The Rocker (2008) Edit

A band, huh? So, what do you call yourselves?

A fresh start, you know, get my life back on track.

A penis on a grown woman's face.

A penis.

A.D.D.

A.D.D. A.D.D. A.D.D. A.D.D.

A.D.D., let me introduce you to the mighty Vesuvius.

Absolutely not.

Act like we're back in the garage.

Add? Huh.

After all we've been through? And you sell me out just like that?

Ah, look at you, Cleveland!

Ahem. You want to share this with the rest of the class, huh?

All right, mate? Sticks, this is the bloke what you replaced.

All right, you guys. Let's just think about it like this.

All right.

All right. Can you feel the excitement?

All right. Here we are.

All right. Here we go. Rock 'n' roll!

All right. If he delivers a gig, I'll give him a chance.

Am I the only one seeing this? Why is no one else reacting?

AMELIA: God. FISH: I have news...

AMELIA: Hello? Hey, it's D.V. Put me on shout, yo.

AMELIA: Oh!

AMELIA: This does not suck. CURTIS: You're the man.

And he, like, mimicked their... Aah!

And I want you to know it is never too late.

And I'm not missing the show of my life because of you.

And if this was a week ago...

And it goes on like that.

And now he can't walk during graduation.

And now I'm ready to work here until I die.

And Señorita Horowitz kind of got really stoned...

And somebody kind of drew a, uh...

And soul crushing. Don't forget soul crushing.

And they are in the promised land...

And they have worked so hard, and want this so badly.

And us feeding it right back to them? That is what it's all about, my brothers.

And you know what?

And you'll piss off the record company, which I do not suggest you do.

And you're gonna crap your khakis when you hear this.

And...

ANNOUNCER [OVER SPEAKERS]: All hail the mighty...

Any last requests?

Anyway, if you really are my uncle...

Are you gonna blow this because of some stupid grudge?

Are you gonna finish that?

Are you sure, man? It's kind of hard to tell with his clothes on.

AZIZ: Jeez, this would be a great album if I could ever listen to it.

Bang a gong, get it on. Bang a gong.

Be gentle.

Because he loves you.

Because I would never use that to describe you, ever.

Billy, hang up that phone.

BO Y: I'm telling you, that's the naked drummer.

BO Y: I'm telling you, that's the naked drummer.

But I can make it up to you. What if I told you...

But I'm not, really. I'm here.

But if one hair on his head is harmed, I will kill you.

But my team at Matchbook, we see more than money.

But still, don't tell your mom.

But that is just not me anymore.

But what about the sweet love, where you say, Hey...

By the way, I'm Stan. I'm kind of with the band.

By the way, you better not be here when we get back.

Can I have it?

Can I have it?

Check, check, check. Check, one, two. Check, one, two. Check. Check.

Check, check. Test hit.

Close. It was an old band.

Come on, guys. Let's go. Stage dive. Stage dive.

Come on, it's okay to be nervous.

Come on, Matt. We're going. Tour's over.

Come on. Girlfriend, we need you. Come on.

Come on. Just let it go. Play the gig. Please.

Come... Just meet me up here.

Cool as a fan, man. You're a cool, cool kid.

Cool. Great. Well, come on. Let's go. Let's rehearse.

Cougar's got claws.

CROWD [CHANTING]: A.D.D. A.D.D.

CROWD [CHANTING]: Fish! Fish! Fish! Fish!

Curtis said that the drummer was older. I just... I figured college.

Curtis, had you gone up to him and just said it from your heart...

CURTIS: All right. Come on, let's go.

CURTIS: Yeah, yeah. DAVID: Uh oh.

Cut it, please. Cut...

Daddy bailed when he was 4, so...

Damn right.

David Marshall, head of A and R for Matchbook Records.

David Marshall. We've met a couple times.

DAVID: Ha ha ha! FISH: Hoo hoo!

DAVID: May I introduce A.D.D.'s first video. Pow!

DAVID: Over a million hits and counting.

DAVID: There it is. It's like a school bus for assholes.

DAVID: What about you, Norm from Cheers?

DAVID: You guys realize if you open for Vesuvius...

Did you always have that knee brace in your dream?

Different skill set. Still important. Can I look at what you are writing?

Don't chase something you're never gonna get.

Don't say that.

Don't talk! You are not allowed to speak!

Don't you hate how the camera itself adds 10 pounds?

Double head.

Dude, he can't be killed. He can't be killed.

Dude, we are a band, okay? Bands share everything.

Easy to remember.

Eleventy billion, trillion...

Ever since you forced Fish out...

Every mother's dream. Let's go, Jeremy.

Everybody at Matchbook is happy you worked out your thing.

Everybody loved it and they were singing along with the words.

Everybody thought they peaked when their sixth album went platinum...

Except Fish. Obviously, that would be a little awkward.

Excuse me a sec.

Excuse me, everyone? May I have your attention?

Excuse me?

First blow off. Let the games begin.

First fan. Ha ha!

First marquee.

First recovery.

First technical difficulty.

FISH [WHISPERING]: It's not stealing when you're family.

Fish is the heart and soul of this band. We've been together since high school.

Fish, Fish? Breathe, breathe. You have to breathe.

Fish, no one has eaten more takeout than you.

Fish, we kissed. Once. On tour.

FISH: A gig! Yes!

FISH: And in conclusion, ladies and gentlemen...

FISH: Be right back. More like awesome news.

FISH: Do you have any idea how rare that is? That kind of energy...

FISH: First tour bus.

FISH: Hello?

FISH: I am a golden Fish!

FISH: I don't need you!

FISH: I'm gonna do whatever I want. Watch this.

FISH: Is Curtis at home? Who is asking?

FISH: It's insane. What do you think?

FISH: It's not very good. It's very, very depressing.

FISH: Let's do this. Woo hoo!

FISH: No. No.

FISH: Oh, jeez.

FISH: Oh, man, thanks for letting me stay here, Mr. Lee.

FISH: Oh, man. This is where rock 'n' roll came to die.

FISH: Okay. All right.

FISH: Thanks.

FISH: This is gonna be great.

FISH: What next, guys? BARNEY: Oh, that's a lot of Robert.

FISH: What you working on?

FISH: What? Is anybody else seeing this?

FISH: What's next? Let's keep going.

FISH: What's next? Let's keep going.

FISH: Yes. Yes!

FISH: You know, I'm gonna take a rain check.

FISH: You were out of your mind. Chewing the keys off the board.

Fish. It's okay. Are you okay?

Five minutes? What? We're headlining. We shouldn't go on till 11.

Follow my lead.

Fridge with beer. Beer I didn't pay for.

From the prom.

Funny. Good. I'm just saying it's weird...

Galardy's Bar & Grill.

Gee, nothing gets by you, does it? Yes, I have a tattoo, and I am a mom.

Get it on, all night long, bang a gong, get it on. Rock me, Amadeus.

GIRL: I love you, Matt.

Give me a rebel yell on three. Three, two, one!

Give me your phone.

Give up your dreams. Get a haircut, Fish. You'll never rock anymore.

Go ahead and get to know him better. Give him a nickname. Any animal.

Go back to Cleveland, Cleveland.

Go backwards in slow motion, then say the words backwards.

Go.

Good. Good to know. Okay. We're in the pressure cooker.

Guys, they're gonna put money behind you. That means videos, touring...

Ha ha! Uh oh!

Hang on. A gig? Like when U2 plays and everybody's like:

Hang on. I'll call you back.

He can take it.

He can't be killed.

He deserved it, man.

He doesn't know the songs, and I thought he'd be here early.

He said he didn't need to, he could play with us in his sleep.

He said he feeds on God juice and miracles spring forth.

He stays. That's that.

He's a zombie!

He's been taking some time to recharge the old batteries.

He's come all the way from Los Angeles to meet you, Robert.

He's dead.

He's just taking the piss. You know, one of me mates.

Hello, Concrete Jungle?

Hello, kiddies. You're the band we're supposed to launch.

Hello, rat.

Hello, this is Fish. What?

Hello, Yoko.

Hello, YouTube.

Hello?

Hello? Is this thing on?

Hello.

Hello. Hello there. Hi. I don't think we've been introduced.

Hello. I'm here for A.D.D.

Here we are. Check it out, guys, huh? Not bad.

Hey, are you ready? We're on in five minutes.

Hey, Fish, Fish, Fish. Listen.

Hey, guys. So I kind of got suspended from school today...

Hey, hey. I thought you said we weren't gonna do that.

Hey, hey. Let's rock.

Hey, man. What's wrong?

Hey, Uncle Rob, can I talk to you?

Hey.

Hey.

Hey. Hey, I thought you were grounded.

Hey. Read my lips, asshole. You're fired.

Hey. Thank you.

Hey. We were supposed to start two hours ago.

Hi, Jeremy. Hi, Jeremy's Mom.

Hi.

Hit me.

Hit the brakes, man!

Hit the omelet bar.

Holy sh... Oh, wow. Hey.

Holy shit. I think that's Robert.

Hop in.

How could it not be about a job?

How'd that ever work out?

Huh? That's right!

Huh.

I always hope maybe, you know...

I am breaking up with you, so quiet.

I am fantastic. You don't break up with me.

I am never opening for Vesuvius.

I am not doing that, okay? I am not opening for them.

I am not opening for no Vesuvius.

I am not opening for Vesuvius. They can open for me.

I am with the band A.D.D. I have a demo.

I can't believe you called the cops on me.

I can't... I can't hear you...

I certainly love your objectives, and Stan speaks very highly of you.

I didn't force him out of the band. He quit.

I do notice that your last job was a few months ago.

I do. And so do you.

I don't even wanna talk to him about it. It's so frustrating and it's so unfair.

I don't know why you're blinking more than a normal person...

I don't really listen to heavy metal music.

I don't think it's fair. These kids cancel their tour...

I don't, but at least I'm living in the present.

I either throw up or get the runs before every show.

I feel like I cut loose when I'm on stage.

I got A.D.D. right here with me. This way.

I got the best seat in the house between the guitar and bass...

I got the best seat in the house.

I got us the hottest video director in town.

I guarantee.

I had a job, an awesome gig that was gonna pay $ 100...

I hate that term. It disgusts me.

I have a silly question. Do you have any hand sanitizer?

I have a way...

I haven't played in front of an audience in 20 years...

I haven't played the drums in 20 years. Drumming is pain...

I heard women like a more mature look, so...

I hope you know that I'm getting paid whether we practice or not.

I just wanna say, I am so excited we're on the road.

I kind of brought hash brownies to the Spanish Club luncheon.

I led them to the land of milk and honey and three ways and orgies...

I liked your look.

I lived my life saying, What if...?

I love this kid. Love him. You speak your mind.

I love you, Matt.

I may go moon a trucker.

I mean, it's stupid to think anybody but me would be into it.

I mean, think about it. Fish will land on his feet, right?

I mean, you know, that'd be cool.

I really appreciate it. Yeah, those rice bags look comfortable.

I sat right there for Metallica...

I saw Ozzy bite the head off a bat on that stage.

I say...

I swear if you don't stop annoying me, I'm gonna shave your head in your sleep.

I think I'll take a nap. Excuse me.

I think it's about a job.

I think we lost him.

I think, well, what he's trying to say in a...

I tried growing up, okay? For 20 years.

I tried it. I hated every moment of it, and I'm not going back to that.

I trusted you. I vouched for you and for the safety of these kids.

I want you all to know that me and my band...

I was actually just wondering if you'd play with us at our prom gig.

I was going 60.

I was in an all girl punk band.

I was thinking maybe, you know, just me and you could go together.

I was wondering if you'd play the drums with us, just for one night.

I will drag you down to hell with me. I will eat your souls.

I will not buy beer for you and your friends...

I'd be wearing silk underwear right now.

I'd better stop.

I'd still be the pretty child.

I'll be gentle.

I'll burn you a copy.

I'm feeling really good about the future, you know?

I'm glad it wasn't last week, then.

I'm gonna cut to the chase, because that's how I do, but...

I'm gonna kill you.

I'm gonna shoot you with this old Bolex, stop motion, you're gonna be animated.

I'm not even embarrassed by it, and I'm embarrassed by, like, everything.

I'm not leaving you out, Mattie. I'm saving the biggest hug for you...

I'm not what you would call a social butterfly.

I'm not, either. And don't call my uncle Little Drummer Boy.

I'm really sorry she made me drop a dime on you.

I'm so happy. I'm so happy.

I'm so nervous.

I'm so nervous. I'm gonna be sick.

I'm sorry if you guys have a problem, but that's the way it is.

I'm sorry.

I'm sure you guys got a lot of heat. Lot of people coming after you.

I'm the drummer in the band from the...

I'm working on a song.

I've never asked one to go to a movie or maybe go to dinner, or...

I've never kissed a girl.

If A.D.D. has more tunes like that, then Matchbook is very interested.

If it isn't the one man band.

If we can bring that to an audience, even for four and a half minutes...

If we can drive around with no place to go...

If you guys have been dying to spend some time in Cleveland...

Instead of a canoe paddling in a pond, we were a tank flying down a mountain.

Isn't it something, Cleveland? A.D. D!

It does make you feel invincible, huh? Like everything is possible now!

It goes:

It is never too late to rock.

It is the naked drummer.

It just needs a little bit of love and a lot of product.

It makes me wanna kill myself.

It might be kind of cool...

It must be freeing. It's gotta be freeing, huh?

It was better than good. It was sweet.

It was like that scene in Titanic. You know, the one where they all die.

It's a person I'd like to stab.

It's a song?

It's all about text chats and Playbox with you guys.

It's all right, mates. It's difficult to meet your heroes for the first time.

It's Amelia. She's just having a really tough day.

It's called tough love, kid.

It's his loss. He's the one missing out.

It's just about finding the right showcase.

It's just focusing on the perfect showcase.

It's just one more night, one more show. Just finish what you started.

It's like winning the lottery...

It's not fair.

It's okay, buddy.

It's really good stuff. It's like poetry.

It's the etchings of time, man. These guys have really lived, you know?

It's the prom. It's over at 11.

It's Vesuvius' show. Don't wanna make them look bad.

Just a really incomprehensible way...

Keep going.

Keep stealing my lines, I'll punch you in the eye.

KERR: He didn't fit.

KERR: Right. He's gonna be fine.

KIM: See? It goes red, blue. FISH: I'm lost.

KIM: Sweetie, you were wonderful. Fish, that was awesome.

KIM: Um...

KIP: Welcome back.

Know what I mean? The rope a dope. We're laughing, laughing, then boom!

Know what I'm saying? We need to freshen the look of the band.

Know what our lives would be like?

Know why you're in this band? You're a joke.

Lennon and McCartney rolled into one.

Lennon's rolling over in his grave to hide the boner you just gave him.

Leon, come here, come here.

Let me tell you how it's gonna be. You're gonna suck it up...

Let's get ready to do this show. Come on.

Let's just push the tempo. Say, I'm not bitter.

Let's start looking for a new drummer.

LEX: From the top!

LEX: Jesus, man, keep going!

LEX: Thank you.

Like a Cleveland up and comers open for Cleveland legends thizz ang.

Like all of this is... Ah!

Like he'd lived with animals or something, in the woods.

Like I said, he's a great drummer.

Like you mean it!

LISA: Come on, Robert. Let's go.

LISA: That's the attitude, Robert. Thanks, sis.

LISA: Two arrests in three weeks?

Listen, I had no idea real life was so boring.

Listen. We need to talk to Curtis.

Loads of bands use drum loops.

Loads of elevators play Celine Dion. That don't make it right.

Look at me, Amelia.

Look at me. I am not the world's most handsome guy here.

Look, guppy, I don't think I can do this anymore.

Look, I love Fish. I do. I love that guy. And I never say love...

Look.

Make a path.

Make it turn into a camera.

MAN 1: Go away.

MAN 2: You guys suck. WOMAN 2: Losers.

MAN: All right, thanks.

Matchbook Records just offered us an awesome contract...

Matchbook Records?

MATT [WHISPERING]: I can't believe we're stealing my mom's car.

Matt is also in a band, playing the prom.

MATT: A.D.D.

MATT: Come on, guys.

MATT: I'll call you guys. Please do.

MATT: So good, man. You were so good.

MATT: So good. FISH: Yes.

MATT: Uncle Rob?

Matt.

May I have permission to go with my mates...

Maybe it's I heart Matt LeBlanc from TV's the Friends.

Maybe you want to take a can of shut up.

Midwest tour.

Mike check. Check. Can you hear me?

Mm. That must have been tough.

MOM: Just please be careful. AMELIA: Okay.

Mom?

MOTHER: A penis.

MOTHER: And?

Move a tiny bit.

Move a tiny bit.

Move a tiny bit. Wait a minute.

My brother in law in Vesuvius.

My brother.

My line in the sand has been drawn.

My mom's not gonna let me go to Indiana.

My work here is done.

Never fear, niños. Got our laminates. All access. Drives the chicks wild.

New Vesuvius, fellas.

Nice ride.

Nice show. Whoo!

No one likes the demo.

No, because I show you respect, and then you don't listen.

No, just us three. The band.

No, music definitely plays an important part.

No, no, no.

No, you're not. Seriously, you're not.

No. A tour with parents is not a tour. On this point, I will not bend. That's it.

No. Forget it, Billy.

No. I spent my whole life taking it easy...

No. It's A.D.D., as in attention deficit disorder.

No. No way.

No. Yeah. I know, I keep trying to download the homework...

Not sure which. My choice. Hmm. Make a decision.

Not the way you thought, but you've made it.

Not to mention, it keeps it all in the Matchbook family, which is good.

Nothing. Nothing. You're a tough cookie...

Now get your devil box out of here.

Now go talk to her and quit pussing out.

Now it's time for your prom king and queen's first dance.

Now, as far as the 'do goes...

Now, ladies and gentlemen, A.D.D.

Now.

Of course not. Who said life was fair?

Of course.

Oh, crap.

Oh, dude, this is that thing they were talking about on Stern.

Oh, get a job!

Oh, God. Okay, all right, Fish?

Oh, God. Okay.

Oh, good, you changed it, because Add really blew.

Oh, I'm gonna be responsible, all right...

Oh, Indiana.

Oh, my God, Kerr. You killed him.

Oh, my God, they just called again. They want that joke back.

Oh, my God. He was like a jet plane.

Oh, my God. I'm gonna get that checked out.

Oh, my God. They're lip synching.

Oh, my goodness. That was great, guys. Unh! Give it up.

Oh, my...

Oh, no.

Oh, oh, oh. Hey, buddy. Hey, man. What a coincidence, huh?

Oh, right.

Oh, thank you. I'm really flattered, actually.

Oh, there was talk of you guys opening for Whitesnake...

Oh, Trash, Trash, it's Fish. Fishy. Fish and chips.

Oh, uh oh. Look out, everybody. Genius at work.

Oh, what are you doing here?

Oh, whoa. Curtis, 1991 called. They want their teenage angst back.

Oh, wow. Mattie, oh, it was so incredible.

Oh, yeah, if by awesomely sweet, you mean a horrific train wreck...

Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Oh, you a fan? I mean, how could you not be, right?

Oh, you're serious. Oh, wow. Okay, I'm sorry.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh. What is that?

Oh...

Okay, perhaps last night he was a bit ostentatious...

Okay, what's your point, Matt?

Okay, yeah. He said he won't open for Vesuvius.

Okay? We have gotta cut loose.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay.

Okay. All right.

Okay. Good luck with that.

Okay. I'll try back.

Okey dokey.

On your left, the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

One of those ones I've been looking so hard for.

One, two, three, four!

One, two, three.

One, two, three.

Ooh.

Or streak up and down the bus, or take a nap.

Out of nowhere, we're singing and humming the tunes. Why?

Ow, ow, ow. My carpal tunnel. Okay, put me down.

Ow! Ow!

P. A: Clear the hall. Vesuvius coming through. Vesuvius coming through.

Phew.

Playing this gig...

President of the label wants his nephew in the band.

Pretty cool.

Pretty much, yep.

PRINCIPAL: A.D. D, ladies and gentlemen. A.D.D.

Promised Land is my song. I came up with the title.

Pulled the skin from your faces...

Rats?

Really? If you hadn't been such a jackass, I wouldn't have to be here.

Really? You? A rain check, huh?

Relax. I figured you guys could just practice with Paul.

Rent...? No, no. I was...

Right between the guitar and the bass.

Robby, you know I love you...

Robert Fishman.

ROBERT: I'm busy.

ROBERT: Ow! Robert!

Robert?

Rock 'n' roll.

Same floor and everything.

Save some room for my drums, baby...

Say the words backwards.

Screw these people. It's a free show, dumbass. You don't have a choice.

See you guys. Rock hard.

Seriously, we need to stop this right now.

Set up. Come on.

She's the one sitting over there in the blue T shirt.

Shorties, and I decided to call it an early night tonight.

Shut up, Paul.

Shut up, Stan. Get out of my house, Robert.

Sing it.

Sing!

Slam dance!

Smile? No smile?

Smiling is for the weak.

So have you heard? Matt got into MIT.

So I don't want you to listen to a word he says, okay?

So I wanna say to you right now...

So I was wondering maybe if later you'd wanna get a bite to eat.

So I've taken four webcams...

So sweetie, what time is your mom picking you up?

So this is supposed to be a guitar.

So true. I don't understand it, but that's heavy, man.

So what happened to the old S.W. band? Why'd you give it up?

So you'll be on your feet...

So your choice.

So your dad took off when you were just a little kid?

So, Fish.

So, what brings you to the House of Lee?

So, what do you think, huh?

So...

Some people carry a rabbit's foot, I rock a pocket of puke.

Somebody threw this at me, and it's got a telephone number...

Someday one of these bad boys will have your name on it, C note.

Sorry.

Sorry. You know what? I'm sorry.

Stage dive.

STAN: Just had dinner with him. LEON: Get out of here.

STAN: Matt. Violet, Matt, stop it.

Stop. Stop.

Studio 3.

Sure. Yeah. I'll tell Mattie.

Take care, kiddo. You're a rock star. Whoo!

Take it easy? Thanks, the Eagles.

Take this.

Talk about your missed opportunity. Imagine if he was still in Vesuvius.

Testing, testing.

Thank you very much. You have a great night.

Thank you, Stan.

Thank you. You're closed?

Thanks, Fish.

Thanks, Mr. Lee.

Thanks.

Thanks. My left ankle is making a pretty serious clicking noise.

That allows me to slide wherever I care to go.

That is the moment we knew we were gonna be huge.

That makes sense. Last time I saw you, you were building a robot.

That needs to be fixed.

That was eight years ago, when I was 10.

That, my friends, is what happens when you're a rock star.

That's a mother I'd like to make sweet love to.

That's a nice suit.

That's like 500 albums.

That's my brother in law.

That's pretty great, right?

That's the sound of the money truck backing up to your door.

That's... This guy's hilarious.

The big chair...

The magic of rock 'n' roll. Come on, where's my posse?

The magnetic but tormented lead singer...

The mixing board...

The phone's been ringing off the hook with offers.

The soundproof glass window. The giant headphones.

Then I like to rest and unwind a little bit. Please move.

There he is. I don't recognize you with clothes on.

There it is.

There they are. Woo hoo! A.D.D. Ha ha!

There, okay? Now you've had the experience.

There's a lot of biz buzz on you back in Hollyweird, my man.

There's just one hitch.

There's no need. It's a done deal.

There's the cutest little jazz club...

There's two things in this world I do not trust when they're wireless...

These people came here for live music.

They want you to replace Fish.

They were adults! You're an ad... They were adults.

They were mouthing your words. You were good, Fish.

This is how you pay me back? By being a drunken, irresponsible, drunken...

This is it. This is what it's about, living our dream.

This is really, really important to me.

This is what being a rock star's all about!

This just isn't working for me. I'm sorry. I think it's time...

This little puppy...

This thing on?

This, my friend, is called the drive test.

Those are on me, and those are imported.

Those girls are a dime a dozen. That is why you are in this band...

Those were some great moves, by the way.

Thought we weren't supposed to use the V word in front of Uncle Rob.

Tomorrow never comes.

Too loud is not in my vocabulary. How dare you?

TRASH [IN ENGLISH ACCENT]: Gobsmacked, eh?

TRASH: Who?

Trust me. I know.

Trust me. One track, you're gonna be hooked for life.

Twenty years of What if...?

Uh, Curtis? Honey? Your play date's here.

Uh, okay. The shirt that reads I heart Matt in rhinestones?

Um, so are you familiar with the term PILS?

Um, we were wondering if we could buy you guys a beer or something.

Unfortunately, they are not of age. Fortunately...

Wait, I get it. You guys don't know what it means to go on tour.

Wait. My name is on the list?

Wait. So we're on in five minutes? Seriously, five minutes?

Waited in line two hours last night to get it. Supposed to be amazing.

Wanna get there before all the good T A l L is taken, know what I'm saying?

We are doing it. We're living our dream.

We are gonna be huge!

We are playing the Tiger Room in Fort Wayne, Indiana...

We are through the looking glass, amigos.

We are through the looking glass, amigos.

We can spell.

We got an Ashlee Simpson situation here.

We have not yet rocked Akron.

We lost him.

We need a drummer, okay? And you play the drums.

We need Fish.

We see beyond the gimmick of the naked drummer.

We're finishing the tour.

We're going behind bars, man! This is awesome.

We're gonna be signed. We're gonna be signed.

We're gonna bodysurf you on out of here. Come on. Let's go.

We're gonna bounce that down.

We're gonna hang out in the studio a couple weeks, do more recording...

We're gonna look for new management.

We're hitting the road.

We're not gonna sell him out because some rich kid...

We're not the same without him. You know it.

We're on the Internet. On the Internet.

We're talking an album, a tour...

We've kind of exhausted all our other options, so...

Well, as it happens, by coincidence, it was the new album...

Well, even though he's a genius, he's an idiot.

Well, I'm not exactly sure...

Well, the cyanide and razor blades are in the glove box. Help yourself.

Well, there's a crazy mojo working with Mr. Dark and Broody there...

Well, usually, Curtis's little friends call me Ms. Powell.

Well, you know what? Look at me now, day job!

Well, your body's changing.

Well? You ready?

What did I say about raining on my parade?

What did you just say?

What do you say?

What do you wanna do next?

What have we got to lose?

What if I said yes already? Where does that leave us?

What is this, Full House? Are you kidding?

What is wrong with you?

What? This music is great, and I can prove it.

What? We rocked the balls off that place!

What? Yeah! No, hold on. Hold on.

Whatever. I just need you to do a little babysitting...

Where is Jeremy? I swear, I am gonna kill him when he shows up.

Where's the girl?

Who could that be? Guys, this is your new drummer, Paul.

Who wants to play some crappy school dance anyway?

Who writes these songs, anyway?

Who's this geezer? Why do you have British accents?

Whoa, whoa, whoa! It is not a good idea to go out there.

Whoa.

Whoo!

Whoo!

Whoo! Yes!

Why do you guys have British accents?

Why don't we turn this frown upside down?

Why would we do that? I'll tell you why. Because the songs kick F ing ass.

Why? Because A.D.D. has a gig.

Why's everybody being quiet?

WOMAN 1: You suck.

WOMAN: Do not tell me that this was about them.

WOMAN: No. Well, now you have. Ow.

Woo hoo!

Woo hoo!

Woo hoo! Rock and roll. Thank you, Cleveland!

Wow! All these years, wearing a suit to the office.

Wow.

Wow. That heat is tremendous.

Wow. That's... Five minutes. Eye of the tiger.

Yeah, Fish, having a laugh.

Yeah, great.

Yeah, I didn't pay taxes in the '90s.

Yeah, I don't know. I guess for me, it's always been more about the music.

Yeah, I know.

Yeah, it's a guitar. It's really fun. Do you wanna play?

Yeah, so am I in?

Yeah, that would be great.

Yeah, there we go. All right.

Yeah, U2! I love you.

Yeah, we were kind of looking for someone...

Yeah, with 20,000 Vesuvius fans just chilling on the driveway.

Yeah, you only come by when you need something from my mom.

Yeah!

Yeah!

Yeah! What a show! Come on. Mattie, chest bump.

Yeah! Whoo!

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. All right, I gotta go. I'm in a tremendous amount of pain.

Yeah. All right.

Yeah. All right.

Yeah. I'll be in my office.

Yeah. It's sweet, huh?

Yeah. Put a safety pin in my T shirt and I'm a badass. Good times.

Yeah. The camera and food, right? If you like that, you're gonna love this.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yes. These songs need to be heard, man. Seriously!

Yes. Time to party hearty. Hello.

You are an adult. I mean, technically.

You are not allowed to drive...

You are such an idiot.

You can do what you want. I just think you might want to start to take it easy.

You can take away the wheels and his right to free speech...