutsy move.
And pulling the down payment out of your home equity? Very gutsy move.
And that I am now in a position of great power,
And that I am now in a position of great power,
And that I am now in a position of great power,
And that I am now in a position of great power,
And the adverse effects it may have on your bill?
And the adverse effects it may have on your bill?
And the next seven days, no showers, no storms.
And the next seven days, no showers, no storms.
And then passed out the surrounding lands to a group of private investors.
And then passed out the surrounding lands to a group of private investors.
And they finally fixed the phones. My new extension is 614.
And they finally fixed the phones. My new extension is 614.
And to the Republic, for which it stands...
And to the Republic, for which it stands...
And when you finally show up you look like the fifth Beatle.
And when you finally show up you look like the fifth Beatle.
And when you were a little boy, you were afraid of Gumby.
And when you were a little boy, you were afraid of Gumby.
And with the land use bill, he's gonna do the same thing with the national parks.
And with the land use bill, he's gonna do the same thing with the national parks.
And you know what? I think there's something for our fishermen up there.
And you know what? I think there's something for our fishermen up there.
And you say we're going to have a flood?
And you say we're going to have a flood?
And you're seeing live images of New York Noah's ark
And you're seeing live images of New York Noah's ark
And you're still sucking up.
And you're still sucking up.
And, by God, it's gonna happen. Now you look down there.
And, by God, it's gonna happen. Now you look down there.
And, ultimately, man must
And, ultimately, man must
Are birds.
Are birds.
Are you gonna run with the pack or are you gonna lone wolf it?
Are you gonna run with the pack or are you gonna lone wolf it?
Are you kidding me?
Are you kidding me?
Are you okay? I'm fine.
Are you okay? I'm fine.
As soon as you're feeling up to it, of course. You get yourself better.
As soon as you're feeling up to it, of course. You get yourself better.
Aviaries, sir.
Aviaries, sir.
Awkward!
Awkward!
Baxter's only a freshman, sir, but I think you'll find he is locked and loaded.
Baxter's only a freshman, sir, but I think you'll find he is locked and loaded.
Beautiful, isn't it? I remember creating this valley.
Beautiful, isn't it? I remember creating this valley.
Beautiful!
Beautiful!
Because if I could be like one man, it'd be him.
Because if I could be like one man, it'd be him.
Because the rain and the floods are coming.
Because the rain and the floods are coming.
Because we didn't leave our lives in Buffalo so you could sail the S.S. Depression.
Because we didn't leave our lives in Buffalo so you could sail the S.S. Depression.
Because you strike me as the type of guy who knows how to hit the ground running.
Because you strike me as the type of guy who knows how to hit the ground running.
Birds follow you.
Birds follow you.
Board the ark! Save yourselves!
Board the ark! Save yourselves!
BOTH: Change the world!
BOTH: Change the world!
BOTH: Leg power!
BOTH: Leg power!
BOTH: We are hamsters!
BOTH: We are hamsters!
Boy or girl? A little boy. And here he is.
Boy or girl? A little boy. And here he is.
Boys, will you excuse us, please? Your father and I need to have a little talk.
Boys, will you excuse us, please? Your father and I need to have a little talk.
BOYS: Yup.
BOYS: Yup.
Build the ark.
Build the ark.
Build your boat.
Build your boat.
Building an Ark the Old Fashioned Way.
Building an Ark the Old Fashioned Way.
Busted.
Busted.
Busy, busy, busy, busy. Nice meeting you. Take care. Oh, and...
Busy, busy, busy, busy. Nice meeting you. Take care. Oh, and...
But before we sign off, we'd like to congratulate our very own Evan Baxter,
But before we sign off, we'd like to congratulate our very own Evan Baxter,
But don't worry, sir, he's definitely not way mean.
But don't worry, sir, he's definitely not way mean.
But how...
But how...
But I got to get going, because, frankly, I have an ark to build.
But I got to get going, because, frankly, I have an ark to build.
But if you survive, they give you a bigger den. Have a seat.
But if you survive, they give you a bigger den. Have a seat.
But my husband says God told him to do it.
But my husband says God told him to do it.
But today is the day! It has to be. This just doesn't make any sense!
But today is the day! It has to be. This just doesn't make any sense!
But we got into this as a family
But we got into this as a family
But what's interesting is how it got into private hands.
But what's interesting is how it got into private hands.
But you want to stop progress to save the Earth. Go for it.
But you want to stop progress to save the Earth. Go for it.
But, Evan, we have to talk about the ark. It has to come down.
But, Evan, we have to talk about the ark. It has to come down.
But, two by two, animals of all kinds are working with Godspeed to build this ark.
But, two by two, animals of all kinds are working with Godspeed to build this ark.
Bye guys Bye bye
Bye guys Bye bye
Bye, guys! See you later.
Bye, guys! See you later.
Bye. See you. Good luck, honey.
Bye. See you. Good luck, honey.
Can I go to the bathroom? Me, too?
Can I go to the bathroom? Me, too?
Can I tase him?
Can I tase him?
Can you at least tell me what you're building?
Can you at least tell me what you're building?
Care to join me?
Care to join me?
Careful pulling out. Pedestrian in the crosswalk.
Careful pulling out. Pedestrian in the crosswalk.
Cold today, huh?
Cold today, huh?
Come on, BMIC, Big Man in Congress. Evan Baxter, the shark on the move.
Come on, BMIC, Big Man in Congress. Evan Baxter, the shark on the move.
Come on, Dad, why can't we keep him? I mean, we've got a new house.
Come on, Dad, why can't we keep him? I mean, we've got a new house.
Come on, Evan, be reasonable. You got to get rid of that beard.
Come on, Evan, be reasonable. You got to get rid of that beard.
Come on, Evan, this is it! This is why we came here!
Come on, Evan, this is it! This is why we came here!
Come on, let's go.
Come on, let's go.
Come on, Rita!
Come on, Rita!
Come on.
Come on.
Come on. I mean, a beard? A beard's so dirty.
Come on. I mean, a beard? A beard's so dirty.
Come on. Just let it go, just let it go.
Come on. Just let it go, just let it go.
Come on. We're in here!
Come on. We're in here!
Coming right up.
Coming right up.
Congratulations!
Congratulations!
Congressman Jenkins, Congressman Whitehall, Congressman Freeman,
Congressman Jenkins, Congressman Whitehall, Congressman Freeman,
Congressman Jim Dodd, head of Ways and Means.
Congressman Jim Dodd, head of Ways and Means.
Congressman Long did this? Did you say neighbor?
Congressman Long did this? Did you say neighbor?
Congressman Long eating your hot dog.
Congressman Long eating your hot dog.
Congressman Long got the approval to build a dam
Congressman Long got the approval to build a dam
Congressman Long's assistant just dropped this off.
Congressman Long's assistant just dropped this off.
Congressman Richard Stamp, head of Commerce,
Congressman Richard Stamp, head of Commerce,
Congressman, I'm sure St. Francis would be envious.
Congressman, I'm sure St. Francis would be envious.
Congressman, your name is being removed from this bill.
Congressman, your name is being removed from this bill.
CONGRESSMAN: No, of course not.
CONGRESSMAN: No, of course not.
Congressman!
Congressman!
Congressman!
Congressman!
Congressman! Hey, Marty!
Congressman! Hey, Marty!
Congressman! There you are!
Congressman! There you are!
CONGRESSPERSON: The flood.
CONGRESSPERSON: The flood.
CONGRESSPERSON: Will the Chairman yield?
CONGRESSPERSON: Will the Chairman yield?
CONGRESSWOMAN: I pledge allegiance to the flag...
CONGRESSWOMAN: I pledge allegiance to the flag...
Cover me up! Keep me dry! Cover me up! Keep me dry!
Cover me up! Keep me dry! Cover me up! Keep me dry!
Dad, guess what? I got all your stuff packed up so that we can...
Dad, guess what? I got all your stuff packed up so that we can...
Dad, I don't think that's the rains.
Dad, I don't think that's the rains.
Dad, we can do this, but we're gonna need some help.
Dad, we can do this, but we're gonna need some help.
Dad, what are you doing? I'm watching this.
Dad, what are you doing? I'm watching this.
Development means the advancement of jobs,
Development means the advancement of jobs,
Dictate what happens in this country.
Dictate what happens in this country.
Did you fall in a mine shaft?
Did you fall in a mine shaft?
Did you just come out of a coma?
Did you just come out of a coma?
Did you say build a boat?
Did you say build a boat?
Do me a favor. Love me less.
Do me a favor. Love me less.
Do the dance.
Do the dance.
Do we have anything unleavened?
Do we have anything unleavened?
Do you have a point, Congressman?
Do you have a point, Congressman?
Do you hear that? The rains are upon us!
Do you hear that? The rains are upon us!
Do you know what happens when one of these wolves decides to fend for itself?
Do you know what happens when one of these wolves decides to fend for itself?
Do you see him?
Do you see him?
Do you smell anthrax?
Do you smell anthrax?
Do you want to explain yourself, Congressman? What is going on?
Do you want to explain yourself, Congressman? What is going on?
Does God know he's going to get you fired?
Does God know he's going to get you fired?
Does this mean we're moving back home?
Does this mean we're moving back home?
Don't worry about it, you guys. Come on, eat up.
Don't worry about it, you guys. Come on, eat up.
Don't you dare take that ark down.
Don't you dare take that ark down.
Dropped like a leaf during the Pledge of Allegiance.
Dropped like a leaf during the Pledge of Allegiance.
Dylan, get back inside! It's too dangerous.
Dylan, get back inside! It's too dangerous.
DYLAN: Dad, there's a note.
DYLAN: Dad, there's a note.
Dylan! Jordan! Check it out! Your mom's building an ark!
Dylan! Jordan! Check it out! Your mom's building an ark!
Dylan.
Dylan.
Eight pounds, 11 ounces.
Eight pounds, 11 ounces.
Either him or Kareem.
Either him or Kareem.
Enjoy that office.
Enjoy that office.
Enough already!
Enough already!
EUGENE: He was actually right.
EUGENE: He was actually right.
Evacuate immediately! You have three minutes!
Evacuate immediately! You have three minutes!
Evan Baxter! You have gone from newsman to congressman to caveman.
Evan Baxter! You have gone from newsman to congressman to caveman.
Evan Baxter. Born June 15, 1962.
Evan Baxter. Born June 15, 1962.
Evan, even if it kept raining, it's not like it could cause a flood in a day.
Evan, even if it kept raining, it's not like it could cause a flood in a day.
Evan, faith will not fight this bill. The CINPLAN vote is today!
Evan, faith will not fight this bill. The CINPLAN vote is today!
Evan, sit down.
Evan, sit down.
Evan, talk to me.
Evan, talk to me.
Evan, that was brilliant. Risky, but brilliant.
Evan, that was brilliant. Risky, but brilliant.
Evan, think of the kids.
Evan, think of the kids.
Evan, what happened to you?
Evan, what happened to you?
Evan, what happened?
Evan, what happened?
Evan, what is going on?
Evan, what is going on?
Evan, what is happening to you?
Evan, what is happening to you?
Evan, you did it. You built the ark.
Evan, you did it. You built the ark.
Evan, you got to tell me these things. Think of the publicity angle on this!
Evan, you got to tell me these things. Think of the publicity angle on this!
EVAN: Baxter family, this is what's called a scenic vista.
EVAN: Baxter family, this is what's called a scenic vista.
EVAN: Careful, everyone. In the ark! In the ark!
EVAN: Careful, everyone. In the ark! In the ark!
EVAN: Come on, do the dance. DYLAN: I'm not doing the dance.
EVAN: Come on, do the dance. DYLAN: I'm not doing the dance.
EVAN: Gentlemen, I have saved the best for last.
EVAN: Gentlemen, I have saved the best for last.
EVAN: Here it is! Welcome to the good life.
EVAN: Here it is! Welcome to the good life.
EVAN: Here we go. RYAN: Oh, my God!
EVAN: Here we go. RYAN: Oh, my God!
EVAN: Keep it straight.
EVAN: Keep it straight.
EVAN: Ladies and gentlemen, this concludes day one
EVAN: Ladies and gentlemen, this concludes day one
EVAN: Pretty amazing, isn't it?
EVAN: Pretty amazing, isn't it?
EVAN: These too heavy? It's all right? JORDAN: No, it's fine.
EVAN: These too heavy? It's all right? JORDAN: No, it's fine.
EVAN: Well, I guess they don't want to go.
EVAN: Well, I guess they don't want to go.
EVAN: Wow.
EVAN: Wow.
EVAN: You guys all right?
EVAN: You guys all right?
EVAN: You psyched? Are you ready?
EVAN: You psyched? Are you ready?
Evan?
Evan?
Everybody! Please! Get on the ark!
Everybody! Please! Get on the ark!
Everyone, up the ramp! Onto the deck! Come on! Hurry, hurry, hurry!
Everyone, up the ramp! Onto the deck! Come on! Hurry, hurry, hurry!
Excuse me. Are you all right?
Excuse me. Are you all right?
Excuse me. Can I get a refill, please?
Excuse me. Can I get a refill, please?
Excuse me. Do I know you?
Excuse me. Do I know you?
Fine.
Fine.
First things first. I have been asked to junior cosponsor a bill.
First things first. I have been asked to junior cosponsor a bill.
Fish follow you.
Fish follow you.
Forget it! Many a man's been humbled by his first day in Congress.
Forget it! Many a man's been humbled by his first day in Congress.
From now on, let's keep the surprises to a maximum of, say, none. Understood?
From now on, let's keep the surprises to a maximum of, say, none. Understood?
G.
G.
Gave that dog a home.
Gave that dog a home.
Gen 6:14.
Gen 6:14.
Gene, plates, now. And Alex at the Buffalo office had her baby.
Gene, plates, now. And Alex at the Buffalo office had her baby.
Gene! Heel!
Gene! Heel!
Genesis 6:14.
Genesis 6:14.
Genesis 6:14.
Genesis 6:14.
Gentlemen, good to see you.
Gentlemen, good to see you.
Gentlemen, I'm sure you're all wondering why I've assembled you here today.
Gentlemen, I'm sure you're all wondering why I've assembled you here today.
Gentlemen, welcome. What an honor to have you here.
Gentlemen, welcome. What an honor to have you here.
Gesundheit.
Gesundheit.
Get it out, son. It's the beginning of wisdom.
Get it out, son. It's the beginning of wisdom.
Get off the boat now or you will be removed by force.
Get off the boat now or you will be removed by force.
Get on the ark! Everyone, on the ark now!
Get on the ark! Everyone, on the ark now!
Get that ball in position! We're clearing them out!
Get that ball in position! We're clearing them out!
Get the door! Get the door!
Get the door! Get the door!
Give me a minute. Lets see if I can convince Noah
Give me a minute. Lets see if I can convince Noah
Go back to the Hill and show them that you can and will fight this bill.
Go back to the Hill and show them that you can and will fight this bill.
Go crazy and build a gigantic ark.
Go crazy and build a gigantic ark.
Go find out where his license plates are. Everybody else, back to your holes.
Go find out where his license plates are. Everybody else, back to your holes.
Go to the car!
Go to the car!
Go, go, go! Get on the ark!
Go, go, go! Get on the ark!
Go, go, go! Get out!
Go, go, go! Get out!
Go, go, go! He tried to eat me!
Go, go, go! He tried to eat me!
Go, go, go! On the ark! Go, go, go!
Go, go, go! On the ark! Go, go, go!
God appeared to me and told me to build an ark.
God appeared to me and told me to build an ark.
God bless... Well, you. Okay.
God bless... Well, you. Okay.
God is the creator of the Heavens and the Earth.
God is the creator of the Heavens and the Earth.
God told you to build an ark? Yes.
God told you to build an ark? Yes.
GOD: Go four wood. Get it?
GOD: Go four wood. Get it?
GOD: Until September 22, midday.
GOD: Until September 22, midday.
God? Does God know he's destroying our lives?
God? Does God know he's destroying our lives?
God? You talk to God?
God? You talk to God?
God.
God.
Going over Todd's Bill?
Going over Todd's Bill?
Good boy.
Good boy.
Good God!
Good God!
Good job.
Good job.
Good Morning
Good Morning
Good Morning
Good Morning
Good morning kitty Keep moving... break it up
Good morning kitty Keep moving... break it up
Good morning, chief!
Good morning, chief!
Good morning, chief. Good morning, Rita.
Good morning, chief. Good morning, Rita.
Good Morning, how are you?
Good Morning, how are you?
Good morning, Rita.
Good morning, Rita.
Good morning.
Good morning.
Good. I'm introducing the CINPLAN bill in 2 weeks. C SPAN is covering it live.
Good. I'm introducing the CINPLAN bill in 2 weeks. C SPAN is covering it live.
Good. Maybe this young stud can help me get these old mares on board.
Good. Maybe this young stud can help me get these old mares on board.
Goodbye, Evan.
Goodbye, Evan.
Got it.
Got it.
Got it. Pause. Come on, Evan, this is huge.
Got it. Pause. Come on, Evan, this is huge.
GPS: Huntsville, Virginia. Prestige Crest, four miles.
GPS: Huntsville, Virginia. Prestige Crest, four miles.
Gross!
Gross!
Guess what? this weekend we're going on a Hike ing trip
Guess what? this weekend we're going on a Hike ing trip
Guys, Dad's very proud of his new car.
Guys, Dad's very proud of his new car.
Guys, I can't let Long see me this way, okay?
Guys, I can't let Long see me this way, okay?
Guys, I'm fine. I'll be inside.
Guys, I'm fine. I'll be inside.
Guys! Guys!
Guys! Guys!
Guys! No, no! Get out! Get out! Oh, my hair!
Guys! No, no! Get out! Get out! Oh, my hair!
Ha, ha, ha!
Ha, ha, ha!
He is trying to get me fired!
He is trying to get me fired!
He likes a morning latte with a cruller, a decaf espresso after lunch,
He likes a morning latte with a cruller, a decaf espresso after lunch,
He met a dog. What do you think he prayed for?
He met a dog. What do you think he prayed for?
He prayed for good visibility, good weather on the hiking trip tomorrow.
He prayed for good visibility, good weather on the hiking trip tomorrow.
He said there was going to be a flood and that I should be prepared.
He said there was going to be a flood and that I should be prepared.
He thought it would be funny.
He thought it would be funny.
He's exhausted from reading that bill. I got woozy from just carrying it.
He's exhausted from reading that bill. I got woozy from just carrying it.
He's filling the boat with two of every kind of animal.
He's filling the boat with two of every kind of animal.
He's going to have to introduce it to the committee immediately.
He's going to have to introduce it to the committee immediately.
He's thirsty. No, no, no.
He's thirsty. No, no, no.
Heaven's Evan, The Weirdo with a Beardo.
Heaven's Evan, The Weirdo with a Beardo.
Hello, Congressman. Mind if I park my boat here for a little while?
Hello, Congressman. Mind if I park my boat here for a little while?
Hello, I am Evan...
Hello, I am Evan...
Hello, there. Hi.
Hello, there. Hi.
Hello!
Hello!
Hello.
Hello.
Here they are!
Here they are!
Here we go. I got it. Keep it... That's it!
Here we go. I got it. Keep it... That's it!
Here's a look back at his run for office.
Here's a look back at his run for office.
Hey dad look! 2 doves that's supose to be good luck
Hey dad look! 2 doves that's supose to be good luck
Hey, Ahab! This is it?
Hey, Ahab! This is it?
Hey, anybody home?
Hey, anybody home?
Hey, Dad, an iguana can stay underwater for 28 minutes.
Hey, Dad, an iguana can stay underwater for 28 minutes.
Hey, Dad, he's back!
Hey, Dad, he's back!
Hey, Dad, I think there are more animals than yesterday.
Hey, Dad, I think there are more animals than yesterday.
Hey, fleabag, out of the way.
Hey, fleabag, out of the way.
Hey, guys, what's the point?
Hey, guys, what's the point?
Hey, guys, why the long faces? We're off on a new adventure!
Hey, guys, why the long faces? We're off on a new adventure!
Hey, hey, hey, good morning.
Hey, hey, hey, good morning.
Hey, hon, save me one, okay? Okay.
Hey, hon, save me one, okay? Okay.
Hey, I am proud of my new car. Look, I'm a politician now.
Hey, I am proud of my new car. Look, I'm a politician now.
Hey, I wrote the thing and I have a few questions.
Hey, I wrote the thing and I have a few questions.
Hey, I'm the one who has to read this thing!
Hey, I'm the one who has to read this thing!
Hey, keep it down, you guys! Okay?
Hey, keep it down, you guys! Okay?
Hey, Long came through with that seat on the House Resource Committee.
Hey, Long came through with that seat on the House Resource Committee.
Hey, Marty, what's up?
Hey, Marty, what's up?
Hey, Mom. John Lennon, good to see you again.
Hey, Mom. John Lennon, good to see you again.
Hey, putty tat.
Hey, putty tat.
Hey, who has opposable thumbs? Anybody?
Hey, who has opposable thumbs? Anybody?
Hey! A little help?
Hey! A little help?
Hey! Hey! Hey! No. Okay.
Hey! Hey! Hey! No. Okay.
Hey! When you're on my lawn keep it in your pot!
Hey! When you're on my lawn keep it in your pot!
Hey. Did you hear? Junior cosponsor of a bill.
Hey. Did you hear? Junior cosponsor of a bill.
Hey. Hey.
Hey. Hey.
Hi.
Hi.
His name is Evan Baxter, but now he goes by New York's Noah,
His name is Evan Baxter, but now he goes by New York's Noah,
Hmm?
Hmm?
Hmm?
Hmm?
Home, Canada. One or the other.
Home, Canada. One or the other.
Honey, come here. Sweetheart, be careful. Come here.
Honey, come here. Sweetheart, be careful. Come here.
Honey, did I miss something? How long have you been growing that?
Honey, did I miss something? How long have you been growing that?
Honey, I think you're blocking my photo.
Honey, I think you're blocking my photo.
Honey, the clouds are moving away.
Honey, the clouds are moving away.
Honey, the clouds are moving away.
Honey, the clouds are moving away.
Honey, you don't need to pray for that to happen. I will make that happen.
Honey, you don't need to pray for that to happen. I will make that happen.
Honey!
Honey!
Honey?
Honey?
Honey?
Honey?
Honey. We have to go. They're going to destroy the boat.
Honey. We have to go. They're going to destroy the boat.
How about a little help here?
How about a little help here?
How are we gonna do this?
How are we gonna do this?
How did you get in here? I'm calling the cops.
How did you get in here? I'm calling the cops.
How do I stand up with a piece of wood? Here we go.
How do I stand up with a piece of wood? Here we go.
How do we change the world?
How do we change the world?
How does it work?
How does it work?
How'd you know that?
How'd you know that?
Hurray... Yeeaa... high five it We're going on a hiking trip
Hurray... Yeeaa... high five it We're going on a hiking trip
I agree. I think we should get on the ark also.
I agree. I think we should get on the ark also.
I am a pack man, sir.
I am a pack man, sir.
I am a U.S. Congressman!
I am a U.S. Congressman!
I am going through adult puberty!
I am going through adult puberty!
I am going to be so pissed.
I am going to be so pissed.
I am happy, successful, powerful, handsome, happy.
I am happy, successful, powerful, handsome, happy.
I am successful, I'm powerful, I'm handsome, I'm happy.
I am successful, I'm powerful, I'm handsome, I'm happy.
I am successful. I am powerful. I am handsome.
I am successful. I am powerful. I am handsome.
I am, i thought about what you said and you're right, i need to get my head on straight
I am, i thought about what you said and you're right, i need to get my head on straight
I can do this. Help!
I can do this. Help!
I can make any sort of movement, and they will not get off!
I can make any sort of movement, and they will not get off!
I can't do that.
I can't do that.
I can't shave, Marty. When I shave, it grows back out.
I can't shave, Marty. When I shave, it grows back out.
I couldn't agree more.
I couldn't agree more.
I didn't do that, did I?
I didn't do that, did I?
I do because I love you.
I do because I love you.
I don't know what's going on, or what you're going through,
I don't know what's going on, or what you're going through,
I don't know. Maybe I'll build a boat.
I don't know. Maybe I'll build a boat.
I don't see him.
I don't see him.
I don't think you know the new kid Eugene Tennanbaum. I found him at G.W.
I don't think you know the new kid Eugene Tennanbaum. I found him at G.W.
I feel like that old Indian in front of all the garbage.
I feel like that old Indian in front of all the garbage.
I got a boo boo! I got a boo boo! I got a boo boo!
I got a boo boo! I got a boo boo! I got a boo boo!
I got a delivery for Evan Baxter!
I got a delivery for Evan Baxter!
I have a draft of your support letter.
I have a draft of your support letter.
I have to do the new house dance.
I have to do the new house dance.
I invite you to join myself and my cosponsors, Congressman Dodd,
I invite you to join myself and my cosponsors, Congressman Dodd,
I just deliver, guy, huh? You got a complaint, call the number!
I just deliver, guy, huh? You got a complaint, call the number!
I just wanted to say that I think Joan makes a good point,
I just wanted to say that I think Joan makes a good point,
I just wanted to say that I think Joan makes a good point,
I just wanted to say that I think Joan makes a good point,
I know this sounds crazy.
I know this sounds crazy.
I know, sweetie!
I know, sweetie!
I know! I know. Whatever you do, you do because you love me!
I know! I know. Whatever you do, you do because you love me!
I like the alpaca. He spits.
I like the alpaca. He spits.
I love that story, Noah and the Ark.
I love that story, Noah and the Ark.
I love you. Thank you.
I love you. Thank you.
I mean, I picked it out, but you created matter and everything, so...
I mean, I picked it out, but you created matter and everything, so...
I mean, we should hang out socially. I just got a ping pong table.
I mean, we should hang out socially. I just got a ping pong table.
I might need security. Thank you.
I might need security. Thank you.
I need to finish the ark!
I need to finish the ark!
I need to settle into my house. I need to make a good impression at work.
I need to settle into my house. I need to make a good impression at work.
I need your face back. I need you back.
I need your face back. I need you back.
I never thought this...
I never thought this...
I now issue a new commandment,
I now issue a new commandment,
I prayed we would become closer as a family.
I prayed we would become closer as a family.
I promised my kids... Eugene.
I promised my kids... Eugene.
I really think I need to do this.
I really think I need to do this.
I see where you're going with this, Congressman. Good work!
I see where you're going with this, Congressman. Good work!
I see you got my housewarming gift.
I see you got my housewarming gift.
I set the alarm for 7:00.
I set the alarm for 7:00.
I smelled a rat the second we got that office.
I smelled a rat the second we got that office.
I think they want me to save them!
I think they want me to save them!
I think we can walk from here.
I think we can walk from here.
I think we should get on the ark.
I think we should get on the ark.
I want you to build an ark.
I want you to build an ark.
I wanted you to see the original design.
I wanted you to see the original design.
I'd rather you didn't.
I'd rather you didn't.
I'll be right back.
I'll be right back.
I'll get the door!
I'll get the door!
I'll tell you one thing, these birds had a nice big meal before they flew in here.
I'll tell you one thing, these birds had a nice big meal before they flew in here.
I'll tell you what. You build it, I'll fill it.
I'll tell you what. You build it, I'll fill it.
I'll tell you.
I'll tell you.
I'm afraid I can't do that, sir.
I'm afraid I can't do that, sir.
I'm bringing you into my land use bill
I'm bringing you into my land use bill
I'm building a boat. You're building a boat?
I'm building a boat. You're building a boat?
I'm building an ark.
I'm building an ark.
I'm considered a bit of a storyteller myself.
I'm considered a bit of a storyteller myself.
I'm freaking out, because of the future just listen you just got a new job ...
I'm freaking out, because of the future just listen you just got a new job ...
I'm giving you one last chance. Repent.
I'm giving you one last chance. Repent.
I'm God.
I'm God.
I'm gonna give you one last chance. Take down this boat.
I'm gonna give you one last chance. Take down this boat.
I'm gonna take them to my mother's. Evan, I think you need help.
I'm gonna take them to my mother's. Evan, I think you need help.
I'm good.
I'm good.
I'm in the public eye, and as you know, when you are in the public eye,
I'm in the public eye, and as you know, when you are in the public eye,
I'm just stressed and you are gone
I'm just stressed and you are gone
I'm just stressed and you are gone
I'm just stressed and you are gone
I'm Marty Stringer. I'm Congressman Baxter's chief of staff.
I'm Marty Stringer. I'm Congressman Baxter's chief of staff.
I'm not doing this. It's insane!
I'm not doing this. It's insane!
I'm not freaked out, why would i be freaked out?
I'm not freaked out, why would i be freaked out?
I'm not gonna turn you in to the principal. Mostly because I am the principal.
I'm not gonna turn you in to the principal. Mostly because I am the principal.
I'm personally going with whatever Congressman Baxter decides,
I'm personally going with whatever Congressman Baxter decides,
I'm...
I'm...
I've been to church! And that does not sound like God to me.
I've been to church! And that does not sound like God to me.
I've got a letter of intent here about Congressman Long's bill.
I've got a letter of intent here about Congressman Long's bill.
I've seen this circus act before!
I've seen this circus act before!
If Congressman Long wants to pass it this quarter,
If Congressman Long wants to pass it this quarter,
If Evan got shot in the head, you're the first suspect.
If Evan got shot in the head, you're the first suspect.
If he gets any crazier, we may end up in the White House.
If he gets any crazier, we may end up in the White House.
If he's not in that meeting, we're all out of a job.
If he's not in that meeting, we're all out of a job.
If it hadn't been for the ark, my family, the neighbors...
If it hadn't been for the ark, my family, the neighbors...
If it were me, I would take all the help I could get.
If it were me, I would take all the help I could get.
If someone prayed for their family to be closer,
If someone prayed for their family to be closer,
If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience?
If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience?
If that comes out your front,
If that comes out your front,
If the ark isn't finished by then, you will be.
If the ark isn't finished by then, you will be.
If they pray for courage, does God give them courage,
If they pray for courage, does God give them courage,
If this flood really does happen, Evan help us.
If this flood really does happen, Evan help us.
If we give him water, he's just going to come back.
If we give him water, he's just going to come back.
If we're going to stop this thing, you need to get down to Capitol Hill now!
If we're going to stop this thing, you need to get down to Capitol Hill now!
In a nutshell, he is disgusting. Case in point.
In a nutshell, he is disgusting. Case in point.
In his support of this bill. Congressman, let me warn you,
In his support of this bill. Congressman, let me warn you,
Is it too much to ask for a little precipitation?
Is it too much to ask for a little precipitation?
Is really not part of my plans here.
Is really not part of my plans here.
Is that a llama with a hammer?
Is that a llama with a hammer?
Is that it?
Is that it?
Is that rain? It's raining.
Is that rain? It's raining.
Is that when it's going to happen? September 22, midday?
Is that when it's going to happen? September 22, midday?
Is this curb appeal or what?
Is this curb appeal or what?
Is this, like, a midlife crisis?
Is this, like, a midlife crisis?
It chooses to run with a pack.
It chooses to run with a pack.
It doesn't work!
It doesn't work!
It kind of stopped raining.
It kind of stopped raining.
It might be something fun for the family.
It might be something fun for the family.
It was clear cut from this valley to make room for all those houses.
It was clear cut from this valley to make room for all those houses.
It was just a weird ride in.
It was just a weird ride in.
It was the kids.
It was the kids.
It would appear Evan Baxter was right about the rain,
It would appear Evan Baxter was right about the rain,
It'd be great in case it floods or something.
It'd be great in case it floods or something.
It'd probably be you.
It'd probably be you.
It's 200, 300 years old.
It's 200, 300 years old.
It's a disaster. I don't know how to build something like this.
It's a disaster. I don't know how to build something like this.
It's a pretty big job.
It's a pretty big job.
It's a wife thing, sir.
It's a wife thing, sir.
It's good to see you! Your hair looks great. It's very regal. Man, I love your hair!
It's good to see you! Your hair looks great. It's very regal. Man, I love your hair!
It's just we're going to miss our friends.
It's just we're going to miss our friends.
It's named after him. It's the lake! It's the lake!
It's named after him. It's the lake! It's the lake!
It's not that bad!
It's not that bad!
It's not time yet. Go on. Go on.
It's not time yet. Go on. Go on.
It's not? No.
It's not? No.
It's September 22, and we're all still here.
It's September 22, and we're all still here.
It's their instinct.
It's their instinct.
It's time.
It's time.
It's world changing time!
It's world changing time!
Jerks.
Jerks.
Joan, please, you gotta believe me.
Joan, please, you gotta believe me.
Joan, please. I'm not doing this. It's not me. It's him.
Joan, please. I'm not doing this. It's not me. It's him.
JOAN: Evan!
JOAN: Evan!
JOAN: Honey, be careful! EVAN: Watch it!
JOAN: Honey, be careful! EVAN: Watch it!
JOAN: Honey? You okay? You need something?
JOAN: Honey? You okay? You need something?
JOAN: Never heard of them.
JOAN: Never heard of them.
JOAN: No, please, no.
JOAN: No, please, no.
JOAN: Oh, my gosh.
JOAN: Oh, my gosh.
JOAN: Packing, so it would really help me out if you would...
JOAN: Packing, so it would really help me out if you would...
JOAN: What?
JOAN: What?
Joan!
Joan!
Joan? I know you probably saw what happened, but I can explain.
Joan? I know you probably saw what happened, but I can explain.
JON: Guess this comes as no surprise to those who remember his campaign promise,
JON: Guess this comes as no surprise to those who remember his campaign promise,
JORDAN: How's Buster doing?
JORDAN: How's Buster doing?
JORDAN: That's our house?
JORDAN: That's our house?
JORDAN: This is perfect.
JORDAN: This is perfect.
Just a minute. No, no, no, no. Dirty, dirty, dirty! Big one!
Just a minute. No, no, no, no. Dirty, dirty, dirty! Big one!
Just a walking petri dish, that dog.
Just a walking petri dish, that dog.
Just as cute as a button. Not bad for such an ugly woman. Weighed in at...
Just as cute as a button. Not bad for such an ugly woman. Weighed in at...
Just go home, get some rest and start on that ark. You hear me?
Just go home, get some rest and start on that ark. You hear me?
Just hanging out with some old friends.
Just hanging out with some old friends.
Just like Noah and his family. Everybody entered the ark side by side.
Just like Noah and his family. Everybody entered the ark side by side.
Just open the door!
Just open the door!
Just trying to spice up the love life.
Just trying to spice up the love life.
Just wanted to say thank you for everything.
Just wanted to say thank you for everything.
Just, please don't make us do the dance anymore.
Just, please don't make us do the dance anymore.
Keeping it fresh. Keeping it real.
Keeping it fresh. Keeping it real.
Later, gator.
Later, gator.
Leg power!
Leg power!
Let me ask you something.
Let me ask you something.
Let me make you see what I'm talking about.
Let me make you see what I'm talking about.
Let's do the dance.
Let's do the dance.
Let's finish this sucker.
Let's finish this sucker.
Let's get this bill passed, shall we, Congressman?
Let's get this bill passed, shall we, Congressman?
Let's just say that whatever I do,
Let's just say that whatever I do,
Let's see if we can get some congressmen to follow you.
Let's see if we can get some congressmen to follow you.
Leverage it up! Leverage. Okay.
Leverage it up! Leverage. Okay.
Like skipping important building code checkpoints.
Like skipping important building code checkpoints.
Like that?
Like that?
Like the one you're sending with your bill?
Like the one you're sending with your bill?
Listen to me! The time has come!
Listen to me! The time has come!
Listen! Listen!
Listen! Listen!
Long just called. He's on his way with the powers that be. Who are they, Gene? Talk.
Long just called. He's on his way with the powers that be. Who are they, Gene? Talk.
LONG: All those in favor of the Public Land Act, please signify by saying, Aye.
LONG: All those in favor of the Public Land Act, please signify by saying, Aye.
LONG: And God is talking back?
LONG: And God is talking back?
LONG: At its heart, this bill gives private citizens access
LONG: At its heart, this bill gives private citizens access
LONG: Ladies and gentlemen! Please! These animals are trained!
LONG: Ladies and gentlemen! Please! These animals are trained!
Long's been sitting on it for ages...
Long's been sitting on it for ages...
Look over to the right. That is your new home.
Look over to the right. That is your new home.
Look, you got to cover for me. I don't want anybody to see...
Look, you got to cover for me. I don't want anybody to see...
Looks like the drought's finally over. Good news, eh, Congressman?
Looks like the drought's finally over. Good news, eh, Congressman?
Lucky guess, Baxter. Lucky guess.
Lucky guess, Baxter. Lucky guess.
Lucky guess.
Lucky guess.
Make thee an ark of gopher wood...
Make thee an ark of gopher wood...
MAN 1: As you can see behind me, New York Noah's prediction came true.
MAN 1: As you can see behind me, New York Noah's prediction came true.
MAN 1: Good morning, Congressman Baxter. Hello.
MAN 1: Good morning, Congressman Baxter. Hello.
MAN 1: Ladies and gentlemen, you don't have to go home.
MAN 1: Ladies and gentlemen, you don't have to go home.
MAN 2: Good morning, Congressman Baxter. Good morning.
MAN 2: Good morning, Congressman Baxter. Good morning.
MAN 2: Of course now, the question is, how will these animals be returned
MAN 2: Of course now, the question is, how will these animals be returned
MAN 2: We're not gonna make it!
MAN 2: We're not gonna make it!
MAN 2: We're wrapped. We love you. Thank you.
MAN 2: We're wrapped. We love you. Thank you.
MAN OVER TV: There's been a flood at Prestige Crest
MAN OVER TV: There's been a flood at Prestige Crest
Man, if I get the bird flu, he is paying for my medical bills!
Man, if I get the bird flu, he is paying for my medical bills!
MAN: Careful!
MAN: Careful!
MAN: Get down, you fool!
MAN: Get down, you fool!
MAN: Hey, Baxter! Kiss your ark goodbye!
MAN: Hey, Baxter! Kiss your ark goodbye!
MAN: House Resources Committee is now in order.
MAN: House Resources Committee is now in order.
MAN: Turn this thing around!
MAN: Turn this thing around!
Marty, I told you, I will let you know as soon as...
Marty, I told you, I will let you know as soon as...
Marty, will you comment on Congressman Baxter's change of appearance?
Marty, will you comment on Congressman Baxter's change of appearance?
Marty, you are not the vice congressman. I am the legislative...
Marty, you are not the vice congressman. I am the legislative...
MARTY: Good morning.
MARTY: Good morning.
MARTY: Those are rock star plates, man. You can park anywhere.
MARTY: Those are rock star plates, man. You can park anywhere.
MARTY: You're building something?
MARTY: You're building something?
MARTY: You're right on time.
MARTY: You're right on time.
Maybe he meant a flood of knowledge or emotion or awareness.
Maybe he meant a flood of knowledge or emotion or awareness.
Me either.
Me either.
Me, too. But can we keep some of the animals?
Me, too. But can we keep some of the animals?
Me? I don't know. Praying just...
Me? I don't know. Praying just...
Might I ask who told you?
Might I ask who told you?
Mmm, mmm, mmm.
Mmm, mmm, mmm.
Mom, can we go upstairs? JOAN: Yep.
Mom, can we go upstairs? JOAN: Yep.
Mother's Carroll Ann Parker. Father, Eugene Evan Baxter.
Mother's Carroll Ann Parker. Father, Eugene Evan Baxter.
Mr. Baxter, could you give us some direction on these kitchen cabinets?
Mr. Baxter, could you give us some direction on these kitchen cabinets?
Must have the wrong address.
Must have the wrong address.
My hair grows longer every day. This robe... God sent me the robe.
My hair grows longer every day. This robe... God sent me the robe.
My husband... Have you heard of New York's Noah?
My husband... Have you heard of New York's Noah?
Needs to dominate creatures
Needs to dominate creatures
Never heard of it. Gene, here, now. Rita, why didn't you tell me about this?
Never heard of it. Gene, here, now. Rita, why didn't you tell me about this?
Nice sound to that. I like it.
Nice sound to that. I like it.
Nice to meet you, Mr. Congressman. Why do you have raw beef hands?
Nice to meet you, Mr. Congressman. Why do you have raw beef hands?
No, Captain Ahab! Your time has come!
No, Captain Ahab! Your time has come!
No, I can't do that. Nope, nope, nope. Not gonna happen.
No, I can't do that. Nope, nope, nope. Not gonna happen.
No, I heard you, Evan. The whole world heard you.
No, I heard you, Evan. The whole world heard you.
No, I wasn't.
No, I wasn't.
No, it's pine and maple.
No, it's pine and maple.
No, no, I didn't.
No, no, I didn't.
No, no, no. Oh, my gosh!
No, no, no. Oh, my gosh!
No, no! Get away, get away! Go!
No, no! Get away, get away! Go!
No, no. No, this isn't right.
No, no. No, this isn't right.
No, no. No. That's hilarious, though.
No, no. No. That's hilarious, though.
No, nothing. Just dropped something.
No, nothing. Just dropped something.
No, sir.
No, sir.
No, sir.
No, sir.
No, you don't! There we go.
No, you don't! There we go.
No!
No!
No! Hey! Listen! We are 416, not 614!
No! Hey! Listen! We are 416, not 614!
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No. It's 6:14.
No. It's 6:14.
No. It's a long story.
No. It's a long story.
No. No.
No. No.
No. Okay. No, no. No. No, no. No.
No. Okay. No, no. No. No, no. No.
No. Please! You don't understand!
No. Please! You don't understand!
No. They said that couldn't happen.
No. They said that couldn't happen.
No. You can't do that. Not looking like that. You have to go shave!
No. You can't do that. Not looking like that. You have to go shave!
Nobody voted for you. If Evan gets shot in the head, you do not automatically...
Nobody voted for you. If Evan gets shot in the head, you do not automatically...
Not as well as I'd like.
Not as well as I'd like.
Not bad for a freshman dorm room, huh?
Not bad for a freshman dorm room, huh?
Not going to happen.
Not going to happen.
Not hungry.
Not hungry.
Not in front of all those people. Don't say it. Don't say it.
Not in front of all those people. Don't say it. Don't say it.
Not now, Noah!
Not now, Noah!
Nothing. Just sort of a weird ride in.
Nothing. Just sort of a weird ride in.
Notice how the mountains line up east to west.
Notice how the mountains line up east to west.
Now, the locals fought this thing for years.
Now, the locals fought this thing for years.
Now, you have to come to a decision.
Now, you have to come to a decision.
O.K. God warned noah about the great flood was coming...
O.K. God warned noah about the great flood was coming...
Obviously, the stresses of this office have proven too much for you.
Obviously, the stresses of this office have proven too much for you.
Of course they are. I get it. You know anything about animals, son?
Of course they are. I get it. You know anything about animals, son?
Of course. Voodoo clock speaks again.
Of course. Voodoo clock speaks again.
Of the Baxters' new and exciting life.
Of the Baxters' new and exciting life.
Of the United States of America
Of the United States of America
Officer! Officer! Officer! Carjacker! Carjacker in the car! Carjacker in the car!
Officer! Officer! Officer! Carjacker! Carjacker in the car! Carjacker in the car!
Oh no honey, i've known you 20 years... ...i know your stressed
Oh no honey, i've known you 20 years... ...i know your stressed
Oh, and another thing, he wants you to read it today.
Oh, and another thing, he wants you to read it today.
Oh, and you might need this.
Oh, and you might need this.
Oh, come on, son. I hand you your first cosponsor ship of a bill,
Oh, come on, son. I hand you your first cosponsor ship of a bill,
Oh, come on. Yesterday we're in the basement.
Oh, come on. Yesterday we're in the basement.
Oh, good. The doctor's here.
Oh, good. The doctor's here.
Oh, I'm an idiot.
Oh, I'm an idiot.
Oh, it was great. Yes. Thank you, sir.
Oh, it was great. Yes. Thank you, sir.
Oh, look, there he is.
Oh, look, there he is.
Oh, man. Okay, that's good.
Oh, man. Okay, that's good.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God. This is happening. This is really happening.
Oh, my God. This is happening. This is really happening.
Oh, no, no, no, no, get him away!
Oh, no, no, no, no, get him away!
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, no. Hey, would anyone mind if I close the window?
Oh, no. Hey, would anyone mind if I close the window?
Oh, no. I really didn't expect this.
Oh, no. I really didn't expect this.
Oh, no. No need! Look! Look. There's one right there. Right there.
Oh, no. No need! Look! Look. There's one right there. Right there.
Oh, these
Oh, these
Oh, this is nice! This is really nice!
Oh, this is nice! This is really nice!
Oh, this is so cool.
Oh, this is so cool.
Oh, you'll be impressed.
Oh, you'll be impressed.
Oh. Oh. Congressman Long. Yes. Oh, I'm so sorry about...
Oh. Oh. Congressman Long. Yes. Oh, I'm so sorry about...
Oh...
Oh...
Ohh... ohh... hey! Thank's for sharing
Ohh... ohh... hey! Thank's for sharing
Okay, Eugene, talk.
Okay, Eugene, talk.
Okay, Evan, who do you know? What do you mean?
Okay, Evan, who do you know? What do you mean?
Okay, every other Sunday.
Okay, every other Sunday.
Okay, guys. A little bit more.
Okay, guys. A little bit more.
Okay, guys. Watch it. Watch it. Coming through. Watch your back.
Okay, guys. Watch it. Watch it. Coming through. Watch your back.
Okay, it's between your maple and your old growth Brazilian cherry.
Okay, it's between your maple and your old growth Brazilian cherry.
Okay, Ry, let's clean all this stuff up. Dad's got work to do.
Okay, Ry, let's clean all this stuff up. Dad's got work to do.
Okay, Ryan, this is why we can't keep him.
Okay, Ryan, this is why we can't keep him.
Okay, someone's had enough Animal Planet for one lifetime.
Okay, someone's had enough Animal Planet for one lifetime.
Okay, that's great. It's longer.
Okay, that's great. It's longer.
Okay, well, thanks for clarifying.
Okay, well, thanks for clarifying.
Okay, yeah, to answer any questions you may have,
Okay, yeah, to answer any questions you may have,
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay. All right.
Okay. All right.
Okay. All right. You want me to wear the robe? I'll wear the robe.
Okay. All right. You want me to wear the robe? I'll wear the robe.
Okay. Dylan, go with them. Please?
Okay. Dylan, go with them. Please?
Okay. No.
Okay. No.
Okay. Oh, no, no, no.
Okay. Oh, no, no, no.
Okay. Okay.
Okay. Okay.
Okay. That's it. I'm hanging up now.
Okay. That's it. I'm hanging up now.
Okay. Time's up! We're coming in!
Okay. Time's up! We're coming in!
Okay. You know what? This conversation is a little thing I like to call over!
Okay. You know what? This conversation is a little thing I like to call over!
On the boat, sir.
On the boat, sir.
One act of random kindness at a time.
One act of random kindness at a time.
One act of random kindness.
One act of random kindness.
One minute!
One minute!
One, two, three!
One, two, three!
Open the door?
Open the door?
Or does he give them opportunities to be courageous?
Or does he give them opportunities to be courageous?
Or does he give them opportunities to love each other?
Or does he give them opportunities to love each other?
Or how the congressman is getting them to do it,
Or how the congressman is getting them to do it,
Or they'll take it down and arrest you.
Or they'll take it down and arrest you.
Or you will be forcibly removed.
Or you will be forcibly removed.
Otherwise, it's impossible!
Otherwise, it's impossible!
Ouch, that hurts.
Ouch, that hurts.
Ow!
Ow!
Pending investigation of Congressman Long for profiteering...
Pending investigation of Congressman Long for profiteering...
People want to change the world, don't know how to begin.
People want to change the world, don't know how to begin.
People! The flood is imminent!
People! The flood is imminent!
Piece de resistance.
Piece de resistance.
Play nice. Play nice.
Play nice. Play nice.
Please have the congressman removed.
Please have the congressman removed.
Please help me change the world.
Please help me change the world.
Please! Everyone! On the ark!
Please! Everyone! On the ark!
Poor Buster!
Poor Buster!
Really? What did you pray about?
Really? What did you pray about?
Repeat after me, We are hamsters!
Repeat after me, We are hamsters!
REPORTER: Congressman!
REPORTER: Congressman!
Right on through Tuesday
Right on through Tuesday
Right! Yeah. But I can't. It doesn't work.
Right! Yeah. But I can't. It doesn't work.
Right. So?
Right. So?
Rita, any sign of him?
Rita, any sign of him?
Rita, I think I have to do the dance.
Rita, I think I have to do the dance.
Rita, if Evan shows up... I'm sorry, sir. I'll be with you in just one...
Rita, if Evan shows up... I'm sorry, sir. I'll be with you in just one...
Rita, it's me.
Rita, it's me.
Rita, tell him what you know.
Rita, tell him what you know.
Rita, this is no time for jokes. I'm not kidding.
Rita, this is no time for jokes. I'm not kidding.
RITA: Are you ready, sir?
RITA: Are you ready, sir?
RITA: Hate to break up your little weenie roast.
RITA: Hate to break up your little weenie roast.
RITA: Why couldn't the man just buy a Corvette?
RITA: Why couldn't the man just buy a Corvette?
Rough week? JORDAN: You look really funny.
Rough week? JORDAN: You look really funny.
Ryan, no, don't do...
Ryan, no, don't do...
RYAN: Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Go. Go. Go.
RYAN: Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Go. Go. Go.
RYAN: Dad, look!
RYAN: Dad, look!
RYAN: Dad, this is really weird.
RYAN: Dad, this is really weird.
RYAN: Dad, you're busted.
RYAN: Dad, you're busted.
RYAN: He can't keep up.
RYAN: He can't keep up.
RYAN: I get first dibs!
RYAN: I get first dibs!
RYAN: This is awesome! JORDAN: This is so cool.
RYAN: This is awesome! JORDAN: This is so cool.
RYAN: This is so totally awesome!
RYAN: This is so totally awesome!
RYAN: Whoa!
RYAN: Whoa!
Saving the animals, okay. I can roll with that. That's a good idea.
Saving the animals, okay. I can roll with that. That's a good idea.
Say ah.
Say ah.
See, if you had an ark, you'd have a place to put them all.
See, if you had an ark, you'd have a place to put them all.
See? I told you. And you owe me five bucks.
See? I told you. And you owe me five bucks.
September 22, midday.
September 22, midday.
September 22. That's the day of the flood.
September 22. That's the day of the flood.
Shake it off, Evan. It's over. The nutcase is gone.
Shake it off, Evan. It's over. The nutcase is gone.
Shake it off, shake it off! Shake it off, shake it off!
Shake it off, shake it off! Shake it off, shake it off!
She's a big Loggins and Messina fan.
She's a big Loggins and Messina fan.
She's right This is cracy
She's right This is cracy
Side by side.
Side by side.
Six pounds, 14 ounces.
Six pounds, 14 ounces.
So here's the skinny.
So here's the skinny.
So how about it? Feel like living on the edge?
So how about it? Feel like living on the edge?
So I had the stalker here do some research.
So I had the stalker here do some research.
So if I need to get a message out there, or get a congressman elected
So if I need to get a message out there, or get a congressman elected
So that's why the tools. And you are responsible for the wood?
So that's why the tools. And you are responsible for the wood?
So this dry, hot weather will continue.
So this dry, hot weather will continue.
So you can make us look stupid? 'Cause I go to church every Sunday.
So you can make us look stupid? 'Cause I go to church every Sunday.
So, for the last time, this is Evan Baxter for Eyewitness News. Good night.
So, for the last time, this is Evan Baxter for Eyewitness News. Good night.
So, God,
So, God,
So, how'd you like that office?
So, how'd you like that office?
So, I have come up with a little construction project for us this weekend.
So, I have come up with a little construction project for us this weekend.
So, tell me, Congressman, are you freaking out on me or what?
So, tell me, Congressman, are you freaking out on me or what?
So, why are you here?
So, why are you here?
So, you had nothing to do with the flood? Like where the ark landed exactly?
So, you had nothing to do with the flood? Like where the ark landed exactly?
So, you stand by and shake your pom poms while Long and his buddies get rich.
So, you stand by and shake your pom poms while Long and his buddies get rich.
So?
So?
Somebody is in a good mood
Somebody is in a good mood
Something tells me, if God got them here, he can probably get them home.
Something tells me, if God got them here, he can probably get them home.
Sort of a walking search engine. Watch this. How many stars on the flag in 1818?
Sort of a walking search engine. Watch this. How many stars on the flag in 1818?
Sounds like a plan. Are you all right?
Sounds like a plan. Are you all right?
Sounds like an opportunity.
Sounds like an opportunity.
Spending time with your family, making them very happy.
Spending time with your family, making them very happy.
Still expecting the big flood.
Still expecting the big flood.
Still to be collected, two giraffes, two elephants
Still to be collected, two giraffes, two elephants
Stop it! This is stupid!
Stop it! This is stupid!
Stop it. Come here.
Stop it. Come here.
Stop stammering, son. We all play hooky from time to time.
Stop stammering, son. We all play hooky from time to time.
Successful. Powerful. Handsome. Happy.
Successful. Powerful. Handsome. Happy.
Such a shame. You had possibilities.
Such a shame. You had possibilities.
Sure.
Sure.
Surprise, surprise, surprise. Gomer Pyle.
Surprise, surprise, surprise. Gomer Pyle.
SUSAN: And that's the news.
SUSAN: And that's the news.
Ta da! This, my friend, is a power office, to remind you of the mission!
Ta da! This, my friend, is a power office, to remind you of the mission!
Take it down.
Take it down.
Take the stuff to the car, guys. I'll be there in a minute.
Take the stuff to the car, guys. I'll be there in a minute.
Tell him, guys.
Tell him, guys.
Tell me what?
Tell me what?
Thank you for the new car and for the house.
Thank you for the new car and for the house.
Thank you honey O.K.
Thank you honey O.K.
Thank you, sir.
Thank you, sir.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thanks.
Thanks.
Thanks.
Thanks.
That happens when you shave! But then you shave again!
That happens when you shave! But then you shave again!
That it is stronger as part of a group.
That it is stronger as part of a group.
That man
That man
That the world doesn't have to end today.
That the world doesn't have to end today.
That was you? You sent those?
That was you? You sent those?
That would be a good day to have chicken. How about Mom's chicken? Huh?
That would be a good day to have chicken. How about Mom's chicken? Huh?
That'll be the day I'll be concerned. Thank you.
That'll be the day I'll be concerned. Thank you.
That's all right. I believe you. I just... I don't understand why you chose me.
That's all right. I believe you. I just... I don't understand why you chose me.
That's all you were asked to do, right?
That's all you were asked to do, right?
That's awful dancing! You better stop!
That's awful dancing! You better stop!
That's enough of the dance.
That's enough of the dance.
That's going to leave a brown patch!
That's going to leave a brown patch!
That's him.
That's him.
That's right!
That's right!
That's right!
That's right!
That's right. You going with the cherry? Cheery cherry!
That's right. You going with the cherry? Cheery cherry!
That's so there'd be lots of sunshine.
That's so there'd be lots of sunshine.
That's speculation. I don't know him personally...
That's speculation. I don't know him personally...
That's too much, Gene. Who else?
That's too much, Gene. Who else?
That's what I was told.
That's what I was told.
The Argentine lake duck has a penis as long as its body.
The Argentine lake duck has a penis as long as its body.
The ark was 300 qubics long and 50 qubics high
The ark was 300 qubics long and 50 qubics high
The ark? All right. Okay.
The ark? All right. Okay.
The beard, the robe.
The beard, the robe.
The bill would open up fringe areas of the national parks for development.
The bill would open up fringe areas of the national parks for development.
The boys need their father back, and I need my husband back.
The boys need their father back, and I need my husband back.
The Chair recognizes the congresswoman from Tennessee
The Chair recognizes the congresswoman from Tennessee
The Citizens' Integration of Public Lands Act.
The Citizens' Integration of Public Lands Act.
The Congressman would like for you
The Congressman would like for you
The day it rains and floods and Congressman Baxter takes a ride on his ark,
The day it rains and floods and Congressman Baxter takes a ride on his ark,
The flood.
The flood.
The guy who's building the ark.
The guy who's building the ark.
The hair. Are you on something? Is it a mega growth hormone? What?
The hair. Are you on something? Is it a mega growth hormone? What?
The hiking trip? Oh, right. Yeah. The hiking trip. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The hiking trip? Oh, right. Yeah. The hiking trip. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The house is great. I love it.
The house is great. I love it.
The lake, Long Lake.
The lake, Long Lake.
The lots. You bought the lots next door!
The lots. You bought the lots next door!
The name is stressed
The name is stressed
The pack kills the loner for the greater good of the community.
The pack kills the loner for the greater good of the community.
The student has become the teacher.
The student has become the teacher.
The way things go around here,
The way things go around here,
The whole weekend. Yes!
The whole weekend. Yes!
There are people who pay for it, and yes, those people want this bill to happen
There are people who pay for it, and yes, those people want this bill to happen
There he is! The head honcho. The big kahuna.
There he is! The head honcho. The big kahuna.
There it is! It's happening! It's happening! It's raining!
There it is! It's happening! It's happening! It's raining!
There they are!
There they are!
There we go. Okay.
There we go. Okay.
There's no way the five of us can finish on time.
There's no way the five of us can finish on time.
There's something else. Something's going to happen. I can feel it.
There's something else. Something's going to happen. I can feel it.
These animals are not trained.
These animals are not trained.
They all have committee chairs because they all run with the pack.
They all have committee chairs because they all run with the pack.
They are stinky. They are smelly. They get hair all over the place.
They are stinky. They are smelly. They get hair all over the place.
They are trained
They are trained
They get a little thing called the mange.
They get a little thing called the mange.
They like a more positive message.
They like a more positive message.
They love it when God gets angry.
They love it when God gets angry.
They said Long and his developer buddies were cutting corners,
They said Long and his developer buddies were cutting corners,
They think it's about God's wrath and anger.
They think it's about God's wrath and anger.
They're getting to much sugar in they're blood
They're getting to much sugar in they're blood
This has been the hottest, driest summer on record
This has been the hottest, driest summer on record
This is a court order approving the demolition of this boat!
This is a court order approving the demolition of this boat!
This is about development, short and simple.
This is about development, short and simple.
This is all temporary. Why did you bring me down here?
This is all temporary. Why did you bring me down here?
This is Ed Carson coming to you live from New York Noah's construction site,
This is Ed Carson coming to you live from New York Noah's construction site,
This is Evan Baxter.
This is Evan Baxter.
This is our house?
This is our house?
This is Regina Sparks reporting for...
This is Regina Sparks reporting for...
This is Rita Daniels, his executive assistant.
This is Rita Daniels, his executive assistant.
This is too nice. There's something crooked going on.
This is too nice. There's something crooked going on.
This is where you live, son. This is Prestige Crest.
This is where you live, son. This is Prestige Crest.
This meeting will come to order.
This meeting will come to order.
Those environmentalists got so up in arms
Those environmentalists got so up in arms
Thou shalt do the dance.
Thou shalt do the dance.
Three hundred years. Three hundred.
Three hundred years. Three hundred.
Time to wash up, you guys.
Time to wash up, you guys.
To junior cosponsor this bill that he's introducing.
To junior cosponsor this bill that he's introducing.
To lands they technically already own.
To lands they technically already own.
To make good on a lofty campaign promise.
To make good on a lofty campaign promise.
Today, look at this place. It's like the Emerald City!
Today, look at this place. It's like the Emerald City!
Top of the food chain.
Top of the food chain.
Turn them for a quick profit? Build them out on spec?
Turn them for a quick profit? Build them out on spec?
Two can play this game.
Two can play this game.
Two minutes!
Two minutes!
Uh huh.
Uh huh.
Uh huh. JOAN: I don't remember it being this big in the brochure.
Uh huh. JOAN: I don't remember it being this big in the brochure.
Until then, there is a lot to be done here on Capitol Hill.
Until then, there is a lot to be done here on Capitol Hill.
Very good.
Very good.
Very impressive. A little freaky, but I like this kid.
Very impressive. A little freaky, but I like this kid.
Wait a minute. Let me finish my sun salutation.
Wait a minute. Let me finish my sun salutation.
Wait a second.
Wait a second.
Watch your step! Up the ramp, everybody!
Watch your step! Up the ramp, everybody!
We could take the boat, go sailing on the lake.
We could take the boat, go sailing on the lake.
We have a fancy name for it in this century, it's called pita.
We have a fancy name for it in this century, it's called pita.
We have to prepare ourselves!
We have to prepare ourselves!
We left everything behind to come here.
We left everything behind to come here.
We like you better as the crazy guy.
We like you better as the crazy guy.
We lost a huge project last year because of the red headed woodpecker.
We lost a huge project last year because of the red headed woodpecker.
We, however, are not. You have five seconds.
We, however, are not. You have five seconds.
We'll get to the questions later. So, you with us?
We'll get to the questions later. So, you with us?
We're doing the dance. JORDAN: Dylan, come on. Do the dance.
We're doing the dance. JORDAN: Dylan, come on. Do the dance.
We're gonna have a rightess hiking trip
We're gonna have a rightess hiking trip
We're gonna need a bigger boat. Stay here with the kids.
We're gonna need a bigger boat. Stay here with the kids.
We're not going, are we?
We're not going, are we?
We're talking about an ark, right? I mean, an ark?
We're talking about an ark, right? I mean, an ark?
We've only been walking for, like, five minutes, Dad.
We've only been walking for, like, five minutes, Dad.
Weird how?
Weird how?
Well today must be my lucky day
Well today must be my lucky day
Well, five on, five off. Life is about balance, right?
Well, five on, five off. Life is about balance, right?
Well, I can't do it today.
Well, I can't do it today.
Well, I got to run. A lot of people to serve. Enjoy.
Well, I got to run. A lot of people to serve. Enjoy.
Well, I hear that a lot.
Well, I hear that a lot.
Well, I hope it's a barber shop.
Well, I hope it's a barber shop.
Well, I hope this isn't our last supper.
Well, I hope this isn't our last supper.
Well, I think it's a love story about believing in each other.
Well, I think it's a love story about believing in each other.
Well, I'm building an ark.
Well, I'm building an ark.
Well, if you were going for that rugged look, you overshot it.
Well, if you were going for that rugged look, you overshot it.
Well, if you're not sensitive to that save the rainforest stuff,
Well, if you're not sensitive to that save the rainforest stuff,
Well, it's not really gopher wood. I just like the wordplay.
Well, it's not really gopher wood. I just like the wordplay.
Well, let's not keep our audience waiting, shall we?
Well, let's not keep our audience waiting, shall we?
Well, okay.
Well, okay.
Well, Ryan, he's a stray.
Well, Ryan, he's a stray.
Well, sir, there's a time clock on the bill.
Well, sir, there's a time clock on the bill.
Well, that is an excellent question.
Well, that is an excellent question.
Well, time to update the resume.
Well, time to update the resume.
Well, you haven't been here and now he wants you to sign this in person, Evan!
Well, you haven't been here and now he wants you to sign this in person, Evan!
Were you attacked by a werewolf?
Were you attacked by a werewolf?
What an idiot.
What an idiot.
What are they doing here? How did they get in here?
What are they doing here? How did they get in here?
What are they for? Hey! Hey.
What are they for? Hey! Hey.
What are we gonna do?
What are we gonna do?
What are you doing here?
What are you doing here?
What are you doing?
What are you doing?
What are you doing? Hmmm...
What are you doing? Hmmm...
What are you doing? We can't afford that.
What are you doing? We can't afford that.
What are you talking about?
What are you talking about?
What are you talking about?
What are you talking about?
What are you talking...
What are you talking...
What can we do? I'm suspended.
What can we do? I'm suspended.
What did I tell you? It's fine. It's over.
What did I tell you? It's fine. It's over.
What did we do before GPS?
What did we do before GPS?
What do we have?
What do we have?
What do you do with that?
What do you do with that?
What do you mean there was water damage? It rained for ten minutes.
What do you mean there was water damage? It rained for ten minutes.
What do you mean, hon?
What do you mean, hon?
What do you mean, it doesn't work?
What do you mean, it doesn't work?
What do you think this is, the Oscars? You are not Whoopi.
What do you think this is, the Oscars? You are not Whoopi.
What does that mean?
What does that mean?
What happened? You fainted.
What happened? You fainted.
What in the world? I can't even get my cat to use the litter box.
What in the world? I can't even get my cat to use the litter box.
What is it?
What is it?
What is so important?
What is so important?
What is the story about, then? The ark?
What is the story about, then? The ark?
What is this stuff?
What is this stuff?
What the...
What the...
What was so important?
What was so important?
What you gonna do next? Cornrow your eyebrows?
What you gonna do next? Cornrow your eyebrows?
What?
What?
What? That's weird.
What? That's weird.
What's my point?
What's my point?
What's that?
What's that?
What's with the scruffle, mountain man?
What's with the scruffle, mountain man?
What's with the veil? Did you get your new set of braces?
What's with the veil? Did you get your new set of braces?
What's wrong?
What's wrong?
Whatever.
Whatever.
When might we expect this?
When might we expect this?
Whenever I shave, my beard grows right back out.
Whenever I shave, my beard grows right back out.
Where are we?
Where are we?
Where is he?
Where is he?
Where we are unable to leave the news van due to hazardous conditions outside.
Where we are unable to leave the news van due to hazardous conditions outside.
Who are you?
Who are you?
Who has just been elected Buffalo's representative to Congress.
Who has just been elected Buffalo's representative to Congress.
Who wants champagne? Hip, hip hooray!
Who wants champagne? Hip, hip hooray!
Who wants sandwiches? Let's do it!
Who wants sandwiches? Let's do it!
Whoa, whoa, guys.
Whoa, whoa, guys.
Whoa, whoa! Whoa, whoa! What's going on?
Whoa, whoa! Whoa, whoa! What's going on?
Why are you doing this? Why me?
Why are you doing this? Why me?
Why do you sound like Evan Baxter, but look like a Bee Gee?
Why do you sound like Evan Baxter, but look like a Bee Gee?
Why do you think they call it a crisis?
Why do you think they call it a crisis?
Why'd you come back?
Why'd you come back?
Wild animals running amok in suburban Virginia.
Wild animals running amok in suburban Virginia.
With a slight miscalculation as to the quantity.
With a slight miscalculation as to the quantity.
With a slight miscalculation as to the quantity.
With a slight miscalculation as to the quantity.
WOMAN 1: Well, where did the animals come from, then?
WOMAN 1: Well, where did the animals come from, then?
WOMAN 2: The House will undoubtedly reinstate Congressman Baxter
WOMAN 2: The House will undoubtedly reinstate Congressman Baxter
WOMAN 3: It's a circus is what it is.
WOMAN 3: It's a circus is what it is.
WOMAN OVER TV: Former Buffalo News anchor, Evan Baxter, takes office tomorrow
WOMAN OVER TV: Former Buffalo News anchor, Evan Baxter, takes office tomorrow
WOMAN OVER TV: Good luck, Congressman. Many have tried, many have failed.
WOMAN OVER TV: Good luck, Congressman. Many have tried, many have failed.
WOMAN: Are you concerned at all about Congressman Baxter's tirade
WOMAN: Are you concerned at all about Congressman Baxter's tirade
WOMAN: Congressman Baxter. Good morning. Good morning.
WOMAN: Congressman Baxter. Good morning. Good morning.
WOMAN: It's not working!
WOMAN: It's not working!
WOMAN: The vote of the Land Act Bill has been suspended,
WOMAN: The vote of the Land Act Bill has been suspended,
Would you drop that thing, son? I can't understand a word you're saying.
Would you drop that thing, son? I can't understand a word you're saying.
Would you excuse us for a moment?
Would you excuse us for a moment?
Wow, that's huge. He must be proud.
Wow, that's huge. He must be proud.
Wow! That dance?
Wow! That dance?
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow.
Wow. Honey, did you order anything?
Wow. Honey, did you order anything?
Wow. That is old.
Wow. That is old.
Yea...That's what i was looking at... Oh man...
Yea...That's what i was looking at... Oh man...
Yeah, Baxter! The weather's 70 and sunny with a chance of crazy!
Yeah, Baxter! The weather's 70 and sunny with a chance of crazy!
Yeah, birds are stupid sometimes.
Yeah, birds are stupid sometimes.
Yeah, go on.
Yeah, go on.
Yeah, I know.
Yeah, I know.
Yeah, kind of.
Yeah, kind of.
Yeah, let's head out! Come on. The best is yet to come!
Yeah, let's head out! Come on. The best is yet to come!
Yeah, me, too.
Yeah, me, too.
Yeah, richer friends.
Yeah, richer friends.
Yeah, that's not mine. I didn't order that!
Yeah, that's not mine. I didn't order that!
Yeah, we do, it's in the back, next to the frankincense and myrrh.
Yeah, we do, it's in the back, next to the frankincense and myrrh.
Yeah, well, he is really old.
Yeah, well, he is really old.
Yeah, what's gonna happen is tear gas and a wrecking ball.
Yeah, what's gonna happen is tear gas and a wrecking ball.
Yeah! He's trying to get me fired!
Yeah! He's trying to get me fired!
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. 614?
Yeah. 614?
Yeah. Definitely. He's going with the cherry!
Yeah. Definitely. He's going with the cherry!
Yeah. Good news.
Yeah. Good news.
Yeah. Gotta do the dance. Come on, let's do the dance.
Yeah. Gotta do the dance. Come on, let's do the dance.
Yeah. This'll work.
Yeah. This'll work.
Yeah. We hung out a little.
Yeah. We hung out a little.
Yes, but you did it.
Yes, but you did it.
Yes, his hair is long. Yes, his beard is unshaven.
Yes, his hair is long. Yes, his beard is unshaven.
Yes, I'll tell him. Thank you.
Yes, I'll tell him. Thank you.
Yes, Marty. Your fearless leader is right here.
Yes, Marty. Your fearless leader is right here.
Yes, sir.
Yes, sir.
Yes, sir. Absolutely, sir.
Yes, sir. Absolutely, sir.
Yes, sir. I read the bill, and it's great. I just had a few questions.
Yes, sir. I read the bill, and it's great. I just had a few questions.
Yes, sir. I'm in. Wonderful!
Yes, sir. I'm in. Wonderful!
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes. And I want you, Evan Baxter, to build an ark.
Yes. And I want you, Evan Baxter, to build an ark.
Yes. Successful. Powerful. Handsome. Happy.
Yes. Successful. Powerful. Handsome. Happy.
You almost scared me to death! What's wrong with you?
You almost scared me to death! What's wrong with you?
You and Congressman Long having a barbecue.
You and Congressman Long having a barbecue.
You are approximately 10 seconds away from committee censure.
You are approximately 10 seconds away from committee censure.
You are destroying our national parks for profit.
You are destroying our national parks for profit.
You bought all those lots and you're talking about building a boat.
You bought all those lots and you're talking about building a boat.
You bought eight lots?
You bought eight lots?
You can't beat the Brazilian cherry.
You can't beat the Brazilian cherry.
You can't faint during the Pledge of Allegiance. It's un American.
You can't faint during the Pledge of Allegiance. It's un American.
You could ride all the way down to Pennsylvania Avenue.
You could ride all the way down to Pennsylvania Avenue.
You do not get a sandwich! You're a dog and you do not get a sandwich!
You do not get a sandwich! You're a dog and you do not get a sandwich!
You do not play with stray dogs because they are very...
You do not play with stray dogs because they are very...
You don't get an office like that for nothing.
You don't get an office like that for nothing.
You don't have a choice.
You don't have a choice.
You don't look so good. That's what I said.
You don't look so good. That's what I said.
You ever hear of Home Depot? Here we go! Here we go! Oh, yeah!
You ever hear of Home Depot? Here we go! Here we go! Oh, yeah!
You ever heard of the Arctic white wolf?
You ever heard of the Arctic white wolf?
You got your name on a major piece of legislation!
You got your name on a major piece of legislation!
You guys all right? You okay?
You guys all right? You okay?
You guys can't eat. I can't stop.
You guys can't eat. I can't stop.
You guys, I'm sorry. I can't do that. I have to get back to the ark.
You guys, I'm sorry. I can't do that. I have to get back to the ark.
You have a problem with somebody taking a little profit?
You have a problem with somebody taking a little profit?
You have got to be kidding me.
You have got to be kidding me.
You have no idea.
You have no idea.
You have until September 22 to take it down,
You have until September 22 to take it down,
You hitch your wagon to the right star,
You hitch your wagon to the right star,
You just have to go. We are wrapped.
You just have to go. We are wrapped.
You knew all along, didn't you? You knew the dam was unstable.
You knew all along, didn't you? You knew the dam was unstable.
You know David, you have every right to be freaked out
You know David, you have every right to be freaked out
You know what I want you to do? I want you to open the door.
You know what I want you to do? I want you to open the door.
You know what? You got me. He's here. We're in the middle of a yoga class.
You know what? You got me. He's here. We're in the middle of a yoga class.
You know, a lot of people miss the point of that story.
You know, a lot of people miss the point of that story.
You know, that's just cruel.
You know, that's just cruel.
You know, the animals showed up in pairs. They stood by each other, side by side,
You know, the animals showed up in pairs. They stood by each other, side by side,
You know, those boys were having so much fun tonight,
You know, those boys were having so much fun tonight,
You know, voters don't respond to the gloom and doom stuff.
You know, voters don't respond to the gloom and doom stuff.
You look like a bum in a suit.
You look like a bum in a suit.
You look really old.
You look really old.
You march yourself and your little animal troupe out of here now
You march yourself and your little animal troupe out of here now
You need Super cuts and a shave.
You need Super cuts and a shave.
You need to tell me about it before I need to know about it.
You need to tell me about it before I need to know about it.
You remember Sarah, Allen, Michael.
You remember Sarah, Allen, Michael.
You remember that, don't you?
You remember that, don't you?
You spend time with us and you're home a lot more.
You spend time with us and you're home a lot more.
You stuck in your thumb and pulled out a plum, my friend.
You stuck in your thumb and pulled out a plum, my friend.
You sure did. So what's your plan? What are you gonna do?
You sure did. So what's your plan? What are you gonna do?
You sure you're good? Okay.
You sure you're good? Okay.
You think God zaps them with warm, fuzzy feelings?
You think God zaps them with warm, fuzzy feelings?
You wanna know what I prayed for?
You wanna know what I prayed for?
You want me to get my BB gun?
You want me to get my BB gun?
You want more proof? I haven't done the pillar of salt thing in a while.
You want more proof? I haven't done the pillar of salt thing in a while.
You want some?
You want some?
You want to try this one? Make sure it's straight.
You want to try this one? Make sure it's straight.
You wouldn't do that again. You wouldn't do that. Would you do that?
You wouldn't do that again. You wouldn't do that. Would you do that?
You. You did this to me. You set me up, you crazy son of a...
You. You did this to me. You set me up, you crazy son of a...
You'll make new friends, better friends.
You'll make new friends, better friends.
You're a clean freak. You care much too much about your outward appearance.
You're a clean freak. You care much too much about your outward appearance.
You're all jumpy. Are you on that Fen Phen?
You're all jumpy. Are you on that Fen Phen?
You're God?
You're God?
You're Noah?
You're Noah?
You're right. We did it. We built the boat.
You're right. We did it. We built the boat.
You've got a committee meeting in five minutes.
You've got a committee meeting in five minutes.
You've got the wrong house! You can't leave that there!
You've got the wrong house! You can't leave that there!
Your God experiencing a little water shortage?
Your God experiencing a little water shortage?
Your little display has obviously hit a chord. Gentlemen.
Your little display has obviously hit a chord. Gentlemen.
Your plans. That's just...
Your plans. That's just...
Your reservoir ruptured. Prestige Crest, it's all gone.
Your reservoir ruptured. Prestige Crest, it's all gone.
Yup, yup, I see him.
Yup, yup, I see him.
Yup. I was going to surprise you.
Yup. I was going to surprise you.
15.
15.
...and then with this freaking bill your working on... ...sofort and on and on...
...and then with this freaking bill your working on... ...sofort and on and on...
...one nation, under me... ALL: One nation, under God...
...one nation, under me... ALL: One nation, under God...
...there's a lot... ...a lot of research to do on it
...there's a lot... ...a lot of research to do on it
...we lost over $25 million in business.
...we lost over $25 million in business.
(ALARM RINGING)
(ALARM RINGING)
(ALARM RINGING)
(ALARM RINGING)
(ALL CHEERING)
(ALL CHEERING)
(ALL CHEERING)
(ALL CHEERING)
(ALL GASPING)
(ALL GASPING)
(ALL GIGGLING)
(ALL GIGGLING)
(ALL LAUGHING)
(ALL LAUGHING)
(ALL LAUGHING)
(ALL LAUGHING)
(ALL SCREAMING)
(ALL SCREAMING)
(ALL YELLING)
(ALL YELLING)
(ALPACA CRYING)
(ALPACA CRYING)
(BIRDS CAWING)
(BIRDS CAWING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
(BLEATING)
(BLEATING)
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
(BOTH GIGGLING)
(BOTH GIGGLING)
(BOTH GIGGLING)
(BOTH GIGGLING)
(CAR HONKING)
(CAR HONKING)
(CAWING)
(CAWING)
(CHATTERING)
(CHATTERING)
(CHILDREN EXCLAIMING)
(CHILDREN EXCLAIMING)
(CHUCKLES)
(CHUCKLES)
(CHUCKLING)
(CHUCKLING)
(CHUCKLING)
(CHUCKLING)
(CHUCKLING) MAN ON TV: There's no sign of our heat wave breaking,
(CHUCKLING) MAN ON TV: There's no sign of our heat wave breaking,
(CLAMORING)
(CLAMORING)
(CLEARING THROAT)
(CLEARING THROAT)
(CLEARING THROAT)
(CLEARING THROAT)
(CLEARING THROAT)
(CLEARING THROAT)
(COWS MOOING)
(COWS MOOING)
(CROWD CHATTERING)
(CROWD CHATTERING)
(CROWD CHEERING)
(CROWD CHEERING)
(DOG BARKING)
(DOG BARKING)
(DONKEY BRAYING)
(DONKEY BRAYING)
(DOOR BELL RINGING)
(DOOR BELL RINGING)
(DOOR CLOSING)
(DOOR CLOSING)
(DOOR OPEN) Heyyy!
(DOOR OPEN) Heyyy!
(DOOR OPENING)
(DOOR OPENING)
(DOVE COOING)
(DOVE COOING)
(DRIZZLING)
(DRIZZLING)
(EAGLE CRYING)
(EAGLE CRYING)
(ELEPHANT TRUMPETING)
(ELEPHANT TRUMPETING)
(ELEVATOR BELL RINGING)
(ELEVATOR BELL RINGING)
(ENGINE STARTING)
(ENGINE STARTING)
(EVAN MUMBLING)
(EVAN MUMBLING)
(EVAN SCREAMING)
(EVAN SCREAMING)
(EVE WHOOPING)
(EVE WHOOPING)
(EXCLAIMING IN DISGUST)
(EXCLAIMING IN DISGUST)
(EXCLAIMING IN PAIN)
(EXCLAIMING IN PAIN)
(EXCLAIMING IN PAIN)
(EXCLAIMING IN PAIN)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMING)
(EXCLAIMS)
(EXCLAIMS)
(EXCLAIMS)
(EXCLAIMS)
(EXHALING)
(EXHALING)
(GASPING)
(GASPING)
(GASPING)
(GASPING)
(GASPS QUIETLY)
(GASPS QUIETLY)
(GASPS)
(GASPS)
(GASPS)
(GASPS)
(GONNA MAKE YOU SWEAT, EVERYBODY DANCE NOW PLAYING)
(GONNA MAKE YOU SWEAT, EVERYBODY DANCE NOW PLAYING)
(GROANING)
(GROANING)
(GROWLING)
(GROWLING)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTING)
(GRUNTING)
(HAMMER BANGING)
(HAMMER BANGING)
(HAMMER POUNDING)
(HAMMER POUNDING)
(HAMMER SLAMMING)
(HAMMER SLAMMING)
(HAMMER SLAMMING)
(HAMMER SLAMMING)
(HAMMER SLAMMING)
(HAMMER SLAMMING)
(HAMMER SLAMMING)
(HAMMER SLAMMING)
(HAVE YOU EVER SEEN THE RAIN PLAYING)
(HAVE YOU EVER SEEN THE RAIN PLAYING)
(HISSING)
(HISSING)
(HONKING)
(HONKING)
(KIDS CHATTERING)
(KIDS CHATTERING)
(KIDS CLAMORING)
(KIDS CLAMORING)
(LAUGHING)
(LAUGHING)
(LAUGHING)
(LAUGHING)
(LAUGHING)
(LAUGHING)
(LAUGHING) I love you.
(LAUGHING) I love you.
(LIP SYNCING)
(LIP SYNCING)
(LONG CHUCKLING)
(LONG CHUCKLING)
(MAN CHATTERING ON TV)
(MAN CHATTERING ON TV)
(MONKEY GIBBERING)
(MONKEY GIBBERING)
(MONKEYS SCREECHING)
(MONKEYS SCREECHING)
(MOOING)
(MOOING)
(MUTTERING)
(MUTTERING)
(PEOPLE CHATTERING)
(PEOPLE CHATTERING)
(PEOPLE CHEERING)
(PEOPLE CHEERING)
(PEOPLE CHEERING)
(PEOPLE CHEERING)
(PEOPLE GASPING)
(PEOPLE GASPING)
(PEOPLE LAUGHING)
(PEOPLE LAUGHING)
(PEOPLE LAUGHING)
(PEOPLE LAUGHING)
(PEOPLE SCREAMING)
(PEOPLE SCREAMING)
(PHONE RINGING)
(PHONE RINGING)
(PHONE RINGING)
(PHONE RINGING)
(RACCOONS CHATTERING)
(RACCOONS CHATTERING)
(READY FOR A MIRACLE PLAYING)
(READY FOR A MIRACLE PLAYING)
(REPORTER SPEAKING SPANISH)
(REPORTER SPEAKING SPANISH)
(REVOLUTION PLAYING)
(REVOLUTION PLAYING)
(ROARING)
(ROARING)
(RUMBLING)
(RUMBLING)
(RYAN CHUCKLING)
(RYAN CHUCKLING)
(SCATTING)
(SCATTING)
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING)
(SCREAMING)
(SHEEP BLEATING)
(SHEEP BLEATING)
(SHEEP BLEATING)
(SHEEP BLEATING)
(SIGHING)
(SIGHING)
(SIGHING)
(SIGHING)
(SIGHING)
(SIGHING)
(SIGHING)
(SIGHING)
(SIGHING)
(SIGHING)
(SIGHING)
(SIGHING)
(SIGHING)
(SIGHING)
(SIREN BLARING)
(SIREN BLARING)
(SNEEZING)
(SNEEZING)
(SNORTING)
(SNORTING)
(SOBBING)
(SOBBING)
(STAMMERING)
(STAMMERING)
(THUDDING)
(THUDDING)
(THUDDING)
(THUDDING)
(THUNDER CLAPPING)
(THUNDER CLAPPING)
(THUNDER CLAPPING)
(THUNDER CLAPPING)
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
(TIRES SCREECHING)
(TIRES SCREECHING)
(TIRES SCREECHING)
(TIRES SCREECHING)
(TIRES SCREECHING)
(TIRES SCREECHING)
(WAITING ON THE WORLD TO CHANGE PLAYING)
(WAITING ON THE WORLD TO CHANGE PLAYING)
(WHISTLING)
(WHISTLING)
(WHOOPING)
(WHOOPING)
(WOMAN SCREAMING)
(WOMAN SCREAMING)
(YELLING EXCITEDLY)
(YELLING EXCITEDLY)
Related and similar soundboards you might like: The Interview (2014) Evan Edinger This Is the End (2013) Gator Evan Almighty (2007) The Interview (2014) Sheep The Interview Trailer Fraud SFX Westworld Season 2 Evan Sanders Pineapple Express (2008) Pineapple Express (2008) 💬 Roberto Benigni TTS Computer AI Voice Evan Almighty
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Five Nights At Freddy's Sounds
Five Nights at Freddy's Sounds
Pikachu Soundboard: Hey You, Pikachu!
Pikachu Soundboard: Hey You, Pikachu!
Disney Ringtones
Disney Ringtones
💬 TTS Computer AI Voice
C3PO (Star Wars) TTS Computer AI Voice
C3PO (Star Wars) TTS Computer AI Voice
💬 TTS Computer AI Voice
Peter Griffin (Modern) TTS Computer AI Voice
Peter Griffin (Modern) TTS Computer AI Voice
Yoda Soundboard: Star Wars
Yoda Soundboard: Star Wars
💬 TTS Computer AI Voice
Johnny Elaine - Realistic Fish Head (Spongebob Squarepants) TTS Computer AI Voice
Johnny Elaine - Realistic Fish Head (Spongebob Squarepants) TTS Computer AI Voice
Star Trek Ringtones
Star Trek Ringtones
Daft Punk - Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger Soundboard
Daft Punk - Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger Soundboard
💬 TTS Computer AI Voice
TikTok TTS - Official TikTok Lady Text-To-Speech Computer Voice
TikTok TTS - Official TikTok Lady Text-To-Speech Computer Voice
⚠️ NSFW
Beavis And Butthead Sounds
Beavis and Butthead Sounds
Family Feud
Family Feud
Yoda Ringtones
Yoda Ringtones
Battle Droid Sounds: Star Wars
Battle Droid Sounds: Star Wars
Minecraft Giant Sound Effects Soundboard
Minecraft Giant Sound Effects Soundboard
Meme Soundboard 2023
Meme Soundboard 2023
💬 TTS Computer AI Voice
Adam (ElevenLabs) (aggressive) TTS Computer AI Voice
Adam (ElevenLabs) (aggressive) TTS Computer AI Voice
Merchant Sounds: Resident Evil 4
Merchant Sounds: Resident Evil 4
Carl Johnson GTA Soundboard
Carl Johnson GTA Soundboard
E-Girl Soundboard
E-Girl Soundboard
💬 TTS Computer AI Voice
Darth Vader (New, Version 2.0) TTS Computer AI Voice
Darth Vader (New, Version 2.0) TTS Computer AI Voice
💬 TTS Computer AI Voice
Stitch (Lelo & Stitch) TTS Computer AI Voice
Stitch (Lelo & Stitch) TTS Computer AI Voice
Spy Soundboard - Team Fortress 2
Spy Soundboard - Team Fortress 2
Halo Ringtones
Halo Ringtones
Joe Biden Ringtones
Joe Biden Ringtones
Windows 7 Sounds
Windows 7 Sounds