Baby's Day Out (1994) Edit

A baby missing from a department store care center.

A baby missing from a department store care center.

A most pleasant and charming good day to you, sir.

A spokesman for the company said that Mr Cotwell was unavailable.

A spokesman for the company said that Mr Cotwell was unavailable.

A spokesman for the photography studio declined to comment,

A tunnel has two ends. This one's here, and the other one's...

All right. All right.

All right. Drink your milk.

And a brush fire in my undershorts. Get 'em outta here.

And detract from your natural beauty.

And see a photograph of the prettiest baby in the city.

And send for backup.

And then let the damn thing loose on the streets.

And you're the only one in the room.

And, to that end, may l ask one small favor?

And, to that end, may l ask one small favor?

Anybody else wanna take a shot?

Are you all right?

Are you all right?

Are you always this stupid, or do you do this just to annoy me?

As far as l'm concerned, you can drop out and l'll keep the $5m. You don't deserve a penny.

As the girder comes up, you jump out on it and grab the baby.

Babies are like that they ain't afraid of nothin'.

Babies crawling in traffic tend to draw attention, don't you think?

Baby Bink is almost a year old and virtually unknown.

Baby Bink is not a regular baby.

Baby Bink!

Baby Bink! lt's your mother!

Baby Bink? What an absolutely delightful name.

Baby luck.

Baby tracks.

Baby, 12 o'clock.

Baby.

Baby.

Bad monkey.

Be there in a second.

Beautiful flowers.

Bing?

Bing?

Boo boo.

Boo boo.

Boo boo.

Bozo.

Bozo.

Buff, buff, buff, buff, buff.

Bye bye. Bye bye.

Chicken!

Come back here.

Come here, you little ball of grief!

Come here, you little ball of grief!

Come on over.

Come on, we'll take the stairs.

Come on. Good boy.

Come on. That's it. Come on.

Cos Mr Teddy Bear over here,

Cos Mr Teddy Bear over here,

Couldn't we read another book?

De...

Dealing with grownups. l don't want no kiddy stuff.

Dealing with grownups. l don't want no kiddy stuff.

Did a baby get off this bus? A little guy, about two feet tall.

Did Baby Bink miss his Uncle Eddie?

Did l tell you?

Did l tell you? The baby's having his picture taken tomorrow,

Did you hear that?

Didn't he put Humpty Dumpty back together again?

Dinner with the Westfalls tonight.

Do you gotta do that?

Does he?

Does he?

Don't blame me. We'd be restin' easy if Butterfingers here hadn't lost the kid.

Don't blame me. We'd be restin' easy if Butterfingers here hadn't lost the kid.

Don't forget to do your breathing exercises Dr Phillips suggested.

Don't forget to do your breathing exercises Dr Phillips suggested.

Don't look down.

Don't look down.

Don't miss it. He's coming.

Don't miss it. He's coming.

Don't tell me. l know, l know. lt's a...

Don't you get...

Earlier l attempted to reach millionaire Bennington Cotwell at his office.

Easy does it.

Ed, can you see the baby from up there?

Ed, look...

Ed, look...

Ed!

Ed! We're down here!

Ed! We're down here!

Ed?

Ed?

Ed. Hey, Ed, what happened?

Eddie, are you OK?

Eddie, he's gettin' up.

Eddie, he's gettin' up.

Eddie, is it?

Eddie, no. Eddie, wait. No.

Eddie, no. Eddie, wait. No.

Eddie!

Eddie!

Eddie! Help me!

Eddie! Help me!

Eddie! What else did Mary's little lamb do?

Eddie?

Eddie.

Eddie.

Eddie.

Eddie.

Excellent!

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Follow that kid!

Follow that kid!

For this was his first trip away from Mother and Father.''

For your baby's sake.

For your children's sake.

From the Downtown Baby Photographers studio

Get her, Veeko. You got her, Veek. Hang in there, Veek. You got her! Come on!

Get her, Veeko. You got her, Veek. Hang in there, Veek. You got her! Come on!

Get the gear.

Get the gear.

Gimme a hand.

Give me a second, l'll think of what he said is the problem with the electrical system.

Go to sleep real nice

Go! No, wait!

Go! Now! Watch your feet.

Good night, Bink.

Good night, Donald.

Good night, sweetheart.

Got you now, you little...

Grab him by the leg or l'll let you go!

Hang on a second. Keep rolling. OK.

Have a nice... day.

Have a wonderful day.

Have you ever lost a child?

Have you guys seen a baby around here?

He can't look too butch, but he can't look too feminine.

He can't look too butch, but he can't look too feminine.

He does well with persons he is not intimate with?

He does well with persons he is not intimate with?

He has to look angelic, like a little prince.

He went down a rabbit hole.

He went down a rabbit hole.

He's always had a lot of trouble with his.

He's back.

He's doing everything in the book.

He's gone! We lost him!

He's gone! We lost him!

He's got a bad heart.

He's photographed Cotwell babies since the Depression.

He's startin' to cry, Eddie. He'll make the monkey mad.

Hello, ma'am.

Hello.

Here he comes.

Here he comes.

Hey, Ed!

Hey, Eddie, maybe he went down a rabbit hole.

Hey, Eddie, maybe he went down a rabbit hole.

Hey, Eddie, you sure you don't wanna go check to see if they left the money?

Hey, Eddie, you sure you don't wanna go check to see if they left the money?

Hey, King Kong. Hey, over here.

House across the street.

How about you, Mr Comedy? ''We'll give her a sandwich,'' huh?

How can he be all right? The guy fell off a building.

How did you get out of Mother Goose Corner?

How did you get out of Mother Goose Corner?

How do l know this milk won't burn the kid's throat?

How'd he do that?

Hurry. Come on, hurry.

Jump!

Just hang on and we'll come on up. l got an idea.

L am afraid it will dominate the photograph

L am Mr Charlie,

L am Mr Charlie.

L am sure in the not so distant future this little fellow will be very well known.

L am sure in the not so distant future this little fellow will be very well known.

L apologize. But would you stay here, please?

L believe in my heart that someone somewhere watches over the babies.

L better let it cool down.

L called because l care.

L can't believe this. You know, it ain't the wisest strategy to kidnap a baby

L can't count the number of times l've been asked why we're keeping our baby a secret.

L did.

L got bad news.

L got him.

L got him.

L have a frog in my throat.

L haven't forgotten your feelings.

L hope you never are.

L just have a cramp in my leg.

L just saw his picture on TV.

L knew this outfit was wrong. l'll be back in 15 minutes.

L lost the kid? l lost the kid? Oh, well, that's news to me.

L see lots of babies with blue eyes and blue outfits.

L so welcome the challenge, madame.

L so welcome the challenge, madame.

L think the ape likes the kid.

L think you hit a cat.

L think you hit a cat.

L think you should move the van.

L thought l saw a baby crawl around the corner.

L thought l saw a baby crawl around the corner.

L thought so.

L wanna erase him from my mind.

L want individual photos of Baby Bink.

L want individual photos of Baby Bink.

L want you to set a new standard for beauty in baby photography.

L want you to set a new standard for beauty in baby photography.

L'd like to ask you a few questions.

L'll be right with you.

L'll get him!

L'll kill him.

L'll pray he comes back to you.

L'm a banana.

L'm a coconut. l'm an entire fruit salad.

L'm a coconut. l'm an entire fruit salad.

L'm hearing that little vermin in my thoughts.

L'm Mrs Cotwell.

L'm serious!

L'm sorry it took so long.

L'm sorry, ma'am.

L'm sorry, ma'am.

L'm sorry, man, but it was an emergency.

L've been having battery trouble.

Let's go get him.

Let's see here. What do we got here?

Lf he gets cranky,

Lf he were home, he'd be going down for his nap.

Lf that matters.

Lf the Mil...

Lf the Mil...

Lf the Milwaukee Mob couldn't kill me,

Lf we see anything, we'll be sure to notify...

Lf we see anything...

Lf we see anything...

Lf you can.

Lf you didn't park your van on the sidewalk,

Lf you'd limit yourself to a couple of pork roasts a day, you wouldn't need to worry.

Lingerie, home furnishings, men's hats, babies.

Look both ways!

Look both ways!

Ls that a fact?

Ls that a fact?

Ls that a Fleetline van?

Lt don't figure, Eddie. They're so small.

Lt is true.

Lt was in the way.

Lt was in the way.

Lt works.

Lt would be pointless and dangerous for you to go out searching for your baby.

Lt's amazing what people will do for money.

Lt's amazing what people will do for money.

Lt's comin' back down. Get ready.

Lt's comin' back down. Get ready.

Lt's just a bad battery. l think we should move it before the engine dies.

Lt's the kid, on television! The one that...

Lt's too bad the baby pictures don't go on the front page.

Lt's true.

May l have some time alone with the child?

Mr Andrews, get the winter wardrobe.

Mr Francis, if you will go to the vehicle and retrieve my light meter.

Mrs Cotwell? Dale Grissom, FBl.

My brother drives one for a dry cleaning firm.

My feelings don't matter.

My money!

My money!

My...

Nanny and Baby Boo stopped at the Old Soldiers' Home to visit Mr Tinsel.''

Nanny and Baby Boo stopped at the Old Soldiers' Home to visit Mr Tinsel.''

Nanny Gilbertine is so tired of the Boo boo book, she could just gag.

Nappy nap time, little jerk.

Nappy nap time, little jerk.

Nice monkey.

No mercy!

No milk puking little thumb sucker's got a candle's chance in a cyclone

No problem, fellas. lt ain't a hole, it's a tunnel. And what's every tunnel got?

No, don't wait. Jump.

No, thank you!

No. l'm here because l've got a wild curiosity about the electric chair.

Norby, hey.

Norby!

Norby! Knock off the singin' and read him his storybook.

Not so easy making jokes with my fist in your mouth, is it?

Now l gotcha! You ain't gonna crawl away from this one.

Now l gotcha! You ain't gonna crawl away from this one.

Now you got it.

Now, if you were a baby lost in the big city, where would you go?

Now, now. Hold still.

Of course.

Of course. Goodness, how could l forget?

Of gettin' the better of me.

Off with the fuzzy pink and blue sweaters, nice and slow.

Oh, but how shiny they're getting.

Oh, great. We're through.

Oh, great. We're through.

Oh, l need his complete attention.

Oh, l see. That's nice.

Oh, my pen! Thank you, Andrews.

Oh, that's a good idea.

Oh, that's a good idea.

Oh, yeah, they drive a lot of those.

OK, good. You got him.

OK, hang on. One, two, three go.

OK, OK. That's it.

Old Willy isn't doing it. l've hired Downtown Baby Photographers.

Our first thoughts were with you and your family, should you not survive.

Over a pile of flaming gonads?

Over here. Hey, look. l'm the Jungle Boy.

Over here. That's it.

People could get by a lot easier.

Photographer de babe, entirely at your service.

Please?

Probably got contusions, concussions, contractions. What's the matter with you?

Put him in the bedroom.

Put him in the bedroom.

Put him in them regular baby clothes. That fruit suit's a dead giveaway he's a rich kid.

Radio Rogers and McCloskey. Tell them we're going to the ticktock to get the boo boo.

Read him his book.

Read him his book.

Ready? Very, very handsome. Let me see.

Right across the street on the curb.

Ronnie Lee has more on the story, Ronnie?

Shall we begin?

Shortly after that at a downtown park. And a final report not long ago at...

Since the media broke the story, calls have come in.

Since the media broke the story, calls have come in.

Sing him a song.

Sing him a song.

Sir, in here.

So, you got a nasty little surprise for me?

Some people.

Sorry we inconvenienced you.

Sorry we inconvenienced you.

Sorry.

Sorry.

Spine.

Spine.

Stay there!

Stay! Stay there!

Step on it, Eddie. Baby, starboard side.

Strolled...

Take all the time you need.

Take it easy.

Take the book.

Take your nap.

Thank you, ma'am.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thanks.

Thanks.

That hurt!

That little doo doo machine is my retirement money.

That little doo doo machine is my retirement money.

That was Nat King Cole.

That wasn't so hard.

That's how you put out campfires.

That's it.

That's it. Slow, slow, slow. There.

That's it. You got it.

That's not a boo boo. That's a clock. A ticktock.

That's where he is.

The great big...

The kid's gone again.

The kid's gone again.

The kid's in the gorilla cage.

The kid's...

The love my baby's gotten has been as much yours as mine.

The more he sleeps, the less attention he draws from the neighbors.

The more he sleeps, the less attention he draws from the neighbors.

The only way to quiet such talk is to have our small minded friends open up their papers

The park is full of...

Then you can't possibly know how l feel.

Then you can't possibly know how l feel.

There are five million people in this city and many places where your boy could be.

There goes our five million bucks, huh?

There he is! l see him! There he is!

There he is! l see him! There he is!

There he is.

There was a report of a man looking for a baby on a bus this morning.

There was a report of a man looking for a baby on a bus this morning.

There you go, my little escape artist.

There you go.

There's no word from police, but our sources tell us

There's no word from police, but our sources tell us

There's the bus again.

There's the bus again.

They do very much.

This ain't no nursery school battle of wits anymore.

This ain't no nursery school battle of wits anymore.

This is a hexed situation. We walk away while we're still ahead.

This is my five foot, ten inches of guile, gut and gristle

This is the end of the story.

This is the end of the story.

This isn't funny anymore.

This morning all l wanted was my baby's picture in the paper.

Though reporters were turned away, a reliable source informed us that Cotwell...

Three fully grown men versus 15 pounds of pink flesh with a mouth.

Three.

To the left, l think. You see? The cab.

Toll booth at the end.

Try it on some skin first.

Up there.

Up!

Up!

Used to do it in Boy Scouts.

Veeko!

Veeko.

Versus your two and a half feet of goo goos, ga gas and giggles.

Very good. Now see if it works the other way.

Wait, Eddie. We don't wanna get a ticket.

Wait, l don't see him.

Wait, wait, wait! Hello! Stop the bus!

Wait, wait, wait! Hello! Stop the bus!

Wait! Wait! Stop the bus.

Walk 'em to the car. My entire reproductive system is about to go up in flames.

Wanna hear a story?

Watch the baby.

Watch the baby.

We ain't here to nick no bric a brac. We're here for the hit of a lifetime.

We better go before l dry!

We better go before l dry!

We get the living hell tore out of us by a baby!

We got some news. l don't know if it's good, but it's not bad.

We got some news. l don't know if it's good, but it's not bad.

We have confirmed that a photographer and two assistants

We just stopped by to admire the beauti...

We took a lickin' and kept on tickin'.

We took a lickin' and kept on tickin'.

We usually used logs.

We usually used logs.

We'll be with you in just a minute.

We'll be with you in just a minute.

We'll get you another one, sweetheart.

We'll go back to banks.

We'll meet you on the other side.

We're always, like, this close.

We're dealing with a baby.

We've read this one a hundred times.

Well, he's pointing to...

Well, he's pointing to...

Were scheduled to photograph the missing child today,

Were scheduled to photograph the missing child today,

What chance have we got of strolling into that alley and coming out with anything less

What else?

What kind of babies? Rich babies? Pretty babies?

What?

What? No, no. Quiet.

What? No, no. Quiet.

What's he doing?

What's the matter with you?

What's the matter with you?

Whatever you wish, however you wish.

Whatever you wish, however you wish.

When we first seen you fall,

Where are you going?

Where else would he be?

Where is he? Come on, knucklehead. Where is he, huh?

Where is he? Come on, knucklehead. Where is he, huh?

Where'd he go?

Where'd he go?

Where'd he go?

Where'd he go?

Where's Bink?

Where's my little boy?

Where's your mommy?

Whoa, look at this place!

Why don't you shut up?

Why don't you shut up?

Won't it be exciting when he can understand the wonderful things we say to him?

Yeah, Listen, l might have some information on the whereabouts of that child,

Yeah, right, Eddie. Blame us.

Yeah, seeing as you burnt down the only tree in your forest, l wouldn't worry about it.

Yeah, that's a good plan, Ed. We grab him as he comes by.

Yeah, this is Carl in 157. You know anything about a missing baby?

Yeah, this is Carl in 157. You know anything about a missing baby?

Yes, l hope so.

Yes, they do.

Yes.

Yes.

You dirty, no good little stool pigeon!

You got any suggestions how you get these things to eat and sleep?

You got any suggestions how you get these things to eat and sleep?

You got burnt clear through your skivvies.

You got the blue sweater. You help me get the gear.

You gotta spit?

You grab him.

You guys are worthless!

You had quite an adventure today.

You have a beautiful little boy.

You have everything? Are you sure?

You heard me.

You jerk!

You know, one thing l learned from all this: l ain't never gonna have any kids of my own.

You left the engine running.

You like that?

You must be so proud.

You OK?

You old bat.

You photographed the children of many of my friends.

You sure can tell summer's here.

You think we can get away with this?

You toasted your marshmallows

You wanna be a shoplifter, go to JC Penney.

You were expecting us?

You were expecting us?

You'll have to ask me later.

You're a smart guy. How do you tell the front from the back on these diapers?

You're doin' good, but you gotta get back up.

You're going the wrong way! Come up!

You're ours now, moneybags.

You're right.

You're surrounded. Throw down the boo boo.

Your garment du jour, while extremely magnificent, is so colorful,

Your garment du jour, while extremely magnificent, is so colorful,

A building under construction. Yeah, that's right.

All right. Don't grab, OK? l'm not touching you. There it is. Go!

And keep an eye on him. Here you go, kid.

Boo boo? lt's what he calls his book. He lost it today.

Boo boo? lt's what he calls his book. He lost it today.

But, madam... Hurry, Gilbertine.

Carburetor? No.

Come here. Get him.

Come here. Get him.

department ...department store''

department. ..department store.''

Did you get him? No! Come on!

Don't coddle me, Mr Grissom. Mrs Cotwell,

Don't let him get away. Here he is, Eddie.

Don't let him get away. Here he is, Eddie.

Don't look down. What are you doin'?

Ed, does it matter who wears pink or blue? No!

Ed, we're gonna have to jump. We're gonnajump?

Ed, we're gonna have to jump. We're gonnajump?

Eddie, come on. Come on, Ed. Come on. Eddie, what happened? Eddie?

Eddie, Eddie, Eddie. Get him, Norby. Get him.

Eddie, Eddie, Eddie. Get him, Norby. Get him.

Eddie, how could he get off? l seen him.

Eddie, how could he get off? l seen him.

Eddie, let me do this. Will you stop it?

Eddie, no! l'm gonna faint! Didn't l tell you not to look down?

Eddie! My money!

Eddie! What?

Eddie? Get off of me.

Get out! Come on! Come on, let's go. l said move it!

He asked for you, Ed. He ain't thinkin' straight.

He asked for you, Ed. He ain't thinkin' straight.

He didn't say ''Get the gear, Veeko.'' l'm the supervisor. You get it.

Here, put him here. Sit down on the bench. Sit down.

His picture's never been published. That cannot be.

His picture's never been published. That cannot be.

How do we do it? Nonchalant. We'll give her a sandwich.

Just drive. l'll tell you. See that lady over there?

l did not! Somebody did,

l grab him? Right.

l have a breathing scheduled at 11. Bless your soul.

l have a breathing scheduled at 11. Bless your soul.

l seen the baby. Where?

l thought he was getting a new boo boo. He means his boo boo's back there.

l'm afraid, Eddie. Freeze. Just stare him down.

l'm afraid, Eddie. Freeze. Just stare him down.

l'm going to look for my baby. l'd rather you didn't. l need you here.

l'm going to look for my baby. l'd rather you didn't. l need you here.

l'm losin' him, Eddie. Quit foolin' around.

l'm sorry for the trouble. Sir?

lt's a pet name for Bennington. Certainly.

lt's an emergency! l didn't have nobody today with a baby.

Ma'am? Yeah?

Me? By myself? You just step out on it. lt ain't difficult.

Now, jump. l'll wait for another.

Oh, yeah? Let you two have all the money? What money? The kid is gone!

Oh, yeah? Let you two have all the money? What money? The kid is gone!

People shouldn't leave this lying around. What are you doing, dope?

Point! Nine o'clock!

Port. What is that?

Pull me back, please! l'm losing my grip.

Pull me back, please. Grab him by the leg.

Regular babies? lmportant babies? Regular babies.

Regular babies? lmportant babies? Regular babies.

Rest on my feet. l could use a hand here!

She don't need a sandwich. Look at her. That's my whole point.

She don't need a sandwich. Look at her. That's my whole point.

Smells great, doesn't it? Come on, let's go move the van.

Starboard. What?

than 140 years in prison? No way.

Thank you. Excuse me.

Thank you. Excuse me.

That was me. You idiots are why we don't got the kid.

There's a guard. He's asleep, you moron.

There's the bus. l see the bus!

There's this little relay thing. Veeko!

These are my kids. Mind if we take a look?

Two. Not you! Hey, Eddie, say somethin'.

Very funny. The front and back are the same. Then it probably don't make no difference.

Wait a minute. We passed him. Yes, moron. We'll grab him as he goes by.

We did all right with banks. Or a convenience store once in a while.

What did l do? You spit on me.

What? He's in the big broad's purse.

What? You got long arms.

Where do you want me to sign? Anywhere's fine.

Where is he? Over here at 6:30.

Which way? This way.

Which way? This way.

Who fell asleep reading nursery stories? Who left the window open?

Why don't you grab him? Nobody asked me!

Why me? Norby's scared of heights.

Why me? Norby's scared of heights.

Yeah. You know what it sounds like?

Yes! Yes, it is.

Yes. On three. Ready? OK.

Yes. Who is this? My name's Depke, Joe, Joe Depke,

Yes. Who is this? My name's Depke, Joe, Joe Depke,

You know, l'm gettin' sick of your insults. Then why don't you quit?

You want money? How much? Don't embarrass me. Don't insult me.

You were blazin' pretty hard... Shut up!

You'd stiff us? Wait a minute!

You'd stiff us? Wait a minute!

You're gonna wake up the baby. The baby's on the roof!

You're makin' me nuts! OK. Don't get crazy.

Your money's no good here. Put it away. Where's the baby?

Your money's no good here. Put it away. Where's the baby?

,,extremely tight, ln fact, police and FBl units have sealed off the area,

,,speculation, but a ransom figure in the millions of dollars was mentioned,

'''You will see the many, many sights of the Big City.'''

''As big as a building,'' huh?

''Baby Boo felt very grown up indeed,

''Before returning home for supper,

''How many, many things there were to buy.''

''Nanny...

''Nanny...

''One fine and sunny day, Baby Boo's nanny Henrietta said

''They were on their way to the Big City.''

'Baby Boo, today you shall go on a wonderful adventure.'''

~ And every which way that Mary went

~ And then she went to unemployment...

~ Anymore

~ Her hair was white as snow

~ Little lamb

~ lt followed her to work one day

~ Mary had a little lamb

~ Mary had a little lamb

~ No private rooms or telephones

~ No, she won't worry you

~ No, she won't worry you

~ She had you worried, but this is war

~ She had you worried, but this is war

~ The lamb was right behind her

~ This is the army, Mr Jones

~ You and your baby went to town

~ You and your baby went to town

~ You had your breakfast in bed before

~ You had your breakfast in bed before