Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990) Edit

A friend.

A Jose Canseco bat?

A little bit more like that.

A little to the right. A little to the left.

A loony. Okay?

Aaa aaa aah!

Aah!

Aah!

About what I said before...

Afraid of enclosed areas.

Afraid?

After everything I've heard out of Little Tokyo...

Again, you're putting words into my mouth.

Ah. Hey, I don't have to take this stuff about being afraid.

Ah...

All fathers care for their sons.

All right, Casey.

All right, I want some answers.

All right, let's go.

All right.

All right. That's it.

ALL: No.

Am I behind on my Sony payments again? Ha ha ha.

An invisible gang at work?

An unknown which they can't bear to face...

And all you say is hi?

And always remember the true force that binds you...

And at the moment, business is good.

And before we go out advertising to The Foot that we're back...

And do not forget me.

And do you now hide from your surrogate family as well?

And have you no one to go to, Danny'?

And he knows my name.

And I mean no anchovies.

And I thought insurance salesmen were pushy.

And if he's watching, thanks, Raphael.

And soon I gave them all names...

And speaking of which, we better get going.

And that rat...

And the rat...

And then he saw her killer.

And then there's Casey Jones...

And we're gonna have to wait and see if it helps generate any new information.

And?

Anger clouds the mind.

APRIL [IN VOICEOVER]: It's strange being back on the old farm.

APRIL [OVER MACHINE]: Hi, this is April.

April O'Neil, Channel 3 Eyewitness News.

April, I told you there were circumstances.

APRIL: Charles, give the kid a break.

APRIL: Charles, that's ridiculous.

APRIL: Danny? Don't shoot.

APRIL: Ew. Are you guys sure you know where you're going?

APRIL: Hasn't Raph been gone a long time?

APRIL: He'll be okay.

APRIL: How's Raphael? LEONARDO: Not so good.

APRIL: I just had a rough night.

APRIL: I only keep it open part time, mostly for my dad.

APRIL: Oh, no. Oh.

APRIL: Oh...

APRIL: Ointment? Mm mm.

APRIL: Raph!

APRIL: The turtles are four once again...

APRIL: Ugh. Hey, Danny, how's school going?

APRIL: Very funny.

APRIL: Well, I'll tell you one thing.

APRIL: What, and give up all this glamour? Ha ha ha.

APRIL: What's wrong?

APRIL: Would you quit complaining? It's just for the night.

APRIL: Yeah, I know it sounds like a funky club for podiatrists...

April...

April's our only link to these guys.

Are the police looking into this?

Are you coming or not, dude?

Are you crazy?

Are you sure?

Are you trying to tell me how to do my job?

As my master returned home...

Attack.

Aw. No more?

Awesome.

Awesome. Ha! Ha! Ha!

Because I wanted to redecorate.

Before that time, I was a pet of my master Yoshi...

Besides, I knew you'd just worry and then rush over here like you did this morning.

Bossa nova!

Bossa nova?

BOTH: One, two, three. Mm.

BOY 1: How are you doing?

BOY 1: Nice shot, man.

BOY 2: I need a cigar.

BOY 3: All right.

BOY 3: Hey.

Boy, I guess we can really shell it out.

BOY: Master.

BOY: Yeah. I am.

But as you face it, do not forget them.

But nothing could have prepared me for what happened next.

But perhaps the most disturbing silence...

But whoever is behind these crimes, one thing is certain.

But you must never stop practicing the art of ninja...

Call it a quirk, but I like to know when one of my best reporters has been mugged.

Can we keep her?

Can you fix it?

Can you guys...

CASEY: Gangway, men. I'll take care of these guys.

CASEY: Not even close, zip neck.

CASEY: So long, freak. I got work to do.

CASEY: Strike one.

CASEY: This is great, it's great.

Casey.

Charles Pennington?

Charles, what are you talking about? It's my story. No way.

Charles, what's up?

CHARLES: April, it's Charles.

CHARLES: Come on, April, you could've called me last night, you know?

CHARLES: It's me, Charles. it's my boss.

CHARLES: Look at you. You're exhausted.

Check it out, man. Anything you guys want, we got it.

Class is Pain 101. Your instructor is Casey Jones.

Come on, we got to get out of here.

Come on.

Come on.

Come on. Don't just

Come on. Hurry up.

Come sit by me.

Concentrate hard.

COP 1: Come on, no fighting.

COP 1: Listen, rest right here while we deal with these guys.

COP 1: Ted, give John a hand. COP 2: What you got there?

COP 2: Ready.

COP: Come on, folks.

Couldn't this wait till morning?

Cowabunga!

Crimes without criminals?

Damn!

Damn!

Damn!

Dan?

Danny, damn it.

DANNY: Dad.

DANNY: Jeez, these are good.

DANNY: Nowhere.

Danny?

Danny.

Danny.

Danny.

Death comes for us all, Oroku Saki...

Did you know that May Williams over at Channel 5 has her own office?

Did you take classes in insensitivity?

Do I?

Do you want to be first, junior, huh?

Do you want to throw me a clue here? I'm drowning.

Does anybody have any idea about who or what this is?

Does that answer your question?

Doing something together, I don't know.

Don't move. Get those kids. Don't let them get away.

Don't worry. He'll probably be back any minute.

Don't worry. I came prepared.

Donatello has found someone to latch onto.

DONATELLO: All right. Shh, Shh.

DONATELLO: Ha ha. No doubt about it. She loved us.

DONATELLO: Hee hee hee. No sweat.

DONATELLO: Nice night.

DONATELLO: Pizza. I need it.

Donatello.

Draw upon one another.

Each of them deals with this confusion in his own way.

Elf lips.

Especially bald ones with green makeup...

Even more alarming is the baffling...

Even the victims themselves rarely catch a glimpse of the thieves.

Even those who would be our allies would not understand.

Family? Is that what you said? Family?

Fifteen years ago

First it's the farm that time forgot, and now this.

Flies, stink bugs.

Fools. Ha ha.

For 15 years now, we have lived here.

For when you die, it will be

Fore.

Freak!

From now on, security is gonna escort you...

Gangway

Get a grip, will you?

Gilligan was a geek, barfaroni.

Gilligan was her main man.

Go check out the East Warehouse over at Lairdman Island.

Go.

God, I love being a turtle!

God, where have you been?

Good answer.

Good.

Good.

Good.

Gosh, I do hope there's more of them.

Gosh, it's kind of like Moonlighting, isn't it?

Gotcha.

Great how you did that, it rocks.

Guess it's hard to get good maid service in a sewer.

Guys, I told you...

H9)'

Ha ah!

Ha ha ha. Righteous.

Ha ha! Yee ha!

Ha! Ha ha! Ha!

Ha! Hey, Donnie, looks like this one's suffering from shell shock. Ha!

Hah!

Hah.

Hai!

Hai!

Have you got something else?

He cares nothing for you or the people you hurt.

He dies.

He is still missing.

He might almost be cute if it wasn't for that pigheadedness.

He poisons your minds to obtain that which he desires.

He wants some food.

He's alive.

He's already got the mayor breathing down my neck.

He's outwith the others...

Heh.

Heh. He loved junk.

Hey, Bogie, now, who died and made you referee?

Hey, Danny, will you tell your father to relax?

Hey, Donnie, Wheel of Fortune, dude.

Hey, forget it.

Hey, guys.

Hey, hey, heV

Hey, I got another one.

Hey, I told them to call me here immediately...

Hey, look. Nyak nyak.

Hey, Raph, where you going?

Hey, this is a 10. The tab's 13.

Hey, where do you think you're going?

Hey. Hey, he's awake.

Hi?

His only rival was a man named Oroku Saki...

Hmm hmm.

Hmm.

Hmm.

Hmm. Too derivative.

Ho She called me Mikey.

How about a five minute game misconduct for roughing, pal?

How can a face so young wear so many burdens?

How did you know that?

Huh?

Huh. Huh? Uh Huh.

Huh. I'm not sure I understood all that, Chief Stems.

I /eapt to Saki's face, biting and clawing...

I am here, my son.

I am not.

I deliver a message.

I do not understand.

I don't get it, Danny.

I don't know, Charles, you know...

I don't know.

I don't know. It's dumb to lose money on a business...

I don't know...

I don't think that will be a problem, Leo.

I don't think.

I doubt that is true.

I gathered them up in an old coffee can...

I go myself.

I got him.

I guess they're not game show fans.

I have always liked...

I have not seen you for days.

I have to get ready for work.

I have tried to channel your anger, Raphael...

I just I just don't want you to see my unsightly bathtub ring. Okay?

I just thought you might like a little help.

I know it is hard for you here underground.

I know Splinter's out there.

I know what it's like to travel without a green card.

I know who you are.

I know, you're right. I'm just What's that?

I like it. Step up.

I lost a sai.

I love you all, my sons.

I made a funny.

I mean, about what it would be like...

I mean, come on.

I mean, the block's got a crack in it the size of the San Andreas.

I never said I was your great leader.

I ran away from home.

I really need you to cover this.

I remember it well.

I still don't see why we don't get started right away.

I suggest we all meditate now...

I think he's actually turning red.

I think he's blushing. Heh.

I think you know just as much as I do about this Foot Clan...

I too was growing, particularly in intellect...

I too...

I want a large thick crust with double cheese...

I want some stretchers in here. Get some doctors.

I want you all to become full members of The Foot.

I will tell you where we came from.

I Wish.

I wonder where the hell he got those things, anyway.

I'd like to invite you all in...

I'll never call golf a dull game again.

I'll teach you.

I'm

I'm gonna sleep in the truck.

I'm not dreaming, am I?

I'm not finished with you.

I'm okay, really. I'm okay.

I'm ready, hose brain.

I'm sorry, The Foot?

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I know this comes as a blow.

I've been looking all over for you.

I've had the whole city looking for you.

I've never seen anything like this before.

I've only got one thought.

In fact, police have yet to come up with a single eyewitness.

In this you must never lapse.

Instead of getting better, things have actually gotten worse.

Is he ?

It had a name.

It is really quite simple, Miss O'Neil.

It talks.

It's a talent.

It's been a long drive, Raph.

It's coming along nicely.

It's getting so you can't step outside in the daytime anymore.

It's him.

It's just Dan now, okay?

It's really quite incredible.

It's something I owe you.

It's the newslady.

It's time to go back.

Just don't come around here asking for my help anymore.

Just don't push any buttons today. Okay?

Just for a little while, you know?

Just let me stay here the night with you.

Just out, out, out.

Just sit here on our butts.

Just slip it down here.

Just the regular stuff.

Just what is going on out there, April?

Just what is it you hoped to accomplish out there besides busting my chops?

Keep practicing.

Kids.

Leftovers.

Leo...

Leo...

LEONARDO: All right.

LEONARDO: No, it isn't.

LEONARDO: What can we do about it?

Leonardo.

Let's get out of here.

Let's give this a try, see if this transplant worked, fungoid.

Let's go for it.

Llookfike I just called Mike Tyson a sissy.

Look, I don't wanna fight you.

Look. Just take it easy, okay?

Looked like sort of a big turtle in a trench coat.

Looks like your boys are going to need a little

MALE VOICE 1: Spectacular.

MALE VOICE: Oh, man.

MALE VOICES: Oh, yeah.

MAN [ON TV]: Look at the local weather for this vicinity as it stands at this hour.

MAN 1: Hey. MAN 2: Hey.

MAN 1: Okay, okay, move along here.

MAN 1: Yeah. MAN 2: Yeah.

MAN 2: You, you, come here.

MAN 3: Tell me when it's on. MAN 4: Hold the battery.

Man, we could really use Raph right about now.

MAN: Aah...

MAN: Come on, men.

MAN: No, no, no, that's a stereo. SHREDDER: What more from the rat?

MAN: You gotta stop working so hard, April.

Many don't even know they've been victimized until it's too late.

Master Shredder.

Maybe all that hardware's for making coleslaw.

Maybe somebody ought to tell him that we're the good guys.

Maybe you guys should try Rota Rooter.

Merchandise of every size and description...

MICHAELANGELO: 11th and Bleecker?

MICHAELANGELO: It was the impressions, dudes.

MICHAELANGELO: Yes, friends, the new Turbo Ginsu.

MICHAELANGELO: You're standing on it, dude.

Mm hm.

Mm hm.

Mm?

Mm.

Mm.

Mmm.

Mmp! Mm hm.

More words followed...

Move it, will you?

My amazing new friends have suffered their first real defeat.

My dad couldn't care less about me.

My ear is open...

Never lower your eyes to an enemy.

New game, roundhead.

Nice place, guys. In fact, I

Nine point nine five.

Ninja, vanish.

NINJA: Hey. Hmm.

No joke.

No one really knows...

No parent?

No way, atomic mouth.

No, but I was

No, I'm afraid not.

No, please don't call.

No. He does it all the time. He likes it.

No. It's me who should thank you for that privilege, right?

Nobody understands cricket.

Nope. This is only 9th Street. Ha.

Not from you.

Not like that they don't.

Nothing.

Nothing's with me today.

Now I will finish what I began with your ear.

Now what?

Now you are.

Now you face...

Now your fate will be his.

Now, 122, 122 and an eighth?

Now, everybody close your eyes and concentrate.

Now, you know, a little Primatene might just help to clear that up there.

NYah Nyak nyak.

Oh woh oh. Oh oh. Oh oh oh oh oh oh. Wah!

Oh, and what do you want? Do you want a thank you?

Oh, boy, we missed you.

Oh, boy.

Oh, Casey, hi.

Oh, great.

Oh, man, I could really go...

Oh, man.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I'm dead.

Oh, so that's the plan from our great leader, huh?

Oh, Splinter, we were so worried.

Oh, what a spaz.

Oh, who is the babe?

Oh.

Oh. Well, I don't know what to say.

Oh. You guys mind telling me what you're doing to my little green pal over there?

Ohh. A fellow chucker, eh?

Okay, now, what is all this talk about spending the night down here?

Okay. Now, those guys in the black pajamas, they jumped me.

On, baby.

On! Ugh.

One more time.

One nothing!

One of them spoke.

One oh seven, a new record.

Only a few vague reports...

Only effort, discipline, loyalty...

Only one truly important lesson remains, but must wait.

Only then can one receive...

Ooh. Ooh.

Ooh. We're talking major pizza attack here, dudes.

Oops.

Or don't you know?

Our domain is the shadow.

Our nearest neighbor is about four miles away.

Out to a movie.

Perfect.

Pizza dude's got 30 seconds.

Pizza.

Pizza.

Pizza.

Please, no.

Pork rind?

Radical.

Radical.

Radical. Radical. Radical.

Raphael wins.

Raphael, let it go.

RAPHAEL: Come back here.

RAPHAEL: Hey. What?

RAUGHS]

Ready?

Recognize me now, kid?

Regular or menthol?

See, I wouldn't ask for your help...

Seriously, I would like to take this opportunity...

Shaah!

She got jumped in the subway. I had to bring her here.

She's one of the highest paid field reporters in New York City.

Shh.

Shinsho.

SHREDDER [IN VOICEOVER]: You are here...

SHREDDER: Money cannot buy the honor which you have earned tonight.

So don't knock them all out.

So good, in fact, that there appear to be no eyewitnesses...

So much for family, huh?

So wonderful I have to drive him there every morning now...

So you actually played professionally?

So you can talk.

So, what do we do now?

Sock it to me, baby.

Some citizens of New York actually came to my rescue.

Some say that the path from inner turmoil...

Something about the way you described their fighting.

Something familiar.

Something...

SPLINTER: All fathers care for their sons.

SPLINTER: Hey.

SPLINTER: I am proud of you, my sons.

SPLINTER: Raphael, what are you doing?

SPLINTER: Were you seen? Mm mm.

Splinter!

Splinter.

Splinter.

Splinter.

Splinter's alive.

STERNS [OVER PHONE]: Pennington, I thought we had a deal!

STERNS: 555 5215.

STERNS: O'Neil, get in here.

Sticks his head in those things.

Stray from it reluctantly.

Studly.

Sweetcakes?

Take that.

Tang Shen.

TATSU: Master.

TATSU: Nothing.

TATSU: Your empire flourishes, Master Shredder.

TEEN 1: Bad timing.

TEEN 1: I can't wait TEEN 2: I was there. I saw the whole thing.

TEEN 1: Whoa.

TEEN 2: Get her purse. Hey, get her purse. APRIL: Get away from me!

TEEN: Yeah, I'm just so hungry, you know.

Thanks, April.

That okay with you?

That'll do. And the clock's ticking, dude.

That's bad enough...

That's gonna cost you, Tinker Bell.

That's it.

Thatdepends on how fast you stock your pizza.

The only thing safe in the woods would be the trees.

The Professor and Mary Ann, happily ever after.

The Shredder uses you.

The three of you might have overpowered me with the loss of but one.

Then hang there until you die.

Then he was gone and I was alone.

There is a new enemy...

There is no evidence to link such a name to these incidents.

There will be no mistake this time.

These are much more than just a series of random isolated incidents.

These JV lowlifes need a lesson.

These...

They were many, but we kicked

They'd be married and have six kids by now.

They're back.

They're gonna repeat the interview at 5 and 6.

This is beginning to sound less and less...

This is your family.

This is your family.

Time to switch to decaf, April.

Together, there is nothing your four minds cannot accomplish.

Tonight you have learned...

Too cliché.

TURTLES: Huh?

Two minutes for slashing, two minutes for hooking...

Uh... Match you for it?

Unfortunately, the police are the only ones available...

VVhOOps!

War and Peace.

Wayne Gretzky on steroids?

We are presently executing a plan of redeployment...

We can call in the morning. I promise.

We have had our first battle, Master Splinter.

We know, Leo. Of course he is.

We really appreciate, you know, everything.

We were awesome.

We were great. I can't believe it.

We're a family.

We're getting out of here.

Well, above, actually.

Well, he left a message on your machine just before we got out.

Well, hey, you just saved yourself an eight mile round tripper.

Well, I don't.

Well, I guess I've got some walking to do.

Well, I was gonna give you guys a tour of the store.

Well, it looks like you're the one who needs to be taught a lesson, pal.

Well, it was a shell of a good hit.

Well, maybe I'll just take my attitude andleavel

Well, this is like meditating.

Well, tough rocks, pal.

Well, where are the keys?

Well?

What are these freaks?

What are we just standing here for? Let's get him.

What do you think?

What for?

What he means is that you're afraid of enclosed areas.

What is it?

What Russian novel, embracing more than 500 characters...

What that means, Miss O'Neil, is that we have everything well in hand.

What the hell was that?

What?

What?

What? You don't need an ambulance, do you?

What's a guy got to do to get some food around here?

What's with you today?

Whatever happened to this Oroku Saki?

When we were forced to come to New York...

Where did he go?

Where do they come up with this stuff?

Where have you been?

Where is my cigar?

Where the heck is 122 and an eighth?

Where's Raphael?

Who are we gonna call?

Who are you?

Who says everyone in the Big Apple looks the other way?

Who the heck is that?

Whoa. Master Tatsu, stop, please, please.

Whoa. Whiff er.

Whoo hoo. Ha ha ha.

Whoop! Yaah!

Why do the turtles trouble you, master?

Why don't I ever dream of Harrison Ford?

Why don't I ever fall in with people who own condos?

Why don't you take it easy for a while? Just Just

Why?

Why? Why? Oh, I don't know.

Wicked.

Wicked.

Will you just shut up and kiss me, okay? I got a report to do.

With complaints ranging from purse snatching...

WOMAN [OVER TV]: Much more than just a series of small, isolated incidents...

WOMAN: How are you doing, lady?

WOMAN: Mr. Pennington, Chief Sterns' office.

WOMAN: See you later. What's this for?

Would you mind repeating it...

Yeah, come on, you ugly muggers.

Yeah, I've been down at my hideout a lot lately.

Yeah, Leo, I'm crazy. Okay?

Yeah, well, she has her own corner office.

Yeah, yeah, all right, Leo.

Yeah?

Yeah? Well, you act like a jerk sometimes, you know that?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah. Who's this?

Yee ha!

Yes, and I can also listen.

Yes, dudes and dudettes...

Yes, Master Tatsu.

You

You are a tough negotiator, Charles.

You are here because the outside world rejects you.

You are my eyes and ears. Find them.

You are still young...

You are unique among your brothers...

You call this here...

You can have an office.

You did your job, now let me do mine.

You dirty rat. Mmm.

You expect me to waste manpower...

You fight well in the old style...

You got a son named Danny, Charles?

You got any cigarettes?

You gotta know what a crumpet is to understand cricket.

You guys must be studying the abridged book of ninja fighting.

You killed my brother.

You know, a couple of throw pillows, a TV news reporter.

You lie.

You make us all proud.

You mean Charles?

You put anchovies on this thing and you're in big trouble, okay?

You still haven't told us how you got away from your attacker.

You were fired.

You will listen now.

You.

You. Hm!

You'll be all right. You'll be all right.

You'll get your answers there.

You're awake. How do you feel?

You're going to LaGuardia, right?

You're gonna be okay, Raph.

You're gonna be okay.

You're letting him blow right by you.

You're lying to me.

You're telling me.

Your mouth may yet bring you much trouble, Miss O'Neil.

Your teenage minds are broad, eager.

Yuch.

0K8)'

122 and an eighth. Terrific.

Aah. Yes, Oroku Saki.

Ah. Hey, I am your man. I am Mr. Fix it.

Ah. The rat, so it has a name. Huh?

Ahh. The name's Casey Jones.

April, hey, you were great. Thanks, Mikey.

Bitching. Yeah.

Bodacious. Yeah.

Bring water, cold washcloth, pillow. Far out.

Bye. Later.

Can you believe this guy? Hmm?

Charles, no. What's wrong?

Chevy Nova? Oh.

Come on, let's move it. I'm starving. Ooh.

Come on. What have you been up to?

Contact local police or get in touch with us

Damn. Great. Wah!

Danny, listen, your dad, he's Hold on, hold it.

Deal. See you around.

Does this thing work? No.

Evening, bros. Whoo!

Exactly, June. Boy, she's a good reporter.

Fight? Fight.

Find her. It often seems that somebody ought to.

Fine. Oh, wonderful.

Fine. Thank you. Yeah. No, thank you.

Get it? APRIL: Yuck.

Gnarly. Ha ha ha.

Gnarly. Ha ha ha.

Good night. MAN: Good night.

Good. Great.

Guys II' Um.' 44mm?

Hah! Hah! Hah! Ooh.

Hand me a towel, will you? CHARLES: Where do you keep the towels?

He just needs to blow off some steam. Yeah.

Heh. Mm hm.

Hey, what are you, some sort of punker? Huh?

Hey, what do you want? Shh, shh.

Hey, what the ? MICHAELANGELO: Whoa.

Hey, what's the deal? You got to come with me.

Hey. Thanks, spaz.

Hmm. Oh, no.

Home sweet home. APRIL: Ha ha.

Huh? Ah.

Huh? Weapons.

Hurry up. Get the money. I got her watch.

I don't know. You don't know?

I don't think it's loaded, kid. Danny...

I just saved myself? Yeah.

I know. Huh?

I see. Well, perhaps if any of our viewers Oh, God.

I was just trying to break it to you easy. Oh, well, you failed miserably.

I'll take care of it myself. Fine, that's up to you.

It was a joke. Hmm?

Kitchen? Kitchen.

Let's go. Lead the way, toots.

Mmm. I'm in love. What do you know about an organization...

No, he's alive. Barely. APRIL: Oh, God.

No. And you're hiding something as well.