Barbershop (2002) Edit

A couple more years, I'm gonna retire, and I'm gonna move to Arizona.

A licensed, professional barber.

A little? Man, every time you go home, I think I'm in a drive by.

A scallop is a shellfish.

A style coach. Pimp.

A two time loser.

Actually, it's pretty good.

Actually, that's a love poem...

Ain't gonna be around here that long.

Ain't nothing to see here.

Ain't that right?

Al Jolson in a FUBU hat. Blackface for the new millennium.

All I know is, he can pack and stand his ass on that corner all he want to.

All I need is some cocoa butter. I can get that. Excuse me, player.

All I'm saying is, I done had a change of heart.

All it need is a little paint and a tune up, 'cause it backfires just about that much.

All right, fellas, I'm free. Who's next? Not me.

All right, here we go, baby!

All right, I don't know exactly what I'm trying to say, but...

All right, man, let's see it.

All right, this is what we going to do.

All right? Let me look at this.

All right.

All right.

All right.

All right.

All right. Hey, what can you do?

All right. I'll see you in.

All right. Thank you, Mr. Wallace. Okay.

Am I all right?

And a grant that you used on your other businesses.

And a lot better.

And after last night...

And all he did was give away free haircuts. Now they want freebies.

And all them folk up in there, hippity hoppity nonsense...

And by the end of the day, I will know something.

And can we please try and teach our kids something other than a Chronic album?

And despite what you may think...

And don't hate me 'cause I'm trying to make something of myself.

And don't know nothing. Let me. Sir, you mind?

And frustrated...

And gotta worry 'bout this fool trying to shank you.

And have nothing.

And he can't stand you, but he'll give you a Job as a favor to me.

And he on the bus now.

And I ain't never seen nobody in your chair.

And I damn sure wouldn't be out here freezing my balls off.

And I got the picture to prove it.

And I lined him up in this chair...

And I must admit I like it.

And I want nobody in here to drink it.

And I want you to see what the word on the street is.

And I'll get the paperwork to you next week.

And if I had the money, I'd tip you guys myself.

And it's a five bedroom, four and a half bath...

And orange extract. The extra foam in a separate cup.

And pay your mama some rent.

And she know Martin Luther King, and they got a lot of publicity.

And the card...

And the rest of us are doing what? Biding our time?

And then I was here in '77...

And then we got to get us out of it?

And then, with a straight face...

And they bussing in white kids, and bussing out little black kids like you.

And they got thrown in Jail, and they did it way before Rosa did!

And they traced it back to me.

And this ain't no supermarket, so I'm gonna tell Mama.

And three, Rosa Parks ain't do nothing but sit her black ass down.

And throw away the bail money, all the money I put up for you.

And we get paid.

And when you do get out, I'm going to be long gone!

And whether you like it or not, I'm gonna be like this tomorrow.

And you ain't allowing me to do it.

And you better have my money.

And you can get some trim.

And you don't even have the $20,000 I gave you this morning?

And you got to give it up to Rosa Parks, period.

And you said she... Ho!

And you the reason why. That's what I'm going to do.

And you wanna know why? Why?

And you'll find out that I'm the only friend you got.

And, if it doesn't work out, you know, you can always just go work for my uncle.

And, please, black people, be on time...

And, you know, I crept up outta there.

Answered, done deal. Come on, let me buy you some apple juice.

Anything that's extra, they just clip it off. Come on.

Anyway, I do find it amusing that the people...

Apparently, neither can lndian folks. Give me! Move!

Are you stupid, simple or slow? Which one?

As a black man, I got my pride and my dignity.

As in, your third strike?

As soon as I get somebody, rent out the studio, make a platinum CD...

Ask him.

Ass is like money. You can never have too much.

Ass so big, it look like two midgets in a sleeping bag!

At the barbershop. All day?

At the end of the day, I was glad I was here.

Attitude will put you on. Confidence.

Baby, you have no idea how proud I am of you.

Baby....

Barbershop.

Be gone, Mandingo. Kevin.

Be right back.

Because it's a mollusk.

Because nobody in here want to be a barber...

Because that's what I'm gonna buy for my baby.

Because they was deep, and they was on the front line in the '60s.

Before it comes to your dinner plate...

Before you know it, everybody'll be walking around with a patch in their head.

Between a woman with a big ass and a big ass woman.

Big ass woman!

Big C, what's wrong, dude?

Billy, come on. No, man, he do this all the time!

Billy, stop this car, man!

Billy!

Billy!

Bitch!

Black folks ought to boycott Arizona...

Black people supposed to be getting some money called reparations.

Black Picasso of the ghetto! Barber's a respectable occupation.

Bless her.

Both my babies.

Boy, they sure know how to kill a man's dreams.

Boy, what's wrong with you?

Braiding your hair, sucker!

Bring that nothing on. Come on.

Bring your ass back over here! Lucky I ain't got my Jordans on!

Brother!

But can I go change my drawers first? Because they sticking to me.

But he turned it down.

But he was rich...

But I can't sell my shop to you.

But I promise you that I'll get you all your money back.

But I'd be willing to call off the whole deal...

But if Geronimo keeps on, somebody's liable to bust a cap in his ass, right?

But if you don't pay the property taxes, the bank is gonna foreclose on the shop.

But in front of y'all, I'll speak my mind.

But it just hard enough, you sitting there trying to cut some head...

But it takes respect to get respect. Understand?

But let me tell you something. At the end of the day....

But she damn sure ain't special.

But sit her black ass down.

But sometimes I think...

But the problem with y'all cats today...

But when you're at the barbershop, you keep your mouth shut.

But you know what I'm here for. I want my shop back.

But you only gave me $20,000.

But you understand, it wasn't just money. $5, player?

But you're a better businessman. You got vision.

But your father, he believed in something, Cal.

But your words were just the reminder I needed.

But your words were kind.

But, listen. Your grandfather opened this shop.

But, Lord willing...

But, you know...

By a man named Pablo Neruda.

By someone who don't know no better...

Cal, you could have told us.

Call the cops, then. You better...

Call the cops, then. You better...

Calvin went out on a limb for you with this Job, man.

Calvin wouldn't give me a chair if I couldn't cut heads.

Calvin, I need a cut like Ronnie's last week.

Calvin, I'm glad you called me back.

Calvin, Lester Wallace wears a hairpiece.

Calvin, please. Calvin, don't do this.

Calvin, what are you doing? Hey, baby.

Calvin, what that boy name?

Calvin, you got that candy? I want a Now and Later!

Calvin, you know I want to help you.

Calvin, your father would have hooked me up.

Calvin, your father wouldn't put up with this mess. You have to handle this.

Calvin!

Calvin? Are you all right?

Calvin. Hey, baby.

Calvin...

Can I show you something? Yes.

Can we talk about something other than big, fat, Juicy asses, please?

Can we talk in the back?

Can you believe Shaka Zulu? Listen!

Can you guys stop arguing for once?

Can you help me with this shoe?

Can you see all right? I'll watch out on this side.

Can't get it up?

Can't leave here without it. Simple and plain.

Can't nobody run this shop like you, boy. For real, man.

Case closed.

Check it out.

Checker Fred, just sit there and play checkers.

Clap them. Stomp them!

Clean you up or something?

Close the door, dog!

College boy.

Come here!

Come here.

Come in the back? That's my girl.

Come on get in! Throw it up in there!

Come on man. We found that!

Come on, Billy, bring your ass back over here.

Come on, dog! Don't do me like that, Calvin!

Come on, I got it, dog. It just went out. I can start it again.

Come on, man, Cal, I'm just selling my phones, man.

Come on, man, this thing heavy, dog.

Come on, man! What you doing?

Come on, man. I lost my head.

Come on, man. This thing heavy.

Come on, Mr. Wallace.

Come on, player. What'd he say, man?

Come on, player. Come on, big man.

Come on, Stedman.

Come on, what you gonna give me for it?

Come on! Billy! Give it to me! Billy, get.

Come on! What you got on me?

Come on.

Come on.

Come on. Oh, yeah.

Come on. Okay.

Come on. Hold on.

Come on. I got some time. Come on, real quick.

Come on. We're about to get paid, baby!

Come on. Your drop.

Come over here. You got to see this. You're missing it!

Come to Daddy!

Condoms.

Congratulations on your new Job, man.

Cornerstone of neighborhood!

Could change the way a man felt on the inside.

Courage? What you going do?

Cut me somebody up in here.

Cutlass Sierra?

Damn, my phone's ringing.

Damn, speaking of ****stan....

Damn!

Damn!

Damn!

Damn!

Damn!

Damn! Open this door!

Damn. I mean, man, your foot's Jacked up.

Damn. Well, my bad.

Damn. You need a Band Aid, man. I'm going to go get that for you.

Diarrhea, my ass. I ain't got to worry about you.

Did you drink my apple juice?

Did you know you get on my nerves?

Did you see me drink it? I didn't have to, you asked about it.

Did you see me drink it? I don't care.

Did you? lnquiring minds want to know.

Dinka, boma ye!

Dinka, Eddie. Dinka.

Dinka. What're they saying?

Do I have to draw you a picture? No.

Do I look like Barry Sanders? Do I look like Lawrence Taylor?

Do I look like I'm thinking about somebody else?

Do I look like my father? Yeah.

Do you and nothing need a ride? Yeah.

Do you have ocular proof? Did you see me?

Don't be scared. I'm free. I'll cut your hair.

Don't go out and buy a Range Rover when you living with your mama.

Don't go there with that.

Don't ignore me like that.

Don't ignore me.

Don't look at me.

Don't make me run these clippers up your ass.

Don't make me smack you. I told you once.

Don't make you better than no one.

Don't mean anything? Let me tell you something, boy.

Don't oh me! Jimmy, I knew it was you! That's why I spit in it.

Don't play with me, Kevin. Where is she?

Don't put your finger in my... Leave.

Don't touch my apple juice, or there will be repercussions.

Don't worry about him no more.

Don't worry about it.

Don't worry, I'll get back at you. Let me get him squared away.

Don't you ever do that shit again man. Are you crazy?

Don't you mean seniority?

Don't, shh me.

Drink to that, baby.

DVDs, CDs.

Eddie, can I talk to you, man? Eddie?

Eddie, how do we know that's really Payton?

Eddie, what you doing, man?

Eddie. What?

Either that or go see Eddie.

Either that, or I go back to India.

Everybody here would love to get a handout.

Everybody up in here knows this.

Everything here but this barbershop.

Everything you needed I got for you.

Everywhere you look, there's opportunity. You know what I mean?

Excuse me, dog.

Excuse me. I don't want your cooties.

Fade away, boo yah!

Fellows, what's up?

First get your shop open. Then start the rumors.

First thing I'm gonna do, get a tattoo.

Five minutes.

Flushed down the drain...

Fool almost messed up my part.

For driving drunk and being pulled over in a Hyundai.

For one brief, embarrassing moment, I chose to give up.

For something other than free before 11:00 at the club.

For the rest of their life.

For what?

Forget about the cash.

Forty years.

Fred, do not get this fool started on Martin Luther King!

From the heel, dog. Let the toe go.

Fuck! Who the hell is Malcolm Brown?

Gabby, who'll take care of you? My mama.

Gabby!

Gave them the opportunity to be somebody!

Get away from my shop! Get away!

Get away from my store!

Get him on out of here.

Get him up and get him out.

Get it.

Get on!

Get out and get it! Why I got to get out to get it?

Get out of here, man. You ain't right, Calvin, you ain't right, man.

Get out of here! Go on!

Get out of my office.

Get the goddamn chain! Come on, man!

Get them dogs out of here. You like dogs.

Get this phone from me, two for one. The last one didn't work.

Get up against the wall! Hold up, man, my foot!

Get up!

Get up! I dare you!

Get your ass here. Leave the boys alone! Sit your old ass down!

Get your foam nice and lathery.

Girl, it's not like a bottle of Hennessey or nothing!

Girl, you got a great future behind you.

Give it to me. Let me.

Give it up! Now you're talking!

Giving out money wouldn't do nothing. Look at Hammer.

Go get hooked up.

Go home! Just go home. It's over.

Go home.

Go on, get out of the room there, girl!

Go on!

Go!

Going home. I'm never coming in this shop again. I work for me.

Gonna get my blade.

Good morning.

Good night.

Good to have you here in Chicago. Welcome to the Bulls.

Good to see you, thanks for coming. Yes, indeed.

Got him looking like 101 DaImatians.

Got me feeling all gentle.

Got that little boy looking like a leopard.

Got the nerve to want to be somebody.

Got the shoes.

Got them shoes!

Gotta call some backup for us.

Grandma, did you say something? Grandma don't see or hear too good.

Grandma.

Guarantees I won't spend my life behind bars.

Have some respect and decency for other people's stuff.

He ain't from here, I know that.

He ain't going to cause no problem around here.

He ain't gonna win in the South Side, either.

He believed and understood...

He comes from a broken home. He don't even know his mama.

He cut a patch in the back of my head.

He don't boil his ribs. I like them.

He freaking everything and everybody!

He had to get that faded a little bit. So, I just....

He handed it down to your father, who left it to you.

He knows what to say.

He let all those barbers in there use their station whenever they wanted to...

He needs little spots all around. Look at him!

He owes me $5 from a crap game.

He was a fashion expert.

He was a Jew.

He wasn't going shoot nobody. He had on leather pants.

He's just a businessman from the street.

He's not Arab, he's not Mexican, he's not Eskimo. He is from ****stan.

He's not crippled. He's cute. Tell his mama to set me up.

He's supposed to pay.

Heard you just bought Big CarI's Auto Shop. Left everything the same.

Heard you just bought Big CarI's Auto Shop. Left everything the same.

Heavens, no. Who would tell you such a thing?

Hell, no, man. What?

Hell. Give me that, let me!

Hello?

Her act led to the movement and everything...

Her husband caught her in a prime hoochie koochie with another man!

Here come Jumbo Mutumbo!

Here go your money back. I'm putting it right here on the table for you.

Here. ls that what you want?

Here's a little something extra for Johnnie's shoe fund. Take care.

Hey, babe, me and her, mostly me, I tell you!

Hey, baby. Excuse me, brother.

Hey, Billy, take it down.

Hey, boo. This is just too much. Hi.

Hey, Calvin. What's up man?

Hey, Checkers. You got them?

Hey, did you hear...

Hey, don't drop the soap!

Hey, don't you make me....

Hey, Eddie!

Hey, Grandma.

Hey, hey! Slow down right here. Slow down.

Hey, hold up... Why'd you touch my apple juice?

Hey, honeybun.

Hey, hook me up, Cal.

Hey, how you doing, Detective? What's going on across the street?

Hey, how you doing, Mr. Wallace?

Hey, I got ask you a question. Who this?

Hey, Jimmy. Yo.

Hey, Lamar.

Hey, Lamar. Don't bring your skinny ass back.

Hey, man, I shouldn't have disrespected you like that, in front of everybody.

Hey, man. Calvin.

Hey, Rick.

Hey, Ricky.

Hey, Ricky. Just the man I want to see.

Hey, slow down.

Hey, Terri.... What?

Hey, that ain't even necessary right there!

Hey, this is my grandmama's oxygen machine.

Hey, what the helI's wrong with you?

Hey, what's up, big guy? What's up, player?

Hey, what's up, J.D.?

Hey, yo, brother! Get out!

Hey, yo, listen up, everybody.

Hey, yo, Rick, hold up!

Hey, you have any idea who poked that hole in Samir's store?

Hey!

Hey! Hey, girl!

Hey! Come on! Come on!

Hey! Did you hear about Clarinda?

Hey! Get back!

Hold it, Mr. Wallace.

Hold it. There's plenty of fat brothers pulling good ass.

Hold on a second, baby.

Hold on, listen. Yo, Fred.

Hold on, man!

Hold on, now, Seinfeld.

Hold on, player. Wait!

Hold on.

Hold still.

Hold tight, Lester, you got bigger problems than that, dog.

Hold tight, man. What you trying to say?

Hold tight.

Hold tight. It's mathematics, cuz.

Hold up, now, Fred.

Hold up. What you mean, call the police?

Honey, cover your face now.

Hook me up.

Hook that up for me. You got any money, Lamar?

How are you doing, Mr. Wallace?

How can you sit there with all that chicken and not offer us any?

How come he can eat out front, while we... 'Cause Eddie's old, man.

How come you up here like you the police?

How could you sell this place? I met you here.

How did we get out of that?

How did you do this for 40 years?

How is he gonna call himself a man of God?

How is it my fault, and I'm just trying to better myself?

How many times I told you not to come in here soliciting?

How much I owe you for this? No. Put your money away.

How much them roses cost? $2 or $3?

How the white man got his foot on your neck.

How the white man got his foot on your neck.

How you doing, Mr. Wallace? How you doing?

How you doing? Fine. How you doing?

How you going do that to me? I been coming here for years.

How you think Captain Kirk got all that booty?

How's Jennifer? She getting big.

I actually sold it to Lester Wallace.

I ain't do nothing!

I ain't messing with that fool no more.

I ain't paying your ass nothing!

I ain't playing games, baby.

I ain't pretending to be someone I saw on TV.

I appreciate everybody in here.

I appreciate everything you guys do for the shop.

I appreciate you coming by. I really do.

I been calling you all day about the bumper.

I believe they were, Stay strong, brother.

I bet that you all didn't even know Jesus wasn't a Christian.

I bet you I would hide a woman under that bed.

I bought some more apple juice.

I can live with that.

I can't believe you got someone.

I can't believe you sold your father's shop. Jennifer....

I can't do this no more. Do what?

I can't just let you take it and turn it into some strip club.

I can't put that on my lot, man. I got a reputation to think about.

I did not, I did not keep moving.

I didn't do it.

I didn't hear that. You heard me, Bourgie Banton.

I didn't mean that, man. Just pack up.

I didn't mean that. See, I want you.

I didn't mind 'cause you was good in bed.

I didn't move my head! lt's not my fault!

I do want... Out! Clown!

I don't believe this. Why?

I don't care! Hey, dog, whup her ass.

I don't hate cheese toast just 'cause I'm eating...

I don't have to see you... What'd you see?

I don't know what they doing here.

I don't know what y'all say, I ain't taking reparations.

I don't know, a real picture?

I don't know.

I don't know.

I don't need Oprah's house.

I don't see Lester's car.

I don't tell you how to run your business over there. Anyway....

I don't think I know everything, I'm saying that being educated...

I don't touch nobody else's stuff

I don't understand. He said he sold the shop, Dinka.

I don't want him back in the shop no more.

I don't want it! Shut up! I got a Job to do!

I don't want to hear that. What's up, man?

I done told you twice. Come on.

I figured not. You mind just trimming me up a little bit?

I figured you'd make a case for how slavery got y'all oppressed...

I got an announcement to make.

I got diarrhea. Diarrhea? If you done messed up...

I got news for you, white boy. You're not black.

I got plenty of customers. You just come on the wrong day.

I got some eggs for you. You better come on and get 'em.

I got that plate number.

I got the Job.

I gotta do my own thing.

I had all day to think about it.

I had him shaking like Don Knotts in a card game or something.

I had this opportunity to get this Job last month.

I had to do something to get the monkey off our back. That's what I did.

I had to use it help my man Ricky get out of Jail.

I hear that Evander Holyfield gonna put a Red Lobster in a church.

I heard they circumcise women, too. How you gonna do that?

I heard, on BET, we supposed to make some money.

I hope I never make a woman that angry.

I just bought it!

I just don't understand why someone would drive into the store like that.

I just realized today that this was something worth saving.

I just see red sauce on everything.

I just want to say from the bottom of my heart, that...

I knew it. Get that flashlight out of my face!

I know it wasn't me. I'm lactose intolerant.

I know some of the customers don't leave tips like they supposed to.

I know you are not talking to me about how to run my shop.

I know you heard that.

I lead. You follow.

I like cutting hair.

I lost the shop.

I love you, boo.

I love you. Bullshit.

I mean, can't you see that?

I mean, if we can't talk straight in a barbershop...

I mean, look at you. You have hung in there.

I mean, why you want to play him like that?

I messed up bad.

I messed up, Eddie.

I might even take over this shop if Calvin don't give it to his son.

I need $20.

I need to say something.

I never knew money could be so heavy.

I paid for this.

I probably won't ever even go to school, but I'm gonna do something with my life.

I probably wouldn't say this in front of white folk.

I put a big ass red... Terri! Stop cussing!

I put a big red sign saying:

I rebuild. I fix the store, and I stay right here.

I remember the last thing we were talking about was Linda from Parkview...

I said I didn't have to see you drink it... Oh, shit.

I said I'm not messing with my crazy ass cousin no more. He too violent.

I said, Linda is a ho!

I said, she a ho! No!

I said, the machine broke!

I sat on a bus and got thrown in Jail, and ain't hear from nobody in a whole week.

I should thank you.

I sold the barbershop.

I still don't understand.

I swear to God, I'm not trying to vex you. I don't even know what that mean.

I tell you, the first thing I'll do, Joe.

I think Chicago PD might have a problem with this ATM machine...

I thought you said go. I did not say go!

I told you I used to work here, player. That's used to, J.D.

I told you to keep still... I got a patch on my head!

I told you, I'll get you your money back, but only $20,000.

I told you, I'm a man of my word.

I want a grande, triple non fat, half decaf...

I want you to be inconspicuous.

I was beginning to think you don't like Lester.

I was here in '68 when they robbed and burned down...

I was here in '74, when desegregation started...

I was hoping you'd do the same thing here.

I was just looking at these!

I was wondering, was you still interested in what we talked about the other day?

I was wondering...

I was young. I didn't know.

I will if I want to. If Tony Roma can make ribs better...

I wish the money in it was mine.

I worked a double last night. I Just got home two hours ago.

I would've whupped him last week. Why you think I was chasing him? What....

I wouldn't have gave half these bail Jumpers the opportunity.

I, on the other hand, am an overweight barber from West Africa...

I'd be spared the sight of seeing everything that we worked for...

I'd use that money, I'd take my girl out to a real nice dinner, like Red Lobster.

I'll do you next.

I'll get you good! I'm gonna get you real good!

I'll have my own mural, my own shop.

I'll have to spoon it on myself because y'all never get it right.

I'll manage bank payments, as discussed.

I'll see you then.

I'll show you how to play some hardball!

I'll show you how to play.

I'll show you something that's gonna make you much happier.

I'll slap you. Don't get on my bad side. You've been here just a minute.

I'll support you. You know that.

I'll take it.

I'll whup her ass. No, man, don't do that.

I'll whup into you like that, boy.

I'm actually.... I applaud your virtuosity.

I'm all right. Hey, what happened across the street?

I'm all right. You sure?

I'm being real nice right now.

I'm big boned, Rick, hefty, rotund.

I'm blacker than you, and in your best day, you could never be me.

I'm busy. I don't want to see Eddie.

I'm calling the cops on you two!

I'm calling the cops!

I'm cool, man. Forget you.

I'm Crazy Howard.

I'm curious, man.

I'm feeling to go get some fish.

I'm getting a headache. I just paid you $10!

I'm going to back you up on that, 'cause he was on the bus back in the day.

I'm going to get some 25s.

I'm going to take this to my grandmama's house.

I'm gonna call your mom and tell her what happened!

I'm gonna get my barbershop back.

I'm gonna get your black ass.

I'm gonna give her just due for what she did.

I'm gonna have me a business. I'm opening up a shop.

I'm gonna pay you back. I got a Job interview.

I'm good.

I'm just saying, being educated means you have opportunities.

I'm just saying... Who you talking about?

I'm just trying to get him clean like them Gillette commercials.

I'm never coming in this shop again.

I'm not gonna work my ass off for that.

I'm not here.

I'm not taking his side. Ask the man.

I'm on this convenience store thing, so somebody's getting locked up.

I'm only saying he's a cripple.

I'm part of this shop, too, man.

I'm sick of this! You want some of this?

I'm sorry about any misunderstanding, or...

I'm sorry, ma'am, it wasn't my fault. He kept moving, so...

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm surprised to hear that.

I'm taIking about that smash and grab with that ATM the other night.

I'm talking to my lady.

I'm talking to you, dog!

I'm telling you, they got about $15,000 or $20,000 in that ATM.

I've been getting my hair cut here since I was a kid.

I've got it now.

I've gotta think how. The same way we stole it, the truck.

I've told you four times, that's Ricky.

If he can't be the best, he can go to hell, too.

If he ever made the mistake of disrespecting her.

If he owed you money, you'd be chasing him, too.

If he says yeah, kick his ass, if he says no, then squash it.

If I led you on in any kind of way, I'm sorry...

If I thought you did it, I would have never bailed you out.

If I'm going to lose my shop, I just don't want to lose it this way.

If it's a studio, fine.

If you can't make the payments...

If you done messed up this room... Ain't nobody messed up your room.

If you gonna look....

If you got a problem with that...

If you take this money, that's as good as a contract.

If you were to get me my money by, say...

In my day, a barber was a counselor.

India? I thought you were from ****stan.

Is gonna yield a 40 inch ass.

Is Mr. Wallace in there? He here.

Is that not respirations? Is that respirations?

Is that she was a secretary at the NAACCP...

Is that that punk Jay?

Is that...

Is this a barbershop? Yes, it is.

Is this chair free?

It ain't even a shellfish.

It ain't even about the money. It's the principle.

It don't look that bad. Yes, it does.

It don't make no sense.

It got a chrome rocker panel?

It got two shells wrapped around it, just like a clam.

It had not even been loaded yet.

It just showed up, and then it was gone.

It look like Malcolm Brown car.

It run.

It was a whole lot of black folk sat down on buses...

It will.

It's 7:00. You gonna be late for work. You better come on.

It's always something on a Saturday, isn't it?

It's because of him.

It's been in my family too long.

It's closing for good.

It's cool.

It's gonna be called The Barbershop. I'll keep that same theme going.

It's just some funky ass apple juice. This is my funky ass apple juice.

It's like I said, I ain't going nowhere.

It's me, J.D.

It's my fault? Let me hear you say it. It's my fault?

It's nice down there.

It's not gonna happen.

It's not Oprah's house. It's Stedman's guesthouse...

It's okay. Take your time. Oh, my boo.

It's stupid.

It's the hottest thing on the street. All the youngsters asking me about it.

It's the ratio.

It's wrong and disrespectful for you to discuss Rosa Parks in that way.

J.D.

J.D. What?

J.D.!

J.D.?

Janelle called me and said that she saw Lester Wallace in here.

Jay! Come here, you punk!

Jennifer Lopez.

Jesse, Randy, Tito, Freddie, Action, I'll take them all on!

**** didn't get money, the Holocaust survivors got the money.

Jimmy drank your apple juice.

Jimmy will never touch your head again, I promise.

Jimmy, what are you doing?

Jimmy.

Just 'cause you go to some fancy college don't make you better than me.

Just a little edge on there. I don't cut hair for free. Out the door!

Just a splash of hazelnut.

Just drop me off at 79th.

Just general, all around hustler.

Just give me your wallet and your Jewelry, won't be no problem.

Just give us the money.

Just go on out, go.

Just hang out at the barbershop. You sure you can handle that?

Just playing with you, man. Relax.

Just right around the corner.

Just think about that Babyface song.

Keep the change.

Kevin, come open this door!

Kevin!

Knock his college ass out!

Know what? Jimmy got a point.

Lady, I don't care what it look like! It's my car.