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Home > Weekend at Bernie's (1989)
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Weekend at Bernie's (1989)

Weekend at Bernie's (1989)

Weekend at Bernie's is a quirky comedy film released in 1989. Directed by Ted Kotcheff, this zany flick follows two friends, Richard and Larry, played by Andrew McCarthy and Jonathan Silverman, as they embark on a hilarious adventure. When they discover their boss, Bernie, portrayed by Terry Kiser, has passed away, they hatch a wild plan to maintain the illusion that he's alive and party with him all weekend. As their charade unfolds, mishaps and misunderstandings abound. If you're up for some laughter, you can relive the amusing moments from Weekend at Bernie's by playing and downloading sounds from this delightful movie here.

A big job. We have been working hard.
A little brownnosing, ass kissing, to work our way up that corporate ladder.
A little more gas.
A little present.
A little tuck here, little sand there, a little lift there.
A very big job.
About what?
All I have to do is just keep setting my goals and working hard...
All of this could be yours, if you set your goals and work hard.
All right, Lar.
All right. Good.
All right. Okay.
All right. See, that's better.
Amazing.
And don't try to cover up for him, either.
And how am I going to get back to the city? He promised me a ride.
And I lose again.
And I!
And I'll kill him if he's cheating on me. Now, where the hell is he?
And not have to scream and get run over by garbage trucks?
And of course my parents were rather well off.
And they are all at home doing their hair right now.
And you are late for the creative sales meeting, Mr. Lomax.
And, now, we're going back to the house of death.
Anything going on?
Are we allowed to talk or anything?
Are you dead, too?
Are you nuts?
Are you trying to give me a heart attack?
As the Big Apple becomes the Baked Apple.
As you might have heard...
Asshole!
Babes. A boat. A car.
Back it up.
Bastard!
Beautiful apartment. House at the beach.
Because I'll do it. This was all your fault.
Because there are too many people around.
Because...
Because...
Bernie has such little time, so can you come back later?
Bernie is gonna have us killed?
Bernie is waiting for us.
Bernie was...
Bernie, come on.
Bernie, he needs you, too.
Bernie, I gotta talk to you.
Bernie, I've got to talk to you.
Bernie, I've got to talk to you.
Bernie, open up.
Bernie, wait a minute.
Bernie, we are on a phone here.
Bernie, you cheat.
Bernie, you lying swine.
Bernie, you should have been on the court.
Bernie! How are you doing? Great place.
Bernie?
Bernie.
Bernie.
Besides, I figure I can thank Bernie tomorrow.
Besides...
Better get you out of the sun, huh?
Booze and women. That is my lifestyle and I love it!
Brilliant.
But how do you afford a place like this?
But I can't do that to you. Thank you.
But I just want to tell you I am sorry for being such a jerk last night.
But I'd like to go over these numbers with you...
But I've made some wise investments. I dabble in the stock market.
But if you were to look at the back page, where the policy indexes are...
But Lomax is dead. He isn't around anybody anymore.
But the look on your face when you fell through the trapdoor.
But this is ridiculous.
But we've got a problem here.
But you know where we'd be spending our weekend...
But you said we were going to spend the weekend at the beach!
By the way, how's your aunt?
Bye bye, ladies. We'll see you later.
Call me Bernie.
Can I have a cigarette?
Can just lock ourselves in until they get here?
Can we stay at your house until the cops come or what?
Can you just give me 30 seconds?
Carry your weight, here, Richard.
Cheap bastards. Turn off the air conditioning on the weekends.
Checkers. Excuse me, sir. Is this your launch?
Cigarette.
Color me old fashioned, Rich, but I just love the park on a Sunday.
Come on, baby. You're not a woman. Are you? Tell me the truth.
Come on, Bern.
Come on, Bernie.
Come on, Bernie. Up.
Come on, Larry. Move it.
Come on, let's go.
Come on, let's go. Up.
Come on, Rich.
Come on, you had too much again, you big knucklehead.
Come on! Lighten up there, Rich! We are on our way!
Come on.
Come on. He is crazy.
Coming around.
Community Chest.
Company.
Cut it out.
Darling, you look wonderful.
Darn you, Bernie.
Dead.
Different kind of dead.
Do I need that much?
Do something, Rich.
Do you hear something?
Do you want to sit?
Does anybody live up there? A lighthouse keeper or someone?
Does it?
Does that taste anything like walnut dressing? Tell me.
Does this look like 10:00, or like 10:30?
Doesn't anyone realize he's dead?
Don't be ridiculous! What are you doing? We are not jumping on this boat!
Don't do this to me.
Don't forget. Wake me up.
Don't panic.
Don't panic.
Don't slap him. That's your boss.
Don't worry about it.
Don't you see? We just uncovered a $2 million error.
Don't you worry, Mr. Lomax, we'll make you some coffee, fix you right up.
Door.
Either get on the elevator or get off.
Especially when using a fluctuating COL index to combine...
Ever been in a lighthouse before?
Ever been there? Well, you will love it.
Everybody parties from house to house, but they always end up here. Bye!
Excellent.
Excuse me, Vito.
Excuse me.
Excuse me. Is this the way to...
Feels good, eh, Bern? You are really loose.
Fell on the train.
Ferry's gonna leave.
Finally see some light at the end of the tunnel and wham! Gone!
Fists of steel.
Fix me a drink, will you?
For a couple of bright fellows like yourselves.
Forget the accident with the two guys.
Fuck off, Larry.
Fun while it lasted, huh?
Gas.
Gentlemen, what have you got for me?
Get him, Rich.
Get his legs.
Get off.
Get out of here!
Get out of there.
Get the handshake in, okay?
Get your ass out of here. It is too hot.
Get your hand off me, Bernie.
Get your pages.
Girl. Beach. Sand. Surf. Moonlight. Did you ever see Here to Eternity?
Give me $600, we'll call it square.
Give me your money and your wallets.
Give us plenty of time together, no distractions.
Glorious day out, or what?
Go ahead. Oh, God.
Go see Bernie about it. Go see Bernie.
God damn it.
God, it's glorious out, huh?
God! Just once, I'd like a woman like that.
God.
God. Look how much is here.
Good evening, young lady.
Good job.
Good weekend, Bob?
Good! It's settled.
Good.
Goodbye, Richard.
Goodbye, young man. Nice talking to you.
Got a little scotch?
Got him, Lar.
Got it? Hold the boat.
Got to move your workout to late tomorrow afternoon, B.
Grab him. Larry.
Great party last night, Bernie. Your best ever.
Great writer.
Great, I hope the killer keeps that in mind.
Great.
Gwen and I, Thursday night, 8:00 p.m., dinner.
Gwen just invited me to stay with her. What should I say?
Gwen, it's not what you think.
Gwen, listen to me.
Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is...
Hampton Bay Police Department.
Hang on, Lar.
Have fun. See you at the next one. Larry!
Have I ever told you I never liked the name Gwen on you?
He better be alone.
He can't be.
He couldn't have.
He has got a goddamn pool at the beach. It's heated.
He has got a steel plate in his head.
He looks good enough. Let's go.
He said something about a note, right?
He'd want this.
He'll just go away if you just be quiet.
He's been soaking in the ocean for two hours.
He's been working awfully hard, you know.
He's dead.
He's getting too careless...
He's got a knife.
He's got nice form.
He's gotta to be, Rich. I dumped him here myself.
He's my butler. But...
He's not. He's like dead, man. Come on, let's walk him around.
He's probably making the rounds.
He's screwing my girlfriend.
He's sleeping.
He's... He's with me.
Hello, Betty.
Hello! Bernie, we are here.
Hello?
Hello.
Hello. No, haven't seen him. But we just got here.
Her father and I, we went to Harvard together.
Here we go, sugar, move it over! Okay, baby?
Here we go.