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Home > Bad Boys
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Bad Boys

Bad Boys

"Bad Boys" is a thrilling action-comedy film released in 1995, directed by Michael Bay. Starring Will Smith and Martin Lawrence, this movie revolves around the hilarious yet dangerous adventures of two Miami narcotics detectives, Mike Lowrey and Marcus Burnett.

Will Smith portrays the charismatic and smooth-talking detective Mike Lowrey, while Martin Lawrence brings his comedic talents to the role of Marcus Burnett, the protective family man. Their chemistry on screen is undeniable, creating a perfect blend of intense action and laugh-out-loud comedy.

The plot kicks off when a stash of heroin is stolen from the police station headquarters. Mike and Marcus are assigned to work together to catch the culprits and recover the drugs before they are flooded into the streets of Miami. From high-speed car chases to explosive shootouts, the duo takes viewers on an adrenaline-filled rollercoaster ride.

Joining the cast is Téa Leoni as Julie Mott, a witness to a murder connected to the stolen drugs. As Mike and Marcus work to protect her, they become entangled in a web of deception and betrayal that tests their partnership. Their contrasting personalities lead to hilarious banter and memorable one-liners that have become iconic in pop culture.

The film's success can be attributed to the perfect balance of action, comedy, and chemistry between the lead actors. It spawned a franchise, with two sequels following in 2003 and 2020, both continuing the thrilling escapades of Mike and Marcus.

In addition to the film, the "Bad Boys" song, performed by the renowned musical duo Inner Circle, became synonymous with the franchise. Released in 1993, this reggae-infused track perfectly captures the energy and excitement of the movie. With its catchy chorus and infectious beat, it became an instant hit and has remained popular ever since.

Luckily, fans can still enjoy the sounds of "Bad Boys" anytime they want. By visiting the official movie website, they can easily find a link to play and download the sounds associated with the franchise. Whether it's the adrenaline-pumping soundtrack or memorable quotes from Mike and Marcus, these sounds bring back the excitement and nostalgia of the beloved film series.

"Bad Boys" is an unforgettable movie experience that combines heart-stopping action, hilarious comedy, and a phenomenal cast. With Will Smith and Martin Lawrence leading the way, viewers are guaranteed a wild ride through the mean streets of Miami. And now, with the ability to play and download the sounds associated with the franchise, fans can relive the excitement whenever they please. So buckle up, grab your popcorn, and get ready to join the Bad Boys for a wild and unforgettable ride!

A joke.
A policeman shot on South Miami and first street.
Actually, this guy called me this morning, desperate every two hours
Actually, your baloney has about 30 names,
Ah, shit!
Ah.
Ahh, damn.
Ain't nothin' goin' on between me and Theresa.
Ain't this a bitch?
All I ever wanted to be was a cop. I get up early and take it to the Max every day.
All right, all right.
All right, all right.
All right, this guy is paintin' me into a corner.
All right? What's up? P.M.S.?
All right.
All right.
All right. How things goin' with the kids?
All that heroin. Gone.
All visitors must be announced!
Always have (JULIE TALKING, INDISTINCT)
Always makin' it hard on yourself, jojo.
Am I turning into the guest that won't leave?
An out of work photographer who doesn't know how to cook.
And 20 in cash.
And can you please drive this thing? Please drive!
And gimme a pack of tropical fruit bubblicious.
And he left us nothin' but a big "fuck you."
And how about the wire transfers?
And I been your boy all my life.
And I forgot all the pictures was here.
And I was Max Logan's best friend.
And I will make my deal.
And I, you know, obviously seem to be kind of a major glitch
And I'll only talk to Mike Lowrey.
And if we rush it, we're gonna have a lot of drugs that we can't sell.
And it's right back on, baby.
And Mike will all be very happy livin' here.
And next time you have to kill 'em,
And she said if she ever needed anything
And so it required the taking off of the ring, that's all, for a second.
And some skittles.
And that would be the tall one or the short one?
And the girl? (EDDIE) Nobody.
And there's gonna be some jolly young men who wanna party.
And there's some of our high grade heroin over there.
And they put it into this machine and grind it all up.
And this french guy, they took some really horrible pictures of me.
And we're not walkin' away from this bust. I don't give a shit what she says.
And while we're discussin' my ass? I damn near got it blown off.
And you chuck it on me
And you chuck it on your father
And you chuck it on your father
And you chuck it on your sister
And you, you're you. You be you, but not in front of her.
And your kids? They're good?
And, uh, just, uh, well, you know, like our situation.
Anything for you, but I can't get in. I tried.
Anything like that you could swing at me, do you?
Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.
Are there any new guys partying a lot, spending a lot of money?
Are you listenin' to me, baby? I said Mi I read a book...
Are you trying to blow this whole case?
As far as I am concerned, you can keep the wedding ring in your pocket.
Aside from that fact, I'll tell you something else.
At your home, all right? I can handle goin' to your place.
Baby
Baby, it's my job. It's what it requires.
Baby, she's a material witness. That
Back up. Don't need no help.
Bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do?
Bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do?
Bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do?
Bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do?
Bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do?
Bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do?
Bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do?
Bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do?
Bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do?
Bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do?
Bad boys, bad boys whatcha gonna do?
Bad boys, whatcha want
Because I know what it looks like. Did you get my message?
Because if we don't, they're gonna kill her.
Because this had to have been an inside job, and I'm gonna find out about it.
Believe me, we wanted to tell you.
Believe me. Did you did you sleep in the bed? You didn't feel the dents?
Besides, you know, this is illegal.
Blow me? What the fuck? No. Hump me. That's all right.
Blue convertible, two visible occupants. Check it out, all right?
Bookie.
Born of a mother with the love of a father
Both police officers involved in the incident...
Boy, everybody's 'bout the motherfuckin' jokes today, ain't they? Hello?
Boy, your daddy has that same problem. I got the ears.
Bring me a coke, Mike. Baby, you want a coke?
Bullshit. I am feeling much better, though, thank you.
Burnett! Come here. Come here!
But guess what the good news is. I got a witness.
But he got to deal with us today.
But I got the ring. Look, I just put my hand
But I had a perfectly good shot at him. If your friend action Jackson over here
But I never gave them you or the girl!
But it couldn't have been him; He was killed in prison. What about his crew?
But let me tell you something.
But no, you got to go off by yourself.
But that's not important 'cause it's not like it's your job to protect people.
But until then until then, you are Mike Lowrey.
But you all right. You cool.
But you know what? They just out there for you to listen to people's problems.
But, oh, yeah, my partner can get some quality times.
By the time we figured out how, we'd be out of a job.
Call you from here. Don't let him up. Don't let him up.
Can handle it, but I'm worryin' about me.
Can somebody talk to me, please? Can I know what's goin' on?
Can we have the keys? Mike wanted me to go to this gunfight.
Can we help you?
Can you go down, have a coke and a smile, please?
Can you please do some work?
Can you stop so I can talk to you, please?
Can you, um, um, um,
Can't be in Cleveland.
Captain, these fools could have gotten a look at my license plate last night.
Check it, Lowrey. We got two days left. Let's try to do this right.
Chet I got a magazine and everything.
Chet, trust me on this, okay?
Chet. Hey, Mr. Lowrey.
Clear. We're in.
Cleveland? I have never
Come here, come here. Dukie, dukie, whatever.
Come on, baby.
Come on, come on! Let's go! Get out of here!
Come on, Francine. This Eddie dominguez file cannot be that hard to get into.
Come on! Move your ass! Let's go. Let's go!
Come on. Marcus will kill us if he finds out. Give it to me.
Come on. That shit be havin' a slant. It's a
Come. Sit. Okay.
Computer. You're not taking care of shit.
Could be the party I'm looking for.
Could turn this nightmare into a media frenzy.
Cover her.
Dad, at school, people say I look weird.
Damn!
Damn!
Damn.
Damn. I must have left some incense burnin'.
Damn. Mmm.
Damn. Um nah, I went undercover.
Damn. What are you weighin', 350?
Dead guy. Dead guy.
Definitely be an inside job. Don't rule it out.
Deposit confirmation requested.
Desi was the brains behind the whole thing.
Detective Burnett. How are ya?
Did you go to college?
Did you have a date last night?
Did you have sweet dreams?
Do it real fast, real well. We're lookin' for a real pro, jojo.
Do it!
Do something that helps this case. Boy
Do that now.
Do what? That's flesh...
Do you know how many chemicals are in this stuff?
Do you see the fuckin' emotion I'm goin' through
Do you understand? I understand.
Doesn't that piss you off? (RUIZ) That pisses the fuck out of me.
Don't "honey baby" me. You smell like perfume.
Don't be alarmed. We're n****es.
Don't be lookin' at me. I said, yeah, "I love you." I said that shit.
Don't blow the case.
Don't bring it here! Don't bring it here, all right!
Don't deny me this.
Don't do anything. Just call me with their location.
Don't even breathe, you knucklehead!
Don't ever say I wasn't there for you. (PANTING)
Don't fuck with me. One main guy.
Don't get me started. Get outta the car.
Don't give me that crap. You're on your way to being reassigned!
Don't go tellin' my son your sleazy sex stories.
Don't kiss me. I don't know where your lips were last night.
Don't let me have to come down to school.
Don't worry. I'll keep everybody calm until my backup arrives.
Don't you feel a little... funny?
Don't you know you're human being?
Don't you?
Down here. Yeah. It's totally fucked.
Duckin' and weavin' up and down.
Ears, stuff like that
Eddie... It's my family now.
Eddie's got some favors to play with.
English.
Enjoy yourself. Relax.
Enough with the smooth shit. It's not gonna work anymore.
Enough! Please!
Especially since they think you some rich kid playin' cop.
Every junkie in America will be high off our bust.
Everybody wants to be like Mike.
Everything's gonna be all right. Trust me. Hey
Excuse me, ma'am. Ma'am.
Excuse me? Mike said that we're going to a club.
Excuse me.
Excuse me. That was crazy Yvette.
Extremely flammable ether.
F.B.I., d.E.A., they got nothin' on him.
Family's the most important thing, you know. Is it?
Feel like I had a million of 'em. (SWITCHBLADE CLICKING)
Find out who she worked for and find out where she lives.
Fine, lady. Where would you feel safe?
Fine. Fine.
Fine. It look like a chip of shit.
Fine. Split up, check around. Meet you at the bar in ten minutes.
Fine. That helps. From here, okay? Okay. All right.
For years, Sinclair has been up my ass, tryin' to pin somethin' on me.
For you to even let some dumb shit like that creep up in your mind
For yourselves? A little gift from me to you.
Forget about it. I'll just deduct it from the hundreds of favors I owe you.
Former cop, okay? We got rid of him a long time ago.
Fouchet, we're still friends.
Fouchet. Fouchet, I think.
Francine, can I please have the parole jacket on Noah trafficante?
Freeze, mother bitches!
From now on, that's how you drive!
Fuck off, barkin' ass dog! Shut up!
Fuck that. Fuck that! I'm not goin' down over this shit!
Fuckin' Marcus, are you talkin' to me?
Fuckin' egghead motherfucker. He got four eyes and glasses.
Fuckin' errand boy, that's what you are.
Fuckin' shoes suck. Get her!
Gay. (SCOFFS) If I was, I'd change the d****s in this motherfucker.
Gee, Julie. What have you been up to the last couple days?
Get down!
Get her!
Get in the car!
Get in the car!
Get in, Mike! Come on!
Get it done, goddamn it.
Get it up. Well, maybe we'll check it out.
Get out of the car.
Get outta here, all right? If you don't stop
Get the dog! Get my dog! Here, doggie!
Get the fuck outta here, man. Where's Julie?
Get to this address now. I'll wait 'til Mike
Get up!
Gimme a name. Gimme a goddamn name!
Give me the address. All right. Okay.
Give me the bat! You want to go out? Fine! You don't want to believe me,
Given what your job. What you do.
Gives him ideas. Why you puttin' me in this?
Gives me a rush. Uh, look,
Go after 'em! I'll go around front. I got 'em.
Go ahead. Burn it off, baby.
Go back. Go back.
Go upstairs and take this. Take it!
Go, go, go, go! Watch it! Watch it!
Go, go, go. All right, all right. I'll do it. Yeah.
Go, goddamn it!
Go, goddamn it! Go, go, go!
Go, goddamn it! Go! Okay, okay.
Go!
Go! Go!
Go! Let's go! (JULIE) You're cops! Why are we running away?
Go.
Go. Titty titty, strutty strutty.
Goin', goin' shit. A little off.
Good boy.
Good to see you. Have fun.
Got me climbin' like a fuckin' chimp!
Got my babies in the house.
Got some jewelry for you. Ah!
Gun right up to his head. They're gonna shoot each other. This is unbelievable.
Guys, ho! Ho! Hey!
Ha ha ha ha ha! Don't laugh!
Ha ha ha.
Half naked women popping by tonight that I should know about?
He ain't even worth killin', man.
He ain't worth it! Do you want some?
He didn't mention it to me.
He didn't tell you I was comin' in the airport early?
He doesn't talk that way. Talk like him like him! Try to talk sexy.
He gets kinda nervous in new surroundings and
He got a rich mama and daddy who live out in coconut grove.
He just shits, huh? Yeah, it's sort of it's like marking his territory.
He sells the ventilation plans to the bad guys. He gets rich, but he gets dead.
He steals our shit, kidnaps Julie, shoots at my wife.
He works at club hell. Thank you.
He'll kill the girl anyway. We're not gonna let her die.
He's a motherfuckin' joke.
He's been feeling upset and having diarrhea and throwing up all morning.
He's followin' up this Lois fields lead.
He's in there! (MIKE) Here! Go!
He's workin' out of his house this week. That's the number.
Hell of a night. I'm goin' to bed.
Hello, police? I just saw something terrible:
Hello! We're your new neighbors.
Hello?
Hello? The guy's got a Cannon!
Hello. Hello?
Here that I think you need to know about.
Here we go.
Here you go. (JOINTS CRACKING) Ahh!
Here's where it is, right here. Point blank, up close and personal.
Hey, baby! Hey, Francine. Where's Howard?
Hey, do you want me to yell at you? 'Cause I can do that.
Hey, does it look like I care? Whatever it takes, all right?
Hey, hey. Hey, hey. Here we go.
Hey, how much is that?
Hey, listen, are there any other totally hysterical...
Hey, look. Wh wh where's your cup holders?
Hey, man, back up off me, okay? I'm doin' an illegal favor for you.
Hey, man, the transaction is done, all right?
Hey, man. Don't play like that, okay?
Hey, man. Why you got to call my place a zoo?
Hey, Mike, who's the guy in all the photographs?
Hey, the chick. Look. No, no, no. The chick!
Hey, this is real cop stuff. This is not Charlie's angels.
Hey, we got anything, Francine?
Hey, what are you doing? Get oh, look.
Hey, y you ain't with the bad guys now. You with the cops.
Hey! Shut up!
Hey. Ooh, I can't believe she went there on you.
Hi. Can I help you?
Hi. You like Al Capone, don't you?
Hi. You must be Max. Welcome.
His ass upstairs. Supposed to be my boy. You motherfucker!
Ho! What did I say? Did you hear what I said?
Ho. Ho ho. Oh, that's cold.
Hold it. You know Sinclair got every phone in the damn station tapped.
Hold on, please. Talk to her.
Hold on. This is some funny shit.
Hold the fuck on! All right, you want some bad enough? Come get some!
Hours. I could go upstairs and watch the door.
How 'bout there goes our only lead to Max's killer?
How could you say that?
How did you miss 'em? Hey, you fat fuck!
How do I know it's Mike Lowrey?
How do you make contact?
How the hell you gonna leave my ass at a gunfight to go get the car?
How's that potty trainin' thing goin'? (LAUGHS)
Huh! Huh!
Huh? Um
I ain't even gonna, you know nah.
I ain't got time for these games. This is the witness.
I am from the middle east! I kill before. I kill again!
I am on the verge of solving this case.
I been beat three times since we been out here.
I been pagin' you all night. We got a situation
I bet his wife's enjoying the smoothness right this minute.
I bet you a big popeye chicken eatin' motherfucker, ain't you?
I bet you it's up in the old hangar section.
I blow you! Then I blow you!
I brought you my family.
I can't be shacked up with that woman!
I can't believe I let you see it. Uh! Motherfucker!
I can't believe she made it!
I can't believe you. Somethin' wrong with you. There is?
I can't imagine the kind of woman...
I can't remember the last time that we fell asleep together.
I can't work with that kind of stupidity! Stupidity?
I cannot believe you complainin'.
I care about Max also.
I come with the thunder.
I confuse my own shit. Uh
I damn near had to pass a pop quiz before she believed I was him.
I didn't ask how he feels. I said, "what did he see?"
I didn't mean to offend you. It's like okay to be a homosexual, Mike.
I do. You're cool, man.
I don't care if you go bald. Get it and let's go.
I don't care what they say. Tell 'em you're making a delivery for Mr. fouchet.
I don't care what you say.
I don't care. I don't care! The ether that
I don't even taste the salt now. (TAPPING KEYBOARD)
I don't get it. (PHONE RINGING)
I don't give a damn about his personal files. The man's dead. Un block it.
I don't have one. What do you mean you don't have one?
I don't know nothin' about it. I'm sick of this bullshit!
I don't know what you're gonna tell 'em. Why can't he go? Why can't you go?
I don't know, steel, and I'm feeling
I don't know. I was too busy tryin' to keep a bullet out your ass.
I don't mind bats swung at my head, bullets damn near grazin' my ass.
I don't play that shit. Ahh!
I don't see any girl. There's no girl.
I figure since I'm gonna be like Mike, I might as well dress like Mike.
I forgot all about that. He looked cute like that, I think.
I give you badges! Here, 99 cents each! I sell you some.
I got a better idea. I'm getting off in two
I got her. Bullshit. I got her. I got her.
I got married so I could stop lyin'.
I got the address in the in the office.
I got you connected inside!
I gotta call the wife. Whose wife?
I gotta get my dogs. Come here, dukie.
I guess they want us to come in, take a peek.
I guess we should just leave.
I guess when you guys get back,
I had to sleep on my couch. I wake up this
I had to stash her somewhere her and her dogs, Luke and dukie.
I hadn't really thought about it much.
I have a family to look after. My wife will kill my ass!
I have their mobile phone number.
I haven't killed anybody yet today, captain.
I hear three little Burnetts comin' down the hall. Oh, you're cold!
I heard what I said 'cause I was standin' there when I said it.
I I I'm just an errand boy.
I I know. So let me m Marcus. Marcus. Marcus.
I I'm just here to help you.
I just hang out with stupid ass friends that drive stupid ass cars...
I just I just I just (THERESA) Mike?
I just put a bullet in the chemist who fucked with my timetable.
I keep tellin' you in Max's line of work, she definitely gets the 411.
I knew it! I didn't even have to call the fuckin' psychic line!
I knew Max, okay?
I know sometimes you wanna let go
I know that it's no time to joke, but remember in the movie
I know. I know. I've seen police. W w what are you?
I like a woman who takes pride in her appearance.
I love knowing that one leak, one headline,
I love you too, man.
I love you, man. Fuck you, Marcus.
I love you, Marcus.
I mean like... funny.
I mean, he's still out there. Oh.
I mean, he's very... Sort of take charge.
I mean, maybe it was all the guns and stuff.
I need a SWAT team, helicopters
I need to jump over this car and smack you in your peezi ass head.
I need to talk to detective Mike Lowrey.
I need your help.
I needed to blow off a little steam after the, uh, the move, you know?
I offered to pay Mike for the cleaning. He wouldn't hear of it.
I recognize you from every one of the photographs.
I runnin' out. I got a shirt open. You see Mike. He half butt naked.
I saw the whole thing.
I see you treat yourself well, Eddie.
I staked out all night in the back of that jalopy too. I think I earned a peek.
I suddenly feel a little case of it comin' on right now.
I think I will call you. (GRUNTS)
I think I've heard this before.
I think it's more than just wired.
I think these guys are about to make a move.
I think you mean to say, "get our asses down there, please," captain.
I thought he was supposed to be the smooth one.
I thought maybe they were, you know, pictures of your lover.
I told you already, I'm in the rubber business now, man.
I told you to secure a witness.
I wanna get back to my life the way it was. I'm tired.
I wanna lick 'em. (PHONE RINGING)
I wanna meet who whupped shaft's ass, that's what I wanna do.
I want motherfuckin' swimmin' ducks in here. Whoa, whoa.
I was gettin' 'em all in before you showed up.
I was gonna invite you guys.
I was gonna throw that out. I just want a new look.
I was just pausin'.
I was looking for my two keys of dope, and now I know where they are.
I watched them shoot her like she was nothing.
I will knock you the fuck out!
I won't be long. Oh, it's legal.
I wouldn't be buyin' shit from Denny's. I don't like the way we been treated.
I'd actually take that as a compliment if I didn't know you so well.
I'd have dunked it on your ass.
I'd like to squeeze your little fuckin' head, you bastard.
I'll be back.
I'll bust your ass too!
I'll do anything you want.
I'll kill you if you stop running!
I'll scratch whatever you want me to, you blue eyed bitch!
I'll sit down for, you know, for a minute.
I'll tell you what I know. I don't know everything.
I'm a (GAGGING) I'm gonna
I'm a narcotics cop.
I'm all right. Why don't we catch up later?
I'm always takin' it for you, right? Do it for me.
I'm cool, man. Don't need no help. Please, back up.
I'm Eddie. To the Al Capone suite.
I'm fine. I had a run in with Jim brown over here, but I'm fine.
I'm gettin' tired of this witness, man.
I'm getting really tired of this.
I'm getting the hang of this whole marksman shit,
I'm goin' home to my wife to get my quality time.
I'm gonna ask you one more time.
I'm gonna fill your lyin' ass full of hot shit.
I'm gonna need you to look through some mug shots until you can identify Max's shooter.
I'm gonna tell you like this. You splatter his ass, he's no good to us!
I'm keeping your sweet little friend for four hours until I make my deal.
I'm married. That's what married means.
I'm not a fucking chemistry teacher, Elliot.
I'm not askin' you to get into any wild shit. Just call me if you hear somethin'.
I'm not goin' down for you killin' jojo, the tire man!
I'm not kidding about this being Capone's. He had the place...
I'm not lettin' you in until you do!
I'm not rigid. I'm (MUMBLING) comfortable.
I'm not tryin' to lose my job on this one.
I'm on my way. I'm gonna see if I can find Lowrey.
I'm sorry, but damn that.
I'm straight like a board. Like an arrow. I'm so straight right now it's sick.
I'm tellin' you, man. I'm straight, man.
I'm tellin' you. Ain't nobody doin' none of that.
I'm the first guy through the door and the last guy to leave the crime scene,
I'm tired of you talkin' that stuff. You wanna fight me.
I'm watchin' out for the bad boys.
I'm with ya.
I'm... Julie.
I've been there.
I've never really shot a gun before, and that's sort of all that,
I've tried three times. I just can't get in.
If his wife could find us, I'm a lot better off on my own.
If I get killed, I'm fuckin' you up!
If I recall correctly, the last couple dead bad guys belonged to you.
If I'm wrong about this, you can fire my ass.
If that ain't enough, I'm gonna run you in for extortion.
If two people were alone no, not with a guy like that.
If you have to be Mike Lowrey, Santa claus, f.D. Hutton, I don't give a shit.
If you were a real cop, in the field, working every day,
Ignore this. This is one of my freaks, Yvette.
In case I'm wrong, check them out.
In my pocket 'cause that's where it was,
Invite? Looks like I'm catering this.
Is Chet ringin' the oh! Baby
Is he always like this on a stakeout?
Is that our guy? Where's the girl? That's him.
It doesn't help, you going around shellacking it in with furniture Polish.
It get stuck.
It is a vegetable. Lot of salt in pickle?
It means you sleep together, but you can't get none.
It probably had a name.
It really doesn't matter anymore.
It was new year's Eve, and my ex boyfriend, Eddie,
It was orders, baby. Listen. It was orders.
It's 'cause I'm glad we survived. (CHUCKLES) Shit!
It's $105,000 and this happens to be...
It's a cop thing. Yeah, these pictures are up here for every time he save my life.
It's a favor for Mike Lowrey. Oh, right, the cop...
It's a federal subpoena. What am I gonna do, tell them no?
It's a shiny dick with two chairs in it.
It's a undercover car, okay? Undercover.
It's been very nice doing business with you.
It's conga. Don't be so stupid. Because it's desi
It's Conrad. I'm callin' in a favor.
It's cool. I just (GAGGING)
It's cool. You look great!
It's Eddie here. (LAUGHING POLITELY)
It's ether! It'll explode, you dope!
It's funny how you could just laugh at that.
It's funny that you ask me, because you know, I was gonna be a cop.
It's gonna be a day or two before I can get fletch out.
It's gonna be all right. Hey, Mike's to the rescue.
It's gonna be one or the other! It's gonna be him or us!
It's honest money. I'm a second generation rich kid.
It's just baloney. My baloney has a first name.
It's just unexpected, that's all.
It's not about the french fry! It's about your
It's not like that.
It's not like that. Sure, sure.
It's not what it looks like, okay? Hear what I'm sayin'.
It's okay. I'm with the police.
It's one guy, really. It's only one guy.
It's the same thing with him. You go to his place, ain't nothin' but pictures of me.
It's time to get lucky.
Jesus Christ! Who the hell was that?
Jesus! Are you serious?
Jojo, this is a lot of dope. Who could cut it real quick?
Jojo, we're not playin', man. Huh?
Jojo. What's up?
Jojo... (COCKS GUN) I got 15 bullets in this gun.
Julie, it's me.
Julie, one drink. One sip. Hey, what's the whispering about?
Julie!
Julie! Listen. No way! I
Julie? Yeah.
Julie. (SNIFFING)
Julie. All right. Julie, yeah. Hi.
Just do what you do, only faster.
Just entertainment. Hi. I'm Max.
Just girl chat. Where's the bathroom?
Just let me know if you get anything, all right?
Just punch it, man! Go!
Keep goin'!
Lack of respect for other people's property!
Lack of trust in this relationship.
Leave me and Mrs. Burnett alone for
Leave me the fuck alone. Seriously.
Let me give you a broad stroke of the place.
Let me tell you how bad a day you're havin'. You're jackin' a couple of cops.
Let me tell you somethin'. This witness? It's the only good news I got.
Let's bring it up! Bring it up!
Let's do what we came to do and get the fuck outta here. Simple.
Let's go.
Let's go. I got this.
Like the leftovers the hooves, you know, stomach lining,
Lis
Listen to me. Your only function in life right now is to find that person.
Listen, I've just seen my best friend get murdered,
Listen, listen. Mike, I'll make it up to you.
Listen, Max, we gotta talk. Is there someplace we can go?
Little red tags on 'em? 'Bout so high?
Long time no see. I'm cool.
Look at it. Your dogs.
Look at this shit. Is this what you want?
Look at this. "Animal tested. Animal tested."
Look at this. You see this guy? He's dead, right?
Look at ya. Look at ya. Can you stay focused?
Look here. I need a full file on Eddie dominguez.
Look how he crawls around on the leather.
Look, baby, okay? Mm mmm.
Look, cap'n. This whole situation is gettin' out of control.
Look, I'll stay at the house with Theresa and the kids.
Look, lady, I'm not playin', okay? You really pissin' me off.
Look, lady.
Look, man, I ain't got no trust fund.
Look, man, I'm gonna check all calls to the room.
Look, man. We'll get the witness, and we damn sure gonna get the fools who did this.
Look, Marcus, I got a dead madam, I got a concussion and I got a real bad headache.
Look, there's no signs of forced entry.
Look, they got the girl. We need to get them now.
Looking for new girls in town.
Looks like our buddy arrona was a bit of a gambler. Got dog track, jai alai.
Looks like we got two shades of lipstick over here, gentlemen.
Lucille ball was a bimbo. What are you talkin' about?
Lucy was the Queen, baby. Think about it.
Maggots. Man, uh
Major, major ill shit happened down at the p.D.
Man, I been your partner for six years,
Man, I'm hey, no. I was playin'.
Man, it was just it was fuckin' I don't know.
Man, what is this havin' a picnic shit in my car?
Marcus, I just got one question for you, bro.
Marcus, I thought you said you loved me. Show me love!
Marcus, what are you doing?
Marcus, why don't you stop playin', man?
Marcus! You're gone! I'm outta here!
Marcus? I got the red one on. You have on the red one?
Marcus. Get over here. (SHOES SKIDDING)
Max just dropped by. I gotta go. Bye.
Maybe you're on to something. Let's pay for this.
Me and my partner, we're gonna go to club hell...
Me and my team, we've had a big week, so just get the fuck out of the car.
Me and you. Me and you.
Mi Mike Lowrey place. You right. Whew.
Miami police! Freeze! I am the police!
Mike, he's a special guy. Boy, that Mike is special.
Mike, let's go!
Mike!
Mike! Help! Out!
Mike's gonna stay here with you and the kids,
Mm hmm. Hang out. Here you go. Hang out?
Mmm. Come on now. Mm mmm.
Mom! Mom!
Mommy! Daddy! Daddy! Hey, boy! What's up?
Mornin', I got a power ranger stuck up my ass.
Motherfucker!
Move and you're a dead man! Motherfu
Move her! Get her in!
Move your ass! You got it, babe.
Move your wide ass!
Move!
Move! Go!
Mr. Lowrey told me you got a baby factory goin' on at your house. Is that true?
Mr. Lowrey's not here. He's out. He said I could use his place tonight.
My bad, man. I ain't had no quality time.
My bad. It's cool, man.
My man. Oh, I'm sorry. Hey!
My pla yeah! No! My place yeah, my place is shit.
My shit always works sometimes!
My wife done kicked me out the house. Kicked me out of happy home.
Nah, I'm not talkin' to no it's a term you use, baby. "Screw you" is a cop term.
Nah, it'll be 10:30, 11:00 before I get in.
Nah, man. There's too much bass in your voice.
Nah, that's not it.
Never fuck with a cop's family, asshole.
Next time, learn how to work the safety with your punk ass!
Nice runnin' into you, jojo.
Nice to meet you, Max.
Nice to meet you. You too.
No gunshots, no dead bodies.
No way! I told you I am not going into protective custody.
No way.
No, baby, your daddy just wishes he was in Cleveland.
No, but don't call my place no zoo. Listen, listen. Francine, please.
No, but I ain't goin' out like that. Don't take nobody that long to get in bed.
No, come on, Mike. Put it back in. I cannot believe you took it out.
No, damn the jokes. Damn 'em.
No, I got her. What do you know about shootin'?
No, I like having you live with me.
No, it's another murder case, you twerp.
No, man.
No, man. That's what they got windows for. We can peek in. Yeah, that should do it.
No, no, no, no, no, baby.
No, no, no, no. I saw it on the news.
No, no. No. No, it's two guys.
No, now, uh you you you don't want that.
No, scratch that. Everybody in the damn unit will be out of a job.
No, see, it's not that kinda day, okay?
No, y y y you not listenin'. It's not registerin', okay?
No. (CHUCKLES) See, there ain't gonna be no next.
No. Easy. (SMOOTHLY) Mike Lowrey.
No. I cannot believe he wore his afro that big.
No. Turn the page, girl. I done already seen it.
Nobody does my baby! Ahh! Marcus
Nobody now give you no break
Northeast. Keep goin' northeast.
Not a big up side for you there. Oh, come on.
Not a problem.
Not even you idren now give you no breaks
Not now. I told you to play by the rules.
Not to shoot up a neighborhood! Not to do another dead body!
Now back up, put the gun down...
Now give me a motherfuckin' handiwipe.
Now if we get this witness to I.D. The shooters, maybe we catch our bad guys.
Now is real good, jojo. Yeah. This is on me too.
Now let's hear one of those jokes, bitch.
Now listen to me. Hear me.
Now that you mention it, Mr. Lowrey did mention you coming by tonight.
Now that's how you s'posed to drive!
Now this is what I need.
Now you're in fuckin' trouble!
O'fee's gonna be all right, but he's got nothin' to tell us.
Off this fuckin' Cliff, you keep fuckin' with me.
Officer down. Respond code three.
Oh, but don't worry. They tend to think Mike Lowrey gonna be all right.
Oh, damn. Sorry.
Oh, dead bodies.
Oh, don't make this hard, Jo!
Oh, fuck!
Oh, God! My God! Go! Go! Go!
Oh, goddamn it!
Oh, great. It's the goon squad.
Oh, how sweet. Does that make you union?
Oh, I'm cool.
Oh, let's go see if little Duke is gonna be okay, shall we?
Oh, look. Oh! Look. I tripped.
Oh, man Julie, sweetie, you
Oh, my God, you got a baby seat in the back.
Oh, no, I could. You talkin' like it's over.
Oh, nothing. Just hanging out, handcuffed to steering wheels.
Oh, please, like shit don't happen when you're there.
Oh, sh
Oh, shit!
Oh, shit! I'm fucked.
Oh, shit! Please, catch that motherfucker who shot me!
Oh, that's just great.
Oh, that's right. You ain't gettin' none at home. You got extra energy.
Oh, that's... sweet.
Oh, there's a headline Sinclair's gonna love.
Oh, this is good. Noah's chasin' us!
Oh, this is my friend Julie.
Oh, we beatin' him down. We beatin' him down!
Oh, yeah, well, you know, he's my man.
Oh, yeah? Well, I'm a stand up comedian, and I suck!
Oh, you know, I wanted to. Captain Howard said, you know, I'm irresponsible.
Oh, you, um, dressed? Hi.
Oh, you, you, you the man! You the fucking man tonight!
Oh! I forgot! The bad guys probably know where you live.

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