Diff'rent Strokes (1978) - Season 1 Edit

A black couple's coming here tomorrow morning to see you.

A doggy.

A head transplant is what you need.

A lovely tune.

A real cool dude?

A sweet, wonderful woman.

A very civilized person, isn't she?

A wonderful human being.

About $4,000.

Abracadabra, abracadabra. It is gone.

Ah.

Aha! You're here.

All for me!

All I got to do is look in the mirror.

All I want to do is what's best for you guys 'cause I love you.

All right, all right, I've been sucked in.

All right, boys, you can run up to your room and listen to your classical records.

All right, dear.

All right, Mr. Drummond.

All right, Mr. Drummond.

All right. Okay, fellas, get ready for breakfast.

And a Knicks Lakers basketball game, what would you say?

And a yacht, too? Yes, indeed.

And all the time I thought there was one dude who was colorblind.

And black children with black families.

And frankly, I'm surprised.

And he sure treats us right.

And he's the only goldfish we ever saw laugh.

And how glad I am that you are staying, Willis.

And I just got an A in kicking where it hurts.

And I say 7:00 a.m. tomorrow morning, we split.

And I walked home all the way through Central Park without being mugged.

And I want you to feel free to call me, should the need arise.

And I was sure he wanted to sell me.

And I'm delirious Arnold.

And just what did you tell her?

And make important decisions.

And now that Mama and Papa have died, we got to look out for each other.

And now, I care about you.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, you're about to be entertained

And someone would do something else,

And sometimes, I ain't so sure about you.

And still truthful, of course.

And swim in our pool, or go fishing off our yacht,

And that social worker could be here any minute.

And that was only because I tried to poison him.

And then I'd dance ballet in my little tutu.

And then you put it in your mouthie poo.

And then you stick it in the eggie poo,

And they jump to the wrong conclusion.

And they're simply marvellous boys.

And what's that? I quit.

And when he speaks, nobody listens.

And when it comes to women, do you...

And where's Willis? I have to talk to you boys about something very important.

And why not?

And you are welcome to use it any time you want.

And you can be a perfectionist,

And you can be very demanding.

And you make a wonderful father.

And you're not even willing to meet us halfway.

And you're treating him like our old landlord.

Any chance seeing that circus at a different time?

Anyway, Saturday night, we have tickets

Are you Mr. Drummond? Yes.

Are you ready for this, gang?

Are you sure he said that?

Are you trying to make me feel rotten?

Aren't they adorable?

Aren't they gorgeous? Real boys.

Arnold, after Papa died,

Arnold, do you miss seeing other black children your age?

Arnold, get off that thing.

Arnold, it ain't us that died and went to heaven, it's Mama and Papa.

Arnold, that is the second time this week

Arnold, there's a handy ladder here for you to make it easy.

Arnold, we don't belong in no penthouse.

Arnold, we don't belong in this place.

Arnold, what are you doing in there?

Arnold, what could you say?

Arnold, what you did was a very natural mistake.

Arnold, what's the matter?

Arnold, when they was passing the brains out,

Arnold, when you hurt, I hurt.

Arnold, you little... Dummy.

Arnold, you sleep up top.

Arnold. You don't really want to leave, do you?

As I told you yesterday, Mr. Drummond, black children belong with black families.

Be careful of my goldfish. His name's Abraham.

Because somebody my size might decide to keep somebody your size

Before he puts us in a jockey suit and plants us on the front lawn.

Before those boys will give up all this and leave you.

Besides, look at what they've got here.

Black children belong with black families!

Black children what?

Black or white, it's love that counts.

Boo!

Boo!

Boy, you guys are a tough audience.

Boys,

Boys, I want you to meet Mr. and Mrs. Thompson.

Boys, listen,

Boys, there is someone here I want you to meet.

Boys, this hurricane that just blew in is my daughter, Kimberly.

Boys, this is Ms. Aimsly, a social worker, who's come to pay our happy home a visit.

Boys?

Boys?

But Arnold and me ain't gonna take no charity.

But caring has to be a two way proposition,

But have patience, the day's just started.

But he didn't say one word about us staying.

But I did it because I cared about your mother,

But I got feelings about things, too. I think you're wrong.

But I learned a very important lesson.

But I sure am glad to have you both here.

But I...

But I'm still going to make one final suggestion.

But if that's the way you want it...

But just don't go drinking no water before bedtime.

But see, when you love someone,

But that's not exactly what I meant.

But then it just might be that money can buy happiness.

But we were up there counting our blessings.

But Willis, how many kids like us got a chance like this?

But you can't buy us.

But you said if we wanted to leave, the door was always open.

But you were happy this morning. I mean, what's the problem?

But you've been a sourpuss from the minute we got here.

By the way, guys, stay out of my room or I'll punch you out.

By the world's greatest magician, the great Drummondo.

Can I get you a drink, Mrs. Aimsly?

Can't a man be proud and own a pony at the same time?

Can't we split after breakfast?

Certainly do have a lovely place to live in.

Charmed, I'm sure.

Charming place you have here, Drummond.

Children, just a minute. I want you to take my card.

Color TV, stereo, our own cook.

Come 7:00 tomorrow morning,

Come here, Arnold.

Come in. Come in.

Come on, Arnold.

Come on, Arnold. We're still leaving in the morning.

Come on, guys, I want to show you the way to your room.

Come on, I want to show you your room and my hot tub.

Come on, Mr. Drummond, cheer up. Eat your breakfast.

Come on, Willis, join the fun.

Come on, Willis, join the fun.

Come on, Willis. Get in there and get your share.

Come on. Arnold took it. That ain't no trick.

Come on. Enjoy yourself.

Come, little brother.

Come, little brother.

Come.

Coming, Mr. Drummond.

Coming, Mr. Drummond.

Confidentially, the man is loaded.

Confidentially, this place would make the greatest garage sale in history.

Did you hear that? "A real cool dude."

Do we get time off for good behavior?

Do you drink, Mr. Drummond?

Do you hear that, lame brain?

Do you know what that social worker was just telling me?

Do you think she'd send us to live with somebody who didn't want us?

Do you want me, Mr. Drummond?

Does that mean I can say,

Does this count as a word?

Don't get too used to this place.

Don't worry about it.

Don't you realize we have everything going for us now?

Don't you think we have any brains?

Downtown two minutes, and already, we're gentlemen.

Drummond ain't our people, and we ain't staying here.

Eight, trying for nine.

Every suggestion I make before I can even suggest it.

Except for me.

Except Harlem.

Family fun time? What channel is that on?

Family is love and caring.

Far out, man.

Fellas, I've got some great news.

Fellas, this is Mrs. Garrett, our housekeeper.

For a guy who don't want us to stay, he sure is pretending like he does.

For me, likewise.

Forget it.

Forget it.

Forget it. They've already eaten.

From getting any bigger.

From Harlem.

Get a load of that bicycle, Willis. Yeah.

Get Kimberly, and I'm gonna tell you both what I'm going to do.

Go ahead, Arnold. Okay.

Good evening, fellas.

Good evening, Mrs. Garrett.

Good morning, Ms. Aimsly. Please, come in.

Good night, boys.

Good. Goodbye.

Goodbye.

Got big places in Harlem, too.

Happy children making happy jokes.

Harlem?

Hasn't this been an absolutely terrific day?

Have you ever lived in a non black neighborhood before?

He ain't coming yet.

He did say it. What do you want, an instant replay?

He probably breaks them and takes them right to the bank.

He said, "Black children belong with black families."

He sure can put on a good act.

He'll probably throw a party after we leave.

He's gotta learn to do things for himself.

Hello, Arnold, Willis.

Hello. Please, sit down.

Her number's on the pad there.

Here come the clowns!

Here comes Arnold.

Here comes Dr. J. Oh, yes.

Here, Mr. Drummond.

Here, Mrs. Garrett.

Hey, come here, boys, I want to show you something. What?

Hey, hey. What's wrong with using the ladder, Arnold? That's what it's for.

Hey, I can't tell you how proud I am of you

Hey, I'm so darned glad to have you fellows here, I can't tell you.

Hey, that's real... We can't go.

Hey, that's... We can't go to that, either.

Hi, metal mouth.

Hi, Mr. Drummond.

Hi, sweetheart. Hello, Daddy.

Hi, there. Hi.

Hi. Hi, fellas.

Hi. How do you do?

Hold it, boys. What did I say?

How about 6:00 tomorrow morning?

How about that, Willis?

How can I eat?

How come you keep telling us what to do all the time?

How do you do, Mr. Thompson? Mrs. Thompson.

How do you do? I'm happy Willis.

How do you like it?

How much bread did you lay out for this washtub?

How much did he get for you?

Huh?

I ain't stubborn, I'm proud.

I always wanted a son and now I got two of them.

I am going to open up a whole new world for you.

I am not opinionated.

I been sitting here soaking and thinking.

I can't believe that.

I can't wait to get rid of these dumb braces.

I could say this is a place I wanna die and be buried.

I could use some.

I do?

I don't do windows, and I don't do boys.

I don't need any ladder.

I don't understand.

I don't want no accidents.

I get the impression you're going to turn down

I got it right this time.

I guess 'cause we're the latest fad in honky land.

I guess I just haven't been able to make them feel like they're part of the family.

I guess there's only one thing bigger than my ears. My mouth.

I had a wonderful day at the office. I've got two fine boys,

I hardly know them.

I hardly slept a wink all night, thinking about those kids.

I have a feeling that my new tenants are planning to leave.

I have here in my hand a $10 bill.

I heard him telling Mrs. Garrett.

I heard him. My ears aren't painted on.

I heard you say it.

I just managed to get tickets for the circus, 8:00 tomorrow night.

I know you like the Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairies.

I know.

I love a little joke.

I loved her very much.

I mean it. Get off there!

I mean, sometimes people hear a part of a conversation,

I never had any fun till I was old enough to count.

I never smelled the garbage in Harlem.

I once lost a small lawyer in this room.

I only asked for one thing.

I see.

I still can't understand why the boys want to leave.

I sure hate to miss a good party.

I thank you. And my dentist thanks you.

I think I better have a talk with the boys.

I think I'll try the Fosberry Flop.

I think that may be for you.

I thought we'd be better off with a black family.

I thought you liked it here.

I want to show you the view from up here.

I was merely repeating what the computer said.

I was merely repeating what this rather opinionated lady here said.

I was referring to the boys, but you, too.

I was standing right up there and looking down on your bald spot

I wasn't trying or thinking of Arnold.

I wonder what she wants.

I wouldn't lie to you, Willis. What I heard is what I heard.

I'd be glad to. Here, let me have this, dear.

I'd do what you tell me to do, Willis,

I'd say I'm available for both events.

I'll buy you a tetanus shot.

I'll get it.

I'll get it.

I'll get me a skin transplant.

I'll get you a flag to plant up there.

I'll wear a bell around my neck.

I'm 13. Trying to get out of here.

I'm a very lucky man.

I'm glad, Arnold.

I'm going to karate class

I'm going to see that you have the same advantages that I had growing up.

I'm gonna make the $10 bill disappear.

I'm in love with them already.

I'm just trying to make you feel at home.

I'm not comfortable here,

I'm not trying to buy you.

I'm sorry, Mrs. Garrett. I didn't mean to startle you.

I'm sorry, Willis.

I'm sorry.

I'm sure glad you're my big brother.

I'm sure.

I'm telling you, these kids are living in the lap of luxury.

I'm the darling next size up.

I'm tired of making sparks with my fork.

I'm your big brother and I'll take care of it.

I've been practicing, Willis.

I've got a surprise for you.

I've got a terrific way to surprise the boys tonight.

I've never seen a black goldfish before.

If Abraham looks like he's dead, don't worry. He's just sleeping.

If I'm dreaming, don't wake me up.

If Mama was alive,

If this was heaven, I'd kill myself tomorrow.

If we help you fence it, we get half.

If you behave yourself, Willis, today, I'll buy you your own gang of kids.

Imagine, living up so high you can't even smell the garbage.

In case you hadn't noticed, we're black.

In my family, fun was sitting around counting our money.

In other words, you don't know what killed them.

Isn't he beautiful?

It means we better get out of here

It might be better if you just simply said

It might be helpful if you could say something,

It must be nice to be L O D I D.

It reminds me of our little flat in London.

It was a pleasure meeting you, Ms. Aimsly.

It's a little joke.

It's a pony!

It's a pony! Yipee!

It's a toy store!

It's easy. You take your little forkie poo,

It's for both of you, Willis.

It's just that things ain't working out.

It's my kind of pad, too.

It's these thick carpets.

It's true. I do have money, but I really care a lot for those boys.

It's worth every cent.

Just in case.

Just once.

Just shut up and give me a hanky.

Just sit up.

Just tell me one thing that I did wrong.

Just the opposite, I'm afraid.

Keep looking.

Kemosabe, make way for the Lone Arnold.

Kimberly. She's 13.

L O D I D.

Let's shake hands like a brother.

Like after dinner, someone would sing

Living in a place with 200 year old chairs.

Look at that view, Willis.

Look, Mr. Drummond, you done a nice thing promising Mama you'd take care of us,

Look, Willis. Look, Willis.

Look, you can see the whole city from here.

Man, ain't this something?

Man, this is better than anything I ever saw on The Brady Bunch.

Man, Willis, I think we died and went to heaven.

May I ask what line of business you're in, Mr. Thompson?

Maybe I overdid it,

Me, too, short stuff.

Misunderstandings do occur

Mmm mmm!

Mr. and Mrs. Thompson. How do you do, sir?

Mr. Drummond said we belong with a black family.

Mr. Drummond, I think I will tell my computer to go suck a lemon.

Mr. Drummond, it's very dangerous to sneak up behind me.

Mr. Drummond, the children.

Mr. Drummond, this is the couple I was telling you about.

Mr. Drummond, will you take me and shorty here back?

Mr. Drummond, you bought a lot of nice toys.

Mr. Drummond's right.

Mr. Thompson, you better leave your name and address,

Mrs. Garrett, are you passing?

Mrs. Garrett, I'm a very fortunate man.

Mrs. Garrett, if I told you that Arnold and Willis

Mrs. Garrett, why don't you take the boys' things

Mrs. Garrett, you're next. What're you going to do for us?

Ms. Aimsly is bringing a black couple here tomorrow morning.

Ms. Aimsly, Philip Drummond here.

Ms. Aimsly. And I never drink on the job.

Ms. Aimsly. Social worker.

My ex husband had the same problem.

My tutu has turned into a tutu by 4 4.

My, we're in an especially good mood this evening.

Never mind.

Nice climbing, Arnold. Yeah.

No wonder they can't play basketball.

No wonder you got tension.

No, Arnold, that's French for "I blew it."

No, but I gotta. Without me, Willis is nothing.

No, I mean you're gonna have to work for it.

No, I'll do it. I'm very good with doors.

No, it wasn't me, it was just some stock.

No, it's an antique, you see. The older it gets, the more it's worth.

No, ma'am. If I miss seeing a black kid my age,

No, only my hair is bleached.

No, please, I promise I'll never scare you again.

No.

No.

No. Arnold, you're not in any trouble. Yet.

Nobody speaks for me but me.

Not one word out of you, Arnold.

Not that anyone would want to.

Now,

Now, Arnold, you know that that's impossible.

Now, boys, I'm strict, too. I always tell you right from wrong.

Now, I'm gonna tell the social worker how much I like you guys.

Now, it's very important to all of us that she sees how much you like it here.

Now, let's see. What could you say about me that's nice?

Now, stop crying and tell me what's bugging you.

Now, tell me why you're crying.

Now, that's a joke.

Now, that's no excuse. I've got tired blood, too.

Now, that's what I call an excellent meal.

Now, then, Mr. Drummond, I have a couple of questions I'd like to ask you.

Now, then, Mr. Drummond, I understand you're a widower.

Now, then, the children.

Now, why are the d****s closed? It's such a lovely day.

Now, why would he say a thing like that?

Now, you boys know that there's a social worker dropping by today

Of course he is.

Oh, adopting two more children?

Oh, and wrong from right.

Oh, Arnold, you only overheard a part of the conversation.

Oh, believe me, Mr. Drummond,

Oh, by the way, that social worker called three times.

Oh, Daddy, isn't this delicious?

Oh, Daddy, please don't let them leave.

Oh, excuse me, boys.

Oh, hey, I am not offering charity.

Oh, Jeffrey, look at the darling little one.

Oh, leave that for now, Mrs. Garrett, it's family fun time.

Oh, look at them, Daddy, just look at them.

Oh, man, talk about a fast haircut.

Oh, Mr. Drummond, can I give you a hand with the boys?

Oh, never. Never.

Oh, now, come on, Arnold. We've always been straight.

Oh, our main home's on Long Island.

Oh, please do.

Oh, really? Mmm hmm.

Oh, the radio.

Oh, they're here.

Oh, we won't be needing anything.

Oh, well, I never know till the spotlight hits me.

Oh, well, I'll tell ya,

Oh, when they're that little, they really need a magnifying glass.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, yes, sir. There's just one thing left to do.

Oh, yes. Please, come in.

Oh, yes. Yes, of course. Willis? Arnold? Would you come down here, please?

Oh! I did it. I did it!

Oh. Oh.

Okay, guys, I'm gonna leave you alone to unpack.

Okay, I'll tell her you got all your own teeth.

Okay, if you go eating onions, don't go breathing up.

Okay, Mr. Drummond.

Okay, okay. So I did overlook a little thing like two boys.

Okay, Willis.

Olivia, are you thinking what I'm thinking?

On a clear day, you can see New Jersey.

On her deathbed, she asked me to look after her two boys.

Or are you the only one in the family that got the disease?

Or you won't even get dinner tonight.

Orphans?

Our family fun was entertaining each other.

People are dull and boring and...

Perhaps Peter and the Wolf.

Please help me make them feel at home here.

Please, be seated.

Please, come in. Thank you.

Please, don't do that again.

Please, Mrs. Garrett, they're orphans.

Quit? Oh, no.

Ready for what?

Rembrandt, Van Gogh, Chopin.

Remember now, if he don't want us here, we'll show him we don't care. Get up there.

Right here in this room with a color TV and stereo.

Right.

Saturday night, we gotta go to our friend's birthday party.

Say, there's a thought.

Scaring the buns off you.

See, we can all learn something from each other.

See? It was nothing.

She asked Mr. Drummond to take care of us.

She better not mess with me, or else I'll reach up, belt her in the knee.

She got it right.

She was like a member of the family.

She's at boarding school, but she comes home weekends

She's not kidding.

So much for the great Drummondo.

So you boys are really happy living here?

So, that's it.

Soak away your troubles,

Someone has to sell them the barrels.

Sorry to keep you waiting, Mr. Drummond.

Stand back, everybody.

Suppose I sit on one and it breaks?

Sure.

Ta da!

Thank you, Thompson.

Thank you, Willis.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you. You're welcome.

Thanks, Mrs. Garrett, you really cheered me up. Now, all I feel is miserable.

Thanks, Willis.

Thanks.

That black couple's gonna have to be something else

That front door is always open any time I want to leave

That it's been her observation that black children belong with black families.

That makes me sickie poo.

That white children are usually happier in white families,

That you couldn't imagine wanting to live anywhere else.

That you reconsider my other two suggestions.

That you've scared me half to death.

That's all for you guys.

That's an old Drummond tradition.

That's okay, he never saw a rich white man before, either.

That's right, Willis, toys and money ain't family.

That's right, Willis.

That's right, Willis. Harlem is just a limousine ride away.

That's right.

That's right.

That's the only way somebody my size is gonna scare anybody your size.

The boys will be here any minute.

The boys will be here any minute. Is their room ready yet?

The boys...

The great Willis is about to do his famous disappearing act.

The last cool dude we knew, he got five years for stealing a hot car.

The older it gets, the more it's worth.

The one with the birthday.

The only one who ever walked out on my cooking was my ex husband.

The only thing I'm guilty of is trying to make you and your brother feel at home.

The trick is to get the $10 back from Arnold.

The way to do it is to have a little fun with them. Family fun.

The whites are attacking the Indians, and the Indians are winning.

The worst part of it is, you're only thinking about yourself.

There's only two people we can trust, and that's you and me.

There's something I want to say to you.

They all friends of yours?

They bite.

They have no relatives that can take them in.

They're all dead, dodo head.

They're here.

This darling little one is my goldfish.

This is a hot tub.

This is a tough world we live in, Willis.

This is Arnold and this is Willis, Kimberly.

This is Arnold. And this is Willis Jackson.

This is Arnold. And this is Willis.

This is dancing!

This is my kind of pad.

This is some place.

This is Willis and Arnold Jackson.

This Mr. Drummond is a real cool dude.

This tub works pretty good, doesn't it?

Those are our favorites.

To have a place where you can think about life and reflect.

To keep me from using the phone.

To our room. Come on, Arnold.

To see how you're doing, right?

To the Knicks Lakers basketball game.

Toys and money ain't family.

Turned down a chance to see the circus,

Uh oh. He's coming up.

Uh oh. Whatever it is, I didn't do it.

Unless that's at 6:00 in the morning.

Unless you happen to be a zebra.

Up to their room and I'll show them around?

Very well. I'll be expecting you.

Wait a minute, fellas.

Wait, that was the bad news. Now, for the good news.

We ain't the right color.

We all get together after dinner and we have fun entertaining each other.

We also got a happy goldfish named Abraham.

We can never be too careful in these cases.

We could get killed in the stampede.

We could say you're a real cool dude.

We even got a phone in the car.

We use the London place just for weekends.

We'd love to have you.

We'll give it a try. We'll do what you say.

We're goin' back to Harlem and that's that.

We're goin' back to Harlem and that's that.

We're here because before Mama died,

We're on the 30th floor.

We've just met and already he's insulting me like a real brother.

Welcome, big brother.

Welcome, gentlemen.

Welcome, little brother.

Well, come off those clouds, little brother.

Well, here it is, boys.

Well, I guess I won't wake him up.

Well, I guess that's all the questions that I have for the boys.

Well, I guess we told the man.

Well, I know we're going to make one big happy family.

Well, I miss the gang of kids.

Well, I must say that you children

Well, I'll go up and call the boys for dinner.

Well, if there's any time you'd like to come out to the island

Well, if you're gonna turn bad, that's the way to do it.

Well, it's been my observation

Well, just don't go spilling to anybody that we're leaving tomorrow,

Well, may I suggest something, sir?

Well, now, I'm your mama and your papa.

Well, sometimes, you're a little overbearing,

Well, the boys seem to be getting along just fine.

Well, then, you discuss it first before you do anything about it.

Well, they lived a very long time ago.

Well, up you go, Tonto.

Well, we'll just have to do it another time.

Well, we're packed and ready to make tracks.

Well, what do you think of your big new house?

Well, what time would you prefer?

Well, yes, under the circumstances...

Well, you don't want to miss family fun time.

Well, you know all the oil the Arabs have?

Well, you're very kind and loving.

Well...

Well...

Went out and bought? Yes, sir.

What are we gonna do, Willis?

What do you think he'll do 'cause we called the social worker?

What does that mean?

What have you got against boys?

What killed them?

What you talking about, Willis?

What you talking about?

What?

What?

What? That I ain't there.

What's a garage sale?

What's all that stuff for?

What's she smoking?

What's so funny, guys?

What's that?

What's the matter, Willis?

When anything's bothering me, I just slip into the tub and it eases away my tension.

When our landlord in Harlem painted our building white.

When she was six days old, she gave the boy in the next crib a fat lip.

When they're that little, they need a lot of love.

When you hired me yesterday, you said you had one 13 year old daughter.

Where are we gonna live in Harlem?

Where you can learn about things like art and music.

Which friend is that, Willis?

Which half did I get this time?

Which in some countries is worth as much as 65 cents.

Whichever we happen to get involved in first.

Who was it that looked after you while Mama worked?

Who's that?

Why can't we stay here?

Why do you want to leave?

Why not? Arnold's gotta rest.

Why not? The more, the merrier.

Why should you be?

Why would he pretend to like us, Willis?

Why, when I was only nine, I overheard my father talking,

Willis,

Willis, I ain't going in this ocean without no lifeguard.

Willis, I guess I just committed another faux pas.

Willis, I know you're my brother and I'd do what you say,

Willis, I understand that you called that social worker this afternoon.

Willis, if I lose my head, there goes all the brains we got between us.

Willis, if you boys had left, I was thinking about leaving with you.

Willis, sit up. What for?

Willis, was Papa as stubborn as you are,

Willis, we were sitting on a fortune in Harlem and we never knew it.

Willis, what did you do that for?

Willis, where are you going?

Willis, why do we have to go back to Harlem?

Willis, you going in that thing?

Willis, you heard the man.

Willis, you take the top, Arnold, you sleep in the lower bunk.

Willis!

Willis? Arnold?

Willis.

Willis.

Willis.

Willis...

With all your money, couldn't you afford to buy a new one?

With the Thomases.

Won't you please sit down?

Yeah, and I wanna miss Harlem the rest of my natural life.

Yeah, baby. It's obvious that these boys belong here.

Yeah, but just remember, Mr. Drummond,

Yeah, but they're all falling down.

Yeah, eight people, one room, one bathroom.

Yeah, I had a chat with the lady.

Yeah, I heard.

Yeah, it goes to sleep an hour before I do.

Yeah, just like King Tut.

Yeah, King Tut.

Yeah, Mr. Drummond's Santa Claus,

Yeah, that's him, all right.

Yeah, well, tell us something about yourselves. How old are you?

Yeah, well, watch yourself.

Yeah, you did.

Yeah, you got tired blood.

Yeah, you sure are to have a gem of a housekeeper like me.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. And if you don't have anything to do yourself sometime,

Yeah. Maybe we could leave later.

Yeah. Right.

Yeah. Them fairies are something else.

Yeah. Then he got spanked by his mommy, 'cause he wasn't old enough to drive.

Yeah. We would have been here sooner,

Yeah. You know, if he wanted us to stay, he would have tried harder.

Yes, a lovely little doggy. Get in there, honey.

Yes, I am. You're doing a great job.

Yes, I do.

Yes, it is.

Yes, ma'am.

Yes, please.

Yes, sir.

Yes, their mother was my housekeeper for many years.

Yes, we'd love to have you.

Yes?

Yes.

Yes. And you've coached them very well.

Yes. They went out and bought pizza and beans.

Yes. Those happy, well adjusted little tots.

You also have a teenage daughter.

You and me are going back to Harlem where we belong.

You better check your smeller, fella.

You boys are going to love it.

You boys started all this because you thought...

You call that dancing? Uh huh.