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Home > Good Morning, Vietnam Soundboard
NSFW Audio: Use caution, some sounds may be offensive
A bar brawl that's one cronauer
A bird
A conviction on a charge of treason against the united states carries with it penalties kinda on the stiff side if you know what I mean
A friend
A khaki eclipse
A little conference here wilk a little conference time out everyone
A little of this whoo whoo whoo
A little too young for you
A lot of people went to the mat for you
A man does not refer to pat boone as a beautiful genius if things are all right
A man with limp damaged hair but nevertheless a fireball
A very well hung chihuahua
Absolutely not
Actually it's a ray conniff featurette three maybe four back to back ray conniff classics
Actually what I am sir is your armed forces radio saigon assistant who's in charge of orientation and billeting of enlisted personnel and company clerk
Adrian
Adrian cronauer gis a wacky and welcome addition
Adrian cronauer is on temporary assignment and i'll be filling in until he arrives hopefully sometime this morning
Adrian cronauer is on temporary assignment but boy do I have a surprise for you
Adrian it's not going exactly well there's a water buffalo jackknifed up there
Adrian take care of yourself
Affirmative sir
Affirmative sir good
Afrs radio is owned and operated by the united states government and operates on an assigned carrier frequency of 540 at 749 megahertz
Afvn better than afvd which means you have to get a quick shot
Again we've got our friend from military intelligence
Aha! earl oh you again no more fighting okay
Ahem excuse me
Airman cronauer
Airman cronauer requesting you to elaborate sir
Airman you know the rules
All of a sudden well I got drunk all of a sudden I went for a tattoo next thing you know i'm on a fucking truck what happened
All right
All right all right cool
All right gentlemen I don't know oh my god these lips my god they're moving i'm gonna flap my eyebrows to death
All right guys let's say goodbye to the radio star! we're out of here
All right in saigon today according to official sources nothing actually happened
All right let's see
All right this is adrian cronauer i'm on at 6 00 and again at 4
All right where are you from
All right! thank you
All the news that's new and approved by the u s army the sweetest smelling army in the world
Also elizab queen elizabeth liz elizabeth taylor elizabeth taylor
Also gina lollobrigida has been declared the italian national mountain range
Also the pope decided today to release vatican related bath products an incredible thing yes it's the new pope on a rope that's right pope on a rope wash with it go straight to heaven
Am I being fairly clear
Am I being fairly clear (2)
American personnel can check out a book in ku bai da nang phung tao saigon bien hoa and san treng
An incredible coincidence
An loc and cronauer would definitely be going along
An loc his pass say an loc
An loc shit
And as far as polkas they are a much maligned musical taste
And don't say that the weather is the same all the time here because it's not in fact it's 2 degrees cooler today than yesterday
And for trusting you is the best of the gently of what you say of never to be for both the same and another
And I literally think that you owe it to all of them to get your ass back on the air
And i'd like to get to know all of you by having you write down your name address your home and work phone on a piece of paper and passing it forward
And i'm not used to girls being that quiet unless they're medicated
And i'm stupid enough to save your bullshit life at an loc
And if you do and if you do
And if you do happen to speak with him please be polite and to the point at all times
And my older brother who be 29 years old he dead
And now an item of special note
And now direct from crete welcome the silky smooth sound of airman adrian cronauer
And now here are the headlines
And perhaps some night we could maybe get together and swap humorous stories for fun yeah
And stop calling them gals cowgirls are called gals those are gorgeous french vietnamese b girls
And the stones oh you like mick jagger
And the troops they love him
And there's a man who's screaming out to be made fun of
And this is just radio
And this one is brought to you by our friends at the pentagon remember the people who brought you korea
And we wish you good luck and success
And well comedy is a kind of hobby of mine
And what about jimmy wah's
And which marx brother would that be private zeppo
And who gave anyone permission to program modern music
And yet this boy can get in and out without a scratch
And you have to get on the air
And you wanna take the ball
And you you are not funny but you are a maniac and you'd better start changing your life
Andy williams perry como and certain ballads by mr frank sinatra
Antics damn it comedy of errors like the keystone kops falling down
Any food on this street that doesn't give you diarrhea
Anything! just play it loud okay
Anyway he's the man that you don't want to aggravate
Anyway there's this guy from the 1st battalion 2nd infantry who swore that he could get him naked photographs of the actor
Are asked to drop a card to major gerald kleiner over at the 5th
Are you always this happy
Are you crazy I might
Are you planning sir to take some of the marijuana home back to the united states how would you do that by plane by helicopter and also by automobile
Arf! easy girl easy
Arranging rakes by sizes for my mom in the garage
As I leave vietnam today there is no doubt certainly in my mind whether the vietcong will be defeated and that this war will be won
As soon as possible
Ask for the books by author title and subject and your selections will be mailed to you
At ease
At ease (2)
At ease hell we already are
Attention shoppers people people settle
Ba muy ba beer best beer in vietnam ba muy ba beer only beer in vietnam
Baby help me please
Back again
Basically it's hotter than a snake's ass in a waggon round up
Basically we talk hey man what's happening
Be my guest
Beach boys those were guys
Because basically I believe that that man is a misunderstood genius
Big fucking deal
Bikes we'll buy bikes
Black man's going it's just for the tip that's all I need is the tip
Bob fliber!
Bob likes a big room sir
Bob what do you do
Bookworms headquarters support activities saigon operates libraries at six locations in the republic of vietnam
Boston
Boston you know who sang the song my guy
Break the goddamn door down
Britain imposed an oil embargo on rhodesia today after that country's unilateral declaration of independence
Brother striker thank you brother striker
Bullshit
Bullshit! listen no more games okay
But can you tell me what it feels like
But facts are facts
But he left a farewell message for all you guys out there still sweating it out in the fields
But hey I like the class so i'm gonna stay
But I can easily play an occasional gary lewis record
But I warn you you not like it when you get there you say it ridiculous
But if you toy with me i'll burn you so bad you'll wish you died as a child
But it doesn't mean we can't have a few laughs
But not before his humor cost the lives of three very fine individuals
But regardless of what you read airman the department of defense wants final say
But vietnam ladies not friends
By the food and flower vendors where you burn your mouth on the noodles
Bye bye bye
Call me crazy he's in rome
Call me in five minutes
Call police quick
Can we have is there a psychiatrist here
Can we please not get into this right now you're in the middle of a show
Can we try my boyfriend's back anybody
Can we try that one
Can you believe the shape of those gals girls
Can you envision some fairly unattractive alternatives
Can you give me a minute
Can you tell us what you've found out about the enemy since you've been here
Can't let you do that
Can't see dick like hunting with ray charles
Careful you could put an eye out with that
Carry on montesque carry on
Chaperons
Check it out
Cleveland obviously vietnam's not that much of a change for you then
Come on
Come on come on
Come on guess again
Come on it's cursing class you're getting a little pissed off what would you do
Come on let me buy you a beer
Come on let me buy you a couple of beers how about it
Come on pal we'll make it
Come on sir
Come on sir in a couple of weeks this'll be easy for you
Come on take some chances once in a while edward that's what life's all about
Come on you're on in like two seconds
Comedy no no this is not comedy comedy is fun it's antics hysterical type things
Comedy sir
Cretan camouflage if you wanna blend into a crowd of drunken greeks there's nothing better
Cronauer
Cronauer i'm sorry as hell about this thing
Cut that thing off I said cut it off
Da nang me da nang me why don't they get a rope and hang me
Dan levitan
Dan levitan you've probably heard my radio show
Definitely wouldn't work on radio sir
Dick i've covered for you a lot of times because I thought you was a little crazy but you're not crazy you're mean
Didn't have to pick up the phones until he comes back
Didn't I speak to you before
Didn't know they had balls
Didn't we meet last year at the feinman bar mitzvah
Didn't we meet last year at the peninsula club
Didn't you ever wonder why you were pulled out just moments before the whole place blew up
Didn't you hear I cannot find you unless you talk to me
Do you ever wonder how a young south vietnamese boy gets into and out of vc held territory
Do you have any idea how ridiculous it makes me look to have a man under my command start a fucking bar brawl
Do you really expect me to run this radio station with nothing to say and no way to do it
Do you think he looks like a negative of little richard or am I crazy really and that hair
Does that road have a secure status
Don't build him up you'll let them down
Don't disappoint your
Don't do this shit
Don't get crazy over this dick
Don't get me wrong he seems like a nice guy but my father's nice and he's not funny either
Don't go near there get away from the river stay away from there
Don't help and don't smooth
Don't ruin it by conjuring up images of dale evans all right
Don't worry about it it'll go great this way sir
Don't you understand dick
Due respect sir
E g hey hauk eat a bag of shit you suck
Earl earl earl
Eat
Eat I can't it's still paddling
Eddie kirk here and ray conniff jubilee coming up in just a few moments
Edward don't you ever do anything that's not by the book
Edward please that's two nasty words in one year
Edward stay with me on this
Either of our names earl he calls everybody earl
Enemy what is enemy
Ethel merman jams russian radar
Ethel merman today uses a test to jam russian radar
Even encapsulated in two seconds my life is dull I find that very alarming
Even saying that means I don't know dick
Every gi in this country is glued to his radio twice a day at 0600 hours and 1600 hours to hear that lunatic
Everybody say gook but it's all right
Everybody time to get up get up wherever you are
Excuse me can I help you
Excuse me sir
Falling down that's a sight gag how would anyone see you fall down in the radio sir