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Home > Sisters (2015)
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Sisters (2015)

Sisters (2015)

Sisters (2015) is a hilarious comedy film that revolves around the lives of two sisters who decide to throw a wild party in their childhood home before their parents sell it. Directed by Jason Moore and written by Paula Pell, this movie showcases the incredible comedic talents of Tina Fey and Amy Poehler as the titular sisters, with a fantastic supporting cast that includes Maya Rudolph, Ike Barinholtz, and John Leguizamo.

Released in 2015, Sisters follows the story of Kate Ellis (Tina Fey) and Maura Ellis (Amy Poehler). Kate is a single mother who never quite grew out of her partying ways, while Maura is the responsible one, always putting others before herself. When they discover that their childhood home is being sold, they decide to relive their glory days one last time by throwing an epic house party.

The wild adventure begins as they reconnect with their high school friends and former classmates. Maya Rudolph delivers a standout performance as Brinda, a snobby and uptight rival who always manages to outshine Maura. The dynamic between Maya Rudolph and Amy Poehler brings some of the film's most hilarious moments. The chemistry between the two actresses is electric, and their comedic timing is flawless.

Supporting the main cast are actors Ike Barinholtz and John Leguizamo. Barinholtz plays James, a charming and handsome neighbor who catches Kate's eye. As their relationship develops throughout the movie, Barinholtz brings a delightful mix of humor and sincerity to the character. On the other hand, John Leguizamo portrays Dave, a hilarious drug dealer who adds a layer of chaos to the already insane house party.

The film's soundtrack is a perfect blend of classic hits from the '80s and '90s, which contributes to the overall nostalgic feel of the story. Songs like "White Lines" by Grandmaster Flash & Melle Mel, "Bitch" by Meredith Brooks, and "Insane in the Brain" by Cypress Hill create a lively atmosphere that immerses viewers in the party experience. If you want to relive the energy and excitement, you can easily play and download these incredible sounds here.

Sisters is not just a raucous comedy; it also digs deeper into the complex relationship between siblings. Through the ups and downs, the film explores the bond between Kate and Maura and how they navigate their adult lives. Fey and Poehler capture the essence of sisterhood too well, portraying the struggles and unconditional love that exists between sisters.

Director Jason Moore masterfully balances the comedic and emotional aspects of the film, creating a well-rounded experience for the audience. The witty banter, slapstick humor, and outrageous situations provide constant laughter, while the heartfelt moments reveal the vulnerability behind the characters.

Overall, Sisters (2015) is a must-watch comedy that guarantees a fun-filled ride from start to finish. With an outstanding ensemble cast led by the comedy powerhouses Tina Fey and Amy Poehler, this film offers a perfect blend of laughter, nostalgia, and heartwarming moments. So, gather your own sisters or friends, and prepare to be entertained as you watch their misadventures unfold on-screen. And remember, you can find the film's incredible soundtrack here, allowing you to relive the excitement whenever you want.

A lot of sex is gonna happen. A lot of sexy times.
A party?
A treadmill? Morn can't even sit right on a couch.
A ween that is still wearing its hat.
Aah! No bullets!
About 6'3. With the ladder, about 7'6.
About moving in with Gram and Gramps, and you know I love Orlando.
Absolutely hell no.
Absolutely not.
Adam is thinking of coming, and Gabe is on the fence, so...
Ah, e'rybody.
Ah, I knew you were talking shit about us.
Ah, maybe. What time?
Ah...
Ah...
Alex is still funny, guys.
Alex, come on.
Alex, take your dick out of the paint, right this minute!
All loans are supposed to be paid back.
All right, don't yell at me.
All right, tell me something else.
All right!
All right? Clean the donuts out of your ears
All right.
All right.
All right. All right.
All right. But I will now.
All right. Go do it.
All right. Just getting into it.
All right. Let's bring this in for a landing, Dana.
All right. Ready? Ready?
All unattended baggage will be confiscated.
All we have is wine.
All we need you to do is to come and clean out your bedroom
Alligators. Choking on a steak.
Also it's, um, on backwards.
Also? P.S. It would be such an easy way for you to pop your post divorce flirt cherry.
Amazing! You're crushing it!
An unsettling amount.
And also we didn't send it.
And before I could stop him
And call it a sad, hard day for two dusty old twats.
And climbed a rock wall to save me.
And doing nothing else, and I am telling the truth.
And everyone is trying to help us out,
And from what I can thin slice from your Christmas letters, they're wangs.
And go save a kitten from a tree,
And got t boned by a parked car.
And hear the words that are coming out of my mouth.
And his hair is so long that when I make outwith him
And I cannot stop trailing off.
And I don't want you to think that this loan is contingent on that,
And I felt bad for her, you know?
And I gave my keys to your pet sitter, like you told me.
And I got mostly B's!
And I have to get a wipe, and I have to wipe out his paws every night.
And I have too much baggage. Won't fix everything.
And I really need a job.
And I sent you a picture o? Me and Polenta. She misses you.
And I think you're really cute. Thank you.
And I will text you a picture of my boobs.
And I would hate to see you out there blowing hobos at 40.
And I'll say whatever I wanna say
And it looks like kinda damn fun.
And it turns out that Gram and Gramps are selling their house.
And it's gonna affect my relationship with him.
And it's Pogee, the Christmas Tree Elf.
And just a skosh of Cloud 10.
And just gonna ease on down the road and re run it to the car.
And look what I pulled out of your wallet. Success is desire in action.
And my manager started bitching me out,
And never get sick of it.
And now I just feel sort of bad for you two.
And now that I'm here you're gonna blow me off?
And put some underwear on! What?
And right now...
And she was living with you the whole time?
And she's in high fifth position, which is why she went in so easily.
And stop following us around like we're gonna die any minute.
And take a commemorative picture.
And that you ask for what you want.
And the eye goes right to it. Yeah, look at that.
And then everybody decided that I was a no!
And then guess who decided that I was a no?
And then I can see the pictures?
And then I realized that was just my reflection.
And then sometimes it goes right into the trash.
And then swatting it away. Isn't it?
And then we can discuss if selling the house is the best plan for us.
And then we suck on these?
And then we're gonna use the other 50% to pay off the condo.
And then you decided that I was a no.
And then you're gonna get heart cramps.
And there aren't so many rules.
And this is how you thank them?
And this is our property for the next 24 hours.
And those are hard to get rid of. It stinks up your whole house.
And we downloaded all our pictures!
And we forgot to type it.
And we mean this from the bottom of our hearts.
And we would probably still be friends
And we're do... Nope.
And we're only medium drunk.
And we're very happy for you, honey.
And when my dad finally died, he actually glowed.
And who's this fine ass female?
And Wu got a job!
And you can finally have sex in your old, crappo bed!
And you hollered, I'm the bomb!
And you know what the saddest part is?
And you let everything go to shit.
And you look like a Ken doll, hopefully with the genitals. Fingers crossed.
And you start acting like one of the Rea! Housewives of Orange County.
And you, my friend, have some irregular moles.
And you? What are you up to'? Nothing?
And you're afraid that they're not gonna like you back,
And your asses are getting up at 6:00 a m. To clean up.
And your father put them on this.
And, you know, great sex is so distracting. I mean, it's...
Any underage drinking going on?
Anyway,
Are busy professionals, looking for an yard artisan
Are those the new owners?
Are we gonna die?
Are you at a party right now?
Are you even old enough to get a mortgage?
Are you gonna be okay?
Are you gonna get me a drink?
Are you on email?
Are you selling it to each other?
Are you serious? Because I am straight up baffled.
Are you seriously asking?
As a love gift.
As much as you would love that, wouldn't you?
Ask him. Desire needs action, or whatever the fuck that one said.
Asses up!
Aunt Maura, I don't know. I don't know.
Aw, look at you. Don't cry. It's gonna make me cry.
Aw, thank you. Thank you.
Aw. That's awesome. Thanks.
Awesome, man.
Awesome! Thank you, Vicky.
Back into me.
Backing into you.
Balls!
Be gentle. Be very, very careful.
Be that you! Be that you! Be that you!
Be what you?
Because I am cuntingly disappointed in you!
Because I am drunk and stoned.
Because I have a domestic side. Mmm hmm.
Because it seems like we'll never be done.
Because it's a bottomless pit.
Because my cousin met John Stamos at Disney and he was coming.
Because my great idea just got fucked in the a hole!
Because these pussies are doing fine.
Because we don? Want to.
Because we knew you'd try to talk us out of it.
Because we know we could die tomorrow!
Because we thought we would never die.
Because we're doing it, and we're cool.
Because we're done.
Because when I found out that I wasn't invited to your party
Because you heard what happened, right?
Because you'll show up there and you'll make a big scene like a hothead!
Because your face is telling me something else.
Beethoven. What a... What a genius.
Before you quit this one.
Being successful and having a really full and wonderful life.
Besides, I flushed a tampon down your toilet.
Best days behind us. Right, guys'?
Better work.
Blue?
Boink!
Boom! I got a job.
Booze, booze! Whoo hoo!
Both your feet looked like dried beef.
Brett came over to comfort me and I'm so obsessed with him.
Brinda is a hard no.
Brinda?
Bromo Dragonfly, heroin, coke, crack, codeine, oxys,
Burying your wife?
But don't do that
But for humans, it just makes them violently masturbate.
But I am afraid that I'm gonna zip my bush up in there.
But I did a lot of thinking and a little bit of prayer,
But I know they did.
But I like the story it tells with the fringe.
But I still talk about those Ellis Island parties, baby.
But I will say that if you don't do it,
But I'm dying to see that photo you were gonna send me.
But I'm very, very drunk, plus stoned. Let's go.
But now you have to get back with your mother.
But Rob's penis has a kink in it.
But that's not what life is.
But the men here?
But then afterwards she decided that she didn't want bangs.
But they are hiring and you are licensed to do nails.
But they leave your Santa eyebrows. Hmm.
But this one looks good.
But we will miss her. Him.
But you can do that now because you have a job.
But you narced to your cop dad.
But your butt is really serious.
But, whatever, dude. A lo! Of people are cute, so relax.
Bye, Dave! Whoo!
Bye!
Bye.
Bye.
Bye. We're leaving!
Calm down, Mom!
Can I talk to you for a second? Yeah.
Can we help you? Yes.
Can you give me a chance to offer?
Can you just give me a chance to make it right?
Can you let your parents know that if things like this aren't fixed by Monday,
Can you move it? Yeah.
Can you shut this shit down?
Can't hear you.
Capeach?
Chase has night terrors.
Chase was like a 10 pound baby.
Chase, we are gonna go see Nana.
Choke on a roll of cash.
Christ, he is immediately exhausting.
Cloud Nine didn't have this glitch in it.
Clutter has a name.
Clutter? You don't want clutter?
Come here, peanut.
Come on, Dave Blackmon! I was a senior, you were a junior.
Come on, Kate. Come on!
Come on, Maura!
Come on. Come on. Come on, now.
Come on. Here we go. Here we go!
Come on. I can't, I can't.
Come on. I got it! Mom?
Come on. I got it! Mom?
Come to Orlando. Ellis sisters reunion.
Congratulations. Thank you.
Cookout with your cock oui.
Corning home always makes things better.
Could you headline news it for me?
Cover time. Twenty bucks for the booze and food, please.
Crazy!
Dad and t got an idea.
Dad! Let it go.
Damn it. Shit!
Damn. Adults are on time, huh?
Dan and Kim. You got four kids,
Danger. Walk away. That's a black diamond slope.
Dave. I did him because he disgusted me in a sexy way.
Dear diary, tonight we had a party that fumed into a foam orgy.
Did we just cock block our parents'?
Did you know about this and not tell me'?
Did you know that Jack Gleeson was the little boy in Batman Begins?
Did you lose weight to gain self confidence?
Did you smell my head?
Do not work me like this! I hate it when you make me the bummer.
Do not work me like this! I hate it when you make me the bummer.
Do orchids smell?
Do you get good Wi Fi with that?
Do you get proper lunch breaks?
Do you go by Jimmy?
Do you have kids?
Do you hear that? It's Tipsy!
Do you know?
Do you oil yourself up a lot?
Do You play any sports?
Do you wanna do some shots? Yeah.
Do you want me to climb with you?
Do you want me to come down there and we can talk about it?
Do you want me to fix it?
Does a mother drink at her kid's birthday party?
Does Kate know about this?
Don't be upset.
Don't judge me. Your kids are in another country.
Don't let them smell your guilt.
Don't move. Stay right there.
Don't stay... Stay Yep. Thanks.
Don't tell me what my daughter needs, Okay?
Don't try this. This is not safe.
Don't you know I'm loco? Shit!
Don't you look great. That's a snazzy belt.
Don't you spit on me.
Don't you wanna feel that carefree again?
Drink up and run with scissors tonight, because Mama got you.
Drugs? I know a guy.
Drunk people like to show off with fi re. Shut it down.
Duane the bathtub.
E A T.
E'rybody in the club get tipsy.
E'rybody. E'ry day, e'ry hour, e'ry minute.
Each one of those objects is a puzzle piece in the story of our lives.
Ellis Island, proceed, y'all!
Ellis sisters in the house!
Enjoy your kids while they're young because it goes so fast.
Especially from my sister. It gives me guilt diarrhea.
Everybody duck!
Everybody, gamer round, okay?
Everybody, huddle up for a second.
Everybody!
Everybody's double 21 in there.
Everyone say a non denominational
Everyone, I'm gonna sneeze, shut the fuck up!
Everyone's distracted by the emergency right now.
Exactly! And then just wait until you get that better job
Excellent.
Excuse me.
Fine. I have another function to attend anyway.
Fine. Let's just brush our remaining teeth
Fine. Let's just brush our remaining teeth
Fire bad.
First PoPo of the night thwarted by charm.
Foam party!
For free.
For me, the deal breaker might be the eating of the pussy.
Forget it. I'll be fine. It's okay.
Free slicking.
From someone who got invited.
Fuck it.
Fuck no.
Fuck Off!
Fuck off! I'm the manager here.
Fuck the Geernts!
Fuck!
Fuck! Shit, fuck!
Fucking party.
Fucking texting her every day, and freaking out about her every day.
Fun train pulling in!
Garage sale. Okay.
Garfield always comes through. Yeah, he's...
Garfield!
Geernt!
Geernt. Sounds like a queef on a yoga ball.
Get in there, kid.
Get it, girl. What?
Get out.
Get ready for a Sarah McLachlan/Tracy Chapman mash up.
Get some big, basic salamis.
Get you looking nice and clean so you can throw up on it later.
Get your peanut butter out of my sister's chocolate.
Girl fight!
Girl fight!
Girls.
Give a little bit of heart and sou!
Give a little bit of heart and soul...
Give a little hi! Of love in grow.
Give me that phone! Give me that!
Go and live your life
Go to Costco, get a pan of hot wings.
Go, go, go!
God damn it!
God, I could watch Tyrion slap the smug
God, you guys need to chill out.
God. We need, like, a little less Forever 21 and a little more Suddenly 42.
Good for you, because ladies your age are gross, right?
Good Lord.
Good night, sweet prince.
Good things are hidden in the quiet.
Good, I think.
Good. Can you hear this?
Good. Little asshole cream. No.
Got a picture from Haley.
Got some Poise Pads in there I see.
Great. Great.
Great. It's important to have a lady out there in the street.
Great. It's not too late.
Gross! Hey, you know how it is.
Guess I could get something better once we're settled, right?
Guns N' Roses. Citrus Bowl, 1991.
Hae Won mean head.
Hae Won!
Hae Won.
Hae Won.
Hae Won.
Hae Won. Hae Won.
Hae Won. Hae Won.
Hae Won. No. Hae Won.
Hae Won. What a beautiful name. What does that mean?
Hales' this could keep sinking.
Haley, don't be scared. Here we go.
Haley!
Haley!
Haley! Haley!
Haley! How slash where are you?
Haley?
Haley?
Haley? Mom!
Haley's good. It's all fine.
Hang tight, lady!
Happy birthday to me.
Happy Birthday!
Has anyone seen my sister?
Having a pretty big party, huh?
Having sex in your childhood bedroom is a rite of passage.
He ate the poop with the waxing strip in it again.
He got a new neck brace to stretch his melting vertebrae.
He has a yeast infection in his paws, between his paw pads,
He loved his birthday card.
He took her from behind in line at graduation.
He was so afraid of us.
He's gonna help us out. Oh, God!
He's on Cloud 10!
He's so direct' you know. There's no surprises there.
Headless and angry. Yeah.
Heartless.
Hello there.
Hello, sir. Nice to meet you for the first time.
Hello?
Hello?
Hello? This is very unprofessional.
Hello.
Help me wash it off. Yeah?
Here she comes. She's coming close. She's right here.
Here we go. My dad's gonna murder me!
Here, give me a kiss.
Here, I have something you should write down.
Here's a chart of all the penises I ever saw.
Here's a list of my houseplants.
Here's our truth.
Here's really incorrect information about how to put a IUD in.
Herm. His name was Herm.
Hey one.
Hey, Aunt Maura. I just landed in Orlando! Thanks for our conversation.
Hey, Brinda. What have you been up to?
Hey, Brinda. What up'?
Hey, Hae Won. Would you like to come to a party tonight?
Hey, here's something fun.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. Hi.
Hey, honey. I'm sure you're out having fun
Hey, honey. It's Maura. Hey.
Hey, I think you're getting ahead of yourself.
Hey, I want Pop Pop's grandfather clock.
Hey, it's me.
Hey, it's okay.
Hey, look at you.
Hey, man. I got you. Shit!
Hey, Mom, we are doing so much work over there
Hey, see you tonight! You know, I'm laying down a bread base.
Hey, we can't have dinner tonight.
Hey, who's this guy?
Hey, you backing it up!
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
Hey! Hi! Hey!
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey. Cool if I spin some tunes?
Hey. Hey.
Hey. How's everything going?
Hey. I can't talk right now.
Hey. I like that you know who you are.
Hey. I put in a request for our special song
Hey. I'm sorry. Hold on one second. Hold on one second.
Hey. Lollapazuzu, I'm partying now.
Hey. Plus one.
Hey. We received a noise complaint?
Hi, Dave. I'm Maura, Kate's younger sister.
Hi, honey.
Hi, I'd like to make a noise complaint.
Hi, Mom, I'm here.
Hi, there.
Hi, there. Dropping off paint.
Hi. Hi.
Hi. I'm Maura Ellis.
Hi. We donated already.
Hi. Why?
Hi. You guys are welcome here. You know that, right?
Him or me?
His face smells like Sea Breeze
Hmm, what do you think, Brayla?
Hmm, you should check it out.
Hmm?
Hmm?
Hmm.
Hmm...
Holy Moses with his balls out.
Holy shit.
Holy shit.
Holy shit.
Home is a feeling.
Honestly... We can't have Christmas here!
Honestly... We can't have Christmas here!
How are things at the hospital, honey?
How can one person have two colonoscopy stories?
How does this sucker not stay lit?
How long is this fucking song?
How? How did he even know?
How'd you sleep?
How's it going in here?
How's it going in there?
How's it going in there?
Huh!
Hush! It looks cold.
I 'm glad you talked me into coming down I do trust you.
I actually own this house.
I am a fuck to the yeah!
I am a hell yeah.
I am a hell yes!
I am a yeah.
I am actually just renovating it, I'm gonna put it on the market.
I am afraid so. Okay.
I am an actual mom! I got this!
I am at a friend's house.
I am done wasting words on that ho.
I am going to ask you for something in return for the money,
I am not a hothead! I am brassy.
I am not a selfish hothead!
I am not buying that bull waste.
I am not going in to work tomorrow. TSA can kiss my ass.
I am now a sponsor of a child in Ecuador.
I am so sorry about that.
I believe you called this party a sad and desperate event?
I bet he has, like, 50 DUls right now.
I bet Nail Pimp Daddy over there treats them like his whores.
I bet working on other people's bushes really makes you wanna whack your weeds.
I can feel my hair growing!
I can get whatever is up there out.
I can smell that bitch's hairspray from here.
I can still hear you!
I can't believe they did this without consulting me.
I can't go to the bathroom at restaurants. You know that.
I can't stand the wailing of women.
I can't think of what it's called.
I cannot!
I changed the grit on my rock tumbler today.
I could French manicure a chicken while it was running away.
I could pick up quarters with it, if I wanted to.
I could put this one in the condo, if you like.
I did. I'm smart.
I did. Just now.
I didn't quit! All right.
I didn't smoke pot because I was afraid there wasn't enough for everyone...
I didn't think... That's wild. That's wild.
I do.
I don't clean up after myself anymore. I'm an adult.
I don't get it. Explain it more. I have a...
I don't get this dress.
I don't have insurance.
I don't have my good bra on. I have beef jerky breath.
I don't know about that one.
I don't know what the fuck they were talking about,
I don't know where she is.
I don't know, Dana. It must be a client's.
I don't know. I can't even...
I don't know. It's just like...
I don't know. Maybe they wanna get a treadmill.
I don't know. You might live like another eight or 10 years, Kelly.
I don't need one. You will.
I don't need to protect anything from her. That's my sister.
I don't think we should do that tonight. That's not that cool.
I dreamt I had no job and no place to live.
I encourage all of you to make your mark on this house tonight.
I feel bad that we didn't invite her. I hate it when people aren't included.
I feel like I might not give you the money.
I feel like I'm saying it right. No?
I got a baloney dick!
I got a question.
I got an idea that's gonna solve everything. Haley's gonna flip.
I got birth control. I got Plan B.
I got divorced.
I got in a wreck because I was admiring
I got ketamine, meth, MDMA, Adderall,
I got lured down here for this?
I got some Ibuprofen, aspirin. I got Flintstone Gummies if you want.
I got that morphine from China they took off the market.
I guess I was just making sure the house didn't get destroyed.
I have a heart on for him. I have a raging heart on.
I have been waiting a long time for this.
I have nachos that are in the broiler.
I haven't been able to find her, like, all summer.
I haven't wanted to yet.
I heard you were having a party.
I held your mullet back one time when you were vomiting at our party
I just assumed you were missing.
I just did it three times! Don't yell at me!
I just made that up! Put another Jenga on it.
I just smoked some 21st century pot.
I just think we're gonna be very good friends.
I kind of want to stay a little.
I kinda wanna drop by.
I know how to use Facebook.
I know something about you. You're a nice person, right?
I know you get tons of dick!
I know, I know. Just give me a second.
I know.
I know. He breaks my heart. He wants to be funny, though.
I know. The last party I went to was probably my wedding reception.
I like Arby's.
I liked your speech.
I lingered back so we could be seniors together?
I look like a dead deer bloated on the highway.
I lost a whole bunch of weight recently.
I love cocaine! Because I have a scar on my face!
I love it.
I love it. I want more.
I love jus. I love ****, too.
I love you, Mom, but your life is just too chaotic right now.
I love you. Love you, too.
I made out with a sweet, hot, funny guy who really liked me
I mean, ask Gram and Gramps.
I mean, at least the women are making an effort,
I mean, I can't wait to watch your butt on DVD.
I mean, I like mystery.
I mean, it is like, dead ringer times.
I mean, we're just kind of picking...
I mean, you can ask me anything.
I mean, you were pushy kids.
I mean' it was decimated. That's horrible. Ugh.
I meant to say that a little smoother
I might have fucked a copy machine!
I misjudged the shotgun. I was going to.
I miss flirting with cops.
I miss how my daughter smells when she has wet hair.
I miss those goddamn glory days.
I missed the little guy. Not little.
I must admit,
I need more stevia!
I need to learn to be more irresponsible
I need to talk to you outside. Now. Oh. Oh.
I never met a Brayla before.
I pretend it's a scarf.
I put their hairs in my bra.
I really am so fun.
I really hope Maura cracks her in half.
I remember how to do it!
I remember you.
I respect your jumpsuit, but not its contents. Hit it.
I said maybe we should have a party.
I say, tonight, we party like Vikings
I set the alarm at your condo,
I should warn you that this did not go well
I shouldn't be telling you this,
I shouldn't keep that to myself. No, you shouldn't!
I start trusting you again and then you turn around
I swallowed my wedding ring!
I swear I was having fun.
I think he's probably gonna haunt the house forever.
I think I need to be alone with my asshole.
I think I'm too sad to go now.
I think it's about how you feel, right?
I think it's almost done.
I think it's what they call either/and.
I think maybe we should do it.
I think we should go. Great to see you, Dave.
I think we should move down here and live with Mom and Dad for a while.
I think you guys froze. Hold on. Can you hear me?
I think you're being a little dramatic. I'm not.
I thought I saw the Ellis sisters.
I thought you were missing. I saw your picture on the bus stop.
I took my deaf friend to the Sheila E. Concert
I tried tampons.
I used to make out with my Stretch Armstrong doll,
I wanna be balls deep in joy.
I wanna do that foam thing like we saw at the Fart Mitzvah.
I wanna thank my sister, Kate, for holding down the fort
I want a different village, because this one sucks!
I want the front yard to be open concept.
I was just, urn, putting the silverware in the drawers here.
I was kind and clean!
I was like, What? What year is it?
I was the designated driver because I could tell no one else wanted to be.
I waved at her, and she waved back at me,
I will full out BJ a hot curling iron.
I will handle this.
I will keep sending you pictures so that you know that I'm safe.
I will protect my all's property from all y'all and that's including moi.
I will see you on Monday.
I will slit my throat and put it on YouTube.
I wish being gay was a choice because I always did like that shorts and boots look.
I wish we had some lubricant.
I woke up one day, and boom. No more periods.
I work my butt to save my kids
I worry that she just wants the sale. She's not telling us the truth.
I would love to see you let it rip.
I would love to.
I'll be right back. If it feels like it's burning, it's working.
I'll be you. You be me.
I'll climb with you, okay? I'm gonna climb right here, next to you.
I'll drop off the paint later. Unless you'll be day napping.
I'll put it by the pool.
I'll remember it.
I'll take the stuff for the dick. I got you.
I'll take this. Y'all mind if I hang out a bit?
I'll talk them out of it. It's okay. It's not okay!
I'll tell you what.
I'm a solid guy. I don't mind being the butt of your jokes.
I'm actually gonna need everyone to just
I'm afraid that I'm boring... I'm afraid that losing weight...
I'm afraid to tell you no.
I'm Alex.
I'm all over it.
I'm at Gram and Gramps'.
I'm dwowning!
I'm fine. I'm really good. I'm real good.
I'm going in there to fix the drywall.
I'm gonna binge watch your butt when I have the flu.
I'm gonna borrow this. Let's not make this the headline of the night.
I'm gonna do stuff to you right now. YOU are?
I'm gonna get it out, whatever it is. Mmm hmm. Okay.
I'm gonna kill you.
I'm gonna laugh in that butt.
I'm gonna laugh.
I'm gonna make myself a drink, and face the wall.
I'm gonna mount it in a bolo tie for Dylan.
I'm gonna picture that he ate
I'm gonna stay at Annie's house again. All right.
I'm gonna talk you through it.
I'm gonna... I love to...
I'm in. Lock it up.
I'm James. Hi, James.
I'm just a nurse who likes to give back on her days off.
I'm just gonna casually George Jefferson my way out of here.
I'm just gonna roll you over so I can examine your rectum.
I'm just hiding this stevia. That shit's expensive.
I'm like a little Pablo Dickasso!
I'm meeting you in the bedroom.
I'm not gonna be able to say no to her face.
I'm not Italian. I don't know why I said it like that.
I'm not laughing at that butt. I'll laugh with your butt.
I'm not part of a religious group or anything.
I'm on it.
I'm on the phone!
I'm open to new ways.
I'm pissed.
I'm plastered all over the bus stops.
I'm pretty good with sayings,
I'm pretty mad at him right now.
I'm really
I'm single, actually. Oh'
I'm so excited! We're getting a house, and you're gonna have your own room.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
I'm so sorry. I invited him, because I feel bad for him. He's very lonely.
I'm sorry I told you. I'm sorry you had to find out this way.
I'm sorry, I'm keeping this colander.
I'm sorry, man. They're just new to the game.
I'm sorry, Vicky. Don't apologize for me.
I'm sorry?
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. It's just that's, like, my worst fear.
I'm sorry. That got dirty really fast.
I'm super excited about this!
I'm sure I do.

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